1 00:00:02,085 --> 00:00:05,046 辛普森家庭 2 00:00:05,463 --> 00:00:06,339 (古戈爾普勒克斯戲院) 3 00:00:06,423 --> 00:00:07,340 ("報仇者聯盟:水晶之戰") 4 00:00:22,480 --> 00:00:26,234 我薩必斯終於拿到末日程式 5 00:00:26,568 --> 00:00:28,737 可以用烈焰 6 00:00:28,820 --> 00:00:31,072 讓這顆星球變成烏托邦重新開始 7 00:00:31,156 --> 00:00:32,365 我不知道,薩必斯 8 00:00:32,449 --> 00:00:35,160 你說烏托邦,我怎麼覺得是殺光大家 9 00:00:35,243 --> 00:00:37,996 我可不想再找新的乾洗店 10 00:00:38,079 --> 00:00:42,709 你的冷笑話也救不了你,鎂鐵人 11 00:00:42,834 --> 00:00:45,879 對,但我還是令你分心了,對吧? 12 00:00:46,087 --> 00:00:47,255 拿下他,空射手 13 00:00:50,467 --> 00:00:52,927 對,空射手,幫空氣槍集氣 14 00:00:53,178 --> 00:00:56,097 集了五次?壓力也太大了吧 15 00:01:00,602 --> 00:01:02,687 怎麼了?"摸不著頭腦"嗎? 16 00:01:05,356 --> 00:01:08,943 我要把報仇者聯盟徹底抹去 17 00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:10,695 (重新開始) 18 00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:16,451 我接受你的邀舞 19 00:01:21,414 --> 00:01:24,709 他們的第一個吻也是最後一個 20 00:01:31,424 --> 00:01:34,094 (待續…) 21 00:01:44,229 --> 00:01:46,689 原來"水晶之戰" 22 00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:48,483 是因為大家都變成水晶 23 00:01:48,733 --> 00:01:52,237 現在不適合說這些冷血的分析 24 00:01:52,654 --> 00:01:54,614 續集還要再等一年 25 00:01:55,073 --> 00:01:57,826 是誰那麼狠心要讓我們等這麼久? 26 00:01:57,909 --> 00:02:00,286 一年?感覺就像幾百萬年 27 00:02:00,370 --> 00:02:01,746 我等不了那麼久 28 00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:05,625 別想走,你們這些穿披風的混帳傢伙 29 00:02:08,878 --> 00:02:11,756 (11個月後) 30 00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:13,091 (春田市小學) 31 00:02:13,383 --> 00:02:15,552 同學們,今天集合大家 32 00:02:15,635 --> 00:02:16,719 是為了警告你們 33 00:02:16,803 --> 00:02:18,096 最近有個危險的網路趨勢 34 00:02:18,304 --> 00:02:20,056 紅椒粉挑戰? 35 00:02:20,181 --> 00:02:22,100 八號球挑戰? 36 00:02:22,183 --> 00:02:24,978 不,這個具高度模仿性的特技 37 00:02:25,061 --> 00:02:27,230 稱為"立旗挑戰" 38 00:02:27,313 --> 00:02:29,858 (西蒙螢幕保護程式) 39 00:02:29,941 --> 00:02:31,860 這不僅是口頭警告 40 00:02:31,943 --> 00:02:34,154 我明白想要更有遏制效果 41 00:02:34,237 --> 00:02:38,366 就必須讓大家看看網紅"反應大師" 42 00:02:38,449 --> 00:02:39,659 真槍實彈的表演 43 00:02:40,743 --> 00:02:44,622 反應大師?他一表演大家都會有反應 44 00:02:44,706 --> 00:02:45,915 看好了,要記住… 45 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:47,000 千萬不要這麼做 46 00:02:47,208 --> 00:02:50,753 各位反應迷大家好,我是反應大師 47 00:02:51,004 --> 00:02:53,715 今天我要進行立旗挑戰 48 00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:57,260 對我的團隊尖叫吧 刺蝟、淡薄荷和懷特馬利克 49 00:02:57,385 --> 00:02:58,887 他們會把我當旗幟升起來 50 00:03:02,974 --> 00:03:04,809 (反應大師,升起自己挑戰,14米 訂閱者) 51 