1 00:00:01,199 --> 00:00:04,019 [instrumental music] 2 00:00:04,040 --> 00:00:05,230 Well, I got a pair of eights. 3 00:00:05,250 --> 00:00:09,119 Ah, sorry about that, bro. I got a Dolly Parton. 4 00:00:09,140 --> 00:00:13,039 - What's that? - A bigger pair. Whaa! 5 00:00:13,060 --> 00:00:16,170 Will, I've got a surprise for your bachelor party. 6 00:00:16,190 --> 00:00:19,190 I booked the penthouse suite at the La Peer Hotel. 7 00:00:19,210 --> 00:00:20,289 Really? 8 00:00:21,010 --> 00:00:24,039 Oh, man, I could just kiss you. 9 00:00:24,059 --> 00:00:26,059 I could just kiss you, too. 10 00:00:27,289 --> 00:00:32,020 But, perhaps, my time would be better spent learning a talent. 11 00:00:32,039 --> 00:00:35,009 Hey, he isn't making calls on your bachelor party, is he? 12 00:00:35,030 --> 00:00:36,189 I mean, that's my job. 13 00:00:36,210 --> 00:00:40,000 I mean, you have told him that I'm the best man? 14 00:00:40,020 --> 00:00:43,219 Uh.. See, what had happened.. 15 00:00:45,070 --> 00:00:48,200 At first, but then.. 16 00:00:49,210 --> 00:00:51,009 ...he had called.. 17 00:00:51,030 --> 00:00:54,229 Will...go tell him. 18 00:00:54,250 --> 00:00:58,259 [sighs] Tsk. Next time I'm gonna let Jazz kiss you. 19 00:01:01,100 --> 00:01:04,049 Hey, Jazz, listen, um, we need to talk, man. 20 00:01:04,069 --> 00:01:06,090 Yes, we do, the Strip 'N Trip just wanna know 21 00:01:06,109 --> 00:01:09,060 if the hotel will furnish extension cords? 22 00:01:09,079 --> 00:01:11,189 Oh, yeah, and tell Naughty Nelvina and The Naked Drill Team 23 00:01:11,210 --> 00:01:14,129 to wear coats or they'll never get past hotel security. 24 00:01:15,030 --> 00:01:17,019 Okay. 25 00:01:17,039 --> 00:01:18,219 Now, what was it you wanted to talk about? 26 00:01:18,239 --> 00:01:20,260 You're the best, man. 27 00:01:22,140 --> 00:01:24,060 [theme song] 28 00:01:24,079 --> 00:01:26,189 ♪ Now this is a story all about how ♪ 29 00:01:26,210 --> 00:01:28,269 ♪ My life got flipped turned upside down ♪ 30 00:01:28,289 --> 00:01:31,069 ♪ And I'd like to take a minute Just sit right there ♪ 31 00:01:31,090 --> 00:01:32,200 ♪ I'll tell you how I became the prince ♪ 32 00:01:32,219 --> 00:01:34,009 ♪ Of a town called Bel-Air ♪ 33 00:01:34,030 --> 00:01:37,039 [music continues] 34 00:01:43,039 --> 00:01:45,180 ♪ In West Philadelphia born and raised ♪ 35 00:01:45,200 --> 00:01:48,109 ♪ On the playground was where I spent most of my days ♪ 36 00:01:48,129 --> 00:01:50,069 ♪ Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool ♪ 37 00:01:50,090 --> 00:01:52,250 ♪ And all shootin some B-ball outside of the school ♪ 38 00:01:52,270 --> 00:01:55,120 ♪ When a couple of guys who were up to no good ♪ 39 00:01:55,140 --> 00:01:57,120 ♪ Started makin' trouble in my neighborhood ♪ 40 00:01:57,140 --> 00:01:59,219 ♪ I got in one little fight and my mom got scared ♪ 41 00:01:59,240 --> 00:02:01,019 ♪ And said you're movin' with your auntie ♪ 42 00:02:01,040 --> 00:02:02,129 ♪ And uncle in Bel-Air ♪ 43 00:02:02,150 --> 00:02:04,120 ♪ I whistled for a cab and when it came near ♪ 44 00:02:04,140 --> 00:02:07,030 ♪ The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror ♪ 45 00:02:07,049 --> 00:02:09,110 ♪ If anything I could say that this cab was rare ♪ 46 00:02:09,129 --> 00:02:13,030 ♪ But I thought nah forget it yo homes to Bel-Air ♪ 47 00:02:13,050 --> 00:02:16,170 ♪ I pulled up to the house about seven or eight ♪ 48 00:02:16,189 --> 00:02:19,039 ♪ And I yelled to the cabbie yo homes smell ya later ♪ 49 00:02:19,060 --> 00:02:21,170 ♪ I looked at my kingdom I was finally there ♪ 50 00:02:21,189 --> 00:02:24,139 ♪ To sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air ♪♪ 51 00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:40,030 [instrumental music] 52 00:02:42,199 --> 00:02:46,009 Now, a-are you positive you can't see anything? 