1 00:00:06,285 --> 00:00:08,344 The Simpsons S19E11 - That '90s Show - 2 00:00:36,038 --> 00:00:37,842 Dad, I'm freezing. 3 00:00:37,843 --> 00:00:39,149 Don't worry, kids. 4 00:00:39,150 --> 00:00:42,934 These wool socks and down parkas will keep you warm. 5 00:00:46,546 --> 00:00:48,407 We wouldn't be in this trouble if you'd just 6 00:00:48,408 --> 00:00:49,737 paid the heating bill! 7 00:00:49,738 --> 00:00:52,198 I thought global warming would take care of it. 8 00:00:52,199 --> 00:00:54,342 Al Gore can't do anything right. 9 00:00:54,368 --> 00:00:56,082 I got some old magazines to burn. 10 00:00:56,366 --> 00:00:57,720 Popular Science. 11 00:00:58,934 --> 00:00:59,889 Redbook. 12 00:01:00,829 --> 00:01:03,164 Big & Tall Halloween Costume catalogue. 13 00:01:04,296 --> 00:01:05,251 Next item. 14 00:01:05,339 --> 00:01:06,252 No!!!!! 15 00:01:11,957 --> 00:01:14,660 Mom, I didn't know you went to college! 16 00:01:14,678 --> 00:01:16,441 Yeah, you always said that after high school, 17 00:01:16,448 --> 00:01:19,670 Dad "blessed" you with the unplanned miracle of me. 18 00:01:19,688 --> 00:01:23,313 Hey, parents are allowed to keep some secrets. 19 00:01:23,375 --> 00:01:25,210 Like which kid's their favorite! 20 00:01:25,327 --> 00:01:26,280 It's Lisa. 21 00:01:27,736 --> 00:01:32,543 You know, Mom and Dad are almost 40, and Bart is ten. 22 00:01:33,455 --> 00:01:36,373 That means you didn't have him until way after high school. 23 00:01:36,388 --> 00:01:39,050 Yeah, what happened while I was chillin' in Dad's junk? 24 00:01:39,057 --> 00:01:41,062 There is a part of our past that 25 00:01:41,067 --> 00:01:43,221 we haven't told you kids about. 26 00:01:43,246 --> 00:01:45,040 A turbulent part. 27 00:01:45,077 --> 00:01:47,412 Come on. More turbulent than now? 28 00:01:47,427 --> 00:01:49,483 We're in every kind of therapy. 29 00:01:49,486 --> 00:01:52,340 Things happened between your mother and me that we're not proud of. 30 00:01:52,366 --> 00:01:55,960 It was the middle of a wild decade known as the 1990s. 31 00:01:56,016 --> 00:01:57,742 The '90s? Never heard of it. 32 00:01:57,767 --> 00:01:59,973 Oh, it was a wonderful time. 33 00:01:59,978 --> 00:02:02,400 The Iraq war was over once and for all, 34 00:02:02,408 --> 00:02:05,361 a struggling Matt Groening created Futurama, 35 00:02:05,586 --> 00:02:07,902 and young people believed in their dreams, 36 00:02:07,925 --> 00:02:11,700 thanks to a TV show called Melrose Place. 37 00:02:12,438 --> 00:02:13,961 Your mother and I were dating, 38 00:02:13,966 --> 00:02:15,330 and we had just moved into 39 00:02:15,335 --> 00:02:16,940 our first apartment together. 40 00:02:21,306 --> 00:02:23,281 Luann, a picture of you cheating on me 41 00:02:23,288 --> 00:02:25,023 is downloading onto my computer. 42 00:02:25,046 --> 00:02:27,870 I'll know who you were with in less than six hours! 43 00:02:27,925 --> 00:02:29,730 Unless someone picks up the phone. 44 00:02:29,746 --> 00:02:31,280 No, no, no, no! Oh! 45 00:02:31,915 --> 00:02:33,461 We didn't have a lot of money, 46 00:02:33,466 --> 00:02:35,273 but we were young and in love. 47 00:02:37,207 --> 00:02:37,992 Oh! 48 00:02:37,996 --> 00:02:40,141 I'm afraid it's Top Ramen again. 49 00:02:40,156 --> 00:02:41,080 With you, baby, 50 00:02:41,088 --> 00:02:43,662 Top Ramen tastes like Cup O' Noodles. 51 00:02:46,378 --> 00:02:51,250 You know, these IKEA foam futons do Velcro together. 