00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:06,477 這太緊了 52 00:03:06,644 --> 00:03:07,520 (反應) 53 00:03:07,812 --> 00:03:09,230 太酷了 54 00:03:11,441 --> 00:03:14,652 (五分鐘後) 55 00:03:14,903 --> 00:03:16,362 大家好,我是霸子辛普森 56 00:03:16,446 --> 00:03:18,323 這是我的新頻道,反應霸子 57 00:03:18,406 --> 00:03:22,243 感謝夥伴白西蒙替我準備立旗挑戰 58 00:03:22,327 --> 00:03:23,244 坐穩了 59 00:03:23,369 --> 00:03:24,454 (無盡的戰爭老兵) 60 00:03:24,537 --> 00:03:25,747 好,開始,瞧好了 61 00:03:25,914 --> 00:03:28,917 我在向我的仇人揮手,他們都不知道 62 00:03:29,209 --> 00:03:30,919 拉太緊了 63 00:03:32,045 --> 00:03:33,087 買我的貨品 64 00:03:33,463 --> 00:03:36,257 未來的貨品,貨品 65 00:03:40,720 --> 00:03:43,556 他的腹斜肌也太強了 66 00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:46,643 下次去游泳我要看個仔細 67 00:03:53,024 --> 00:03:54,901 米爾豪斯,不 68 00:03:54,984 --> 00:03:56,986 我需要你的密碼來上傳影片 69 00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,988 (春田市立綜合醫院) 70 00:03:59,739 --> 00:04:01,991 米爾豪斯,我在禮品店買了氣球給你 71 00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:03,243 (是個女孩) 72 00:04:04,327 --> 00:04:05,328 (你是男生) 73 00:04:05,411 --> 00:04:06,663 醫生怎麼說? 74 00:04:07,705 --> 00:04:09,457 我全身扭傷 75 00:04:09,666 --> 00:04:12,669 大部分肌肉都跑到錯誤的骨頭上了 76 00:04:12,752 --> 00:04:14,837 好了,小子,要去做復健了 77 00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:17,257 誰準備好跟彈力帶連玩四個小時? 78 00:04:17,423 --> 00:04:19,300 不,不要紫色的 79 00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:24,597 (葡萄糖) 80 00:04:25,056 --> 00:04:26,099 葡萄糖? 81 00:04:26,683 --> 00:04:28,184 給我來一點吧 82 00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:33,231 好了,老兄,你可以的 83 00:04:33,523 --> 00:04:36,401 是不簡單,但那些小搗蛋都靠你了 84 00:04:36,484 --> 00:04:38,319 為了小搗蛋 85 00:04:49,914 --> 00:04:51,791 你們好啊,姑娘 86 00:04:52,083 --> 00:04:55,044 你是葛倫譚吉爾    你是空射手 87 00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:56,838 南丁格爾,算你們厲害 88 00:04:56,963 --> 00:05:02,093 誰能告訴我米爾豪斯範豪登在哪裡? 89 00:05:02,552 --> 00:05:05,388 走廊走到底左轉 90 00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:09,809 賣騷了是吧,黛比? 91 00:05:09,892 --> 00:05:11,811 抱歉,又不是每個人… 92 00:05:11,894 --> 00:05:15,481 都能嫁給歐登維的賣車王 93 00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:17,900 你好啊,小兄弟 94 00:05:17,984 --> 00:05:20,611 我最喜歡的現實英雄還好嗎? 