Ribeiro: On tonight's "AFV,"
the "oh, wow"s start right here and now.
Oh, gosh, my hair's --
[ Thud ]
♪♪
[ Wind blows ] Woman: Hey.
Man: Oh!
[ Monkeys chattering ]
Oh!
[ Baby fussing ]
[ Woman burps, laughs ]
Welcome to "America's Funniest Home Videos."
And now here he is, the host of our show --
Alfonso Ribeiro!
Oooo-ee! Come on, let's do it!
[ Applause ]
Come on. Come on. I see ya. I see ya.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Hello and welcome.
I am Alfonso, and this is "AFV,"
the show that screams "family"
both figuratively and literally --
figuratively, as in we're all about family,
and literally, as in someone screaming,
"Hey! Who drove the car into the family room?!"
And you can guarantee the person who did it
was a member of that family.
See? See? Listen. Listen. We're always on theme.
Mm-hmm.
I don't know why anyone might think this wouldn't go well.
♪♪
...giving away for free.
Ribeiro: Mirror, mirror in the trash can,
who's the guy with a really bad trash plan?
Girl: Here we go. Man: I have no idea what's about to happen.
What -- What I think will happen is,
I'm gonna hit it in the middle,
and then it should break in two and maybe fall down inside.
So let's see.
♪♪
Aah!
That's not what happened at all. It actually exploded.
Woman: Kennedy. Hmm.
Not in the shower.
Hmm.
I wonder where she could be.
Ribeiro: These funny faces are "a-door-able."
Girl: Hey.
Girl #2: Heh-heh!
[ Thud ] Ooh!
[ Laughs ]
[ Dog barking ]
Ribeiro: This guy's wife is headed out
and decides to close the garage door...
right onto the hatch of the SUV he's unloading.
♪♪
[ Beep ]
♪♪
Woman: Marlon jump. Wait, wait, wait. Get my mom. Get my mom.
Ribeiro: If "The Marlon Jump" is an annual event,
you'd think Marlon would be better at it.
[ Indistinct conversation ]
Oh!
-Oh! -Oh!
[ Bird chirping ]
Ribeiro: There's a wild bird in the house
and it doesn't seem like anyone is quite prepared for it.
♪♪
Holy -- How did it get in here?
Aah!
Ribeiro: Release the hounds.
[ Dog barking ]
It's time to go to the "Dog Park."
It's this dog's lucky day.
He found some unguarded cat food on his neighbor's porch.
♪♪
[ Cat meows, dog whimpers ]
Or so he thought.
♪♪
Woman: What he doin'?!
A room full of goose down?
Ha. They ain't down with that.
Ha ha!
Mason!
Woman: Why every time -- [ Dog chattering ]
But every time I'm doing something,
you want to talk.
Are you bored?
[ Dog chattering ] Is...
Ribeiro: I normally don't care for back talk.
But when it's as funny as this,
ha, I don't have a problem with it.
You want me to do it right now?
[ Dog chattering ]
Are you being a little dramatic?
[ Dog chattering ]
I think you're kinda spoiled. Man: Dude!
Ribeiro: He's inside the truck,
but he acts like he's riding on the roof.
♪♪
[ Woman laughs ]
♪♪
[ Laughter continues ]
[ Sustained horn honk ]
Woman: [ Laughs ]
Ribeiro: Come on, man!
He's got places to go, squirrels to see.
He's so funny!
[ Man speaks indistinctly ] [ Laughs ]
At the hair salon. [ Laughs ]
[ Man speaks indistinctly ]
Ribeiro: That bad boy is a buy-in-bulk bread burglar.
Woman: Spit 'em out.
[ Man speaks indistinctly ]
[ Laughing ] He's like...
Man: He's ashamed of himself.
[ Laughs ]
♪♪
Mm. [ Smooches ] Mm. Man: Kisses. Kisses.
Mmmm...
[ Laughs ]
Kisses. Mmmm...
[ Laughing ] Oh!
