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Previously on 24...
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I mean The Simpsons:
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Behold...
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our new state-of-the-art weapon
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in the global war against misbehavior.
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CTU...
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the Counter Truancy Unit!
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I've got something!
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The sixth-grade security camera
shows three empty desks.
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Enhance!
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Skinner Stinks
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Dehance! Dehance!
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I ran the attendance protocols.
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Here are your three missing students:
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Hmm.
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Good work, Database.
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We helped.
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Whoa.
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This is the source
of the stench.
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Hey.
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Get your own yogurt.
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Vile curd.
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Simpson, you can take your putrid mess
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far out of my sight,
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you song-less land whale.
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Whoo-hoo!
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Business trip!
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Simpson!
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I'll teach you to make a Poupon "me."
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If someone did eat Bart's shorts,
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they'd have a tummy full of pocket garbage.
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The school's having a bake sale today?!
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At 3:00?!
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- Unemployed.
- I promised them a cake.
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I've only got 27 minutes.
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The pre-heat is on.
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The following takes place
between 2:34 p.m.
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and 3:04 p.m.
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Or maybe it's a.m.
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Whichever one is the morning one,
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it's not that one.
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Apu, I'm returning a yogurt
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I wasn't a hundred percent satisfied with.
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Mmm?
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Ooh. Oh my God!
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If a dead fish and a homeless
person had a baby,
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and the baby puked,
and a dog ate the puke,
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this smells like the rear end
of that dog!
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I'll give you any
yogurt in the store,
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just take that thing
with you when you go!
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Let's spit in the coffee pots.
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I call hazelnut.
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Truants moving into the Kwik-E-Mart.
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I've got a visual.
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Ugh!
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That yogurt is toxic.
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It's just what
we've been looking for.
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Now this crossword's nothin' but swears.
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We've got what we need.
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Milhouse, bring them in.
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Roger that.
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And Lisa, if I don't make it back,
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there's a letter in my locker
I want you to read.
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I already read it.
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We've all read it.
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Wait, Milhouse,
hold your position.
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Something doesn't add up.
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Look what the bullies
could have stolen...
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Big Chief Rotten Cheeks
Chewing Tobacco...
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a take-a-penny tray
with a quarter in it.
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So why steal the yogurt?
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We have to find out
what they're up to.
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Hmm...
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Milhouse, change of plan
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observe and follow.
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Permission to buy
a Hostess fruit pie
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to keep my strength up?
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Denied.
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Hey Milhouse, who are
you spying on?
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Those bullies?
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Huh?
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What about the fat guy?
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Hey, lay off.
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You're the fat one
of you guys!
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I'm bulking up
for football!
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I'm still alive.
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You call that playing to win?
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Mr. Simpson, I'm scared.
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This is our life now, Milhouse.
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We're Dumpster folk.
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I've lost Milhouse.
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He'll be somewhat missed.
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Who do we send now?
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Principal Skinner,
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you know we have only one agent
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who stands a chance
with those bullies.
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My brother.
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Lord, give me guidance.
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That's right, the Guidance
Department
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Detention Room.
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Thank you, Mrs. Lord.
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Hmm?
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All out?
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I can't make my famous raisin
sponge-cake without raisins.
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Kids love the zing of raisins!
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If I help you, I want full
immunity for
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all pranks past and future,
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and you have to teach
me a swear word
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I don't already know.
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No deal.
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Okay, suit yourself.
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It's not like you have any
major events coming up
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that the bullies would
want to disrupt.
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The bake sale!
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Principal Skinner,
as we both know,
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but you might need reminding,
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the annual bake sale provides
90%
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of the school's funding.
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Okay, you have a deal,
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you conniving little...
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Wow, that's a swear?
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Used as a noun it is.
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Sweet!
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Now I'm going to need
some wheels.
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Yes, of course.
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I think we can wrangle you
a used bicycle.
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Do you prefer Schwinn or Huffy?
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Bart? Where did he...?
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My car keys!
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Road kill, burnt hair,
my sister's retainer case,
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six weeks of bottled farts,
possum placenta,
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sweat from a walk-around Goofy suit.
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And finally, T.C.B.Y.