53 00:02:46,030 --> 00:02:48,030 Yes, I am positive. 54 00:02:48,050 --> 00:02:50,189 Super. Ow! 55 00:02:52,060 --> 00:02:55,189 Now how could I miss that big square head of yours? 56 00:02:55,210 --> 00:02:57,039 Oh, look, come on, Will. 57 00:02:57,060 --> 00:02:59,020 Now I've spent a lot of time decorating 58 00:02:59,039 --> 00:03:00,099 for your bachelor party. 59 00:03:00,120 --> 00:03:02,090 Now I just want it to be a surprise. 60 00:03:02,110 --> 00:03:05,189 Oh, no, not another Scooby-Doopinata. 61 00:03:05,210 --> 00:03:07,219 Pssh. I wish. 62 00:03:09,039 --> 00:03:11,090 Look, no offense, Scrappy, but it's gonna be hard 63 00:03:11,110 --> 00:03:12,270 to top the parties I've been to. 64 00:03:12,289 --> 00:03:16,050 (all in unison) Go, Will. Go, Will. Go, Will. 65 00:03:16,069 --> 00:03:19,039 Go, Will. Go, Will. Go, Will. 66 00:03:19,060 --> 00:03:22,110 [upbeat music on speaker] 67 00:03:29,009 --> 00:03:30,099 Hey, no. 68 00:03:31,219 --> 00:03:33,229 Girl, I'm sure glad we got rid of that nut. 69 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:38,009 [instrumental music] 70 00:03:41,150 --> 00:03:44,210 Ah. You can't hang, can you, baby? 71 00:03:44,229 --> 00:03:47,250 [jazz music] 72 00:03:49,060 --> 00:03:50,180 ♪ No one even knows it ♪ 73 00:03:50,199 --> 00:03:53,009 ♪ Girl to me you just can't show it ♪ 74 00:03:53,030 --> 00:03:54,250 ♪ You know that I won't buy it ♪ 75 00:03:54,270 --> 00:03:57,009 ♪ Girl there's no use to tryin' to hide it ♪ 76 00:03:57,030 --> 00:03:59,180 ♪ 'Cause I girl you know I need it.. ♪♪ 77 00:04:02,169 --> 00:04:03,210 [indistinct chatter] 78 00:04:03,229 --> 00:04:06,069 What do you two think you're doing? 79 00:04:06,090 --> 00:04:09,039 Oh, I, I was trying to get up to my room. 80 00:04:11,189 --> 00:04:13,009 Hey, Tom, what was you doing? 81 00:04:13,030 --> 00:04:15,080 I was trying to be in the video. 82 00:04:17,180 --> 00:04:20,259 - Man, this party is dull. - No, man, this party is stupid. 83 00:04:20,279 --> 00:04:25,100 No, no, no, this party is crazy, flat, dumb, dumb, doodie. 84 00:04:25,120 --> 00:04:27,259 You're the man. You're the man. 85 00:04:27,279 --> 00:04:29,019 - You're the man. - You're the man. 86 00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:30,189 [both screaming] 87 00:04:32,029 --> 00:04:33,279 You just wait, I've set you up 88 00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:36,120 with one heck of a wingding, Will. 89 00:04:36,139 --> 00:04:38,199 You won't regret makin' me the best man. 90 00:04:38,220 --> 00:04:40,250 Oh! Oh, yes. Um.. 91 00:04:40,269 --> 00:04:44,120 That's one little thing I wanted to talk to you about, see. 92 00:04:44,139 --> 00:04:45,279 What? 93 00:04:47,290 --> 00:04:51,000 You know, being best man does have its perks. 94 00:04:53,029 --> 00:04:54,220 That was it. 95 00:04:56,040 --> 00:04:57,120 C.. 96 00:05:02,089 --> 00:05:03,279 Jazz is the best man? 97 00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:06,029 Then what the heck am I? 98 00:05:06,050 --> 00:05:07,139 Short. 99 00:05:08,199 --> 00:05:10,189 Hey, hey, hey, come on, come on. 100 00:05:10,209 --> 00:05:13,029 Now, you guys are both my best men. 101 00:05:13,050 --> 00:05:15,220 Carlton, you're the best man for the wedding. 