Ribeiro: This pooch is fine with a handshake... Mm...
...but he doesn't want things to go any further.
Mmmm...
Mm -- Mm! Mm.
There's a reason doggie beds are only a few inches off the floor.
♪♪
Woman: Girls. Hey, girls.
Can you not squish Hardee?
Those two dogs are in a wrestling match,
but somehow Hardee ends up the loser.
♪♪
[ Laughter, applause ]
We all have the need for speed.
And that doesn't change just because you might not have
a sports car or a fighter jet.
So buckle up, 'cause I'm feeling greedy
for toy vehicles that are speedy.
♪ All fueled up ♪
♪ I'm ignited ♪
[ Boy laughs ]
♪ Like a rocket ♪ Girl: [ Screams ]
♪ I'm launching ♪
♪ Out of my way, you'll never catch me ♪
♪ Ooh, yeah, got a need for speed ♪
♪ I want a rush now, ain't no vaccine ♪
♪ Ooh, yeah, a need for speed ♪ Oh!
♪ Oh, oh-oh, oh ♪ Woman: Oh!
♪ I got the need ♪ ♪ Need for speed ♪
♪ Mm-mm ♪ ♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh ♪
Together: Hey!
♪ I'm in a mad state ♪
♪ I'm insane ♪
♪ I simply don't care ♪
♪ No way to chain me, yeah ♪
♪ Out of my way, you'll never catch me ♪
♪ Ooh, yeah, got a need for speed ♪
♪ I want a rush now, ain't no vaccine ♪
♪ Ooh, yeah, a need for speed ♪ Aah!
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh ♪
Together: Hey!
♪ I got the need ♪ ♪ Need for speed ♪
♪ Oh-oh, oh, oh ♪
Together: Hey!
♪ Ooh, yeah ♪ ♪ Need for speed ♪
[ Applause ]
Hey, wanna see your funny video on TV?
Just upload it to AFV.com.
♪ Ooh, yeah, got a need for speed ♪ ♪ Oh! ♪
♪ Yeah ♪ ♪ I want a rush now, ain't no vaccine ♪
♪ Ain't no vaccine ♪ ♪ Ooh, yeah, got a need for speed ♪
It's been estimated that the average person
makes at least 30,000 decisions a day...
which is a lot.
So, when you see these boneheads, give 'em a break,
because on the day their boneheadedness was captured
on video, they might have only made one bad decision...
and 29,999 good ones.
[ Laughter ]
It's the last run of the day.
Woman: Oh, my God.
And the sled's decision is final.
Oh!
[ Woman laughs ]
[ Laughs ]
Ribeiro: Either those floors are too slippery...
or clumsiness just runs in the family.
♪♪
Are you okay?
Yes.
Oh! Oh, my God.
Tom, what happened?
Oh, my God! Oh! Oh!
Ribeiro: This is why parking garage area rugs
aren't really a thing.
[ Engine revving ]
[ Woman speaks indistinctly ]
Ribeiro: It's called a "softball,"
but it's still too hard to throw in the house.
♪♪
[ Clatter ]
♪♪
Oh, that's smart.
You don't want to get mulch all over your driveway.
♪♪
Okay.
I think he's gonna need a bigger tarp.
Or less manure. Like, a lot less.
♪♪
Working out can yield amazing results.
But it usually takes longer than 20 seconds.
♪♪
Look.
♪♪
[ Laughter ]
Get set for "That's Using Your Noggin,"
where we show people using their brains to solve a problem.
But don't worry --
We won't make it a habit of showing smart people.
[ Laughs ] This isn't PBS.
[ Laughter ]
There's working hard...
and then there's working smart. [ Baby fussing ]
Woman: Keep tryin'.
♪♪
[ Laughs ]
Man: Starts with a spool of rope
and a tire for weight.
Ribeiro: He invented the lawn Roomba.
Man: And a rear-drive, self-propelled lawn mower.
♪♪
And voilà!
Man: Awesome. Come on, Charlie.
