1 00:00:16,833 --> 00:00:17,683 Riot Rivers! 2 00:00:17,852 --> 00:00:18,559 Aah! 3 00:00:20,003 --> 00:00:21,520 (humming softly) 4 00:00:21,671 --> 00:00:23,856 -Riot Rivers! -(gasps) 5 00:00:24,083 --> 00:00:25,599 HOMER (staticky): Honey, are you in there? 6 00:00:25,726 --> 00:00:26,917 Yes. 7 00:00:26,935 --> 00:00:29,102 -Riot Rivers! -Aah! 8 00:00:29,255 --> 00:00:32,089 (chanting): Ri-ot Riv-ers! Ri-ot Riv-ers! 9 00:00:32,107 --> 00:00:33,699 There it is! Turn! 10 00:00:33,926 --> 00:00:35,275 -(tires squealing) -Calm down! 11 00:00:35,369 --> 00:00:36,976 I'm not gonna miss your stupid water park. 12 00:00:37,129 --> 00:00:38,595 It's not stupid. 13 00:00:38,614 --> 00:00:41,598 Riot Rivers was the greatest summer job I ever had. 14 00:00:41,691 --> 00:00:44,692 Getting paid to watch people of all ages eat it, 15 00:00:44,770 --> 00:00:46,270 again and again. 16 00:00:46,288 --> 00:00:48,863 Just eatin' it so hard! 17 00:00:48,957 --> 00:00:50,382 -♪ I wanna rock ♪ -♪ Rock! ♪ 18 00:00:50,492 --> 00:00:51,717 (laughter) 19 00:00:51,868 --> 00:00:54,461 ♪ I wanna rock ♪ 20 00:00:54,538 --> 00:00:56,947 ♪ Rock! ♪ 21 00:00:56,965 --> 00:00:59,707 -♪ I want to rock ♪ -♪ Rock! ♪ 22 00:00:59,876 --> 00:01:01,226 Wait a minute. 23 00:01:01,453 --> 00:01:03,896 They did a documentary about this place. 24 00:01:04,047 --> 00:01:06,231 (dramatic music plays) 25 00:01:09,128 --> 00:01:11,144 No, it didn't happen that way. 26 00:01:11,297 --> 00:01:13,238 There was different music. 27 00:01:14,075 --> 00:01:16,967 (giggling) 28 00:01:16,985 --> 00:01:18,577 Hmm? 29 00:01:18,728 --> 00:01:20,137 Quiet Rivers?! 30 00:01:20,155 --> 00:01:22,639 They changed the "ruh" to a "qwah." 31 00:01:22,732 --> 00:01:24,232 Did you know about this? 32 00:01:24,251 --> 00:01:26,734 I told you they changed the name before we left. 33 00:01:26,754 --> 00:01:28,754 I thought you were joking. 34 00:01:28,905 --> 00:01:30,738 That's the problem with you, Marge. 35 00:01:30,833 --> 00:01:32,574 You're always kidding around. 36 00:01:32,668 --> 00:01:34,167 (laughter and chatter) 37 00:01:34,261 --> 00:01:36,744 HOMER (groaning): Oh... 38 00:01:36,913 --> 00:01:38,839 Oh! 39 00:01:38,933 --> 00:01:40,432 Come on! 40 00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:44,010 See? They turned all the super cool rides into baby rides. 41 00:01:44,163 --> 00:01:45,512 And the teens working here-- 42 00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:47,422 they're not even laughing at the kids wiping out. 43 00:01:47,591 --> 00:01:49,257 They're loading them in feet first. 44 00:01:49,351 --> 00:01:51,668 Hey! Where are your cutoffs? 45 00:01:51,687 --> 00:01:53,278 Are you even high? 46 00:01:54,857 --> 00:01:56,340 There's nothing worse in this universe 47 00:01:56,433 --> 00:01:58,692 than a ride steering wheel that does nothing. 48 00:01:58,786 --> 00:02:00,101 No, it does something. 49 00:02:00,195 --> 00:02:02,579 It makes the frog smile. 50 00:02:03,958 --> 00:02:05,940 -(Maggie babbles) -(Milhouse humming) 51 00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:08,535 Oh, man, swim diapers. 52 00:02:08,687 --> 00:02:10,445 I remember those. 53 00:02:10,464 --> 00:02:12,113 True freedom. 54 00:02:12,133 --> 00:02:15,092 I could tell you some stories. 55 00:02:20,808 --> 00:02:22,048 BOTH: Can we leave yet? 56 00:02:22,201 --> 00:02:23,809 Can we leave yet? Can we leave yet? 57 00:02:24,036 --> 00:02:25,126 Aw, you kids don't know, 58 00:02:25,146 --> 00:02:27,312 but this place used to be so bitchin'. 59 00:02:27,464 --> 00:02:29,964 And the best slide of all was right over there. 60 00:02:30,042 --> 00:02:31,333 Think of it. 61 00:02:31,393 --> 00:02:33,894 90% of all hospitalizations 62 00:02:34,046 --> 00:02:36,046 off just one ride! 63 00:02:36,139 --> 00:02:38,574 I wonder... 