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The Simpsons - Season 20 Episode 03
"Double, Double, Boy in Trouble"
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~ VO Created by HoLLoW ~
~ www.tv4user.de ~
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~ This English Subtitle is brought to you by ~
~ www.tv4user.de ~
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~ www.tv4user.de ~
~ Biggest German Website for Subtitles ~
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Stupid shopping list,
turning food into work.
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- Bart!
- Look at me! I'm doin' something!
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You better settle down, boy,
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or I'll drag you into the blind
spot of that security camera.
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and beat you with one of those
big thick women's magazines
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with all the ads in it!
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Mr. Homer, why don't you forget
your worries with this...
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the last lottery ticket on the roll.
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They say the last one is lucky!
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Unlike all the others.
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Lucky!
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Or not.
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Hmm, you make a good case.
I'll take it!
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Dad, look at me! Look at me!
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Cannonball!
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No!
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I'll take that last
lottery ticket, Apu.
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Again!
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I won! I won!
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$50,000! Ponder this, Homer.
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This ticket would have been yours
if your kid hadn't been screwin' around.
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That is true. Another ironic
"Tale of the Kwik-E-Mart."
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You just cost me $200,000!
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- I thought it was 50.
- I was gonna bet it on the dogs!
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All the groceries seem
to have been balled up in anger.
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That kid has become
a Dennis-level menace!
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Now, Homer, boys will be boys.
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Bart cost us $50,000!
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I'm going to Moe's.
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Lenny, Lenny, he's our guy!
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Got the ticket Homer didn't buy!
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Oh, cheer up, Homer.
The drinks are on Lenny.
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I don't want your pity booze.
I'll pay for it myself.
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Uh, I gotta check with Lenny on that.
Uh, is that all right,
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Nope, Lucky Lenny's buying
all the drinks tonight.
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Sorry, Homer,
but here's a compromise:
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why don't you both pay for the drink?
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And tip.
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I just want to tell you all that
even before I won this money,
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I was the luckiest guy in the world
'cause I got friends like you.
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That's why I'm spending my
remaing Scratcher winnings
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on a kick-ass party
for all my friends!
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Where's Bart? We're gonna be late
for Lenny's party.
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Don't waste your shot, Bart.
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You've got just enough cat pee
to soak two dorks.
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Bart Simpson! Did you just spray
water on me?!
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Uh... it was water this morning.
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Dang that Bart! Thanks to him, I have
to wear my backup dress,
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- which makes my arms look fat.
- Oh, you look great.
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Ha ha! You feel self-conscious.
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Why can't our son just behave?
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Well, Marge, you did have that one
sip of alcohol while you were pregnant.
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I now christen this ship
the "USS Float 'N' Shoot!"
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Ay, caramba!
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Ay, caramba!
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Mmm, that was unforgivable.
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But I'm beginning to think
that Bart's bad behavior
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- is more than just a phase.
- Bart's flicking boogers on me!
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They're not boogers!
They're clumps of rubber cement.
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That I stored in my nose.
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Stop it, both of you!
Don't make me drive into that tree
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You know I will!
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No flicking boogers,
and no driving into trees!
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- Yes, ma'am.
- Yes, ma'am.
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Wow, Lenny went all out!
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In the beginning, there was darkness,
so God created man.
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But man was alone.
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God created the animals and birds.
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But man was still lonely.
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So God said,
"Let there be friends!"
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Thank you for being a friend,
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Traveled down the road
and back again
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Your heart is true,
You're a pal and a confidant
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Thank you for being a friend
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Thank you for being a friend
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Thank you for being a friend
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Thank you for letting me
take home the centerpiece.
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These are going right
on my mom's grave.
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Thank you for being a friend.
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Lenny, it was
pretty cool of you
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to spend your lotto winnings
on your pals.
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It was worth it so everyone
could have a wonderful evening
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and go home with a gift bag.
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Vacuuming robot!
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Now, before you all leave, I know
everyone hates vacuuming, and loves robots...
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These innocent robots couldn't
have done this on their own.
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Someone would've had
to turn them all on at once,
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and then imbue them with some
kind of malevolent sentience.