102 00:05:15,240 --> 00:05:17,279 And Jazz is the best man for getting the talent 103 00:05:18,000 --> 00:05:19,029 for the bachelor party. 104 00:05:19,050 --> 00:05:20,290 Tsk. Ugh. 105 00:05:21,009 --> 00:05:23,290 He got me Rowanda, the Rubber Lady. 106 00:05:26,129 --> 00:05:29,189 Look, I'll have you know that Stan, the world's smartest duck 107 00:05:29,209 --> 00:05:32,009 was this close to getting on Leno. 108 00:05:32,259 --> 00:05:34,069 [snorts] 109 00:05:34,090 --> 00:05:36,170 What the heck does, ahem, supposed to mean? 110 00:05:38,009 --> 00:05:40,189 Listen, this is no time to fight, alright? 111 00:05:42,019 --> 00:05:43,290 (Jazz) You're right, my brother. 112 00:05:44,009 --> 00:05:47,040 Tonight, we salute the passin' of one of the greats. 113 00:05:47,060 --> 00:05:50,079 Ah, yeah, let's have a moment of silence 114 00:05:50,100 --> 00:05:53,269 for all the girls that have found me irresistible. 115 00:05:55,220 --> 00:05:58,100 Mirror, mirror on the wall 116 00:05:58,120 --> 00:06:01,230 Jean-Claude Van Damme, I'm fine. 117 00:06:03,209 --> 00:06:05,209 You are my man. 118 00:06:08,079 --> 00:06:09,230 Amen. 119 00:06:23,220 --> 00:06:25,110 Do you like it? 120 00:06:26,149 --> 00:06:27,269 Wow. 121 00:06:29,259 --> 00:06:31,129 I love it. 122 00:06:31,149 --> 00:06:33,199 - Alright, now take it off. - Oh, wait, wait.. 123 00:06:33,220 --> 00:06:36,149 You, you know, if-if-if somebody 124 00:06:36,170 --> 00:06:39,230 was-was to walk in here right now.. 125 00:06:43,209 --> 00:06:46,290 ...they, they might think you was hittin' on me. 126 00:06:47,009 --> 00:06:49,209 Trust me, if I was hittin' on you 127 00:06:49,230 --> 00:06:51,090 you'd know it. 128 00:06:53,290 --> 00:06:56,139 Really? How? 129 00:07:01,170 --> 00:07:03,170 Okay, you made your point. 130 00:07:05,279 --> 00:07:07,250 Hey, you're not the only one who had to fight off 131 00:07:07,269 --> 00:07:09,290 the women, bub. 132 00:07:10,009 --> 00:07:13,069 This is Tina. Tina, this is my brother, Carlton. 133 00:07:13,089 --> 00:07:15,259 - Hi, Tina. - Hi. 134 00:07:15,279 --> 00:07:17,230 Uh, I love your towel. 135 00:07:19,240 --> 00:07:22,240 Thanks. Well, I gotta go prepare for debate practice. 136 00:07:22,259 --> 00:07:25,100 You're on the debate team? 137 00:07:25,120 --> 00:07:27,259 That is so cool. 138 00:07:27,279 --> 00:07:30,220 Which one of these losers is my date? 139 00:07:30,240 --> 00:07:32,129 That would be me. 140 00:07:33,230 --> 00:07:36,019 Uh, this is my cousin, Carlton. 141 00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:37,220 Where's the rest of him? 142 00:07:38,250 --> 00:07:41,009 I may be short, but you know what they say 143 00:07:41,029 --> 00:07:43,240 about short men and tall women, don't you? 144 00:07:44,279 --> 00:07:46,159 No. What? 145 00:07:46,180 --> 00:07:49,050 I don't know, just making conversation. 146 00:07:49,069 --> 00:07:51,220 Hey, small stuff, you wanna come back here 147 00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:54,240 and check out the rest of my merchandise? 148 00:07:56,199 --> 00:08:00,009 How can anybody with a sorry list like that be the best man? 149 00:08:02,189 --> 00:08:04,209 That's it. 150 00:08:04,230 --> 00:08:06,269 We're staying right here until you decide 151 00:08:06,290 --> 00:08:08,009 who is your best man. 152 00:08:08,029 --> 00:08:10,069 Look, Carlton, would you stop playin'? 