[Lisa chuckles]
Oh, "Casablanca" always makes me cry.
Oh, good. I thought it was me.
No. Will, I really had a good time tonight.
Yeah, me too.
Look, um, Lisa, don't take this the wrong way.
- What? - Can I..
Can I see you..
Can you see me what?
Can I see you..
...again?
[chuckles]
You want another date?
- Sure. - Cool.
Phew!
You know, I-I ain't talkin' about marriage
'or nothing, though.'
[theme song]
♪ Now this is a story all about ♪
♪ How my life got flipped turned upside down ♪
♪ And I'd like to take a minute just sit right there ♪
♪ I'll tell you how I became the prince ♪
♪ Of a town called Bel-Air ♪
[instrumental music]
♪ In West Philadelphia born and raised ♪
♪ On the playground is where I spent most of my days ♪
♪ Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool ♪
♪ And all shootin' some b-ball outside of the school ♪
♪ When a couple of guys who were up to no good ♪
♪ Started makin' trouble in my neighborhood ♪
♪ I got in one little fight and my mom got scared and said ♪
♪ You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air ♪
♪ I whistled for a cab and when it came near ♪
♪ The license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror ♪
♪ If anything I could say that this cab was rare ♪
♪ But I thought nah forget it yo homes to Bel-Air ♪
♪ I pulled up to the house about seven or eight ♪
♪ And I yelled to the cabbie yo homes smell you later ♪
♪ I looked at my kingdom I was finally there ♪
♪ To sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel-Air ♪
[music continues]
- Thanks, daddy. - You're welcome, sweetheart.
Everybody clear about their duties at the carnival tonight?
Yes. I'll be manning the Guess Your Birthday booth.
Oh, do me, do me.
Hilary, you're August 18th.
Wow, you are good.
(Carlton) Hurry, hurry, hurry.
Step right up. Step right up.
Come see the amazing Rock Dwarfsky..
...the world's shortest square-headed negro.
(Carlton) Hey!
Someone to see you, Master William.
It's a girl. Heh-heh. Heh-heh.
(Will) Oh, hey, Lisa, what's up, baby? What you doin' here?
You left your book at the library.
What was he doing there?
Uh, Lisa, this is my family.
Family, this is my Lisa.
- Hi. - 'Hi.'
- Would you like some breakfast? - Oh, no, thank you.
I have to run to work
but it was nice to meet you all.
- Well, same here. - Nice meeting you too.
Uh, hey, uh, so we gonna hook up later at the bowling alley?
Oh, yeah.
- Alright. - Alright.
- See you later. - Alright.
What?
I've seen this look before. The facial flush.
The flare in his nostrils.
Look at his eyes.
Alright. Well, I'm saying, yeah, you know, I-I like her.
Will has a girlfriend! Will has a girlfriend!
L-l-look, we choose not to define our relationship.
Well, whatever, Lisa has it all.
Intelligence, great dresser, nice body.
God, I'm lonely.
[instrumental music]
I wonder why you don't see a lot of black professional bowlers.
Ain't no money in it. Look..
How much dough could a brother make endorsin' a pair of these?
It'd be like, "Hi, I'm Darnell Washington, pro bowler.
"Whenever I'm about to roll me a 300 game
I like do it in these. Air ghettos."
- Will, you are so silly. - Well, you know, I try.
Come here, let me help you with that.
Alright. Uh..
Not too tight.
Oh, uh, ladies first.
Oh, okay. Let's do this.
[in a nasal voice] Lisa Wilkes is about to step up to the lane.
[in a normal voice] Your form look good from here.
Whoo! A strike. I'm in the house.
Hey. Hey. Hey.
Girl, you just won yourself a date to a carnival
with an ebonyGod.
Really? I'd rather go with you.
[chuckles] Look out, girl, it's Darnell's turn now.
Go, Darnell.
[grunts]
[grunting]
[skittles crashing]
[no audio]
Uh, excuse me, Dark Gable.
In case you didn't notice, this is my date.
- I told him. - Say, baby..
Why don't you ditch the go-cart and step up to a stretched limo?
Um, excuse me, Messy Snipes? Um..
Listen, uh, why don't you just take your limo
and ease on up out my face, alright?
Ooh, no, you didn't. No, you didn't.
Will. Will, just let it go.
No, no, baby. He started this, now I'm gonna finish it.
[grunts]
[man grunts]
Lisa just saved your butt.
Get off, get off.
Where did that come from?
Will, I've been meaning to tell you that I'm a--
A what? A Power Ranger?
[sighs] I've studied a couple years of self-defense.
- Did I do something wrong? - Yes, you did!
I was just about to retaliate.
Baby, you were on the floor.
Well, that's how I fight.
Officer, officer, it was him.
[people clamoring]
Alright, it's no big deal, Will. Let's just get back to bowling.