95 00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:23,448 天啊,你是葛倫譚吉爾 96 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:27,577 我沒聽過那個名字,我叫空射手 97 00:05:30,788 --> 00:05:32,415 你是我最喜歡的報仇者 98 00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:34,083 你甚至沒有超能力 99 00:05:34,167 --> 00:05:35,752 只是很會操縱空氣 100 00:05:36,210 --> 00:05:38,921 當心點,不要太激動,米爾豪斯 101 00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:40,214 我不是… 102 00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:42,592 我是米爾豪斯 103 00:05:45,136 --> 00:05:47,096 沒錯,冷靜點,小英雄 104 00:05:47,180 --> 00:05:49,307 別讓病情惡化了 105 00:05:49,891 --> 00:05:51,476 你的病會惡化嗎? 106 00:05:51,559 --> 00:05:52,935 拜託告訴我不會 107 00:05:53,102 --> 00:05:55,104 別擔心,空射手,我沒事 108 00:05:55,271 --> 00:05:59,025 你還真是個勇敢的小傢伙 109 00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:04,405 謝天謝地你不是那種勇敢小鬥士 110 00:06:04,489 --> 00:06:05,782 讓我得拿這個給你看 111 00:06:06,074 --> 00:06:07,784 等等,包包裡面是什麼? 112 00:06:08,242 --> 00:06:09,994 就是台筆記型電腦 113 00:06:10,078 --> 00:06:13,956 裡面有"報仇者聯盟:水晶之戰2" 114 00:06:16,834 --> 00:06:19,420 最重要的是你不會有事,小兄弟 115 00:06:21,297 --> 00:06:23,383 我從來就不想當演員 116 00:06:23,466 --> 00:06:27,011 只想跟我爸一樣當個無尾熊屠夫 117 00:06:34,143 --> 00:06:35,728 空射手,葛倫 118 00:06:39,357 --> 00:06:40,274 (慢萎影業機密檔案) 119 00:06:40,358 --> 00:06:41,359 你好啊 120 00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:44,529 (確認使用者) 121 00:06:44,612 --> 00:06:45,863 (水晶之戰2:再起) 122 00:06:45,947 --> 00:06:47,949 太讚了 123 00:06:55,706 --> 00:06:57,417 好棒的結局 124 00:06:57,542 --> 00:06:59,502 大家看到一定會瘋掉 125 00:07:00,503 --> 00:07:02,046 還要再過一個月 126 00:07:02,296 --> 00:07:06,592 在那之前,只有我知道結局 127 00:07:06,759 --> 00:07:08,928 只有我一個人 128 00:07:09,345 --> 00:07:13,224 我是全世界最厲害的小孩 129 00:07:16,519 --> 00:07:19,105 把袋鼠腿丟到鍋子裡 130 00:07:19,188 --> 00:07:21,566 過會兒就爛了 131 00:07:27,238 --> 00:07:28,364 胖索爾 132 00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:31,409 我看過報仇者聯盟:水晶之戰2了 133 00:07:31,492 --> 00:07:34,370 少來    我兄弟空射手給我看的 134 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,372 笑死人了 135 00:07:36,456 --> 00:07:39,417 那個塔斯馬尼亞人葛倫譚吉爾 136 00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:42,962 最好是會跟你這種小咖打交道 137 00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:51,721 你輸了,報仇者 138 00:07:51,929 --> 00:07:54,557 只要我還有一口氣在就別想 139 00:07:59,228 --> 00:08:02,440 要命,繼續說 140 00:08:03,274 --> 00:08:06,652 試看免錢,接下來就要付費了 141 00:08:06,736 --> 00:08:09,113 我想要那本"三點博士"漫畫 142 00:08:09,197 --> 00:08:10,823 想很久了 143 00:08:10,948 --> 00:08:12,158 ("三點博士") 144 00:08:12,867 --> 00:08:14,410 好,你先做好準備 145 00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:16,746 故事的結局是…    等等 146 00:08:16,829 --> 00:08:20,416 你即將爆出年度最大電影的雷 147 00:08:20,666 --> 00:08:24,128 