1 00:00:25,424 --> 00:00:28,421 Mom! Bart's drinking coffee! 2 00:00:28,422 --> 00:00:30,561 It's not coffee, it's hot Pepsi. 3 00:00:30,604 --> 00:00:32,830 You're the worst husband in the world! 4 00:00:32,831 --> 00:00:36,075 Yeah, well, I wish I'd married Patty and Selma. 5 00:00:36,076 --> 00:00:38,860 I wish I'd married Lenny and his friend. 6 00:00:39,062 --> 00:00:41,678 Man, Mom and Dad are really going at it. 7 00:00:42,051 --> 00:00:43,991 I hope everything's okay. 8 00:00:43,992 --> 00:00:46,245 Don't you spit sunflower seeds at me. 9 00:00:46,331 --> 00:00:47,707 You used to love it! 10 00:00:50,529 --> 00:00:53,675 Recording that fake fight was a great idea. 11 00:00:53,676 --> 00:00:56,913 Now the kids won't bother us during our morning snuggle. 12 00:00:58,247 --> 00:01:03,083 Dear Lord, thank you for the physical intimacy we are about to enjoy. 13 00:01:03,088 --> 00:01:05,993 And as always, have fun watching. 14 00:01:06,198 --> 00:01:08,910 Go... lovemaking! 15 00:01:09,948 --> 00:01:12,653 And I hate the cutesy way you make jack-o'-lanterns! 16 00:01:12,659 --> 00:01:16,224 I like scary Halloween, not funny Halloween! 17 00:01:17,872 --> 00:01:22,421 ♪ I been through the desert ♪ ♪ on a horse with no name ♪ 18 00:01:22,426 --> 00:01:25,519 ♪ It felt good to be out of the rain ♪ 19 00:01:26,216 --> 00:01:28,038 County fair music? 20 00:01:30,307 --> 00:01:31,987 Whoo, whoo. 21 00:01:35,102 --> 00:01:37,104 Milhouse, steady my Duds. 22 00:01:37,479 --> 00:01:38,819 Trust me, Bart. 23 00:01:38,823 --> 00:01:42,811 It's better to walk in on both your parents than on just one of 'em. 24 00:01:42,816 --> 00:01:45,347 Hey, dinks, give me your lunch money! 25 00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:49,051 But what will I eat at midday? 26 00:01:49,053 --> 00:01:50,572 I can't solve all your problems. 27 00:01:50,579 --> 00:01:52,036 Just hand over the money. 28 00:01:53,689 --> 00:01:56,291 Thanks, wads, and I hope to see you both Saturday. 29 00:01:56,425 --> 00:01:57,323 Huh? 30 00:01:57,899 --> 00:01:59,439 Come to my party or die. 31 00:01:59,955 --> 00:02:01,637 Come to my party or die. 32 00:02:01,641 --> 00:02:03,884 I hate Nelson's parties. 33 00:02:03,887 --> 00:02:07,013 He makes you look at his baseball cards and tell him they're good. 34 00:02:07,027 --> 00:02:08,839 They're not good. 35 00:02:08,843 --> 00:02:10,011 I don't like him. 36 00:02:10,014 --> 00:02:12,469 I'll bet Nelson won't even have gift bags. 37 00:02:13,798 --> 00:02:14,801 Is that legal? 38 00:02:14,869 --> 00:02:19,259 Wait! What if nobody goes? He can't kill all of us. 39 00:02:19,363 --> 00:02:23,469 He's right. Individually, we are weak like a single twig. 40 00:02:23,546 --> 00:02:27,451 But as a bundle, we form a mighty faggot. 41 00:02:30,063 --> 00:02:31,375 Well said. 42 00:02:31,468 --> 00:02:33,830 If we all stand together, Nelson's helpless. 43 00:02:33,895 --> 00:02:35,807 Hell, no, we won't show. 44 00:02:35,810 --> 00:02:37,901 Hell, no, we won't show! 45 00:02:37,909 --> 00:02:39,919 Hell, no, we won't show! 46 00:02:39,922 --> 00:02:41,896 Hell, no, I won't mow! 47 00:02:41,899 --> 00:02:44,583 Willy, you're fired with complete loss of pension. 