64 00:02:41,829 --> 00:02:44,738 (gasps) It's still here. 65 00:02:44,890 --> 00:02:47,815 The Devil's Deluge had the longest lines, 66 00:02:47,910 --> 00:02:51,461 the scariest turns, even its own ambulance! 67 00:02:53,582 --> 00:02:55,565 Hello, my love. 68 00:02:55,584 --> 00:02:57,901 Did you miss me? 69 00:02:57,994 --> 00:03:00,053 ♪ ♪ 70 00:03:01,407 --> 00:03:02,347 Wow. 71 00:03:02,499 --> 00:03:04,074 -Looks dry. -(wind whistling) 72 00:03:04,167 --> 00:03:05,909 And dangerous. 73 00:03:06,002 --> 00:03:08,187 (Homer grunting softly) 74 00:03:10,098 --> 00:03:12,766 Children, behold the deluge. 75 00:03:12,860 --> 00:03:15,085 For today, we punch fear in the face 76 00:03:15,103 --> 00:03:17,512 and steal death's girlfriend, 77 00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:20,616 as we truly live for the first time. 78 00:03:22,018 --> 00:03:23,035 (crashes) 79 00:03:23,262 --> 00:03:25,495 Also, this is now the only way down. 80 00:03:28,100 --> 00:03:30,024 -♪ I wanna rock ♪ -♪ Rock! ♪ 81 00:03:30,118 --> 00:03:32,102 (Bart and Lisa screaming) 82 00:03:32,195 --> 00:03:33,770 -Branch! -♪ I wanna rock ♪ 83 00:03:33,863 --> 00:03:35,196 -♪ Rock! ♪ -Possums! 84 00:03:35,290 --> 00:03:36,289 O-possums! 85 00:03:36,366 --> 00:03:37,549 -♪ I want to rock ♪ -(hissing) 86 00:03:37,776 --> 00:03:38,608 ♪ Rock! ♪ 87 00:03:38,702 --> 00:03:40,944 (Bart shouting) 88 00:03:40,963 --> 00:03:43,463 -♪ I wanna rock ♪ -♪ Rock! ♪ 89 00:03:43,557 --> 00:03:46,207 (all yelling) 90 00:03:46,227 --> 00:03:48,710 -♪ I wanna rock ♪ -♪ Rock! ♪ 91 00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:52,138 (laughter) 92 00:03:52,233 --> 00:03:54,958 Oh, man, I saw my life flash before my eyes. 93 00:03:54,977 --> 00:03:56,902 I've had an awesome life. 94 00:03:57,129 --> 00:03:59,112 (laughter) 95 00:04:00,966 --> 00:04:02,890 Oh, look at those smiles. 96 00:04:02,985 --> 00:04:05,802 I knew you guys could have fun here. 97 00:04:05,895 --> 00:04:07,913 Yeah, nothing gets the heart pumping 98 00:04:08,064 --> 00:04:10,640 like a brush with... nothing. 99 00:04:10,692 --> 00:04:12,084 (stomachs gurgling) 100 00:04:12,311 --> 00:04:14,419 Um, I don't feel so good. 101 00:04:14,646 --> 00:04:18,482 Aw. The quiet rivers in my tummy are becoming... 102 00:04:18,575 --> 00:04:20,759 raging waters. 103 00:04:20,910 --> 00:04:22,502 Upstairs or downstairs? 104 00:04:22,596 --> 00:04:23,553 -Both! -Both! 105 00:04:24,914 --> 00:04:27,491 Uh, out of the water! Out of the water! 106 00:04:27,584 --> 00:04:31,085 (sirens blaring) 107 00:04:31,105 --> 00:04:33,397 Not me this time. 108 00:04:35,759 --> 00:04:37,167 According to these tests, 109 00:04:37,336 --> 00:04:40,020 your kids' insides and outsides have been exposed 110 00:04:40,172 --> 00:04:43,006 to a toxic mix of 30-year-old hairspray, 111 00:04:43,099 --> 00:04:45,266 hot dog water, opossum dander, 112 00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:48,678 and a grab bag of intestinal and skin-based parasites. 113 00:04:48,697 --> 00:04:50,180 (chuckles) 114 00:04:50,273 --> 00:04:53,350 Oh, my poor queasy babies. 115 00:04:53,368 --> 00:04:56,295 Hmm. I wonder why Homer didn't get sick. 116 00:04:56,446 --> 00:04:58,204 He even went to work today. 117 00:04:58,299 --> 00:05:01,949 -(sirens blaring) -HOMER: Upstairs and downstairs! 118 00:05:01,969 --> 00:05:05,362 Bart and Lisa will be fine after a little TLC. 119 00:05:05,380 --> 00:05:08,532 By TLC, I mean "taking Lorexo-Cortisone." 120 00:05:08,625 --> 00:05:11,310 And by little, I mean a four-week intensive regimen. 121 00:05:11,495 --> 00:05:14,888 Oh, steroids? Are there any side effects? 122 00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:16,315 Nothing serious. 