1
00:00:14,948 --> 00:00:17,150
♪ ♪
2
00:00:21,455 --> 00:00:25,359
Oh, I think you better stay home
from school, sweetie.
3
00:00:25,425 --> 00:00:26,793
I'm not at school?
4
00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:29,863
No, honey.
And you should stay home.
5
00:00:29,930 --> 00:00:31,398
Yes, Miss Hoover.
6
00:00:31,465 --> 00:00:33,267
I put some books beside the bed.
7
00:00:33,333 --> 00:00:35,502
Will you test me on them later?
8
00:00:35,569 --> 00:00:38,872
Of course. And I won't even
give you any warning.
9
00:00:38,939 --> 00:00:41,174
I'd like that.
10
00:00:44,044 --> 00:00:44,878
(grunts)
11
00:00:44,945 --> 00:00:46,580
Mm!
12
00:00:46,647 --> 00:00:48,649
(reading):
13
00:00:49,816 --> 00:00:51,818
HOMER (reading):
14
00:00:55,689 --> 00:00:57,558
Aw. Ooh!
15
00:00:57,624 --> 00:01:01,628
"Born near Florence, Italy,
in the year 1452,
16
00:01:01,695 --> 00:01:04,231
"Leonardo da Vinci
displayed a genius
17
00:01:04,298 --> 00:01:06,833
unmatched in human history."
18
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Extra, extra!
19
00:01:08,168 --> 00:01:10,203
Renaissance begins today!
20
00:01:10,270 --> 00:01:13,740
If you're gonna torture someone,
do it quick!
21
00:01:13,807 --> 00:01:17,678
LISA: "As a child,
Lisanardo's gifts were evident"
22
00:01:17,744 --> 00:01:18,745
Hey, sonny boy,
23
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I want you to be
just as talented as her.
24
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I made an Uffizi
25
00:01:23,951 --> 00:01:25,886
on the floor of the Farnese.
26
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Yeah, yeah.
That's, uh, that's great.
27
00:01:28,055 --> 00:01:29,990
Lisanardo, did you finish
28
00:01:30,057 --> 00:01:33,427
that drawing of the suspect yet?
29
00:01:33,493 --> 00:01:35,162
Wow.
30
00:01:35,929 --> 00:01:38,131
Gee. That talented kid
31
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is gonna make you
a lot of money.
32
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- (cash register dings)
- We're rich!
33
00:01:42,035 --> 00:01:44,538
Like Marge's tomato sauce.
34
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- (grunts) Not until dinner.
- Oh!
35
00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:49,643
While we're celebrating
Saint Christopher,
36
00:01:49,710 --> 00:01:52,679
he help people
who get lost telling stories
37
00:01:52,746 --> 00:01:54,581
find their way back
to the point.
38
00:01:54,648 --> 00:01:58,418
He was canonized
by Gregory the Inconvenient,
39
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who shot him out of the cannon.
40
00:02:00,754 --> 00:02:03,757
This was before
they discovered gunpowder,
41
00:02:03,824 --> 00:02:07,794
so they pulled the cannon
to a cliff and pointed down.
42
00:02:07,861 --> 00:02:09,630
But then he stayed in.
43
00:02:09,696 --> 00:02:13,100
They had to give him
an eviction notice.
44
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LISA:
"Florence, at the time,
45
00:02:14,635 --> 00:02:16,637
was at the start
of the Renaissance."
46
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Hey, you can never
be too careful.
47
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Aw, don't worry.
48
00:02:20,707 --> 00:02:22,943
Those Dark Ages
ain't never coming back.
49
00:02:23,010 --> 00:02:24,811
We got frescoes, we got spinach
50
00:02:24,878 --> 00:02:28,248
and this delicious new thing
called a pizza.
51
00:02:28,315 --> 00:02:30,684
I'm the original Ray.
52
00:02:30,751 --> 00:02:33,153
Well, I am‐a Famous Ray.
53
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Basta!
54
00:02:34,488 --> 00:02:36,690
(overlapping shouting)
55
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What about me, Little‐a Caesar?
56
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Pizza! Pizza!
57
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Ouchie! Ouchie!
58
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Et tu, Noidus?
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00:02:47,434 --> 00:02:49,670
LISA: "Young Lisanardo
was soon an apprentice
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00:02:49,736 --> 00:02:52,139
"to the most famous artist
in Florence,
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00:02:52,205 --> 00:02:54,508
Andrea del Verrocchio."
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00:02:54,574 --> 00:02:56,243
Whoever paints
the sweetest cherub
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00:02:56,309 --> 00:02:59,513
will have the honor of having
my name signed on their work.
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00:02:59,579 --> 00:03:01,515
That's what great artists do.
65
00:03:03,517 --> 00:03:05,819
Excellent, Barticelli.
