1
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The Simpsons

2
00:00:10,344 --> 00:00:11,427
D'oh!

3
00:00:37,579 --> 00:00:40,081
Manjula, why did you bring
the octuplets to work?

4
00:00:40,165 --> 00:00:42,542
This is supposed to be
our special time together.

5
00:00:42,626 --> 00:00:44,335
Some special time.

6
00:00:44,420 --> 00:00:46,504
I get
to stand around
watching you sell

7
00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:49,298
fatty poisons to
overfed Americans.

8
00:00:50,759 --> 00:00:53,469
You'd think that would
deter me, but no.

9
00:00:56,098 --> 00:00:58,182
Look. Please, can you
just take the children home?

10
00:00:58,267 --> 00:01:01,728
The porno magazine buyers are
too embarrassed to make their
move. Look.

11
00:01:04,356 --> 00:01:05,356
Come on.

12
00:01:05,441 --> 00:01:07,567
All right.
Let's go, children.

13
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Cleanup in
all the aisles.

14
00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:17,827
Welcome, steady customer.

15
00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:20,663
I see you are ready
for the Civil War
reenactment.

16
00:01:20,748 --> 00:01:22,165
I need some supplies.

17
00:01:22,249 --> 00:01:25,918
A keg of beer and a six-pack
to hold me until I tap
the keg.

18
00:01:26,003 --> 00:01:27,503
Here you go.
Thanks.

19
00:01:27,588 --> 00:01:29,088
Are you sure
you don't want to come?

20
00:01:29,173 --> 00:01:33,009
In a Civil War
reenactment, we need
lots of Indians to shoot.

21
00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:36,053
I don't know which part
of that sentence to
correct first.

22
00:01:36,138 --> 00:01:39,182
But I cannot come.
I work 22 hours a day

23
00:01:39,266 --> 00:01:41,726
and then I
go home to a wife
who will not touch me.

24
00:01:41,810 --> 00:01:44,604
The Indian rope trick
has become the Indian
nope trick.

25
00:01:49,401 --> 00:01:51,360
The Squishee Lady!

26
00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:52,570
Oh, my God.

27
00:01:53,489 --> 00:01:56,783
I know you must
get this all the time,
but can I suggest a flavor?

28
00:01:56,867 --> 00:01:57,950
Go ahead.

29
00:01:58,035 --> 00:01:59,535
Grape.
Mmm.

30
00:02:01,288 --> 00:02:02,538
Hello, Annette.

31
00:02:02,706 --> 00:02:03,956
How's life, handsome?

32
00:02:04,041 --> 00:02:06,209
Oh, take a penny,
leave a penny.

33
00:02:08,587 --> 00:02:10,463
Hey, she called me
"handsome."

34
00:02:10,547 --> 00:02:12,173
She likes you.

35
00:02:12,299 --> 00:02:14,008
Put in a good word
for grape.

36
00:02:14,092 --> 00:02:15,843
Come on, guys!
We're gonna be late!

37
00:02:15,928 --> 00:02:18,805
Okay, okay.
Don't go Mary Todd on us.

38
00:02:29,233 --> 00:02:30,316
Come on, Barney.

39
00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:33,861
If you're
gonna be General Grant,
you have to have a drink.

40
00:02:33,946 --> 00:02:36,739
Yeah, but I'm
a recovering alcoholic, so...

41
00:02:36,824 --> 00:02:38,407
One drink won't hurt.

42
00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:44,330
Hey, you're right.

43
00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:46,624
I was afraid it would
start me drinking again,

44
00:02:46,708 --> 00:02:48,209
but it didn't!
Mmm-hmm.

45
00:02:49,336 --> 00:02:53,005
The second battle
of Springfield was
fought by the North,

46
00:02:53,757 --> 00:02:56,384
the South,
and the East

47
00:02:58,095 --> 00:03:00,346
to keep Springfield
in, out of,

48
00:03:00,472 --> 00:03:02,682
and next
to the Union,
respectively.

49
00:03:02,766 --> 00:03:04,851
Now, the actual battle
was fought over there

50
00:03:04,935 --> 00:03:06,978
where that man
is standing,

51
00:03:07,104 --> 00:03:09,188
but he won't move,
so we'll do it here.

