1 00:00:01,800 --> 00:00:03,955 - Sir? - Oh, it's delicious. 2 00:00:03,975 --> 00:00:07,870 - Should eat some first. - 'It's about time.' 3 00:00:07,890 --> 00:00:11,957 Sir, I hate to disturb you during feeding time 4 00:00:11,978 --> 00:00:14,973 but there's a man snooping around the premises. 5 00:00:16,186 --> 00:00:19,018 Daddy, call the police. 6 00:00:19,039 --> 00:00:21,022 - I'll handle this. - No, no, no, no. 7 00:00:21,042 --> 00:00:22,307 I got this one, Uncle Phil. 8 00:00:25,080 --> 00:00:26,274 What are you doing in our backyard, man? 9 00:00:26,294 --> 00:00:29,319 Oh, my God. Uncle Phil, he's got a.. 10 00:00:29,338 --> 00:00:31,341 ...business card! 11 00:00:31,362 --> 00:00:34,407 Sorry, if I startled anyone. Nobody answered the front door. 12 00:00:34,428 --> 00:00:37,311 - I'm a realtor. Ron Reed. - Oh. How are you? 13 00:00:37,331 --> 00:00:38,484 Now that still doesn't give you the right 14 00:00:38,505 --> 00:00:40,397 to go traipsing around our property. 15 00:00:40,417 --> 00:00:41,551 But I've got a client who's prepared to make 16 00:00:42,278 --> 00:00:43,482 a very generous offer on this house. 17 00:00:43,502 --> 00:00:48,348 Well, then come in, Ron. It is Ron, isn't it? 18 00:00:48,370 --> 00:00:51,607 Sit down. Take a load off, yes. 19 00:00:51,627 --> 00:00:53,651 Care for some salmon? 20 00:00:53,671 --> 00:00:55,522 Carlton! 21 00:00:57,595 --> 00:00:59,477 What kind of offer, Mr. Reed? 22 00:00:59,499 --> 00:01:00,682 Well above market value. 23 00:01:00,701 --> 00:01:02,755 My client wants to buy it for his nephew. 24 00:01:02,776 --> 00:01:04,739 This house is not for sale. 25 00:01:04,759 --> 00:01:07,633 - How much? - Shut up, Carlton. 26 00:01:07,653 --> 00:01:09,828 Mr. and Mrs. Banks, if you'll hear me out. 27 00:01:09,848 --> 00:01:12,752 You see, my client's nephew grew up in this house in the 50's 28 00:01:12,772 --> 00:01:15,858 and he'd like to repurchase it for sentimental reasons. 29 00:01:15,877 --> 00:01:16,859 How much? 30 00:01:16,880 --> 00:01:18,913 (all) Shut up, Carlton! 31 00:01:21,766 --> 00:01:23,850 Hey, Uncle Phil, man 32 00:01:23,871 --> 00:01:24,974 you're not really going to consider 33 00:01:24,994 --> 00:01:26,947 selling this house, are you? 34 00:01:26,967 --> 00:01:30,032 Come on. This place is special to us. 35 00:01:30,053 --> 00:01:33,907 I'm authorized to bid a half million dollars 36 00:01:33,927 --> 00:01:35,081 above fair market value. 37 00:01:35,100 --> 00:01:38,022 I'm going to pack my stuff, alright? 38 00:01:38,043 --> 00:01:40,062 [theme music] 39 00:01:40,081 --> 00:01:41,176 ♪ Now this is a story ♪ 40 00:01:41,197 --> 00:01:43,266 ♪ All about how my life got flipped ♪ 41 00:01:43,287 --> 00:01:46,097 ♪ Turned upside-down and I'd like to take a minute ♪ 42 00:01:46,117 --> 00:01:48,278 ♪ Just sit right there I'll tell you how I became the prince ♪ 43 00:01:48,298 --> 00:01:50,317 ♪ Of a town called Bel-Air ♪ 44 00:01:59,255 --> 00:02:01,466 ♪ In West Philadelphia born and raised ♪ 45 00:02:01,487 --> 00:02:04,408 ♪ On the playground is where I spent most of my days ♪ 46 00:02:04,427 --> 00:02:06,436 ♪ Chillin' out maxin' relaxing all cool ♪ 47 00:02:06,456 --> 00:02:08,617 ♪ And all shootin' some b-ball outside of the school ♪ 48 00:02:08,638 --> 00:02:11,550 ♪ When a couple of guys who were up to no good ♪ 49 00:02:11,569 --> 00:02:13,557 ♪ Started makin' trouble in my neighborhood ♪ 50 00:02:13,579 --> 00:02:15,719 ♪ I got in one little fight and my mom got scared ♪ 51 00:02:15,739 --> 00:02:17,596 ♪ And said you're moving with your auntie ♪ 52 00:02:17,615 --> 00:02:18,660 ♪ And uncle in Bel-Air ♪ 53 00:02:18,681 --> 00:02:19,675 ♪ I whistled for a cab ♪ 54 00:02:19,696 --> 00:02:20,741 ♪ And when it came near ♪ 55 