不,是本世紀,本時代,是今年夏季 148 00:08:24,712 --> 00:08:25,796 什麼都不要說 149 00:08:26,130 --> 00:08:28,508 但是我快被好奇心淹沒了 150 00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:30,176 好吧,是這樣的 151 00:08:30,259 --> 00:08:32,595 電影一開始先是標題…    住嘴 152 00:08:32,678 --> 00:08:33,554 說 153 00:08:33,804 --> 00:08:34,722 不要說 154 00:08:34,847 --> 00:08:36,098 快說清楚 155 00:08:38,643 --> 00:08:39,727 我通過考驗了 156 00:08:39,810 --> 00:08:43,189 我將會繼續當個漫畫宅 157 00:08:46,484 --> 00:08:47,652 有蝦呢 158 00:08:47,777 --> 00:08:50,321 為了不被爆雷 159 00:08:50,404 --> 00:08:52,156 你願意付出什麼代價? 160 00:08:54,367 --> 00:08:56,118 走吧,爆雷小子 161 00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:58,079 爆雷小子 162 00:08:58,663 --> 00:08:59,789 我喜歡 163 00:09:04,252 --> 00:09:05,461 就是他看了… 164 00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:08,047 "報仇者聯盟:水晶之戰2" 165 00:09:08,130 --> 00:09:10,925 乖乖聽他的話,不然他會說出結局 166 00:09:11,008 --> 00:09:12,927 我要保護我純潔的耳朵 167 00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:22,687 可以多一點吧 168 00:09:22,770 --> 00:09:24,855 每人四塊雞塊 169 00:09:24,939 --> 00:09:27,108 就算這個人知道哪個報仇者 170 00:09:27,191 --> 00:09:28,985 在跟空手道蠍子大戰時 171 00:09:29,068 --> 00:09:30,778 失去三分之一力量嗎? 172 00:09:30,861 --> 00:09:33,614 住嘴,我男友要帶我… 173 00:09:33,698 --> 00:09:35,700 去二輪戲院看這部片 174 00:09:37,493 --> 00:09:38,369 起來 175 00:09:38,703 --> 00:09:41,539 振作一點,認真過活 176 00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:44,208 辛普森,你每多吃一塊雞塊 177 00:09:44,292 --> 00:09:46,669 就罰你多留校一天 178 00:09:50,715 --> 00:09:52,300 留校察看是嗎? 179 00:09:52,383 --> 00:09:54,677 看來我們有很多時間 180 00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:56,512 可以討論你最喜歡的報仇者 181 00:09:56,596 --> 00:09:57,847 黑巫毒的下場了 182 00:09:58,681 --> 00:10:00,141 法國區的鬥士? 183 00:10:00,391 --> 00:10:03,394 諒你不敢毀了我唯一的快樂 184 00:10:03,477 --> 00:10:04,645 把假髮交給我 185 00:10:06,105 --> 00:10:07,106 假髮? 186 00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,066 我不戴假髮的 187 00:10:09,150 --> 00:10:11,235 鏡頭轉到波本街 188 00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:20,244 史金納校長,什麼風把你吹來了? 189 00:10:20,786 --> 00:10:22,038 是你啊 190 00:10:22,496 --> 00:10:24,707 這些東西是哪來的? 191 00:10:24,790 --> 00:10:26,792 因為大家都要乖乖聽我的話 192 00:10:26,876 --> 00:10:28,711 否則我就要爆報仇者聯盟的雷 193 00:10:28,919 --> 00:10:32,632 例如,去跟媽說我可以喝汽水泡穀片 194 00:10:32,715 --> 00:10:35,134 我不知道,你媽不會答應的 195 00:10:35,217 --> 00:10:38,137 好,那就準備好聽到大結局吧 196 00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:40,389 我猜猜看,好人贏了 197 00:10:41,098 --> 00:10:42,183 是誰告訴你的? 