153 00:08:10,089 --> 00:08:11,149 Now, move. 154 00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:16,160 Minimart here is right, who's it gonna be? 155 00:08:16,180 --> 00:08:17,230 Me or him? 156 00:08:17,250 --> 00:08:19,139 You know what, in one minute, y'all two 157 00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:22,110 can Jell-O wrestle for the title, okay? Okay. 158 00:08:28,259 --> 00:08:31,269 [electricity crackling] 159 00:08:33,190 --> 00:08:38,039 Oh, man...didn't your mothers ever tell you 160 00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:40,039 don't play with buttons? 161 00:08:41,190 --> 00:08:42,190 [knock on door] 162 00:08:42,210 --> 00:08:45,039 Hello! 163 00:08:45,059 --> 00:08:48,100 They can't hear you, bro. The music's too loud. 164 00:08:48,120 --> 00:08:50,100 Can I throw a party or what? 165 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:53,039 I don't believe this. 166 00:08:53,059 --> 00:08:55,240 There's a python and some triplets in there 167 00:08:55,259 --> 00:08:59,129 and I'm stuck in here with Ren and Stumpy. 168 00:08:59,149 --> 00:09:01,059 Oh, come on, guy, cheer up. 169 00:09:01,080 --> 00:09:04,250 They'll have us out of here in an hour, tops. 170 00:09:04,269 --> 00:09:07,210 We're out of food. We're out of water. 171 00:09:07,230 --> 00:09:11,129 I mean, how long can we survive like this? 172 00:09:11,149 --> 00:09:14,039 We've only been in here for five minutes, Carlton. 173 00:09:14,059 --> 00:09:15,169 Get a grip. 174 00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:19,169 Get off of me. 175 00:09:20,179 --> 00:09:22,009 Let's just relax. 176 00:09:22,029 --> 00:09:24,000 I've been in plenty worse situations 177 00:09:24,019 --> 00:09:25,200 than this. Trust me. 178 00:09:25,220 --> 00:09:28,100 [yelling] Earthquake! 179 00:09:28,120 --> 00:09:30,259 Baby, it was just a little earthquake. 180 00:09:30,279 --> 00:09:33,190 Baby, no, listen. Listen, no. The ground moved, okay? 181 00:09:33,210 --> 00:09:35,070 The ground. The ground moved. 182 00:09:35,090 --> 00:09:38,190 Nobody was bothering it, it just moved, alright? 183 00:09:38,210 --> 00:09:41,100 But it's over now and we're fine. 184 00:09:41,120 --> 00:09:43,149 I am not fine, alright? I'm a grown man. 185 00:09:43,169 --> 00:09:45,110 And I'm sittin' under the table huggin' a teddy bear. 186 00:09:45,129 --> 00:09:48,019 - I am not fine. - Uh-oh. 187 00:09:48,039 --> 00:09:49,149 Well, what's the matter? 188 00:09:49,169 --> 00:09:51,279 Um, my water broke. 189 00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:54,110 Oh, that's cool, we got another one right here in the fridge. 190 00:09:55,049 --> 00:09:56,269 [indistinct chatter] 191 00:09:58,070 --> 00:10:01,000 And Dougie is a barn dog. 192 00:10:01,019 --> 00:10:04,019 Unbelievable. Will Smith apologizing. 193 00:10:04,039 --> 00:10:06,059 My sisters, welcome the newest member 194 00:10:06,080 --> 00:10:08,120 of Kappa Phi Gamma, Lisa Wilkes. 195 00:10:08,139 --> 00:10:10,070 - Alright. - Alright. 196 00:10:11,190 --> 00:10:14,029 Hey, wait, wait, wait. Wait, whoa, whoa, hold up. 197 00:10:14,049 --> 00:10:15,220 Wait, y'all-y'all just going to leave me hangin' up here 198 00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:18,000 like a piece of Rotisserie Gold, huh? 199 00:10:18,019 --> 00:10:19,149 Take my baby girl to Palm Springs? 