52 00:02:51,916 --> 00:02:53,310 Uh, I-I'm sorry. 53 00:02:53,328 --> 00:02:55,152 I'm not ready to do that yet. 54 00:02:55,196 --> 00:02:56,903 I want to wait until I'm married, 55 00:02:56,916 --> 00:02:58,210 or at least really drunk. 56 00:02:58,285 --> 00:02:59,212 I understand. 57 00:02:59,217 --> 00:03:02,122 We should follow the lead of today's celebrity role models. 58 00:03:02,137 --> 00:03:03,792 Sonic The hedghog says "Wait until marriage". 59 00:03:03,875 --> 00:03:05,253 Like all young people, 60 00:03:05,255 --> 00:03:06,461 I had a musical dream, 61 00:03:06,466 --> 00:03:08,590 a dream called inoffensive urban light 62 00:03:08,595 --> 00:03:10,280 hip-hop smooth grooves. 63 00:03:10,286 --> 00:03:12,722 Okay, everyone, let's warm up our harmonies. 64 00:03:12,725 --> 00:03:14,223 Homer 65 00:03:14,228 --> 00:03:15,370 Lenny 66 00:03:15,375 --> 00:03:16,332 Carl 67 00:03:16,338 --> 00:03:17,890 Lou the Cop 68 00:03:19,998 --> 00:03:24,810 I'll make rub to you Show respect for you 69 00:03:24,915 --> 00:03:30,181 Hug so safe and strong Backrub all night long ! 70 00:03:30,187 --> 00:03:32,590 I'll make rub to you! 71 00:03:32,606 --> 00:03:35,470 But our happiness was about to unravel 72 00:03:35,476 --> 00:03:37,980 just like Kevin Costner's career: 73 00:03:37,996 --> 00:03:40,100 because of the postman. 74 00:03:40,575 --> 00:03:42,031 You applied to college? 75 00:03:42,036 --> 00:03:43,312 Why didn't you tell me? 76 00:03:43,327 --> 00:03:44,551 I did tell you. 77 00:03:44,566 --> 00:03:46,422 I thought you were telling me you wanted 78 00:03:46,427 --> 00:03:48,990 to apply yourself to making a collage. 79 00:03:49,007 --> 00:03:50,610 And as I recall, I was against it. 80 00:03:50,616 --> 00:03:52,521 I can't believe I got in. 81 00:03:52,525 --> 00:03:54,502 It's like a dream come true. 82 00:03:54,967 --> 00:03:57,232 An expensive dream. 83 00:04:01,378 --> 00:04:04,000 Oh, baby, you deserve every last bit of it! 84 00:04:04,007 --> 00:04:05,160 I can get the money, 85 00:04:05,225 --> 00:04:07,840 but it'll mean swallowing my pride and working for... 86 00:04:07,987 --> 00:04:09,442 my dad! 87 00:04:10,477 --> 00:04:12,171 Well, Well, Well, 88 00:04:12,175 --> 00:04:15,802 look who's come crawling back to work for your old man. 89 00:04:15,817 --> 00:04:17,521 What do you need the money for? 90 00:04:17,557 --> 00:04:19,123 Medicine? 91 00:04:19,126 --> 00:04:20,221 None of your business. 92 00:04:20,246 --> 00:04:22,062 Now give me a job at your business. 93 00:04:22,066 --> 00:04:22,890 You're dead! 94 00:04:22,895 --> 00:04:24,310 Die! Die! Die! 95 00:04:24,317 --> 00:04:25,302 Suck my beam! 96 00:04:26,746 --> 00:04:29,193 Okay, all right! Time's up! 97 00:04:35,038 --> 00:04:36,912 This counts as your break. 98 00:04:36,916 --> 00:04:39,000 But Marge's education was worth 99 00:04:39,008 --> 00:04:41,952 all the pistol-whipping in the world. 100 00:04:42,126 --> 00:04:44,560 This place is just like the brochure: 101 00:04:44,565 --> 00:04:46,320 Autumn leaves. 102 00:04:46,325 --> 00:04:47,951 Bull sessions. 103 00:04:47,956 --> 00:04:49,273 And that is why 104 00:04:49,276 --> 00:04:51,761 The Lord of the Rings can never be filmed. 105 00:04:51,818 --> 00:04:54,703 Fraternity pledges in their beanies. 106 00:04:54,738 --> 00:04:57,822 I think I'm gonna like it here. 107 00:05:00,586 --> 00:05:04,240 So, have you all bought the required textbooks for this class? 