1 00:00:02,895 --> 00:00:04,628 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:10,753 --> 00:00:14,755 As we embark on the sacred task of choosing a new pontiff, 3 00:00:14,907 --> 00:00:17,574 let the Holy Spirit guide us. 4 00:00:17,593 --> 00:00:21,428 In nomine Patris et Filii et Spiritus Sancti. Amen. 5 00:00:21,522 --> 00:00:23,671 BART: The Doge of Venice sends his regards, 6 00:00:23,766 --> 00:00:25,249 you (bleep) papal stooge. 7 00:00:25,267 --> 00:00:27,342 Choke on your own junk, Petrucci. 8 00:00:27,361 --> 00:00:29,862 That'll teach you to exclude the Ecumenical Council, 9 00:00:30,013 --> 00:00:31,938 you (bleep) papist lapdogs. 10 00:00:32,033 --> 00:00:34,883 Throat cut. Head chop. Taste it. 11 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:37,277 (bleep), (bleep), (bleep). 12 00:00:37,446 --> 00:00:38,520 (groans): Oh! 13 00:00:38,614 --> 00:00:40,539 Where did you learn to talk like that?! 14 00:00:40,766 --> 00:00:42,599 -Was it Selma? -Aw, honey, 15 00:00:42,618 --> 00:00:45,527 we're just worried that this bloody, potty-mouthed game 16 00:00:45,546 --> 00:00:48,696 -is turning your mind to... -To (bleep). 17 00:00:48,791 --> 00:00:50,274 Oh, fine. 18 00:00:50,367 --> 00:00:53,052 -Then can I play Future War: Death Guts? -No. 19 00:00:53,279 --> 00:00:55,295 Future War 2: Brain Carnage? 20 00:00:55,447 --> 00:00:56,280 No! 21 00:00:56,298 --> 00:00:57,781 But then what do I play? 22 00:00:57,874 --> 00:00:59,283 I have to play some game. 23 00:00:59,285 --> 00:01:01,393 Of course you do. 24 00:01:04,456 --> 00:01:06,807 MARGE: Do you like your new game, sweetie? 25 00:01:06,901 --> 00:01:09,551 -No. -Do you want to stop playing? 26 00:01:09,719 --> 00:01:11,219 -No. -Perfect. 27 00:01:11,313 --> 00:01:13,630 That's right in the video game sweet spot. 28 00:01:13,649 --> 00:01:16,075 I found that blocky game on a moms' group. 29 00:01:16,260 --> 00:01:19,303 It's an online world where you learn to help, share, 30 00:01:19,396 --> 00:01:22,915 and get virtual stickers for celebrating our differences. 31 00:01:23,066 --> 00:01:24,566 (groans) 32 00:01:24,660 --> 00:01:26,251 It's good for all ages, 33 00:01:26,478 --> 00:01:27,753 so I'm also letting Maggie play. 34 00:01:27,980 --> 00:01:29,421 Let me help you get set up. 35 00:01:29,573 --> 00:01:32,424 I downloaded the instructions and-- Oh. 36 00:01:32,651 --> 00:01:35,427 I guess giving you that thing to shut you up at restaurants 37 00:01:35,579 --> 00:01:37,262 really paid off. 38 00:01:38,307 --> 00:01:40,507 MILHOUSE: And these bushy eyebrows 39 00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:44,177 are the cherry on top of this hunk sundae. Uh-oh. 40 00:01:44,271 --> 00:01:46,087 My nose is glitching. 41 00:01:46,165 --> 00:01:49,090 Yeah, this stupid old computer is super glitchy. 42 00:01:49,110 --> 00:01:51,001 Why is the flat screen so thick? 43 00:01:51,094 --> 00:01:52,778 Is it also a microwave? 44 00:01:52,929 --> 00:01:55,614 Look, I bought this mohawk with Bobux. 45 00:01:55,765 --> 00:01:57,357 What the hell are Bobux? 46 00:01:57,509 --> 00:01:59,284 It's the money you use in the game. 47 00:01:59,511 --> 00:02:01,269 You buy it with your parents' credit card 48 00:02:01,363 --> 00:02:05,124 so you can get skins, costumes, wigs, 49 00:02:05,275 --> 00:02:07,351 even a dragon codpiece. 50 00:02:07,444 --> 00:02:09,128 BART: Ah, you're the only person on Earth 51 00:02:09,279 --> 00:02:11,279 who looks lamer in a mohawk. 52 00:02:11,373 --> 00:02:13,857 See if this rando will buy it. 53 00:02:14,026 --> 00:02:16,635 "I'll sell it for one Bobux." 54 00:02:17,696 --> 00:02:19,713 (cash register rings) 55 00:02:19,882 --> 00:02:20,973 MILHOUSE: Booyah! 56 00:02:21,200 --> 00:02:22,307 BART: Well, that's weird. 57 00:02:22,534 --> 00:02:24,309 You got the money, but you got another mohawk. 58 00:02:24,461 --> 00:02:26,645 See if you can sell it again. 59 00:02:26,796 --> 00:02:28,147 (cash register rings) 60 00:02:28,298 --> 00:02:29,648 BART: Another one. 61 00:02:29,875 --> 00:02:32,317 Whoa, it's like printing money. 