48 00:02:44,586 --> 00:02:45,333 Damn it! 49 00:02:45,809 --> 00:02:49,467 You actually convinced people not to go to Nelson's party? 50 00:02:49,470 --> 00:02:51,682 Yep, he'll be all alone on his birthday. 51 00:02:51,698 --> 00:02:53,410 Oh, I wish I could see it. 52 00:02:53,413 --> 00:02:56,366 Boo-hoo, I'm Nelson. No one likes me. 53 00:02:56,372 --> 00:03:00,329 Bartholomew J. Simpson, how can you be so mean?! 54 00:03:00,333 --> 00:03:01,698 What are you going to do about it? 55 00:03:03,110 --> 00:03:03,849 Hey! 56 00:03:03,864 --> 00:03:05,806 I'll whack you with the whole salad set 57 00:03:05,819 --> 00:03:08,001 if you don't start thinking about others. 58 00:03:08,007 --> 00:03:09,768 You are going to that party. 59 00:03:09,872 --> 00:03:11,492 Mom, I can't go! 60 00:03:11,497 --> 00:03:12,693 No one else is. 61 00:03:12,699 --> 00:03:14,501 Well, if no one else jumped off 62 00:03:14,504 --> 00:03:17,598 the Empire State Building, would you not jump? 63 00:03:20,153 --> 00:03:21,400 Kind of... 64 00:03:21,487 --> 00:03:22,986 Aw, come on, Bart. 65 00:03:22,991 --> 00:03:24,902 The party will be fun. 66 00:03:24,915 --> 00:03:26,425 Nelson's not bad. 67 00:03:26,439 --> 00:03:29,474 All he needs is a little kindness. 68 00:03:31,306 --> 00:03:34,608 Lisa, you're never gonna get a husband by being sarcastic. 69 00:03:34,886 --> 00:03:36,334 All right, no husband. 70 00:03:36,340 --> 00:03:37,840 You're getting a husband! 71 00:03:37,844 --> 00:03:39,914 And you are going to that party. 72 00:03:43,309 --> 00:03:44,830 Dad, don't make me go. 73 00:03:44,835 --> 00:03:45,873 I'll give you a back rub. 74 00:03:49,590 --> 00:03:54,026 Oh, your elbow's like an angel's kiss, but you still have to go. 75 00:03:54,033 --> 00:03:54,759 Why? 76 00:03:54,963 --> 00:03:58,882 Son, we all have to do things we don't want to: 77 00:03:58,897 --> 00:04:02,832 like have jobs and families and responsibilities 78 00:04:02,848 --> 00:04:04,779 and having to be Mr. Funny all the time. 79 00:04:04,781 --> 00:04:07,326 You think I wouldn't rather be living nude in the forest 80 00:04:07,330 --> 00:04:10,605 like some ancient pagan, just dancing around 81 00:04:10,612 --> 00:04:12,372 playing the pan flute?! 82 00:04:12,385 --> 00:04:14,145 And here we are. 83 00:04:17,461 --> 00:04:20,786 Okay, just walk in, say "happy birthday" and get out. 84 00:04:21,973 --> 00:04:23,583 Whoa! 85 00:04:24,733 --> 00:04:26,343 This party doesn't suck. 86 00:04:26,548 --> 00:04:28,396 Pizza, that's a nice touch. 87 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:33,594 Uh-oh, do I hear a dial tone? 88 00:04:33,597 --> 00:04:35,680 'Cause this party is off the hook! 89 00:04:37,959 --> 00:04:38,900 What up, B? 90 00:04:40,640 --> 00:04:43,159 Um, happy birthday, Nelson. 91 00:04:44,097 --> 00:04:46,611 Uh, I know it seems a little quiet. 92 00:04:46,616 --> 00:04:50,150 Must be a lot of traffic today. Is Highway 88 backed up? 93 00:04:50,176 --> 00:04:52,236 Oh, yeah, it's a parking lot out there. 94 00:04:52,244 --> 00:04:54,716 Of course, that explains everything. 95 00:04:54,720 --> 00:04:56,127 Stupid Highway 88! 96 00:04:56,186 --> 00:04:58,083 Huh? 97 00:05:03,778 --> 00:05:06,190 Hi, kids, my spidey sense is tingling. 