1
00:00:02,794 --> 00:00:06,548
The Simpsons.

2
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Ah, trash night.

3
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In France, they call it
La Nuit Des Poubelles.

4
00:01:29,380 --> 00:01:31,633
In Germany, it's "Crappenfest."

5
00:01:31,716 --> 00:01:34,886
I can't believe it only comes
52 times a year.

6
00:01:34,969 --> 00:01:36,471
Quit gabbing and start grabbing.

7
00:01:36,554 --> 00:01:38,681
And remember the best stuff is usually

8
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deep in the garbage juice.

9
00:01:41,351 --> 00:01:43,728
See? A new pacifier for Maggie.

10
00:01:45,188 --> 00:01:48,358
Looky here. Cardy-board tubes.

11
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Now we can have indoor plumbing

12
00:01:50,443 --> 00:01:52,737
just like they's got
at the women's lock-up.

13
00:01:52,821 --> 00:01:54,781
They spoilt you, Brandine.

14
00:01:54,864 --> 00:01:58,493
Sometimes I don't even know
who you are anymore.

15
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Ha! Looks like Milhouse's mom

16
00:02:01,538 --> 00:02:03,289
finally threw out his blanky.

17
00:02:03,373 --> 00:02:04,958
He'll pay a lot to get this back.

18
00:02:05,333 --> 00:02:07,836
Especially when we send it
to him piece by piece.

19
00:02:12,674 --> 00:02:14,134
Shh. Quiet.

20
00:02:14,634 --> 00:02:17,387
It seems I will never sell
these She-Hulk vs.

21
00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:19,055
Leon Spinks Comics.

22
00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:20,932
Worst cross-over ever.

23
00:02:30,984 --> 00:02:32,068
Shoo, nerds, shoo!

24
00:02:36,281 --> 00:02:38,700
Well, this muscle shirt's
a pretty good find.

25
00:02:38,783 --> 00:02:40,201
Dad, that's a sports bra.

26
00:02:40,285 --> 00:02:42,162
All I know is, I'm finally getting

27
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the support I need.

28
00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:45,206
Look, Dad, barber hair.

29
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Ooh, Italian.

30
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Hey, Vinnie, how's about a pizza?

31
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I got-a no job.

32
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Mama Mia.

33
00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:57,927
Look what the
Hawaiian restaurant threw out.

34
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Get out of my dreams and into my car.

35
00:03:04,434 --> 00:03:07,979
I don't remember the air
in the kitchen being so wavy.

36
00:03:08,396 --> 00:03:11,024
Good lord, that's gas.

37
00:03:15,612 --> 00:03:16,613
Behold,

38
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I am king Talkie-Tiki.

39
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Hey, Flanders.

40
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Can your god do that?

41
00:03:23,995 --> 00:03:26,998
Actually, Homer, you
and I worship the same god, so...

42
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Irregardless, I am your God now.

43
00:03:33,087 --> 00:03:34,255
Homer, you just can't reroute

44
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the gas line.

45
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Do you know how dangerous that is?

46
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Do not anger Talkie-Tiki!

47
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I am all-power...

48
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I'll be at Moe's.

49
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So I says to the cop,

50
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"No, you're driving under the influence

51
00:03:49,687 --> 00:03:51,231
of being a jerk."

52
00:03:55,360 --> 00:03:57,528
Hey, Barney, what's with the glum face?

53
00:03:57,612 --> 00:04:00,031
You glum or something? Huh, glummy?

54
00:04:00,406 --> 00:04:02,825
You know, it was my birthday last week

55
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and no one remembered.

56
00:04:04,285 --> 00:04:05,453
What are you, nuts?

57
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I threw you a party at my house.

58
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You lie!

59
00:04:08,581 --> 00:04:10,917
Why would I not remember my own...

60
00:04:12,919 --> 00:04:14,462
- Birthday?
- But we did have

61
00:04:14,545 --> 00:04:15,755
a shindig for you, Barn.

62
00:04:15,838 --> 00:04:17,548
We even videotaped it. Look.

63
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Oh, that's it, baby.

64
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All for Moe.