62 00:02:32,469 --> 00:02:33,986 It's probably 'cause we're playing 63 00:02:34,137 --> 00:02:36,880 on this crappy old computer. 64 00:02:36,899 --> 00:02:38,806 Don't they have these same old (bleep) Colecos 65 00:02:38,901 --> 00:02:40,901 in the school computer lab? 66 00:02:40,995 --> 00:02:43,328 (chuckles): They're even older and more crappy. 67 00:02:43,555 --> 00:02:45,480 Then that glitch is gonna make us rich. 68 00:02:45,574 --> 00:02:48,725 All we need to do is round up a bunch of nerds. 69 00:02:48,818 --> 00:02:50,652 Nerds we got. 70 00:02:50,746 --> 00:02:53,130 -(video game music playing) -(cash registers ringing) 71 00:02:58,161 --> 00:03:00,070 (video game sound effects playing) 72 00:03:00,163 --> 00:03:01,663 Wow, Maggie. 73 00:03:01,831 --> 00:03:04,165 You really love this game, huh? 74 00:03:04,185 --> 00:03:06,351 So involving. Hmm. 75 00:03:06,578 --> 00:03:09,396 I'm gonna log in to see what's so fascinating. 76 00:03:11,007 --> 00:03:13,549 Brought you some strawberries and bananas. 77 00:03:14,603 --> 00:03:17,679 Oh, you like bananas but not strawberries. 78 00:03:17,698 --> 00:03:19,698 Good to know. Wait! 79 00:03:19,849 --> 00:03:22,442 You just talked! You're talking! 80 00:03:22,594 --> 00:03:25,262 With tiny pictures! Do it again. 81 00:03:25,355 --> 00:03:27,431 You hate broccoli. 82 00:03:27,449 --> 00:03:30,600 Oh, my God, we're having our first conversation. 83 00:03:30,602 --> 00:03:32,044 This is amazing. 84 00:03:32,271 --> 00:03:34,362 I'm talking to my baby. 85 00:03:34,456 --> 00:03:38,217 (gasps) Thank you, screen time. 86 00:03:40,054 --> 00:03:43,613 Skinner, your school's test scores made the paper. 87 00:03:43,632 --> 00:03:46,742 -Hmm? -The Chinese press is using them as proof 88 00:03:46,744 --> 00:03:50,604 of the decline of the American educational system. 89 00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:55,792 Well, we did have all that lead in the water fountain pipes. 90 00:03:55,885 --> 00:03:57,461 Oh, lead, lead, lead. 91 00:03:57,554 --> 00:03:59,129 Everything's always lead with you. 92 00:03:59,222 --> 00:04:00,814 This school is a train wreck. 93 00:04:00,966 --> 00:04:02,632 I want those numbers up, Seymour. 94 00:04:02,651 --> 00:04:05,135 Get me a PowerPoint presentation Monday. 95 00:04:05,228 --> 00:04:07,137 I'll have it done by Sunday night. 96 00:04:07,230 --> 00:04:09,122 Don't ruin my weekend. 97 00:04:09,975 --> 00:04:11,825 (sighs) Hmm. 98 00:04:11,977 --> 00:04:15,812 Strange, the download rate is 87 megabytes per second. 99 00:04:15,831 --> 00:04:17,572 We're paying for 91. 100 00:04:17,666 --> 00:04:18,648 Better check the router. 101 00:04:18,667 --> 00:04:20,166 Hmm? 102 00:04:20,261 --> 00:04:22,410 Why aren't you students in class? 103 00:04:22,504 --> 00:04:26,581 Um, we're playing Oregon Trail and no one's having a good time. 104 00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:29,175 Hmm. I don't see any oxen with dysentery. 105 00:04:29,328 --> 00:04:31,495 Milhouse, what's really going on here? 106 00:04:31,513 --> 00:04:33,421 We found a video game glitch that makes money 107 00:04:33,515 --> 00:04:36,683 and now Bart is the boss of a lucrative criminal enterprise! 108 00:04:36,777 --> 00:04:39,594 You want strawberries or Nutella? 109 00:04:39,613 --> 00:04:41,004 A crepe station? 110 00:04:41,097 --> 00:04:43,690 Simpson, you are staring down the barrel 111 00:04:43,784 --> 00:04:46,026 of a harshly-worded email to your parents. 112 00:04:46,120 --> 00:04:48,453 That I will follow up on. 113 00:04:48,605 --> 00:04:50,938 Seymour, walk with me. 114 00:04:51,033 --> 00:04:54,518 Well, I do need 9,000 more steps. 115 00:04:54,611 --> 00:04:57,187 I'm gonna be straight with you. We're printing money. 116 00:04:57,280 --> 00:05:00,448 Yes, I saw Hubert's Rolex fidget-spinner. 117 00:05:00,467 --> 00:05:04,361 Now, I know you'd never take any sketchy cash for yourself, 118 00:05:04,454 --> 00:05:07,047 but what if we gave this train wreck of a school 119 00:05:07,199 --> 00:05:08,807 a piece of the action? 