98 00:05:06,192 --> 00:05:09,327 Tingling because it's a certain someone's birthday. 99 00:05:10,706 --> 00:05:11,624 Yeah! 100 00:05:14,227 --> 00:05:16,790 - Uh, where are all the kids? - They're coming! 101 00:05:16,794 --> 00:05:17,522 They are! 102 00:05:18,469 --> 00:05:20,031 I love you, Spidey! 103 00:05:20,126 --> 00:05:22,918 Uh, listen, I only got ten minutes of material. 104 00:05:22,921 --> 00:05:25,013 Maybe I should come back a little later. 105 00:05:25,057 --> 00:05:25,866 Don't go. 106 00:05:25,882 --> 00:05:28,565 My party peeps are en route, I swear! 107 00:05:32,100 --> 00:05:33,339 Nelson, nobody's coming. 108 00:05:33,854 --> 00:05:35,837 But how could nobody come? 109 00:05:35,901 --> 00:05:37,409 I ordered them to. 110 00:05:37,417 --> 00:05:39,207 Well, that's the thing. 111 00:05:39,351 --> 00:05:42,735 Sometimes you can be kind of a jerk. 112 00:05:42,813 --> 00:05:47,799 True... but I thought I had some friends. 113 00:05:48,357 --> 00:05:51,171 Maybe you can have fun with just me. 114 00:05:51,246 --> 00:05:52,104 Okay. 115 00:05:52,478 --> 00:05:53,248 Why not? 116 00:05:53,253 --> 00:05:55,455 Stop having fun, kids. 117 00:05:55,457 --> 00:05:58,912 I'm Dr. Octopus from Marvel Comics' Spiderman. 118 00:05:58,917 --> 00:06:03,197 I'm inventing a ray that turns birthday presents into homework. 119 00:06:03,199 --> 00:06:04,498 Yah! 120 00:06:04,513 --> 00:06:05,170 Come on, Bart. 121 00:06:05,214 --> 00:06:06,435 Let's knock him down. 122 00:06:17,881 --> 00:06:19,370 Wait, I have an idea. 123 00:06:26,213 --> 00:06:29,070 Look at our kids, playing like champs. 124 00:06:29,077 --> 00:06:31,618 Yeah. How'd you afford this kick-ass party? 125 00:06:31,623 --> 00:06:34,077 Carnival ride hit me on the head. 126 00:06:34,412 --> 00:06:35,209 Hmm... 127 00:06:35,377 --> 00:06:38,681 So how was Nelson's party? 128 00:06:38,725 --> 00:06:39,534 Not bad. 129 00:06:39,547 --> 00:06:43,175 We had pizza, cake and then sang songs with Nelson's grandma. 130 00:06:43,177 --> 00:06:47,377 But it was a one-time thing, and now I'll never see him again. 131 00:06:48,496 --> 00:06:51,166 Hey! It's my birthday bud! 132 00:06:53,457 --> 00:06:56,290 Yeah, yeah, it was, uh, super fun. 133 00:06:56,296 --> 00:06:57,215 Good times. 134 00:06:57,218 --> 00:07:00,075 Hey, Ralph, have I got half a sandwich for you. 135 00:07:00,270 --> 00:07:01,768 Bart, where you going? 136 00:07:01,782 --> 00:07:04,828 I saved you a seat, best friend. 137 00:07:06,407 --> 00:07:07,744 Ha-ha! 138 00:07:10,126 --> 00:07:12,839 Hey, best friend, I got you a present. 139 00:07:12,856 --> 00:07:15,248 An entire case of pool cue chalk. 140 00:07:15,444 --> 00:07:16,421 Huh? Huh? 141 00:07:16,657 --> 00:07:19,331 We can make the tip of anything blue. 142 00:07:19,333 --> 00:07:23,993 Um, Nelson, I was just thinking about us being best friends. 143 00:07:23,999 --> 00:07:25,949 Whoa! Me, too! 144 00:07:25,953 --> 00:07:27,986 We are so connected! 145 00:07:28,171 --> 00:07:29,259 Look, um, 146 00:07:29,333 --> 00:07:32,629 I don't have time for new friends. 147 00:07:32,692 --> 00:07:34,031 I got a lot on my plate. 