Ribeiro: Forget horsepower.
This guy figured out how to harness baby power.
Come on. Yeah!
Perfect!
He loves showing his mama how much he loves her...
[ Laughs ]
Uh-oh.
...especially if it makes her drop her lunch.
[ Laughing ]
[ Monkeys chattering ]
The sign says, "Adults only."
It doesn't specify what species of adults.
♪♪
Woman: They just went inside!
♪♪
They're taking all the cookies.
They skipped the bananas and went straight for the cookies.
I think cartoons lied to me!
Look at them.
The least they could do is leave a good Yelp review.
He lost his phone, but he hasn't given up on technology just yet.
♪♪
Woman: Listen, I'll be right back.
Don't touch these until I come back, okay?
Why? Leave them there.
Ribeiro: It's the Temptation Challenge,
but this kid finds a clever workaround.
I'll be right back.
After all, she told him not to eat these candies.
She didn't say anything about those candies.
♪♪
You ready?
Doing hair by making the girl twirl? Spin, spin, spin.
Sure, give it a whirl! Spin, spin.
Spin, spin, spin, spin, spin, spin, spin, spin.
Spin, spin, spin. Keep going.
You're almost done. You're almost done.
And done.
Mom doesn't want him eating sweets,
so she told him the ice cream truck is actually
the "music truck." Boy: Truck!
Woman: The music truck! Let's wave at the music truck!
[ Scott Joplin's "The Entertainer" plays ]
Yay! Wave at the music truck.
Ribeiro: Yeah, I'm sure he won't hate her
when he realizes she was lying to him.
He'll just take it in stride.
No doubt about it.
[ Laughter ]
♪♪
Wind is like bad breath --
You can't see it, but you sure know it's there.
The difference is that wind
is more destructive than bad breath.
But try telling that to a guy with an Uber driver
who had tuna for lunch. [ Shudders ]
Storm doors can keep wind from blowing into your house.
[ Thud ] Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
But they have their drawbacks.
Are you okay?
Man: That's an expensive walk.
Woman: [ Laughs ]
That tent comes with tent spikes for a reason.
[ Laughing ]
[ Ding! ]
Might I suggest keeping your wig in the closet
and not on the front porch?
Aah!
Mom! Mama!
Moooom!
The catering crew is setting up for a party.
I don't know if this party is gonna raise the roof,
but it's certainly going to raise the canopy.
[ Wind blowing ]
♪♪
Looks like their outdoor party
is turning into a neighbor's rooftop party.
♪♪
All she wants to do is come home and put her feet up.
And technically she does.
[ Wind blowing ]
Woman: Oh, my God! Are you okay?
Woman: Woof-woof! Look up here.
Baby's first Easter picnic is a wrap.
[ Wind blowing ]
Hey! -Oh!
[ Ding! ] Ribeiro: If she didn't get this on video,
no one would have believed her.
[ Wind blowing ]
No!
Woman: Off to the...
Ribeiro: The weather is less than picture-perfect.
Come on, baby girl. Open the door for me.
Oh! Oh! Oh, dang! Let me...
Oh! Oh!
[ Shouts indistinctly ]
♪♪
You've probably all said to yourselves at some point,
"Man, that Alfonso never messes up!"
How do I do it?
Do I rehearse my lines for hours on end
until they're burned into my brain,
making it virtually impossible for me to make a faux pas?
No. [ Laughter ]
I just have an editor remove all my mistakes.
Plus, he leaves in all the mistakes
the people in the videos make, which makes me look extra good.
[ Laughter ]
[ Child speaks indistinctly ]
Ribeiro: Here's why Jedis rarely train in the family room.
[ Child speaking indistinctly ]
[ Thud ]
Man: Oh, my God!
Ribeiro: Blowing bubbles is fun in the summer.
But it takes on a whole new twist in the winter.
♪♪
[ Laughter ]
♪♪
[ Cracking ]
Sometimes you have to tell your kids "no."