65
00:04:25,556 --> 00:04:26,891
Oh, yeah, work the slot.

66
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Show me the package.

67
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Whoa...
That's, that's a project

68
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I'm working on. Sorry.

69
00:04:33,564 --> 00:04:34,649
OK, Mom, we're rolling.

70
00:04:34,732 --> 00:04:36,234
I wrote a poem for Barney

71
00:04:36,317 --> 00:04:37,610
on this special occasion.

72
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"Now that you're one year older,

73
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the time flew by so fast..."

74
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Bart!

75
00:04:44,575 --> 00:04:45,575
Give me that.

76
00:04:46,703 --> 00:04:47,912
I'm just saying that,

77
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when we die

78
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there's going to be a planet

79
00:04:50,581 --> 00:04:51,499
for the French,

80
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a planet for the Chinese,

81
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and we'll all be a lot happier.

82
00:04:55,503 --> 00:04:57,338
Mr. Gumbel, you're upsetting me.

83
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No, I'm not.

84
00:04:58,923 --> 00:05:02,552
Gee, is that who I look like
when I'm drunk?

85
00:05:02,885 --> 00:05:03,970
You wish.

86
00:05:04,053 --> 00:05:05,430
That's the stage we call.

87
00:05:05,513 --> 00:05:06,848
Professor Barney...

88
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Talkative, coherent, even insightful.

89
00:05:09,892 --> 00:05:11,185
Here's drunk.

90
00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:16,566
Well, I'm off to market.

91
00:05:17,650 --> 00:05:18,650
Marge, you're making

92
00:05:18,693 --> 00:05:20,028
a complete fool of your...

93
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Oh, it's just Barney.

94
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Precious alcohol

95
00:05:28,036 --> 00:05:29,579
soaking into shag.

96
00:05:35,251 --> 00:05:37,545
Oh, how embarrassing.

97
00:05:38,129 --> 00:05:39,422
How did this happen?

98
00:05:39,505 --> 00:05:41,257
Oh, that. You've had that for a while.

99
00:05:41,632 --> 00:05:43,509
Yeah, I can't really
picture you without it.

100
00:05:44,802 --> 00:05:47,013
Oh, I'm a disgrace.

101
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Disgracefully hilarious.

102
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You passed out before we could
even give you your presents.

103
00:05:52,143 --> 00:05:53,144
I still got mine.

104
00:05:53,227 --> 00:05:54,228
Barney, I got you what

105
00:05:54,312 --> 00:05:55,521
no drunk can do without...

106
00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:57,398
Morning-after stationery.

107
00:05:59,817 --> 00:06:02,070
And I got you helicopter flying lessons.

108
00:06:02,153 --> 00:06:05,323
Can you imagine this boozebag
at the wheel of a whirlybird?

109
00:06:05,406 --> 00:06:07,325
He'd be all "look at me...

110
00:06:07,408 --> 00:06:09,827
I'm a tanked-up loser in a helicopter!"

111
00:06:12,580 --> 00:06:15,249
Ah, anyway, happy b-day, punkin.

112
00:06:17,418 --> 00:06:20,213
So, I'm a tanked-up loser?

113
00:06:20,588 --> 00:06:22,256
Is that how you see me?

114
00:06:22,673 --> 00:06:24,842
Oh, sounds like a certain loser

115
00:06:24,926 --> 00:06:26,260
could use some tanking up.

116
00:06:29,514 --> 00:06:30,556
Hey, hey. Where you going?

117
00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:32,558
I'll show you. I'm going to take

118
00:06:32,642 --> 00:06:34,143
these helicopter lessons.

119
00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:35,353
Wait a minute, Barney.

120
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You got to be sober to fly.

121
00:06:37,313 --> 00:06:38,940
I mean, it's not like driving a car.

122
00:06:39,315 --> 00:06:40,817
And I'm going to quit drinking.

123
00:06:42,944 --> 00:06:43,986
No, I mean it.

124
00:06:46,114 --> 00:06:48,366
You won't see me here again, ever.

125
00:06:52,495 --> 00:06:53,579
Wait, that ain't funny.

126
00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:54,914
He's my best customer.