52
00:03:09,273 --> 00:03:13,317
Very good. And now,
let the battle be joined.

53
00:03:18,740 --> 00:03:20,032
Bang, bang.

54
00:03:20,117 --> 00:03:21,409
Pow, pow.

55
00:03:21,785 --> 00:03:25,580
Hit with stick.
Hit with stick.
Die, you bastard.

56
00:03:25,956 --> 00:03:28,708
Whoa. Whoa, damn it.

57
00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:32,003
For me, the war is over!

58
00:03:33,463 --> 00:03:36,465
This battlefield is
rife with inaccuracy.

59
00:03:37,593 --> 00:03:39,552
You, dead people,
stop playing cards!

60
00:03:39,887 --> 00:03:42,430
And Stonewall Jackson,
stop rollerblading!

61
00:03:48,312 --> 00:03:50,688
The South will boogie again!

62
00:03:54,693 --> 00:03:56,569
This was supposed
to be a mock battle!

63
00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:59,030
Mock! Don't worry.

64
00:03:59,114 --> 00:04:02,658
I'm just gonna drain
the area around your wound.

65
00:04:02,743 --> 00:04:05,578
So cold. So cold.

66
00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:11,417
We are gathered
here this Memorial Day

67
00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:15,254
to once again honor
you World War II veterans.

68
00:04:15,339 --> 00:04:18,841
Truly, you are
the greatest generation.

69
00:04:19,301 --> 00:04:21,427
Keep it coming, Brokaw!

70
00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:24,931
Lauding
your legacy
is a labor of love.

71
00:04:25,015 --> 00:04:27,642
You're damn right, it is!
You can't thank us enough!

72
00:04:27,726 --> 00:04:30,269
Every generation stinks
but ours!

73
00:04:33,732 --> 00:04:34,774
Uh-oh.

74
00:04:34,858 --> 00:04:38,277
Sounds like America's
enemies are at it again.

75
00:04:38,362 --> 00:04:41,405
Greatest generation
to the rescue!

76
00:04:45,577 --> 00:04:47,912
And when I come back,
I want a foot rub!

77
00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:49,288
Yes, master.

78
00:04:52,167 --> 00:04:54,251
General, I hereby surrender.

79
00:04:54,336 --> 00:04:57,630
Ow! Not the pointed end,
you dumbass!

80
00:05:01,343 --> 00:05:02,969
Reinforcements!

81
00:05:06,556 --> 00:05:09,976
Tanks? Oh, this is
just too inaccurate.

82
00:05:10,268 --> 00:05:12,561
Well, then you're
definitely not going

83
00:05:12,688 --> 00:05:14,981
to like my
steam-powered
super spider.

84
00:05:15,065 --> 00:05:19,318
With the stepping
and the squishing and
the webs made of nylon.

85
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:30,079
The nylon
has been released!

86
00:05:31,415 --> 00:05:34,834
Now, you just
take the kids home.
I've gotta return this keg.

87
00:05:34,918 --> 00:05:37,169
Are you sure you can
get your deposit back?

88
00:05:37,254 --> 00:05:38,879
It's in pretty bad shape.

89
00:05:38,964 --> 00:05:41,924
Why do you always take
the side of local merchants?

90
00:05:42,968 --> 00:05:46,512
Now, Apu,
when you gave me
this keg, it had dents.

91
00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:47,930
And here's proof.

92
00:05:50,058 --> 00:05:51,308
Hey. Apu?

93
00:05:55,439 --> 00:05:59,191
That giggle is none of
my business, or is it?

94
00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:10,870
Squishee Lady,
you've had less than
eight kids, haven't you?

95
00:06:10,954 --> 00:06:12,288
Haven't you?

96
00:07:05,175 --> 00:07:07,510
Please do the Hindu
that you do so well.

97
00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:10,262
Avert your eyes, eunuch.

98
00:07:11,515 --> 00:07:13,099
What's a eunuch?

99
00:07:14,518 --> 00:07:16,268
"Unique... Unite..."

100
00:07:17,896 --> 00:07:19,271
Homie, what's wrong?

101
00:07:19,356 --> 00:07:20,397
Nothing. Nothing.

