1 00:00:04,329 --> 00:00:07,560 ## The Simpsons ## 2 00:01:05,390 --> 00:01:07,358 D'oh! 3 00:01:23,174 --> 00:01:25,301 COPS: In Springfield. 4 00:01:52,604 --> 00:01:56,665 All right, boys, time to bag us a cattle rustler. 5 00:01:58,643 --> 00:02:01,510 What in God's name Are you doing? 6 00:02:01,613 --> 00:02:04,207 Isn't this 742 Evergreen Terrace? 7 00:02:04,316 --> 00:02:06,341 No, that's next door. 8 00:02:11,323 --> 00:02:15,020 Close, but no doughnut, cops. 9 00:02:15,126 --> 00:02:18,118 This is Papa Bear. Put out an A.P.B. for a male suspect... 10 00:02:18,229 --> 00:02:21,596 driving a... car of some sort... 11 00:02:21,700 --> 00:02:24,134 heading in the direction of, uh... 12 00:02:24,235 --> 00:02:26,294 you know, that place that sells chili. 13 00:02:26,404 --> 00:02:27,496 Suspect is hatless. Repeat, hatless. 14 00:02:33,712 --> 00:02:35,737 Honey, you really shouldn't eat so much in bed. 15 00:02:35,847 --> 00:02:38,338 It's not good for your heart. 16 00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:41,647 My heart is just f-- 17 00:02:41,753 --> 00:02:45,849 - Homie, what is it? -Just workin' the turkey through. 18 00:02:47,258 --> 00:02:49,158 There it goes! 19 00:02:52,497 --> 00:02:55,523 Hey, Lise, there was a big train wreck last night. Do you wanna see the victims? 20 00:02:55,633 --> 00:02:58,124 - Hmm, okay. - Yaah! 21 00:02:58,236 --> 00:03:02,798 - Bart, that's gross! - You're right. Let's bury them at sea. Bleah! 22 00:03:02,907 --> 00:03:07,207 Da-a-d! 23 00:03:07,312 --> 00:03:10,145 - What's wrong? - You know that feeling you get... 24 00:03:10,248 --> 00:03:14,014 when a thousand knives of fire are stabbing you in the heart? 25 00:03:14,119 --> 00:03:16,679 I got that right now. 26 00:03:16,788 --> 00:03:19,052 Ooh! Bacon! 27 00:03:19,157 --> 00:03:21,921 Homer, I prepared a special Surprise just for you. 28 00:03:22,027 --> 00:03:24,086 It could only be one thing. 29 00:03:26,131 --> 00:03:29,862 Psst! The best meat's in the rump. 30 00:03:29,968 --> 00:03:32,027 - Here you go. - What the hell is this? 31 00:03:32,137 --> 00:03:35,698 - Nice, healthy oatmeal. - Ooh, oatmeal. 32 00:03:35,807 --> 00:03:39,573 What a delightful treat. Oh, there's a bug in it. 33 00:03:39,677 --> 00:03:42,373 - No, there isn't. - Trust me. 34 00:03:46,484 --> 00:03:48,679 Dad, there's a bug on that. 35 00:03:48,787 --> 00:03:50,812 Eh. 36 00:03:57,128 --> 00:03:59,221 Come on, come on! 37 00:04:06,237 --> 00:04:10,799 Oh, dear. Now you've done it. 38 00:04:18,817 --> 00:04:21,843 I keep hearing this horrible irregular thumping noise. 39 00:04:23,955 --> 00:04:26,924 It's your heart. And I think it's on its last thump. 40 00:04:27,025 --> 00:04:30,290 Whew! I was afraid it was my transmission. 41 00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:32,295 Hey, where's he goin'? 42 00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:35,389 Billy, remember that old Plymouth We just couldn't fix? 43 00:04:35,500 --> 00:04:40,597 - We're gonna sell him to Mr. Nikapopolus? - You're a dull boy, Billy. 44 00:04:42,640 --> 00:04:46,906 Look at that pig stuffing his face with doughnuts on my time! 45 00:04:47,011 --> 00:04:50,105 That's right. Keep eating. 46 00:04:50,215 --> 00:04:53,946 Little do you know you're drawing ever closer to the poisoned doughnut. 