Like when they want to step on the gas pedal.
[ Speaks indistinctly ] [ Engine revs ]
Aah! [ Crash ]
[ Engine revving ]
♪♪
[ Baby coos ]
Ribeiro: Just because she was recently a baby
doesn't mean she knows how to take care of one.
[ Clatter ] Woman: [ Laughs ]
That's not okay. Go pick up your baby.
-[ Grunts ] -[ Clatter ]
[ Scraping ]
Ribeiro: Few people call winter their favorite season.
♪♪
Woman: Ow!
Ribeiro: And I'm betting this lady's one of them.
Woman: Ow! Uhh!
Uh! Oh!
[ Gasps, groans ]
[ Whimpers ]
It is fun. Do the Superman.
Girl: Do the Superman!
Ribeiro: He's gone this long without getting on a treadmill.
Why start now?
Woman: You're joking. Oh, come on.
[ Treadmill whirring ] Aah!
Oh, my God.
Oh! Ohh! [ Laughs ]
I don't really want to give him a bath
because I don't really think cats necessarily need them,
but Toby needs one, so we're gonna go do that.
[ Water running ] Okay. Oh, my God.
All right.
Ribeiro: I think it's time to throw in the towel.
The bath towel, that is.
Young woman: Oh, my gosh. Ow!
[ Speaks indistinctly ]
Ribeiro: He's pulling your shirt off
so that you'll take the bath instead.
I'm not giving him a bath.
[ Laughter ]
♪♪
A celebrity's opinion is sort of like a guy playing banjo
on the subway --
Absolutely nobody wants to hear it.
Now, with that said, check out my opinions
and be glad I don't own a banjo.
[ Imitates banjo playing ]
I'm gonna give you "my 2 cents"...
which is about as worthless as 2 actual cents.
My 2 cents --
If you want to improve your cardio,
you need to work out for more than one second per day.
Oh, gosh. My hair's --
[ Thud ]
[ Laughs ]
A New Year's nugget of knowledge --
Not all kids think it's awesome
getting to stay up till midnight.
Man: Four, three...
two, one!
Man: Happy New Year!
[ Laughs ]
A roundball recommendation --
If you find a hoop for 50 cents on Craigslist,
there's probably a reason.
♪♪
[ Birds chirping ]
A potato proposal --
If you have trouble cutting your food,
you might want to move in with this lady.
Child: Mom's about to cut the potato... Woman: Ready?
...with -- with her katana.
Set?
[ Gasps ] Aah!
[ Laughs ]
[ Laughing ] Oh! Okay, erase that.
Some vehicle advice --
You may find that you have more control
of your truck if you're actually in the truck,
instead of on an icy driveway next to it.
♪♪
[ Sighs ]
This has been "My 2 Cents."
You can take that to the bank.
[ Applause ]
It's time to salute some of the video heroes
who took home lots of zeroes --
with a digit in front of all of those zeroes, of course.
What I'm saying is, they earned some major bucks.
It's time to have a blast
with some big winners from "AFV's" past.
Woman: You gotta start from one, though.
Go all the way, 1 to 10.
Sure, Spanish or Korean. Whatever you want.
One...
Four Spanish. Five Spanish.
Six Spanish.
Seven Spanish.
Eight Spanish.
Nine Spanish.
10 Spanish!
Yay, high five!
[ Laughter ]
Man: Come on! You can do it! [ Groans ]
Man #2: Come on. Come on. Babe, you can do it. Let's go. Ah!
Ribeiro: Alligator farm employees
seem to have a knack
for choosing the perfect "volunteer."
Babe, look at me. Babe, look at me. Woman: I can't! I can't!
Look at me. Babe.
No, don't you dare let go. Don't you dare.
-Okay. -You got it!
Hey, don't drop him. Don't you dare!
Man #2: Okay!
Please, don't you dare! No, no, no, no.
[ Laughter ]
Don't you dare. Don't you let -- No, no. No, no, no.
I'm trusting you! I...