120 00:05:09,034 --> 00:05:10,142 I wish people would stop 121 00:05:10,369 --> 00:05:11,959 calling this school a train wreck. 122 00:05:12,054 --> 00:05:13,294 (exclaims) 123 00:05:13,388 --> 00:05:14,813 (sighs) 124 00:05:14,964 --> 00:05:16,706 Everyone else sees Seymour Skinner 125 00:05:16,725 --> 00:05:19,634 as a broken-down sad-sack never-was in a cheap suit, 126 00:05:19,653 --> 00:05:23,380 but I see a broken-down sad-sack never-was in a cheap suit 127 00:05:23,398 --> 00:05:25,382 with a vision for this school, 128 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:28,160 a vision he never dared tell anyone about. 129 00:05:28,387 --> 00:05:31,646 I do have a vision-- no, no, a desperate prayer-- 130 00:05:31,740 --> 00:05:33,723 that could save this school. 131 00:05:33,817 --> 00:05:35,959 Tell me everything. 132 00:05:37,153 --> 00:05:40,730 ♪ In my dream there's a theater ♪ 133 00:05:40,749 --> 00:05:44,158 ♪ A theater so cool ♪ 134 00:05:44,178 --> 00:05:46,736 ♪ They'll turn this dump ♪ 135 00:05:46,830 --> 00:05:50,182 ♪ Into a magnet arts school ♪ 136 00:05:50,333 --> 00:05:53,593 ♪ No testing to standardize ♪ 137 00:05:53,745 --> 00:05:56,746 ♪ When all the kids are "dolls" and "guys" ♪ 138 00:05:56,840 --> 00:05:59,599 ♪ Academic benchmarks cannot be exacting ♪ 139 00:05:59,751 --> 00:06:04,196 ♪ When all you teach is dance and acting ♪ 140 00:06:04,347 --> 00:06:07,515 ♪ If the baseball team's on a 12-game slide ♪ 141 00:06:07,534 --> 00:06:10,427 ♪ We're not athletes, that's a point of pride ♪ 142 00:06:10,445 --> 00:06:13,613 ♪ All you need is just one famous grad ♪ 143 00:06:13,765 --> 00:06:17,859 ♪ An Idina Menzel or even one Josh Gad ♪ 144 00:06:18,862 --> 00:06:21,788 ♪ No more STEM classes for this wide-eyed fool ♪ 145 00:06:21,940 --> 00:06:25,592 ♪ Only fails and passes when this dump becomes ♪ 146 00:06:26,628 --> 00:06:30,447 ♪ A magnet performing ♪ 147 00:06:30,540 --> 00:06:32,874 ♪ Arts ♪ 148 00:06:32,893 --> 00:06:38,379 ♪ School. ♪ 149 00:06:38,473 --> 00:06:39,623 Aah! 150 00:06:39,641 --> 00:06:41,191 (groans) I'm in. 151 00:06:45,647 --> 00:06:47,614 -(video game music playing) -(cash registers ringing) 152 00:06:56,232 --> 00:06:57,916 Giving all these kids computer lab passes 153 00:06:58,143 --> 00:07:00,234 for the rest of the term was a great idea. 154 00:07:00,328 --> 00:07:02,421 Too bad we can't work after-school hours. 155 00:07:02,589 --> 00:07:05,072 What if we say it's midnight basketball? 156 00:07:05,167 --> 00:07:08,835 Ooh, Skinner, who knew you were such a devil? 157 00:07:08,987 --> 00:07:10,929 Well, I learned from the best. 158 00:07:11,006 --> 00:07:13,490 -Or should I say, the worst? -(chuckles) 159 00:07:13,508 --> 00:07:16,676 So, how do you turn the game dollars into real dollars? 160 00:07:16,770 --> 00:07:17,994 We use the Bobux to buy cucumbers 161 00:07:18,013 --> 00:07:19,921 in the game Vegetable Crossing. 162 00:07:19,940 --> 00:07:21,347 Then brine those into Pickle Pesos, 163 00:07:21,500 --> 00:07:23,591 which convert ten-to-one in Delta miles, 164 00:07:23,669 --> 00:07:25,502 then use those to buy Panda Express gift cards, 165 00:07:25,595 --> 00:07:28,004 which you donate to Amnesty International, 166 00:07:28,097 --> 00:07:29,355 then you can sell the tax credits 167 00:07:29,432 --> 00:07:32,175 for cold, hard Danish kroner. 168 00:07:32,194 --> 00:07:34,694 (speaks Danish) 169 00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:36,513 MARGE: Now that we're finally talking, 170 00:07:36,531 --> 00:07:38,457 there are so many things I've been dying 171 00:07:38,608 --> 00:07:40,274 to chat with you about. 172 00:07:40,294 --> 00:07:42,018 Like, what's your favorite animal? 173 00:07:42,111 --> 00:07:44,111 Elephant! 174 00:07:44,206 --> 00:07:46,465 And what do you want to be when you grow up? 175 00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:49,134 An elephant doctor. 176 00:07:49,285 --> 00:07:50,877 Aw! 177 00:07:51,029 --> 00:07:53,046 (gasps) You love me. 178 00:07:53,198 --> 00:07:55,140 Oh, Maggie! 