1
00:00:04,867 --> 00:00:06,539
Sideshow Bob's Last Gleaming

2
00:00:31,027 --> 00:00:32,506
I'd like to thank everybody...

3
00:00:32,707 --> 00:00:35,301
...who contributed
to Krusty's Kanned Food Drive.

4
00:00:35,507 --> 00:00:37,179
Your generous donations...

5
00:00:37,387 --> 00:00:43,417
...have made this our slipperiest,
slimiest Slobstacle Course ever!

6
00:00:44,307 --> 00:00:46,343
Our contestants will drop
out of my nose...

7
00:00:46,547 --> 00:00:49,015
...and blurp into a tub
of refried beans.

8
00:00:51,147 --> 00:00:55,538
From there they'll stumble down
a sluice of rich, eggy béarnaise sauce.

9
00:00:55,747 --> 00:00:59,342
How can we afford it? It's rancid!

10
00:00:59,547 --> 00:01:02,778
And at the finish line,
a scrumptious parfait of pudding...

11
00:01:02,987 --> 00:01:04,545
...pickle brine and detergent...

12
00:01:04,747 --> 00:01:09,343
...where a writhing pile of kids
will grope blindly for hot dogs.

13
00:01:09,547 --> 00:01:11,742
Krusty, please. It burns.

14
00:01:14,187 --> 00:01:17,065
Just think, Lis. That's our pickle brine
burning Sideshow Mel.

15
00:01:17,267 --> 00:01:19,542
That Sideshow Mel
thinks he's so big.

16
00:01:19,747 --> 00:01:21,624
What ever happened to Sideshow Bob?

17
00:01:21,827 --> 00:01:23,146
Don't you remember, Dad?

18
00:01:23,347 --> 00:01:24,905
He framed Krusty...

19
00:01:25,107 --> 00:01:26,825
...he tried to kill Aunt Selma...

20
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...he rigged an election.

21
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And he tried to murder me!

22
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Oh, yeah.

23
00:01:32,547 --> 00:01:35,345
But what I'll mainly
remember is the laughter.

24
00:01:35,547 --> 00:01:36,980
I wonder what he's doing now?

25
00:01:40,067 --> 00:01:41,500
Westminster Abbey.

26
00:01:41,707 --> 00:01:44,585
Edward the Confessor himself
could not have done better.

27
00:01:44,787 --> 00:01:48,780
Now to set the clocks
to Greenwich Mean Time.

28
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My dear Abbey!

29
00:01:56,307 --> 00:01:59,583
This is the way we mop the floor
Mop the floor, mop the floor

30
00:01:59,787 --> 00:02:03,700
Oh, must you bray night and day
at that infernal television?

31
00:02:03,907 --> 00:02:05,738
- Oh, look who's talking.
- Yeah, Bob.

32
00:02:05,947 --> 00:02:08,859
- You used to be on this show.
- Don't remind me.

33
00:02:09,067 --> 00:02:11,262
My foolish capering destroyed
more young minds...

34
00:02:11,467 --> 00:02:13,981
...than syphilis and pinball combined.

35
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Oh, how I loathe that box.

36
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That omni-directional sludge pump.
Droning and burping...

37
00:02:21,867 --> 00:02:24,745
Look here! That's enough now!
I own 60 percent of that network!

38
00:02:24,947 --> 00:02:27,700
All right, break it up, boys.
It's time for work detail.

39
00:02:28,427 --> 00:02:31,225
I suppose you don't like
tabloid newspapers either.

40
00:02:37,667 --> 00:02:41,546
There. That's the last
condom wrapper.

41
00:02:44,867 --> 00:02:47,825
I renew my objection
to this pointless endeavor.

42
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Informally now and by affidavit later.

43
00:02:50,147 --> 00:02:51,865
- Time permitting.
- Shut your word-hole.

44
00:02:52,067 --> 00:02:54,456
We gotta get this place clean
for the air show.

45
00:02:54,667 --> 00:02:55,895
Air show?

46
00:02:56,107 --> 00:02:59,417
Buzz-cut Alabamians spewing
colored smoke from their whiz jets...

47
00:02:59,627 --> 00:03:02,664
...to the strains of
"Rock You Like a Hurricane"?