108 00:05:05,197 --> 00:05:05,723 Good. 109 00:05:05,836 --> 00:05:07,762 Now throw them all away! 110 00:05:11,685 --> 00:05:14,530 Everything you think you know about history is a lie. 111 00:05:14,546 --> 00:05:17,261 For example: the Founding Fathers. 112 00:05:17,315 --> 00:05:18,523 What did they have in common? 113 00:05:18,525 --> 00:05:19,510 They defied a king? 114 00:05:19,515 --> 00:05:21,913 They created a system of checks and balances? 115 00:05:21,955 --> 00:05:22,751 Wrong! 116 00:05:22,756 --> 00:05:26,523 They were all white, Protestant, property-owning males. 117 00:05:28,926 --> 00:05:30,240 Evil 118 00:05:32,868 --> 00:05:37,903 Are you saying that America was founded on misconceptions? 119 00:05:38,178 --> 00:05:39,122 Who said that? 120 00:05:44,908 --> 00:05:47,983 That is exactly what I'm saying. 121 00:05:49,257 --> 00:05:52,623 Fall semester, you just got interesting. 122 00:05:53,506 --> 00:05:54,831 The bridges of Madison county. 123 00:05:56,175 --> 00:05:58,770 This book sucks so much. 124 00:05:58,775 --> 00:06:01,952 Homie, my mind has been opened in so many ways! 125 00:06:01,956 --> 00:06:04,120 Did you know that every US president 126 00:06:04,128 --> 00:06:06,273 has been a straight white man? 127 00:06:06,277 --> 00:06:07,893 Even Walt Disney? 128 00:06:07,907 --> 00:06:11,112 And did you also know that history is written by the winners? 129 00:06:11,117 --> 00:06:11,613 Really? 130 00:06:11,627 --> 00:06:13,480 I thought it was written by losers. 131 00:06:16,655 --> 00:06:17,700 If you think that, 132 00:06:17,717 --> 00:06:19,251 you should meet my new professor. 133 00:06:19,258 --> 00:06:23,181 Professor August has shown me a side of the world I never knew. 134 00:06:23,216 --> 00:06:24,651 Professor August, eh? 135 00:06:24,656 --> 00:06:26,991 Who is he, somegray-haired old bookworm? 136 00:06:27,547 --> 00:06:29,042 Uh, not exactly. 137 00:06:29,047 --> 00:06:29,840 Marge, 138 00:06:29,846 --> 00:06:32,680 I hope I'll be seeing you tomorrow during office hours. 139 00:06:34,788 --> 00:06:36,561 Uh, 3:00 to 5:00, right? 140 00:06:36,595 --> 00:06:38,770 If my beads are parted, come right in. 141 00:06:38,815 --> 00:06:40,450 I will! 142 00:06:43,008 --> 00:06:44,822 To the faculty club! 143 00:06:48,635 --> 00:06:50,690 I never heard that noise before. 144 00:06:50,694 --> 00:06:51,769 Are you sick? 145 00:06:53,049 --> 00:06:56,274 Hmm. I wonder what's on your mind. 146 00:07:01,626 --> 00:07:03,581 Okay, I relate your pilot light. 147 00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:06,072 Now I just need to do a little work on the thermostat. 148 00:07:06,265 --> 00:07:08,370 Would you like me to tell you a story while I work? 149 00:07:08,375 --> 00:07:10,620 One about a woman I loved and lost? 150 00:07:10,627 --> 00:07:12,750 We're in the middle of our own story, thank you. 151 00:07:12,756 --> 00:07:15,561 Right. No one wants to hear about the gasman's girl. 152 00:07:15,606 --> 00:07:18,501 "Just shut up, monkey man, and make the gas flow. " 153 00:07:18,506 --> 00:07:21,062 Anyway, I was growing to admire 154 00:07:21,068 --> 00:07:23,590 my professor more and more. 155 00:07:23,808 --> 00:07:26,073 ...so that's why instead of "X-X", 156 00:07:26,075 --> 00:07:29,231 I think of the female genes in a more positive light... 157 00:07:30,828 --> 00:07:32,151 Plus-Plus. 158 00:07:33,716 --> 00:07:37,073 Professor, do you think white male scientists 159 00:07:37,076 --> 00:07:40,872 have marginalized the contributions of the Third World? 