123 00:05:16,466 --> 00:05:18,525 Maybe a little temporary weight gain. 124 00:05:21,046 --> 00:05:22,395 Hurry up, kids! 125 00:05:22,489 --> 00:05:25,324 You don't want to be late for your first day of school. 126 00:05:26,218 --> 00:05:28,552 Ah, a new school year. 127 00:05:28,554 --> 00:05:30,904 Uncracked books, pink erasers, 128 00:05:30,998 --> 00:05:33,314 a binder where the rings still meet. 129 00:05:33,334 --> 00:05:35,316 And I get to find out what happened 130 00:05:35,336 --> 00:05:38,170 to those praying mantis eggs I left in Skinner's office. 131 00:05:39,731 --> 00:05:42,732 If, uh, we all agree to respect each other's workspace, 132 00:05:42,826 --> 00:05:44,734 this, uh, year will go just fine. 133 00:05:44,828 --> 00:05:46,428 (hissing) 134 00:05:48,423 --> 00:05:51,833 Oh, look at that belly. Mwah. 135 00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:54,911 (singsongy): Someone's getting chunky! 136 00:05:55,004 --> 00:05:56,913 (in slow motion): Chunky. 137 00:05:57,006 --> 00:05:59,524 (distorted growling) 138 00:06:00,677 --> 00:06:02,586 ♪ ♪ 139 00:06:02,604 --> 00:06:04,404 (humming) 140 00:06:07,109 --> 00:06:10,702 (screaming) 141 00:06:10,929 --> 00:06:12,762 Off you go. 142 00:06:12,897 --> 00:06:15,082 Don't want to be late for school. 143 00:06:16,359 --> 00:06:17,542 Oh. 144 00:06:22,365 --> 00:06:24,441 LISA: Okay, forget about what Mom said. 145 00:06:24,610 --> 00:06:26,033 Don't let it ruin the first day of school. 146 00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:27,611 That's the best day of the year! 147 00:06:27,704 --> 00:06:29,370 Welcome, class. 148 00:06:29,464 --> 00:06:32,057 This year, we'll be learning lessons that will stay with you 149 00:06:32,208 --> 00:06:34,393 for the rest of your lives. 150 00:06:34,620 --> 00:06:35,952 (shrieks) 151 00:06:35,954 --> 00:06:37,562 (Lisa sighs) 152 00:06:37,714 --> 00:06:40,123 (breathing deeply) 153 00:06:40,142 --> 00:06:42,067 Calm down. It's okay. 154 00:06:42,327 --> 00:06:43,960 SKINNER: Attention, students. 155 00:06:43,979 --> 00:06:45,553 Due to budget cuts, the following 156 00:06:45,647 --> 00:06:49,056 after-school programs have been cancelled: dance chunk, 157 00:06:49,151 --> 00:06:52,059 intramural chunk-ing, and chunky chunk chunk. 158 00:06:52,079 --> 00:06:53,912 LISA: What is going on with me? 159 00:06:54,063 --> 00:06:56,990 I'm going chunky. Aah! I mean, crazy! 160 00:06:57,142 --> 00:06:59,325 (whimpering quietly) 161 00:06:59,478 --> 00:07:01,903 Get a grip. 162 00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:04,998 -(rhythmic pulsating) -(gasping) 163 00:07:05,150 --> 00:07:06,499 ♪ Chunk-chunky, chunk ♪ 164 00:07:06,652 --> 00:07:08,576 ♪ Chunk, chunk! ♪ 165 00:07:08,595 --> 00:07:10,503 Chunk-chunk! 166 00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:11,988 Chunky! 167 00:07:11,990 --> 00:07:12,989 (whimpers) 168 00:07:12,991 --> 00:07:14,991 Lisa is soft now. 169 00:07:15,010 --> 00:07:16,768 (screaming) 170 00:07:16,995 --> 00:07:19,162 -(sleeves rip) -Hmm? 171 00:07:19,181 --> 00:07:21,164 Dang, Simpson. 172 00:07:21,333 --> 00:07:23,090 Have you been to Costco? 173 00:07:23,185 --> 00:07:25,426 'Cause you're carrying bulk. 174 00:07:25,446 --> 00:07:28,780 Oh, that's because of the steroids I was taking. 175 00:07:28,932 --> 00:07:30,782 -You see, my mom... -Steroids! 176 00:07:30,934 --> 00:07:34,010 -Nice! -Yeah, badass! 177 00:07:34,029 --> 00:07:36,103 Like I was saying, 178 00:07:36,123 --> 00:07:38,105 I've been juicing pretty hard all summer. 179 00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:40,700 Had to stop because I beat up my dad. 180 00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:42,352 ALL: Roid rage! 181 00:07:42,370 --> 00:07:46,206 No more hanging out with those babies for you, Simpson. 