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Yep, there it is.
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Well, whoever did this must be
long gone by now, Chief.
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I don't know how we'll ever catch him.
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Kill! Kill! Kill!
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Hold it right there, Bart!
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Can you tell us anything
about who did this?
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Bart make Bot bad!
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- Uh, I can explain.
- Kill the child!
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Bart, I've had it with you!
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- I'm taking away all your TV privileges.
- You already did that.
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- Okay, then videogames.
- That, too.
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No more non-dice board games.
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What? You can't take my Balderdash!
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I just did.
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I don't mean to be bad.
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I don't know why I do
the things I do.
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No one understands me.
I wish I had a different family.
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I feel exactly the same way.
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Oh, my God.
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You look like a dorky version of me!
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And you look like
a dimwitted version of me!
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And you two are
ten-year-old versions of me!
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The three of us could create
quite a lot of mischief,
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but I have to fly back to New York.
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That's where my wife and I live.
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That's her. You want to see pictures
of our kids?
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name's Simon Woosterfield.
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"Woosterfield"? Your family owns
this place!
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And Woosterfield Arena!
Bonnie Raitt played there!
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You guys must be loaded!
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Yes. No, but the funny thing
about being rich
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is sometimes you wake up feeling...
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Terrific? Incredible?
Happy as a clown?
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Oh, yeah, I'm livin' the dream.
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Wouldn't it be hilarious
if we switched places
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and lived each other's
lives for a while?
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I'm pretty attached
to my family, and...
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Get out here, boy!
I want to punish you
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- before I get drunk and merciful!
- Deal.
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My father's name is Homer.
My mother's name is Mom.
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My sister's name is Lisa,
but everyone calls her Loser.
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My butler's name is Chester. I have a brother
named Devon and a sister named Quenly.
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Oh, and my horse is called Shadowfax.
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You can't miss him. He's the
only Lipizzaner in our stable.
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Lipizzaner... got it.
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There you are, Master Simon!
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Thank you, uh, Lipizzaner.
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As you say, sir. Watch your head.
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You ruin everything!
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Driver, laugh at those people for me.
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My pleasure, sir.
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McMansion. McMansion.
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McMansion.
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McDonald's?
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McDreamy.
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McSteamy.
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McMansion.
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Fleetwood Mac,
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and Macauley Culkin.
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And this is your home, sir.
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But of course you already knew that.
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Awesome!
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Awesome!
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Awesome!
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This is my bedroom?
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A candy corn volcano!
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A ceiling from Saddam's palace!
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Ooh, and a racecar bed.
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That really races!
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Wow, a cool poster of Joe Montana!
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It's not a poster.
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I'm the real deal. Every day I stand here
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the family donates a million
dollars to Notre Dame.
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Did you know the words "Notre Dame" are French,
but the team is
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the Fighting Irish? That's the kind of thing
I think about in here.
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- Back in the poster, gabby.
- Yes, sir.
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Milhouse, it's me. Check out
the caller ID on your phone.
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"Blocked Number"? That service is $3.65 a month.
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Did you switch places with a millionaire kid
who looks just like you?
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Just sit tight. I'm sending a car.
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Why are these noodles orange?
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I made it with Cheetos,
just like you like it.
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If the sauce is too thick,
I can add more root beer.
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00:11:38,943 --> 00:11:40,324
Maybe I'm just not hungry.
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Human garbage can to the rescue.
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Mmm... so at work today,
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we got a memo saying
everyone's getting new chairs.
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- Father, could you...
- Talk louder? You bet.
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Naturally, I threw my old chair
in the Dumpster right away,
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but then Lenny said:
"No, that was the new chair.
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That memo was two months old."
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So now I'm sitting on an orange crate.
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- I never felt so...
- Please stop spitting food on me!
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Keep your meal in your mouth,
you semiliterate spew-monkey.
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That's it, boy. You're
going to bed without supper.
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That was an odd thing
for Bart to say.
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Maybe he's going through... certain changes.
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If that boy thinks I'm paying
to put him through four years of puberty,
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00:12:25,390 --> 00:12:29,477
forget it.
I'm made of hormones.
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Mr. La-Di-Da...