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Very nice, Dolphatello.
67
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Ralphael, what is this?
68
00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:12,826
My foot hands are brushes.
69
00:03:12,893 --> 00:03:15,095
(laughing)
70
00:03:16,296 --> 00:03:17,898
VEROCCHIO:
Jesus.
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00:03:17,964 --> 00:03:21,201
Your little angels are
so much better than my Jesus.
72
00:03:21,268 --> 00:03:23,603
- Is that wrong?
- (sighs) No.
73
00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:26,506
Your genius has shown me
what a failure I am.
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00:03:26,573 --> 00:03:29,376
I will never paint again.
75
00:03:30,577 --> 00:03:32,779
(cacophonous music playing)
76
00:03:33,814 --> 00:03:36,416
At least there are no geniuses
in here.
77
00:03:36,483 --> 00:03:38,552
(playing classical music)
78
00:03:38,618 --> 00:03:40,787
(sighs)
79
00:03:42,189 --> 00:03:44,124
What?
We can't all be great.
80
00:03:44,191 --> 00:03:45,525
Right, Mediocroto?
81
00:03:45,592 --> 00:03:48,328
Si. On every paper,
I get a C.
82
00:03:48,395 --> 00:03:51,498
We don't want you in our class.
You're too much better than us.
83
00:03:51,565 --> 00:03:54,367
Yeah, your gifts
come from heaven above.
84
00:03:54,434 --> 00:03:55,836
Uh, that's not true.
85
00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:58,171
♪ ♪
86
00:03:58,238 --> 00:04:00,173
Here's some more talent.
87
00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,175
Not a good time.
88
00:04:03,510 --> 00:04:06,980
♪ My gifts came down
from God above ♪
89
00:04:07,047 --> 00:04:11,485
♪ But talent
doesn't bring you love ♪
90
00:04:11,551 --> 00:04:16,089
♪ Although
my brilliant genius shone ♪
91
00:04:16,156 --> 00:04:20,360
♪ My last supper was all alone ♪
92
00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:24,564
♪ In 1470. ♪
93
00:04:24,631 --> 00:04:26,099
(crying)
94
00:04:28,468 --> 00:04:31,404
If you can't beat 'em, kill 'em.
95
00:04:31,471 --> 00:04:34,241
Use your genius
to invent weapons of war,
96
00:04:34,307 --> 00:04:37,210
just like I'm gonna invent
the Charleston.
97
00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:39,479
- ♪ ♪
- (scats)
98
00:04:41,882 --> 00:04:44,017
Ow, my appendages!
99
00:04:44,084 --> 00:04:45,519
I'll show them all.
100
00:04:45,585 --> 00:04:48,155
I'll show them all
in a secret diary
101
00:04:48,221 --> 00:04:51,491
that no one will decipher
for 400 years.
102
00:04:51,558 --> 00:04:53,026
(church bell tolling)
103
00:04:53,093 --> 00:04:54,427
(snores)
104
00:04:54,494 --> 00:04:55,662
(yawns)
105
00:04:55,729 --> 00:04:59,633
Oh, what to invent?
What to invent?
106
00:05:08,842 --> 00:05:10,343
Portable siege engines.
107
00:05:10,410 --> 00:05:12,078
Flamethrowing mirrors.
108
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:14,447
A waterpowered stabbing wheel.
109
00:05:14,514 --> 00:05:16,316
Hmm. With these,
we could kill
110
00:05:16,383 --> 00:05:18,185
the most evil people
in the world:
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00:05:18,251 --> 00:05:20,654
slightly different Christians.
112
00:05:24,925 --> 00:05:28,195
- MAN: Ow!
- This is your true masterpiece.
113
00:05:28,261 --> 00:05:30,197
Why did you kill us?
114
00:05:30,263 --> 00:05:31,398
Scusi.
115
00:05:32,199 --> 00:05:34,467
Ow! Ow! Ow!
116
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Ooh.
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00:05:39,406 --> 00:05:41,341
I'm going to kill you all.
118
00:05:41,408 --> 00:05:43,577
It's my only pathway to pope.
119
00:05:43,643 --> 00:05:45,579
Cardinals suck.
120
00:05:45,645 --> 00:05:48,114
Go, Cubs!
121
00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:49,649
"Lisanardo had learned
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00:05:49,716 --> 00:05:52,385
"that using her intellect
for war was blasphemy
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00:05:52,452 --> 00:05:56,022
"but using it for art
would make it endure forever.
124
00:05:56,089 --> 00:05:59,893
She escaped to France
and retired in happiness."
125
00:06:00,727 --> 00:06:03,663
I'll be out in a sec.
Keep the engine running.
126
00:06:03,730 --> 00:06:06,366
(grunting)
127
00:06:06,433 --> 00:06:08,235
Lisanardo,
I have many questions.