179 00:07:55,309 --> 00:07:58,218 Uh, Marge, you're in this game world all the time now, 180 00:07:58,312 --> 00:08:00,537 so I'm trying to dry my pants in the microwave. 181 00:08:00,630 --> 00:08:03,148 Should I set it on "potato" or "popcorn"? 182 00:08:03,299 --> 00:08:07,152 Homie, Maggie just said "I love you" to me. 183 00:08:07,303 --> 00:08:09,546 I never thought I'd hear it for the first time 184 00:08:09,639 --> 00:08:13,492 in a massively multiplayer online roleplaying game, 185 00:08:13,719 --> 00:08:16,219 but I'll never forget it. 186 00:08:16,238 --> 00:08:18,312 Wait, in this game Maggie can talk? 187 00:08:18,332 --> 00:08:20,999 There's so many things I've wanted to ask a baby. 188 00:08:21,150 --> 00:08:22,650 Why do you make eye contact when you poop? 189 00:08:22,744 --> 00:08:24,410 Do you remember when I lost you at Home Depot? 190 00:08:24,505 --> 00:08:27,230 Where do faces go during peekaboo? 191 00:08:27,249 --> 00:08:29,566 Maggie heart doughnut man? 192 00:08:29,584 --> 00:08:31,234 But I'm doughnut man! 193 00:08:31,253 --> 00:08:33,069 She loves me. She loves me! 194 00:08:33,088 --> 00:08:34,921 One of my three kids loves me! 195 00:08:35,073 --> 00:08:37,349 Whee...! 196 00:08:37,576 --> 00:08:38,925 (laughs) 197 00:08:39,019 --> 00:08:41,168 Stupid art school. 198 00:08:41,188 --> 00:08:42,169 (grunts) 199 00:08:42,264 --> 00:08:43,930 We're gonna have gum-proof floors, 200 00:08:44,082 --> 00:08:45,339 acoustics that make second graders 201 00:08:45,359 --> 00:08:46,766 sound like sixth graders. 202 00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:48,434 And the ceiling's gonna be so high, 203 00:08:48,587 --> 00:08:51,530 our resident opera ghoul won't bump his head on the rafters. 204 00:08:52,699 --> 00:08:54,440 Ouch! 205 00:08:54,535 --> 00:08:57,944 Seymour, where on earth did you find the money for this? 206 00:08:58,113 --> 00:09:00,539 Um, look at the parent donation thermometer. 207 00:09:00,766 --> 00:09:02,189 (chuckles) 208 00:09:02,284 --> 00:09:05,126 Ah, well, the thermometer doesn't lie. 209 00:09:06,271 --> 00:09:09,105 You wanted to see me, sir? 210 00:09:09,198 --> 00:09:12,033 -We both wanted to see you. -Martin, 211 00:09:12,052 --> 00:09:14,368 when you run a business, as we are, 212 00:09:14,388 --> 00:09:16,203 you need a product and a market 213 00:09:16,372 --> 00:09:18,205 and a workforce that isn't full of... 214 00:09:18,300 --> 00:09:21,134 -Jive-ass snitches. -I'm sorry? 215 00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:24,954 We've heard you're gonna sing to your parents about this... 216 00:09:24,973 --> 00:09:26,881 victimless thing of ours. 217 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:30,735 I-I have signed a mutual honesty compact with them. 218 00:09:30,962 --> 00:09:32,887 Oh, look, your report card. 219 00:09:32,981 --> 00:09:34,739 Beautiful little A you've got here. 220 00:09:34,891 --> 00:09:36,299 (whimpers) 221 00:09:36,318 --> 00:09:38,893 Would be a shame if something happened to it. 222 00:09:38,987 --> 00:09:40,653 God, no! 223 00:09:40,822 --> 00:09:43,306 You sick bastard. 224 00:09:43,308 --> 00:09:46,918 Okay, okay. I'll keep your dirty video game secret. 225 00:09:47,070 --> 00:09:49,829 Oh, man is wolf to man. 226 00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:51,831 (cries) 227 00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:53,908 Skinner, are you feeling this? 228 00:09:53,927 --> 00:09:58,338 I know it's insane, but we're like a team. 229 00:09:58,432 --> 00:10:00,824 Working together, shared interests, 230 00:10:00,842 --> 00:10:02,416 we're more than a team. 231 00:10:02,436 --> 00:10:03,993 We're colleagues. 232 00:10:04,087 --> 00:10:05,678 Would you like to put your feet up on my desk 233 00:10:05,755 --> 00:10:07,564 as we daydream about our goals? 234 00:10:12,261 --> 00:10:13,612 (helicopter blades whirring) 235 00:10:13,763 --> 00:10:15,505 (chuckles) 236 00:10:15,523 --> 00:10:17,449 (both sigh) 237 00:10:21,196 --> 00:10:24,347 And top salesperson of the day goes to... 238 00:10:24,366 --> 00:10:27,125 Sherri, who unloaded 150 rainbow mohawks 239 00:10:27,276 --> 00:10:29,461 at ten Bobux a pop. 240 00:10:29,630 --> 00:10:31,278 (cheering) 241 00:10:31,373 --> 00:10:32,797 Couple more days like that, 242 00:10:33,024 --> 00:10:34,782 and you're getting the trip to Honolulu. 