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This is the greatest great hall
I've ever eaten in, Bart.
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I mean Simon.
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This must be my half-brother
and half-sister.
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00:12:47,622 --> 00:12:50,290
They're beautiful.
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00:12:50,325 --> 00:12:53,804
I mean, just the girl.
I didn't notice the beautiful boy.
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00:12:53,839 --> 00:12:57,900
So I said, "Dad, I wanted a
Range Rover, not a Land Rover.
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00:12:57,935 --> 00:13:00,557
This is the worst
Martin Luther King Day ever."
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00:13:00,592 --> 00:13:04,356
Well, well, if it isn't
our half-wit half-brother.
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00:13:10,379 --> 00:13:12,610
The old hot spoon. But why?
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00:13:12,645 --> 00:13:15,771
Because you're our half-brother,
you're blocking our full
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00:13:15,806 --> 00:13:18,913
- inheritance and we hate you.
- Oh, now I get it.
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00:13:20,893 --> 00:13:23,879
Bart, I have a crush
on your new sister.
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00:13:23,914 --> 00:13:25,445
You had a crush on my old sister.
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00:13:25,480 --> 00:13:28,172
Yeah, but that was never going
to happen.
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00:13:30,972 --> 00:13:33,452
Give me back my newspaper.
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00:13:33,487 --> 00:13:35,462
Homer, it's not a real paper.
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00:13:35,497 --> 00:13:37,392
It's a rubber chew toy.
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00:13:37,427 --> 00:13:41,258
For your information, The Daily Growl
is the only newspaper
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that's not afraid to say how great
this country is.
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00:13:45,534 --> 00:13:47,147
How's the war going?
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00:13:47,182 --> 00:13:48,627
We're winning? That's great.
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00:13:48,662 --> 00:13:50,344
And our standing abroad?
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00:13:50,379 --> 00:13:51,779
Fantastic.
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00:13:56,003 --> 00:13:59,766
This place is insane. Tonight,
I got sent to bed without dinner.
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00:13:59,801 --> 00:14:02,705
Oh, yeah. Well, what's up
with your brother and sister?
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00:14:02,740 --> 00:14:04,848
They're jealous because
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00:14:04,883 --> 00:14:07,614
my father left their mother
to be with my mother, to...
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00:14:07,649 --> 00:14:09,831
Eh, you lost me. Well, got to go.
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00:14:09,866 --> 00:14:11,838
Enjoy the upper-lower
middle class.
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00:14:14,649 --> 00:14:17,631
Bart, honey, I saw
you didn't like your dinner,
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00:14:17,666 --> 00:14:21,257
so I thought you might like
pepperoni pizza with the crust cut off.
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00:14:21,292 --> 00:14:24,847
Now, let me tuck you in,
fluff your pillow,
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and sprinkle a little fairy dust
to keep the monsters away.
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00:14:28,905 --> 00:14:30,207
It's cinnamon.
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00:14:31,744 --> 00:14:33,696
Nighty-night, sweetheart.
228
00:14:35,587 --> 00:14:37,283
I could get used to this.
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00:14:39,299 --> 00:14:44,046
Fancy party. This is like a rap video
before the rappers show up.
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00:14:46,993 --> 00:14:49,886
Simon, have you ever seen
the family mausoleum?
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00:14:49,921 --> 00:14:51,917
All the Woosterfields
will be buried here.
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00:14:51,952 --> 00:14:55,935
Do you know that after a hundred years
dead bodies turn to red licorice?
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00:14:56,655 --> 00:14:58,124
Whoa-ho, let me at it.
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00:15:01,465 --> 00:15:03,511
Help! Let me out.
235
00:15:03,546 --> 00:15:05,957
I have my doubts about this licorice!
236
00:15:07,780 --> 00:15:09,786
Oh, Mr. Burns, I'm really sorry.
237
00:15:09,821 --> 00:15:12,053
Nonsense, young Woosterfield.
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00:15:12,088 --> 00:15:13,956
Your fortune is greater than mine.
It is, it is I
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00:15:13,991 --> 00:15:17,865
who am at your service.
Smithers, fetch us some lemonade.