128
00:06:08,301 --> 00:06:10,370
Why are you hitting yourself?
129
00:06:10,437 --> 00:06:12,472
A nerd says what?
And how is it possible
130
00:06:12,539 --> 00:06:16,343
that I am rubber and you are
glue, et cetera, et cetera?
131
00:06:16,409 --> 00:06:18,345
I will answer all questions
132
00:06:18,411 --> 00:06:22,315
just as soon as I finish
my masterpiece, my king.
133
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:26,219
♪ Mona Lisa, Mona Lisa ♪
134
00:06:26,286 --> 00:06:29,890
♪ Men have named you ♪
135
00:06:29,956 --> 00:06:33,627
♪ You're so like the lady
with the mystic smile. ♪
136
00:06:33,693 --> 00:06:36,663
Well, if this doesn't get
Ron Howard to direct,
137
00:06:36,730 --> 00:06:38,265
I don't know what will.
138
00:06:42,102 --> 00:06:44,280
Real humble, Lis, making
yourself into Leonardo da Vinci.
139
00:06:44,304 --> 00:06:46,072
Shouldn't you be in school?
140
00:06:46,139 --> 00:06:47,507
Eh, it was art, which I hate.
141
00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:49,376
Well, if you hate
the formal study of art,
142
00:06:49,442 --> 00:06:51,778
you're just like another artist
I'd like to discuss
143
00:06:51,845 --> 00:06:54,347
who also had trouble
with the Academy.
144
00:06:54,414 --> 00:06:55,849
You must have a fever,
145
00:06:55,916 --> 00:06:58,818
because that segue was sweaty.
146
00:07:02,355 --> 00:07:03,657
Unimaginative and boring.
147
00:07:03,723 --> 00:07:04,991
A.
148
00:07:05,058 --> 00:07:07,394
Milhouse, this has nothing
I haven't seen before.
149
00:07:07,460 --> 00:07:08,460
A‐plus.
150
00:07:08,495 --> 00:07:09,605
Bart, you've really
made me think.
151
00:07:09,629 --> 00:07:11,965
How dare you?
F‐minus.
152
00:07:12,032 --> 00:07:13,633
(grumbles)
153
00:07:15,602 --> 00:07:17,370
(kids laugh)
154
00:07:17,437 --> 00:07:19,606
(laughs)
Oh, a single entendre,
155
00:07:19,673 --> 00:07:21,942
the most complicated joke
there is.
156
00:07:22,008 --> 00:07:23,343
Class, settle, please,
157
00:07:23,410 --> 00:07:24,911
because today
we have a special treat:
158
00:07:24,978 --> 00:07:27,914
a visit from Paris'
leading Bacchus model.
159
00:07:27,981 --> 00:07:30,216
Sorry I'm late.
As a supermodel,
160
00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:33,553
I have to be eating
and drinking all day.
161
00:07:33,620 --> 00:07:34,621
(burps)
162
00:07:34,688 --> 00:07:37,590
You prefer robe open
or robe off?
163
00:07:37,657 --> 00:07:40,527
Uh, just cover your privates
with this walnut shell.
164
00:07:40,593 --> 00:07:42,996
Whoa, so roomy.
165
00:07:43,063 --> 00:07:44,264
Mm‐hmm...
166
00:07:44,331 --> 00:07:46,366
Gah!
That looks nothing like him.
167
00:07:46,433 --> 00:07:48,468
And it shouldn't. We're making
the art that we feel
168
00:07:48,535 --> 00:07:50,236
because we can't compete
with a camera,
169
00:07:50,303 --> 00:07:53,139
especially
modern compact cameras.
170
00:07:53,206 --> 00:07:56,376
Please hold still for 17 hours.
171
00:07:56,443 --> 00:07:58,244
Since you refuse
to paint the still life,
172
00:07:58,311 --> 00:08:00,413
you'll become the still life.
173
00:08:02,248 --> 00:08:04,017
Foie gras!
174
00:08:05,251 --> 00:08:07,454
("Orpheus in the Underworld:
Can Can" playing)
175
00:08:09,789 --> 00:08:14,194
This epoque just gets beller
and beller.
176
00:08:15,562 --> 00:08:16,796
Who is that kid?
177
00:08:16,863 --> 00:08:18,365
I am Toulouse‐Moetrec,
178
00:08:18,431 --> 00:08:21,201
the chronicler of the demimonde.
(chuckles)
179
00:08:21,267 --> 00:08:23,636
I keep liquor in my cane.
180
00:08:25,572 --> 00:08:28,508
Not very efficient.
Really not.
181
00:08:29,976 --> 00:08:32,712
ROOSTER:
Coq au vin, au vin!