127
00:06:54,997 --> 00:06:56,666
Well, the handwriting's on the wall.

128
00:06:56,999 --> 00:06:59,252
To stay afloat, this bar's
going to have to go queer.

129
00:06:59,627 --> 00:07:00,627
You mean, it's not?

130
00:07:01,671 --> 00:07:02,672
Wrong again,

131
00:07:02,755 --> 00:07:04,507
Gay Guide to Springfield.

132
00:07:09,971 --> 00:07:12,598
Farewell, my long-necked friends.

133
00:07:20,648 --> 00:07:24,152
All right, world, get ready
to meet the clean and sober.

134
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Barney Gumbel.

135
00:07:27,572 --> 00:07:28,656
Whee!

136
00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:30,032
Give me a beer.

137
00:07:30,116 --> 00:07:31,784
I knew you'd be back.

138
00:07:32,243 --> 00:07:34,328
Santeria, you're the greatest.

139
00:07:35,496 --> 00:07:38,082
Barney, didn't you say you
were going to stop drinking?

140
00:07:38,166 --> 00:07:40,960
I know... but it's so hard!

141
00:07:41,043 --> 00:07:42,712
Please help me, Homer!

142
00:07:42,795 --> 00:07:44,213
You came to the right guy.

143
00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:45,631
I'll straighten you out

144
00:07:45,715 --> 00:07:47,341
right after I finish this beer.

145
00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:56,517
Ah, man, that's sweet.

146
00:07:57,101 --> 00:07:58,144
OK, let's go.

147
00:07:58,895 --> 00:08:03,232
My name is Barney,
and... I'm an alcoholic.

148
00:08:03,316 --> 00:08:06,777
I feel for you, pally, but, uh, you want
A.A... This is triple "A."

149
00:08:06,861 --> 00:08:07,904
Oh. My name is Homer,

150
00:08:07,987 --> 00:08:09,113
and I'm planning a trip

151
00:08:09,197 --> 00:08:10,990
- to St. Louis.
- East St. Louis?

152
00:08:11,073 --> 00:08:12,950
Is there any other St. Louis?

153
00:08:19,165 --> 00:08:20,750
Ah, welcome back, Homer.

154
00:08:21,292 --> 00:08:23,794
I see you've finally hit rock bottom.

155
00:08:23,878 --> 00:08:25,421
Not a chance.

156
00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:27,256
I can sink way lower.

157
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,217
I just came to help my friend Barney.

158
00:08:29,300 --> 00:08:31,093
We all know why we're here, don't we?

159
00:08:31,511 --> 00:08:34,055
To keep ourselves sober and to network.

160
00:08:34,138 --> 00:08:35,264
So let's get started.

161
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:36,641
Well, after I lost

162
00:08:36,724 --> 00:08:38,309
my third job in two days

163
00:08:38,392 --> 00:08:40,520
old Gil was in a pit of despair.

164
00:08:40,603 --> 00:08:43,147
And that's when you realized
you were an alcoholic.

165
00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:44,857
Oh, no, I never touch the stuff,

166
00:08:44,941 --> 00:08:47,318
but you don't have to be drunk
to know the value of Amway.

167
00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:50,696
Now, this is used crankcase oil

168
00:08:50,780 --> 00:08:53,866
which you ladies know is
murder to clean up, you know

169
00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:55,409
and company's coming.

170
00:08:55,493 --> 00:08:56,619
Ah! You're doing this

171
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at the worst possible time.

172
00:08:58,371 --> 00:08:59,914
Ah, your finger is in my eye.

173
00:09:01,749 --> 00:09:04,710
I have a problem with alcohol,
and I need help.

174
00:09:04,794 --> 00:09:07,129
Well, your recovery begins today

175
00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:08,965
and we promise you all the sugar cookies

176
00:09:09,048 --> 00:09:11,008
and secondhand smoke you can handle.

177
00:09:11,092 --> 00:09:13,261
These sugar cookies you speak of...

178
00:09:13,594 --> 00:09:15,471
Are they real or symbolic?

179
00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:17,098
They're on that table over there.

180
00:09:17,431 --> 00:09:19,892
Oh, I don't want to walk that far.

