1
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(SINGING) The Simpsons

2
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(CROW CAWlNG)

3
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(MUFFLED SCREAM)

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(SCHOOL BELL RlNGlNG)

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(BARNEY BELCHES)

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(HORN BELLOWlNG)

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(LENNY SHRlEKS)

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(PLAYlNG DlFFERENT TUNE)

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(TlRES SCREECHlNG)

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(HONKlNG)

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(EXCLAlMlNG)

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(TlRES SCREECHlNG)

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D'oh!

14
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(BRAKES SCREECHlNG)

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Aha!

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(MARGE GASPS)

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Today we induct the newest honoree
to the Springfield Wall ofFame,

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who will take his place along
such Iuminaries as Duffman,

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Poochie and the man
who invented the yield sign, Paul Yield.

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Now please welcome the newest inductee
into the Springfield Wall of Fame,

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Iocal businessman,

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frequent flyer silver cardholder,
and Iegendary 20% tipper,

23
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(ALL GASP)

24
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Springfield's own Vance Connor!

25
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(ALL CHEERlNG)

26
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-Hi, hi.
-MAN: You're better than us!

27
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-Homer, that guy's your age?
-No, he's ten days younger.

28
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So you're saying he'll look like you
in ten days?

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If he's lucky.

30
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The guy owns a few local businesses
and everyone treats him like he's God!

31
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Well, God doesn't need
his own special day.

32
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What about Sunday?

33
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Sunday's the Lord's day, boy. Not God's.
Completely different guy.

34
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Your father's just jealous because Vance
was our class president in high school.

35
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If I had won class president,

36
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I'd be the one getting
thrown up in the air right now.

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Dad, you ran for class president?

38
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Yep. Back in high school,
right before I met your mother.

39
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A simpler time
when the only thing we worried about

40
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was total nuclear annihilation.

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(ROCK THE BOA TPLAYlNG)

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-(SINGING) Rock the boat
-(SINGING) Don't rock the boat, baby

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-Rock the boat
-Don 't tip the boat over

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So under my reign as vice president,

45
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we sent three mathletes
to the state finals.

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AII of the tenth graders '
Iima beans germinated.

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-ALL: Y eah!
-Yeah, you should be proud.

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So if you want to build on that,
vote for me,

49
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and you will all advance with Vance!

50
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Now I'm gonna throw it back to a guy
who, in my opinion,

51
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is the classiest principal in the business,

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(DONDALlNGER COUGHlNG)

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Principal Dondalinger!

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Ladies, I've seen him up close.
And, yes, his eyes are that green.

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Our next candidate is Homer Simpson.

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PIease hold your applause forever.

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(MICROPHONE WHISTLING)

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My fellow Wildcats.

59
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My name is Homer Simpson.

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(LOUDL Y)
There are many reasons why I...

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I... I...

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You know what?

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(CONFUSED M URMURlNG)

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I spent all night working on that speech.

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But now I realize the best thing to do
is speak from my heart.

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-WOMAN: His heart!
-So...

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I feel that... Fellow Wildcats...

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(STAMMERlNG lN FEAR)

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Webster defines...
In the words of Ted Nugent...

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You... School spirit... Next card...
The future...

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(ALL LAUGHlNG)

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I've never heard a speech so bad.
Ten days detention!

73
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No fair!

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Anyone who votes for Vance
gets a half day tomorrow.

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Half day, eh?

76
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(GROANS)

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Don't feel bad, Homie. I married you!

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And you're a million times better than...

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(GASPS) Here comes Vance!

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-Hey, Vance!
-Thanks for coming out.

81
00:05:03,303 --> 00:05:05,999
-Hey, Gail. I love your bangs.
-Hi.

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There they are.
My favorite mixed-race couple.

83
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Guys that popular and confident
are never truly happy.

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-He looks happy.
-Tears of a clown.

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He's not crying.
And he's not known for clowning.

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Exception that proves the rule.
If losers like me know one thing,

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it's that deep down,
winners like him are miserable.

