1
00:00:39,994 --> 00:00:42,663
-Looks like you got a leak.
-Could you start fixing it?
2
00:00:42,830 --> 00:00:47,575
The basement is getting awfully flooded.
And I think the cat's down there.
3
00:00:48,252 --> 00:00:52,463
Yeah, I probably won't be able to get
the parts I need for two, three weeks.
4
00:00:52,673 --> 00:00:54,666
And that's if I order them today.
5
00:00:54,883 --> 00:00:58,135
-Which I won't.
-Oh, dear.
6
00:01:00,431 --> 00:01:02,139
Emergency call. Gotta go.
7
00:01:02,349 --> 00:01:06,514
-What should we do until you get back?
-Put a pan down there.
8
00:01:11,191 --> 00:01:12,520
It didn't work.
9
00:01:15,904 --> 00:01:18,313
Lousy traffic jams.
10
00:01:18,532 --> 00:01:21,450
The traffic report will
get me out of this one.
11
00:01:21,827 --> 00:01:23,535
This is Ernie Pie.
12
00:01:23,745 --> 00:01:28,788
We got a little accident that's backing
traffic up as far as this reporter can see.
13
00:01:38,051 --> 00:01:39,795
Hi, Dad.
14
00:01:46,643 --> 00:01:50,344
Hey, how come you guys
got such great parking places?
15
00:01:50,563 --> 00:01:53,351
-It's a secret.
-Shut up.
16
00:02:02,075 --> 00:02:05,326
All right, Econo-Save,
you just made the list.
17
00:02:10,208 --> 00:02:12,449
Hey, will you guys help me fix my--?
18
00:02:14,211 --> 00:02:18,127
Hey, how come you guys
got better chairs than me?
19
00:02:18,341 --> 00:02:21,010
-It's a secret.
-Shut up.
20
00:02:27,057 --> 00:02:28,884
Hey, you guys
wanna go bowling tonight?
21
00:02:29,101 --> 00:02:31,722
-No, we're busy.
-Yeah, we got things to do.
22
00:02:31,937 --> 00:02:33,682
Like what?
23
00:02:33,897 --> 00:02:36,021
It's a secret.
24
00:02:36,358 --> 00:02:38,351
Shut up.
25
00:02:40,279 --> 00:02:42,652
So Lenny and Carl are never
around on Wednesdays.
26
00:02:42,823 --> 00:02:45,576
They don't tell me where they go.
It's like a conspiracy.
27
00:02:45,742 --> 00:02:49,824
A conspiracy, eh? You think they're
involved in the Kennedy assassination?
28
00:02:50,038 --> 00:02:52,447
I do now.
29
00:02:52,666 --> 00:02:55,287
I'm gonna follow them tonight
and see where they go.
30
00:02:55,502 --> 00:02:59,749
Oh, Homer, don't start stalking
people again. It's so illegal.
31
00:02:59,923 --> 00:03:03,257
You stalked Charles Kuralt because
you thought he dug up your garden.
32
00:03:03,468 --> 00:03:06,967
-Well, something did.
-I don't want you stalking anyone.
33
00:03:07,138 --> 00:03:09,629
Oh, okay.
Have it your own way, Marge.
34
00:03:09,849 --> 00:03:11,557
I'll be back in a minute.
35
00:03:11,768 --> 00:03:14,852
I'm going outside...
36
00:03:15,063 --> 00:03:17,602
...to stalk...
37
00:03:17,816 --> 00:03:20,734
...Lenny and Carl...
38
00:03:37,669 --> 00:03:40,872
All I have to do
is follow the yellow-drip road.
39
00:03:47,470 --> 00:03:50,388
-There's our secret meeting place.
-Yes. Let's go inside.
40
00:03:50,556 --> 00:03:52,466
Sounds good.
41
00:04:06,864 --> 00:04:10,400
I can see everything
and they're none the wiser.
42
00:04:20,502 --> 00:04:23,041
-An intruder!
-He will pay the ultimate price.
43
00:04:23,255 --> 00:04:25,794
Yes, the ultimate price.
44
00:04:26,008 --> 00:04:28,760
Get out of here!