00:02:20,760 --> 00:02:22,566 ♪ The license plate said fresh ♪ 56 00:02:22,587 --> 00:02:23,682 ♪ And it had dice in the mirror ♪ 57 00:02:23,702 --> 00:02:24,726 ♪ If anything I can say ♪ 58 00:02:24,747 --> 00:02:25,781 ♪ That this cab was rare ♪ 59 00:02:25,802 --> 00:02:26,836 ♪ But I thought nah forget it ♪ 60 00:02:26,858 --> 00:02:29,759 ♪ Yo homes to Bel-Air ♪ 61 00:02:29,779 --> 00:02:32,833 ♪ I pulled up to a house about seven or eight ♪ 62 00:02:32,853 --> 00:02:35,825 ♪ And I yelled to the cabbie yo homes smell you later ♪ 63 00:02:35,845 --> 00:02:37,955 ♪ I looked at my kingdom I was finally there ♪ 64 00:02:37,975 --> 00:02:40,978 ♪ To sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air ♪♪ 65 00:02:48,100 --> 00:02:49,957 (Philip) 'It's kind of tempting, huh?' 66 00:02:49,977 --> 00:02:52,993 Especially with real estate market being so soft. 67 00:02:53,012 --> 00:02:55,039 Am I the only one who doesn't think 68 00:02:55,060 --> 00:02:57,177 making money is always the bottom line? 69 00:02:57,196 --> 00:02:59,982 Let's hope so. 70 00:03:00,002 --> 00:03:01,919 Very funny, Carlton. 71 00:03:01,939 --> 00:03:03,946 Look, some stranger wants to buy this house 72 00:03:03,966 --> 00:03:05,184 for sentimental reasons. 73 00:03:05,903 --> 00:03:07,181 What about our sentimental reasons? 74 00:03:07,900 --> 00:03:09,118 We love this house. 75 00:03:09,139 --> 00:03:11,156 You know, I mean, I think Ashley's right. 76 00:03:11,175 --> 00:03:14,930 I mean, this place has got a lot of memories. 77 00:03:14,950 --> 00:03:18,914 Living here has been almost a religious experience. 78 00:03:18,935 --> 00:03:20,053 You know, my father would kill me 79 00:03:20,072 --> 00:03:22,060 if he knew I was out with a boy tonight. 80 00:03:22,080 --> 00:03:25,026 I told him I was going to church. 81 00:03:27,092 --> 00:03:29,868 The Lord is good. 82 00:03:32,075 --> 00:03:34,911 Why don't you come on over here, sit down and relax a little bit? 83 00:03:34,931 --> 00:03:36,848 Okay. 84 00:03:36,869 --> 00:03:38,107 Ahem. 85 00:03:38,127 --> 00:03:40,973 [instrumental music] 86 00:03:43,050 --> 00:03:45,057 [laughing] 87 00:03:47,902 --> 00:03:50,069 Boy, you are pretty slick, Will Smith. 88 00:03:50,089 --> 00:03:53,074 And I ain't even oiled up yet, you know? 89 00:03:55,102 --> 00:03:57,878 Hey, hey, you know what? 90 00:03:57,897 --> 00:03:59,016 You can sell the house. 91 00:03:59,036 --> 00:04:01,093 It's the couch that got the memories. 92 00:04:02,980 --> 00:04:04,927 And the jacuzzi. 93 00:04:06,885 --> 00:04:08,063 Carlton's little typewriting table. 94 00:04:08,083 --> 00:04:09,931 Hey! 95 00:04:11,039 --> 00:04:13,995 Look, kids, this is serious. 96 00:04:14,014 --> 00:04:15,831 What should we do, Philip? 97 00:04:15,852 --> 00:04:18,808 I can't imagine living someplace else. 98 00:04:18,828 --> 00:04:19,946 This is where we raised our children 99 00:04:19,966 --> 00:04:22,822 and taught them to be responsible adults. 100 00:04:22,842 --> 00:04:23,990 Here, Hilary, you take it out. 101 00:04:24,010 --> 00:04:26,776 - Out where? - To the trash cans. 102 00:04:26,795 --> 00:04:29,990 You know, those things you hit every time you back out the car. 103 00:04:30,011 --> 00:04:33,037 Thank God! I thought it was the neighbor's kids. 104 00:04:33,057 --> 00:04:34,934 Ow! This is gross! 105 00:04:34,953 --> 00:04:38,808 I don't touch greasy, disgusting things. 106 00:04:38,828 --> 00:04:41,044 Just pretend it's buying you dinner afterwards. 107 00:04:45,749 --> 00:04:46,947 - You take it. - Girl! 108 00:04:46,967 --> 00:04:49,863 And for your information, dinner comes first. 109 00:04:50,940 --> 00:04:52,737 Oh, it's like that, right? 