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Watch, I'll prove it.
Angry nut coming through!

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Clear a path, boys.

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(HOMER MURMURlNG ANGRlLY)

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-Hey, Vance.
-Hey, Homer Simpson. How you been?

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00:05:38,871 --> 00:05:43,672
Great. Thanks. Listen, settle a bet.
Behind that smile, you're dying, right?

93
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Behind this smile is a bigger smile
trying to get out.

94
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Oh! Oh! Here it comes! Oh, yeah!

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Please! You gotta have
some secret agony!

96
00:05:53,753 --> 00:05:55,482
I bet those fancy shoes hurt your feet.

97
00:05:55,588 --> 00:05:57,579
No. Actually they're
like two leather clouds.

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Oh!

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Got them from a buddy of mine
with a store in Shelbyville.

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-You want his number?
-No. Yes.

101
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Hey, Homer. You want to try
my new Vance Connorpolitan?

102
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Like Vance, it is smooth, cool,
and oh so sophisticated.

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I'll just stick with my beer.

104
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Homer, why are you so down
on Vance Connor?

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-He gave me one of his kidneys.
-Yeah, me, too.

106
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Because when Vance beat me
in that election, he ruined my life.

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Why did you just exchange
that look of guilt?

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(SlGHS) Lenny, I think it's time
for us to come clean.

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(SOFTLY)
About how we give each other haircuts?

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No. We'll take that secret to our graves.
I'm talking about... You know.

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(CLEARS THROAT) Right. Listen, Homer.

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Something weird
happened back in high school.

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Teenage Carl and I
were walking down the hallway when...

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You two. I want you to take this box
and bury it in the woods.

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The true results of this election
must never be known.

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I tell you what.
We'll do it under one condition.

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Our parents want us to go to college.

118
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But with a bad enough recommendation
from you, we can stay here and party.

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Okay. But screw this up

120
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and it's Carnegie Mellon University
for the both of you!

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(BOTH GASP)

122
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So there's a chance I actually won.
I gotta dig up that ballot box!

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-Just let it go, Homer.
-Al Gore?

124
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Homer, I had a presidential election
stolen from me. But I moved on.

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And I think you could say
everything worked out all right.

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Isn't that right, Alfred?

127
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(lN HlGH VOlCE) "lt sure is, Albert."

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(HOMER MUTTERlNG)

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Ballots stolen. Real winner unknown.
What is the truth? I gotta know!

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-Lenny, wake up!
-Finally you return my shovel!

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That's not why I'm here. Get dressed!

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-California casual or business attire?
-California casual.

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(LENNY GULPS)

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(HOMER AND LENNY GRUNTlNG)

135
00:08:04,217 --> 00:08:05,912
-There it is!
-The ballot box?

136
00:08:06,018 --> 00:08:09,613
No. This is the box that tells us
where the ballot box is.

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(LENNY READlNG)

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What will this box reveal?

139
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And what will I use this box
for afterwards?

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Mismatched nuts and bolts? Recipes?
I may never know.

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LlSA: Vance Connor.
HOMER: D'oh!

142
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LlSA: Homer Simpson.
HOMER: Woo-hoo!

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-Vance Connor.
-D'oh!

144
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-Homer Simpson.
-Woo-hoo!

145
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-Vance Connor.
-D'oh!

146
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-Homer Simpson.
-Woo-hoo!

147
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-Please stop doing that.
-"D'oh," or "woo-hoo"?

148
00:08:36,082 --> 00:08:41,486
Both. Homer Simpson, Vance Connor,
Fonzie, Homer Simpson.

149
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And the winner is

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(GASPS) Homer Simpson.

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Yes! I'm senior class president!

152
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I get a parking spot
if the assistant principal isn't using it!

153
00:08:51,631 --> 00:08:52,859
(HOMER LAUGHlNG)

154
00:08:53,232 --> 00:08:57,760
Wait a second. If I'd been class president
like I was supposed to,

155
00:08:57,870 --> 00:09:01,271
I'd be the one with the big mansion,
and the color TVs, and the hot wife!