182 00:07:46,358 --> 00:07:48,875 Today, you become a man. 183 00:07:48,969 --> 00:07:50,710 What is this place? 184 00:07:50,862 --> 00:07:54,789 It used to be a padded cell for left-handed kids. 185 00:07:54,883 --> 00:07:57,309 Welcome to the Meat Castle. 186 00:07:57,569 --> 00:07:59,436 ♪ ♪ 187 00:08:00,814 --> 00:08:02,722 Say goodbye to your victim bod. 188 00:08:02,816 --> 00:08:06,318 Your shred-ucation begins today. 189 00:08:06,545 --> 00:08:07,969 -(heavy metal music plays) -Yeah. Swole! 190 00:08:08,137 --> 00:08:09,546 -So swole! -(others grunting) 191 00:08:09,564 --> 00:08:14,367 -(vocalizing) -Swole! Swole. Swole. Swole! 192 00:08:15,329 --> 00:08:17,144 (all grunting) 193 00:08:17,164 --> 00:08:19,146 I'm living every kid's dream-- 194 00:08:19,166 --> 00:08:22,292 to be accepted by his tormentors. 195 00:08:25,731 --> 00:08:28,748 MARGE (singsongy): Someone's getting chunky! 196 00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:30,425 (Lisa groans) 197 00:08:33,588 --> 00:08:36,330 Oh, honey, you seem down in the dumps. 198 00:08:36,424 --> 00:08:37,849 And I know why. 199 00:08:38,001 --> 00:08:40,001 You do? (sighs) 200 00:08:40,095 --> 00:08:42,428 Because it's really hard to talk about when... 201 00:08:42,581 --> 00:08:45,673 Of course. I don't know what I was thinking... 202 00:08:45,767 --> 00:08:48,935 by not taking you shopping for back-to-school clothes. 203 00:08:49,029 --> 00:08:50,570 Wait, wha...? 204 00:08:51,923 --> 00:08:55,016 Oh. Nothing upside downs my frowns 205 00:08:55,035 --> 00:08:56,943 like a girls' trip to the mall. 206 00:08:57,095 --> 00:08:58,820 I don't know, Mom. 207 00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:00,613 I'm just not feeling it. 208 00:09:00,766 --> 00:09:01,948 Mm. 209 00:09:02,100 --> 00:09:05,293 (gasps) Can I get it? Can I get it? 210 00:09:06,271 --> 00:09:08,421 (squeals excitedly) 211 00:09:10,792 --> 00:09:13,701 Hmm. I'm not sure that's a fit. 212 00:09:14,704 --> 00:09:17,538 Are you positive that's the eight-year-old size? 213 00:09:17,632 --> 00:09:19,449 Oh, super pos. 214 00:09:19,467 --> 00:09:21,467 Let's upsize her to a ten short. 215 00:09:21,620 --> 00:09:23,210 -(static) -Get me some tens out here, Derek. 216 00:09:23,230 --> 00:09:25,713 The eights are a freaking disaster on this kid! 217 00:09:25,807 --> 00:09:28,308 Forget it, Mom. Let's just go. 218 00:09:28,402 --> 00:09:29,642 Nuh-uh. 219 00:09:29,795 --> 00:09:31,127 We're not leaving this mall 220 00:09:31,146 --> 00:09:34,480 until we find you a really fun ensemble. 221 00:09:34,633 --> 00:09:36,408 (Lisa groans) 222 00:09:36,559 --> 00:09:38,225 That is so the look. 223 00:09:38,245 --> 00:09:40,637 Yes, I think that is the look. 224 00:09:40,655 --> 00:09:42,914 Mom, it's too big! 225 00:09:43,066 --> 00:09:44,490 No, it's not. 226 00:09:44,643 --> 00:09:47,127 It's very flattering. 227 00:09:53,819 --> 00:09:55,501 It's not your job 228 00:09:55,654 --> 00:09:58,930 to constantly comment on my appearance! 229 00:09:59,157 --> 00:10:01,825 But, honey, I could never pull that off. 230 00:10:01,843 --> 00:10:04,327 On you, it's so eye-catching. 231 00:10:04,420 --> 00:10:06,830 Oh, you are slaying those tens. 232 00:10:06,998 --> 00:10:09,608 Do you really think I want to call attention to myself?! 233 00:10:09,759 --> 00:10:11,610 Ugh! Get this thing off of me! 234 00:10:11,761 --> 00:10:13,336 (Lisa muttering) 235 00:10:13,429 --> 00:10:16,197 Okay, why don't you give these a try? 236 00:10:17,025 --> 00:10:18,099 LISA: No! 237 00:10:18,118 --> 00:10:20,176 (Lisa grunting) 238 00:10:20,195 --> 00:10:23,437 Um, let's take a little fro-yo break. 