47 00:04:54,052 --> 00:04:57,453 There is a poisoned one-- isn't there, Smithers? 48 00:04:57,555 --> 00:05:01,355 Uh, no, sir. I discussed this with our lawyers. They consider it murder. 49 00:05:01,459 --> 00:05:03,689 Damn their oily hides! 50 00:05:06,131 --> 00:05:08,031 Bring him to me! 51 00:05:09,467 --> 00:05:13,528 Relax, Simpson. 52 00:05:13,638 --> 00:05:16,300 I just brought you in here for a friendly hello. 53 00:05:19,077 --> 00:05:21,170 And good-bye! You're fired! 54 00:05:21,279 --> 00:05:23,179 But wait. 55 00:05:23,281 --> 00:05:25,181 Perhaps I'm being Too hasty. 56 00:05:25,283 --> 00:05:27,979 You are highly skilled... 57 00:05:28,086 --> 00:05:30,213 at goofing off!. 58 00:05:30,321 --> 00:05:35,122 Now, don't worry, Homer. You're the kind of guy I could really dig... 59 00:05:35,226 --> 00:05:37,660 a grave for! 60 00:05:37,762 --> 00:05:40,060 Your indolence is inefficacious! 61 00:05:40,165 --> 00:05:42,133 Oh? 62 00:05:42,233 --> 00:05:44,133 That means you're terrible! 63 00:05:50,375 --> 00:05:52,775 Hmm? 64 00:05:52,877 --> 00:05:55,402 Mr. Burns, I think he's dead. 65 00:05:55,513 --> 00:05:58,641 Oh, dear. Send a ham to his widow. 66 00:05:58,750 --> 00:06:01,583 Mmm. Ham. 67 00:06:03,288 --> 00:06:05,256 No, wait. He's alive. 68 00:06:05,356 --> 00:06:07,984 - Oh, good. Cancel the ham. - D'oh! 69 00:06:16,167 --> 00:06:19,102 - Wow, look at that. How do they know to cross there? 70 00:06:30,014 --> 00:06:31,641 He was taking a bite, and his jaw locked. 71 00:06:31,749 --> 00:06:34,013 Hey, look. I can fit my entire fist in here. 72 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:36,782 Hey, hey, hey. Cut it out. 73 00:06:36,888 --> 00:06:38,651 - What's that, Chief? - Cut it out. 74 00:06:43,461 --> 00:06:46,624 Ooh. Buy three tubes of Mr. Blister... 75 00:06:46,731 --> 00:06:48,631 get one free. 76 00:06:48,733 --> 00:06:50,997 Hello. Yes. 77 00:06:51,102 --> 00:06:53,263 Oh, dear Lord! 78 00:06:53,371 --> 00:06:56,534 Homer's in the hospital! They think it's his heart! 79 00:06:56,641 --> 00:06:59,269 Oh, my God. 80 00:06:59,377 --> 00:07:03,575 - What? - Five cents off wax paper. 81 00:07:03,681 --> 00:07:05,581 Clear! 82 00:07:08,253 --> 00:07:10,153 More. 83 00:07:10,255 --> 00:07:12,883 Thank you. 84 00:07:12,991 --> 00:07:15,687 Oh, Homie, I was so frightened! 85 00:07:15,793 --> 00:07:19,593 Marge, my whole life flashed before my eyes. 86 00:07:19,697 --> 00:07:21,927 Ah, little Homer. 87 00:07:24,902 --> 00:07:27,564 How'd he get that? 88 00:07:38,316 --> 00:07:42,753 What a voice. Young Homer is going to make me a millionaire. 89 00:07:48,459 --> 00:07:50,427 Hey, my voice just changed. 90 00:07:54,866 --> 00:07:56,493 Dagnabbit! 91 00:07:56,601 --> 00:08:00,093 Mr. Simpson, I'm afraid you've just had a mild heart attack. 92 00:08:00,204 --> 00:08:02,229 But I'm out of the woods now, right? 93 00:08:02,340 --> 00:08:05,173 I mean, whatever doesn't kill me can only make me stronger. 94 00:08:05,276 --> 00:08:07,176 Oh, no. Quite the opposite. 95 00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:10,145 It's made you weak as a kitten. 96 00:08:10,248 --> 00:08:13,149 - Look! - Hey, come on. Quit it. 97 00:08:13,251 --> 00:08:16,152 - Coochy coochy coo! - Stop. Please stop. 98 00:08:16,254 --> 00:08:18,745 Oh, you swing like a girl. Come on, now. 99 00:08:18,856 --> 00:08:21,256 - Please have mercy. - Got your nose. 100 00:08:21,359 --> 00:08:23,259 Not funny. 