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that container of botulized yogurt.
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Okay, everyone, masks on.
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Gentlemen, we've created
the mother of all stink bombs.
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Most satisfactory.
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Jimbo, sweetie, I have
to run to the bank.
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Are you boys going
to be okay alone?
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Put a top on, Mom!
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Everyone's seen your implants.
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But the doctor said
the air will help them...
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Just go!
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Lookin' good, Carol!
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I saw it first!
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You are such a liar!
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You give that to me!
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Must... escape.
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Springfield Elementary is about
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to be Stinkfield Elementary.
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Lisa, they're going to put a
stink bomb in the school.
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I might be able to stop them,
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but I'll need a schematic of Jimbo's house.
154
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Jimbo drew a couple of pictures
of his house in second grade,
155
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but I can't vouch for their accuracy.
156
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The teacher gave him a frowny-face.
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I'm so proud of us.
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You got Jimbo.
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They're on to you, Jimbo!
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Get out of there!
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Scram... boiled eggs would be lovely
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for breakfast, Mother.
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Just go! Quickly!
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We're busted!
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Thanks, mole.
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Now make your split-screen vanish.
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Will do!
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Ooh!
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00:09:39,719 --> 00:09:41,752
Damn it, these blue prints are all wrong.
170
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Where's the roller coaster room
and the shark tank?
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Ooh.
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Huh?
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Son of a beach ball, they're gone!
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I've got a man down!
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Well, not a man.
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A very special boy.
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Chloe, I need those schematics now!
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What? Who is this?
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I'm Jack Bauer.
180
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Who the hell are you?
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Me? Uh, I'm...
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Ahmed Adoody.
183
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Chloe,
find out all you can about Ahmed Adoody.
184
00:10:24,635 --> 00:10:26,775
Does anyone there know Ahmed Adoody?
185
00:10:26,782 --> 00:10:28,985
Ahmed Adoody, wealthy Saudi financier.
186
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Disappeared into
Afghanistan in the late 90s.
187
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Really?
188
00:10:31,732 --> 00:10:33,202
No, Jack, it's a joke name.
189
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You're being set up.
190
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Damn it!
191
00:10:41,367 --> 00:10:42,216
Now, let's see.
192
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20 minutes at 300 degrees is
the equivalent of
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five minutes at...
194
00:10:46,709 --> 00:10:47,971
Let's see...
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1,200 degrees.
196
00:10:51,087 --> 00:10:51,565
Now...
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00:10:51,567 --> 00:10:53,409
to make the folded index card
198
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that goes in front of the cake.
199
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D'oh!
200
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No!
201
00:11:12,780 --> 00:11:16,803
Oh. Pink frosting fixes everything.
202
00:11:20,129 --> 00:11:23,088
Say,
is your butt numb from all this vibrating?
203
00:11:23,091 --> 00:11:24,130
Oh, mine is.
204
00:11:24,134 --> 00:11:26,431
Still,
I wouldn't describe it as unpleasant.
205
00:11:26,434 --> 00:11:28,206
Well, let's get some shut-eye.
206
00:11:30,431 --> 00:11:32,473
Ooh, it's that bar I like!
207
00:11:32,480 --> 00:11:33,708
Wait here in the car.
208
00:11:33,713 --> 00:11:34,822
Ow!
209
00:11:38,201 --> 00:11:40,476
Okay, this might hurt a little.
210
00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:41,540
No problem.
211
00:11:43,453 --> 00:11:45,938
Oh, sweet mother of Mary!
212
00:11:49,777 --> 00:11:51,688
Okay, Milhouse, what do you want to do?
213
00:11:51,692 --> 00:11:53,876
Well, the school's having a bake sale.
214
00:11:53,882 --> 00:11:56,295
Old Betsy'll get us there.
215
00:12:01,563 --> 00:12:04,217
We are projecting an effective stink radius
216
00:12:04,253 --> 00:12:06,767
farther than any of us can kick a kickball.
217
00:12:06,774 --> 00:12:09,870
Sir,
we have to call off this bake sale now!
218
00:12:09,875 --> 00:12:12,159
Yes, yes, yes, we have to do something.