239 00:10:23,531 --> 00:10:26,199 You can't fix everything with fro-yo! 240 00:10:26,351 --> 00:10:30,019 (laughs) That's what you acted like before the medicine. 241 00:10:30,021 --> 00:10:33,131 Young lady, in this family, we put clothing back on the hanger 242 00:10:33,358 --> 00:10:35,616 so the salesperson will think we're classy! 243 00:10:35,636 --> 00:10:37,952 Why are you acting like such a cranky pants? 244 00:10:37,971 --> 00:10:40,121 Stop talking to me about clothes! 245 00:10:40,215 --> 00:10:42,807 How's everything going in here? I brought twelves. 246 00:10:42,959 --> 00:10:44,884 Do we need more twelves in here? 247 00:10:45,036 --> 00:10:49,205 This mall is an assault on human dignity! 248 00:10:49,224 --> 00:10:52,317 I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! 249 00:10:52,468 --> 00:10:55,654 -(shouting gibberish) -(Marge groaning) 250 00:10:57,232 --> 00:10:59,157 If they ask who helped you today, 251 00:10:59,234 --> 00:11:02,160 remember, I'm Shauna. 252 00:11:03,238 --> 00:11:04,888 They don't respect you 253 00:11:04,906 --> 00:11:07,724 unless you insult them just a little bit. 254 00:11:07,742 --> 00:11:09,834 -Girls? -Cops. 255 00:11:09,944 --> 00:11:11,503 -For real. -Yeah. Def. Yeah. 256 00:11:11,654 --> 00:11:15,173 Oh, look who got a visit from the pube fairy. 257 00:11:15,400 --> 00:11:17,233 Dude, those aren't pubes. 258 00:11:17,326 --> 00:11:20,512 Yeah-huh. Everything new is a pube. 259 00:11:20,588 --> 00:11:23,682 So, Simpson, you got your eyes on any ladies? 260 00:11:23,833 --> 00:11:26,926 Uh, yeah, I'm talking to a couple dozen honeys right now. 261 00:11:27,020 --> 00:11:28,502 I'm in love with most of 'em, 262 00:11:28,522 --> 00:11:31,581 but right now, I want to keep my focus on the gym. 263 00:11:31,599 --> 00:11:34,600 -(timer dings) -Pizza rolls are hot! 264 00:11:34,753 --> 00:11:36,269 Uh, what about our reps? 265 00:11:36,421 --> 00:11:38,012 There's plenty of time for that... 266 00:11:38,031 --> 00:11:39,756 after a weight fight! 267 00:11:39,849 --> 00:11:42,158 (grunting, laughing) 268 00:11:43,686 --> 00:11:44,869 (grunting continues) 269 00:11:45,096 --> 00:11:47,664 Working out is awesome! 270 00:11:50,101 --> 00:11:54,045 We don't slam doors in this house! (groans) 271 00:11:54,197 --> 00:11:56,363 (rhythmic grunting) 272 00:11:56,458 --> 00:11:57,882 (Homer whimpers) 273 00:11:58,034 --> 00:12:00,777 So, uh, how was the mall? 274 00:12:00,795 --> 00:12:05,131 Apparently, I'm the worst mother in the world for being nice. 275 00:12:05,283 --> 00:12:08,893 Lisa had a huge tantrum in front of the cell phone jewelry. 276 00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:11,621 I've asked her a hundred times what the problem is, 277 00:12:11,639 --> 00:12:13,064 and she won't tell me. 278 00:12:13,216 --> 00:12:14,807 Can you talk to her? 279 00:12:14,901 --> 00:12:16,401 Of course, honey. 280 00:12:16,478 --> 00:12:19,553 Time for me to earn my "World's Greatest Dad" mug. 281 00:12:19,647 --> 00:12:22,298 You bought that for yourself in the hospital gift shop 282 00:12:22,391 --> 00:12:24,133 while I was giving birth. 283 00:12:24,152 --> 00:12:27,662 We both left with something special that day. 284 00:12:28,731 --> 00:12:29,581 (Homer moans softly) 285 00:12:29,808 --> 00:12:30,807 Honey, 286 00:12:30,900 --> 00:12:31,991 if something's bothering you, 287 00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:32,917 you got to let it out. 288 00:12:33,144 --> 00:12:34,660 Like swallowed burps, 289 00:12:34,813 --> 00:12:37,647 buried feelings can burst out at the worst possible... 290 00:12:37,740 --> 00:12:39,148 (burps) 291 00:12:39,167 --> 00:12:41,092 Mom called me "chunky." 292 00:12:42,670 --> 00:12:44,504 HOMER: Oh, my God. 293 00:12:44,656 --> 00:12:47,991 Marge did the one thing no parent is ever supposed to do-- 294 00:12:48,009 --> 00:12:50,343 acknowledge what their children look like! 295 00:12:50,495 --> 00:12:52,604 Oh, what do I say to make it better? 