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00:15:22,379 --> 00:15:24,671
- All they had was Sunnytime Pink.
- Premix?
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00:15:24,706 --> 00:15:28,759
I beg your forgiveness, lad.
Smithers, pour it down your pants.
242
00:15:30,559 --> 00:15:34,242
Now, squish about in those pants,
rewetting every hour.
243
00:15:38,236 --> 00:15:39,637
Come with me.
244
00:15:41,061 --> 00:15:42,372
You know, Master Simon,
245
00:15:42,407 --> 00:15:44,892
I too was once the youngest
in a wealthy family.
246
00:15:44,927 --> 00:15:47,185
You were once the youngest
of something?
247
00:15:47,220 --> 00:15:51,690
But fortune ended up smiling on me
while snuffing the life from my siblings.
248
00:15:51,886 --> 00:15:54,018
My older brother was trampled
by a horse.
249
00:15:54,053 --> 00:15:55,611
My sister died of a poisoned potato.
250
00:15:55,646 --> 00:15:57,693
My twin was shot.
That girl was stabbed
251
00:15:57,728 --> 00:15:59,452
He ate another poisoned potato.
252
00:15:59,487 --> 00:16:02,312
Spontaneous combustion.
Fell down a well. Potato. Potato,
253
00:16:02,347 --> 00:16:04,119
and impaled on the Chrysler Building.
254
00:16:05,265 --> 00:16:07,185
Wow, only you survived.
255
00:16:07,220 --> 00:16:09,992
Which means the entire fortune went to you.
256
00:16:10,027 --> 00:16:11,802
Yes, funny that.
257
00:16:11,837 --> 00:16:16,465
A word of caution, young Woosterfield:
watch out for those closest to you.
258
00:16:16,717 --> 00:16:19,100
- Devon and Quenly?
- You don't know when they'll strike...
259
00:16:19,135 --> 00:16:22,175
a boating accident,
a mishap during a ski trip,
260
00:16:22,210 --> 00:16:25,516
but rest assured, one way or another,
they will do you in.
261
00:16:25,732 --> 00:16:29,509
Oh, my God. Simon set me up.
262
00:16:29,544 --> 00:16:31,039
And all this time I thought he wanted the life
263
00:16:31,074 --> 00:16:33,943
of a stranger he met in the bathroom.
264
00:16:33,978 --> 00:16:37,152
Now, would you care to continue this conversation
on the teeter-totter?
265
00:16:39,303 --> 00:16:41,220
Why won't you come down?
266
00:16:41,255 --> 00:16:45,474
I told you I only weigh as
much as my clothes and keys.
267
00:16:54,314 --> 00:16:57,839
So, i looked down the barrel
of my Winchester rifle,
268
00:16:57,874 --> 00:17:02,010
I pulled the trigger,
and I shot that buffalo.
269
00:17:02,353 --> 00:17:04,054
You shot a buffalo?
270
00:17:04,985 --> 00:17:06,817
You were listening?
271
00:17:06,852 --> 00:17:10,768
That means I've got to come up
with an ending for this nonsense.
272
00:17:10,803 --> 00:17:12,408
Bart, what are you doing?
273
00:17:12,443 --> 00:17:14,690
Politely listening
to our grandfather.
274
00:17:15,994 --> 00:17:18,376
It was the war to end all wars,
275
00:17:18,411 --> 00:17:20,125
but Pepsi would not give up.
276
00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:22,913
They continued to challenge Coke.
277
00:17:24,036 --> 00:17:25,167
Okay, listen, you.
278
00:17:25,202 --> 00:17:28,695
I don't know who you are or what
you've done with the real Bart, but...
279
00:17:29,146 --> 00:17:31,635
God help me, I want him back.
280
00:17:31,670 --> 00:17:33,772
I don't know what you're talking about.
281
00:17:35,632 --> 00:17:38,088
Oh. The real Bart would have
thrown me out the window.
282
00:17:38,215 --> 00:17:39,673
He would have defenestrated you?
283
00:17:39,708 --> 00:17:41,967
You're just digging yourself even deeper.
284
00:17:44,439 --> 00:17:45,940
Come on, Bart.