243 00:10:34,801 --> 00:10:35,859 (gasps) 244 00:10:35,952 --> 00:10:36,801 This is new. 245 00:10:36,953 --> 00:10:39,212 An ice cream truck. 246 00:10:39,364 --> 00:10:41,956 Wait, they're shooting ice cream at us. 247 00:10:42,050 --> 00:10:44,701 (grunting) 248 00:10:44,794 --> 00:10:47,128 BART: It's an ice cream drive-by. Run! 249 00:10:47,147 --> 00:10:48,872 (Milhouse panting) 250 00:10:48,965 --> 00:10:51,733 Oh, no. It's a trap. 251 00:10:53,136 --> 00:10:56,029 (Bart yells) 252 00:10:56,214 --> 00:10:58,156 Not unicorns. 253 00:10:58,233 --> 00:11:01,326 They're my second-favorite magical horse. 254 00:11:05,223 --> 00:11:07,314 JIMBO: "Boblox belongs to us." 255 00:11:07,334 --> 00:11:11,060 People, looks like we've got ourselves a turf war. 256 00:11:11,079 --> 00:11:13,296 (grunting) 257 00:11:19,087 --> 00:11:21,754 -Bad news, we've got competition. -Who? 258 00:11:21,907 --> 00:11:26,518 The Sunflower gang's IP address belongs to some place called... 259 00:11:26,669 --> 00:11:28,928 Limitless Frontier Horizons. 260 00:11:29,097 --> 00:11:30,246 Hmm, what do you know? 261 00:11:30,265 --> 00:11:32,649 The Montessori School. 262 00:11:40,926 --> 00:11:42,775 Check out the fancy groundskeepers. 263 00:11:42,928 --> 00:11:46,037 Those aren't groundskeepers. They're parent volunteers. 264 00:11:46,264 --> 00:11:48,932 Pay for tuition, then work for free. 265 00:11:49,025 --> 00:11:50,858 What a racket. 266 00:11:50,952 --> 00:11:52,769 (grumbles) 267 00:11:52,862 --> 00:11:54,771 Good morning, Principal Skinner. 268 00:11:54,864 --> 00:11:56,622 Hello, "kids-call-you-Sandra." 269 00:11:56,699 --> 00:11:58,717 Um... (clears throat) maybe you're not aware of this, 270 00:11:58,944 --> 00:12:01,052 but, uh, some of your students have been interfering 271 00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:04,781 with some of my kids', um, independent study project. 272 00:12:04,799 --> 00:12:08,560 Ooh, I'd love to help, but our curriculum is student-led. 273 00:12:08,787 --> 00:12:11,471 So if their passion is the monetization of coding errors, 274 00:12:11,565 --> 00:12:14,640 it's part of our core belief system that I support them. 275 00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:18,403 That's, uh, progressive school mumbo jumbo for "screw you." 276 00:12:18,630 --> 00:12:21,406 You can't tell me you want war with us. 277 00:12:21,575 --> 00:12:24,968 Um, well, "can't" is a word we don't use here. 278 00:12:24,986 --> 00:12:27,728 We also don't say "don't." We just can't. 279 00:12:27,822 --> 00:12:29,563 Are you even in charge? 280 00:12:29,657 --> 00:12:31,565 No! I just send out emails 281 00:12:31,585 --> 00:12:34,068 trying to convince parents there's a plan to all this. 282 00:12:34,162 --> 00:12:36,813 Oh, please come to our silent auction next week. 283 00:12:36,831 --> 00:12:38,982 One of our dads is Drake. 284 00:12:39,075 --> 00:12:41,150 He'll emcee but not perform. 285 00:12:41,319 --> 00:12:43,486 (sighs) That'll be all, Sandra. 286 00:12:43,505 --> 00:12:46,631 Oh, that is a really nice tower, Truth-Anne. 287 00:12:46,783 --> 00:12:48,600 Yeah, yeah, they're all nice. 288 00:12:48,827 --> 00:12:50,251 Let's take a walk. 289 00:12:50,345 --> 00:12:52,937 Let me show you what I've built here. 290 00:12:53,164 --> 00:12:55,665 From day one, these curiosity seekers have been told 291 00:12:55,683 --> 00:12:58,184 they can succeed at anything they set their mind to. 292 00:12:58,278 --> 00:13:00,612 Do you think you can win against that unbreakable, 293 00:13:00,781 --> 00:13:02,429 unearned self-confidence? 294 00:13:03,358 --> 00:13:06,284 Look, there's room in the Boblox scam for both of us. 295 00:13:06,453 --> 00:13:09,103 You take the gumdrop fields and teddy bear bouncy rooms. 296 00:13:09,197 --> 00:13:11,772 We keep the penguin fun land and the mushroom castles. 