45
00:04:31,471 --> 00:04:33,927
I saw weird stuff
in that place last night.
46
00:04:34,141 --> 00:04:39,135
Weird, strange, sick, twisted, eerie.
godless, evil stuff. And I want in.
47
00:04:39,354 --> 00:04:41,560
We don't know what
you're talking about, Homer.
48
00:04:41,732 --> 00:04:44,306
You can't join the Stonecutters.
It's too exclusive.
49
00:04:44,484 --> 00:04:45,979
Oh, well.
50
00:04:46,194 --> 00:04:48,864
That was a real nice
secret organization we had once.
51
00:04:49,072 --> 00:04:50,780
Stonecutters, eh? How do I join?
52
00:04:50,991 --> 00:04:52,817
There are two ways
to gain membership:
53
00:04:53,034 --> 00:04:55,110
-Be the son of a Stonecutter.
-Next.
54
00:04:55,328 --> 00:04:57,203
Or save the life of a Stonecutter.
55
00:04:57,414 --> 00:04:58,825
Hey!
56
00:04:59,499 --> 00:05:03,627
I saved your life. That egg sandwich
could've killed you by cholesterol.
57
00:05:03,837 --> 00:05:07,419
Forget it, Homer. While it has been
established eggs contain cholesterol...
58
00:05:07,590 --> 00:05:10,378
...it has not been proven
that they raise the level...
59
00:05:10,593 --> 00:05:13,002
...of serum cholesterol
in the human bloodstream.
60
00:05:13,221 --> 00:05:15,261
Those Egg Council creeps
got to you too?
61
00:05:15,473 --> 00:05:19,340
Oh, you got it all wrong, Homer.
It's not like that.
62
00:05:20,770 --> 00:05:22,561
You'd better run, egg!
63
00:05:22,855 --> 00:05:24,848
Why don't people like me, Marge?
64
00:05:25,066 --> 00:05:27,901
Everyone likes you.
You're a wonderful person.
65
00:05:28,110 --> 00:05:31,195
Why don't those stupid idiots
let me in their crappy club for jerks?
66
00:05:31,405 --> 00:05:33,896
-I'm sure it's nothing personal, Homer.
-It is.
67
00:05:34,116 --> 00:05:36,738
It's been happening to me all my life.
68
00:05:39,121 --> 00:05:42,870
Hey, Billy, hey, Joey, come on in.
There's plenty of room.
69
00:05:43,083 --> 00:05:45,919
-Sorry. Not you, Homer.
-Why not?
70
00:05:48,589 --> 00:05:50,665
But you let in Homer Glumpet.
71
00:05:50,883 --> 00:05:53,885
It says "no Homers."
72
00:05:54,094 --> 00:05:55,553
We're allowed to have one.
73
00:05:57,181 --> 00:05:59,672
I felt so left out.
74
00:05:59,892 --> 00:06:04,436
-Kids can be so cruel.
-We can? Thanks, Mom.
75
00:06:04,730 --> 00:06:07,103
Cut it out, Bart!
76
00:06:07,733 --> 00:06:10,058
I'd give anything
to get into the Stonecutters.
77
00:06:10,277 --> 00:06:12,483
-What do they do there, Dad?
-I'm a member.
78
00:06:12,696 --> 00:06:15,365
What do they do?
What don't they do?
79
00:06:15,574 --> 00:06:17,982
Oh, they do so many things,
they never stop.
80
00:06:18,201 --> 00:06:22,282
-Oh, the things they do there. My stars.
-You don't know what they do, do you?
81
00:06:22,497 --> 00:06:24,490
-Not as such, no.
-I'm a Stonecutter.
82
00:06:24,708 --> 00:06:28,374
Remember these self-hypnosis classes
we took to help us ignore Grampa?
83
00:06:28,587 --> 00:06:31,706
Do I ever. It's five years later
and I still think I'm a chicken.
84
00:06:31,923 --> 00:06:34,130
-I'm a chicken, Marge.
-I know, I know.
85
00:06:34,342 --> 00:06:36,217
Maybe we should be
listening to him now.
86
00:06:36,428 --> 00:06:38,254
I'm a member!