182
00:08:37,283 --> 00:08:40,053
This is the greatest thing
I've ever seen,
183
00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:42,222
and I have seen, like,
five things!
184
00:08:42,288 --> 00:08:44,591
You, my friend.
You are a genius!
185
00:08:44,657 --> 00:08:48,194
Maybe we should stop
slavishly following the teacher
186
00:08:48,261 --> 00:08:49,929
and use our own minds
187
00:08:49,996 --> 00:08:52,232
to slavishly follow Bart.
188
00:08:52,298 --> 00:08:53,666
To the easels.
189
00:08:54,467 --> 00:08:58,038
All right, time to do
my first self‐portrait.
190
00:08:58,104 --> 00:09:01,408
Time to look in a mirror
for the first time in my life.
191
00:09:01,474 --> 00:09:04,177
I can only assume
that I am beautiful.
192
00:09:04,244 --> 00:09:06,046
All right, here we go.
193
00:09:06,112 --> 00:09:07,781
Looking now.
194
00:09:07,847 --> 00:09:09,449
(screams)
195
00:09:13,253 --> 00:09:14,821
(chuckles):
Oh, don't worry, sir.
196
00:09:14,888 --> 00:09:16,699
You won't see anything here
that'll encourage debate,
197
00:09:16,723 --> 00:09:19,426
provoke thought or be out
of place in a dentist's office.
198
00:09:19,492 --> 00:09:21,194
Ah, well,
I'm sure this will have
199
00:09:21,261 --> 00:09:24,564
a definite je ne sais quoi?!
200
00:09:26,433 --> 00:09:27,767
Ugh! Oh!
201
00:09:27,834 --> 00:09:31,304
The emperor is coming here
to look at this artwork today.
202
00:09:31,371 --> 00:09:34,074
His Majesty will feed us
to the guillotine!
203
00:09:34,140 --> 00:09:36,109
That hasn't been used in years.
204
00:09:36,176 --> 00:09:38,211
No one even remembers
how to work it.
205
00:09:38,278 --> 00:09:41,414
Pull up, let go.
How hard can that be?
206
00:09:41,481 --> 00:09:42,482
(groans)
207
00:09:42,549 --> 00:09:44,451
Mon cher, le superintendent,
208
00:09:44,517 --> 00:09:48,088
which of our works will you be
entering into the royal Salon?
209
00:09:48,154 --> 00:09:51,091
None.
You are all refusés.
210
00:09:51,157 --> 00:09:52,659
What about our student loans?
211
00:09:52,725 --> 00:09:55,228
Oh, they'll be refunded.
We are not barbarians.
212
00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:56,763
I mean, uh, come on.
213
00:09:56,830 --> 00:09:59,866
Oh, if only we could get our art
in front of the emperor.
214
00:09:59,933 --> 00:10:03,103
Monarchs love challenges
to the established order.
215
00:10:03,169 --> 00:10:05,371
No, no.
But there is one thing
216
00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:07,340
the emperor loves
more than anything.
217
00:10:07,407 --> 00:10:09,843
- France?
- No, he hates France.
218
00:10:09,909 --> 00:10:12,112
But he loves cheese.
219
00:10:12,178 --> 00:10:15,548
Look who he appointed
mayor of Toulon.
220
00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:17,617
♪ ♪
221
00:10:25,325 --> 00:10:27,127
- Hmm.
- Do we have a winner?
222
00:10:27,193 --> 00:10:29,395
Keep your pants on, Moulin Huge.
223
00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:33,666
There are 44 more galleries
of mediocre art to judge.
224
00:10:34,501 --> 00:10:36,569
What is that cheese doing?
225
00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:39,272
Oh, you know French cheese.
Very runny.
226
00:10:39,339 --> 00:10:42,108
I warned them not to make cheese
into wheels.
227
00:10:42,175 --> 00:10:43,977
Cubes were fine.
228
00:10:44,043 --> 00:10:45,979
I get motion sickness,
229
00:10:46,045 --> 00:10:48,281
and I'm lactose intolerant.
230
00:10:48,348 --> 00:10:51,151
Hurry.
He's biting his way in!
231
00:10:54,220 --> 00:10:55,421
What the...
232
00:10:58,358 --> 00:10:59,692
Aw, once again,
233
00:10:59,759 --> 00:11:03,096
I have just cheese
that is not cheese.
234
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:05,098
Your Majesty,
if you'll take a seat,
235
00:11:05,165 --> 00:11:07,367
we'll show you something
really special,
236
00:11:07,433 --> 00:11:10,537
a transformation of art
from a rote copying of nature
237
00:11:10,603 --> 00:11:12,739
into the experiences, ideas,
238
00:11:12,805 --> 00:11:14,541
and mind of the artist.
239
00:11:14,607 --> 00:11:17,510
You had me at "take a seat."