296 00:12:52,755 --> 00:12:55,273 I know. I'll tell her Marge isn't her real mother, 297 00:12:55,424 --> 00:12:57,442 and Lisa and I should pack up and leave forever. 298 00:12:57,593 --> 00:13:00,336 No, something about that feels wrong. 299 00:13:00,429 --> 00:13:03,281 Hmm, I must use an entire lifetime 300 00:13:03,432 --> 00:13:05,950 of fatherly knowledge to help my daughter. 301 00:13:06,102 --> 00:13:08,011 (clears throat) 302 00:13:08,029 --> 00:13:11,197 Buying versus leasing-- pros and cons. 303 00:13:11,366 --> 00:13:14,108 How many miles do you think you'll be driving a year? 304 00:13:14,202 --> 00:13:15,460 Thanks for trying, Dad. 305 00:13:15,611 --> 00:13:17,796 That is what you were doing, right? 306 00:13:17,947 --> 00:13:19,188 Yes. 307 00:13:19,357 --> 00:13:21,691 I can't expect you to understand my problem. 308 00:13:21,709 --> 00:13:25,695 I just wish I didn't care what people think. 309 00:13:25,713 --> 00:13:28,364 Honey, if you didn't care, you wouldn't be human. 310 00:13:28,457 --> 00:13:32,718 (gasps) Not human, I say. 311 00:13:32,813 --> 00:13:34,554 Here we are. 312 00:13:34,648 --> 00:13:37,223 When you called for help, I was hoping you needed someone 313 00:13:37,350 --> 00:13:39,967 to spell-check your suicide note. 314 00:13:39,986 --> 00:13:42,211 And just so we're clear, you dented cue ball, 315 00:13:42,230 --> 00:13:44,047 we're not doing this for you. 316 00:13:44,065 --> 00:13:46,157 We're here for Lisa. 317 00:13:46,309 --> 00:13:49,160 Hey, look who stopped by! 318 00:13:49,312 --> 00:13:52,813 How would you like to go on a completely spontaneous outing 319 00:13:52,833 --> 00:13:54,574 with your aunts? 320 00:13:54,668 --> 00:13:57,836 -Uh... -In our world, that's a "yes." 321 00:13:58,063 --> 00:14:00,413 We heard what your mother said. Not cool. 322 00:14:00,565 --> 00:14:04,491 We only use "chunky" to describe jewelry and stew. 323 00:14:04,569 --> 00:14:08,012 And since we've had stew for breakfast... 324 00:14:08,239 --> 00:14:09,589 (gasps) 325 00:14:09,757 --> 00:14:12,851 Kid, your Aunt Selma and I have been called every mean name 326 00:14:13,078 --> 00:14:14,410 in the book. 327 00:14:14,429 --> 00:14:17,413 You just got to let it roll off your back. 328 00:14:17,432 --> 00:14:18,764 But how? 329 00:14:18,933 --> 00:14:20,674 ♪ When the world ♪ 330 00:14:20,694 --> 00:14:23,528 ♪ Hurts your feelings ♪ 331 00:14:23,755 --> 00:14:28,349 ♪ And on certain words you tend to dwell ♪ 332 00:14:28,443 --> 00:14:33,204 ♪ Then live life like your aunties ♪ 333 00:14:33,373 --> 00:14:36,690 ♪ And tell the jerks to go to hell ♪ 334 00:14:36,784 --> 00:14:41,212 ♪ This is the dawning of the age of who gives a crap ♪ 335 00:14:41,439 --> 00:14:44,382 ♪ The age of who gives a crap ♪ 336 00:14:44,533 --> 00:14:45,958 (all groaning) 337 00:14:46,127 --> 00:14:50,796 -♪ Who gives a crap ♪ -(neighs) 338 00:14:50,965 --> 00:14:55,560 ♪ Who gives a crap... ♪ 339 00:14:55,711 --> 00:14:58,229 ♪ Muffin tops, jowls and crow's feet ♪ 340 00:14:58,456 --> 00:15:01,124 ♪ Droopy boobs and no thigh gap ♪ 341 00:15:01,142 --> 00:15:02,975 ♪ Chicken skin and body odor ♪ 342 00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:05,386 ♪ Chin hairs that need some trimmin' ♪ 343 00:15:05,554 --> 00:15:07,663 ♪ All these things that's wrong with women ♪ 344 00:15:07,723 --> 00:15:10,891 ♪ It's all good, just go on livin' ♪ 345 00:15:10,985 --> 00:15:15,838 ♪ Who gives a crap... ♪ 346 00:15:15,898 --> 00:15:20,810 ♪ Who gives a crap? ♪ 347 00:15:20,828 --> 00:15:22,921 (people groaning) 348 00:15:23,148 --> 00:15:25,131 (humming "Let the Sunshine In") 349 00:15:27,928 --> 00:15:31,245 Lisa, your dad told me why you've been upset. 