87
00:06:38,430 --> 00:06:40,137
-What?
-What?
88
00:06:40,306 --> 00:06:42,382
You're a member of
the Stonecutters, Grampa?
89
00:06:42,600 --> 00:06:44,842
Oh, sure. Let's see.
90
00:06:45,061 --> 00:06:48,181
I'm an Elk, a Mason, a Communist.
91
00:06:48,398 --> 00:06:52,348
I'm the president of the Gay & Lesbian
Alliance, for some reason.
92
00:06:52,568 --> 00:06:55,688
Here it is. The Stonecutters.
93
00:06:55,905 --> 00:06:57,531
This is it. My ticket in.
94
00:06:57,740 --> 00:07:00,231
They have to let me join
if I'm the son of a member.
95
00:07:00,451 --> 00:07:02,860
I'll take this Communist one too.
96
00:07:03,663 --> 00:07:06,700
Coming through. Can't throw me out.
My father's a member.
97
00:07:06,916 --> 00:07:09,371
-I'm in, I'm in.
-Okay, okay, Homer, you're in.
98
00:07:09,585 --> 00:07:11,246
Just don't point that thing at me.
99
00:07:11,462 --> 00:07:14,546
Thanks, Lenny.
When am I gonna be initiated?
100
00:07:14,757 --> 00:07:18,209
-As soon as Number One gets here.
-Number One?
101
00:07:18,427 --> 00:07:21,180
What kind of stupid
Wiener name is that?
102
00:07:21,388 --> 00:07:25,933
"Hello, my name is Number One."
103
00:07:26,393 --> 00:07:27,936
And so forth.
104
00:07:28,145 --> 00:07:29,604
We call each other by number.
105
00:07:29,772 --> 00:07:32,939
Carl is Number 14, I'm Number 12.
Burnsie is Number 29.
106
00:07:33,150 --> 00:07:35,559
-You outrank Mr. Burns here?
-Sure. Watch.
107
00:07:35,778 --> 00:07:38,566
Hey, 29, get over here!
108
00:07:41,825 --> 00:07:43,818
Thank you, sir. May I have another?
109
00:07:46,747 --> 00:07:49,784
Patience, Monty. Climb the ladder.
110
00:07:51,793 --> 00:07:54,035
-Is he the leader?
-Of this chapter.
111
00:07:54,212 --> 00:07:57,380
There are chapters all over the world.
And it has been foretold...
112
00:07:57,549 --> 00:07:59,459
...that someday a Chosen One will--
113
00:07:59,676 --> 00:08:02,132
Okay, okay. I didn't ask
for your life story.
114
00:08:05,390 --> 00:08:07,881
Let the initiation begin.
115
00:08:08,101 --> 00:08:11,221
All Stonecutters must take
the Leap of Faith.
116
00:08:11,438 --> 00:08:16,397
If you survive this five-story plunge,
your character will be proven.
117
00:08:17,736 --> 00:08:19,064
Happy landings!
118
00:08:31,541 --> 00:08:35,586
I think I have to do it again.
My blindfold came off.
119
00:08:36,379 --> 00:08:39,796
This ritual is called
Crossing the Desert.
120
00:08:41,926 --> 00:08:45,793
And this we call the Unblinking Eye.
121
00:08:48,266 --> 00:08:51,018
Hey, have you ever noticed
that the Crossing the Desert...
122
00:08:51,227 --> 00:08:52,935
...is a lot like the Unblinking Eye?
123
00:08:53,104 --> 00:08:55,345
And exactly like
the Wreck of the Hesperus.
124
00:08:55,564 --> 00:08:57,309
And now the final ordeal:
125
00:08:57,483 --> 00:09:01,398
The Paddling of the Swollen Ass,
with paddles.
126
00:09:05,032 --> 00:09:09,113
And by the sacred parchment,
I swear that if I reveal the secrets...
127
00:09:09,328 --> 00:09:11,997
...of the Stonecutters,
may my stomach become bloated...
128
00:09:12,206 --> 00:09:15,705
...and my head he plucked
of all but three hairs.
129
00:09:15,918 --> 00:09:17,745
He should have to take
a different oath.