240
00:11:17,577 --> 00:11:21,214
I don't know art,
but I know what I like.
241
00:11:21,281 --> 00:11:24,217
And I like eating
and not looking at art.
242
00:11:24,284 --> 00:11:28,021
I hereby award you
the Royal Medallion.
243
00:11:28,087 --> 00:11:31,224
(chuckles) Congratulations
on your discerning eye,
244
00:11:31,291 --> 00:11:32,225
Your Majesty.
245
00:11:32,292 --> 00:11:33,927
I love this pupil.
246
00:11:33,993 --> 00:11:37,797
Is this not the student that you
expelled from the royal salon?
247
00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:40,833
Well, I‐‐ Uh, that is, I, uh...
248
00:11:40,900 --> 00:11:43,036
Just pretend I'm not here.
249
00:11:43,102 --> 00:11:46,239
Uh, sir, is your tongue
sticking out because you're dead
250
00:11:46,306 --> 00:11:48,007
or because you're mad at me?
251
00:11:48,074 --> 00:11:49,542
Uh, little of both.
252
00:11:49,609 --> 00:11:51,844
Yeah.
(exhales)
253
00:11:51,911 --> 00:11:54,113
("La Marseillaise" playing)
254
00:12:01,454 --> 00:12:03,489
Oh, sure, Maggie.
That's easy.
255
00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:07,227
Renaissance artists love to put
babies in their paintings,
256
00:12:07,293 --> 00:12:08,895
especially baby angels.
257
00:12:08,962 --> 00:12:11,731
Let's just not think about why
there were so many babies
258
00:12:11,798 --> 00:12:13,633
in heaven, shall we?
259
00:12:15,168 --> 00:12:17,370
("Ride of the Valkyries"
playing)
260
00:12:29,916 --> 00:12:31,384
Hey!
261
00:12:53,206 --> 00:12:55,375
Damn it!
262
00:12:55,441 --> 00:12:57,910
So, telling stories
about art, huh?
263
00:12:57,977 --> 00:13:00,980
Do they have one about a fat guy
whose wife is too good for him?
264
00:13:01,047 --> 00:13:02,248
Stupid fat guy.
265
00:13:02,315 --> 00:13:04,517
Bet he doesn't even know
what's going on.
266
00:13:04,584 --> 00:13:08,521
Well, Dad, have you ever heard
of Diego Rivera and Frida Kahlo?
267
00:13:08,588 --> 00:13:10,256
(scoffs)
Lisa, I haven't even heard
268
00:13:10,323 --> 00:13:12,859
of Jackson Pollock
and Lee Krasner.
269
00:13:12,925 --> 00:13:17,230
Well, Diego and Frida
were married in 1929.
270
00:13:17,297 --> 00:13:19,365
♪ ♪
271
00:13:19,432 --> 00:13:24,103
I now pronounce
you esposo and esposa.
272
00:13:24,170 --> 00:13:26,839
You may now beso quite mucho.
273
00:13:26,906 --> 00:13:28,074
Mwah!
274
00:13:28,141 --> 00:13:30,943
(cheering)
275
00:13:31,010 --> 00:13:33,112
Spanish for "Best wishes!"
276
00:13:33,179 --> 00:13:35,948
Spanish for "Congratulations!"
277
00:13:36,015 --> 00:13:38,251
Spanish for "¡Muy bueno!"
278
00:13:38,318 --> 00:13:39,986
Amigos, familia,
279
00:13:40,053 --> 00:13:41,621
and El Barto.
280
00:13:41,688 --> 00:13:43,923
♪ Barto, El Barto ♪
281
00:13:43,990 --> 00:13:47,093
♪ The fox so cunning
and free. ♪
282
00:13:47,160 --> 00:13:49,262
The mysterious El Barto.
283
00:13:49,329 --> 00:13:51,664
Do you know
nobleman Don Bartholomew?
284
00:13:51,731 --> 00:13:55,101
He lives in that house
you come out of every night.
285
00:13:55,168 --> 00:13:57,503
¡Ay, caramba!
286
00:13:57,570 --> 00:13:59,706
Gosh, quite the swordsman.
287
00:13:59,772 --> 00:14:00,940
Slashed my shirt,
288
00:14:01,007 --> 00:14:03,209
did not even nick me.
289
00:14:04,010 --> 00:14:05,345
Move along, folks!
290
00:14:05,411 --> 00:14:07,613
It's gonna take me a while
to bleed out.
291
00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:09,949
(groans, chuckles)
That's clever‐‐
292
00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:11,751
a "B."
(exhales)
293
00:14:11,818 --> 00:14:14,354
I know I speak for my wife,
Frida Kahlo,
294
00:14:14,420 --> 00:14:17,357
when I say I couldn't imagine
life without you.