219
00:12:12,164 --> 00:12:13,565
Although,
220
00:12:13,569 --> 00:12:16,765
the basketball hoops have been retracted.
221
00:12:16,771 --> 00:12:19,407
D.J. Fun-times has
already cashed his deposit,
222
00:12:19,411 --> 00:12:21,335
and Superintendent Chalmers
won't be happy to hear...
223
00:12:21,341 --> 00:12:23,301
I won't be happy to hear what, Seymour?
224
00:12:23,316 --> 00:12:25,934
Um, that, uh, bake sale revenue projections
225
00:12:25,939 --> 00:12:27,237
are through the roof!
226
00:12:27,243 --> 00:12:29,425
I'm very happy to hear that.
227
00:12:29,430 --> 00:12:31,061
You don't know me at all.
228
00:12:32,132 --> 00:12:35,107
We have to find those bullies
before the bake sale starts.
229
00:12:35,112 --> 00:12:38,540
Martin, run a top-down search
on the school security grid.
230
00:12:38,545 --> 00:12:41,544
Will do, and you chose the perfect person.
231
00:12:49,119 --> 00:12:50,419
The stink bomb!
232
00:12:50,423 --> 00:12:52,394
I can't let anyone see it!
233
00:12:52,400 --> 00:12:53,710
Martin, anything?
234
00:12:53,828 --> 00:12:54,793
I wish.
235
00:12:54,799 --> 00:12:57,787
This is as boring as mainstream cinema.
236
00:12:59,177 --> 00:13:00,365
So true.
237
00:13:18,764 --> 00:13:20,636
Cops. Act natural.
238
00:13:23,241 --> 00:13:25,335
Hello, Officer!
239
00:13:25,340 --> 00:13:26,892
Oh, afternoon, ma'am.
240
00:13:27,456 --> 00:13:29,991
What is it about a woman in a Dumpster?
241
00:13:45,077 --> 00:13:46,046
Wait!
242
00:13:47,397 --> 00:13:49,239
Mr. Simpson!
243
00:13:56,281 --> 00:13:57,843
My cake!
244
00:14:14,098 --> 00:14:17,870
They're gonna wish the bake
sale was a nose plug sale.
245
00:14:17,874 --> 00:14:20,127
And it totally isn't.
246
00:14:22,983 --> 00:14:23,891
Teens?
247
00:14:23,899 --> 00:14:25,518
In Willie's hidey hole?
248
00:14:25,526 --> 00:14:28,652
I'll mop up your blood from the inside!
249
00:14:37,652 --> 00:14:40,034
We have a fire alarm
in the ventilation room!
250
00:14:40,052 --> 00:14:41,090
I'll check it out.
251
00:14:48,042 --> 00:14:50,325
Skip, skip, skip to my Lou...
252
00:14:50,332 --> 00:14:51,599
Top of the morning, Nelson.
253
00:14:51,604 --> 00:14:52,777
And to you, Martin.
254
00:14:52,779 --> 00:14:55,156
Skip to my Lou, my darling.
255
00:14:55,272 --> 00:14:57,051
Hey, Nelson, what gives?
256
00:14:57,058 --> 00:14:59,662
Martin just skipped past
you singing "Skip to my Lou",
257
00:14:59,669 --> 00:15:01,519
and you did nothing.
258
00:15:01,525 --> 00:15:03,859
Can't a guy enjoy a catchy tune?
259
00:15:06,392 --> 00:15:07,613
Ow! Ow!
260
00:15:07,630 --> 00:15:09,881
I'm unclear on what you want!
261
00:15:12,325 --> 00:15:13,920
Is Martin working for Jimbo?
262
00:15:14,557 --> 00:15:15,354
Uh...
263
00:15:16,784 --> 00:15:17,681
Ow!
264
00:15:18,603 --> 00:15:19,782
Yes.
265
00:15:19,787 --> 00:15:20,876
Yes what?
266
00:15:21,252 --> 00:15:22,059
Ow!
267
00:15:23,088 --> 00:15:24,180
Yes, sir.
268
00:15:26,283 --> 00:15:27,903
Lisa, are you on a secure line?
269
00:15:27,908 --> 00:15:28,707
I am.