130
00:09:17,961 --> 00:09:19,753
Everyone takes the same oath.
131
00:09:19,963 --> 00:09:22,502
Welcome to the club, Number 908.
132
00:09:22,716 --> 00:09:25,421
You have joined the Sacred Order
of the Stonecutters...
133
00:09:25,636 --> 00:09:28,673
...who since ancient times
have split the rocks of ignorance...
134
00:09:28,847 --> 00:09:31,516
...that obscure the light
of knowledge and truth.
135
00:09:31,725 --> 00:09:34,134
Now let's all get drunk
and play Ping-Pong.
136
00:09:35,604 --> 00:09:37,728
He's already kind of heavy,
you know, and...
137
00:09:41,026 --> 00:09:44,774
Well, to be honest, I never got around
to ordering that part for you.
138
00:09:44,988 --> 00:09:47,444
So it's still gonna be
a couple of weeks.
139
00:09:47,657 --> 00:09:50,576
-Oh, really?
-Yes.
140
00:09:50,785 --> 00:09:53,490
-Really?
-Yes. Yes.
141
00:09:53,705 --> 00:09:57,572
But what if I were to shake your hand
in this way?
142
00:10:01,671 --> 00:10:03,830
Well, I didn't realize
you were a member.
143
00:10:12,056 --> 00:10:13,634
So long, suckers.
144
00:10:26,070 --> 00:10:28,146
-Same old space, huh, Dad?
-Yep.
145
00:10:28,322 --> 00:10:33,862
But they gave me these Rollerblades
so I can glide to the front door.
146
00:10:37,540 --> 00:10:38,868
Sweet.
147
00:10:41,794 --> 00:10:45,246
-Jealous?
-Well, no. We've got the same chair.
148
00:10:45,464 --> 00:10:46,923
You're jealous.
149
00:10:47,508 --> 00:10:50,343
-Your membership pack.
-What's this?
150
00:10:50,552 --> 00:10:53,091
You put that on your car
so you won't get any tickets.
151
00:10:53,305 --> 00:10:55,714
This keeps paramedics
from stealing your wallet.
152
00:10:55,933 --> 00:10:59,634
Oh, and don't bother calling 911
anymore. Here's the real number.
153
00:11:03,732 --> 00:11:07,184
I still don't believe all the
Founding Fathers were Stonecutters.
154
00:11:07,402 --> 00:11:10,191
That's because you trust
your stupid schoolbooks.
155
00:11:10,405 --> 00:11:12,565
Here's what really happened
at the signing...
156
00:11:12,741 --> 00:11:15,066
...of the Declaration of Independence.
157
00:11:17,287 --> 00:11:19,992
And a nation is born.
158
00:11:20,207 --> 00:11:24,288
Now let us party like 'twere 1799!
159
00:11:26,004 --> 00:11:30,132
Qua”! Qua”! Qua”!
160
00:11:33,261 --> 00:11:36,096
Please, sir. You're destroying
my establishment.
161
00:11:36,264 --> 00:11:41,852
We just created the greatest democracy
on earth, lowlife commoner! Get out!
162
00:11:42,020 --> 00:11:45,602
Wanna see how Davy Crockett really
died at the Alamo? You must be 18.
163
00:11:46,274 --> 00:11:49,228
Homer, a man who called himself
"you know who"...
164
00:11:49,402 --> 00:11:52,938
...just invited you to a secret
"wink-wink" at the "you know what."
165
00:11:53,114 --> 00:11:55,439
Sure are popular
now that you're a Stonecutter.
166
00:11:55,616 --> 00:12:00,777
Oh, yeah. Beer busts, beer blasts,
keggers, stein hoist...
167
00:12:00,955 --> 00:12:02,830
...AA meetings, beer night.
168
00:12:02,999 --> 00:12:07,958
It's wonderful, Marge. I've never
felt so accepted in all my life.
169
00:12:08,129 --> 00:12:10,454
These people look
deep within my soul...
170
00:12:10,631 --> 00:12:15,424
...and assign me a number
based on the order in which I joined.
171
00:12:20,015 --> 00:12:23,931
Who controls the British crown?
Who keeps the metric system down?