160 00:07:40,878 --> 00:07:41,691 Great question. 161 00:07:41,706 --> 00:07:43,660 And the answer is "of course." 162 00:07:43,696 --> 00:07:46,070 Could a tribe of bushmen have invented penicillin? 163 00:07:46,078 --> 00:07:47,381 Maybe they already have. 164 00:07:47,387 --> 00:07:48,712 But no one asked them. 165 00:07:48,966 --> 00:07:50,821 No one asked them. 166 00:07:57,015 --> 00:08:01,592 Oh, Elaine, will you ever find someone who's sponge-worthy? 167 00:08:01,605 --> 00:08:05,511 Professor August says the situation comedy is a doomed genre. 168 00:08:05,516 --> 00:08:06,883 Here's what I say to that: 169 00:08:06,896 --> 00:08:07,733 no soup for you! 170 00:08:07,736 --> 00:08:10,580 Because I am "master of my domain". 171 00:08:10,587 --> 00:08:12,240 Newman. 172 00:08:12,247 --> 00:08:14,672 I wish you would support my comments. 173 00:08:14,677 --> 00:08:17,332 Hey, I worked hard all day to pay for your education. 174 00:08:17,337 --> 00:08:19,022 Can't I get all Zima'd up and have 175 00:08:19,027 --> 00:08:21,432 my best girl put salve on my laser burns? 176 00:08:22,048 --> 00:08:24,432 Are the lasers supposed to burn you? 177 00:08:24,446 --> 00:08:26,110 Apparently if all the kids fire 178 00:08:26,115 --> 00:08:28,510 at your stomach at once, it adds up. 179 00:08:44,175 --> 00:08:49,182 Closing time open all the doors 180 00:08:49,195 --> 00:08:53,812 and let you out into the world... 181 00:08:56,216 --> 00:08:59,642 Marge, your art project for "protest studies" is very impressive. 182 00:09:02,345 --> 00:09:04,520 Thank you, Professor August. 183 00:09:04,526 --> 00:09:06,291 Oh, please, I'm your advisor. 184 00:09:06,297 --> 00:09:07,460 Call me Steffan. 185 00:09:09,886 --> 00:09:11,273 Oh, thanks. 186 00:09:11,277 --> 00:09:13,523 It-it's just a note from my boyfriend. 187 00:09:13,526 --> 00:09:14,381 Let me guess: 188 00:09:14,386 --> 00:09:15,732 he's a high school flame 189 00:09:15,735 --> 00:09:17,223 who's preventing you from flowering. 190 00:09:17,226 --> 00:09:18,803 Homer's perfect for me! 191 00:09:18,807 --> 00:09:20,112 Just look at this note: 192 00:09:20,145 --> 00:09:22,020 "I miss you". Aww. 193 00:09:22,137 --> 00:09:24,942 Actually, Marge, if I may deconstruct that letter. 194 00:09:24,947 --> 00:09:26,743 When he writes "I miss you," 195 00:09:26,745 --> 00:09:29,611 "I" is the subject and "you" is the object. 196 00:09:29,616 --> 00:09:31,732 You are his object. 197 00:09:31,738 --> 00:09:33,493 But Homer's so supportive. 198 00:09:33,497 --> 00:09:35,722 He's paying for me to go to college. 199 00:09:35,726 --> 00:09:37,141 He's paying for you? 200 00:09:37,147 --> 00:09:38,441 Like he owns you? 201 00:09:38,446 --> 00:09:40,401 I'm sorry, but that is oppression. 202 00:09:40,405 --> 00:09:43,442 Well, I know you'd never say anything that isn't objective... 203 00:09:43,445 --> 00:09:45,241 Marge, your assignment is to think about 204 00:09:45,247 --> 00:09:47,343 what I've said about your relationship. 205 00:09:47,348 --> 00:09:48,572 When is it due? 206 00:09:48,586 --> 00:09:50,890 Before it's too late. 207 00:09:50,977 --> 00:09:52,491 Steffan! 208 00:09:53,236 --> 00:09:54,253 Marge! Marge! 209 00:09:54,255 --> 00:09:55,310 Where are you?! 210 00:09:56,777 --> 00:09:59,893 Are you by that Joan Miro Statue? 211 00:09:59,905 --> 00:10:01,760 lt's "Juan" Miro! 212 00:10:01,777 --> 00:10:03,412 Stupid townie! 