198 00:10:42,266 --> 00:10:44,685 你爆雷也沒用 199 00:10:44,769 --> 00:10:47,229 因為我根本不在乎 200 00:10:47,563 --> 00:10:49,231 身為成年人 201 00:10:49,315 --> 00:10:51,734 我知道穿著緊身衣 202 00:10:51,817 --> 00:10:52,943 又有超能力的肌肉男 203 00:10:53,027 --> 00:10:54,445 又揍人又互相擁抱的劇情 204 00:10:54,528 --> 00:10:56,697 是給小孩看的鬧劇 205 00:10:56,864 --> 00:10:59,575 說吧,告訴我那個某某隊長 206 00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:01,035 對哪個壞蛋做了什麼事 207 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:03,037 對我完全沒意義 208 00:11:03,913 --> 00:11:06,374 我的能力對你起不了作用 209 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:10,378 但如果我能讓你利用這個能力呢? 210 00:11:11,295 --> 00:11:14,382 你邪惡的語氣讓我很感興趣 211 00:11:14,799 --> 00:11:17,468 啤酒喝到飽,我請客 212 00:11:19,053 --> 00:11:20,680 老莫付錢 213 00:11:20,763 --> 00:11:24,308 我根本連問都不想問了 214 00:11:26,477 --> 00:11:27,603 來吧,小子 215 00:11:27,853 --> 00:11:29,480 不行,不能說 216 00:11:29,563 --> 00:11:32,858 我要帶我女友去二輪戲院看那部片 217 00:11:41,158 --> 00:11:43,536 你昨天晚上幾點回家? 218 00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:45,454 那不是我的錯 219 00:11:45,621 --> 00:11:49,875 霸子用他的超能力讓我喝個爛醉 220 00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:52,920 我擔心這樣勒索別人 221 00:11:53,003 --> 00:11:55,256 會讓霸子成了壞小孩 222 00:12:00,219 --> 00:12:02,138 大家早 223 00:12:02,430 --> 00:12:05,850 年輕人,我不喜歡你這樣用爆雷 224 00:12:05,933 --> 00:12:07,518 四處指使人家 225 00:12:07,685 --> 00:12:09,729 百滋可樂 226 00:12:09,854 --> 00:12:12,898 什麼?我得到了超能力,當然要用啊 227 00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:16,026 如果是你,你也會這麼做的 228 00:12:16,110 --> 00:12:20,656 影迷對於慢萎影業有很深的感情 229 00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:24,201 我是絕對不會利用這點的,絕對不會 230 00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:26,704 是這樣嗎? 231 00:12:27,455 --> 00:12:29,290 (學校舞會) 232 00:12:34,462 --> 00:12:38,883 麗莎辛普森,你的超能力就是偷心 233 00:12:42,178 --> 00:12:44,346 你覺得這種利用方法怎麼樣? 234 00:12:46,015 --> 00:12:47,016 還不錯 235 00:12:48,642 --> 00:12:52,021 我還要配合這場鬧劇多久? 236 00:12:52,188 --> 00:12:54,774 你有多不想讓慢萎影業高層知道 237 00:12:54,857 --> 00:12:58,402 我趁你喝醉的時候看了電影? 238 00:13:01,822 --> 00:13:04,116 你把我當成你的小跟班是吧? 