172
00:12:24,103 --> 00:12:28,184
We do
We do
173
00:12:28,399 --> 00:12:32,527
Who leaves Atlantis off the maps?
Who keeps the Martians under wraps?
174
00:12:32,695 --> 00:12:36,361
We do
We do
175
00:12:36,782 --> 00:12:40,780
Who holds back the electric car?
176
00:12:40,953 --> 00:12:45,164
Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star?
177
00:12:45,332 --> 00:12:49,413
We do
We do
178
00:12:49,586 --> 00:12:53,584
Who robs cavefish of their sight?
Who rigs every Oscar night?
179
00:12:53,757 --> 00:12:56,841
We do
180
00:12:57,010 --> 00:13:00,795
We do
181
00:13:01,765 --> 00:13:03,841
Thank you. Tonight we are here...
182
00:13:04,017 --> 00:13:07,802
...to commemorate our glorious
society's 1500th anniversary.
183
00:13:08,021 --> 00:13:10,856
And in honor of this
momentous occasion...
184
00:13:11,024 --> 00:13:14,523
-...we're having ribs.
-Yeah!
185
00:13:16,738 --> 00:13:21,317
I need a bib. If I slop any on my shirt,
I could lose the respect of my brethren.
186
00:13:21,493 --> 00:13:23,403
So let us rejoice and enjoy our meal...
187
00:13:23,578 --> 00:13:28,822
...in the shadow of the hallowed
sacred parchment.
188
00:13:31,169 --> 00:13:35,333
-Homer.
-Oh, yeah. Thanks, Lenny.
189
00:13:35,757 --> 00:13:38,082
This is just appalling and outrageous.
190
00:13:38,259 --> 00:13:40,465
What? Did I miss something?
191
00:13:42,680 --> 00:13:44,008
Oh, God!
192
00:13:44,181 --> 00:13:46,934
No, Homer, no! This is outrageous!
You can't do that!
193
00:13:47,143 --> 00:13:50,097
-No!
-You really are stupid.
194
00:13:54,483 --> 00:13:57,521
And the official Stonecutter
underwear too.
195
00:14:04,368 --> 00:14:07,239
Please don't kick me out.
This society's everything to me.
196
00:14:07,413 --> 00:14:10,283
Please give me another chance.
I've learned my lesson!
197
00:14:10,457 --> 00:14:12,866
I've learned my lesson!
198
00:14:13,919 --> 00:14:15,627
That's it!
199
00:14:15,796 --> 00:14:17,955
-How can we punish him further?
-Oh, sorry.
200
00:14:18,132 --> 00:14:22,793
Homer Simpson, for your continuing
and baffling desecration...
201
00:14:22,970 --> 00:14:25,295
...of our beloved sacred parchment...
202
00:14:25,472 --> 00:14:29,221
...you are hereby banished
from the Stonecutters forever.
203
00:14:29,393 --> 00:14:33,889
And as a final humiliation,
you must walk home naked...
204
00:14:34,064 --> 00:14:38,015
...dragging behind you
the Stone of Shame.
205
00:14:46,952 --> 00:14:48,280
The mark!
206
00:14:49,788 --> 00:14:53,370
Oh, that. It's just a birthmark.
And I'll thank you not to stare.
207
00:14:53,583 --> 00:14:56,252
He's the Chosen One.
208
00:14:58,004 --> 00:15:00,377
You are the Chosen One...
209
00:15:00,548 --> 00:15:05,128
...whom the sacred parchment
prophesied would lead us to glory.
210
00:15:05,386 --> 00:15:09,467
Now to the top of Mount Springfield
for the coronation.
211
00:15:09,641 --> 00:15:12,844
Remove the Stone of Shame.
212
00:15:13,061 --> 00:15:17,058
Attach the Stone of Triumph!
213
00:15:34,081 --> 00:15:35,789
Mental note: Don't overdo this.
214
00:15:42,631 --> 00:15:43,664
Peekaboo!
215
00:15:48,679 --> 00:15:50,636
I always wondered
if there was a God.
216
00:15:50,806 --> 00:15:53,641
And now I know.
There is, and it's me.