Yeah, fine. Yeah, let's get back to bowling.
Alright.
[grunts]
That one ain't counted.
(Carlton) 'Step right up! Step right up!'
Test your accuracy. You, sir, with the big ears.
How about testing your skills?
Come on, it's only three throws..
Hey. Aunt Viv, where's the rest of the family?
Well, Ashley's showing Nicky around
and your uncle's in a pie-eating contest.
- How'd you do, honey? - Piece of cake.
Come on, baby, let me buy you a hot dog.
- Hey. - See you later.
- You, sir, how about a throw? - I don't think I should.
(Carlton) What's the matter?
Got a noodle for an arm?
Carlton, that's Ken Griffey Jr., man.
Tell you what, since Will seems to know you
how about a throw for half the price?
Alright.
Who's he?
He is just one of the highest paid players in baseball.
Hilary, this guy makes, like, a quadrillion dollars a year.
- Hi, quarterback. - How you doin'?
I'm kind of chilly. Wanna take me to Hawaii?
Sorry, I'm married.
Then stop flirting with me.
- Hey. Ken, what's up, man? - What's up?
Looks like that strike took a toll on your throwin' arm, huh?
At least I don't have my woman fightin' my battles for me.
[laughs]
Hey, Lisa. What are you doin' here?
You invited me, remember?
Well, yeah, you know, but that was before the incident.
Will, you shouldn't be threatened
by my knowledge of Shotokan.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, first of all, I don't care
if you know Chaka Khan. I ain't threatened by nobody.
- Will, why don't-- - Y-y-y-you know what?
I'mma just go get me a little somethin' to drink, alright?
What's wrong with Will?
Carlton, can I confide in you?
I feel it too, Lisa.
Feel what?
Never mind.
Can't believe, this place is so crowded
I can't even get a soda.
Will, it's a carnival, relax.
Listen, let's go and play a game.
You can win me a stuffed animal.
Oh, why? So you can beat the stuffing out of it?
Lisa, I'm tellin' you, I had that guy.
- Will. - Had him!
Will, I was only trying to help.
Well, you know, if you wanted to help, you should've
let that fellow bash my face in.
Now that would have been helpful.
Now, let me get this straight.
You'd rather a guy bash your face in
than to have a woman who likes this face..
...step in and save it?
Finally you understand.
Yeah, I think I do.
- I'm leaving. - Whoa, hey, hey, Lisa.
Nothing.
[instrumental music]
[telephone ringing]
Banks' residence.
Oh, one moment, please, I'll check. Miss Lisa on the phone.
Oh, G, look, um, just tell her I'm at the store.
He says, he's at the store.
Yes, I'll tell him you called.
Will, I think it's inexcusable what that friend
Lisa of yours did yesterday.
Thank you, Hilary, finally somebody
who understands my side of it.
Of course I do.
If I was with a wimp who couldn't defend himself
I'd just leave.
You know what? That's it.
I'm puttin' an end to this mess right now.
[instrumental music]
Hello? Mr. Yoshi?
Yiki, yo, Yoshi?
Hey. Uncle Phil, what you doin' here?
[exhales]
[screams]
[groans]
[grunts]
[groans]
[grunting]
[exhales sharply]
[in Chinese accent] Chan, you have offended my family.
Now I must avenge my brother'sdeath.
- Having fun? - Oh.
Yeah, oh, uh, sorry. Listen, I-I was just--
That's okay, everybody likes to do that.
What the heck happened to my coffee table?
Oh, uh, uh, sorry about that. Hey, I-I'm Will Smith.
I-I come to learn karate from the greatest most revered master
the martial arts world has ever known.
Oh, well, I--
Listen, man, I wanna be just like Steven Seagal.
Oh, you wanna be a bad actor?
Yes, I can teach you the art of self-defense.
But first, you must learn the Japanese philosophies
patience, discipline. Hmm?
Yeah, that's cool and everything, but can we hurry
it up? I gotta whup somebody's butt quick.
- Please s-sit. - Oh.
Now, once upon a time
there was a great Samurai warrior
named Akira Yoshimora.
Ooh. Good story.
Hey, man, listen, can you teach me that thing
where you ram somebody's nose up into their brain?
Akira's quest in life was to slay the most feared dragon
in order to prove his worth as a warrior.
'But he never found the dragon.'
And on his deathbed, he finally realized
that his search was pointless..
...for the most feared dragon was within, not without.
Without what?
I see symbolism is not one of your strong points.
But-but let me try again.
The silkworm is a very
fastidious little creature.
[indistinct chatter]
And then by the time the silkworm made it to Tibet
I was done with him.
Your situation reminds me of the one Theotis Jones was in.
Theotis Jones?
Yeah, his woman rescued his butt in some fight
just like yours did.
Well, what did he do?