181
00:09:20,268 --> 00:09:24,564
Anything that takes 12 steps
isn't worth doing.

182
00:09:24,647 --> 00:09:26,857
Get it? Huh? 12?

183
00:09:27,942 --> 00:09:28,985
Steps?

184
00:09:30,695 --> 00:09:32,572
Hey, how did I get out here?

185
00:09:35,491 --> 00:09:36,867
Hurt everyone.

186
00:09:36,951 --> 00:09:39,036
Did Gaga just say "hurt everyone"?

187
00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:40,496
Gaga... cute name.

188
00:09:40,871 --> 00:09:42,456
The Springfield phone book

189
00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:43,791
needs a new cover.

190
00:09:43,874 --> 00:09:45,209
- It does?
- It does?

191
00:09:45,293 --> 00:09:46,377
Send us your snapshots,

192
00:09:46,460 --> 00:09:47,587
and, if we select yours,

193
00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:48,838
you win a fabulous

194
00:09:48,921 --> 00:09:50,047
mystery prize.

195
00:09:50,131 --> 00:09:51,048
To enter, send your film

196
00:09:51,132 --> 00:09:52,133
to this address.

197
00:09:52,216 --> 00:09:53,676
Too quick? Try again.

198
00:09:54,093 --> 00:09:55,761
Did you get it? Here it is.

199
00:09:55,845 --> 00:09:56,929
Coming in from the left.

200
00:09:57,346 --> 00:09:58,764
Don't delay. Do it today!

201
00:09:59,098 --> 00:10:00,117
You think we should enter?

202
00:10:00,141 --> 00:10:01,350
Well, it shouldn't be too hard

203
00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:02,602
to beat the old photo.

204
00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:08,733
Hmm, it's gotta be here somewhere.

205
00:10:11,402 --> 00:10:12,570
Hey, here's a camera.

206
00:10:14,780 --> 00:10:16,866
And it's still got a roll of film in it.

207
00:10:16,949 --> 00:10:19,368
Man, these old cameras
are really built solid.

208
00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:22,288
Bart, we need that to win the contest.

209
00:10:22,371 --> 00:10:23,497
Win the what now?

210
00:10:30,129 --> 00:10:31,130
Here it goes.

211
00:10:32,048 --> 00:10:34,258
So he's so busy worrying
about the front rotor

212
00:10:34,342 --> 00:10:35,843
he walks right into the back one.

213
00:10:37,970 --> 00:10:39,180
Only in this business.

214
00:10:39,639 --> 00:10:42,558
I'd like to sign up
for helicopter lessons.

215
00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:45,561
Sorry, pal, but it takes
a special kind of man

216
00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:46,896
to pilot these birds.

217
00:10:46,979 --> 00:10:47,980
I got a coupon.

218
00:10:48,064 --> 00:10:49,106
OK, get in.

219
00:10:52,068 --> 00:10:54,570
Elvis played a chopper pilot one time.

220
00:10:55,613 --> 00:10:57,865
He made so many darn mistakes.

221
00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:00,201
We were just laughing at him.

222
00:11:00,284 --> 00:11:01,577
Great singer, though.

223
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:02,703
Oh, absolutely. You know

224
00:11:02,787 --> 00:11:03,788
who else I like

225
00:11:03,871 --> 00:11:05,831
is that, uh, Leo Sayer.

226
00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:08,459
Anyway, we're nice and level now.

227
00:11:08,542 --> 00:11:10,503
How'd you like to take the controls?

228
00:11:10,586 --> 00:11:12,046
You think I'm ready?

229
00:11:12,129 --> 00:11:13,798
Sure, I do. One sec.

230
00:11:13,881 --> 00:11:16,050
Testing black box... one, two.

231
00:11:19,595 --> 00:11:21,013
She's all yours, friend.

232
00:11:23,599 --> 00:11:25,101
Whoa! Whoa!

233
00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:27,436
Oh! Hey!

234
00:11:27,978 --> 00:11:29,397
I think I'm getting it.

235
00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:30,773
Yes, that's great.