295
00:14:17,423 --> 00:14:19,859
But I also speak for my wife,
Frida Kahlo,
296
00:14:19,926 --> 00:14:22,929
when I say we leave
for New York tomorrow!
297
00:14:22,995 --> 00:14:24,230
You never asked me!
298
00:14:24,297 --> 00:14:25,998
Don't worry.
As a woman,
299
00:14:26,065 --> 00:14:30,403
you will be treated with
much more respect in America.
300
00:14:32,805 --> 00:14:35,274
Diego, I know
you are a socialist,
301
00:14:35,341 --> 00:14:37,877
whilst I am
a lion of capitalism.
302
00:14:37,944 --> 00:14:39,746
Yes, we hate the capitalists.
303
00:14:39,812 --> 00:14:42,949
Right now,
a young socialist is being born
304
00:14:43,015 --> 00:14:44,117
who will take them down.
305
00:14:44,183 --> 00:14:45,985
Mr. Bernie Sanders.
306
00:14:46,052 --> 00:14:47,754
I hope he's quick about it.
307
00:14:47,820 --> 00:14:51,124
Getting a cootie shot should not
cost your lunch money.
308
00:14:51,190 --> 00:14:53,025
And if you don't listen to me,
309
00:14:53,092 --> 00:14:54,961
listen to the Bernie Babies.
310
00:14:55,027 --> 00:14:57,530
What? Everybody's got goons.
311
00:14:57,597 --> 00:14:59,999
I disavow that and welcome it.
312
00:15:00,066 --> 00:15:01,300
Señor Rockefeller,
313
00:15:01,367 --> 00:15:03,936
what is it
you are looking for from Diego?
314
00:15:04,003 --> 00:15:05,738
Frida, please!
I'm so sorry.
315
00:15:05,805 --> 00:15:08,574
My wife does not understand
these discussions.
316
00:15:08,641 --> 00:15:12,478
I understand
that he is paying you $21,000
317
00:15:12,545 --> 00:15:15,481
for a mural
for his new Rockefeller Center
318
00:15:15,548 --> 00:15:18,117
with the theme
"man at the crossroads."
319
00:15:18,184 --> 00:15:20,086
$21,000.
320
00:15:20,153 --> 00:15:21,954
Do you know what that is
in today's money?
321
00:15:22,021 --> 00:15:24,824
$21,000.
322
00:15:24,891 --> 00:15:26,092
(whoops)
323
00:15:26,159 --> 00:15:28,728
This entire area
will be your canvas.
324
00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:31,097
(gasps)
I will need very tiny brushes,
325
00:15:31,164 --> 00:15:32,598
a magnifying glass
326
00:15:32,665 --> 00:15:35,001
and a huge bottle of tequila.
327
00:15:35,067 --> 00:15:36,002
No worm.
328
00:15:36,068 --> 00:15:37,470
A snake.
329
00:15:37,537 --> 00:15:39,181
(chuckles softly)
You drive a hard bargain,
330
00:15:39,205 --> 00:15:40,740
but this is just a model.
331
00:15:40,807 --> 00:15:43,643
The real Rockefeller Center
will be 66 stories high.
332
00:15:43,709 --> 00:15:47,980
And every Christmas, we will
kill and decorate a giant tree
333
00:15:48,047 --> 00:15:51,284
as a warning to the other trees.
334
00:15:52,151 --> 00:15:53,553
(grumbles)
335
00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:56,122
Oh, Frida.
Let us celebrate our triumph
336
00:15:56,189 --> 00:15:58,090
with some snuggle‐issimo.
337
00:15:58,157 --> 00:16:00,226
- No.
- (gasps) What's wrong, my dear?
338
00:16:00,293 --> 00:16:01,961
Is your unibrow hurting?
339
00:16:02,028 --> 00:16:04,697
You are selling out, my love.
340
00:16:06,999 --> 00:16:08,367
I am not selling out!
341
00:16:08,434 --> 00:16:10,837
I am doing this mural
for the little guy!
342
00:16:10,903 --> 00:16:12,638
People like him!
343
00:16:12,705 --> 00:16:15,441
Why are you washing windows
at night?
344
00:16:15,508 --> 00:16:18,110
Who said I was washing windows?
345
00:16:19,412 --> 00:16:21,948
As for you, squander your gift,
346
00:16:22,014 --> 00:16:23,616
spit on your talent.
347
00:16:23,683 --> 00:16:26,886
- I am glad we are in agreement.
- (huffs)
348
00:16:26,953 --> 00:16:29,489
But what will I do
while you work on your mural?
349
00:16:29,555 --> 00:16:31,123
Paint a happy self‐portrait,
350
00:16:31,190 --> 00:16:32,792
smiling ear to ear,
351
00:16:32,859 --> 00:16:34,327
not a care in the world.