213 00:10:04,545 --> 00:10:07,211 Hey, it's townies like me that cook your food and 214 00:10:07,216 --> 00:10:08,140 clean your bathrooms! 215 00:10:08,147 --> 00:10:11,950 If you did the former better we'd use the latter less. 216 00:10:13,076 --> 00:10:14,553 That's it, townie! 217 00:10:14,555 --> 00:10:15,222 Run! 218 00:10:15,266 --> 00:10:17,172 Run back to your town! 219 00:10:17,177 --> 00:10:20,312 Marge, this dreamcatcher was given to me by a warrior 220 00:10:20,318 --> 00:10:23,423 of the Lakopane tribe, a tribe ruled by women. 221 00:10:23,426 --> 00:10:25,423 I think it has already caught my dream. 222 00:10:29,985 --> 00:10:31,722 What the hell is going on here? 223 00:10:31,726 --> 00:10:32,580 Chanting?! 224 00:10:32,587 --> 00:10:34,511 Homer! You're embarrassing me! 225 00:10:34,567 --> 00:10:36,981 Marge, what are you doing in this crazy college? 226 00:10:36,985 --> 00:10:39,310 This place is nothing like Animal House! 227 00:10:39,316 --> 00:10:42,952 I smashed a beatnik's guitar and he sued me for damages! 228 00:10:43,117 --> 00:10:44,883 Successfully! 229 00:10:44,887 --> 00:10:46,391 Homie, go home. 230 00:10:46,395 --> 00:10:47,961 We'll talk about this later. 231 00:10:47,965 --> 00:10:48,692 Fine! 232 00:10:51,338 --> 00:10:52,291 Slam! 233 00:10:59,166 --> 00:11:00,241 I can't do it! 234 00:11:00,308 --> 00:11:01,921 Our harmony-laden R&B doesn't 235 00:11:01,926 --> 00:11:03,652 make sense in this cruel world. 236 00:11:03,665 --> 00:11:05,580 I'm taking our music to the next level: 237 00:11:05,625 --> 00:11:09,891 Guitar Rock Utilizing Nihilist Grunge Energies. 238 00:11:09,896 --> 00:11:12,531 Or, as I call it: Grunge! 239 00:11:12,535 --> 00:11:14,831 We are Sadgasm, 240 00:11:14,835 --> 00:11:16,531 and this song is called... 241 00:11:16,537 --> 00:11:18,600 "Politically Incorrect." 242 00:11:27,108 --> 00:11:30,373 Pain is brown 243 00:11:31,068 --> 00:11:34,270 Hate is white 244 00:11:35,298 --> 00:11:38,322 Love is black 245 00:11:39,646 --> 00:11:42,431 Stab the night 246 00:11:44,778 --> 00:11:47,112 Kingdom of numb 247 00:11:48,896 --> 00:11:51,083 Closet of hurt 248 00:11:52,988 --> 00:11:55,553 Feelings are dumb 249 00:11:57,216 --> 00:11:59,603 Kisses are dirt... 250 00:11:59,648 --> 00:12:00,603 Kurt? Kurt? 251 00:12:00,626 --> 00:12:01,520 It's Marvin! 252 00:12:01,545 --> 00:12:03,781 Your cousin, Marvin Cobain! 253 00:12:03,788 --> 00:12:05,640 You know that new sound you're looking for? 254 00:12:05,648 --> 00:12:06,952 Well, listen to this! 255 00:12:11,238 --> 00:12:12,751 Marge! Marge! 256 00:12:15,975 --> 00:12:17,192 Hey, Marge. 257 00:12:17,197 --> 00:12:20,153 Homer, your music is so angry and bitter. 258 00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:21,732 Now why would I be angry and bitter? 259 00:12:21,737 --> 00:12:23,712 Because I'm paying for you to make goo-goo eyes 260 00:12:23,716 --> 00:12:25,682 at some smooth-talking professor? 261 00:12:25,688 --> 00:12:27,071 Well, here's a question for you: 262 00:12:27,077 --> 00:12:30,363 why should I stay with a man who resents how I've flowered? 263 00:12:30,366 --> 00:12:32,272 Well, if you feel that way maybe you can find 264 00:12:32,287 --> 00:12:34,533 someone who wants to nurture the new you, 265 00:12:34,536 --> 00:12:37,270 maybe someone a little older and more sophisticated, 266 00:12:37,275 --> 00:12:40,420 who can take you to Europe during the summer. 