You've got to get out of here.
285
00:17:45,975 --> 00:17:47,859
Pack like you've never
packed before.
286
00:17:47,894 --> 00:17:50,138
You know,
I have never packed before.
287
00:17:53,015 --> 00:17:55,230
- This is hard.
- So, you're packing.
288
00:17:55,265 --> 00:17:57,649
- You must have already heard.
- Heard what?
289
00:17:57,787 --> 00:18:00,402
- We're going to Aspen.
- On a little ski trip.
290
00:18:00,569 --> 00:18:02,107
Ski trip?
291
00:18:02,142 --> 00:18:05,289
You won't know how they'll
strike... a boating accident...
292
00:18:05,904 --> 00:18:07,034
...a ski trip.
293
00:18:08,171 --> 00:18:10,861
Scrubbing you
294
00:18:10,896 --> 00:18:14,683
Is easy 'cause you've been pre-rinsed
295
00:18:14,718 --> 00:18:18,086
And when you're covered, with goo
296
00:18:18,378 --> 00:18:21,882
That's when I'm scrubbing you.
297
00:18:21,917 --> 00:18:23,680
Scrub-bub-bub-bub-bub!
298
00:18:23,715 --> 00:18:25,482
Scrub-bub-bub-bub-bub...
299
00:18:25,517 --> 00:18:28,374
Mom, "Bart" has something to tell you.
300
00:18:29,175 --> 00:18:31,767
I don't like the look
of those air quotes.
301
00:18:31,802 --> 00:18:35,562
So now Bart is on his way to Aspen,
where they're going to try to kill him.
302
00:18:35,929 --> 00:18:39,274
Thank you, future Bart, for traveling back
through time to warn us.
303
00:18:49,055 --> 00:18:52,579
Boy, Aspen sure is ritzy.
Even the winos look better.
304
00:18:53,651 --> 00:18:55,343
Uh, we're champagnos.
305
00:18:55,378 --> 00:18:56,875
Who wants a mimosa?
306
00:18:58,975 --> 00:19:01,664
Uh... this trail is for
experienced skiers.
307
00:19:01,699 --> 00:19:03,974
Which is what you'll be
if you make it to the bottom.
308
00:19:04,009 --> 00:19:05,133
Which you won't.
309
00:19:07,739 --> 00:19:11,390
- Soon he'll be dead.
- And we'll split the inheritance.
310
00:19:11,643 --> 00:19:13,529
Yes, split.
311
00:19:13,564 --> 00:19:15,018
Potato?
312
00:19:17,912 --> 00:19:19,064
There's Bart!
313
00:19:19,199 --> 00:19:21,970
This looks like a job
for Captain Crazy.
314
00:19:22,005 --> 00:19:24,319
Up, up, and away!
315
00:19:24,469 --> 00:19:27,281
Oh, come on, gravity.
You used to be cool.
316
00:19:32,155 --> 00:19:33,155
Occupied.
317
00:19:47,748 --> 00:19:50,345
Two hot chocolates, please.
318
00:19:51,088 --> 00:19:53,382
- Are you guests at the lodge?
- No.
319
00:19:59,444 --> 00:20:01,565
You know, I feel sorry for you, kid.
320
00:20:01,600 --> 00:20:05,068
Going back to that cold,
loveless family.
321
00:20:05,552 --> 00:20:07,205
I'll survive.
322
00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:08,721
Your favorite, sir.
323
00:20:08,756 --> 00:20:13,285
Hot fudge sundae with
gold leaf and diamond flakes.
324
00:20:15,311 --> 00:20:17,748
Take me with you. I'll be anything
and everything you want.
325
00:20:17,783 --> 00:20:20,500
Don't leave me here with them!
326
00:20:21,043 --> 00:20:24,594
I never thought I'd say this,
but I missed you guys.
327
00:20:24,629 --> 00:20:26,196
Even, what's her name... Lisa.
328
00:20:29,163 --> 00:20:33,500
Now we tuck in the tummy,
the tushy, and the tootsies.
329
00:20:41,016 --> 00:20:42,731
This is the life.
330
00:20:42,766 --> 00:20:45,192
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