156
00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:04,138
-Hey!
-Marge, I still would be married to you,

157
00:09:04,243 --> 00:09:06,336
but you would just be hotter.

158
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Ohhh!

159
00:09:07,513 --> 00:09:09,481
Dad, just 'cause you won
a high school election

160
00:09:09,582 --> 00:09:11,675
doesn't mean your whole life
would've been better.

161
00:09:11,784 --> 00:09:13,479
That's exactly what it means!

162
00:09:13,586 --> 00:09:16,453
And Dondalinger took that life
away from me!

163
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:19,855
And the taking of a life is murder!
And the punishment for murder is...

164
00:09:19,959 --> 00:09:22,393
Well, it varies from state to state
and by race,

165
00:09:22,495 --> 00:09:24,588
but I'm gonna find Dondalinger

166
00:09:24,697 --> 00:09:27,427
and tell him
I know what he did last summer,

167
00:09:27,533 --> 00:09:30,366
22 years ago in the winter!

168
00:09:42,348 --> 00:09:43,542
(DONDALlNGER CHUCKLES)

169
00:09:43,649 --> 00:09:45,480
That's the thing about
you assistant principals.

170
00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:47,712
You can drive the ball but you can't putt.

171
00:09:47,820 --> 00:09:49,014
(ALL LAUGHlNG)

172
00:09:49,121 --> 00:09:50,816
Wait a minute. You're not in our foursome.

173
00:09:50,923 --> 00:09:53,790
No other foursome would have me.
My legs gross people out.

174
00:09:53,893 --> 00:09:55,554
HOMER: Dondalinger!

175
00:09:58,397 --> 00:09:59,364
Uh-oh.

176
00:09:59,465 --> 00:10:02,434
Looks like one of my former students
on a quest for truth.

177
00:10:04,103 --> 00:10:06,663
Dondalinger,
I should've been class president!

178
00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:08,933
But you stole the election from me!

179
00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:13,273
I can explain. But are you sure
we should talk in front of your son?

180
00:10:13,379 --> 00:10:16,314
Yes! I want him to know that if your life
doesn't turn out the way you want,

181
00:10:16,415 --> 00:10:17,712
there's someone else to blame!

182
00:10:17,817 --> 00:10:20,251
(CHUCKLlNG) I already knew that, Dad.
I'm gonna blame you.

183
00:10:20,353 --> 00:10:21,513
I respect your choice.

184
00:10:21,621 --> 00:10:24,181
Now drive back to the clubhouse
and order me a Tom Collins.

185
00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:25,723
With a virgin Tom Collins for me?

186
00:10:25,825 --> 00:10:27,486
(SCOFFS) Virgin. What are you? A girl?

187
00:10:34,567 --> 00:10:35,625
(BART LAUGHS)

188
00:10:35,735 --> 00:10:38,101
Now, Dondalinger, I want some answers.

189
00:10:38,204 --> 00:10:41,264
Very well. It's a fact,
I didn't like you, Simpson. Still don't.

190
00:10:41,374 --> 00:10:43,069
You lie. You love me.

191
00:10:43,175 --> 00:10:46,770
Whatever complex emotions I feel,
they're not why I did what I did.

192
00:10:46,879 --> 00:10:48,676
There was another reason.

193
00:10:48,914 --> 00:10:49,938
(JIVE TALKIN'PLAYlNG)

194
00:10:50,049 --> 00:10:51,607
Jive talkin'

195
00:10:51,717 --> 00:10:54,151
You're telling me Iies

196
00:10:54,253 --> 00:10:55,413
Jive talkin'

197
00:10:55,521 --> 00:10:58,115
(CHUCKLES) Homer Simpson,
what a loser!

198
00:10:58,224 --> 00:11:01,682
Hey, what if we got everyone
to vote for him as a joke and he won?

199
00:11:01,794 --> 00:11:04,228
Then we could laugh at him
all the way through high school

200
00:11:04,330 --> 00:11:05,627
and at every reunion!