48
00:03:02,867 --> 00:03:06,621
What kind of country-fried rube
is still impressed by that?

49
00:03:07,627 --> 00:03:10,095
- Yeah!
- That is so cool!

50
00:03:10,307 --> 00:03:12,104
- Yeah!
- Yeah.

51
00:03:12,307 --> 00:03:14,582
I wanna meet the first
female stealth bomber pilot.

52
00:03:14,787 --> 00:03:16,664
In the Gulf War
she destroyed 70 mosques...

53
00:03:16,867 --> 00:03:18,095
...and her name is Lisa too.

54
00:03:18,307 --> 00:03:21,185
I wanna see birds get sucked
into the engines. Rare ones.

55
00:03:21,387 --> 00:03:24,538
This year I'm making ear plugs
out of biscuit dough.

56
00:03:24,747 --> 00:03:26,942
They're ready.

57
00:03:28,947 --> 00:03:31,859
So weary.

58
00:03:37,067 --> 00:03:40,616
Grandma?
This is my friend, Craig.

59
00:03:41,547 --> 00:03:44,186
Friend? You mean you two
aren't knocking boots?

60
00:03:46,107 --> 00:03:49,099
Ever do the backseat mambo, Craigie?

61
00:03:49,307 --> 00:03:50,740
I know that voice.

62
00:03:50,947 --> 00:03:54,940
TV's bottomless chum bucket
has claimed Vanessa Redgrave.

63
00:03:55,147 --> 00:03:59,140
Now I'm gonna haul ass
to Lollapalooza.

64
00:04:01,267 --> 00:04:04,225
Farewell, dear Nessa.

65
00:04:09,347 --> 00:04:12,942
Hey, you! The state's not paying you
five cents an hour to stand around.

66
00:04:13,147 --> 00:04:15,536
- Now, get busy!
- Oh, I'll get busy.

67
00:04:15,747 --> 00:04:18,739
I'll get very busy indeed.

68
00:04:24,747 --> 00:04:26,305
You still got it, Bob.

69
00:04:28,267 --> 00:04:30,144
Way to guard the parking lot,
top gun.

70
00:04:30,347 --> 00:04:32,065
I have three medals for this.

71
00:04:35,387 --> 00:04:38,743
Where is Sideshow Bob and that guy
who eats people and takes their faces?

72
00:04:38,947 --> 00:04:40,426
I'm right here, chief.

73
00:04:40,627 --> 00:04:43,221
- Then where's Sideshow Bob?
- He ran off.

74
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Oh, great.

75
00:04:44,867 --> 00:04:49,224
Well, if anyone asks,
I beat him to death, okay?

76
00:04:49,427 --> 00:04:51,179
Right.

77
00:04:56,787 --> 00:04:58,903
I would like to direct your attention...

78
00:04:59,107 --> 00:05:01,575
...to the air vehicle
next to which I am standing.

79
00:05:01,787 --> 00:05:05,541
The Harrier Jet is one of our more
dollar-intensive ordnance delivery vectors.

80
00:05:05,747 --> 00:05:07,977
Five tires? Am I seeing things?

81
00:05:08,187 --> 00:05:12,021
And although it looks complicated,
it is so well designed, a child could fly it.

82
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- Can I fly it?
- Of course you cannot.

83
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Free Duff?

84
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Viva life!

85
00:05:35,947 --> 00:05:39,019
Take that, Mom! Take that, Dad!

86
00:05:39,227 --> 00:05:41,661
Send me to a psychiatrist, will you?

87
00:05:42,587 --> 00:05:45,659
Take that, Dr. Sally Waxler!

88
00:05:51,587 --> 00:05:54,385
Colonel, they're expecting you
at the podium in 10 minutes.

89
00:05:54,587 --> 00:05:56,942
Yeah, well...

90
00:06:09,907 --> 00:06:12,296
What in the World According to Garp?

91
00:06:12,507 --> 00:06:14,463
Those are my dress towels!

92
00:06:15,667 --> 00:06:17,498
Who's in my private washroom?

93
00:06:17,707 --> 00:06:19,220
McGuckett, let me in.

94
00:06:19,427 --> 00:06:22,021
- The door already is closed.
- What?