101 00:08:23,361 --> 00:08:25,261 How 'bout this little bee? 102 00:08:25,363 --> 00:08:27,729 No! Oh! 103 00:08:27,832 --> 00:08:31,700 Remember your hippopotamus oath. 104 00:08:31,803 --> 00:08:35,239 - Can't you do something for him? - Well, we can't fix his heart... 105 00:08:35,340 --> 00:08:38,207 but we can tell you exactly how damaged it is. 106 00:08:38,343 --> 00:08:41,210 What an age we live in! 107 00:08:41,312 --> 00:08:44,281 Now, what you see here is the radioactive dye we injected... 108 00:08:44,382 --> 00:08:46,680 flowing through your husband's circulatory system. 109 00:08:46,784 --> 00:08:49,275 But, Doctor, I haven't injected the dye yet! 110 00:08:49,387 --> 00:08:52,254 - Good Lord. - Hi. 111 00:08:52,357 --> 00:08:54,825 Now, Homer, this is a new body fat analysis test. 112 00:08:54,926 --> 00:08:59,056 I start you jiggling and measure how long it takes to stop. 113 00:09:03,334 --> 00:09:05,894 Whoo-hoo! Look at that blubber fly! 114 00:09:06,003 --> 00:09:08,198 Yes. 115 00:09:08,306 --> 00:09:10,206 Nurse, cancel my 1 :00. 116 00:09:10,308 --> 00:09:14,404 Homer, I'm afraid you'll have to undergo a coronary bypass operation. 117 00:09:14,512 --> 00:09:18,141 - Say it in English, Doc. - You're going to need open-heart surgery. 118 00:09:18,249 --> 00:09:20,274 Spare me your medical mumbo jumbo. 119 00:09:20,385 --> 00:09:23,684 We're going to cut you open and tinker with your ticker. 120 00:09:23,788 --> 00:09:27,918 - Could you dumb it down a shade? - Doctor, we'll do whatever it takes to get my Homie well. 121 00:09:28,025 --> 00:09:30,721 Good. I must warn you though. 122 00:09:30,828 --> 00:09:34,559 This procedure will cost you upwards of... $30,000. 123 00:09:38,469 --> 00:09:41,529 I'm afraid it's now 40,000. 124 00:09:46,744 --> 00:09:50,373 Okay, Okay. We need $40,000. Now, how much do we have in the checkbook? 125 00:09:50,481 --> 00:09:53,143 - Seventy dollars. - Hmm. 126 00:09:53,251 --> 00:09:56,311 Have we deposited any $40,000 checks that haven't cleared yet? 127 00:09:56,421 --> 00:09:58,946 No. Don't you have health insurance at work? 128 00:09:59,056 --> 00:10:02,219 Well, actually, we gave it all up for a pinball machine in the lounge. 129 00:10:02,326 --> 00:10:04,453 - D'oh! - Don't worry, Marge. 130 00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:08,259 America's health care system is second only to Japan... 131 00:10:08,366 --> 00:10:12,132 Canada, Sweden, Great Britain-- well, all of Europe. 132 00:10:12,236 --> 00:10:15,967 But you can thank your lucky stars we don't live in Paraguay. 133 00:10:25,349 --> 00:10:28,978 Now, before we give you health insurance, I have to ask you a few questions. 134 00:10:29,086 --> 00:10:31,816 Questions? Questions? Oh! 135 00:10:31,923 --> 00:10:34,483 My whole scheme down the-- I mean, ask away. 136 00:10:34,592 --> 00:10:37,390 Oh, good. Now, under "heart attacks," 137 00:10:37,495 --> 00:10:39,486 you crossed out "3" and wrote "0." 138 00:10:39,597 --> 00:10:43,089 Oh, I thought that said "brain hemorrhages." 139 00:10:43,201 --> 00:10:46,034 Uh-huh. And, uh, do you drink? 140 00:10:46,137 --> 00:10:48,332 I do enjoy a snifter of port at Christmas. 141 00:10:48,439 --> 00:10:50,339 All right. Here's your policy. 