201
00:11:05,731 --> 00:11:07,665
-Go, sports!
-Go, sports!

202
00:11:07,767 --> 00:11:09,394
(BOTH GRUNTlNG)

203
00:11:11,437 --> 00:11:12,631
Hmm.

204
00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:18,405
So you see, I disposed of the ballot box
to spare your feelings.

205
00:11:19,178 --> 00:11:21,942
You denied me my dream! So I'm angry!

206
00:11:22,048 --> 00:11:24,573
But you did it out of kindness,
so I'm grateful.

207
00:11:24,684 --> 00:11:27,744
I'm filled with respect
and contempt for you.

208
00:11:27,853 --> 00:11:30,219
I... Why you...

209
00:11:30,489 --> 00:11:31,456
Oh.

210
00:11:31,557 --> 00:11:32,524
(HOMER GRUNTS ANGRlLY)

211
00:11:32,625 --> 00:11:34,991
You are so... I hate you!

212
00:11:35,428 --> 00:11:37,919
As principal, I did a lot of things
I'm not proud of.

213
00:11:38,030 --> 00:11:41,158
I would steal school chalk
from my own chalkboard.

214
00:11:41,267 --> 00:11:43,428
But I'm not sorry I rigged that election.

215
00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:46,164
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I'm gonna sit under that tree

216
00:11:46,272 --> 00:11:48,672
and think of all the women
I could've talked to but didn't.

217
00:11:50,176 --> 00:11:51,143
Hmm.

218
00:11:51,243 --> 00:11:53,336
The brown-haired girl gave me a look.

219
00:11:53,446 --> 00:11:56,040
The red head in the park
was reading a book.

220
00:11:56,148 --> 00:12:01,814
The girl at the airport upgraded my car.
Tonight, I wonder just where you are.

221
00:12:05,591 --> 00:12:07,422
Homie, you're barely eating.

222
00:12:07,526 --> 00:12:10,393
Yeah. I can actually see your hands.
They're not just a blur.

223
00:12:10,496 --> 00:12:12,225
I don't feel much like eating.

224
00:12:12,331 --> 00:12:15,596
I'll never know what would've happened
if I had been class president.

225
00:12:16,135 --> 00:12:18,831
LUlGl: (lN lTALlAN ACCENT)
You could know if you dared.

226
00:12:18,938 --> 00:12:20,098
Huh? Who said that?

227
00:12:20,206 --> 00:12:23,733
In the kitchen is a man
from the old country who works for me.

228
00:12:23,843 --> 00:12:25,401
He stirs the sauce.

229
00:12:25,511 --> 00:12:29,413
They say if he stirs the sauce just right,

230
00:12:29,515 --> 00:12:33,178
he can also see what might have been!

231
00:12:34,019 --> 00:12:36,886
As a rational skeptic,
I find that hard to believe.

232
00:12:36,989 --> 00:12:39,981
Also as a vegetarian,
I hope there's not meat in that sauce.

233
00:12:40,092 --> 00:12:43,493
-Any other orders, Mussolini?
-No. That's it.

234
00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:47,157
(lN lTALlAN ACCENT) Watch the sauce.
You see what I see?

235
00:12:47,266 --> 00:12:49,496
-I see a hair.
-You see too much!

236
00:12:49,602 --> 00:12:52,571
Now watch the sauce of bubbling red.

237
00:12:52,671 --> 00:12:55,765
-And see the life you could've led.
-Okay.

238
00:12:56,342 --> 00:12:58,105
(COOK GRUNTlNG)

239
00:12:59,211 --> 00:13:01,611
COOK: Yes, I like to stir.

240
00:13:03,582 --> 00:13:06,244
Your new senior class president is,

241
00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:07,608
(BOY LAUGHS)

242
00:13:07,720 --> 00:13:09,449
(SlGHS) Homer Simpson.

243
00:13:09,555 --> 00:13:10,886
(ALL LAUGHlNG)

244
00:13:10,990 --> 00:13:14,687
-Our president's a real loser!
-Yeah. A loser like us!