95
00:06:22,227 --> 00:06:24,661
This is Colonel Leslie "Hap" Hapablap.

96
00:06:24,867 --> 00:06:26,220
If you don't open that door...

97
00:06:26,427 --> 00:06:29,225
...I'll tear you up
like a Kleenex at a snot party!

98
00:06:29,427 --> 00:06:32,783
- You say you're in the military?
- Sweet Enola Gay, son!

99
00:06:32,987 --> 00:06:34,943
I'm gonna come in there
and corpse you up.

100
00:06:35,147 --> 00:06:37,900
Corpse you up and mail you to mama!

101
00:06:39,547 --> 00:06:42,619
Well, where did he go?

102
00:06:43,827 --> 00:06:47,342
Got my knuckles
all lined up for nothing.

103
00:06:48,427 --> 00:06:50,019
Sorry, ladies.

104
00:06:54,507 --> 00:06:56,862
Look at that hunk of junk.

105
00:06:58,067 --> 00:06:59,341
You're ignorant.

106
00:06:59,547 --> 00:07:01,219
That's the Wright Brothers' plane.

107
00:07:01,427 --> 00:07:03,258
At Kitty Hawk, in 1903...

108
00:07:03,467 --> 00:07:07,983
...Charles Lindbergh flew it 15 miles
on a thimbleful of corn oil.

109
00:07:08,187 --> 00:07:10,542
Single-handedly won us
the Civil War, it did.

110
00:07:10,747 --> 00:07:12,544
How do you know
so much about history?

111
00:07:12,747 --> 00:07:15,420
I pieced it together,
mostly from sugar packets.

112
00:07:19,787 --> 00:07:21,425
- Authorization code?
- Code?

113
00:07:21,627 --> 00:07:23,583
Son, this is Colonel Hapablap!

114
00:07:23,787 --> 00:07:27,302
That fool McGuckett sprayed runway
foam all over Chuck Yeager's Acura.

115
00:07:27,507 --> 00:07:29,463
Get down there
with the chamois triple-time!

116
00:07:29,667 --> 00:07:32,306
- Colonel, I'm under strict orders...
- Sweet Enola Gay, son!

117
00:07:32,507 --> 00:07:35,863
Get moving, or I'll tear
you up like a Kleenex at a...

118
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...snot party.
- Sir, right away, sir!

119
00:07:45,627 --> 00:07:47,902
They didn't have aspirin,
so I got you cigarettes.

120
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Maybe my headache will go away
once the show starts.

121
00:07:54,827 --> 00:07:56,101
Ladies and gentlemen...

122
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...what a day for an air show!

123
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Not a cloud in the sky!

124
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Except, perhaps, a mushroom cloud.

125
00:08:16,467 --> 00:08:17,422
Oh, forget it.

126
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- Who "slipped the surly bonds of earth
and touched the face of God."

127
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To fly!

128
00:08:27,547 --> 00:08:30,903
A dream of man
and flightless bird alike.

129
00:08:31,107 --> 00:08:33,621
And now, hold on tight...

130
00:08:33,827 --> 00:08:38,855
...as we blast through the thrilling
highlights of aviation history!

131
00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:45,100
- Say, did somebody say, "Box kites"?
- No!

132
00:08:48,107 --> 00:08:53,306
The common box kite was originally
used as a means of drying wet string.

133
00:09:04,507 --> 00:09:09,058
Do they have to play that rock music?
Every note is pounding into my skull.

134
00:09:14,627 --> 00:09:17,425
Anybody out there
feel the need for speed?

135
00:09:17,627 --> 00:09:19,538
- Yeah!
- Yeah.

136
00:09:19,747 --> 00:09:23,376
Then get ready for the pride
of the United States Air Force.

137
00:09:23,587 --> 00:09:26,738
The British-made Harrier Jump Jets!

138
00:09:29,867 --> 00:09:32,301
Dad, why aren't you looking?

139
00:09:32,507 --> 00:09:34,577
Why jerk my neck
around like a goon...

140
00:09:34,787 --> 00:09:37,347
...when Tyranno-Vision decides
what I should look at.

141
00:09:37,547 --> 00:09:40,345
Look, it's Maggie.

142
00:09:41,067 --> 00:09:44,503
- Hey, Maggie?
- Sideshow Bob!