148 00:07:34,037 --> 00:07:36,861 I've got a big report due on the Nile River topic sentence, 149 00:07:36,868 --> 00:07:39,398 bibliography, page numbers... it's nuts. 150 00:07:40,247 --> 00:07:41,313 Dude... 151 00:07:41,421 --> 00:07:44,345 You made me get water on my cheek. 152 00:07:49,101 --> 00:07:51,021 Bart is my best friend now, 153 00:07:51,029 --> 00:07:54,171 which means no one picks on him ever again. 154 00:07:55,722 --> 00:07:57,051 Okay! Okay! 155 00:07:57,054 --> 00:07:59,386 I forgot how cool Bart was. 156 00:07:59,815 --> 00:08:00,730 Yeah, he's awesome. 157 00:08:00,736 --> 00:08:01,714 Good guy, good guy. 158 00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:02,356 Isn't he? 159 00:08:02,390 --> 00:08:05,113 I've known him for years, but I ran into him at a party 160 00:08:05,119 --> 00:08:06,440 and we really clicked. 161 00:08:06,453 --> 00:08:08,415 That's right, we're best friends now. 162 00:08:08,418 --> 00:08:12,494 So why don't you go pick on someone smaller and weaker? 163 00:08:12,502 --> 00:08:13,528 Good idea! 164 00:08:13,532 --> 00:08:16,930 Let's go over to the Sunshine pre-school and wail on toddlers. 165 00:08:16,934 --> 00:08:19,134 Yeah, we'll jump 'em while they're napping. 166 00:08:21,118 --> 00:08:22,056 Homie... 167 00:08:23,213 --> 00:08:23,714 Huh...? 168 00:08:25,768 --> 00:08:28,593 When you're done putting Lisa to bed we can, uh... 169 00:08:28,697 --> 00:08:31,363 finish what we started the other day. 170 00:08:31,367 --> 00:08:32,032 Woo-hoo! 171 00:08:32,038 --> 00:08:33,436 Marital sex! 172 00:08:34,427 --> 00:08:36,788 Okay, tucked in tight, glass of water, 173 00:08:36,793 --> 00:08:38,534 nightlight on, no barn owls, 174 00:08:38,549 --> 00:08:40,187 don't do drugs, love you, good night. 175 00:08:40,823 --> 00:08:43,396 Dad, can't you read me a story for a little bit? 176 00:08:43,401 --> 00:08:46,267 But your mother smells like coconut. 177 00:08:48,618 --> 00:08:51,038 Okay, sweetie, which book should I read? 178 00:08:51,263 --> 00:08:54,448 Angelica Button and the Dragon King's Trundle Bed. 179 00:08:54,453 --> 00:08:57,167 It's the ninth book in the Angelica Button series. 180 00:08:57,183 --> 00:09:00,226 Oh, yeah, this is that fantasy book that even grown-ups like. 181 00:09:00,272 --> 00:09:02,163 Broken, lonely grown-ups. 182 00:09:02,628 --> 00:09:06,203 "Chapter One: The Ruby Stone in the Door-Portal". 183 00:09:06,518 --> 00:09:07,397 Are you asleep yet? 184 00:09:07,434 --> 00:09:08,181 No. 185 00:09:09,989 --> 00:09:14,828 "Angelica trembled as she looked up at the stern but wise whiskers 186 00:09:14,834 --> 00:09:16,904 of Headmaster Greystash..." 187 00:09:18,316 --> 00:09:21,236 Angelica Button, you are a mere Earthkin. 188 00:09:21,241 --> 00:09:24,737 What business have you with the Merlinical Council? 189 00:09:24,742 --> 00:09:26,023 I bring warning! 190 00:09:26,026 --> 00:09:28,308 The Minister of Niceness, Lord Evilton, 191 00:09:28,313 --> 00:09:30,605 is not what he appears! 192 00:09:30,891 --> 00:09:33,544 Preposterous-sss! 193 00:09:33,549 --> 00:09:35,288 Foolish Earthkin! 194 00:09:35,293 --> 00:09:38,587 Send her to the sorrow mines of Mount Purgatorium. 195 00:09:39,124 --> 00:09:42,058 Nooo!! 196 00:09:42,253 --> 00:09:43,333 Lisa, wake up. 197 00:09:43,407 --> 00:09:45,559 They're taking Angelica to Mount Purgatorium. 