245
00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:18,355
He proves you don't have to be popular
to have everyone like you.

246
00:13:18,464 --> 00:13:22,423
-(CHANTlNG) Homer! Homer! Homer!
-BOTH: (CHANTlNG) Homer! Homer!

247
00:13:22,535 --> 00:13:26,494
ALL: Homer! Homer! Homer! Homer...

248
00:13:26,605 --> 00:13:28,004
(ECHOING)

249
00:13:29,742 --> 00:13:31,232
I would've been a winner!

250
00:13:31,343 --> 00:13:33,743
Instead of some idiot spending
his Saturday nights

251
00:13:33,846 --> 00:13:35,939
staring into a bowl of sauce!

252
00:13:36,048 --> 00:13:38,676
Why did fate do this to me?

253
00:13:38,884 --> 00:13:41,216
Ask the garlic bread.

254
00:13:42,888 --> 00:13:44,321
Why? Why?

255
00:13:44,423 --> 00:13:48,257
Hey, everyone! The stupid fat man's
talking to garlic bread!

256
00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:50,021
(COOK LAUGHlNG)

257
00:13:53,866 --> 00:13:55,857
Come on, stir! I must see more!

258
00:13:55,968 --> 00:13:58,801
Homie, please.
Nothing good will come of this.

259
00:13:58,904 --> 00:14:02,067
Marge, unlike CPR,
this is something I must know!

260
00:14:02,174 --> 00:14:07,237
Very well. Now we must once
more stare madly into the sauce.

261
00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:18,281
Mr. President, we need a class song,
a class motto, and a class mascot!

262
00:14:18,390 --> 00:14:21,052
Color My World, "Disco Sucks,"
and Butthead the goat.

263
00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:24,755
Mr. President, do you approve
of the bailout of the French Club?

264
00:14:24,864 --> 00:14:26,195
They're too big to fail.

265
00:14:26,298 --> 00:14:28,596
Homer, do you have a date
for the prom yet?

266
00:14:28,701 --> 00:14:32,569
Sorry. The only girl I could ever want
is right over there.

267
00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:35,173
Debbie Pinson.

268
00:14:38,310 --> 00:14:40,744
Hey, Debbie. Want to go to prom with me?

269
00:14:40,846 --> 00:14:44,009
Well, I'm engaged to the quarterback,
but yes!

270
00:14:46,785 --> 00:14:48,116
Forget it, Marge.

271
00:14:48,220 --> 00:14:51,849
A girl like you could never land
a Homer Simpson.

272
00:14:51,991 --> 00:14:52,958
LlSA: Aha!

273
00:14:53,058 --> 00:14:55,083
So Dad's life
would actually have been worse

274
00:14:55,194 --> 00:14:58,960
because he wouldn't have gotten together
with Mom, his one true love.

275
00:14:59,064 --> 00:15:01,794
Just keep watching the sauce, girlie.

276
00:15:03,435 --> 00:15:06,063
(BAND PLAYlNG
SOFT lNSTRUMENTAL MUSlC)

277
00:15:06,772 --> 00:15:07,761
(HOMER SlGHS)

278
00:15:07,873 --> 00:15:13,709
I got the biggest lapels, the ruffliest shirt,
and the most beautiful girl.

279
00:15:13,812 --> 00:15:15,404
Thank you, Homer.

280
00:15:16,015 --> 00:15:18,609
Debbie, I forgot I have an English paper
due on Monday.

281
00:15:18,717 --> 00:15:20,844
Would you read
To Kill a Mockingbirdfor me?

282
00:15:20,953 --> 00:15:22,614
And if you could write down
how Boo Radley

283
00:15:22,721 --> 00:15:25,884
fits into the southern gothic tradition,
that would be great.

284
00:15:25,991 --> 00:15:29,222
Nobody's ever asked me
to use my head brain before.

285
00:15:30,496 --> 00:15:32,054
(ALL CLAPPlNG)

286
00:15:34,833 --> 00:15:37,063
Homer Simpson, class president.