102
00:07:20,482 --> 00:07:22,191
There's nothing
eating me up inside.

103
00:07:24,361 --> 00:07:27,696
Oh. It must
be something big.

104
00:07:27,781 --> 00:07:28,781
Hmm.

105
00:07:28,865 --> 00:07:33,869
Something you did?
No! Something you saw?

106
00:07:35,539 --> 00:07:37,998
Apu is having
an affair?

107
00:07:38,083 --> 00:07:39,667
I know.
Can you believe it?

108
00:07:39,751 --> 00:07:42,002
Oh, Manjula's
just gonna die!

109
00:07:42,087 --> 00:07:43,963
How did you find out?

110
00:07:44,047 --> 00:07:47,133
In my role as customer,
I saw the whole thing.

111
00:07:47,217 --> 00:07:49,093
Oh, this is so awkward.

112
00:07:49,177 --> 00:07:51,804
Today's the day
we play badminton with them.

113
00:07:51,888 --> 00:07:54,723
Oh, I hope
no one makes
any double entendres.

114
00:07:57,185 --> 00:08:00,896
Oh, Apu,
you keep scoring
while my back is turned.

115
00:08:02,524 --> 00:08:04,483
Are you sure
you're not cheating?

116
00:08:06,111 --> 00:08:08,904
Now, Manjula,
do you want me to
find another partner?

117
00:08:08,989 --> 00:08:13,200
No! No, no, let's
just keep playing.
What's the score?

118
00:08:13,285 --> 00:08:15,578
Dirty love.
I mean 30-love!

119
00:08:15,745 --> 00:08:17,913
I mean,
anyone for penis?

120
00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:20,040
I'll just get
the shuttlecock.

121
00:08:20,125 --> 00:08:21,250
Oh!

122
00:08:28,175 --> 00:08:31,886
Here, guys.
Why don't we play this?

123
00:08:49,404 --> 00:08:51,363
Marge, why are you crying?

124
00:08:51,448 --> 00:08:53,282
You're not in
any physical pain,

125
00:08:53,366 --> 00:08:56,035
the only kind of pain
a man can understand.

126
00:08:56,119 --> 00:08:59,079
We have
to do something to
save that marriage.

127
00:09:00,248 --> 00:09:04,543
Maybe I should
just tell Manjula.
Or you could talk to Apu.

128
00:09:04,628 --> 00:09:06,378
He already knows.

129
00:09:06,463 --> 00:09:07,546
Let's tell Krusty.

130
00:09:07,631 --> 00:09:09,131
What would
that accomplish?

131
00:09:09,216 --> 00:09:12,801
That guy's hilarious.
His reaction would
be priceless.

132
00:09:13,094 --> 00:09:14,678
Apu is cheating.

133
00:09:15,430 --> 00:09:18,474
That's sad.
All those kids.

134
00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:21,393
I think he's building
to something.

135
00:09:23,647 --> 00:09:28,067
So anyway,
if you take that bottle
down and pass it around...

136
00:09:28,151 --> 00:09:31,904
I know. I know.
There will be 47 bottles
of beer on the wall. Yes.

137
00:09:31,988 --> 00:09:33,864
Homer, you did not
bring me here for this.

138
00:09:33,949 --> 00:09:35,366
What is it that
you want to tell me?

139
00:09:35,450 --> 00:09:38,035
Okay. This isn't easy, so
I'm just gonna come out
and say it.

140
00:09:38,119 --> 00:09:41,580
Let's say this
pepper got married
to this salt shaker,

141
00:09:41,665 --> 00:09:45,334
and along comes
sexy Mrs. Dash.

142
00:09:45,418 --> 00:09:48,712
Homie, it's
11:00 at night.
Have you told him yet?

143
00:09:48,797 --> 00:09:50,589
A girl in the bar!
What do we do?

144
00:09:50,674 --> 00:09:52,549
Watch and learn,
you dinks.

145
00:09:54,219 --> 00:09:55,219
Ma'am.

146
00:09:55,637 --> 00:09:57,930
Is there something
you want to tell me?