350 00:15:31,264 --> 00:15:34,340 I'm so sorry for what I said. 351 00:15:34,492 --> 00:15:37,827 It was a mistake, and I feel terrible. 352 00:15:37,920 --> 00:15:39,662 Thanks, Mom, but spending the afternoon 353 00:15:39,681 --> 00:15:42,515 with Aunt Patty and Selma made me feel a lot better 354 00:15:42,667 --> 00:15:44,091 about myself. 355 00:15:44,169 --> 00:15:46,945 And also, a lot worse about everyone else. 356 00:15:47,096 --> 00:15:50,173 Mm. Why couldn't I just keep my mouth shut? 357 00:15:50,191 --> 00:15:53,117 After all, now that you're off the steroids, 358 00:15:53,269 --> 00:15:55,178 soon you'll be back to normal. 359 00:15:55,196 --> 00:15:57,789 And you'll be my perfect little girl again. 360 00:15:58,016 --> 00:16:00,249 So, we all better now? 361 00:16:08,026 --> 00:16:11,552 (screaming) 362 00:16:16,217 --> 00:16:17,809 Ooh, how about this one? 363 00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:19,477 It has a lot of notes. 364 00:16:19,628 --> 00:16:21,128 I know you like those. 365 00:16:21,147 --> 00:16:23,147 Don't pretend you know what I like. 366 00:16:23,299 --> 00:16:26,484 Oh, can you just tell me why we're back to glowering?! 367 00:16:26,635 --> 00:16:28,319 -Huh? -Marge, 368 00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:31,322 I know all about the rough patch you're having with Lisa. 369 00:16:31,474 --> 00:16:34,659 I went through the exact same thing with Milhouse. (laughs) 370 00:16:34,810 --> 00:16:36,719 We're so similar, you and I. 371 00:16:36,738 --> 00:16:38,070 Are we, though? 372 00:16:38,164 --> 00:16:40,906 Look, I don't just give this name to everybody. 373 00:16:41,059 --> 00:16:43,893 Just my best girlfriends. 374 00:16:43,986 --> 00:16:45,486 MARGE: Hmm. 375 00:16:45,580 --> 00:16:46,987 Hypnotherapy? 376 00:16:47,081 --> 00:16:49,565 Isn't that a little... woo-woo? 377 00:16:49,658 --> 00:16:51,567 Dr. Sage is amazing. 378 00:16:51,586 --> 00:16:54,904 We went in not speaking, and after one session, 379 00:16:54,997 --> 00:16:57,907 -we're back in the tub together! -Mm. 380 00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,184 -(Lisa blowing notes) -(gasps) 381 00:17:01,929 --> 00:17:03,563 (sighs): Oh. 382 00:17:04,766 --> 00:17:06,173 What's up, workout bros? 383 00:17:06,192 --> 00:17:09,769 Who wants toaster strudel? Extra glaze packets! 384 00:17:09,863 --> 00:17:11,821 -Hmm? -(giggling) 385 00:17:13,258 --> 00:17:15,516 (gasps) Guys, look out! There's girls in here. 386 00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:18,110 They're called girlfriends, baby dork. 387 00:17:18,263 --> 00:17:20,780 Well, Jimbo and Flor haven't made it official, 388 00:17:20,932 --> 00:17:22,540 but we're all hopeful. 389 00:17:22,767 --> 00:17:24,116 BOTH: We don't do labels! 390 00:17:24,269 --> 00:17:26,269 But-but I thought we came here to work out 391 00:17:26,287 --> 00:17:29,047 and-and microwave golf balls and talk about girls, 392 00:17:29,198 --> 00:17:30,381 but not real ones! 393 00:17:30,533 --> 00:17:34,034 (crying) I thought we were big boys! 394 00:17:34,054 --> 00:17:36,679 (all moaning, laughing) 395 00:17:39,375 --> 00:17:41,601 ♪ ♪ 396 00:17:44,472 --> 00:17:47,881 BART: So dawn bros down to day. 397 00:17:47,975 --> 00:17:51,194 Nothing swole can stay. 398 00:17:59,079 --> 00:18:02,805 Marge, Lisa, today, we'll be using hypnotherapy 399 00:18:02,807 --> 00:18:04,824 as a tool that builds empathy 400 00:18:04,976 --> 00:18:08,811 by exploring the landscapes of each other's minds. 401 00:18:08,830 --> 00:18:11,163 I'm sorry. I just find it a little hard to believe 402 00:18:11,257 --> 00:18:13,332 that everything's going to be solved just because 403 00:18:13,484 --> 00:18:16,243 you swing a gold pocket watch in front of my face. 404 00:18:16,337 --> 00:18:18,912 (laughs) Oh, hypnotism has come a long way 405 00:18:18,932 --> 00:18:20,431 since pocket watches. 