287
00:15:37,169 --> 00:15:39,069
MARGE: Oh, my God! He's talking to me!

288
00:15:39,171 --> 00:15:41,230
A lot of great things
have happened to me lately.

289
00:15:41,340 --> 00:15:44,104
(CHUCKLES) But they're nothing
compared to meeting you.

290
00:15:44,209 --> 00:15:48,202
-May I have this dance?
-Only if it lasts forever.

291
00:15:50,582 --> 00:15:54,678
Homer Simpson!
I was gonna let you get to fifth base!

292
00:15:54,787 --> 00:15:57,551
It would've been something
you told your grandchildren about!

293
00:15:57,656 --> 00:16:01,057
Sorry, Debbie.
I hope you can find happiness without me.

294
00:16:01,460 --> 00:16:03,018
(HOMER HUMMlNG)

295
00:16:04,129 --> 00:16:06,791
Who wants a cheerleader on the rebound?

296
00:16:07,866 --> 00:16:09,527
I do! Right.

297
00:16:12,271 --> 00:16:15,240
I can hardly believe this is real.

298
00:16:15,341 --> 00:16:20,711
Marge, the way I feel about you
is as real and lasting as my hairline.

299
00:16:22,815 --> 00:16:26,546
(EXCLAlMS) Who's that side of beef
munching on our sister?

300
00:16:26,652 --> 00:16:31,112
I don't know. But in this reality
I am not gay. Hubba hubba!

301
00:16:32,558 --> 00:16:33,957
HOMER: Sweet dreams.

302
00:16:36,862 --> 00:16:41,162
Young man, you have the noble bearing
of the Barbarian leader Vercingetorix.

303
00:16:41,266 --> 00:16:43,166
Thank you, mysterious weirdo.

304
00:16:43,268 --> 00:16:47,796
Tell me, what student government office
do you hold? Secretary? Treasurer?

305
00:16:47,906 --> 00:16:50,238
Dare I say secretary-treasurer?

306
00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:51,639
I'm class president.

307
00:16:52,044 --> 00:16:56,413
Hot dog!
Say, how would you like to work for me?

308
00:16:56,515 --> 00:17:00,349
-Sir, we could start him off in Sector 7G.
-7G?

309
00:17:00,452 --> 00:17:03,444
Let the Lennys and the Carls of the world
waste their wretched lives

310
00:17:03,555 --> 00:17:05,648
in that testicle-shriveling torture chamber.

311
00:17:05,758 --> 00:17:09,717
Son, you'll be working in sector 6F!

312
00:17:11,063 --> 00:17:12,052
LlSA: Aha!

313
00:17:12,164 --> 00:17:14,064
So Dad's life would've been the same!

314
00:17:14,166 --> 00:17:16,361
He would've married Mom
and worked for Mr. Burns.

315
00:17:16,468 --> 00:17:17,799
It would've been a push.

316
00:17:17,903 --> 00:17:21,168
-Can you keep her quiet?
-Not even when she's snorkeling.

317
00:17:21,273 --> 00:17:23,867
I was describing beautiful fish, Bart!

318
00:17:23,976 --> 00:17:24,943
(COOK SlGHS)

319
00:17:33,018 --> 00:17:34,349
(WHlSTLlNG)

320
00:17:35,921 --> 00:17:37,479
How you doing, Dad?

321
00:17:37,589 --> 00:17:40,057
I can't complain. And I never do.

322
00:17:40,159 --> 00:17:42,389
Thanks for letting me live
in your guesthouse.

323
00:17:48,367 --> 00:17:49,664
Honey, I'm home!

324
00:17:52,271 --> 00:17:53,238
Where are the kids?

325
00:17:53,338 --> 00:17:56,102
You used protection. We never had any.

326
00:17:57,476 --> 00:18:02,504
Well, that's what's missing. Our lives
would be horrible without the kids.

327
00:18:03,115 --> 00:18:06,516
Yes. That must be it.
This is the best of all possible worlds!