I'm trusting you!
Bring this arm down just a little bit.
-Oh, but I'm trusting you. -No, no, no. But...
No, but I'm trusting you. No, but I can't hear now.
Now, I'm gonna come to the side
and we're gonna take a picture, but you look at the camera.
-Babe, look. Look at me. -Look at the camera.
Look at me.
[ Laughter ]
Smile!
What are you doing?!
Get back over here! No. It's your picture!
Get over here! No, I don't want no picture!
I don't...
I'm right here! I'm right here!
[ Laughter ]
[ Boy crying ]
Man: Stop crying. Please.
There's a second iPhone in here.
Woman: No, that's your -- That's your case.
My si--
Ava: [ Crying ] I want one! Boy: I want an iPhone!
Ribeiro: Watching their big sister get a new cellphone
rates about 100 on the Jealous-o-meter.
Woman: Oh, you've got an iPhone. Whose idea was this?!
[ Sobs ]
Ava, why are you upset?
Whose idea was this?!
Man: Listen...
Leah: Thank you.
Ribeiro: Let's circle back next week
for another "Winner's Circle."
♪♪
Children: Hey, Alfonso!
Both: Hey, Alfonso!
We want to see more copycat videos!
[ Laughter ]
Okay, Nora and Lucille.
You want more copycat videos?
Well, I hope you'll help me celebrate some people
and animals who were born to imitate.
This copycat is actually a "copy-dog."
♪♪
[ Girls laugh ]
[ Screeches ]
Come on, Rodgers!
Come on. Tell him! You gotta make that catch.
You gotta make that catch!
That's what I'm talkin' about! It's for all the marbles.
This -- This is what I'm talkin' about!
This is for the marbles!
Come on!
Let's go!
[ Woman laughs ]
Woman: Do that again.
Ribeiro: I think the kangaroo's asking you what's in your pouch.
♪♪
[ Goat bleats ]
[ Girl yells ] [ Goat bleats ]
[ Girl yelling ]
[ Goat bleats ]
[ Girl yells, goat bleats ]
[ Girl yelling ]
[ Girl yells, goat bleats ]
Woman: [ Laughs ] Ribeiro: Grandpa knows how to skip.
You're doing it. Let's see if Grandma has what it takes.
Boy: Here we go.
Now, you're gonna video me, right?
Yes. What does this skirt -- shirt say?
"I'm that Grandma. Sorry, not sorry."
That's right.
[ Laughter ]
Ribeiro: Her shirt says, "I'm that Grandma."
But I think that grandma should skip that skipping.
What are you doing with your arms?
[ Laughter ]
[ Chanting ] O-kay!
Both: [ Chanting ] Beaver fandom,
present over here!
Get up, get up, let's hear you cheer!
Red! White!
[ Chanting indistinctly ]
Ribeiro: Two, four, six, eight. That little brother can imitate.
Both: Get up, get up, let's hear you cheer!
[ Wind blowing ]
Woman: All right. We're just having a great day at the beach.
Walter...
Cathy...
Zeezee...
Barber...
Ford...
and this guy.
[ Laughter ]
♪♪
A little while ago, we visited "The Winner's Circle."
Here are some videos hoping to join that club.
I guess you could say they're hanging out
outside the club behind the velvet rope...
which would make me the bouncer.
Okay, people! One line, one line!
Step back from the rope and keep that sidewalk clear!
[ Laughter ]
Woman: One little ray of sunshine,
poking through the tree,
shining down on one...
No, Mila, no!
[ Mila sniffs, woman laughs ]
Ribeiro: This guy shouldn't worry.
He's just standing directly underneath 20 pounds
of pink insulation
that's been sitting in a damp attic for 20 years.
[ Man sighs ]
Woman: Ooh!
[ Laughs ]
Woman: Is it good? Ribeiro: That ice cream is cold.
But not as cold as the look he gives his dad.
Hmm? Man: Don't make a mess.
Oh! [ Laughs ]
Nah. Nah.