236
00:11:31,148 --> 00:11:32,858
Now let's just pull ourselves

237
00:11:32,942 --> 00:11:34,568
out of this tailspin here.

238
00:11:37,071 --> 00:11:39,198
Ooh! Oh, I'm sorry about that.

239
00:11:39,281 --> 00:11:41,826
It's OK. That's what the diapers are for.

240
00:11:44,912 --> 00:11:47,415
Now, when the mamma bird
returns to feed her babies,

241
00:11:47,498 --> 00:11:49,125
we'll have a prize-winning picture.

242
00:11:49,458 --> 00:11:52,128
Lisa, people these days don't
want to see a baby bird.

243
00:11:52,211 --> 00:11:53,963
They want to see celebrities
at their worst.

244
00:11:57,758 --> 00:11:59,468
Is that Rainier Wolfcastle?

245
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:00,720
Check out the gut.

246
00:12:00,803 --> 00:12:01,971
It's for a movie.

247
00:12:02,054 --> 00:12:03,806
I'm playing a fat secret agent.

248
00:12:08,644 --> 00:12:09,562
Hey, Homer.

249
00:12:09,645 --> 00:12:11,021
Oh, no, no, no. Don't sit there.

250
00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:12,898
Take this seat, right next to the tap.

251
00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:15,067
But that's Barney's seat.

252
00:12:15,484 --> 00:12:17,570
Are you trying to make me the new Barney?

253
00:12:17,653 --> 00:12:20,406
Hey, every bar needs a world-class drunk.

254
00:12:20,489 --> 00:12:23,409
Yeah, someone who makes
our alcoholism seem less raging.

255
00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:25,244
Well, forget it, guys.

256
00:12:25,327 --> 00:12:26,662
I am not Barney.

257
00:12:30,458 --> 00:12:32,418
See, Homer? It's not so bad.

258
00:12:32,501 --> 00:12:33,544
Now dance, Rummy!

259
00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:35,087
O-OK.

260
00:12:43,137 --> 00:12:45,806
You danced for hours just because
they told you to?

261
00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:47,850
If I didn't, I'd lose their respect.

262
00:12:50,269 --> 00:12:51,270
Check it out, Homer!

263
00:12:51,353 --> 00:12:52,980
I'm flying this thing!

264
00:12:53,063 --> 00:12:55,024
Get it away from the house!

265
00:12:55,107 --> 00:12:56,358
Want to go for a ride?

266
00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:57,443
Can I, Marge? Can I?

267
00:12:57,526 --> 00:12:59,487
Yes, go! Just go!

268
00:13:01,989 --> 00:13:04,241
So you missed some big changes at Moe's.

269
00:13:04,325 --> 00:13:06,994
He hangs newspapers over the urinals now.

270
00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:09,622
You can read the sports page
while you pee!

271
00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:11,791
Very la-di-da.

272
00:13:11,874 --> 00:13:13,876
I've made some big changes, too.

273
00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:16,086
Can you believe I'm flying
this helicopter?

274
00:13:16,170 --> 00:13:17,421
Powerlines! Powerlines!

275
00:13:17,505 --> 00:13:18,506
Whoops, sorry.

276
00:13:20,758 --> 00:13:23,844
When I think about all the time
I've wasted at Moe's...

277
00:13:23,928 --> 00:13:24,929
Wasted?

278
00:13:25,012 --> 00:13:26,514
What about our staring contests

279
00:13:26,889 --> 00:13:28,933
and the way we always knew
what football coaches

280
00:13:29,016 --> 00:13:30,976
should've done Remember the day we jumped

281
00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:33,145
that census guy and stole his clicker?

282
00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:35,731
Those are all priceless memories, Homer,

283
00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:38,400
but I don't want to do that stuff anymore.

284
00:13:38,776 --> 00:13:41,028
Oh, so you're better than me, is that it?

285
00:13:41,111 --> 00:13:42,863
I didn't say that.

286
00:13:42,947 --> 00:13:44,031
Take me home.

287
00:13:44,114 --> 00:13:45,282
Oh, don't be that way, Homer.

288
00:13:45,366 --> 00:13:47,284
- I'll scream.
- OK, OK.