267 00:12:40,428 --> 00:12:42,283 - Fine by me. - D'oh! 268 00:12:46,537 --> 00:12:48,811 Hey. Will you sign my boobs? 269 00:12:48,838 --> 00:12:49,691 Yeah. 270 00:12:50,006 --> 00:12:51,691 Marge come back. 271 00:12:55,756 --> 00:12:58,921 Mom, why did you stop talking for two and a half minutes? 272 00:12:58,925 --> 00:13:00,462 It seemed like 20. 273 00:13:00,465 --> 00:13:01,211 Whatever. 274 00:13:01,216 --> 00:13:03,383 Homer and I had the wrenching task 275 00:13:03,387 --> 00:13:05,721 of dividing up a shared life. 276 00:13:06,658 --> 00:13:09,661 Okay, I'll keep the LPs, and you take the CDs. 277 00:13:09,665 --> 00:13:11,941 I'll take the typewriter; you take the computer. 278 00:13:11,948 --> 00:13:15,022 I'll take the Enron stock; you take the Microsoft stock. 279 00:13:15,027 --> 00:13:15,900 And, um... 280 00:13:15,908 --> 00:13:18,213 Who gets... Cutie-puss? 281 00:13:18,728 --> 00:13:20,903 I just want a tentacle. 282 00:13:34,248 --> 00:13:36,000 I was so depressed, 283 00:13:36,006 --> 00:13:38,752 I spent all my time in a bar. 284 00:13:38,777 --> 00:13:40,003 Gimme a beer, Moe. 285 00:13:40,008 --> 00:13:41,473 I don't sell booze no more. 286 00:13:41,496 --> 00:13:43,243 This is a cigar bar now. 287 00:13:44,666 --> 00:13:46,471 Fine. Cohiba me. 288 00:13:48,348 --> 00:13:49,303 Leave the humidor. 289 00:13:54,846 --> 00:13:56,441 I don't feel so good. 290 00:14:01,986 --> 00:14:03,570 I wasn't trying to steal your watch. 291 00:14:03,578 --> 00:14:05,513 I-I was just comin' on to ya. 292 00:14:05,518 --> 00:14:08,570 Okay, let's go back to my place. 293 00:14:08,807 --> 00:14:09,702 Oh, boy. 294 00:14:10,447 --> 00:14:13,042 Ready to take my personal tour of Springfield's 295 00:14:13,048 --> 00:14:15,813 most wheelchair-unfriendly restaurants? 296 00:14:15,816 --> 00:14:17,263 I sure am! 297 00:14:17,265 --> 00:14:19,602 I want your knowledge inside me. 298 00:14:25,105 --> 00:14:28,323 Seeing Marge always reminds me of Marge. 299 00:14:31,876 --> 00:14:34,740 Now where will I get my oxygen? 300 00:14:41,805 --> 00:14:45,132 Razorblade of apathy 301 00:14:45,658 --> 00:14:48,823 Shave me with your irony 302 00:14:49,905 --> 00:14:51,810 Shave me! 303 00:14:52,028 --> 00:14:54,060 Shave me! 304 00:14:57,797 --> 00:15:00,681 Have you really read all of these books? 305 00:15:00,685 --> 00:15:03,522 Morally, I couldn't display them on shelves if I hadn't. 306 00:15:03,527 --> 00:15:04,903 But I watch sports as well, 307 00:15:04,906 --> 00:15:06,731 just like a regular man. 308 00:15:07,816 --> 00:15:09,073 Good Goddess! 309 00:15:09,075 --> 00:15:12,390 The Patriots deep in Redskin territory. 310 00:15:12,395 --> 00:15:13,850 This isn't entertainment; 311 00:15:13,856 --> 00:15:15,372 it's genocide! 312 00:15:19,056 --> 00:15:21,383 Why don't we put on some music? 313 00:15:21,515 --> 00:15:22,890 Shave me! 314 00:15:23,535 --> 00:15:24,512 No! No! 315 00:15:24,526 --> 00:15:26,070 I need whale songs! 316 00:15:26,168 --> 00:15:27,083 Oceans of the sea 317 00:15:33,436 --> 00:15:36,041 Marge, may I compliment your appearance? 318 00:15:36,045 --> 00:15:37,072 Yeah, sure. 319 00:15:37,078 --> 00:15:38,693 You look lovely. 320 00:15:38,728 --> 00:15:40,662 If I were to approach you for a kiss, 321 00:15:40,665 --> 00:15:42,920 would you construe that as harassment 322 00:15:42,928 --> 00:15:44,382 or give your willing consent? 323 00:15:44,386 --> 00:15:46,363 Consent, of course. 