110 00:04:52,757 --> 00:04:54,734 You're just gonna slam garbage at me. 111 00:04:54,754 --> 00:04:55,933 Good morning, Will. 112 00:04:55,954 --> 00:04:57,791 Good morning, Uncle Phil. Here's your lunch. 113 00:04:57,810 --> 00:04:58,948 Thank you. 114 00:04:58,969 --> 00:05:02,734 We all knew that Ashley was, well, cute. 115 00:05:02,753 --> 00:05:05,948 But with my help, she has turned into an absolute knockout. 116 00:05:05,969 --> 00:05:09,823 So it gives me great pleasure to present 117 00:05:09,842 --> 00:05:12,858 the new Ashley Banks. 118 00:05:17,812 --> 00:05:20,718 Well, isn't she the most gorgeous creature 119 00:05:20,738 --> 00:05:21,886 you've ever seen? 120 00:05:21,905 --> 00:05:24,950 Ashley sweetheart, are you comfortable dressed like this? 121 00:05:24,970 --> 00:05:27,926 Well, daddy, it all comes down to what Robert thinks-- 122 00:05:27,946 --> 00:05:31,790 Ashley, aren't we forgetting something? 123 00:05:37,922 --> 00:05:40,818 He's so in tune with my needs. 124 00:05:40,838 --> 00:05:44,683 It was amazing and endless and magnificent. 125 00:05:44,703 --> 00:05:46,720 I think I saw God. 126 00:05:48,726 --> 00:05:49,864 [screaming] 127 00:05:51,902 --> 00:05:54,878 - Stand up. - We're sorry. 128 00:05:54,898 --> 00:05:58,872 I fell. I fell. I fell. I fell. 129 00:05:58,892 --> 00:06:00,639 You'd think in a house this big 130 00:06:00,658 --> 00:06:02,775 a fella would get a little privacy. 131 00:06:02,796 --> 00:06:04,634 Or stronger doors. 132 00:06:05,792 --> 00:06:09,666 Whatever. I still think we shouldn't sell this house. 133 00:06:09,686 --> 00:06:10,795 It's home. 134 00:06:10,814 --> 00:06:12,831 Now, Ashley, this house obviously means 135 00:06:12,852 --> 00:06:14,659 a lot to all of us 136 00:06:14,679 --> 00:06:16,616 but you don't get an offer like this every day. 137 00:06:16,635 --> 00:06:18,712 I'm gonna have to give it some real consideration. 138 00:06:18,733 --> 00:06:20,714 Excuse me? 139 00:06:20,734 --> 00:06:22,815 I mean, your mother and I will have to give it some 140 00:06:22,835 --> 00:06:25,816 real consideration, isn't that right, sweetheart? 141 00:06:25,836 --> 00:06:26,807 Dear? 142 00:06:26,826 --> 00:06:28,767 [instrumental music] 143 00:06:28,788 --> 00:06:30,819 Man, if we end up moving into another guest house 144 00:06:30,839 --> 00:06:32,729 I'm getting the bedroom this time. 145 00:06:32,748 --> 00:06:34,619 Not so fast, buster! 146 00:06:34,639 --> 00:06:37,731 Who knows if the new place is even gonna have a guest house? 147 00:06:37,751 --> 00:06:41,722 Uh, don't worry, we'll bring a shoe box you can sleep in. 148 00:06:41,743 --> 00:06:44,695 Listen, my friend, I haven't exactly gotten a kick 149 00:06:44,715 --> 00:06:46,686 out of being your roommate either. 150 00:06:46,705 --> 00:06:48,886 I mean, I can't imagine anything more irritating 151 00:06:48,906 --> 00:06:51,637 than sharing a pool house with you. 152 00:06:51,657 --> 00:06:55,649 Oh, I can. How about sharing a jail cell with you? 153 00:06:56,889 --> 00:06:59,841 Come on, man, let it go. You'll feel better. 154 00:06:59,862 --> 00:07:02,893 ♪ Let my people go ♪ 155 00:07:02,912 --> 00:07:07,734 ♪ Oppressed so hard they could not stand ♪ 156 00:07:07,755 --> 00:07:09,916 ♪ Let my people go ♪ 157 00:07:11,706 --> 00:07:15,868 ♪ Go down Moses ♪ 158 00:07:15,889 --> 00:07:19,701 ♪ Way down in Egypt land ♪ 159 00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:21,811 ♪ Tell old pharaoh ♪ 160 00:07:21,831 --> 00:07:26,693 ♪ Let my people go ♪♪ 161 00:07:29,724 --> 00:07:31,815 Yeah, well, that whole fiasco was your fault. 162 00:07:31,835 --> 00:07:33,936 You're totally immature. 163 00:07:37,718 --> 00:07:38,899 I'm immature? 164 00:07:38,919 --> 00:07:42,700 Well, isn't that the munchkin calling the midget short? 165 00:07:46,792 --> 00:07:47,833 Oh, what a night! 