1 00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:02,502 ♪ ♪ 2 00:00:02,585 --> 00:00:04,337 Aah! 3 00:00:08,383 --> 00:00:10,552 D'oh! 4 00:00:10,635 --> 00:00:12,178 (grunts) 5 00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:16,433 Hmm? D'oh! 6 00:00:23,106 --> 00:00:25,775 -Here's your nuggets. -Chicken nuggets? 7 00:00:25,859 --> 00:00:27,610 Yes. 8 00:00:27,694 --> 00:00:30,363 Including things that ate or were eaten by a chicken. 9 00:00:30,447 --> 00:00:33,742 Mmm, chicken nuggets. 10 00:00:35,952 --> 00:00:37,203 ♪ Chicken nugget ♪ 11 00:00:37,287 --> 00:00:40,290 ♪ I like to eat you while I drive ♪ 12 00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:42,834 ♪ 'Cause you guys and french fries ♪ 13 00:00:42,917 --> 00:00:45,170 ♪ Are the perfect breakfast ♪ 14 00:00:45,253 --> 00:00:47,630 -♪ She's living in L.A. ♪ -(shouts) 15 00:00:47,714 --> 00:00:50,800 ♪ With my best old ex-friend Ray ♪ 16 00:00:50,884 --> 00:00:54,220 ♪ Isn't that the way the nugget taste ♪ 17 00:00:54,304 --> 00:00:56,389 ♪ Well, let's forget all that ♪ 18 00:00:56,473 --> 00:01:00,185 -♪ And give me some coleslaw if you can find it ♪ -Idiot! 19 00:01:00,268 --> 00:01:02,062 ♪ You've been so much more than kind ♪ 20 00:01:02,145 --> 00:01:04,189 ♪ You can keep the dime. ♪ 21 00:01:04,272 --> 00:01:05,774 (crying) 22 00:01:08,318 --> 00:01:09,486 (chokes) 23 00:01:09,569 --> 00:01:11,571 Hi, Don. 24 00:01:11,654 --> 00:01:13,281 (grunting) 25 00:01:14,824 --> 00:01:16,826 (sighs) 26 00:01:18,119 --> 00:01:20,038 D'oh! 27 00:01:20,121 --> 00:01:22,165 Any Joe Billionaire can have a Fabergé egg. 28 00:01:22,248 --> 00:01:24,918 I have the only Fabergé chicken. 29 00:01:25,001 --> 00:01:26,920 (Homer screaming in distance) 30 00:01:27,003 --> 00:01:29,297 (screaming grows louder) 31 00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:32,008 -You're fired. -Hmm? 32 00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:34,385 Okay, fine. You know what? 33 00:01:34,469 --> 00:01:36,429 This is just the kick in the pants I need 34 00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:37,806 to turn my life around. 35 00:01:37,889 --> 00:01:39,557 If you're gonna turn that body around, 36 00:01:39,641 --> 00:01:41,184 I suggest you do it in shifts. 37 00:01:41,267 --> 00:01:43,353 (laughs) 38 00:01:43,436 --> 00:01:45,605 Oh, and, uh, Mr. Burns? 39 00:01:45,688 --> 00:01:48,066 You are a crazy, wrinkly, 40 00:01:48,149 --> 00:01:51,361 short piece of garbage. 41 00:01:51,444 --> 00:01:53,696 I thought I was tall. 42 00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:57,617 I'm really, really getting tired of this. 43 00:01:57,700 --> 00:02:00,078 The losing the jobs. The going to Moe's. 44 00:02:00,161 --> 00:02:02,413 The Halloween bucket by the bed. 45 00:02:02,497 --> 00:02:05,291 And the licking of the deodorant sticks. 46 00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:07,377 They're not Popsicles. 47 00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:08,837 Mint is mint. 48 00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:11,422 Also, we have to start these lists earlier. 49 00:02:11,506 --> 00:02:13,049 It's almost midnight. 50 00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:15,176 Marge, look, I'm really, really trying. 51 00:02:15,260 --> 00:02:17,011 I've applied to every place in town, 52 00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:18,596 even Lisa's lemonade stand. 53 00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:20,306 You drank half the lemonade. 54 00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:23,601 I can't endorse a product unless I use the product. 