352
00:16:34,393 --> 00:16:36,829
That's not who I am, Diego!
353
00:16:36,896 --> 00:16:38,231
I love you, too.
354
00:16:38,297 --> 00:16:40,500
Going to the bar!
355
00:16:41,300 --> 00:16:43,636
Paint.
Paint your misery.
356
00:16:43,703 --> 00:16:46,405
Also, leave.
Leave your husband.
357
00:16:46,472 --> 00:16:48,407
Which one of you is the angel?
358
00:16:48,474 --> 00:16:49,551
- We both are.
- We both are.
359
00:16:49,575 --> 00:16:51,544
That's how mad you're feeling.
360
00:16:51,611 --> 00:16:52,812
Oh.
361
00:16:52,879 --> 00:16:55,248
Back to Heaven!
362
00:16:57,884 --> 00:16:59,819
Buenas noches, darling.
363
00:16:59,886 --> 00:17:01,587
What a crazy night I had.
364
00:17:01,654 --> 00:17:04,790
Now we got to get our stories
straight about Zeppo.
365
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:07,059
It was an accident, okay?
366
00:17:07,126 --> 00:17:08,528
(honks)
367
00:17:08,594 --> 00:17:10,162
Ah...
368
00:17:10,229 --> 00:17:11,964
Starting a new painting?
369
00:17:12,031 --> 00:17:15,434
Yes.
I am painting my feelings.
370
00:17:15,501 --> 00:17:17,436
Oh! Oh!
371
00:17:17,503 --> 00:17:18,237
Wow.
372
00:17:18,304 --> 00:17:20,172
So strong, so brave,
373
00:17:20,239 --> 00:17:21,908
so true to herself.
374
00:17:21,974 --> 00:17:22,974
Mm...
375
00:17:23,009 --> 00:17:24,343
(groans)
376
00:17:24,410 --> 00:17:26,846
My darling, I am not
half the artist you are.
377
00:17:26,913 --> 00:17:29,348
Diego, what are you saying?
378
00:17:29,415 --> 00:17:32,685
I am saying I've underestimated
you all this time.
379
00:17:32,752 --> 00:17:33,853
You are a genius!
380
00:17:33,920 --> 00:17:36,856
From now on,
I will show my awe of you
381
00:17:36,923 --> 00:17:38,457
by sleeping with other women.
382
00:17:38,524 --> 00:17:40,159
Starting an hour ago.
383
00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:43,195
And I will sleep with other
women starting two hours ago.
384
00:17:43,262 --> 00:17:45,898
I'm so glad
I don't hear what you say.
385
00:17:45,965 --> 00:17:49,835
But I will do something I have
not done in our entire marriage:
386
00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:51,504
what you want.
387
00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:53,906
Well, actions speak louder
than words.
388
00:17:53,973 --> 00:17:57,243
No. Unless the action is the
demolition of a big building,
389
00:17:57,310 --> 00:17:58,945
words are usually louder.
390
00:17:59,011 --> 00:18:00,713
Everything is a fight.
391
00:18:00,780 --> 00:18:02,315
I completely disagree.
392
00:18:02,381 --> 00:18:04,450
But just wait
till you see what I do.
393
00:18:04,517 --> 00:18:06,452
You'll be pleased
with what I do not do,
394
00:18:06,519 --> 00:18:08,654
and you will love what I do do.
395
00:18:08,721 --> 00:18:09,789
Good night!
396
00:18:09,855 --> 00:18:11,791
(grumbles)
397
00:18:11,857 --> 00:18:14,093
Welcome to Rockefeller Center,
398
00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:15,494
a temple of capitalism.
399
00:18:15,561 --> 00:18:17,196
To find a taller building,
400
00:18:17,263 --> 00:18:19,465
you'd have to walk
a full seven blocks.
401
00:18:19,532 --> 00:18:21,100
(chuckles):
Long blocks.
402
00:18:21,167 --> 00:18:22,668
With people bumping you.
403
00:18:22,735 --> 00:18:26,205
Enough already. While the art
is still deco, okay?
404
00:18:28,240 --> 00:18:29,675
For you, my darling.
405
00:18:29,742 --> 00:18:32,244
Man at the Crossroads.
406
00:18:33,179 --> 00:18:34,614
Rich people.
Yes, excellent.
407
00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:37,116
The cosmos.
Yes, makes sense.
408
00:18:37,183 --> 00:18:38,417
A worker.
409
00:18:38,484 --> 00:18:40,219
Well, I suppose
it couldn't be helped.
410
00:18:40,286 --> 00:18:41,520
Fascist army.
411
00:18:41,587 --> 00:18:43,923
Always welcome in any lobby.
412
00:18:43,990 --> 00:18:46,092
Hmm. Who's that fellow?
413
00:18:46,158 --> 00:18:49,228
With the beard
and the Bolshevik smile.