239 00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:07,787 等到下禮拜四,我就不用聽你擺佈了 240 00:13:07,870 --> 00:13:11,665 到時候電影將登上所有大銀幕 241 00:13:11,957 --> 00:13:14,585 在那之後,你就什麼也不是了 242 00:13:15,544 --> 00:13:18,255 我們繼續開趴吧 243 00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:23,677 他說得沒錯,時間快沒了 244 00:13:23,761 --> 00:13:25,554 現在是終局之戰 245 00:13:26,263 --> 00:13:29,433 今天我們要歡慶大家最喜愛的橡樹 246 00:13:29,517 --> 00:13:32,353 老蘇西兩百歲生日 247 00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:35,731 它遼闊的樹蔭見證了本市的婚禮 248 00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:37,733 家庭聚會,成… 249 00:13:37,858 --> 00:13:38,859 成… 250 00:13:41,612 --> 00:13:42,905 墨西哥版猶太成年禮 251 00:13:42,988 --> 00:13:44,281 (市長) 252 00:13:45,658 --> 00:13:48,619 大家蓋住耳朵,是爆雷小子 253 00:13:48,702 --> 00:13:50,329 沒錯,就是我 254 00:13:50,412 --> 00:13:52,206 如果不想被爆雷 255 00:13:52,289 --> 00:13:55,918 那大家就一起在老蘇西樹上… 256 00:13:56,001 --> 00:13:59,797 照我的設計替我蓋樹屋 257 00:14:01,298 --> 00:14:03,092 不能蓋在老蘇西上 258 00:14:03,175 --> 00:14:05,886 大家都很愛這棵樹 259 00:14:06,136 --> 00:14:07,763 我們別無選擇 260 00:14:08,013 --> 00:14:11,100 他把我們玩弄在鼓掌之間 261 00:14:11,350 --> 00:14:15,312 除非這孩子遇上不幸的"意外" 262 00:14:16,605 --> 00:14:19,817 要是我發生任何可疑的事 263 00:14:20,025 --> 00:14:22,194 我已經找來全市嗓門最大的人 264 00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:25,197 在每個街角大聲說出結局 265 00:14:25,364 --> 00:14:26,866 交給我 266 00:14:27,032 --> 00:14:29,785 給你們24小時把樹屋蓋好 267 00:14:29,869 --> 00:14:31,203 時間不等人 268 00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:39,962 兄弟,你出院了 269 00:14:40,212 --> 00:14:42,089 你少來了 270 00:14:42,172 --> 00:14:44,466 你搶走我跟空射手的見面機會 271 00:14:44,592 --> 00:14:46,135 你這個惡棍 272 00:14:46,468 --> 00:14:48,971 我是惡棍?才不是 273 00:14:49,054 --> 00:14:51,891 你勒索全市的人替你蓋藏身處 274 00:14:51,974 --> 00:14:55,978 好吧,我承認這件事不太理想 275 00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:58,814 你擁有力量,卻拿來做壞事 276 00:14:58,981 --> 00:15:01,066 你真是超級大惡棍 277 00:15:01,150 --> 00:15:04,194 你竟敢叫我超級大惡棍? 278 00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:08,282 給我聽好了,整部片最大的雷就是… 279 00:15:09,366 --> 00:15:10,993 鎂鐵人?    鎂鐵人? 280 00:15:11,076 --> 00:15:14,330 別說話,全宇宙的命運就靠你們了 281 00:15:24,632 --> 00:15:26,300 這是哪裡? 282 00:15:26,592 --> 00:15:28,052 放輕鬆,爆雷小子 283 00:15:28,135 --> 00:15:30,512 我只不過是把你帶來我們的世界 284 00:15:30,596 --> 00:15:32,723 就是"慢萎宇宙" 285 00:15:32,806 --> 00:15:36,101 你眼中的電影就是我們的現實世界 286 00:15:36,185 --> 00:15:38,979 不可能,超級英雄根本不是真的 287 00:15:39,063 --> 00:15:41,106 你們把我當傻子啊? 288 00:15:42,232 --> 00:15:44,151 是真的超能力 289 00:15:44,234 --> 00:15:47,947 你在報仇者聯盟片中看到的都是真的 290 00:15:48,822 --> 00:15:50,741 就連劇尾彩蛋也是? 291 00:15:51,742 --> 00:15:53,410 我們把你帶來 292 00:15:53,494 --> 00:15:56,497 讓你看看你那自私行為帶來的後果 293 00:15:58,540 --> 00:16:00,209 空射手死了? 294 00:16:00,292 --> 00:16:01,627 但是他在電影裡還活著 295 00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,128 發生什麼事? 