200 00:10:19,169 --> 00:10:21,220 Oh, you've done it now, boy. 201 00:10:21,240 --> 00:10:23,110 - 'I'm really mad now.' - No, no, no, no! 202 00:10:23,129 --> 00:10:26,139 [screaming] 203 00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:31,210 - Oh! - Oh, oh. 204 00:10:31,230 --> 00:10:34,149 - The engine's dead. - What? 205 00:10:38,000 --> 00:10:39,090 Yeah. 206 00:10:40,230 --> 00:10:44,019 Oh, so I, uh, I guess we're going down, huh? 207 00:10:44,039 --> 00:10:46,149 Faster than a bucket of chicken at "Oprah's." 208 00:10:48,049 --> 00:10:50,159 Oh, so I should probably just confess 209 00:10:50,179 --> 00:10:52,129 all the nasty things I've done 210 00:10:52,149 --> 00:10:54,139 with your daughter, huh? 211 00:10:54,159 --> 00:10:56,230 Especially seeing as how, in any second now 212 00:10:56,250 --> 00:10:57,269 we're gonna be splattering 213 00:10:57,289 --> 00:11:00,090 all over those mountains down there. 214 00:11:00,110 --> 00:11:02,029 Let me tell you something. I'm from Philly. 215 00:11:02,049 --> 00:11:03,220 You got to wake up pretty early in the morning 216 00:11:03,240 --> 00:11:04,240 to get me with some old.. 217 00:11:04,259 --> 00:11:06,059 [door slams] 218 00:11:12,100 --> 00:11:13,250 Mr. Adams? 219 00:11:20,240 --> 00:11:22,120 Mr. Adams? 220 00:11:23,149 --> 00:11:25,190 Mr. Adams? 221 00:11:25,210 --> 00:11:28,220 [engine rumbling] 222 00:11:35,190 --> 00:11:37,250 [screaming] 223 00:11:37,269 --> 00:11:40,039 And I came out of that without a scratch. 224 00:11:40,059 --> 00:11:42,000 So just calm down, alright? 225 00:11:42,019 --> 00:11:43,210 Shh. 226 00:11:43,230 --> 00:11:45,110 Listen. 227 00:11:45,129 --> 00:11:47,000 I know that sound anywhere. 228 00:11:47,019 --> 00:11:50,019 - What sound? - A Wonderbra hittin' the floor. 229 00:11:51,120 --> 00:11:53,230 Let me out! Let me out! 230 00:11:53,250 --> 00:11:57,080 This is all your fault, you finger-lickin' ragamuffin. 231 00:11:57,100 --> 00:12:00,039 Who are you callin' muffin, Little Debbie? 232 00:12:00,059 --> 00:12:02,110 Alright, alright, stop it, stop it. 233 00:12:02,129 --> 00:12:04,259 Come on, ain't no time to tootsie roll, fool. 234 00:12:04,279 --> 00:12:06,230 Fight like a man. 235 00:12:06,250 --> 00:12:08,250 Alright, guys, guys. 236 00:12:13,110 --> 00:12:16,090 [grunting] 237 00:12:19,149 --> 00:12:23,129 [gasps] Okay. Nobody move. 238 00:12:24,070 --> 00:12:26,019 Ah.. 239 00:12:26,039 --> 00:12:28,259 - Ahh.. Ahh.. - Choo! 240 00:12:31,029 --> 00:12:34,059 [all screaming] 241 00:12:38,009 --> 00:12:39,070 [all screaming] 242 00:12:44,169 --> 00:12:46,039 [chuckles] 243 00:12:46,059 --> 00:12:47,090 We stopped. 244 00:12:47,110 --> 00:12:49,029 [laughing] 245 00:12:49,049 --> 00:12:53,080 We stopped! It's a miracle! 246 00:12:53,100 --> 00:12:57,019 Wow! Gravity. What a rush. 247 00:12:57,039 --> 00:13:00,259 - 'Hello, elevator repairman.' - We don't have time to chat. 248 00:13:00,279 --> 00:13:03,110 - We're stuck in here! - Shut up, Jazz. 249 00:13:03,129 --> 00:13:05,070 That's the elevator repairman. 250 00:13:05,090 --> 00:13:07,149 Help! 251 00:13:07,169 --> 00:13:10,169 (male #1) 'Just stay calm. We'll get you out of there.' 252 00:13:10,190 --> 00:13:13,120 'Can't guarantee it'll be in one piece.' 253 00:13:13,139 --> 00:13:17,269 Man, I'd rather be anybody but myself right now. 254 00:13:17,289 --> 00:13:20,129 Well, it certainly wouldn't be the first time. 255 00:13:25,080 --> 00:13:28,059 Okay, now, just remember, you're from Connecticut 256 00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:29,279 and you transferred to Bel-Air Academy 257 00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:31,269 and you row on the crew team. 258 00:13:31,289 --> 00:13:34,059 Now, where did you transfer from? 259 00:13:34,080 --> 00:13:36,070 - Bend over. - It's Andover. 