324 00:15:46,366 --> 00:15:48,772 Ah. Continuing in that line of thought, 325 00:15:48,886 --> 00:15:51,721 may I kiss your mouth with my mouth? 326 00:15:51,727 --> 00:15:53,553 Just do it already! 327 00:15:55,378 --> 00:15:59,200 I had finally realized every rock star's dream: 328 00:15:59,208 --> 00:16:01,032 hating being famous. 329 00:16:06,688 --> 00:16:08,452 Why aren't I happy? 330 00:16:08,455 --> 00:16:11,500 I'm the hottest grunge artist on Mucous Records. 331 00:16:11,508 --> 00:16:13,842 Weird Al is doing a parody of my song. 332 00:16:13,847 --> 00:16:17,492 Raisin bread with applesauce 333 00:16:18,067 --> 00:16:21,491 Tony Danza, he's the boss 334 00:16:22,295 --> 00:16:24,252 Brain freeze! 335 00:16:24,447 --> 00:16:26,493 Brain freeze! 336 00:16:26,635 --> 00:16:28,703 Brain freeze! 337 00:16:28,808 --> 00:16:30,753 Brain freeze! 338 00:16:31,897 --> 00:16:35,601 He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life. 339 00:16:38,135 --> 00:16:39,323 Look at that lighthouse. 340 00:16:39,325 --> 00:16:43,392 That's the ultimate expression of phallocentric technocracy, 341 00:16:43,395 --> 00:16:45,160 violating Mother Sky. 342 00:16:45,175 --> 00:16:47,590 I thought they were just tall so boats could see them. 343 00:16:47,595 --> 00:16:48,331 No, Marge. 344 00:16:48,337 --> 00:16:50,662 Everything penis-shaped is bad. 345 00:16:52,616 --> 00:16:54,271 Look, a wedding! 346 00:16:54,887 --> 00:16:57,592 Slavery is alive and well in Springfield. 347 00:16:57,597 --> 00:16:59,533 You oppose marriage? 348 00:16:59,536 --> 00:17:02,742 Marge, marriage has oppressed women for centuries. 349 00:17:02,745 --> 00:17:03,922 But, Steffan, 350 00:17:03,925 --> 00:17:06,280 I would like to get married someday. 351 00:17:06,296 --> 00:17:10,733 Oh, Marge, it's statements like that make people say women are stupid. 352 00:17:10,737 --> 00:17:12,430 It's statements like that that... 353 00:17:12,508 --> 00:17:13,423 are mean! 354 00:17:13,488 --> 00:17:14,910 Well, it may sound mean, 355 00:17:14,917 --> 00:17:17,012 but I'm just trying to help you evolve. 356 00:17:17,028 --> 00:17:19,743 Oh, evolve yourself, Professor Jerk! 357 00:17:19,747 --> 00:17:22,530 Or should I say, Associate Professor Jerk! 358 00:17:26,435 --> 00:17:30,191 I only got denied tenure because my department head is an idiot! 359 00:17:30,255 --> 00:17:33,671 Der, duh, what did you say about me? 360 00:17:33,688 --> 00:17:35,312 I'm sorry, Professor Moose. 361 00:17:35,325 --> 00:17:38,090 You're about to get your PhD... 362 00:17:38,127 --> 00:17:40,131 Pound Head Down. 363 00:17:50,548 --> 00:17:54,463 Spread yellow gunk on my pancake heart 364 00:17:54,555 --> 00:17:57,960 Country-churned girl in my grocery cart... 365 00:17:57,968 --> 00:18:00,433 Could he be singing about me ? 366 00:18:02,908 --> 00:18:03,840 He is! 367 00:18:04,187 --> 00:18:06,081 I paid for her dreams 368 00:18:06,118 --> 00:18:08,013 She taught me to cry 369 00:18:08,056 --> 00:18:09,520 Like watery knives 370 00:18:09,845 --> 00:18:11,791 Like rain from my eyes 371 00:18:13,395 --> 00:18:17,322 I can't believe you're not mine 372 00:18:20,865 --> 00:18:24,610 I can't believe you're not mine 373 00:18:24,986 --> 00:18:26,752 Mar-ge-rine 374 00:18:28,545 --> 00:18:30,602 Mar-ge-rine 375 00:18:32,327 --> 00:18:34,550 Mar-ge-rine 376 00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:37,982 Mar-ge-rine! 377 00:18:39,705 --> 00:18:41,891 Mar-ge-rine! 378 00:18:41,917 --> 00:18:45,680 He loves me so much after what I did to him. 379 00:18:48,115 --> 00:18:51,073 We interrupt this "Bleak Block" to bring you a breaking story. 