166 00:07:47,853 --> 00:07:50,774 I made a killing. 26 milky ways. 167 00:07:50,794 --> 00:07:53,745 And the democrats say there's a recession. 168 00:07:54,767 --> 00:07:56,788 What are you supposed to be? 169 00:07:56,807 --> 00:07:58,848 My idol, Macaulay Culkin. 170 00:08:00,939 --> 00:08:02,789 And you know why he's my idol? 171 00:08:02,809 --> 00:08:05,691 Why? 'Cause y'all the same height? 172 00:08:05,712 --> 00:08:06,952 How dare you two defy me? 173 00:08:07,672 --> 00:08:08,942 Now, see here, big guy. 174 00:08:09,664 --> 00:08:10,814 [air hissing] 175 00:08:14,755 --> 00:08:16,756 Oh, my God! Howard! 176 00:08:18,747 --> 00:08:21,748 And to think I laid out 50 big ones on your damn cake. 177 00:08:21,769 --> 00:08:23,960 Not just any cake, I got you that really, really neat one 178 00:08:24,679 --> 00:08:25,960 in the commercials, you know the one that goes.. 179 00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:28,861 ♪ Sonny the seal your timing's a squeal ♪ 180 00:08:28,881 --> 00:08:30,952 ♪ 49.95 oh what a deal ♪ 181 00:08:31,674 --> 00:08:32,844 ♪ It's sonny.. ♪♪ 182 00:08:32,863 --> 00:08:34,764 Carlton! Carlton! 183 00:08:36,705 --> 00:08:37,875 Come to think of it, I don't know how I've been 184 00:08:37,896 --> 00:08:39,777 around you this long. 185 00:08:39,797 --> 00:08:41,898 What's wrong with being around me? 186 00:08:41,918 --> 00:08:43,719 Oh, well, how about 187 00:08:43,738 --> 00:08:47,770 "I'll take always embarrassing me for 500, Alex?" 188 00:08:47,791 --> 00:08:50,742 What have I ever done to embarrass you? 189 00:08:50,762 --> 00:08:52,783 Oh, well, you, you gotta few days? 190 00:08:53,804 --> 00:08:55,825 You really think we made it? 191 00:08:55,844 --> 00:08:58,695 Look, man, whether we did or not, you hung in there. 192 00:08:58,715 --> 00:09:00,776 I'm proud of you. 193 00:09:00,797 --> 00:09:01,937 You're proud of me? 194 00:09:01,956 --> 00:09:05,688 You never said that to me before in my life. 195 00:09:05,708 --> 00:09:07,839 Give me a hug. 196 00:09:07,859 --> 00:09:10,950 You see, man? That's exactly why I never tell you nothing. 197 00:09:16,953 --> 00:09:18,984 Go ahead. Go ahead. Go ahead. 198 00:09:19,704 --> 00:09:20,955 Admit it, Will. You care about me. 199 00:09:20,975 --> 00:09:23,776 I do not. 200 00:09:23,797 --> 00:09:26,809 Yes, you do. You like me. You like having me around. 201 00:09:26,828 --> 00:09:28,699 Carlton, take it back, man. 202 00:09:28,719 --> 00:09:30,809 Face it. 203 00:09:30,829 --> 00:09:32,900 Just got to face it. 204 00:09:32,921 --> 00:09:34,742 You love me. 205 00:09:35,972 --> 00:09:37,843 Alright, that was a bad example. 206 00:09:37,863 --> 00:09:41,774 You're not so much of an embarrassment. 207 00:09:41,795 --> 00:09:43,966 Apology accepted. 208 00:09:43,985 --> 00:09:47,907 Hey, come on. See, man. Damn. 209 00:09:47,928 --> 00:09:49,879 [instrumental music] 210 00:09:50,930 --> 00:09:53,921 So, after careful consideration 211 00:09:53,941 --> 00:09:55,832 we've decided not to sell. 212 00:09:55,851 --> 00:09:57,862 - Oh, daddy! - Oh, man! 213 00:09:57,882 --> 00:10:00,963 When it came down to it we just couldn't part with this place. 214 00:10:00,983 --> 00:10:02,864 I mean, in the final analysis 215 00:10:02,884 --> 00:10:04,725 there are more important things than money. 216 00:10:04,745 --> 00:10:05,935 Would everyone stop saying that? 217 00:10:05,956 --> 00:10:08,918 I'm getting a migraine! 218 00:10:08,938 --> 00:10:12,880 We got some baby tylenol in the kitchen. 219 00:10:12,899 --> 00:10:15,880 [telephone ringing] 220 00:10:15,900 --> 00:10:18,004 Hello. Ah! Ron! 221 00:10:18,024 --> 00:10:19,896 Yeah, I was just going to call you. 222 00:10:19,916 --> 00:10:21,869 Uh, look, we've talked it over 223 00:10:21,889 --> 00:10:24,929 and we've decided not to sell. 224 00:10:24,949 --> 00:10:27,053 No. I don't think there's anything you could say to me 225 00:10:27,073 --> 00:10:29,961 that could change.. 