289
00:13:52,581 --> 00:13:54,250
So how was your ride with Barney?

290
00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:55,751
I don't want to talk about it.

291
00:14:09,723 --> 00:14:10,891
Stupid Barney.

292
00:14:10,975 --> 00:14:12,309
Thinks he's too good for me.

293
00:14:12,393 --> 00:14:13,727
Cheer up, Homie.

294
00:14:13,811 --> 00:14:16,063
You don't need friends to be happy.

295
00:14:16,146 --> 00:14:18,274
I haven't had a friend in years.

296
00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:19,483
But you've got me.

297
00:14:19,567 --> 00:14:20,567
What have I got?

298
00:14:20,609 --> 00:14:23,988
Oh. Well, you still have Lenny and Carl.

299
00:14:24,071 --> 00:14:26,365
Aw, Lenny and Carl suck.

300
00:14:26,782 --> 00:14:28,502
Please don't tell Lenny
and Carl I said that

301
00:14:28,534 --> 00:14:30,134
'cause if I ever lost them as friends...

302
00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:31,680
Look, if Barney's that important to you

303
00:14:31,704 --> 00:14:33,622
you've got to work it out.

304
00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:35,332
Old friends stick together.

305
00:14:35,416 --> 00:14:37,084
Like O.J. and A.C.

306
00:14:37,167 --> 00:14:38,961
Or The Falcon and the Snowman.

307
00:14:39,044 --> 00:14:41,005
Oh, why can't I have a nickname?

308
00:14:46,510 --> 00:14:47,761
OK, that's it.

309
00:14:49,346 --> 00:14:50,389
Looks good.

310
00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:53,517
Aw, Bart, the bulldog didn't ante.

311
00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:56,228
OK, on three.

312
00:14:56,312 --> 00:14:57,438
One, two...

313
00:14:58,063 --> 00:15:00,649
Perfect! Phone book cover, here I come!

314
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:03,527
Hey! No fair!

315
00:15:03,611 --> 00:15:05,946
Oh, we'll never get a good picture.

316
00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:08,032
Hey, why don't we dump
spaghetti on Maggie's head?

317
00:15:08,115 --> 00:15:09,742
That picture's a cliche.

318
00:15:09,825 --> 00:15:10,826
Picture?

319
00:15:15,289 --> 00:15:17,249
Hey, Apu, you got any
of those potato chips

320
00:15:17,333 --> 00:15:18,375
that give you diarrhea?

321
00:15:18,834 --> 00:15:20,794
I need to do a little spring cleaning.

322
00:15:21,128 --> 00:15:23,339
They're in the safety cabinet.
I'll get the key.

323
00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:27,801
Oh, hello, Homer.

324
00:15:28,177 --> 00:15:29,386
Barney.

325
00:15:29,470 --> 00:15:30,387
Beer, huh?

326
00:15:30,471 --> 00:15:31,388
That's right.

327
00:15:31,472 --> 00:15:32,598
Enjoy.

328
00:15:32,681 --> 00:15:34,141
- That, I will.
- Then we agree.

329
00:15:34,224 --> 00:15:35,224
You keep thinking that.

330
00:15:35,267 --> 00:15:36,644
- I will.
- Me, too.

331
00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:38,437
- Good day then.
- Good day, then is right.

332
00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:39,772
- Ta.
- Ta-ta.

333
00:15:41,357 --> 00:15:42,900
Hey, you did not pay for that beer!

334
00:15:48,322 --> 00:15:50,199
Boy, you can see everything

335
00:15:50,282 --> 00:15:51,575
from Mount Springfield...

336
00:15:51,659 --> 00:15:53,702
The squidport, the old monorail...

337
00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:54,787
The play-doh factory.

338
00:15:58,874 --> 00:16:00,501
Crescent moon! Crescent moon!

339
00:16:03,212 --> 00:16:04,588
Come on, Springfield.

340
00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:05,673
Sparkle for me, baby.

341
00:16:06,048 --> 00:16:07,132
That's it.

342
00:16:07,883 --> 00:16:08,883
Heads up!