297 00:13:11,792 --> 00:13:15,609 Well, sharing is one of the habits of the heart. 298 00:13:15,703 --> 00:13:16,961 We accept. 299 00:13:17,113 --> 00:13:20,006 (chuckles) Can you excuse us for a moment? 300 00:13:22,210 --> 00:13:24,210 What the hell are you doing? 301 00:13:24,304 --> 00:13:26,212 What? We had to make a deal. 302 00:13:26,306 --> 00:13:29,140 With only half the money, there's no revolving stage, 303 00:13:29,292 --> 00:13:31,125 no flying wire harness system. 304 00:13:31,219 --> 00:13:33,127 Good luck doing Angels in America. 305 00:13:33,146 --> 00:13:35,129 We can't go to war with these psychos. 306 00:13:35,223 --> 00:13:37,040 Their self-esteem is off the charts. 307 00:13:37,133 --> 00:13:38,299 Take the deal. 308 00:13:38,393 --> 00:13:40,393 (groans) 309 00:13:41,321 --> 00:13:45,139 So, fellow lifelong learners, do we have an understanding? 310 00:13:45,233 --> 00:13:47,884 Yes, uh, we have an understanding. 311 00:13:47,977 --> 00:13:49,552 Understand this: 312 00:13:49,571 --> 00:13:52,813 "When you come at the king, you best not miss." 313 00:13:52,907 --> 00:13:55,482 (chuckles): You're going to quote The Wire to me? 314 00:13:55,502 --> 00:13:59,337 My dad directed three episodes in the dockyards season. 315 00:13:59,488 --> 00:14:02,248 That season was slow, and also: 316 00:14:02,417 --> 00:14:04,917 This. Is. War. 317 00:14:05,070 --> 00:14:06,219 (groans) 318 00:14:13,502 --> 00:14:15,745 Look, we can still get a deal with these guys. 319 00:14:15,763 --> 00:14:17,355 -Let's just go back in there and... -You're out. 320 00:14:17,582 --> 00:14:18,915 -What? -You don't have the stones 321 00:14:18,933 --> 00:14:20,692 for the mohawk trade. 322 00:14:20,861 --> 00:14:22,360 You can't fire me. 323 00:14:22,511 --> 00:14:24,863 You're right, people who are fired get a severance. 324 00:14:25,090 --> 00:14:26,772 You get nothing. 325 00:14:26,867 --> 00:14:29,108 This is my grift. I brought you in. 326 00:14:29,202 --> 00:14:30,851 It's all in the game, son. 327 00:14:30,871 --> 00:14:34,447 All in the video game game. 328 00:14:34,599 --> 00:14:37,100 Those self-esteem punks are gunning for us. 329 00:14:37,118 --> 00:14:39,118 I need a ruthless, bloodthirsty general. 330 00:14:39,287 --> 00:14:42,714 -Milhouse, you're up. -(spits, coughs) 331 00:14:42,790 --> 00:14:45,625 Me? But what about Bart? 332 00:14:45,777 --> 00:14:47,218 (scoffs) He's history, 333 00:14:47,370 --> 00:14:49,053 and this school doesn't teach history. 334 00:14:49,280 --> 00:14:51,614 Do it and you'll never have to play dodgeball again. 335 00:14:51,633 --> 00:14:55,042 And I get the pretty teacher for fifth grade. 336 00:14:55,136 --> 00:14:58,897 -Mrs. McCarthy? -You know who I'm talking about. 337 00:14:59,124 --> 00:15:01,357 Mm. Ms. Tanaka. 338 00:15:03,052 --> 00:15:05,128 Let's hit these sunflowers where it hurts. 339 00:15:05,146 --> 00:15:08,481 They steal our princess tiaras, we kill their unicorns. 340 00:15:08,650 --> 00:15:10,133 They strangle our gnomes, 341 00:15:10,151 --> 00:15:11,743 we glitter-bomb their pumpkin patch. 342 00:15:11,970 --> 00:15:13,745 So get out there and paint the streets 343 00:15:13,896 --> 00:15:15,988 with the blood of tomorrow's leaders. 344 00:15:16,141 --> 00:15:18,249 ASTRID AND FRENCH FRY: Let's talk Boblox! 345 00:15:18,418 --> 00:15:20,585 Hey, everybody! It's me, Astrid. 346 00:15:20,812 --> 00:15:22,587 And it's me, French Fry! 347 00:15:22,814 --> 00:15:24,480 -Hi, Astrid. -Hi, French Fry. 348 00:15:24,499 --> 00:15:26,907 Have you been seeing all this craziness in Boblox? 349 00:15:27,001 --> 00:15:28,501 It's so crazy. 350 00:15:28,653 --> 00:15:30,111 The Springfield kids were selling mohawks, 351 00:15:30,171 --> 00:15:32,004 but so were the Montessori Sunflower kids, 352 00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:33,656 so they got in a gang war. 353 00:15:33,675 --> 00:15:36,509 Everyone is being so grouchy, makes me sad. 354 00:15:36,661 --> 00:15:38,919 Check out what happened to the Springfield kids 355 00:15:39,013 --> 00:15:40,179 at the Candyland. 