414
00:18:49,295 --> 00:18:52,832
That is the founder
of Soviet Russia, Lenin.
415
00:18:52,898 --> 00:18:54,634
But‐but‐but he's a communist.
416
00:18:54,700 --> 00:18:56,936
Oh, he just attended
a couple of meetings.
417
00:18:57,003 --> 00:19:00,106
I can't have a communist
in my colossus of capitalism.
418
00:19:00,172 --> 00:19:01,340
Paint over it.
419
00:19:01,407 --> 00:19:02,407
No!
420
00:19:02,441 --> 00:19:03,809
Then you will lose
your commission,
421
00:19:03,876 --> 00:19:06,612
and I won't let you be
the model for Atlas.
422
00:19:07,813 --> 00:19:09,181
Hmm...
423
00:19:09,248 --> 00:19:10,683
I don't care.
424
00:19:10,750 --> 00:19:13,552
There is one person
I want to be proud of me,
425
00:19:13,619 --> 00:19:14,787
no matter what.
426
00:19:14,854 --> 00:19:17,356
(gasps)
Oh, my darling.
427
00:19:17,423 --> 00:19:19,892
Release the hounds.
428
00:19:19,959 --> 00:19:21,460
(barking in distance)
429
00:19:21,527 --> 00:19:23,362
They're on the 66th floor, sir.
430
00:19:23,429 --> 00:19:26,065
They should be here
in about 25 minutes.
431
00:19:26,132 --> 00:19:28,367
(barking continues)
432
00:19:29,635 --> 00:19:32,238
But‐but‐but why is it
just sitting there?
433
00:19:32,304 --> 00:19:33,973
I, uh...
I think they may be eating
434
00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:35,808
the elevator operator, sir.
435
00:19:35,875 --> 00:19:37,510
Let us leave, my darling,
436
00:19:37,576 --> 00:19:39,779
with our scruples intact.
437
00:19:39,845 --> 00:19:41,247
Push the owner's button.
438
00:19:41,313 --> 00:19:43,382
- But...
- I said push it.
439
00:19:43,449 --> 00:19:44,750
Aah!
440
00:19:46,752 --> 00:19:48,187
Ironically, in time,
441
00:19:48,254 --> 00:19:50,589
Frida became more famous
than Diego,
442
00:19:50,656 --> 00:19:54,393
an icon for brilliant
female artists everywhere.
443
00:19:54,460 --> 00:19:57,129
This is really, really good.
444
00:19:57,196 --> 00:19:58,664
If I play my cards right,
445
00:19:58,731 --> 00:20:01,867
I will direct a Rick and Morty.
446
00:20:01,934 --> 00:20:04,136
♪ ♪
447
00:20:12,111 --> 00:20:14,513
All right, now it's time for
the story of Vincent van Moe.
448
00:20:14,580 --> 00:20:18,684
(chuckles)
♪ Bar‐ry, bar‐ry night ♪
449
00:20:19,585 --> 00:20:23,622
♪ Squeeze your bar rag
clean and dry ♪
450
00:20:23,689 --> 00:20:27,226
♪ For the last time,
say there's no Wi‐Fi ♪
451
00:20:27,293 --> 00:20:32,131
♪ With eyes that know
the darkness of my soul ♪
452
00:20:32,198 --> 00:20:33,365
(cries)
453
00:20:33,432 --> 00:20:37,503
♪ Serving them the dregs ♪
454
00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:39,371
♪ Something's growing ♪
455
00:20:39,438 --> 00:20:42,441
♪ On my eggs ♪
456
00:20:42,508 --> 00:20:45,578
♪ Add tap water to the kegs ♪
457
00:20:45,644 --> 00:20:49,849
♪ And search the bushes
for my missing ear ♪
458
00:20:51,617 --> 00:20:54,787
♪ Now the show is done ♪
459
00:20:56,222 --> 00:20:57,490
♪ Except the part ♪
460
00:20:57,556 --> 00:21:00,726
♪ Where the chick goes "Shh!" ♪
461
00:21:00,793 --> 00:21:04,730
♪ But no one ever obeys her ♪
462
00:21:04,797 --> 00:21:08,868
♪ 'Cause, really,
what's she shushing for? ♪
463
00:21:08,934 --> 00:21:10,369
This one ain't so great.
464
00:21:10,436 --> 00:21:12,505
♪ I will not listen ♪
465
00:21:12,571 --> 00:21:15,808
♪ She's not the boss of me ♪
466
00:21:17,743 --> 00:21:22,481
♪ And she will never be. ♪
467
00:21:23,616 --> 00:21:25,718
(crying)
468
00:21:25,785 --> 00:21:27,686
End the credits!
469
00:21:27,753 --> 00:21:28,754
Shh!