142 00:10:50,441 --> 00:10:53,433 Now let me tell you something, Mr. Sucker. I just-- 143 00:10:53,544 --> 00:10:55,842 Oh, hold on there. Uh, you still have to sign it. 144 00:10:55,947 --> 00:10:59,007 Oh. I-- 145 00:10:59,116 --> 00:11:01,880 Must... sign... policy! 146 00:11:01,986 --> 00:11:03,920 Sir, I'm sorry. We can't insure you. 147 00:11:04,021 --> 00:11:06,285 - I made an "H." - No, that doesn't count. 148 00:11:06,390 --> 00:11:08,551 It's like an "X." 149 00:11:08,659 --> 00:11:10,650 Hey, we'd better get you to a hospital. 150 00:11:10,761 --> 00:11:13,195 - Can I have a free calendar? - Okay. 151 00:11:13,297 --> 00:11:15,492 Clear! 152 00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:21,038 Oh, Doctor, I was in a wonderful place filled with fire and brimstone. 153 00:11:21,138 --> 00:11:25,302 And there were all these guys in red pajamas sticking pitchforks in my butt. 154 00:11:25,409 --> 00:11:28,378 Mr. Simpson, you must get that operation as soon as possible. 155 00:11:28,479 --> 00:11:33,314 I can't afford it. Maybe I should buy one of those machines. 156 00:11:33,417 --> 00:11:36,386 Oh, yeah. That's the stuff. 157 00:11:36,487 --> 00:11:38,819 Now, I know I haven't been the best Christian. 158 00:11:38,923 --> 00:11:41,585 In fact, when you're up there "blah, blah, blah-ing," 159 00:11:41,692 --> 00:11:45,594 I'm usually doodling or mentally undressing the female parishioners. 160 00:11:45,696 --> 00:11:49,359 Well, anyhoo, can I have $40,000? 161 00:11:49,467 --> 00:11:51,992 Now, I know I haven't been the best Jew... 162 00:11:52,103 --> 00:11:54,936 but I rented Fiddler on the Roof, and I will watch it. 163 00:11:55,039 --> 00:11:57,906 - Anyway, can I have $40,000? - Hmm? 164 00:11:58,009 --> 00:12:02,139 Now, I know I haven't been the best-- Oh, forget it. 165 00:12:03,714 --> 00:12:07,081 - Honey, did you have any luck? - No, but the rabbi gave me this. 166 00:12:07,184 --> 00:12:10,676 - What is it, Dad? - Son, they call it a "droodle." 167 00:12:10,788 --> 00:12:13,723 Whoo-hoo! Look at it go! 168 00:12:13,824 --> 00:12:17,157 Hi, everybody! Are you looking for a way to slash the cost... 169 00:12:17,261 --> 00:12:19,161 of your medical expenses? 170 00:12:19,263 --> 00:12:22,721 - Boring! - Wait! This might be the answer we're looking for. 171 00:12:22,833 --> 00:12:27,827 I will perform any operation for 1 29.95. 172 00:12:27,939 --> 00:12:29,839 Come in for brain surgery... 173 00:12:29,941 --> 00:12:32,466 and receive a free Chinese finger trap. 174 00:12:34,679 --> 00:12:38,706 Okay, friend. You tried the best. Now try the rest. 175 00:12:38,816 --> 00:12:42,013 Call 1 -600-DOCTORB. 176 00:12:42,119 --> 00:12:44,212 The "B" is for "bargain"! 177 00:12:44,322 --> 00:12:47,519 Well, Marge, we could do worse. 178 00:12:47,625 --> 00:12:51,686 - How? - Uh, some dog could do the operation. 179 00:12:51,796 --> 00:12:53,855 Operation? What are you talking about? 180 00:12:53,965 --> 00:12:55,865 Kids, I have something to tell you. 181 00:12:55,967 --> 00:12:58,868 Oh, Homie, I don't know. This might upset them. 182 00:12:58,970 --> 00:13:02,133 Nothing you say can upset us. We're the MTV generation. 183 00:13:02,239 --> 00:13:05,265 - We feel neither highs nor lows. - Really? What's it like? 184 00:13:05,376 --> 00:13:08,539 - Eh. - Well, you kids are old enough to know the truth... 