[ Laughs ]
[ Gasps ] Ahh! Nah. Oh! [ Laughs ]
Nah, don't make a mess!
What are you doing?
Who you think you're lookin' at like that?
Look at him. He's... Nah.
Look. He's not having that.
There has to be a story behind
why she put that on her forehead.
And it's probably too long to fit on a Post-it.
Woman: [ Whispering ] Oh, Lydia.
Good night. I love you.
[ Smooches ]
The kid's learning to hit.
-Ready? Go! -You gonna hit him?
Ribeiro: The guy behind him is learning where not to stand.
[ Man laughs ]
[ Laughter, applause ]
College is now so expensive
that some parents start saving for it the minute
their baby is born.
But there's an easier solution --
Just start recording everything
your kid says the moment they start talking.
They might say something funny enough to end up on "AFV"
and win 20 grand.
Which should cover maybe around, uh...
like -- like, two weeks of college?
[ Laughter ]
Woman: What are you doin'?
Girl: [ Shouting indistinctly ]
[ Laughs ]
I don't think you're gonna float up in the --
I think you're too heavy.
No...
♪♪
[ Laughs ]
Woman: Put your hands up.
All right, put 'em back down.
What is it called again?
A crotch-top shirt.
It's called a crop top.
Crotch top shirt.
No, it's crop.
Mm.
Make sure -- No...
Yeah, it does. That's too...
Buddy.
♪
♪♪♪
Oh, God! I'm so sorry.
Woman: [ Gasps ]
[ Group cheering, clapping ]
It's a boy! Whoo-hoo!
[ Screeches ]
A little boy!
-What does it mean? -Maximus!
[ Laughter ]
Man: Ethan, tell me what hurts.
My thumb.
Okay, and what do you need to make it feel better?
♪♪
[ Door closes ]
Boy: Listen. I know that...
I know that smile!
Man: [ Laughs ]
Dad, I know that smile.
[ Laughs ] I don't know what you're talking about.
I know that smile. I know that smile. I don't know what you're...
I have no idea what you're talking about.
♪♪
[ Woman laughs ]
♪♪
Ah! It's time to enjoy the great outdoors
in the best way possible --
from the comfort of your couch.
We even cut it to a catchy classical tango,
which is a nicer thing to hear in the great outdoors
than your husband yelling,
"Hey, I need more wieners on the grill!"
[ Laughter ]
[ Bizet's "Habanera (from 'Carmen')" plays ]
Ah!
Throw it!
Aah! [ Gasps ]
♪♪
[ Children shouting indistinctly ]
Man: Oh-ho-ho! Gosh!
[ Woman laughs ]
♪♪
Oh! [ Laughs ]
♪♪
[ Laughter ] Man: Oh!
♪♪
-Ooh! -Aah! Aah!
♪♪
Ohh! Man: Oh!
♪♪
Woman: Whoo! Oh!
♪♪
Man: Oh!
♪♪
Oh!
♪♪
Oh!
♪♪
[ Laughs ]
♪♪
[ Laughter ]
Aaahhh!
Aaaahhh!
Woman: Oh!
♪♪
Do you have a funny video worth $20,000?
What are you waiting for?
Upload it to AFV.com.
♪♪
We live in a world where everybody is so distracted,
they can't concentrate on what they're doing.
But even in a package full of people who can't focus,
at least the videos are in focus.
He's teaching the kids to keep their eye on the ball.
But he should remember to keep an eye on the koi pond.
Boy: Oh! Oh!
Boy #2: Dad! Oh.
Man: What are you doing with that log?
Ribeiro: That boy's bringing his daddy a big log.
Me?
But Daddy's other son calls over to him
at the most inopportune time.
[ Boy yelling in distance ]
Ow!
[ Woman laughs ]
Ribeiro: The family's headed out for a trip to the mall.
[ Horn honks ]
[ Door closes ] [ Ding! ]
The baby's no longer in that stroller.
But Grandma doesn't know that.