343
00:16:10,010 --> 00:16:11,804
Bart, that's hot.

344
00:16:11,887 --> 00:16:12,972
I said, "Heads up."

345
00:16:20,771 --> 00:16:23,273
Lenny, Carl, I know a lot
of people badmouth you

346
00:16:23,357 --> 00:16:26,068
and focus on how you suck, but not me.

347
00:16:26,443 --> 00:16:28,570
To me, you're true blue.

348
00:16:28,654 --> 00:16:30,280
Aw, thanks, big guy.

349
00:16:30,364 --> 00:16:31,532
Now dance, Rummy!

350
00:16:31,615 --> 00:16:32,615
OK.

351
00:16:35,577 --> 00:16:36,495
Hiya, Moe.

352
00:16:36,578 --> 00:16:38,080
Well, if it isn't little.

353
00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:40,874
Miss I'm-not-wasting-my-life-anymore...

354
00:16:40,958 --> 00:16:42,126
Which he is.

355
00:16:42,626 --> 00:16:44,670
Moe, I've come here to make amends

356
00:16:44,753 --> 00:16:47,673
for my disgraceful behavior
over the last 20 years.

357
00:16:47,756 --> 00:16:49,174
No, that's OK, Barn.

358
00:16:49,258 --> 00:16:50,300
No, it's not OK.

359
00:16:50,384 --> 00:16:51,885
I broke barstools,

360
00:16:51,969 --> 00:16:53,429
befouled your broom closet

361
00:16:53,512 --> 00:16:55,848
and made sweet love to your pool table

362
00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:57,349
which I then befouled.

363
00:16:57,683 --> 00:17:00,436
Well, that would explain
the drop-off in play.

364
00:17:00,519 --> 00:17:02,521
This is a Channel Six news bulletin.

365
00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,232
Fire has broken out on Mount Springfield

366
00:17:05,315 --> 00:17:07,860
trapping two youngsters and their camera.

367
00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:09,862
Oh, no! That's Bart and Lisa!

368
00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:13,115
Unfortunately, fire trucks are
unavailable to fight the blaze

369
00:17:13,198 --> 00:17:15,638
as they're all being used to film the new
Burt Reynolds movie.

370
00:17:15,701 --> 00:17:17,244
Fireball and Mudflap.

371
00:17:17,786 --> 00:17:19,121
I caught up with Burt on the set.

372
00:17:19,496 --> 00:17:20,998
So, Burt, tell us a little

373
00:17:21,081 --> 00:17:22,791
about Fireball and Mudflap.

374
00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:24,960
Well, I play Jerry "Fireball" mudflap,

375
00:17:25,044 --> 00:17:26,712
a feisty supreme court justice

376
00:17:26,795 --> 00:17:28,464
who's searching for his birth-mother

377
00:17:28,547 --> 00:17:30,924
while competing in a cross-country
fire truck race.

378
00:17:31,008 --> 00:17:32,426
It's garbage.

379
00:17:35,304 --> 00:17:37,890
Barney, you got to fly us
up there and save my kids!

380
00:17:37,973 --> 00:17:38,974
I can't.

381
00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:40,642
I've never flown solo.

382
00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:44,146
Barney, the call is from heroism.

383
00:17:44,229 --> 00:17:46,440
Will you accept the charges?

384
00:17:53,947 --> 00:17:55,741
Where you going? The fire's that way!

385
00:17:56,116 --> 00:17:57,242
I know, I know!

386
00:17:57,576 --> 00:17:59,286
I haven't learned right turns yet.

387
00:17:59,369 --> 00:18:00,746
Aah! Look out!

388
00:18:09,797 --> 00:18:10,964
I can't do this.

389
00:18:11,048 --> 00:18:12,382
My nerves are shot.

390
00:18:19,681 --> 00:18:21,391
Beer! That's what I need!

391
00:18:21,767 --> 00:18:23,393
Barney, no, don't!

392
00:18:23,477 --> 00:18:24,603
Yes, I need it!

393
00:18:26,772 --> 00:18:28,398
No! You've got to be sober for this.

394
00:18:28,482 --> 00:18:29,525
Give me that!