226 00:10:29,982 --> 00:10:32,035 What's that? You're kidding. 227 00:10:32,056 --> 00:10:34,925 Could you hold on for a minute, please? Thank you. 228 00:10:34,945 --> 00:10:36,968 Philip, what's going on? 229 00:10:36,987 --> 00:10:41,023 Ron said that his buyer is willing to go $1 million 230 00:10:41,044 --> 00:10:43,016 above market value. 231 00:10:43,036 --> 00:10:46,026 - Whoa! - Aah! 232 00:10:46,046 --> 00:10:48,049 [screaming] 233 00:10:48,069 --> 00:10:50,978 Yes, there is a God! 234 00:10:50,998 --> 00:10:52,991 Look at you all! 235 00:10:53,988 --> 00:10:56,212 Will, say something. 236 00:10:56,233 --> 00:10:58,226 Ching! Ching! 237 00:10:59,292 --> 00:11:01,285 [indistinct chatter] 238 00:11:04,235 --> 00:11:06,218 Okay. Thank you very much. Bye-bye. 239 00:11:06,238 --> 00:11:08,181 That was Ron. The buyer is flying 240 00:11:08,200 --> 00:11:09,247 this evening from New York. 241 00:11:09,268 --> 00:11:11,331 [indistinct cheering] 242 00:11:11,351 --> 00:11:14,149 But I don't want to move! 243 00:11:14,170 --> 00:11:17,180 Whoa! Whoa! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! 244 00:11:17,200 --> 00:11:18,377 Hey, girl. 245 00:11:18,396 --> 00:11:22,171 Ashley, this is $1 million here. 246 00:11:22,191 --> 00:11:25,321 Now listen, uncle Phil will put that money in the bank, right 247 00:11:25,342 --> 00:11:28,271 and then start getting all kinds of crazy interest. 248 00:11:28,292 --> 00:11:31,321 Then it's bonds, then it's that T-bill stuff. 249 00:11:31,341 --> 00:11:32,448 And they got some certificates. 250 00:11:32,469 --> 00:11:34,422 And then-then, then junk be compounding. 251 00:11:34,442 --> 00:11:38,307 - What are you talking about? - I have no idea. 252 00:11:39,282 --> 00:11:40,339 Money! Money! Money! 253 00:11:40,360 --> 00:11:42,373 Is that all you people care about? 254 00:11:42,393 --> 00:11:44,396 I've been very happy in this house. 255 00:11:44,417 --> 00:11:47,426 A lot of exciting things have happened to me here. 256 00:11:47,445 --> 00:11:49,519 Ashley, you're 15 years old. 257 00:11:49,540 --> 00:11:52,529 How much excitement could you possibly have had? 258 00:11:52,550 --> 00:11:54,593 A lot more than you, Carlton. 259 00:11:56,504 --> 00:11:59,504 ♪ Happy birthday ♪ 260 00:11:59,524 --> 00:12:02,544 ♪ Dear Ashley ♪ 261 00:12:02,564 --> 00:12:06,489 ♪ Happy birthday ♪ 262 00:12:06,510 --> 00:12:09,560 ♪ To you ♪♪ 263 00:12:16,576 --> 00:12:18,579 Happy birthday, Ashley. 264 00:12:21,608 --> 00:12:25,786 I think I'd feel better if I could kiss you. 265 00:12:29,701 --> 00:12:31,795 I'm sorry. Is that terrible? 266 00:12:33,646 --> 00:12:35,659 No. 267 00:12:35,679 --> 00:12:38,719 Is it terrible that I want to kiss you back? 268 00:12:45,927 --> 00:12:47,930 Can I blow in your ear? 269 00:12:52,972 --> 00:12:55,026 Why? 270 00:12:55,045 --> 00:12:58,830 I don't know. I heard Will say it. 271 00:12:58,851 --> 00:13:00,974 Oh.. Okay. 272 00:13:02,927 --> 00:13:03,984 [blowing] 273 00:13:05,996 --> 00:13:10,002 Hey, Ashley, you ain't tell me that dude blew in your ear. 274 00:13:10,022 --> 00:13:12,881 Me, either. 275 00:13:12,901 --> 00:13:14,934 I, uh, embellished? 276 00:13:16,927 --> 00:13:19,977 Uncle Phil, I think you've more than made your opinion known 277 00:13:19,998 --> 00:13:22,001 to Ashley and her boyfriends. 278 00:13:22,021 --> 00:13:24,185 - Who do we have here? - We met at the mall. 279 00:13:24,205 --> 00:13:27,003 What's your name, son? 280 00:13:27,023 --> 00:13:28,180 This. 281 00:13:31,100 --> 00:13:34,150 This is a stick with a snake wrapped around it. 282 00:13:34,169 --> 00:13:36,203 It's a symbol, like prince. 