260 00:13:36,090 --> 00:13:38,009 We're going back home. 261 00:13:40,179 --> 00:13:43,139 Ah. Mr. Banks, did you forget something? 262 00:13:43,159 --> 00:13:45,019 Uh, you know, I'm glad you asked. 263 00:13:45,039 --> 00:13:48,059 I forgot to give you the number to my direct line. 264 00:13:48,080 --> 00:13:50,179 Ah, look, I'm very flattered, but I.. 265 00:13:50,200 --> 00:13:55,070 You know, that is an absolutely intoxicating fragrance 266 00:13:55,090 --> 00:13:56,190 that you're wearing. 267 00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:58,029 Uh.. 268 00:13:58,049 --> 00:13:59,200 Come closer. 269 00:13:59,220 --> 00:14:01,159 Hey-y-y. 270 00:14:05,090 --> 00:14:07,120 That's a fake mustache. 271 00:14:07,139 --> 00:14:09,190 No, it's not. 272 00:14:09,210 --> 00:14:12,139 [gasps] Yes, it is! 273 00:14:12,159 --> 00:14:14,039 No, it's not. 274 00:14:16,019 --> 00:14:19,090 Look, I don't know who you are, but I'm calling your 275 00:14:19,110 --> 00:14:21,049 real parents right now. 276 00:14:22,110 --> 00:14:25,009 - Will. - No, it's not. 277 00:14:27,159 --> 00:14:29,110 Is that fat guy followin' us? 278 00:14:31,080 --> 00:14:34,009 What fat guy? Come on. 279 00:14:52,220 --> 00:14:55,019 Excuse me, is there some reason why you're followin' us? 280 00:15:02,139 --> 00:15:05,080 - Will? - Well, it ain't Fat Albert. 281 00:15:09,039 --> 00:15:12,110 [crying] We've been in here for hours, man. 282 00:15:12,129 --> 00:15:14,159 I don't wanna die. 283 00:15:14,179 --> 00:15:16,240 I wanna live. 284 00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:22,049 Look, at least you got a chance to live life to its fullest. 285 00:15:22,070 --> 00:15:25,200 I only had one woman. One! 286 00:15:25,220 --> 00:15:27,200 I don't want this to end. 287 00:15:27,220 --> 00:15:29,139 It doesn't have to. 288 00:15:33,029 --> 00:15:34,250 Will you marry me? 289 00:15:34,269 --> 00:15:37,059 [laughing] 290 00:15:37,080 --> 00:15:40,039 You are too adorable for words. 291 00:15:41,220 --> 00:15:43,279 Can I give you a kiss goodbye? 292 00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:45,149 Yes. 293 00:15:47,220 --> 00:15:49,190 Tomorrow morning. 294 00:15:54,179 --> 00:15:57,039 Well, what time should I come back? 295 00:16:01,100 --> 00:16:03,200 My life has been so pathetic. 296 00:16:04,230 --> 00:16:06,120 No, it hasn't. 297 00:16:07,120 --> 00:16:09,059 Well, yeah, it has. 298 00:16:10,230 --> 00:16:13,139 Who cares? It's over. 299 00:16:13,159 --> 00:16:16,210 When the elevator was falling and I thought we were gonna die 300 00:16:16,230 --> 00:16:19,289 your life flashed before my eyes. 301 00:16:20,009 --> 00:16:23,080 If I only had your magic with the women. 302 00:16:23,100 --> 00:16:25,090 Come on, Carlton, all these years, man 303 00:16:25,110 --> 00:16:26,240 haven't you caught on? 304 00:16:26,259 --> 00:16:30,159 I mean, half the battle is the lyrics you toss at the honeys. 305 00:16:30,179 --> 00:16:32,169 Girl, you look so good, I wish I could plant you 306 00:16:32,190 --> 00:16:34,179 and grow a whole field of y'all. 307 00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:37,230 Girl, I got to tell you. 308 00:16:37,250 --> 00:16:40,220 That suit look like a piece of good God 309 00:16:40,240 --> 00:16:42,039 wrapped up with some have mercy 310 00:16:42,059 --> 00:16:43,190 with a side of oomph! 311 00:16:43,210 --> 00:16:47,039 I think I've seen your picture somewhere before. 