380 00:18:51,078 --> 00:18:54,280 Grunge trailblazer Sadgasm have broken up. 381 00:18:56,586 --> 00:18:58,360 Reclusive front man Homer Simpson has 382 00:18:58,365 --> 00:19:00,612 holed himself up in his mansion, as rumors swirled 383 00:19:00,616 --> 00:19:03,201 about an out-of-control narcotics addiction. 384 00:19:03,208 --> 00:19:04,972 This is Kurt Loder reporting from... 385 00:19:05,007 --> 00:19:05,772 the '90s. 386 00:19:06,497 --> 00:19:08,790 No, narcotics! 387 00:19:14,997 --> 00:19:16,682 Oh, my God, you're a junkie! 388 00:19:16,716 --> 00:19:18,053 I need it... 389 00:19:18,058 --> 00:19:19,691 I'm getting you off this stuff. 390 00:19:19,695 --> 00:19:21,100 But I need it! 391 00:19:21,108 --> 00:19:22,633 No, you don't! 392 00:19:27,208 --> 00:19:29,592 Unfortunately, as I later learned, 393 00:19:29,595 --> 00:19:30,780 that wasn't heroin. 394 00:19:30,785 --> 00:19:31,823 It was insulin. 395 00:19:31,825 --> 00:19:34,292 Homer really did need those injections. 396 00:19:34,298 --> 00:19:37,983 I had become diabetic from drinking too many Frappuccinos. 397 00:19:39,196 --> 00:19:42,053 Homie, I got so caught up in the world of college 398 00:19:42,058 --> 00:19:44,831 that I forgot how important your love was. 399 00:19:44,835 --> 00:19:47,263 Can you find it in your heart to take me back? 400 00:19:47,267 --> 00:19:48,333 Of course. 401 00:19:48,335 --> 00:19:52,113 The thing that stood between us the '90s is almost over. 402 00:19:52,118 --> 00:19:52,851 You're right. 403 00:19:52,926 --> 00:19:55,113 But I'm worried about what's on the horizon: 404 00:19:55,118 --> 00:19:57,450 reality shows, Britney Spears, 405 00:19:57,458 --> 00:20:00,150 the suspicious number of home runs being hit... 406 00:20:00,155 --> 00:20:03,261 At least we know there'll never be a president worse than Bill Clinton. 407 00:20:03,278 --> 00:20:06,740 Imagine, lying in a deposition in a civil lawsuit. 408 00:20:06,745 --> 00:20:09,293 That's the worst sin a president could commit. 409 00:20:09,296 --> 00:20:11,403 There'll never be a worse president. 410 00:20:11,415 --> 00:20:12,141 Never. 411 00:20:12,258 --> 00:20:13,011 Never. 412 00:20:13,358 --> 00:20:15,223 With the '90s drawing to a close, 413 00:20:15,225 --> 00:20:17,312 and the Sydney Olympics to look forward to, 414 00:20:17,315 --> 00:20:19,003 our love rekindled. 415 00:20:19,007 --> 00:20:20,620 And one moonlight night, 416 00:20:20,637 --> 00:20:23,752 I finally had fun at a mini-golf course. 417 00:20:27,696 --> 00:20:29,013 Homer, stop! 418 00:20:29,076 --> 00:20:31,840 You don't have to tell the kids everything! 419 00:20:32,295 --> 00:20:33,772 What did I miss? How did it end? 420 00:20:33,778 --> 00:20:35,190 You two ever get back together? 421 00:20:35,196 --> 00:20:37,792 Yep, that professor couldn't keep me and Marge apart. 422 00:20:37,798 --> 00:20:40,882 I mean, unless he had been a little nicer at the beach. 423 00:20:42,085 --> 00:20:45,293 Well, that professor did teach me one good lesson: 424 00:20:45,295 --> 00:20:47,802 Homie is where my heart is. 425 00:20:49,086 --> 00:20:50,892 And once we were back together, 426 00:20:50,896 --> 00:20:54,081 I was to happy ever to grunge again. 427 00:20:55,665 --> 00:20:56,911 Townies.