147
00:09:58,014 --> 00:10:00,849
I saw you and
that Squishee Lady

148
00:10:01,184 --> 00:10:03,310
canoodling like
junkyard rabbits!

149
00:10:03,395 --> 00:10:05,479
It's true.

150
00:10:05,563 --> 00:10:08,524
It only
happened once,
but I am so ashamed.

151
00:10:08,692 --> 00:10:10,025
I am scum.

152
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:14,780
Yes, you are scum.

153
00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:18,617
What do you think
I should do?

154
00:10:18,702 --> 00:10:21,453
Tell that woman it's over
between you and her.

155
00:10:21,538 --> 00:10:23,789
Yes. First thing
in the morning,
I promise.

156
00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:26,542
Hey, Marge, you care
for a tropical drink?

157
00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,252
Sure. (SNIFFING)

158
00:10:28,336 --> 00:10:29,628
Is that Windex?

159
00:10:29,713 --> 00:10:32,298
It's Windelle.
I can't afford Windex.

160
00:10:36,678 --> 00:10:39,179
Okay, Apu,
be strong.

161
00:10:39,889 --> 00:10:43,642
Before you measure
my syrup levels,
I must talk to you.

162
00:10:43,727 --> 00:10:44,977
While you talk,

163
00:10:45,061 --> 00:10:47,479
I'm just
gonna help myself
to some licorice rope.

164
00:10:47,564 --> 00:10:50,274
As much as I enjoy
your company, and
I truly do,

165
00:10:50,358 --> 00:10:53,319
I must insist that from
this point forward,
we not...

166
00:10:53,403 --> 00:10:55,946
Oh, my goodness!
What are you doing?

167
00:10:59,284 --> 00:11:02,870
Whoa, ha-mahatama, hatama,
hatama, hatama, hatama,
hatama, hatama.

168
00:11:05,749 --> 00:11:09,418
Not tonight.
I said not tonight.

169
00:11:10,462 --> 00:11:12,713
Wait, something's wrong.

170
00:11:12,797 --> 00:11:15,215
Why aren't you
pressuring me
for sex?

171
00:11:15,300 --> 00:11:16,925
Oh, I'm just happy
to lie here

172
00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:18,844
appreciating
and respecting you.

173
00:11:18,928 --> 00:11:21,722
Okay, Buster,
what is going on?

174
00:11:21,806 --> 00:11:25,392
Nothing! How can you even
accuse me of repeated
infidelity?

175
00:11:25,477 --> 00:11:28,187
I am so angry, I could just,
I could fall asleep! I...

176
00:11:33,443 --> 00:11:35,152
...completely innocent.

177
00:11:37,447 --> 00:11:40,032
Apu! Come here a moment!

178
00:11:40,116 --> 00:11:43,786
This better be good because
you are interrupting
my faithfulness...

179
00:11:43,870 --> 00:11:44,870
Oh, boy.

180
00:11:44,954 --> 00:11:48,999
I took the tape out of
the store surveillance
camera. Look.

181
00:11:49,084 --> 00:11:52,378
Oh, Apu,
scratch and win!

182
00:11:52,796 --> 00:11:55,714
Mmm!
That's good adultery!

183
00:11:57,675 --> 00:11:59,426
Oh, I am
so sorry, Manjula.

184
00:11:59,511 --> 00:12:02,179
Oh! Get out
of my home, Apu!

185
00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:16,318
I always thought
karma was baloney,
but not anymore.

186
00:12:17,654 --> 00:12:19,154
Caramel baloney.

187
00:12:21,157 --> 00:12:25,202
Hey, Kirk Van Houten.
I live across the way.

188
00:12:25,620 --> 00:12:28,705
If you don't like
losing at cribbage,
stay out of my place.

189
00:12:28,790 --> 00:12:29,915
Okay.

190
00:12:29,999 --> 00:12:32,000
No, no!
I'll let you win.
I'll let you win.

191
00:12:32,085 --> 00:12:34,628
God, I'm really lonely.

192
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,965
Welcome back to
Inside The Actors Studio.

193
00:12:38,049 --> 00:12:39,591
We've met
Rainier Wolfcastle,

194
00:12:39,676 --> 00:12:42,928
actor, novelist,
barbecue sauce
spokesman.