356 00:15:41,182 --> 00:15:43,424 I like bears, but this one looks mean. 357 00:15:43,443 --> 00:15:45,184 (growling) 358 00:15:45,336 --> 00:15:47,336 -Aah! -Ew. He was mean. 359 00:15:47,430 --> 00:15:49,338 You are always right about bears. 360 00:15:49,507 --> 00:15:51,340 Don't ever rip me in half, French Fry. 361 00:15:51,434 --> 00:15:53,934 (gasps) I would never, Astrid. 362 00:15:54,028 --> 00:15:55,845 BOTH: Online friends forever! 363 00:15:55,863 --> 00:15:58,514 Oh, look, it's a fashion show. 364 00:15:58,533 --> 00:16:00,349 I love fashion shows. 365 00:16:00,443 --> 00:16:02,943 This Nelson guy looks so cute in a vest. 366 00:16:02,963 --> 00:16:04,253 Cutie alert! 367 00:16:06,040 --> 00:16:09,300 Ouch. That Sunflower kid is stabbing him. 368 00:16:09,527 --> 00:16:10,543 Stabbing's for jerks. 369 00:16:10,637 --> 00:16:12,378 The Springfield gang is getting wiped out. 370 00:16:12,472 --> 00:16:15,531 Astrid, why are candy canes only for Christmas? 371 00:16:15,624 --> 00:16:16,882 Great question. 372 00:16:16,977 --> 00:16:18,718 Subscribers, post your theories. 373 00:16:18,886 --> 00:16:20,627 No racist stuff, you guys. 374 00:16:20,722 --> 00:16:22,438 BOTH: Bye! 375 00:16:24,392 --> 00:16:27,735 HOMER: We did it. We made our house in Boblox. 376 00:16:28,804 --> 00:16:31,823 Aw, I wish Lisa were here, too. 377 00:16:32,050 --> 00:16:33,974 Guys, you've been in this game so long 378 00:16:33,994 --> 00:16:35,309 that, out in the real world, 379 00:16:35,403 --> 00:16:37,720 the lawn is overgrown, Bart bought a Lexus, 380 00:16:37,813 --> 00:16:40,890 and I had to go to my own parent-teacher conference. 381 00:16:40,908 --> 00:16:44,651 Turns out I'm a joy to have in class and I might need glasses. 382 00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:47,580 Guess what, honey. Maggie talks in here. 383 00:16:48,733 --> 00:16:52,826 Whoa, Maggie, you're communicating using only emojis, 384 00:16:52,846 --> 00:16:55,179 like an old person trying to act like a teenager. 385 00:16:55,331 --> 00:16:58,591 Ha! And, Dad, you're not at Moe's? 386 00:16:58,685 --> 00:17:00,243 Why would I be at Moe's 387 00:17:00,245 --> 00:17:02,186 when we can play volleyball with my head? 388 00:17:02,413 --> 00:17:03,312 (grunts) 389 00:17:04,098 --> 00:17:06,357 -Whee! -(laughter) 390 00:17:06,526 --> 00:17:09,676 Who would have thought that our family would be happiest 391 00:17:09,696 --> 00:17:11,437 inside a video game? 392 00:17:11,531 --> 00:17:14,181 HOMER: It's heaven, and it's all from the comfort 393 00:17:14,275 --> 00:17:17,285 of my real-life toilet. 394 00:17:21,207 --> 00:17:24,658 ♪ My dream of a theater ♪ 395 00:17:24,769 --> 00:17:27,286 ♪ Has turned out so cool ♪ 396 00:17:27,380 --> 00:17:32,291 ♪ The moment has come for my magnet ♪ 397 00:17:32,443 --> 00:17:37,388 ♪ Performing arts school. ♪ 398 00:17:38,449 --> 00:17:40,058 We're getting butchered everywhere! 399 00:17:40,209 --> 00:17:42,560 Good God. What about our revenue stream? 400 00:17:42,787 --> 00:17:44,729 They've taken it all. 401 00:17:48,050 --> 00:17:50,142 Hmm. I'm gonna show these kids 402 00:17:50,295 --> 00:17:53,053 something they have no idea exists: 403 00:17:53,147 --> 00:17:55,364 the real world! 404 00:17:56,725 --> 00:17:57,800 (grunts) 405 00:17:57,893 --> 00:17:59,151 Ah, stupid Skinner. 406 00:17:59,320 --> 00:18:00,894 I'm done trying to make money out of nothing. 407 00:18:00,988 --> 00:18:02,896 I'm going all in on NFTs. 408 00:18:02,990 --> 00:18:04,665 (phone chimes) 409 00:18:07,995 --> 00:18:09,812 (groans) 410 00:18:09,905 --> 00:18:12,423 (gasps) Apathetic face emoji? 411 00:18:16,745 --> 00:18:19,322 Arts school! 412 00:18:19,415 --> 00:18:22,174 He's destroyed the community wasabi garden. 413 00:18:22,251 --> 00:18:24,160 He's heading for the computer lab. 414 00:18:24,178 --> 00:18:26,479 What kind of nurturing is this? 415 00:18:28,775 --> 00:18:29,923 Whoa, whoa, whoa. 416 00:18:29,943 --> 00:18:32,184 Out of my way. 417 00:18:32,337 --> 00:18:33,945 Don't do this, Seymour. 