312 00:16:47,059 --> 00:16:49,039 Oh, yeah, that's right, it was in the dictionary 313 00:16:49,059 --> 00:16:51,190 next to "Ka-blam!" 314 00:16:51,210 --> 00:16:55,080 - Two cappuccinos, please. - Mm. 315 00:16:55,100 --> 00:16:57,120 Well, I'm hoping you like it dark 316 00:16:57,139 --> 00:17:02,059 hot, sweet and, uh, with a spoon in it. 317 00:17:04,109 --> 00:17:07,140 Look, um, miss, I'd just like to apologize 318 00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:11,220 on behalf of my gender for his rude behavior. 319 00:17:11,240 --> 00:17:13,289 - That's okay. - No, it's not. 320 00:17:14,009 --> 00:17:17,039 He-he had no reason to act like that. 321 00:17:17,059 --> 00:17:18,200 I'm sorry. 322 00:17:20,049 --> 00:17:21,289 It's okay. 323 00:17:22,009 --> 00:17:24,279 Look, um, could I call you sometime? 324 00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:29,059 - Yeah...call me. - Thank you. 325 00:17:37,269 --> 00:17:39,289 Yo, baby, I know your feet must be tired 326 00:17:40,009 --> 00:17:42,000 'cause you've been runnin' through my mind all day! 327 00:17:42,019 --> 00:17:44,009 Come here, baby. 328 00:17:44,029 --> 00:17:45,140 Oh, come, come, my brother. 329 00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:48,109 You don't always leave the party with a favor. 330 00:17:48,130 --> 00:17:50,119 That's it, I didn't come all the way here from Philly to hear-- 331 00:17:50,140 --> 00:17:52,049 - Oh, it's gonna happen-- - I've had it.. 332 00:17:52,069 --> 00:17:55,000 [clamoring] 333 00:17:55,019 --> 00:17:58,039 - Excuse me! Excuse me! - You need to shut up. 334 00:17:58,059 --> 00:18:00,170 You know what? You ain't never gonna change. 335 00:18:00,190 --> 00:18:02,109 - Oh, give me the last word. - Oh, give me the last word. 336 00:18:02,130 --> 00:18:03,190 - Oh, no, you're not. - Oh, no, you're not. 337 00:18:03,210 --> 00:18:05,000 - Oh, yes, I am. - Oh, yes, I am. 338 00:18:05,019 --> 00:18:06,160 - Damn! - Damn! 339 00:18:09,069 --> 00:18:11,109 Yeah, sure, bring up the one time 340 00:18:11,130 --> 00:18:13,180 that a woman walks away from me. 341 00:18:14,210 --> 00:18:16,180 - One time? - One time? 342 00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:21,099 Hold, hold, hold it, baby, see, now, I noticed you noticin' me. 343 00:18:21,119 --> 00:18:23,170 So, I just want to put you on notice 344 00:18:23,190 --> 00:18:26,069 that I noticed you, too. 345 00:18:26,089 --> 00:18:27,079 And? 346 00:18:27,099 --> 00:18:28,180 And to let you know that I might 347 00:18:28,200 --> 00:18:30,269 consider letting you be with me. 348 00:18:30,289 --> 00:18:33,119 Is that what passes for a compliment around here? 349 00:18:33,140 --> 00:18:35,019 - Look, baby, listen. - No, you listen. 350 00:18:35,039 --> 00:18:36,220 If you want a shot at being with me 351 00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:38,029 maybe you should try talking to me 352 00:18:38,049 --> 00:18:40,250 like a human being, okay? Got it? 353 00:18:44,230 --> 00:18:48,109 Actually, baby, you got it, but I take donations. 354 00:18:48,130 --> 00:18:51,029 You're so ugly, she tied a pork chop around your neck 355 00:18:51,049 --> 00:18:53,049 just so the dog would play with you. 356 00:18:55,000 --> 00:18:57,109 Well, you so ugly, your mama had to feed you 357 00:18:57,130 --> 00:18:58,289 with a slingshot. 