198 00:09:45,966 --> 00:09:48,378 Oh, Dad, I'm tired. 199 00:09:48,441 --> 00:09:50,626 - We read more tomorrow. - Tomorrow? 200 00:09:50,831 --> 00:09:52,080 But she's in trouble now. 201 00:09:52,132 --> 00:09:53,934 I'll just read ahead without you. 202 00:09:54,041 --> 00:09:57,272 No! We have to read it together. 203 00:09:57,330 --> 00:10:00,054 Oh, of course. Whatever you say, sweetie. 204 00:10:00,068 --> 00:10:01,255 Nighty-night. 205 00:10:13,246 --> 00:10:16,499 I like to come up here and make fun of the sunset. 206 00:10:16,707 --> 00:10:19,159 Hey, gas ball, you suck! 207 00:10:19,865 --> 00:10:22,167 Nelson, do you ever wish you weren't a bully? 208 00:10:22,473 --> 00:10:24,072 Mm, sometimes. 209 00:10:24,127 --> 00:10:26,932 But it's not up to me, it's who I am. 210 00:10:26,987 --> 00:10:30,543 I mean, a shark can't stop swimming or it'll blow up. 211 00:10:30,846 --> 00:10:33,853 Man... I never knew you were so deep. 212 00:10:33,855 --> 00:10:36,208 Here, this is for you. 213 00:10:37,415 --> 00:10:38,915 A Nelson vest! 214 00:10:39,020 --> 00:10:41,947 The sleeves were torn off by wild dogs. 215 00:10:42,253 --> 00:10:44,614 From then on, my life changed. 216 00:10:45,141 --> 00:10:48,345 ♪ He's a rebel and he'll ♪ ♪ ever, ever be any good... ♪ 217 00:10:48,350 --> 00:10:51,475 All of a sudden, I was a somebody in a school full of nobodies. 218 00:10:51,580 --> 00:10:53,601 I could go anywhere, do anything. 219 00:10:53,706 --> 00:10:57,843 For us, to live any other way was nuts. 220 00:10:57,847 --> 00:11:01,261 ♪ That's no reason why I can't ♪ ♪ give him all my love ♪ 221 00:11:01,306 --> 00:11:05,095 ♪ He's always good to me, ♪ ♪ always treats me tenderly ♪ 222 00:11:05,149 --> 00:11:06,920 ♪ 'Cause he's no rebel, ♪ ♪ no, no, no ♪ 223 00:11:07,425 --> 00:11:11,029 ♪ He' rebel, no, no, no, to me... ♪ 224 00:11:29,319 --> 00:11:32,736 So, Scoty, how do you like school? 225 00:11:32,838 --> 00:11:33,737 Closed! 226 00:11:36,421 --> 00:11:38,682 Life was perfect. 227 00:11:39,401 --> 00:11:42,292 Lisa, I'm home. Time for me to read to you! 228 00:11:42,396 --> 00:11:44,360 Lisa's sleeping over at Janey's. 229 00:11:44,566 --> 00:11:48,021 Apparently, her mom makes good mac and cheese. 230 00:11:49,678 --> 00:11:53,035 Homer? Homer. 231 00:11:53,793 --> 00:11:56,245 You must read ahead. Fiction is your passion! 232 00:11:56,247 --> 00:11:59,122 Lady, you're nice, but I'm married. 233 00:11:59,127 --> 00:12:01,718 Just read the book, you shaved ape. 234 00:12:02,668 --> 00:12:06,673 Ow! I can't read ahead. I promised Lisa I wouldn't. 235 00:12:06,780 --> 00:12:09,745 Just take a peek at the title of the next chapter, 236 00:12:09,871 --> 00:12:12,315 and see if you can resist. 237 00:12:12,548 --> 00:12:15,078 "An Unexpected Occurrence"?! What could it be? 238 00:12:16,408 --> 00:12:20,315 - We hooked him, Galahad. - Yes, quite. 239 00:12:20,621 --> 00:12:24,829 "Angelica was trapped in the suffoclock of Sandy Doom..." 240 00:12:27,241 --> 00:12:30,142 "...as Headmaster Greystash fought a battle to the finish 241 00:12:30,199 --> 00:12:33,371 with dark wizard Maluicious Krubb." 242 00:12:33,478 --> 00:12:35,058 Time to choose, Greystash. 