195
00:12:43,012 --> 00:12:45,139
Now can we meet McBain?

196
00:12:45,557 --> 00:12:47,599
Let me get into character.

197
00:12:49,519 --> 00:12:52,020
Okay, I'm McBain.

198
00:12:55,275 --> 00:12:56,900
All right, Mendoza!

199
00:12:56,985 --> 00:13:01,071
I'll give you
the Maxwell Circuit
if you put down my daughter.

200
00:13:05,535 --> 00:13:09,204
It's a pleasure to
eat your lead, good sir.

201
00:13:10,707 --> 00:13:13,667
Kids, we want to talk
to you about something.

202
00:13:13,751 --> 00:13:16,920
You might hear from
your friends or co-workers

203
00:13:17,005 --> 00:13:19,756
that Apu isn't
living at home anymore.

204
00:13:19,841 --> 00:13:22,926
I just wish there was
something we could do.

205
00:13:23,178 --> 00:13:24,178
Oh.

206
00:13:24,262 --> 00:13:27,431
Oh, Homer,
are you thinking
what I'm thinking?

207
00:13:27,515 --> 00:13:28,974
You bet I am.

208
00:13:32,395 --> 00:13:35,439
You can run,
but you can't glide!

209
00:13:38,193 --> 00:13:40,360
USA! USA!

210
00:13:40,445 --> 00:13:44,907
Tonight, we invite both
Manjula and Apu for dinner,

211
00:13:44,991 --> 00:13:47,993
but we don't tell them
the other one's coming.

212
00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:51,038
And Krusty.
We gotta invite Krusty.

213
00:13:51,122 --> 00:13:53,499
I keep telling you,
off-camera,

214
00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:56,084
he's a desperately
unhappy man.

215
00:13:56,294 --> 00:13:59,963
But if we
remind Apu and Manjula
of why they fell in love,

216
00:14:00,048 --> 00:14:02,174
maybe they can
work out their problems.

217
00:14:02,258 --> 00:14:05,427
Yeah! 'Cause if they don't...

218
00:14:11,100 --> 00:14:14,603
Manjula, we've got
a special guest
for you.

219
00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:16,522
Is it my
husband's whore?

220
00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:18,065
Even better!

221
00:14:18,942 --> 00:14:20,776
This is going great!

222
00:14:21,152 --> 00:14:25,280
Look who's here!
It's this thing!

223
00:14:27,283 --> 00:14:29,868
I am Ganesh, your god.

224
00:14:30,954 --> 00:14:32,204
I am truly screwed.

225
00:14:32,288 --> 00:14:37,042
I order you
to get back together
or I'll suck your blood!

226
00:14:37,126 --> 00:14:38,377
Blah, blah!

227
00:14:38,461 --> 00:14:40,003
Bart,
stick to the script.

228
00:14:40,088 --> 00:14:41,171
Don't be a jerk.

229
00:14:41,256 --> 00:14:43,590
You're the jerk.
You're the jerk!

230
00:14:50,014 --> 00:14:53,392
I know you have all gone
to a lot of trouble to
meddle in my affairs,

231
00:14:53,643 --> 00:14:56,687
but you
cannot change my mind
with one night of blasphemy

232
00:14:56,771 --> 00:15:00,399
and store-bought tandoori.
Or should I say blandoori?

233
00:15:01,693 --> 00:15:03,443
Manjula, please.

234
00:15:03,528 --> 00:15:05,070
I have known we were
meant to be together

235
00:15:05,154 --> 00:15:07,573
ever since my mother
forced me to marry you.

236
00:15:07,657 --> 00:15:08,865
If you give me
another chance,

237
00:15:08,950 --> 00:15:10,867
I'll do anything
to make it up to you.

238
00:15:11,536 --> 00:15:12,536
Mmm.

239
00:15:12,745 --> 00:15:14,288
Come here, you.

240
00:15:15,164 --> 00:15:18,625
These are divorce papers!
Consider yourself served!

241
00:15:20,837 --> 00:15:23,839
Hey, pally. Where do
you want the Fudge Mahal?

242
00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:27,926
Uh, we didn't order that.