217
00:15:53,809 --> 00:15:57,676
-You're not a god, Homer.
-Remember, Dad, all glory is fleeting.
218
00:15:57,855 --> 00:16:00,773
-So?
-Beware the Ides of March.
219
00:16:00,941 --> 00:16:02,602
-No.
-I know you're happy now...
220
00:16:02,776 --> 00:16:05,611
-...but it won't last forever.
-Everything lasts forever.
221
00:16:05,779 --> 00:16:10,156
Getting what you want all the time
will leave you unfulfilled and joyless.
222
00:16:10,325 --> 00:16:11,654
Remove the girl.
223
00:16:11,868 --> 00:16:16,412
You're not with your Stonecutters. There
are no lackeys around to carry out your--
224
00:16:23,922 --> 00:16:25,832
Another strike for the Chosen One!
225
00:16:26,007 --> 00:16:28,000
Hurrah!
226
00:16:34,349 --> 00:16:35,844
That's just an excellent break.
227
00:16:36,017 --> 00:16:38,638
-Oh, most assuredly.
-Absolutely.
228
00:16:46,402 --> 00:16:48,277
-I'm out.
-No, no, no. Homer...
229
00:16:48,446 --> 00:16:51,566
...you have a royal sampler.
230
00:16:51,741 --> 00:16:54,825
Oh, I win again, don't I?
231
00:16:55,244 --> 00:16:57,700
-Good one.
-Nice hand, Chosen One.
232
00:16:57,872 --> 00:17:00,162
You know, I think you guys
are letting me win.
233
00:17:00,333 --> 00:17:03,915
No! No! No!
234
00:17:04,086 --> 00:17:06,542
From now on I want you
to be honest with me.
235
00:17:06,714 --> 00:17:08,541
I mean, I'm not perfect, right?
236
00:17:10,968 --> 00:17:14,052
-Yeah.
-Well...
237
00:17:18,392 --> 00:17:20,053
Run.
238
00:17:25,274 --> 00:17:28,062
The grand exalted leader
requests a moment of your time.
239
00:17:28,652 --> 00:17:30,776
Class dismissed.
240
00:17:34,408 --> 00:17:37,528
Lisa, you were right.
My happiness is fading.
241
00:17:37,703 --> 00:17:41,451
You're experiencing spiritual emptiness
because your power has isolated you...
242
00:17:41,623 --> 00:17:45,408
-...from other human beings.
-What do you mean, isolated?
243
00:17:47,254 --> 00:17:51,418
Well, maybe you could reach out to
the community and help other people.
244
00:17:51,925 --> 00:17:54,546
I could help others.
245
00:17:54,719 --> 00:18:00,177
I'll get a bunch of monkeys, dress them
up and make them reenact the Civil War.
246
00:18:00,350 --> 00:18:02,011
Dad, that doesn't help people.
247
00:18:02,185 --> 00:18:05,472
Couldn't hurt. Unless the monkeys
started hurting people.
248
00:18:05,647 --> 00:18:08,186
Which they almost certainly would.
249
00:18:13,029 --> 00:18:14,524
Brothers. Brothers!
250
00:18:16,574 --> 00:18:20,027
Brothers, I've learned
a wonderful lesson.
251
00:18:20,203 --> 00:18:24,865
Helping others makes our own lives
better and makes us better people.
252
00:18:25,041 --> 00:18:28,161
So instead of just shooting pool
and drinking beer...
253
00:18:28,336 --> 00:18:32,998
...let us Stonecutters use what we have
to help the less fortunate.
254
00:18:36,761 --> 00:18:40,462
He's gone mad with power,
like that Albert Schweitzer guy.
255
00:18:51,108 --> 00:18:53,149
Oh, for the love of God!
256
00:18:53,319 --> 00:18:54,517
Somebody get the Jaws of Life!
257
00:18:58,491 --> 00:19:01,610
Higher! Higher!
258
00:19:01,785 --> 00:19:04,324
Oh, I'll give you higher,
my filthy little urchin.
259
00:19:09,543 --> 00:19:12,212
You've won this round.
260
00:19:17,259 --> 00:19:20,343
Oh, thank you, Mr. Simpson.