395
00:18:30,526 --> 00:18:31,527
Ew, it's warm.

396
00:18:33,445 --> 00:18:34,738
You can't drink them all!

397
00:18:34,822 --> 00:18:35,864
Oh, yes, I can.

398
00:18:37,282 --> 00:18:38,283
Give me that!

399
00:18:44,623 --> 00:18:47,459
I won't let you give up now
when you've worked so hard

400
00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:49,920
to be the greatest pal

401
00:18:50,003 --> 00:18:51,171
in the world.

402
00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:53,382
I love you.

403
00:18:53,465 --> 00:18:56,009
Let's not lose touch after graduation.

404
00:19:00,514 --> 00:19:01,557
You brave man.

405
00:19:02,057 --> 00:19:04,143
You took six silver bullets for me.

406
00:19:04,518 --> 00:19:06,645
Stay away from my wife!

407
00:19:09,189 --> 00:19:10,983
Looks like it's up to me.

408
00:19:22,953 --> 00:19:23,993
We should be safe up here.

409
00:19:24,037 --> 00:19:25,998
I'm pretty sure fires can't climb trees.

410
00:19:27,207 --> 00:19:28,125
Dad!

411
00:19:28,208 --> 00:19:29,209
Hi, kids!

412
00:19:29,293 --> 00:19:30,627
Hang on!

413
00:19:30,711 --> 00:19:31,879
I'll throw you a ladder!

414
00:19:38,427 --> 00:19:40,220
Get off! Get off!

415
00:19:48,478 --> 00:19:50,105
Dad, help!

416
00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:51,899
All right, I'm coming!

417
00:19:51,982 --> 00:19:52,982
Whoa!

418
00:19:54,359 --> 00:19:56,820
Let me know if you're going
to do that again, Homer.

419
00:20:11,585 --> 00:20:12,794
You did it, Dad.

420
00:20:12,878 --> 00:20:15,422
You can't prove I did it.

421
00:20:15,505 --> 00:20:18,175
No, you saved our lives.

422
00:20:18,258 --> 00:20:21,303
I could do a lot of things
if I had some money.

423
00:20:21,386 --> 00:20:22,429
What?

424
00:20:22,512 --> 00:20:24,181
Now there's a picture.

425
00:20:30,812 --> 00:20:31,897
Kids!

426
00:20:31,980 --> 00:20:33,565
The new phone books are here

427
00:20:33,649 --> 00:20:35,901
and your picture's on the cover!

428
00:20:36,276 --> 00:20:37,694
- All right!
- Wow, cool!

429
00:20:37,778 --> 00:20:38,779
Let me see!

430
00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:42,824
Isn't it adorable?

431
00:20:42,908 --> 00:20:45,535
I guess some baby pictures
were on that old roll of film.

432
00:20:45,619 --> 00:20:48,664
Aw, we'll be the laughingstock
of the whole town.

433
00:20:48,747 --> 00:20:50,916
Well, at least we won the bike.

434
00:20:50,999 --> 00:20:53,293
Actually, I took the picture.

435
00:20:53,377 --> 00:20:55,879
So I gave my prize to the orphanage.

436
00:20:55,963 --> 00:20:57,297
- What?
- How could you?

437
00:20:57,381 --> 00:20:58,423
Just kidding.

438
00:20:58,507 --> 00:20:59,925
I would never do that.

439
00:21:06,223 --> 00:21:08,475
Well, I'm glad we're friends again.

440
00:21:08,558 --> 00:21:09,601
Yeah.

441
00:21:09,977 --> 00:21:11,561
So what do you call this stuff?

442
00:21:11,645 --> 00:21:13,939
A double tall mocha latte.

443
00:21:15,732 --> 00:21:16,733
It's not bad.

444
00:21:16,817 --> 00:21:18,360
Well, it ain't beer.

445
00:21:19,361 --> 00:21:22,322
But at least I got
that monkey off my back.

446
00:21:30,956 --> 00:21:32,708
Nobody gets away from Moe.

447
00:21:33,417 --> 00:21:34,626
Nobody.

448
00:22:29,389 --> 00:22:31,391
Captioned by
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