270
00:15:28,710 --> 00:15:30,111
You're on a Bluetooth cell phone,
271
00:15:30,115 --> 00:15:32,402
the most vulnerable device known to man.
272
00:15:32,414 --> 00:15:33,888
But it looks so cool.
273
00:15:33,890 --> 00:15:35,692
Listen, there's a mole inside CTU.
274
00:15:35,699 --> 00:15:36,718
A mole?!
275
00:15:36,721 --> 00:15:37,719
Yes, a mole.
276
00:15:37,728 --> 00:15:38,855
Now, I don't have much time,
277
00:15:38,860 --> 00:15:40,864
so I'm just gonna come
right out and say his name,
278
00:15:40,870 --> 00:15:42,127
so get ready to know his name.
279
00:15:42,135 --> 00:15:43,915
His name is the following: M...
280
00:15:47,425 --> 00:15:48,803
Skip, skip,
281
00:15:48,811 --> 00:15:50,469
skip to my Lou.
282
00:15:54,111 --> 00:15:55,713
Rice Krispie Treats?!
283
00:15:55,726 --> 00:15:58,012
Way to phone it in, Sarah Wiggum.
284
00:15:58,015 --> 00:16:00,220
Excuse me, excuse me, I'm in the sale.
285
00:16:00,235 --> 00:16:01,595
I'm in the sale.
286
00:16:03,305 --> 00:16:05,500
Okay, I kept my end of the deal.
287
00:16:05,505 --> 00:16:07,538
Release my friends.
288
00:16:10,573 --> 00:16:13,501
All here, from Asimov to Zarathustra.
289
00:16:14,441 --> 00:16:15,721
Where's Phobos?!
290
00:16:15,726 --> 00:16:17,446
He's with us now.
291
00:16:19,939 --> 00:16:20,965
We're out of here.
292
00:16:20,965 --> 00:16:22,125
Smell you later.
293
00:16:22,129 --> 00:16:24,844
Three minutes later, to be exact.
294
00:16:28,436 --> 00:16:30,656
What have I done?
295
00:16:54,869 --> 00:16:55,937
Raisin cake.
296
00:16:55,942 --> 00:16:57,521
Who wants raisin cake?
297
00:16:57,527 --> 00:16:59,831
Don't worry, it's not too moist.
298
00:17:00,427 --> 00:17:00,965
Hmm?
299
00:17:05,208 --> 00:17:06,660
Can I have some more money?
300
00:17:06,665 --> 00:17:08,454
I gave you ten dollars.
301
00:17:08,539 --> 00:17:10,945
All the other moms gave
their husbands twenty.
302
00:17:10,951 --> 00:17:12,493
Well, all the other husbands
303
00:17:12,498 --> 00:17:14,571
don't come home dirty from fighting.
304
00:17:14,575 --> 00:17:15,384
I had to fight.
305
00:17:15,389 --> 00:17:17,430
Lenny said his dad is Hulk Hogan,
306
00:17:17,436 --> 00:17:19,047
and I know he's not.
307
00:17:19,052 --> 00:17:21,276
Here's five more dollars.
308
00:17:24,060 --> 00:17:25,622
Bart, are you all right?
309
00:17:25,646 --> 00:17:26,454
Bart?!
310
00:17:26,462 --> 00:17:27,863
Hey, I'm fine.
They haven't made
311
00:17:27,866 --> 00:17:29,286
a French horn yet that can hurt me.
312
00:17:29,290 --> 00:17:31,373
Now, I'm sending you a picture of the bomb.
313
00:17:35,315 --> 00:17:36,476
My God.
314
00:17:36,479 --> 00:17:39,064
That's a class-fives tench-dispersal unit.
315
00:17:39,069 --> 00:17:41,041
We have to short-out that fan.
316
00:17:45,576 --> 00:17:47,297
"H.D.W."
What's that?
317
00:17:47,303 --> 00:17:49,658
That's the main valve of the hot dog water
318
00:17:49,661 --> 00:17:51,281
recirculation system.
319
00:17:51,289 --> 00:17:54,836
There's over 30 years of
wiener soakings in there.