185 00:13:08,646 --> 00:13:11,342 and I'm not gonna sugarcoat it. 186 00:13:11,449 --> 00:13:15,943 So the tiny Aorta fairies will take Mr. Leg Vein on a long trip... 187 00:13:16,053 --> 00:13:18,613 to get married to Princess Left Ventricle. 188 00:13:18,723 --> 00:13:22,682 Dad, are you trying to tell us you're getting a coronary artery bypass graft? 189 00:13:22,793 --> 00:13:25,557 - Uh, yeah. - Oh, no. 190 00:13:25,663 --> 00:13:30,362 What if they botch it? I won't have a dad... for a while. 191 00:13:33,638 --> 00:13:36,368 Kids. Kids. I'm not gonna die. 192 00:13:36,474 --> 00:13:39,910 - That only happens to bad people. - What about Abraham Lincoln? 193 00:13:40,011 --> 00:13:42,571 Uh-- He sold poisoned milk to schoolchildren. 194 00:13:42,680 --> 00:13:45,547 - Homer! - Hey, I'm just trying to make it easier on 'em. 195 00:13:45,650 --> 00:13:49,518 Bedgoes up. Bedgoes down. Bedgoes up. Bedgoes down. 196 00:13:49,620 --> 00:13:51,520 Bed goes up. Bed goes down. 197 00:13:51,622 --> 00:13:54,284 - Bed goes up. Bed goes down. - Homer Simpson! 198 00:13:54,392 --> 00:13:58,226 Well, if that don't put the "dink" in co-inky-dink. 199 00:13:58,329 --> 00:14:00,388 Flanders, what are you doin' here? 200 00:14:00,498 --> 00:14:02,693 I'm having a kidney and a lung removed. 201 00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:06,736 - Who are you donating 'em to? - First come, first serve. What are you in for? 202 00:14:06,837 --> 00:14:10,830 - I got a bad heart. - If I could give you my heart, Homer, I would. 203 00:14:10,941 --> 00:14:13,933 Shut up, Flanders. 204 00:14:14,045 --> 00:14:17,674 Hi, everybody! I'm Dr. Nick Riviera. 205 00:14:17,782 --> 00:14:21,411 Dr. Riviera. Dr. Nick Riviera. Please report to the coroner immediately. 206 00:14:21,519 --> 00:14:24,249 The coroner? I'm so sick of that guy. 207 00:14:24,355 --> 00:14:27,415 Well, see you in the operating place. 208 00:14:27,525 --> 00:14:30,619 Where are the bodies? 209 00:14:30,728 --> 00:14:33,993 Oh, such a nice day. I think I'll go out the window. 210 00:14:34,098 --> 00:14:36,396 Ho! 211 00:14:42,139 --> 00:14:46,473 Dear Lord, thank you For Ziggy comics, little baby ducks... 212 00:14:46,577 --> 00:14:50,673 and Sweatin' to the Oldies, volumes one, two and four. 213 00:14:52,983 --> 00:14:57,113 Dear Lord, I'm really scared about this operation tomorrow. 214 00:14:57,221 --> 00:15:00,019 If something happens, please look after Marge... 215 00:15:00,124 --> 00:15:02,718 - and make sure my kids grow up right. - Shh! 216 00:15:05,830 --> 00:15:07,889 Sorry. 217 00:15:12,903 --> 00:15:17,203 - And that's why God causes train wrecks. - Ah! 218 00:15:17,308 --> 00:15:21,210 My dad is very sick. What's gonna happen if he dies? 219 00:15:21,312 --> 00:15:24,611 Well, if he's been good, he'll go to heaven. 220 00:15:24,715 --> 00:15:28,617 In heaven, you get to do Whatever you like best all the time. 221 00:15:29,987 --> 00:15:32,012 Cloud goes up. Cloud goes down. 222 00:15:32,123 --> 00:15:34,023 Cloud goes up. Cloud goes down. 223 00:15:34,125 --> 00:15:36,355 Bed goes up. Bed goes down. 224 00:15:36,460 --> 00:15:38,928 Hey, hey! 225 00:15:39,029 --> 00:15:41,691 Hey, what's the matter? 226 00:15:41,799 --> 00:15:46,532 Oh, that's right. My grotesque appearance. 