283 00:13:36,224 --> 00:13:38,136 Prince who? 284 00:13:38,156 --> 00:13:41,297 See, that's exactly why fathers ain't allowed at the mall. 285 00:13:49,398 --> 00:13:51,341 Uh, what's this thing? 286 00:13:51,362 --> 00:13:55,197 It's a symbol, for "Get out of my house!" 287 00:13:57,160 --> 00:13:59,314 So I lost my temper once. Who hasn't? 288 00:13:59,333 --> 00:14:02,213 Excuse me. Once? 289 00:14:02,233 --> 00:14:04,253 Speaking as a lawyer, I can only say, that your daughter 290 00:14:04,274 --> 00:14:06,255 suits the criminal profile to a "T." 291 00:14:06,275 --> 00:14:08,245 Right down to the low, sloping forehead 292 00:14:08,265 --> 00:14:12,315 and the wide jaw suitable for grains and small rodents. 293 00:14:14,224 --> 00:14:16,364 I think you must have her confused with your mama. 294 00:14:17,444 --> 00:14:20,195 I don't want you to move out. 295 00:14:20,215 --> 00:14:22,175 Sorry, dad, I have to go. 296 00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:24,265 - No, you don't. - Will says I do. 297 00:14:24,286 --> 00:14:25,446 He says it's time for me to leave the nest 298 00:14:25,465 --> 00:14:29,195 become independent, and have sex with girls. 299 00:14:30,266 --> 00:14:34,187 Safe sex, mind you, but lots of it. 300 00:14:34,206 --> 00:14:35,466 Excuse me! 301 00:14:36,186 --> 00:14:37,266 Is this what you've been telling my boy.. 302 00:14:37,287 --> 00:14:39,317 - What? - That life is one big orgy? 303 00:14:39,336 --> 00:14:41,256 College is hard work, son 304 00:14:41,277 --> 00:14:43,337 followed by a family which is even more hard work. 305 00:14:43,356 --> 00:14:45,327 And a teenage daughter who doesn't wanna be seen with you 306 00:14:45,347 --> 00:14:47,437 in public and a wife, a wife who won't let you anywhere 307 00:14:47,457 --> 00:14:50,377 near her and a butler, a butler who may be the father 308 00:14:50,398 --> 00:14:51,458 of your child! 309 00:14:52,178 --> 00:14:54,208 Dad! Dad! 310 00:15:03,348 --> 00:15:05,188 You big-eared freeloader! 311 00:15:05,208 --> 00:15:06,448 You take your little square-headed cousin here 312 00:15:06,468 --> 00:15:09,239 and find Geoffrey, and you bring him back 313 00:15:09,260 --> 00:15:10,440 or they'll never find your bodies. 314 00:15:10,459 --> 00:15:14,219 And I'm a judge. I can make it happen. 315 00:15:15,459 --> 00:15:19,179 Alright, alright, so I have an ugly side. 316 00:15:19,199 --> 00:15:21,369 And you could write "Goodyear" on it. 317 00:15:24,271 --> 00:15:26,181 The more I think about it, I won't mind 318 00:15:26,200 --> 00:15:27,330 saying goodbye to this place at all. 319 00:15:27,350 --> 00:15:29,340 I mean, I've experienced the greatest tragedies 320 00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:31,300 of my life here. 321 00:15:37,252 --> 00:15:40,202 Damn! 322 00:15:40,221 --> 00:15:42,191 'And-and I, I mean that' 323 00:15:42,211 --> 00:15:45,301 in the nicest possible way, Hil. 324 00:15:45,321 --> 00:15:48,242 [grunts] 325 00:15:48,263 --> 00:15:50,383 I look like a troll doll! 326 00:15:51,413 --> 00:15:54,433 Look! There he goes. 327 00:15:54,452 --> 00:15:56,302 Hilary Banks.. 328 00:15:56,322 --> 00:15:58,452 Oh, yes, Trevor! 329 00:15:58,472 --> 00:16:01,403 (Trevor on TV) 'Will you marry me?' 330 00:16:01,424 --> 00:16:03,284 [splat] 331 00:16:25,365 --> 00:16:29,265 I ain't no bungee expert or nothing 332 00:16:29,286 --> 00:16:31,196 but I don't think he's supposed to be slamming 333 00:16:31,215 --> 00:16:32,265 into the ground like that. 334 00:16:32,286 --> 00:16:34,466 If I hadn't asked for a special proposal 335 00:16:35,186 --> 00:16:37,296 Trevor would be in my arms 336 00:16:37,315 --> 00:16:40,196 instead of in my purse. 