320
00:17:54,840 --> 00:17:56,622
Lis, you have to release that water.
321
00:17:56,629 --> 00:17:58,439
It's the only way to short out the fan.
322
00:17:58,447 --> 00:18:00,259
But you and Willie will drown.
323
00:18:00,264 --> 00:18:01,573
Possibly, but I can't risk
324
00:18:01,579 --> 00:18:03,118
Superintendent Chalmers
finding out about...
325
00:18:03,165 --> 00:18:04,494
Finding out about what, Seymour?
326
00:18:04,829 --> 00:18:07,424
Um, about how early press coverage of
327
00:18:07,429 --> 00:18:09,303
the bake sale is uniformly positive.
328
00:18:09,308 --> 00:18:12,666
Once again,
you have thoroughly mis-gauged my response.
329
00:18:12,670 --> 00:18:15,117
This is going on your permanent record.
330
00:18:24,025 --> 00:18:26,681
The hot dog water's going
to push us into the fan!
331
00:18:28,351 --> 00:18:30,746
And I just sharpened those blades.
332
00:18:50,278 --> 00:18:55,452
Skip to my Lou... my darling.
333
00:18:56,463 --> 00:18:58,205
Bart, I've got an idea.
334
00:18:58,210 --> 00:18:59,266
As you're dying,
335
00:18:59,274 --> 00:19:01,528
jam the blades with your spine.
336
00:19:01,531 --> 00:19:03,405
Keep pitching. I'll be back.
337
00:19:13,760 --> 00:19:14,848
Look!
338
00:19:14,852 --> 00:19:18,172
A window to a child's watery grave!
339
00:19:18,177 --> 00:19:20,078
Don't worry, I'll free the boy.
340
00:19:26,318 --> 00:19:27,939
Damn it! This glass is bulletproof.
341
00:19:27,943 --> 00:19:29,537
There's nothing that can shatter it.
342
00:19:29,543 --> 00:19:32,004
Yes, there is!
343
00:19:41,256 --> 00:19:42,033
Huh?
344
00:19:43,685 --> 00:19:44,754
Ooh, a thermos.
345
00:19:44,761 --> 00:19:46,935
With seven cups of coffee still in it.
346
00:19:46,938 --> 00:19:47,868
Oh, wait, six.
347
00:19:47,874 --> 00:19:49,546
Dad, that's a bomb!
348
00:19:49,548 --> 00:19:51,129
Here! It's yours!
349
00:19:53,908 --> 00:19:55,458
How do I stop it?
350
00:19:56,408 --> 00:19:58,069
Oh, that's convenient.
351
00:20:00,302 --> 00:20:02,835
Thank goodness this crisis was averted.
352
00:20:02,850 --> 00:20:04,110
Nicely done, Lisa.
353
00:20:04,115 --> 00:20:05,737
Hey, what about me?
354
00:20:05,742 --> 00:20:07,795
I almost died, and so did Willie.
355
00:20:09,204 --> 00:20:10,455
Oh, leave me be.
356
00:20:10,459 --> 00:20:13,931
I don't want to live if I
have to clean up this mess.
357
00:20:21,355 --> 00:20:23,646
Oh, my special little guy.
358
00:20:23,654 --> 00:20:25,937
I'm so glad you're okay.
359
00:20:26,735 --> 00:20:29,823
Oh, I'm just glad you taste like hot dogs.
360
00:20:36,513 --> 00:20:37,734
Good work, Lisa!
361
00:20:37,739 --> 00:20:38,937
What about me?
362
00:20:38,942 --> 00:20:40,412
Bart Simpson, 12 minutes ago,
363
00:20:40,416 --> 00:20:42,462
you made an annoying
prank phone call to me.
364
00:20:42,465 --> 00:20:43,917
All units, move in.
365
00:20:52,185 --> 00:20:54,740
I pulled every single field
agent off all other cases
366
00:20:54,742 --> 00:20:56,718
to track you down and bring you to justice.
367
00:20:56,721 --> 00:20:58,171
It was a tough decision,
368
00:20:58,179 --> 00:21:00,031
but I think I made the right call.
369
00:21:04,390 --> 00:21:06,295
It's okay, that was Shelbyville.