418 00:18:34,172 --> 00:18:35,521 Oh, I'm doing it. 419 00:18:35,615 --> 00:18:38,674 If I crush their computer lab, we beat these psychos. 420 00:18:38,693 --> 00:18:41,768 Look at yourself. You're about to bulldoze a school. 421 00:18:41,788 --> 00:18:44,455 They took Daddy's money... 422 00:18:44,682 --> 00:18:46,682 (engine revving) 423 00:18:46,684 --> 00:18:48,275 ...and I'm the daddy! 424 00:18:48,294 --> 00:18:51,612 What's happening? We're in unchartered school territory. 425 00:18:51,706 --> 00:18:53,356 (clucks) 426 00:18:53,374 --> 00:18:55,358 I've spent the best years of your life 427 00:18:55,376 --> 00:18:57,135 trying to drive you insane, 428 00:18:57,286 --> 00:18:59,044 and now I don't want that. 429 00:18:59,197 --> 00:19:01,139 This isn't you. You're not a psycho. 430 00:19:01,215 --> 00:19:04,200 You're lame, like unfrosted cornflakes. 431 00:19:04,293 --> 00:19:06,293 But I want to be Lucky Charms. 432 00:19:06,312 --> 00:19:09,463 It's okay. Corn Flakes is a surprisingly good cereal. 433 00:19:09,557 --> 00:19:11,983 But crushing this kombucha academy, 434 00:19:12,210 --> 00:19:14,043 that'll ruin your life. 435 00:19:14,136 --> 00:19:16,470 And being partners with you has made me realize 436 00:19:16,564 --> 00:19:18,805 you're... a human being. 437 00:19:18,883 --> 00:19:20,049 No, I'm not. 438 00:19:20,142 --> 00:19:22,476 You are. Walk away. 439 00:19:22,495 --> 00:19:25,163 But I already rented the costumes for Seussical. 440 00:19:26,166 --> 00:19:27,832 It was never meant to be. 441 00:19:28,059 --> 00:19:30,001 But... Josh Gad. 442 00:19:30,228 --> 00:19:31,669 Josh Gad is not real. 443 00:19:31,820 --> 00:19:33,320 He never was. 444 00:19:33,339 --> 00:19:36,465 (sighs) Right, of course he's not. 445 00:19:38,069 --> 00:19:41,253 (backup alarm beeping) 446 00:19:41,406 --> 00:19:43,514 Maybe there's a teachable moment here. 447 00:19:43,741 --> 00:19:47,593 In a sense, the bulldozer is Anglo-Saxon privilege. 448 00:19:47,762 --> 00:19:49,094 You're fired, Sandra. 449 00:19:49,247 --> 00:19:51,171 Oh, thank you! 450 00:19:51,265 --> 00:19:53,524 Come on, let's head to Krusty Burger. 451 00:19:53,676 --> 00:19:55,026 I'll buy you a shake 452 00:19:55,177 --> 00:19:57,010 and you can tell me about your other stupid dreams 453 00:19:57,104 --> 00:19:58,362 that will never happen. 454 00:19:58,514 --> 00:20:01,365 No, Bart, I'm done living in a fantasy world, 455 00:20:01,592 --> 00:20:05,185 because a fantasy world is no place to live. 456 00:20:05,354 --> 00:20:07,020 Sorry to bother you, neighborinos, but, uh, 457 00:20:07,189 --> 00:20:09,707 the newspapers have been stacking up on your porch. 458 00:20:09,858 --> 00:20:12,585 I just thought I'd peek in and give you a lookie-loo. 459 00:20:14,363 --> 00:20:16,297 Hello? 460 00:20:20,945 --> 00:20:22,595 Mm... 461 00:20:23,723 --> 00:20:25,556 (whimpers) 462 00:20:26,617 --> 00:20:28,226 Captioning sponsored by 20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION 463 00:20:28,377 --> 00:20:30,119 and FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY 464 00:20:30,137 --> 00:20:31,787 and TOYOTA. 465 00:20:31,789 --> 00:20:33,731 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 466 00:20:38,463 --> 00:20:40,529 ("Way Down in the Hole" by The Blind Boys of Alabama playing) 467 00:20:42,467 --> 00:20:46,393 ♪ If you walk through the garden ♪ 468 00:20:46,412 --> 00:20:49,455 ♪ You better watch your back ♪ 469 00:20:50,399 --> 00:20:53,567 ♪ Well, I beg your pardon ♪ 470 00:20:53,586 --> 00:20:57,129 ♪ Walk a straight and narrow track ♪ 471 00:20:58,165 --> 00:21:01,092 ♪ If you walk with Jesus ♪ 472 00:21:02,244 --> 00:21:05,763 ♪ He'll save your soul ♪ 473 00:21:05,990 --> 00:21:09,082 ♪ You gotta keep the devil ♪ 474 00:21:09,160 --> 00:21:12,495 ♪ Down in the hole ♪ 475 00:21:12,663 --> 00:21:15,848 ♪ All the angels sing ♪ 476 00:21:15,942 --> 00:21:19,335 ♪ About Jesus' mighty sword ♪ 477 00:21:19,428 --> 00:21:24,023 ♪ And they'll shield you with their wings ♪ 478 00:21:24,191 --> 00:21:27,768 ♪ Keep you close to the Lord. ♪ 479 00:21:27,862 --> 00:21:29,745 Shh!