243 00:12:35,314 --> 00:12:38,218 If you save Angelica... you die! 244 00:12:51,109 --> 00:12:53,262 Good-bye... Angelica. 245 00:12:56,425 --> 00:12:57,923 Greystash. 246 00:12:58,811 --> 00:13:00,701 He killed Greystash! 247 00:13:01,540 --> 00:13:03,640 Thanks for spoiler the there, big mouth. 248 00:13:05,453 --> 00:13:06,902 - Hey, Bart. - Milhouse. 249 00:13:07,106 --> 00:13:10,702 Bart, why are you hanging around with Nelson so much? 250 00:13:10,767 --> 00:13:11,867 He's a bully. 251 00:13:11,973 --> 00:13:13,870 Hey, don't use the "B" word around me. 252 00:13:13,918 --> 00:13:14,826 It's offensive. 253 00:13:14,858 --> 00:13:16,712 - Yo, bully. - What up, my bully? 254 00:13:18,140 --> 00:13:19,788 How come they can say it? 255 00:13:20,876 --> 00:13:22,007 They just can, okay? 256 00:13:22,082 --> 00:13:25,185 It's weird to see you as somebody's sidekick. 257 00:13:25,392 --> 00:13:27,934 Whoa, Bart Simpson is nobody's sidekick. 258 00:13:27,997 --> 00:13:30,021 Then why are you wearing that vest? 259 00:13:30,327 --> 00:13:33,207 Because my chest is cold and my arms aren't. 260 00:13:33,414 --> 00:13:34,413 I see. 261 00:13:34,418 --> 00:13:38,114 Then I suppose you can just fly kites with whoever you want, 262 00:13:38,118 --> 00:13:40,499 right here in front of everyone. 263 00:13:40,605 --> 00:13:42,957 Come on, Bart. Throw the dork a bone. 264 00:13:44,335 --> 00:13:45,503 All right, I will. 265 00:13:53,695 --> 00:13:57,550 Blue and red, the colors of friendship. 266 00:14:06,992 --> 00:14:07,962 You're late. 267 00:14:08,065 --> 00:14:10,889 I was waiting to smash this frog with you, and it peed in my hand. 268 00:14:13,851 --> 00:14:17,641 Sorry. I was, uh... stealing loose grapes at the grocery store. 269 00:14:17,743 --> 00:14:20,528 Really? You call this stealing loose grapes? 270 00:14:26,390 --> 00:14:28,742 We were just having fun. Don't get upset. 271 00:14:28,788 --> 00:14:31,551 Oh, right. Stupid Nelson always gets upset. 272 00:14:31,654 --> 00:14:33,205 He'll probably do something stupid. 273 00:14:33,259 --> 00:14:34,859 Like smash his own camera! 274 00:14:37,522 --> 00:14:38,699 Look what you made me do! 275 00:14:40,801 --> 00:14:42,502 Nelson, get in here! 276 00:14:42,587 --> 00:14:45,683 The cat's eyes are runny, and I need you to dab 'em. 277 00:14:45,746 --> 00:14:46,874 Coming Ma! 278 00:14:46,880 --> 00:14:50,274 See you later, lying traitor! 279 00:14:53,067 --> 00:14:54,997 Something in your eye, Mr. Mooch? 280 00:14:55,606 --> 00:14:58,329 Well there's something in my eye, too. 281 00:15:02,033 --> 00:15:03,675 Ma, what happened to the curtains? 282 00:15:03,982 --> 00:15:06,755 I made 'em into a dress for karaoke singing. 283 00:15:07,309 --> 00:15:08,793 Hey Bart, do you want some ice cream? 284 00:15:08,954 --> 00:15:11,417 I just hit a major marshmallow vein. 285 00:15:11,523 --> 00:15:14,647 Oh! I think it goes all the way to the bottom. 286 00:15:14,750 --> 00:15:16,885 - No, thanks. - What's wrong? 287 00:15:17,290 --> 00:15:20,112 Me and Nelson were best friends, and now I think he's gonna kill me! 288 00:15:20,118 --> 00:15:21,288 Bully problem, eh? 289 00:15:21,593 --> 00:15:24,183 You know what they say all bullies are cowards. 290 00:15:24,389 --> 00:15:27,934 It's not true... they're brave, 'cause they're strong. 