227 00:15:46,637 --> 00:15:50,004 - Krusty, why are you here? - Eh, it's part of my public service... 228 00:15:50,107 --> 00:15:54,203 for my glug-glug, vroom-vroom, thump-thump. 229 00:15:54,311 --> 00:15:56,745 Oh. Well, I could use a good laugh. 230 00:15:56,847 --> 00:15:59,645 Well, there's nothing funny about What you're about to go through. 231 00:15:59,750 --> 00:16:03,015 I know. I'm in the zipper club myself. 232 00:16:04,955 --> 00:16:06,855 - Ahh! - You seem okay. 233 00:16:06,957 --> 00:16:11,894 Yeah? Well, I got news for ya. This ain't makeup. 234 00:16:11,996 --> 00:16:17,559 They say the greatest tragedy is when a father outlives his son. 235 00:16:17,668 --> 00:16:20,364 I've never fully understood why that is. 236 00:16:20,471 --> 00:16:24,066 Frankly, I can see an upside to it. 237 00:16:24,175 --> 00:16:26,939 We passed this card around at work. 238 00:16:27,044 --> 00:16:30,536 - Gee, thanks, guys. - They had a hell of a time replacing ya. 239 00:16:33,617 --> 00:16:37,849 When I first heard about the operation, I was against it. 240 00:16:37,955 --> 00:16:42,551 But then I thought, if Homer wants to be a woman, so be it. 241 00:16:42,660 --> 00:16:45,094 Barney, I'm not getting a sex change! 242 00:16:45,196 --> 00:16:48,324 What? Well, what the hell am I supposed to do... 243 00:16:48,432 --> 00:16:50,696 with this jumbo thong bikini? 244 00:16:50,801 --> 00:16:54,168 Uh, Homer, I snuck you in a beer for old times' sake. 245 00:16:54,271 --> 00:16:56,603 Thanks, Moe. 246 00:16:56,707 --> 00:16:59,835 Uh, you know, Homer, that beer ain't free. 247 00:17:01,879 --> 00:17:03,710 Mom, this is fascinating. 248 00:17:03,814 --> 00:17:07,113 Did you know that they'll stop Dad's heart for six whole minutes? 249 00:17:07,218 --> 00:17:11,211 I don't know if I like you reading all those cardiology books. 250 00:17:11,322 --> 00:17:13,415 No, Mom. It's very reassuring. 251 00:17:13,524 --> 00:17:16,960 And I've learned a great deal from this cow's heart I got at the butcher shop. 252 00:17:18,429 --> 00:17:21,865 Insert the retractor... 253 00:17:21,966 --> 00:17:25,129 and crank it until the ribs swing open like a rusty drawbridge. 254 00:17:25,236 --> 00:17:28,637 Ah! No! Blood! Ugh! 255 00:17:28,739 --> 00:17:31,765 Next, make an incision in the coronary artery-- 256 00:17:31,876 --> 00:17:35,642 And we are back with more of People Who Look Like Things. 257 00:17:43,354 --> 00:17:47,415 Oh, no! No! Someone taped over the end of this! 258 00:17:47,524 --> 00:17:50,516 All we ask is to be treated with dignity and respect. 259 00:17:50,628 --> 00:17:52,687 And a new candle now and then? 260 00:17:52,796 --> 00:17:55,594 Yes, and a new ca-- No! 261 00:17:55,699 --> 00:17:58,361 Oh, my little Maggie. 262 00:17:58,469 --> 00:18:03,099 I may never hold you again. Ew! Stinky pants! 263 00:18:03,207 --> 00:18:07,200 Now, Marge, if the unthinkable should happen, you're gonna be lonely-- 264 00:18:07,311 --> 00:18:10,542 - Oh, Homie, I could never remarry. - Darn right. 265 00:18:10,648 --> 00:18:13,014 And to make sure, I want to be stuffed and put on the couch... 266 00:18:13,117 --> 00:18:17,213 - as a constant reminder of our marital vows. - Ohh. Kids? 267 00:18:17,321 --> 00:18:19,789 You can come in now. 268 00:18:21,058 --> 00:18:23,356 Bed goes up-- Kids... 269 00:18:23,460 --> 00:18:26,793 I want to give you some words to remember me by in case something happens. 