243
00:15:28,886 --> 00:15:31,847
(WHISPERING)
Can I lick your fingers?
Meet me at the mail slot.

244
00:15:37,562 --> 00:15:41,106
I have to warn you,
Apu does not have
very much money.

245
00:15:41,190 --> 00:15:42,649
Are you absolutely sure?

246
00:15:42,734 --> 00:15:44,860
Because legally,
I am allowed to
shake him

247
00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:47,863
by the ankles and
see what falls out.

248
00:15:47,947 --> 00:15:51,366
It's established in the case
of Lawyers v. Justice.

249
00:15:51,451 --> 00:15:53,994
That was
a wonderful day for us.

250
00:15:56,205 --> 00:15:58,498
Now, we have
eight children.

251
00:15:58,875 --> 00:16:00,792
Will that affect
the settlement?

252
00:16:03,546 --> 00:16:04,630
Perhaps.

253
00:16:09,093 --> 00:16:11,720
No offense,
but you remind me
of the monkey man

254
00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:13,639
who slaughtered
my family's chickens.

255
00:16:13,723 --> 00:16:15,891
Yes. I get that a lot.

256
00:16:17,143 --> 00:16:18,935
I have to think
all of this over.

257
00:16:19,020 --> 00:16:20,896
I still have
feelings for Apu.

258
00:16:21,898 --> 00:16:23,398
I understand.

259
00:16:24,233 --> 00:16:25,317
Who is Apu?

260
00:16:25,401 --> 00:16:29,196
The face of divorce is not
as beautiful as I had hoped.

261
00:16:29,280 --> 00:16:30,989
Perhaps there
is another way.

262
00:16:31,074 --> 00:16:36,161
When will you humans learn
that your feelings, as you
call them,

263
00:16:36,245 --> 00:16:40,415
can stand in the way
of big cash payoffs?

264
00:16:47,924 --> 00:16:51,802
Manjula, come quick!
The octuplets said
their first words.

265
00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:53,679
Mommy...
Will...

266
00:16:53,763 --> 00:16:54,805
You...
Let...

267
00:16:54,889 --> 00:16:56,098
Daddy...
Come...

268
00:16:56,182 --> 00:16:57,349
Back?
Cookie!

269
00:16:57,433 --> 00:16:59,935
Oh. They miss their father.

270
00:17:00,436 --> 00:17:02,604
Are you sure you don't
want to take him back?

271
00:17:02,689 --> 00:17:07,442
Well, I do, but I don't
want him to think that
I am a doormat.

272
00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:09,027
I need payback!

273
00:17:09,112 --> 00:17:11,613
All right!
Girls night out!

274
00:17:11,698 --> 00:17:14,074
Exotic male dancers
at the Golden Banana!

275
00:17:14,158 --> 00:17:16,451
No. I want him to suffer.

276
00:17:16,536 --> 00:17:19,746
Oh. Well, when Homer
does something wrong,

277
00:17:19,831 --> 00:17:22,624
I write a list of ways
he can make it up to me.

278
00:17:22,709 --> 00:17:25,460
Then I shred the list
and put it in his food.

279
00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:27,671
All right.
We will write a list.

280
00:17:27,755 --> 00:17:28,839
At the Golden Banana?

281
00:17:28,923 --> 00:17:29,965
No!

282
00:17:30,174 --> 00:17:31,174
Oh.

283
00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:36,596
Over, under, round and round
so your feet won't touch
the ground.

284
00:17:38,933 --> 00:17:42,436
Now let's see
what awaits me
in the next life.

285
00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:48,066
First I was a tiger, a snake,
a clod, a goat with a hat,
then me.

286
00:17:48,151 --> 00:17:51,737
A tapeworm,
then assistant
to Lorne Michaels!

287
00:17:52,447 --> 00:17:55,115
It's going to be
a rough couple
of lifetimes.

288
00:17:57,326 --> 00:17:58,368
Manjula!

289
00:17:58,453 --> 00:18:00,829
Oh, Apu,
you are such
a Brahma queen.

290
00:18:01,664 --> 00:18:03,081
Have you come
to forgive me?

291
00:18:03,207 --> 00:18:04,624
I am willing to
take you back...