291 00:15:34,481 --> 00:15:36,272 Bart, we need to talk. 292 00:15:38,500 --> 00:15:41,334 I feel so bad about freaking out on you. 293 00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:43,512 It'll never happen again, I swear. 294 00:15:43,818 --> 00:15:46,159 Um... okay. 295 00:15:46,466 --> 00:15:49,026 Best friends? Forever? 296 00:15:49,335 --> 00:15:50,152 No! 297 00:15:50,156 --> 00:15:51,162 I can't do it. 298 00:15:51,167 --> 00:15:53,311 You're a nut bar, a whack job! 299 00:15:53,314 --> 00:15:54,323 A kooka-dooka! 300 00:15:54,330 --> 00:15:56,350 Please, just leave me alone. 301 00:15:56,506 --> 00:15:58,657 - Best not to get involved. - Agreed. 302 00:16:01,670 --> 00:16:04,414 Looks like you've made your choice. 303 00:16:04,518 --> 00:16:07,280 Make sure your affairs are in order. 304 00:16:07,285 --> 00:16:08,557 I've set up a trust. 305 00:16:08,562 --> 00:16:10,572 It bypasses the inheritance tax. 306 00:16:10,698 --> 00:16:13,150 Only till 2008. Look into it! 307 00:16:16,893 --> 00:16:18,664 Oh, Greystash... 308 00:16:19,874 --> 00:16:21,765 Greystash! 309 00:16:21,768 --> 00:16:22,767 Oh, hello, Lisa. 310 00:16:22,911 --> 00:16:24,733 Come on, Dad, read the last chapter. 311 00:16:24,836 --> 00:16:26,608 Everyone says there's a big surprise. 312 00:16:26,644 --> 00:16:30,048 I bet Angelica discovers that she's a wizard. 313 00:16:31,155 --> 00:16:34,651 How would you feel if something bad happened to Greystash? 314 00:16:34,757 --> 00:16:36,970 It would be the day my childhood ended. 315 00:16:37,476 --> 00:16:38,824 Come on, read, read! 316 00:16:41,185 --> 00:16:45,114 "Angelica was trapped in the Suffoclock of Sandy Doom..." 317 00:16:45,179 --> 00:16:50,006 Time to choose, Greystash. If you save Angelica, you die! 318 00:16:51,064 --> 00:16:53,717 Why are you stopping? We're almost at the happy ending. 319 00:16:55,026 --> 00:16:57,079 No book is gonna make my daughter sad. 320 00:16:57,384 --> 00:17:00,989 Time to do what I do best. Lie to a child! 321 00:17:01,194 --> 00:17:04,288 "Greystash looked Krubb right in the eye and said..." 322 00:17:05,947 --> 00:17:08,362 Mustache power: activate! 323 00:17:23,540 --> 00:17:26,967 Oh, man, I can't believe you beat me, but you did. 324 00:17:27,370 --> 00:17:30,505 I somehow escaped from the hourglass! 325 00:17:32,496 --> 00:17:34,917 And now, to go on living! 326 00:17:41,212 --> 00:17:42,780 The end. 327 00:17:44,072 --> 00:17:45,789 Is that really how it ends? 328 00:17:45,854 --> 00:17:47,996 What happened to the Merlinical Council? 329 00:17:49,036 --> 00:17:51,848 They went to Star Wars Land and fought star wars. 330 00:17:51,895 --> 00:17:54,778 Dad, you can read to me anytime. 331 00:17:55,807 --> 00:18:00,162 Now Lisa won't know about death till it strikes someone close to her. 332 00:18:10,650 --> 00:18:12,037 Dad's ending is better. 333 00:18:12,213 --> 00:18:15,760 Okay, field-trippers, welcome to the Springfield Tide Pools, 334 00:18:15,814 --> 00:18:18,086 nature's most fecund ecosystem. 335 00:18:18,291 --> 00:18:20,473 Who will spot the playful abalone? 336 00:18:20,476 --> 00:18:22,019 The mighty winkle? 337 00:18:22,323 --> 00:18:24,366 I think it might be you, Sherri. 