Last I heard, he was playing Diana Ross
in"La Cage Aux Folles."
So, what am I supposed to do, Jazz?
Only one thing to do.
I give you the "Hoodlum Pages."
Let's see.
Counterfeiters, extortionists..
...car salesmen.
Ah, here it is. Guys who take dives.
Wait, give me this. Wait a minute.
This guy will let me punch him ten times for 40 dollars?
Mention this ad, and he'll throw in a head butt.
Okay, so dude comes down to the peacock
he kicks up a little static, I lay him down.
Lisa and everybody thinks I'm a hero.Ahh.
Hey, man, where'd you get this from anyway?
I stole it.
[instrumental music]
Will. I'm glad you finally decided to call me.
Oh, yeah, you know, I-I figured we needed
to, you know, to talk about what happened.
- Yeah, definitely. - Yeah.
[sighs] Um, go ahead.
- What? - Talk.
Oh, pfft, oh, yeah, I'm sorry. Uh, yeah, listen.
Um, maybe we should just have a cappuccino first, you know.
Just to-to warm up to our conversation.
- Sure. - Alright.
(Lisa) Oh! Ooh!
Hey, man, who you shov..
Alright, this is a stickup. Everyone on the floor!
[screams]
(male #1) 'Don't anyone try to be a hero.'
Let's have the cash, Webster.
Fine, take the money. But then what?
Holed up in some fleabag motel waiting for the man
to come and take you away.
And all that's left is to walk that last long, lonely mile
with the Lord's prayer--
Will you give the man the damn money?
[cash register chimes]
Alright, get down. Don't you move.
- Alright, it's showtime. - What?
Alright, buddy, you ain't goin' nowhere.
Will, don't be a fool.
I'm warning you, pal, this thing is loaded.
Hey, look, point it right at me. Make it look real.
Huh?
[yelling]
[Will grunting]
[grunting]
I said, "Hyah!"
Thank you, thank you.
Lisa, come stand by my side.
Will, that was the most foolishthing I've ever seen.
You could've been killed.
- No, but, baby, baby-- - No!
Jazz, you can take your fake cop. Lisa left.
Will, he's real.
And so is he.
And all that for only 40 bucks?
[instrumental music]
Hey, Uncle Phil, what's up, man? You busy?
Yes, I am.
Uh, listen, Uncle Phil, I've been actingrealdumb.
Mm-hmm.
Look, I know what you thinking, what's new?
But, usually I know why I'd be tripping, man
but this time, I don't have no clue.
This is about you and Lisa, isn't it?
Sit down, Will.
You know, ever since the dawn of civilization
man has tried to be the stronger of the species.
The hunter, the protector.
Have you taken any anthropology classes?
Oh, no, but I seen the "Flintstones," like, five times.
Anyway, let me update this for you.
Say a stranger asks you for directions.
Now, you don't know where it is, but do you say that? No.
You say, "Go down three blocks, make a left, you can't miss it."
Yeah. I got plenty of dudes out there still lookin' for places.
Same guy asks a woman.
Now, she doesn't know either.
- But she says, "I don't know." - Pfft.
That's the difference between men and women.
Oh, wait, wait, wait, Uncle Phil.
I mean, what is it that makes men act like that?
Uh, it's testosterone, the male hormone.
And women don't have testosterone?
Well-well, I-I believe they do
but theirs is, uh, dormant most of the time.
- Excuse me. - Wait, wait.
Uncle Phil, hold on.
You don't know the answer to none of these questions
I'm asking you, do you?
No, I guess I don't.
Then why didn't you just say so?
Because I'm a man.
[scoffs]
[instrumental music]
Hey, thanks a lot, Carlton.
Hey, Lisa.
Shouldn't you be out fighting crime?
Listen, can I sit down?
No, Will, I don't think so. You're too crazy for me.
No, I'm crazy about you. There's a difference.
Look, Lisa, that's the only reason
I had that guy fake stickin' up the place.
Only a real robber came in, I thought it was the setup dude
otherwise, I'd have been up under the table with you.
Will, what exactly were you trying to accomplish?
- Honestly? - Yes, please tell me.
I was trying to fight Akira's dragon.
Only the dragon was from without.
Without what?
That's the same place the whole thing fell apart for me too.
Look, Lisa, I think I could be cool with you
being able to kick butt all over the city.
But I got a feeling, you got some other strengths too.
And, you know, tha-that's the part that kind of scares me.
Will, just because I'm strong, it doesn't make you weak.
- I ain't never said I was weak. - No.
Look, why don't we just think of ourselves as being equals?
Cool, but, you know, if we had the same job
I'mma still make more money.
[both chuckle]
Will you just shut up and kiss me?
Yes.
Get a room!
[instrumental music]
(male narrator) Y'all, stay tuned for more "Fresh Prince."
[theme music]
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ Yeah ♪♪