143
00:09:46,107 --> 00:09:47,381
Hello, Springfield.

144
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:52,138
Sorry to divert your attention
from all the big noises and shiny things...

145
00:09:52,347 --> 00:09:54,463
...but something's
been troubling me lately:

146
00:09:54,667 --> 00:09:55,895
Television!

147
00:09:56,107 --> 00:10:00,100
Wouldn't our lives be so much richer
if television were done away with?

148
00:10:00,307 --> 00:10:03,379
- What?
- Surely he's not talking about VH1.

149
00:10:03,587 --> 00:10:08,342
Why, we could revive the lost arts
of conversation and scrimshaw.

150
00:10:08,547 --> 00:10:12,699
Thus I submit to you
we abolish television permanently.

151
00:10:12,907 --> 00:10:15,262
Go back to Massachusetts, pinko!

152
00:10:15,467 --> 00:10:18,743
Oh, and one more thing.
I've stolen a nuclear weapon.

153
00:10:18,947 --> 00:10:24,021
If you do not rid this city of television
within two hours, I will detonate it.

154
00:10:24,227 --> 00:10:26,297
Farewell.

155
00:10:28,147 --> 00:10:31,617
By the way, I'm aware of the irony
of appearing on TV in order to decry it...

156
00:10:31,827 --> 00:10:34,102
...so don’t bother pointing that out.

157
00:10:36,107 --> 00:10:38,575
Everything's gonna be okay!
Don't panic! Don't panic!

158
00:10:38,787 --> 00:10:41,824
Mom, Mom! You're stepping
on my heels and knocking my shoes off!

159
00:10:42,027 --> 00:10:43,983
We can always get more shoes.
Move, move!

160
00:10:46,347 --> 00:10:48,303
Stamp your hand for re-entry.

161
00:10:50,547 --> 00:10:52,185
Hey.

162
00:10:52,387 --> 00:10:55,982
Cool. I wanna be around
when those guns start going off.

163
00:10:56,187 --> 00:10:57,666
Bart, no!

164
00:10:58,987 --> 00:11:00,739
Wait! Wait!
My children are in there!

165
00:11:00,947 --> 00:11:03,586
You must be very proud, ma'am.

166
00:11:06,027 --> 00:11:08,746
Our city will not negotiate
with terrorists.

167
00:11:08,947 --> 00:11:11,825
- Is there a city nearby that will?
- No need, sir.

168
00:11:12,027 --> 00:11:15,417
We'll find that head case
faster than Garfield finds lasagna.

169
00:11:16,387 --> 00:11:20,096
Oh, sorry. My wife thought
that was gangbusters.

170
00:11:25,707 --> 00:11:28,460
This elevator only goes
to the basement...

171
00:11:28,667 --> 00:11:31,977
...and someone made
an awful mess down there.

172
00:11:35,827 --> 00:11:37,260
Watch out! He's got his probe!

173
00:11:42,347 --> 00:11:43,780
Bart! Bart!

174
00:11:43,987 --> 00:11:46,182
What are you doing?
We've gotta get out of here.

175
00:11:46,387 --> 00:11:49,265
Target sighted.
Launching air-to-nerd missile.

176
00:11:49,467 --> 00:11:51,662
Come on! Mom and Dad are waiting!

177
00:11:51,867 --> 00:11:53,539
Bob is not here.

178
00:11:53,747 --> 00:11:56,386
We have searched
every square inch of this base...

179
00:11:56,587 --> 00:12:00,819
...and all we have found
is porno, porno, porno!

180
00:12:01,027 --> 00:12:02,506
We have only 20 minutes left.

181
00:12:02,707 --> 00:12:05,062
Send in the esteemed
representatives of television.

182
00:12:09,387 --> 00:12:12,584
Hey, hey!
Now this is my kind of meeting.

183
00:12:12,787 --> 00:12:16,541
Gentlemen, it's time we faced up
to the un-face-up-to-able.

184
00:12:16,747 --> 00:12:21,138
We must sacrifice television in order
to save the lives of our townspeople.

185
00:12:23,667 --> 00:12:25,544
Let's not go nuts.

186
00:12:25,747 --> 00:12:28,944
Would it really be worth living
in a world without television?