338 00:18:25,243 --> 00:18:29,100 Now, remember, these pools can be dangerous, so everyone pick a buddy. 339 00:18:29,957 --> 00:18:31,333 Bart's my buddy. 340 00:18:32,012 --> 00:18:32,871 Good boy, Nelson. 341 00:18:33,316 --> 00:18:34,720 Squeeze him extra tight for safety. 342 00:18:38,229 --> 00:18:40,082 We sure are far from the rest of 'em. 343 00:18:40,769 --> 00:18:42,286 Funny how that happened, huh? 344 00:18:42,982 --> 00:18:43,661 Come with me. 345 00:18:46,155 --> 00:18:47,631 Nelson, please don't kill me. 346 00:18:47,727 --> 00:18:49,789 Remember when we made fun of Cinco de Mayo? 347 00:18:49,792 --> 00:18:51,113 I called it "Stinko de Mayo." 348 00:18:51,217 --> 00:18:52,358 We laughed so hard. 349 00:18:53,173 --> 00:18:53,972 Bart... 350 00:18:55,069 --> 00:18:57,853 you are a bad friend. 351 00:18:58,790 --> 00:18:59,989 S-Say again? 352 00:18:59,993 --> 00:19:01,765 You never liked me for me. 353 00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:04,694 You liked that I protected you and gave you a vest 354 00:19:04,698 --> 00:19:06,486 and stole milk boxes for you. 355 00:19:06,715 --> 00:19:09,497 I hate milk! It comes from cow wangs! 356 00:19:09,822 --> 00:19:11,082 There you go again. 357 00:19:11,085 --> 00:19:13,288 You act all nice, and then you go crazy. 358 00:19:13,292 --> 00:19:15,535 Well, maybe I get jealous. 359 00:19:15,741 --> 00:19:16,977 But it's just because... 360 00:19:17,745 --> 00:19:20,340 I never had a best friend before. 361 00:19:23,866 --> 00:19:26,579 Nelson, was the water always up to our necks? 362 00:19:28,276 --> 00:19:29,155 Nelson? 363 00:19:29,962 --> 00:19:31,179 Help! Help! 364 00:19:31,428 --> 00:19:33,566 - Put this on. - Where did you get it? 365 00:19:33,583 --> 00:19:34,620 Dude gave it to me. 366 00:20:00,622 --> 00:20:01,550 Man lips! 367 00:20:01,856 --> 00:20:06,112 Skinner loves Bart! Skinner loves Bart! 368 00:20:06,169 --> 00:20:09,974 Shut up! I'm just giving him CPR, the kiss of life. 369 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:11,971 And if anyone loves Bart, it's Nelson. 370 00:20:11,976 --> 00:20:12,784 Where is Nelson? 371 00:20:12,786 --> 00:20:15,009 I'm sorry, Nelson never woke up. 372 00:20:15,014 --> 00:20:17,117 - What?! - Never woke up, because... 373 00:20:17,152 --> 00:20:19,344 he never passed out he's right over there. 374 00:20:22,776 --> 00:20:24,138 Hey, thanks for saving me, man. 375 00:20:24,342 --> 00:20:27,094 Course I saved you you're my field trip buddy. 376 00:20:27,500 --> 00:20:29,885 - And nothing else. - You mean...? 377 00:20:30,008 --> 00:20:32,540 Exactly. You're barf to me now. 378 00:20:44,051 --> 00:20:45,651 Oh, Nelson... 379 00:20:45,704 --> 00:20:48,458 I'll never forget that week we were best friends. 380 00:20:58,292 --> 00:20:59,943 I touched your heart! 381 00:21:13,304 --> 00:21:17,423 Greystash! Greystash! 382 00:21:18,000 --> 00:21:20,361 Gee, you're really upset about this Greystash thing. 383 00:21:20,397 --> 00:21:21,676 Don't say his name. 384 00:21:22,082 --> 00:21:24,214 In your mouth, it sounds like dirt! 385 00:21:24,267 --> 00:21:25,866 Homer, it's just a book. 386 00:21:25,922 --> 00:21:29,107 No man should outlive his fictional wizard. 387 00:21:29,213 --> 00:21:30,312 No man!