337 00:16:42,476 --> 00:16:44,396 I love you, Trevor. 338 00:16:44,417 --> 00:16:46,277 [sobbing] 339 00:16:48,206 --> 00:16:51,227 Um...Hilary 340 00:16:51,247 --> 00:16:53,247 Trevor wasn't cremated. 341 00:16:56,337 --> 00:16:59,217 Ew! Then who's this? 342 00:17:02,418 --> 00:17:05,389 I'll see him to the door, Miss Hilary. 343 00:17:07,278 --> 00:17:10,348 I'm still not over that hair thing. 344 00:17:13,448 --> 00:17:16,329 Geoffrey, we're gonna need some more d'oeuvres tonight. 345 00:17:16,350 --> 00:17:17,390 What do we have in the house? 346 00:17:17,410 --> 00:17:20,320 Whatever he hasn't eaten. 347 00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:24,440 Geoffrey, for once, could you please cut the sarcasm? 348 00:17:24,459 --> 00:17:26,279 Sarcasm? 349 00:17:26,299 --> 00:17:28,470 Whatever do you mean? 350 00:17:29,191 --> 00:17:30,331 Geoffrey, go fetch my tools. 351 00:17:30,351 --> 00:17:32,411 You mean, your knife and fork? 352 00:17:35,210 --> 00:17:37,250 Jazz, to what do we owe your presence? 353 00:17:37,270 --> 00:17:39,350 My guess would be inbreeding. 354 00:17:40,401 --> 00:17:43,282 Sweetheart, it hasn't been that long 355 00:17:43,301 --> 00:17:46,231 since we've made love, has it? 356 00:17:46,251 --> 00:17:48,371 Five months this Tuesday. 357 00:17:50,261 --> 00:17:54,282 Why, that's just good-natured ribbing, sir 358 00:17:54,302 --> 00:17:58,272 unlike those ruthless barbs from Master William. 359 00:17:59,312 --> 00:18:00,292 Me? 360 00:18:00,312 --> 00:18:01,292 [snickers] 361 00:18:01,312 --> 00:18:03,222 [humming] 362 00:18:09,384 --> 00:18:12,454 Earthquake! 363 00:18:12,473 --> 00:18:14,393 (Philip) 'Man changed my life.' 364 00:18:14,414 --> 00:18:16,384 Turned a skinny little kid from South Carolina 365 00:18:16,404 --> 00:18:18,244 into the man you see before you today. 366 00:18:18,263 --> 00:18:21,354 And you know how? He challenged me. 367 00:18:21,375 --> 00:18:24,435 To what, a pie-eating contest? 368 00:18:24,454 --> 00:18:26,354 What is wrong with you people? 369 00:18:26,375 --> 00:18:29,335 I weigh the same thing I weighed in high school. 370 00:18:32,275 --> 00:18:34,465 Yeah, if you add up all four years. 371 00:18:36,376 --> 00:18:37,486 [laughing] 372 00:18:41,215 --> 00:18:43,465 Hey, hey, hey, man. 373 00:18:43,485 --> 00:18:48,216 Man, have I told you how thin you looking lately? 374 00:18:49,236 --> 00:18:52,316 Well, no, especially around your chins. 375 00:18:52,337 --> 00:18:55,277 I mean, um.. Damn. 376 00:18:55,296 --> 00:18:57,317 [instrumental music] 377 00:18:57,338 --> 00:18:58,458 [doorbell rings] 378 00:18:58,477 --> 00:19:00,277 That must be him. 379 00:19:00,297 --> 00:19:01,467 Now, we're doing the right thing, aren't we? 380 00:19:01,487 --> 00:19:03,277 We should sell. 381 00:19:03,297 --> 00:19:05,307 Oh, my God. She's buckling, dad! 382 00:19:05,328 --> 00:19:08,208 - Throw some cold water on her. - Carlton! 383 00:19:08,227 --> 00:19:10,368 Of course we're doing the right thing, sweetheart. 384 00:19:10,389 --> 00:19:13,279 Sir, it is my esteemed pleasure 385 00:19:13,298 --> 00:19:17,348 to introduce Mr. and Mrs. Donald Trump. 386 00:19:21,458 --> 00:19:26,329 It's the Donald! Oh, my God! 387 00:19:26,350 --> 00:19:28,320 [grunts] 388 00:19:28,340 --> 00:19:30,380 Mr. And Mrs. Trump, it's an honor to 389 00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:32,480 uh, to, um, to meet you. 390 00:19:35,310 --> 00:19:40,270 Well, Ron said his client had a rich uncle, but Donald Trump.. 391 00:19:40,290 --> 00:19:42,290 I like keeping a low profile. 392 00:19:43,371 --> 00:19:46,391 - Hi. Hilary Banks. - Hi, Hilary. 393 00:19:46,411 --> 00:19:49,412 You know, you look much richer in person. 