187
00:12:29,147 --> 00:12:32,378
I think the survivors
would envy the dead.

188
00:12:34,067 --> 00:12:36,820
I appreciate your passion
on behalf of your medium...

189
00:12:37,027 --> 00:12:39,336
...but I'm afraid we're out of options.

190
00:12:39,547 --> 00:12:41,583
Television must go.

191
00:12:41,787 --> 00:12:44,938
May God have mercy on our souls.

192
00:12:51,347 --> 00:12:53,144
As my final newscast
draws to a close...

193
00:12:53,347 --> 00:12:55,861
...I'm reminded of events
that brought me closer to you.

194
00:12:56,067 --> 00:12:59,184
The collapse of the Soviet Union,
premium ice cream price wars...

195
00:12:59,387 --> 00:13:01,662
...dogs that were issued
major credit cards...

196
00:13:01,867 --> 00:13:03,823
...and others who weren't so lucky.

197
00:13:04,027 --> 00:13:06,541
And so farewell.

198
00:13:06,747 --> 00:13:10,820
And don’t forget to look for my new
column in PC World magazine.

199
00:13:22,067 --> 00:13:25,184
Success! They're giving in!

200
00:13:25,387 --> 00:13:29,175
Blast! I should've made
more demands.

201
00:13:29,387 --> 00:13:32,504
Some decent local marmalade, for one.
Oh, well, next time.

202
00:13:33,347 --> 00:13:34,746
Not my extendo-glove!

203
00:13:34,947 --> 00:13:37,177
Oh, they haven't made those
since the war.

204
00:13:37,387 --> 00:13:39,617
Oh, not my Paris backdrop!

205
00:13:39,827 --> 00:13:42,705
How am I gonna make fun
of the frogs?

206
00:13:45,387 --> 00:13:50,415
Wait. If I could only stay on the air,
I'd have 100 percent of the audience.

207
00:13:50,627 --> 00:13:52,697
Think of the ratings.

208
00:13:55,147 --> 00:13:56,899
Okay, so we can't go over the fence.

209
00:13:57,107 --> 00:13:58,381
I feel so helpless.

210
00:13:58,587 --> 00:14:01,818
- What if something happens to them?
- I'm sure they're fine, honey.

211
00:14:02,667 --> 00:14:05,465
Well, at least they're wearing
clean underwear.

212
00:14:09,107 --> 00:14:10,825
Free and easy, Lis.

213
00:14:11,027 --> 00:14:15,179
There's nothing like an unfurnished
basement for pure comfort.

214
00:14:15,387 --> 00:14:17,821
Hurry up. Mom and Dad
are probably worried sick.

215
00:14:19,227 --> 00:14:21,787
Do you know what really
frosts my Kelvinator?

216
00:14:21,987 --> 00:14:25,343
That fruit-cup's probably still laughing
at us from his damn hidey-hole.

217
00:14:25,547 --> 00:14:27,583
I'd rather take an order
from Bill Clinton...

218
00:14:27,787 --> 00:14:30,381
...than hear that guy's snooty,
high-toned voice again.

219
00:14:30,587 --> 00:14:32,418
High-toned voice.

220
00:14:32,627 --> 00:14:33,980
Bart, that's it.

221
00:14:34,187 --> 00:14:35,905
I know where Sideshow Bob is hiding.

222
00:14:37,267 --> 00:14:40,304
When Bob broadcast that message,
his voice was higher than normal.

223
00:14:40,507 --> 00:14:42,225
And what makes your voice high?

224
00:14:42,427 --> 00:14:44,702
- Tight, binding underwear?
- Helium.

225
00:14:44,907 --> 00:14:47,979
Sideshow Bob is in the Duff blimp.

226
00:14:49,067 --> 00:14:54,221
All Springfield trembles before
the might of Sideshow Bob.

227
00:14:54,427 --> 00:14:56,782
Blasted helium.

228
00:14:58,747 --> 00:15:00,226
That's better.

229
00:15:00,427 --> 00:15:03,817
Gone. Gone too. Fabulous. Marvelous.

230
00:15:04,787 --> 00:15:06,584
This is the emergency
broadcast system.

231
00:15:06,787 --> 00:15:08,345
Stand by for an urgent bulletin.