296 00:16:03,379 --> 00:16:04,588 都是你害的 297 00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:06,590 你這個臭小子 298 00:16:06,757 --> 00:16:10,719 你給那個漫畫宅看了… 299 00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:13,889 空射手呼氣拯救自己的片段 300 00:16:14,014 --> 00:16:16,976 我們這個空間的邪惡力量看到畫面 301 00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:21,855 所以事先封住空射手的嘴巴,殺了他 302 00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:24,149 我都不知道 303 00:16:24,233 --> 00:16:26,902 我沒想到爆雷真的會傷害人 304 00:16:27,111 --> 00:16:30,364 但是爆雷真的會害死人 305 00:16:31,281 --> 00:16:33,492 我愛你,空射手 306 00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:35,995 虛擬實境真的有用 307 00:16:36,078 --> 00:16:39,289 這小子不知道這些都是假的 308 00:16:39,498 --> 00:16:43,335 不敢相信他沒注意到後院的傳送門 309 00:16:43,419 --> 00:16:45,879 只是個黏滿螢光棒的垃圾袋 310 00:16:46,714 --> 00:16:48,257 這樣做是對的吧 311 00:16:48,340 --> 00:16:52,594 這樣霸子才能選擇當好人 312 00:16:52,678 --> 00:16:56,890 別擔心,瑪姬,這種小把戲傷不了人 313 00:16:57,057 --> 00:16:59,643 你不是常這麼說嗎? 314 00:16:59,727 --> 00:17:01,061 還記得嗎? 315 00:17:02,271 --> 00:17:03,981 這可不是小把戲 316 00:17:04,064 --> 00:17:07,609 把它當作超級先進的身歷其境體驗 317 00:17:07,693 --> 00:17:11,113 你們搞這些就只為了防止劇情流出? 318 00:17:11,196 --> 00:17:14,658 "報仇者聯盟:水晶之戰:再起" 319 00:17:14,742 --> 00:17:16,118 要是票房失利 320 00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:18,245 將會有可怕的後續效應 321 00:17:18,495 --> 00:17:19,663 主題公園倒閉 322 00:17:19,747 --> 00:17:22,332 萬聖節戲服滯銷,堆在倉庫 323 00:17:22,416 --> 00:17:24,668 爆米花農民相繼自殺 324 00:17:24,752 --> 00:17:26,462 到了第二週 325 00:17:26,545 --> 00:17:29,214 要是票房不到百分之55 326 00:17:29,298 --> 00:17:32,426 全球經濟就會在一夕之間崩塌 327 00:17:32,718 --> 00:17:34,344 你想要這樣嗎,小女孩? 328 00:17:34,553 --> 00:17:35,804 是嗎?    不想 329 00:17:35,888 --> 00:17:38,557 霸子顯然已經夠難過了 330 00:17:38,640 --> 00:17:40,309 還不能放他出來嗎? 331 00:17:40,434 --> 00:17:43,187 不行,我們必須百分之百確定 332 00:17:43,270 --> 00:17:45,564 提高模擬強度 333 00:17:49,568 --> 00:17:51,445 把那男孩帶過來 334 00:17:57,159 --> 00:17:58,911 記得,小子,不要爆雷 335 00:17:58,994 --> 00:18:00,579 我們的宇宙就靠你了 336 00:18:00,662 --> 00:18:02,581 也不要散布盜版影片 337 00:18:02,664 --> 00:18:04,500 那樣對誰都不好 338 00:18:07,753 --> 00:18:10,380 看過結局的男孩 339 00:18:10,589 --> 00:18:14,343 告訴我,好讓我毀掉報仇者聯盟 340 00:18:14,635 --> 00:18:17,429 為了回報,我會給你你最想要的東西 341 00:18:17,721 --> 00:18:19,765 真正的超能力 342 00:18:20,724 --> 00:18:21,767 肌肉 343 00:18:22,309 --> 00:18:23,268 爪子 344 00:18:23,602 --> 00:18:24,603 機車 345 00:18:25,062 --> 00:18:26,105 真正的超能力 346 00:18:26,188 --> 00:18:28,690 那比爆雷之力還厲害 347 00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:33,362 不,兒子要選擇邪惡的一方了 348 00:18:33,445 --> 00:18:37,866 不,我們的兒子太傻,他會上當的 349 00:18:38,158 --> 00:18:40,369 是不是真的無所謂 350 00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:42,538 霸子的靈魂命懸一線 351 00:18:42,704 --> 00:18:45,791 好棒的反應,繼續加強吧 352 00:18:46,917 --> 00:18:51,797 告訴我劇情,接受你身為惡棍的命運 353 00:18:52,881 --> 00:18:53,882 空射手 354 00:18:55,092 --> 00:18:57,427 好,我會告訴你要怎麼打贏大家 355 00:18:57,511 --> 00:18:58,554 不    孩子 356 00:18:58,846 --> 00:19:00,764 去死吧 357 00:19:05,102 --> 00:19:06,478 不… 358 00:19:06,562 --> 00:19:08,480 不 359 00:19:15,237 --> 00:19:19,032 我們的兒子是好人 360 00:19:19,116 --> 00:19:22,536 但他還是好傻,太傻了 361 00:19:22,619 --> 00:19:25,080 那孩子拒絕了真正的超能力 362 00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:26,832 這下他應該不會爆雷了 363 00:19:27,457 --> 00:19:28,834 好,就讓他活著吧 364 00:19:29,585 --> 00:19:30,586 暫且留他一命 365 00:19:35,799 --> 00:19:38,093 我回來了,希望還沒太遲 366 00:19:40,012 --> 00:19:41,013 今天幾號? 367 00:19:41,096 --> 00:19:42,848 今天是陣亡將士紀念日的 368 00:19:42,931 --> 00:19:43,891 前一個禮拜三 369 00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:46,727 還有時間,電影還沒被爆雷 370 00:19:46,810 --> 00:19:50,314 別擔心,你的祕密在我這裡很安全 371 00:19:51,523 --> 00:19:52,774 我救了全宇宙 372 00:19:52,858 --> 00:19:55,527 我不是惡棍,是超級英雄 373 00:19:56,612 --> 00:19:58,488 什麼時候可以告訴他    不准說 374 00:19:59,990 --> 00:20:01,617 好,大家都不會說了 375 00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:02,743 電影安全了 376 00:20:02,910 --> 00:20:03,994 就放過他們吧 377 00:20:04,119 --> 00:20:05,329 暫時如此 378 00:20:08,123 --> 00:20:10,042 (已啟動) 379 00:20:10,125 --> 00:20:11,835 (已解除) 380 00:20:22,179 --> 00:20:24,431 我不是壞人,我是好人 381 00:20:24,514 --> 00:20:26,975 我再也不會爆雷了 382 00:20:28,143 --> 00:20:30,604 我已經改過自新了 383 00:20:30,938 --> 00:20:33,440 我早就知道你是當英雄的料 384 00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:35,692 告訴我,白鯨人有沒有當上… 385 00:20:35,776 --> 00:20:37,319 魚之國的國王? 386 00:20:38,946 --> 00:20:39,863 有嗎? 387 00:20:39,947 --> 00:20:41,198 霸子,告訴我啊 388 00:20:41,406 --> 00:20:43,158 大家快停工 389 00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:46,495 鎂鐵人保佑大家 390 00:20:47,496 --> 00:20:49,998 霸子說到做到 391 00:20:50,165 --> 00:20:51,959 沒有爆雷 392 00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:55,462 在首映當天,大家終於看到電影 393 00:20:55,671 --> 00:20:57,589 並充滿了喜悅 394 00:20:57,965 --> 00:21:02,678 然後立刻拿出手機爆雷 395 00:21:45,971 --> 00:21:48,640 謝謝觀賞 396 00:21:48,724 --> 00:21:50,934 翻譯:SDI Media