394 00:19:52,301 --> 00:19:55,431 Hey, Mr. Trump. Hi. How you doing? Will Smith. 395 00:19:55,452 --> 00:19:58,382 Listen, you are getting a great house here 396 00:19:58,402 --> 00:20:02,303 and-and this is quite a deal you're getting for it, too. 397 00:20:02,322 --> 00:20:04,202 Let me you what, throw in another 50 grand 398 00:20:04,222 --> 00:20:07,362 I'll cut the grass for you every Saturday. 399 00:20:07,383 --> 00:20:10,293 Look, folks, before we go too far 400 00:20:10,312 --> 00:20:12,202 I've got something to tell you. 401 00:20:12,222 --> 00:20:15,343 Excuse me. But I've got something to tell you first. 402 00:20:15,364 --> 00:20:17,454 Thank you for ruining my life! 403 00:20:17,473 --> 00:20:21,253 - Ashley! - What did you do? 404 00:20:21,273 --> 00:20:25,203 Everybody's always blaming me for everything. 405 00:20:25,223 --> 00:20:27,264 Come on, let's sit down and sign some papers. 406 00:20:27,284 --> 00:20:31,204 Mr. Banks, there's been a little mistake. 407 00:20:31,224 --> 00:20:35,444 Mr. Trump's nephew grew up at 508 St. Cloud Road. 408 00:20:35,464 --> 00:20:40,455 And all this time, I thought our address was 805 St. Cloud Road. 409 00:20:40,475 --> 00:20:43,305 It is, Hilary. 410 00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:45,205 It's very embarrassing. 411 00:20:45,225 --> 00:20:46,345 Apparently, I inverted the numbers. 412 00:20:46,366 --> 00:20:48,326 I don't know what to say, except I'm sorry. 413 00:20:48,346 --> 00:20:51,257 That makes two of us. 414 00:20:51,276 --> 00:20:53,226 Well, that's business. 415 00:20:53,246 --> 00:20:54,376 Let's go down the street. 416 00:20:54,397 --> 00:20:57,317 I brought cash. It's quicker. 417 00:20:57,337 --> 00:20:58,457 Nice meeting you all. 418 00:20:58,476 --> 00:21:01,466 It's just too much of a fixer-upper. 419 00:21:03,378 --> 00:21:06,258 Vivian, Vivian, Vivian, Vivian. 420 00:21:06,277 --> 00:21:08,367 - No, no. No, no. - What.. 421 00:21:08,388 --> 00:21:10,258 What happened? 422 00:21:10,277 --> 00:21:12,307 Donald Trump walked in, and you passed out. 423 00:21:12,327 --> 00:21:15,377 Donald? Where is he? 424 00:21:15,398 --> 00:21:18,439 He'll be the guy carrying millions of dollars in cash. 425 00:21:18,459 --> 00:21:20,379 If you hurry up.. 426 00:21:25,399 --> 00:21:29,280 Oh, well, I guess this makes you very happy. 427 00:21:29,299 --> 00:21:32,229 And you are, too. Come on, admit it. 428 00:21:32,249 --> 00:21:34,379 Yes! We're staying! 429 00:21:34,400 --> 00:21:37,380 Yes, you know, it's probably for the best. 430 00:21:37,400 --> 00:21:40,420 I guess deep down inside, none of us really wanted to move. 431 00:21:40,440 --> 00:21:42,401 [rumbling] 432 00:21:47,500 --> 00:21:52,434 Of course I do hear Des Moines is great this time of year. 433 00:21:52,455 --> 00:21:54,477 [instrumental music] 434 00:21:58,430 --> 00:21:59,481 (male #1) 'In five, four, three, two..' 435 00:21:59,502 --> 00:22:01,484 But it'll cut into my trick or treat. 436 00:22:01,504 --> 00:22:03,658 [laughing] 437 00:22:03,677 --> 00:22:05,436 Here we go. 438 00:22:05,457 --> 00:22:07,570 But it'll cut into my trick or treat. 439 00:22:09,541 --> 00:22:11,584 I'll just say my line and go. 440 00:22:12,626 --> 00:22:13,759 [laughing] 441 00:22:17,569 --> 00:22:19,622 (Director) 'I just won $1,000.' 442 00:22:21,776 --> 00:22:25,780 'In five, four, three, two..' 443 00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:27,721 [laughing] 444 00:22:30,733 --> 00:22:32,735 It ain't me. It ain't me. 445 00:22:32,756 --> 00:22:34,768 This is.. 446 00:22:34,788 --> 00:22:35,950 I was here. I was cool. 447 00:22:39,833 --> 00:22:42,856 (Carlton) 'I can't get it out. I cannot get it out.' 448 00:22:42,876 --> 00:22:44,120 (Will) 'Come on, one more shot, one more shot.'