232
00:15:08,547 --> 00:15:09,662
Hey, hey!

233
00:15:11,347 --> 00:15:13,497
Krusty the Clown is back on the air!

234
00:15:13,707 --> 00:15:16,221
Eight... No, no, 12 hours a day.

235
00:15:16,427 --> 00:15:18,338
The only game in town.

236
00:15:18,547 --> 00:15:20,822
Krusty! But how?

237
00:15:21,027 --> 00:15:23,018
Coming at you from
the civil-defense shack...

238
00:15:23,227 --> 00:15:27,061
...in the remote Alkali Flats
of the Springfield badlands.

239
00:15:27,267 --> 00:15:30,179
I'll be beaming
out 11 watts of wackiness.

240
00:15:30,387 --> 00:15:33,265
Hour after hour of unscripted,
unrehearsed comedy.

241
00:15:33,467 --> 00:15:35,901
Featuring...

242
00:15:36,107 --> 00:15:37,586
...Professor Gas Can!

243
00:15:37,787 --> 00:15:41,666
And former president Ike Eisenhower!

244
00:15:41,867 --> 00:15:43,858
Let's get busy.

245
00:15:44,067 --> 00:15:47,582
Oh, my utopia lies in ruins.

246
00:15:47,787 --> 00:15:50,142
How naive of me to think
a mere atom bomb...

247
00:15:50,347 --> 00:15:53,862
...could fell the chattering cyclops.

248
00:15:59,747 --> 00:16:03,183
- Well, at least I'll have my revenge.
- Bob, no!

249
00:16:03,907 --> 00:16:06,546
Don't you see? That would be
taking the easy way out.

250
00:16:06,747 --> 00:16:08,419
I agree.

251
00:16:27,027 --> 00:16:29,143
"Best before November, 1959."

252
00:16:29,347 --> 00:16:32,225
Damn it, Bob! There were plenty
of brand-new bombs...

253
00:16:32,427 --> 00:16:34,861
...but you had to go for that
retro '50s charm.

254
00:16:36,907 --> 00:16:40,422
Well, if it isn't my arch nemesis,
Bart Simpson.

255
00:16:40,627 --> 00:16:43,221
And his sister, Lisa,
to whom I'm fairly indifferent.

256
00:16:43,427 --> 00:16:45,224
So Krusty double-crossed you.

257
00:16:45,427 --> 00:16:48,100
But your basic plan was pure genius.

258
00:16:48,307 --> 00:16:51,902
- Where do you get your ideas?
- Oh, please.

259
00:16:52,107 --> 00:16:53,460
Let's not embarrass us both...

260
00:16:53,667 --> 00:16:58,104
...with that hoary old
stall-the-villain-with-flattery scheme.

261
00:16:58,307 --> 00:17:01,219
I should have known
you were too smart to fall for that.

262
00:17:01,427 --> 00:17:03,622
Really? What type of smart?
Book smart?

263
00:17:03,827 --> 00:17:07,263
A lot of people are book smart,
but it takes a special type of genius...

264
00:17:07,467 --> 00:17:08,866
All right, Bob, it's over.

265
00:17:09,067 --> 00:17:10,546
Come out with your hands up.

266
00:17:10,747 --> 00:17:12,100
No!

267
00:17:12,307 --> 00:17:13,706
How did they find me?

268
00:17:29,547 --> 00:17:31,742
He's getting away!

269
00:17:34,347 --> 00:17:35,700
Oh, not the Harrier!

270
00:17:35,907 --> 00:17:37,260
We've got a war tomorrow.

271
00:17:37,467 --> 00:17:40,061
God bless the idiot-proof Air Force.

272
00:17:45,627 --> 00:17:47,458
They're gone!

273
00:17:48,787 --> 00:17:51,301
Hell, not the Wright Brothers' plane.

274
00:17:51,507 --> 00:17:54,021
The Smithsonian's gonna
have my ass on a platter.

275
00:17:57,227 --> 00:18:00,185
Dad! Help!

276
00:18:01,867 --> 00:18:04,825
Hang on, boy!
Daddy's coming to save you!

277
00:18:07,707 --> 00:18:09,379
Mom, I found
Sideshow Bob's hideout...