Oh, no! No! No!
No!
Starting a fire by rubbing two sticks together?
That'll take forever! [ Ding! ]
Or however long it takes him to turn his back.
Oh, my goodness' sakes!
-Wow! -Way to go, Sully!
Ribeiro: He almost completes an entire errand
without looking at his phone.
Almost.
♪♪
He asked her to secretly film his marriage proposal.
But in her defense, raccoons are really cute.
♪♪
And...
she missed it.
[ Laughter, applause ]
♪♪
You know what the world needs now?
A kid who's got this Easter thing figured out.
♪♪
Three, two, one.
Woman: Don't!
Woman #2: Oh! [ Laughing ] Oh, my gosh.
-What did he do? -Was he supposed to do that?
Boy: [ Squeals ] I have no idea.
Oh, my gosh!
Ribeiro: I hope you've enjoyed "A Kid
Who's got This Easter Thing Figured Out."
♪♪
Some shows try so hard to be clever,
they go right over everyone's head.
But not "AFV."
Our humor is intended to smack you right in the head...
so you're not only laughing at the people in the videos --
You feel like 'em, too.
Like, "Ow! What was that? Ow."
♪♪
Mah!
♪♪
Mah!
Ribeiro: I guess Dad's jeans are too tight for this maneuver.
♪♪
[ Laughing ]
[ Squeals, laughs ]
Ribeiro: That girl's braver than Indiana Jones.
[ Girl squealing ]
Ribeiro: Heck, she's braver than pretty much everyone I know.
Girl: [ Squeals, laughs ]
[ Squeals ]
Woman: Cara, smile!
♪♪
Ribeiro: A crowbar turns into an "oh, no" bar.
Child: [ Babbles ]
Oh, help!
Help!
What are you doing?
♪♪
Ribeiro: I don't know if he grew the hedges this tall
for looks...
Aah! Ribeiro: ...or to cushion his falls.
♪♪
Woman: What did he do? Man: [ Laughs ]
I want to roll up the window, but his head's in there.
No, don't roll up the window.
He's spitting stuff everywhere. Eww.
Ribeiro: Dad said, "Don't roll up the window." Woman: Oh, my gosh.
And that's the last time Nathan will ever listen to him.
Man: Oh, he's comin'.
Woman: Look at those teeth.
[ Llama spits ] Aaahh!
Ohh! [ Girl shrieks ]
[ Girl crying ]
Woman: Hey!
All right. We're going.
We're going.
All right. I don't know about this guy.
[ Girl crying ]
Boy: Ewwww!
♪♪
Ribeiro: Now you know how he got the nickname "Cribface Mcgee."
♪♪
He doesn't just go through the defense.
Boy: I call that a double dribble.
-Jacob! -You slammed me into it.
Hey, 2 points is 2 points.
♪♪
[ Baby fussing ]
[ Woman burps, laughs ]
♪♪
We live in a world full of distractions.
Hey, hey! Are you paying attention
or just doom-scrolling on your phone?
Well, be careful
or you could end up in a "Distracted" package
like the one we showed earlier...
which wouldn't be so bad since "Distracted"
is actually tonight's "Assignment America."
We want funny videos almost too funny to mention
due to people simply not paying attention. Jess?
Do you know someone whose life has been impacted
due to the fact that they're easily distracted?
Did they trip over a rug looking at a bug,
or get beaned while staring at a screen?
Well, send the video our way.
It could win you 20 or even 100 grand.
Upload the video to AFV.com.
For full contest rules, log on to AFV.com.
All I'm asking is for people bad at multi-tasking!
♪♪
Well, the show's almost over, but we're not quite done.
I hope you'll stick around to find out who won!
Let's meet our finalists.
First up, her lack of awareness is truly bizarre,
causing her husband to get eaten by his car.
It's "Double Door Ding Dongs"
sent in by Kevin Sullivan from Puyallup, Washington.
This guy's wife is headed out
and decides to close the garage door...
right onto the hatch of the SUV he's unloading.