270 00:18:26,897 --> 00:18:30,731 Let's see. Uh-- 271 00:18:30,834 --> 00:18:33,769 Oh, I'm no good at this. 272 00:18:35,673 --> 00:18:39,905 Bart, the saddest thing about this is I won't get to see you grow up, because-- 273 00:18:42,012 --> 00:18:45,311 I know you're gonna turn out great, with or without your old man. 274 00:18:45,416 --> 00:18:49,682 - Thanks, Dad. - And Lisa-- 275 00:18:52,156 --> 00:18:54,181 I guess this is the time to tell you-- 276 00:18:54,291 --> 00:18:57,385 you're adopted and I don't like you. 277 00:18:57,494 --> 00:18:59,519 Bart! 278 00:18:59,630 --> 00:19:01,894 But don't worry, because you've got a big brother who loves you... 279 00:19:01,999 --> 00:19:03,830 and will always look out for you. 280 00:19:03,934 --> 00:19:06,061 Oh, Dad. 281 00:19:10,407 --> 00:19:14,810 - Hi, everybody! - Hi, Dr. Nick! 282 00:19:14,912 --> 00:19:17,073 Now, if something should go wrong... 283 00:19:17,181 --> 00:19:19,809 let's not get the law involved. 284 00:19:19,917 --> 00:19:24,547 One hand washes the other. Ooh, that reminds me. 285 00:19:26,991 --> 00:19:30,552 These gloves came free with my toilet brush. 286 00:19:35,866 --> 00:19:38,061 What the hell is that? 287 00:19:41,672 --> 00:19:44,163 Marge, this is Andre. 288 00:19:44,274 --> 00:19:46,139 Hello. 289 00:19:46,243 --> 00:19:48,643 I think you two would make a lovely couple. 290 00:19:48,746 --> 00:19:51,146 My husband is still alive! 291 00:19:51,248 --> 00:19:53,808 Oh. Thank God. I hope he pulls through. 292 00:19:53,917 --> 00:19:56,112 Not me. 293 00:19:56,220 --> 00:19:58,984 Let's have a minute of silent prayer... 294 00:19:59,089 --> 00:20:02,320 for our good friend, Homer Simpson. 295 00:20:07,431 --> 00:20:09,797 - How long has it been? - Six seconds. 296 00:20:09,900 --> 00:20:12,596 - Do we have to start over? - Hell, no. 297 00:20:12,703 --> 00:20:16,332 Poor Mr. Homer. Could it be that my snack treats... 298 00:20:16,440 --> 00:20:19,603 - are responsible for his wretched health? - Gimme some jerky. 299 00:20:19,710 --> 00:20:22,144 - Would you like some vodka with that? - Oh, what the hell. Sure. 300 00:20:28,052 --> 00:20:31,647 Doctor, what's wrong? Don't you know where to make the incision? 301 00:20:31,755 --> 00:20:34,315 All right, Nick. Don't panic. 302 00:20:34,425 --> 00:20:36,552 Think back to med school. 303 00:20:38,729 --> 00:20:42,358 Seriously, baby. I can prescribe anything I want. 304 00:20:44,368 --> 00:20:48,361 I know I'm supposed to cut something, but what? And where? 305 00:20:49,673 --> 00:20:52,836 Hey! The incision in the coronary artery... 306 00:20:52,943 --> 00:20:55,537 must be made below the blockage! 307 00:20:55,646 --> 00:20:59,377 - Below! - Thanks, little girl! 308 00:21:11,261 --> 00:21:13,229 Uh-oh. 309 00:21:15,966 --> 00:21:21,063 Goodnews! The operation was a complete success. 310 00:21:22,739 --> 00:21:25,902 Oh, that's wonderful! Mmm! 311 00:21:26,009 --> 00:21:28,807 Hmm. 312 00:21:28,912 --> 00:21:31,972 Dr. Nick Riviera, remember me? 313 00:21:32,082 --> 00:21:35,449 Well if it isn't my old friend Mr. McGreg... 314 00:21:35,552 --> 00:21:38,646 with a leg for an arm and an arm for a leg. 315 00:21:42,659 --> 00:21:44,650 All right, Dad! 316 00:21:44,761 --> 00:21:47,059 You rule intensive care! 317 00:22:46,490 --> 00:22:48,458 Shh!