328
00:18:06,618 --> 00:18:07,880
Blah-blah-blah.

329
00:18:07,986 --> 00:18:09,715
I want to live in the sauce!

330
00:18:11,390 --> 00:18:14,985
If you could live in the sauce, don't you
think I would live in the sauce?

331
00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:16,061
(COOK SPEAKlNG lTALlAN)

332
00:18:18,130 --> 00:18:19,620
(SlGHS)

333
00:18:19,731 --> 00:18:23,098
-How long has he been there?
-I don't know. But he's algae-fying.

334
00:18:24,970 --> 00:18:27,962
-Homie, please come inside?
-Okay.

335
00:18:28,740 --> 00:18:29,729
(HOMER SlGHS)

336
00:18:29,842 --> 00:18:33,278
-Dad, we need to have a talk.
-I get it.

337
00:18:33,378 --> 00:18:37,280
You're all gonna try to convince me
that my life is great just like it is, right?

338
00:18:37,382 --> 00:18:40,749
Are you kidding? We couldn't even
convince you that Bruce Wayne is Batman!

339
00:18:40,853 --> 00:18:43,151
Come on! That millionaire playboy?

340
00:18:43,255 --> 00:18:45,416
He's too busy socializing
at cocktail parties

341
00:18:45,524 --> 00:18:47,719
and managing the affairs
of the Wayne Foundation!

342
00:18:47,826 --> 00:18:49,794
Don't open this one again.

343
00:18:49,895 --> 00:18:52,056
(WHlSPERlNG) Why does he think
Alfred's friends with Batman?

344
00:18:52,164 --> 00:18:53,495
Just stop!

345
00:18:53,599 --> 00:18:56,397
Dad, we think the sauce had it all wrong.

346
00:18:57,002 --> 00:18:59,698
Look who thinks he's smarter than sauce.

347
00:19:00,772 --> 00:19:04,799
Sweetheart, I think you'd feel better
after we take a little walk.

348
00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:07,840
HOMER: Why would you bring me here?

349
00:19:07,946 --> 00:19:10,141
It's like bringing Richard Nixon
to the Watergate,

350
00:19:10,249 --> 00:19:12,376
or Kevin Costner to Waterworld.

351
00:19:12,484 --> 00:19:14,008
Really?

352
00:19:15,521 --> 00:19:17,989
(GASPS) My own plaque!

353
00:19:18,090 --> 00:19:21,582
And one for Vice President Butthead!
Cool!

354
00:19:21,693 --> 00:19:24,457
Is that why you brought me here, spirits?

355
00:19:24,563 --> 00:19:26,793
Yep. In the future, people will look at this

356
00:19:26,899 --> 00:19:30,665
and they'll say,
"Whoever he was, he must've mattered."

357
00:19:30,769 --> 00:19:32,760
I guess that would be nice.

358
00:19:32,871 --> 00:19:36,034
Pardon me. Can my son
have his picture taken with you?

359
00:19:36,141 --> 00:19:37,802
Really? Sure.

360
00:19:40,445 --> 00:19:44,108
Dad, do you think
I could be elected class president?

361
00:19:44,216 --> 00:19:46,776
Well, we can't all be Homer Simpson, son.

362
00:19:47,719 --> 00:19:49,152
Thanks, guys.

363
00:19:49,721 --> 00:19:52,349
Hey, was there another plaque
here before?

364
00:19:52,457 --> 00:19:54,425
Plaques come, plaques go.

365
00:19:58,630 --> 00:20:00,325
Now let's get something to eat!

366
00:20:00,432 --> 00:20:03,094
-How about ltalian?
-God, no!

367
00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:04,726
I hear there's a Korean barbecue place

368
00:20:04,836 --> 00:20:06,895
where the beef spells out
the date of your death.

369
00:20:07,005 --> 00:20:08,336
Whoo! That sounds like fun!

370
00:21:01,860 --> 00:21:02,827
ENGLlSH - US - SDH