292
00:18:04,709 --> 00:18:07,502
Really?
Provided you
complete these tasks.

293
00:18:07,587 --> 00:18:09,838
"Number one,
break up with
Squishee girl."

294
00:18:09,922 --> 00:18:11,465
Well, that's a no-brainer.

295
00:18:11,549 --> 00:18:13,091
"Number two, lose weight.

296
00:18:13,176 --> 00:18:16,094
"Number three, get cartoon
published in New Yorker.

297
00:18:16,179 --> 00:18:20,307
"Number four,
legally change name
to Slime Q. Slimedog.

298
00:18:20,391 --> 00:18:23,602
"Number five, wear
nametag that says same."

299
00:18:23,686 --> 00:18:27,439
I know
a great nametag place.
They do fabulous work.

300
00:18:27,523 --> 00:18:28,857
It's where I got this.

301
00:18:30,777 --> 00:18:33,862
So our relationship is over,
is that what you're saying?

302
00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:35,697
Yes, I'm afraid so.

303
00:18:36,532 --> 00:18:38,158
Well, we had fun.

304
00:18:38,242 --> 00:18:41,203
Hey, Apu,
I think she likes you.

305
00:18:47,460 --> 00:18:49,169
This Squishee's awful.

306
00:18:49,253 --> 00:18:53,256
I only sell Smooshies now.
Squishees reminded me
of my misdeeds.

307
00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:57,302
My Smooshie tastes
like a shopping bag.

308
00:18:57,386 --> 00:18:59,888
Mine tastes
like dog fur!

309
00:19:00,181 --> 00:19:02,057
Yes, but look
at the deliveryman.

310
00:19:02,141 --> 00:19:03,725
He is hideous.

311
00:19:03,810 --> 00:19:06,603
Oh, a challenge!

312
00:19:11,859 --> 00:19:13,944
Wait a minute!
This isn't on the list!

313
00:19:14,028 --> 00:19:16,571
It's been on my list
for a long time!

314
00:19:22,286 --> 00:19:23,411
Not bad, eh?

315
00:19:23,496 --> 00:19:26,706
I bought the issue for
Richard Avedon's
pictures of Lenny.

316
00:19:28,417 --> 00:19:31,711
"Eliza, where the devil
are my slippers?"

317
00:19:34,966 --> 00:19:36,341
Bravo! Bravo!

318
00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:40,136
"My Fair Lady performed
with all-octuplet cast."
Done.

319
00:19:41,389 --> 00:19:42,347
Good show! Yeah!

320
00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:43,515
Yeah!

321
00:19:43,599 --> 00:19:45,141
It was magic.

322
00:19:45,226 --> 00:19:49,813
He took a Cockney flower girl
and turned her into
My Fair Lady.

323
00:19:49,897 --> 00:19:52,691
I liked all the roles
filled by minority actors.

324
00:19:52,775 --> 00:19:54,860
Why, I didn't
even notice.

325
00:19:54,944 --> 00:19:57,487
Apu, you have
completed the list.

326
00:19:57,572 --> 00:19:59,197
You may now move
back with your family

327
00:19:59,282 --> 00:20:01,074
and your
never-ending disgrace.

328
00:20:01,158 --> 00:20:04,452
Wait, wait!
You forgot to
eat a light bulb.

329
00:20:05,121 --> 00:20:07,414
Thank you very much,
you big fat blabbermouth!

330
00:20:07,498 --> 00:20:11,042
I... Sorry, sorry.
It's been a rough month.

331
00:20:11,127 --> 00:20:15,589
Here you go.
Don't worry, I soaked it
in the toilet to soften it up.

332
00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:25,056
So, back in the old bed.
I never realized
it was so wide.

333
00:20:25,141 --> 00:20:27,934
Yes, back to our
marital closeness.

334
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:31,521
Maybe we can't rush things.

335
00:20:31,606 --> 00:20:34,816
Oh, Apu, I want us
to be a family again.

336
00:20:35,067 --> 00:20:39,195
But it will take some time.
We will know when it feels
right again.

337
00:20:39,906 --> 00:20:41,656
Whenever you are ready.

338
00:21:53,062 --> 00:21:54,062
ENGLISH - US - PSDH