278
00:18:09,587 --> 00:18:12,147
...got a message to the police,
had a blimp fall on me...

279
00:18:12,347 --> 00:18:14,736
...and I was in an atomic blast,
but I'm okay now.

280
00:18:14,947 --> 00:18:17,415
Well, I wrecked a gate,
but you don't hear me bragging.

281
00:18:17,627 --> 00:18:18,855
Now, let's roll!

282
00:18:24,067 --> 00:18:27,025
Ah, for the days when aviation
was a gentleman's pursuit.

283
00:18:27,227 --> 00:18:30,663
Back before every Joe Sweat Sock could
wedge himself behind a lunch tray...

284
00:18:30,867 --> 00:18:33,540
...and jet off to Raleigh-Durham.

285
00:18:33,747 --> 00:18:36,261
Are you getting lots of bugs
in your mouth too?

286
00:18:36,467 --> 00:18:38,185
Yes.

287
00:18:40,227 --> 00:18:41,740
Prepare to engage enemy.

288
00:18:43,147 --> 00:18:45,138
Bogie's speed not sufficient
for intercept.

289
00:18:45,347 --> 00:18:46,621
Suggest we get out and walk.

290
00:18:53,907 --> 00:18:55,738
Jump, boy! I got you!

291
00:18:55,947 --> 00:18:58,017
I'm coming!

292
00:19:04,707 --> 00:19:05,935
Now you, boy.

293
00:19:07,267 --> 00:19:10,657
You can't escape. The tennis rackets
don't get you, the pool skimmers will.

294
00:19:10,867 --> 00:19:13,381
Oh, I never planned to escape.

295
00:19:13,587 --> 00:19:15,623
You see, this is a kamikaze mission.

296
00:19:15,827 --> 00:19:20,025
You and I are going to kill
Krusty the Clown!

297
00:19:25,187 --> 00:19:27,337
Kids, Itchy and Scratchy
can’t be here today.

298
00:19:27,547 --> 00:19:30,345
But instead,
we've got the next best thing.

299
00:19:30,547 --> 00:19:33,015
It's The Stingy and Battery Show!

300
00:19:33,227 --> 00:19:37,186
They bite, and light,
and bite and light and bite...

301
00:19:37,387 --> 00:19:39,662
You know what I'm talking about.

302
00:19:41,027 --> 00:19:43,302
You can't kill Krusty.
He made you what you are.

303
00:19:43,507 --> 00:19:45,737
Without him,
you wouldn't be called "Sideshow."

304
00:19:50,227 --> 00:19:51,580
What is that? A lawnmower?

305
00:19:53,947 --> 00:19:55,778
Get out of the way, Krusty!

306
00:20:03,547 --> 00:20:05,424
What is the freaking holdup?

307
00:20:06,547 --> 00:20:08,742
Die, Krusty!

308
00:20:08,947 --> 00:20:10,062
Die!

309
00:20:15,267 --> 00:20:16,666
Sorry.

310
00:20:16,867 --> 00:20:19,381
We don't normally
drive these in the Air Force.

311
00:20:20,067 --> 00:20:23,025
Gotcha, you TV-hating mutant.

312
00:20:23,227 --> 00:20:25,821
What is your major malfunction,
Sideshow Bob?

313
00:20:27,707 --> 00:20:28,935
My little sugar bun.

314
00:20:30,347 --> 00:20:32,736
I'm so glad you're safe.

315
00:20:33,547 --> 00:20:37,062
Mom! You're embarrassing
me in front of the Army guys.

316
00:20:37,267 --> 00:20:38,495
How ironic.

317
00:20:38,707 --> 00:20:42,302
My crusade against television
has come to an end so formulaic...

318
00:20:42,507 --> 00:20:44,498
...it could have spewed
from the PowerBook...

319
00:20:44,707 --> 00:20:47,016
...of the laziest Hollywood hack.

320
00:20:50,107 --> 00:20:51,335
Hey, everybody.

321
00:20:51,547 --> 00:20:54,584
I'm gonna haul ass to Lollapalooza!

322
00:20:54,787 --> 00:20:57,381
Here we go again.

323
00:21:48,067 --> 00:21:50,023
Subtitles by
SDI Media Group

324
00:21:50,227 --> 00:21:52,183
[ENGLISH]