261
00:19:20,512 --> 00:19:22,802
It looks so much better.
262
00:19:22,973 --> 00:19:26,057
A beautiful sky blue.
263
00:19:28,061 --> 00:19:32,972
You were right, Lisa.
I've never felt so spiritually fulfilled.
264
00:19:33,150 --> 00:19:35,985
And with my brothers
the Stonecutters behind me...
265
00:19:36,153 --> 00:19:40,068
...this is the beginning
of a better world for all of us.
266
00:19:40,282 --> 00:19:42,523
-We gotta kill him!
-Take it easy, Moe.
267
00:19:42,701 --> 00:19:46,912
Let's hear from the Stonecutter World
Council before we act too rashly.
268
00:19:47,080 --> 00:19:48,492
-Kill him.
-Kill him.
269
00:19:48,665 --> 00:19:51,038
-Kill the fool!
-Afraid I have to disagree...
270
00:19:51,209 --> 00:19:55,954
...with Orville, Jack and Mister. Can't
we just do something to his voice box?
271
00:19:56,172 --> 00:19:58,082
We might as well face the truth.
272
00:19:58,258 --> 00:20:02,125
As long as we're Stonecutters,
he will control our lives.
273
00:20:02,303 --> 00:20:06,680
Maybe. But maybe we don't
wanna be Stonecutters no more.
274
00:20:12,313 --> 00:20:15,931
This is much better than
the old Stonecutter hall.
275
00:20:16,109 --> 00:20:19,228
Silence. I now call to order
the first meeting...
276
00:20:19,403 --> 00:20:22,441
...of the ancient, mystic society of...
277
00:20:22,615 --> 00:20:23,943
...No Homers.
278
00:20:26,911 --> 00:20:28,821
Hey, fellas. Can I join?
279
00:20:28,996 --> 00:20:32,199
Sorry. No Homers.
280
00:20:34,043 --> 00:20:35,704
Loyal Stonecutters...
281
00:20:35,878 --> 00:20:39,626
...let us begin our reenactment
of the Battle of Gettysburg.
282
00:20:42,259 --> 00:20:45,842
Homer, you can't just keep hanging out
with these Colobus monkeys.
283
00:20:46,013 --> 00:20:48,504
Somebody's gonna get parasites.
284
00:20:48,682 --> 00:20:52,135
Oh, Marge, kids, I miss my club.
285
00:20:52,311 --> 00:20:55,099
Oh, Homie.
286
00:20:55,272 --> 00:20:59,400
You know, you are a member
of a very exclusive club.
287
00:20:59,568 --> 00:21:03,400
-The Black Panthers?
-No, the family Simpson...
288
00:21:03,572 --> 00:21:05,945
...which has just five members.
289
00:21:06,116 --> 00:21:10,031
And only two of those members
have special rings.
290
00:21:10,245 --> 00:21:12,451
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
291
00:21:13,248 --> 00:21:15,039
I meant our wedding rings!
292
00:21:16,835 --> 00:21:18,792
You know, Marge, you're right.
293
00:21:18,962 --> 00:21:24,669
The Simpson family is the best
possible club I could belong to.
294
00:21:29,764 --> 00:21:32,469
This club better be worth it.
295
00:21:33,101 --> 00:21:35,592
All right, all right, it's Lisa's turn.
296
00:21:46,531 --> 00:21:50,528
Who controls the British crown?
Who keeps the metric system down?
297
00:21:50,702 --> 00:21:54,783
We do
We do
298
00:21:54,956 --> 00:21:59,001
Who keeps Atlantis off the maps?
Who keeps the Martians under wraps?
299
00:21:59,168 --> 00:22:03,249
We do
We do
300
00:22:03,422 --> 00:22:07,420
Who holds back the electric car?
301
00:22:07,593 --> 00:22:11,674
Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star?
302
00:22:11,847 --> 00:22:15,893
We do
We do
303
00:22:16,060 --> 00:22:20,057
Who robs cavefish of their sight?
Who rigs every Oscar night?
304
00:22:20,231 --> 00:22:23,232
We do
305
00:22:23,400 --> 00:22:27,268
We do
306
00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:30,155
Shut up.