406 00:18:20,658 --> 00:18:24,727 Now, look into Dr. Mysterio's Mesmerific Hypnowheel. 407 00:18:25,754 --> 00:18:28,831 ♪ ♪ 408 00:18:28,924 --> 00:18:31,484 BOTH: Spinny thing. 409 00:18:34,096 --> 00:18:35,780 Where are we? 410 00:18:35,931 --> 00:18:37,764 We're in my mind, 411 00:18:37,842 --> 00:18:41,360 and I thought this woman was a total quack. (laughs) 412 00:18:41,512 --> 00:18:43,604 DR. SAGE: I can hear everything you're saying. 413 00:18:43,698 --> 00:18:45,030 Sorry. 414 00:18:45,183 --> 00:18:46,682 It's so nice here. 415 00:18:46,701 --> 00:18:49,368 I feel like I should take my shoes off. 416 00:18:49,520 --> 00:18:52,779 There's a Zen garden, a waterfall. 417 00:18:52,907 --> 00:18:54,298 (screams) 418 00:18:54,525 --> 00:18:55,782 Chunky! 419 00:18:55,802 --> 00:18:58,302 And it's taking up so much space! 420 00:18:58,454 --> 00:19:01,380 Look what it's done to the Powerpuff Girls. 421 00:19:01,532 --> 00:19:03,307 (whimpering) 422 00:19:03,534 --> 00:19:06,051 What if I never get "Chunky" out of my head? 423 00:19:06,204 --> 00:19:08,704 Oh, sweetie, I'm so sorry. 424 00:19:08,723 --> 00:19:11,816 If I put it there, then I'm going to get it out. 425 00:19:11,967 --> 00:19:15,111 (grunting) 426 00:19:15,897 --> 00:19:17,655 (moans) Oh. 427 00:19:17,732 --> 00:19:21,567 I never realized how much power my words have. 428 00:19:21,719 --> 00:19:24,553 Now that you've explored Lisa's subconscious, 429 00:19:24,555 --> 00:19:27,556 perhaps we should travel to Marge's. 430 00:19:27,650 --> 00:19:29,691 I have one of those? 431 00:19:29,693 --> 00:19:31,652 My old bedroom. 432 00:19:31,671 --> 00:19:33,987 This must be one of my memories. 433 00:19:35,066 --> 00:19:37,875 Mom, what do you think of my new haircut? 434 00:19:38,102 --> 00:19:39,493 It's nice, but I do think 435 00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:43,264 longer hair complements your plain features. 436 00:19:46,001 --> 00:19:48,411 "Plain." Oh, my God. 437 00:19:48,579 --> 00:19:52,081 I don't remember her saying that, but now I know why 438 00:19:52,099 --> 00:19:55,008 it's been in my head every waking minute. 439 00:19:55,102 --> 00:19:56,569 (cries, sniffles) 440 00:19:58,923 --> 00:20:03,426 Oh, Lisa, now I know exactly how I made you feel. 441 00:20:03,444 --> 00:20:06,537 Now I know exactly how you felt. 442 00:20:06,689 --> 00:20:08,664 BOTH: I love you! 443 00:20:13,046 --> 00:20:15,713 I love both of you! 444 00:20:15,864 --> 00:20:17,215 I guess the hurtful things 445 00:20:17,291 --> 00:20:20,459 your mother says to you never totally disappear. 446 00:20:20,628 --> 00:20:23,370 Maybe they don't, but I really believe 447 00:20:23,464 --> 00:20:25,281 that if you're aware of them, 448 00:20:25,299 --> 00:20:28,801 those words will lose their power over you... 449 00:20:28,953 --> 00:20:33,973 very, very, very slowly. 450 00:20:34,067 --> 00:20:35,641 If at all. 451 00:20:35,793 --> 00:20:37,693 But probably not. 452 00:20:49,657 --> 00:20:51,249 I wonder if everyone has words 453 00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:53,542 from their childhood stuck inside their heads. 454 00:21:08,175 --> 00:21:11,435 (snoring) Ah, lazy. 455 00:21:11,587 --> 00:21:15,606 Captioning sponsored by 20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION 456 00:21:15,799 --> 00:21:19,443 FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY 457 00:21:19,595 --> 00:21:23,447 And FORD. We go further, so you can. 458 00:21:23,524 --> 00:21:27,618 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 459 00:21:28,604 --> 00:21:30,162 Shh!