358 00:19:00,190 --> 00:19:02,289 You're so ugly, that ain't a fade on your head 359 00:19:03,009 --> 00:19:06,160 that's your hair runnin' away from your face. 360 00:19:06,180 --> 00:19:09,240 Well, now, you know that Hank Farley is not your type. 361 00:19:09,259 --> 00:19:12,029 I was saying, you-you strip away the shoulder pads 362 00:19:12,049 --> 00:19:13,130 and the muscles, and the dimples 363 00:19:13,150 --> 00:19:14,230 and what you got? 364 00:19:14,250 --> 00:19:16,180 You. 365 00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:19,269 Does this look like a place to have fun? 366 00:19:19,289 --> 00:19:23,220 I don't think so. Ain't nobody going to have no fun up in here. 367 00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:26,039 Not me, not you, not her. 368 00:19:26,059 --> 00:19:30,039 And definitely not me. Goodbye, Will. 369 00:19:30,059 --> 00:19:32,000 Whoa, baby. Oh, come back here. 370 00:19:32,019 --> 00:19:33,250 What is her name? 371 00:19:35,150 --> 00:19:37,170 [elevator creaking] 372 00:19:37,190 --> 00:19:41,190 - Oh, no, no, no! - Oh! 373 00:19:41,210 --> 00:19:43,079 [all screaming] 374 00:19:43,099 --> 00:19:46,200 Carlton, Carlton, man, I'm sorry about all those short jokes. 375 00:19:46,220 --> 00:19:49,089 You know, it really took a big man to handle it. 376 00:19:49,109 --> 00:19:52,039 And, well, you tried your best, okay? 377 00:19:52,059 --> 00:19:53,250 I love you, man. 378 00:19:53,269 --> 00:19:55,289 I love you too, Will. 379 00:19:56,009 --> 00:19:58,079 You too, man. 380 00:19:58,099 --> 00:20:02,039 Somebody give me some love. Please! 381 00:20:02,059 --> 00:20:05,069 [breathing heavily] 382 00:20:06,170 --> 00:20:07,269 Oh! 383 00:20:09,130 --> 00:20:12,109 - 'We're goin' up.' - 'We're gonna live.' 384 00:20:12,130 --> 00:20:15,230 I'm gonna have one more chance to do the wild thing. 385 00:20:16,130 --> 00:20:18,019 Get off me. 386 00:20:19,210 --> 00:20:22,029 Whew! The guest of honor is in the house. 387 00:20:22,049 --> 00:20:24,000 Party over here. 388 00:20:25,019 --> 00:20:27,279 [upbeat music] 389 00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:29,009 Oh, oh, oh. 390 00:20:29,029 --> 00:20:32,059 [indistinct chatter] 391 00:20:37,130 --> 00:20:40,289 (Geoffrey) Hey, good evening, Master William. 392 00:20:41,009 --> 00:20:44,210 Absolutely bumping party. 393 00:20:44,230 --> 00:20:46,170 Oh, yeah. Thanks a lot, Geoffrey. 394 00:20:48,039 --> 00:20:49,099 Geoffrey? 395 00:20:49,119 --> 00:20:51,160 But you told me your name was Will. 396 00:20:51,180 --> 00:20:55,099 No, I said I was Will-ing. 397 00:20:55,119 --> 00:20:57,009 [chuckles] 398 00:20:57,029 --> 00:20:59,079 (Philip) 'Hold the elevator.' 399 00:21:06,240 --> 00:21:08,269 - Uh-oh. - Going down. 400 00:21:08,289 --> 00:21:10,230 (Will) 'Oh, no, no!' 401 00:21:12,140 --> 00:21:15,019 'No!' 402 00:21:18,089 --> 00:21:20,069 Tsk. My poor baby. 403 00:21:20,089 --> 00:21:21,220 Your whole life must have flashed 404 00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:23,170 before your eyes. 405 00:21:25,220 --> 00:21:27,200 - Kiss me. - I'd love to. 406 00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:34,089 Hello. 407 00:21:37,180 --> 00:21:39,009 [chuckles] 408 00:21:49,250 --> 00:21:51,170 Hmm. 409 00:21:51,190 --> 00:21:53,029 Not really. 410 00:21:53,049 --> 00:21:55,019 All I could think about was you. 411 00:21:55,039 --> 00:21:58,230 - Aww. - Hm. Mmm. 412 00:21:59,190 --> 00:22:02,049 [instrumental music] 413 00:22:04,079 --> 00:22:06,049 [theme music] 414 00:22:06,259 --> 00:22:08,140 ♪ Yeah ♪ 415 00:22:11,150 --> 00:22:13,029 ♪ Yeah ♪ 416 00:22:16,009 --> 00:22:17,190 ♪ Yeah ♪ 417 00:22:20,220 --> 00:22:22,019 ♪ Yeah ♪ 418 00:22:25,140 --> 00:22:26,259 ♪ Yeah ♪ 419 00:22:30,049 --> 00:22:31,140 ♪ Yeah ♪♪