[ Beep ]
Joining us are Kevin and Nancy.
So, Kevin, what was going through your mind
as the garage door closed the car hatch on you?
I couldn't believe she couldn't see me!
And I was worried she was gonna scratch up the back of my car.
Ribeiro: [ Laughs ] Well, I'm pretty sure
it did maybe leave a little scratch here and there.
Now, Nancy, I heard
that you didn't even want the security camera.
What do you think about your purchase now?
It was well worth the investment.
[ Laughter ]
Well, we love that. See, it all worked out!
Good luck.
Thank you. Thanks.
Next up, most dogs enjoy a really long walk,
but this pooch prefers a really long talk.
It's "The Hound of Sound"
sent in by Jolene Moyer from Friendship, Wisconsin.
Woman: Why every time -- [ Dog chattering ]
But every time I'm doing something,
you want to talk.
Are you bored?
[ Dog chattering ]
Are you being a little dramatic?
[ Dog chattering ]
Joining us are Jolene, Greg, and Duke.
Now, Jolene, Duke actually sounded
like he was responding to your questions.
Is this unusual?
He's always done it, his whole life.
He's 5 now.
If you talk to him, he'll talk back, usually.
[ Laughs ] Okay, alright, now, are there any special things
that Duke can say?
He says "Mama" and he says "I love you."
Ribeiro: You know what I can say?
-Good luck! -[ Laughter ]
Thank you. Thank you!
All right.
Finally, it can take a long time getting ripped at the gym,
but for this kid, it's quick -- at least, according to him.
It's "Getting Fit in a Flash"
sent in by Chelsea Icenhour from Mauk, Georgia.
♪♪
Working out can yield amazing results.
But it usually takes longer than 20 seconds.
Look.
♪♪
Joining us are Chelsea, Mark, and Joseph.
Now, Chelsea, Joseph clearly has quite a good sense of humor,
I'm guessing he makes you laugh quite often.
All the time. Every day.
Ribeiro: Oh, I love it.
Now, Joseph, I understand that you film a lot of things.
What would you like to do with these videos one day?
Maybe YouTube.
Maybe YouTube? Well, you've got the perfect first clip
when you make your own channel, okay?
-Okay. -Alright, alright.
-Good luck, y'all! -[ Applause ]
-Thank you. -Alright.
We're gonna find out who takes home the cash
in just a minute, but first,
let's take a look at some of the clips
that didn't make our top three
in tonight's "Honorable Mention."
♪♪
[ Applause ]
Okay, it's time to hand out tonight's prizes.
$20,000 for first, $6,000 for second,
and $4,000 for third. Here we go!
Our third place, $4,000 winner is...
"Getting Fit in a Flash"
sent in by Chelsea Icenhour from Mauk, Georgia!
[ Cheers and applause ]
Thank you.
And the winner of the $20,000
and tonight's funniest home video is...
"The Hound of Sound"
sent in by Jolene Moyer from Friendship, Wisconsin.
We have Jolene, Greg, and Duke. Go Duke!
Yes! Congratulations! Good job! Yay!
Is there anything special you're going to do for Duke
now that he's won you all this money?
We are going to go on vacation.
Take him where we can let him run.
Ribeiro: Oh, I love that! And you know what?
If Duke doesn't like the way you spend the $20,000,
I'm pretty sure he's gonna let you know!
Oh, yeah. He's gonna let us know.
He's talking to us right now.
Oh, I love it. I love it. Well, congratulations.
You've got $20,000 and a shot at $100,000!
Thank you! Thank you!
Alright. Well, that's our show.
I'd love to stick around,
but we rented out the studio for a high school dance
and I don't want to get roped into being a chaperone...
-again! -[ Laughter ]
We'll see you next time, and don't forget,
if you upload a video and it airs on the show,
we'll send you an AFV T-shirt.
So, good night everybody, and remember,
send your video to me, you might win twenty Gs.
Good night, y'all!
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