55 00:02:23,685 --> 00:02:27,272 The proceeds were going to the National Endowment for the Arts. 56 00:02:27,355 --> 00:02:29,399 It was 80% of their funding. 57 00:02:29,482 --> 00:02:31,818 (sighs, grumbles) 58 00:02:31,901 --> 00:02:34,404 You need to find another job. 59 00:02:34,487 --> 00:02:38,158 But I found a new passion: watching Korean soap operas. 60 00:02:38,241 --> 00:02:40,076 Look, see there? Soon-Jip is in love 61 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,288 with the one boy her father has forbidden her to see: 62 00:02:43,371 --> 00:02:46,249 pop star Johnny Pop. 63 00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:48,960 (groans): Oh... 64 00:02:49,043 --> 00:02:51,337 -Out of a job? You're in luck. -(gasps) 65 00:02:51,421 --> 00:02:55,091 The high-tech start-up company CarGo is moving to Springfield. 66 00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:56,676 I'm proud to announce that we beat out 67 00:02:56,759 --> 00:02:58,219 50 other hopeless cities. 68 00:02:58,303 --> 00:03:00,180 Eat our rust, Toledo. 69 00:03:00,263 --> 00:03:02,849 What does the city gain from this deal? 70 00:03:02,932 --> 00:03:06,269 Jobs, eight to 12 jobs. 71 00:03:06,352 --> 00:03:08,855 Okay, Marge, you see that? 72 00:03:08,938 --> 00:03:11,733 It's a sign. I'm gonna get one of those jobs. 73 00:03:11,816 --> 00:03:13,818 -(chuckles): Yes, you will... -(gasps) 74 00:03:13,902 --> 00:03:15,278 ...says our self-help guru 75 00:03:15,361 --> 00:03:17,614 in our next segment on positive thinking. 76 00:03:17,697 --> 00:03:20,909 Oh, TV never talks to just me. 77 00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:24,537 Homer, CarGo is on the forefront 78 00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:26,581 of autonomous vehicle technology. 79 00:03:26,664 --> 00:03:28,583 We're looking for highly passive humans 80 00:03:28,666 --> 00:03:31,669 to road test our self-driving cars. 81 00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:34,756 Perfect answer. 82 00:03:34,839 --> 00:03:37,383 Yes, you could not be more passive, could you? 83 00:03:37,467 --> 00:03:39,844 And your bad driving record is a big, big plus. 84 00:03:39,928 --> 00:03:42,764 You've apparently never used your blinkers. 85 00:03:42,847 --> 00:03:46,309 What direction I want to go is my business and no one else's. 86 00:03:46,392 --> 00:03:48,353 USA! USA! 87 00:03:48,436 --> 00:03:51,814 And somehow you've driven over yourself. Amazing. 88 00:03:51,898 --> 00:03:55,026 Is there anything we don't know about you that we should? 89 00:03:55,109 --> 00:03:58,071 Well, I'd like you to know sometimes my road rage 90 00:03:58,154 --> 00:04:01,491 is actually home rage that I bring onto the highway. 91 00:04:01,574 --> 00:04:04,702 Now let's take a look at your license. 92 00:04:05,703 --> 00:04:08,122 Who exactly are they warning? 93 00:04:08,206 --> 00:04:11,584 My sisters-in-law work at the DMV. 94 00:04:11,668 --> 00:04:13,127 -Mm. Mm-hmm. -Mm-hmm. 95 00:04:13,211 --> 00:04:15,672 Congratulations, everyone. You're our finalists. 96 00:04:15,755 --> 00:04:18,508 We just have one last test for all of you. 97 00:04:18,591 --> 00:04:21,010 Who's capable of sitting for hours at a time, 98 00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:23,137 doing absolutely nothing? 99 00:04:23,221 --> 00:04:26,099 Finally, a job interview question I can answer. 100 00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:38,903 (goat bleats) 101 00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:45,159 -You're hired. -You're hired. 102 00:04:45,243 --> 00:04:47,161 Five more minutes. 103 00:04:47,245 --> 00:04:50,832 Wow, there's no steering wheel. How do I steer? 104 00:04:50,915 --> 00:04:53,626 No, it's a self-driving car. 105 00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:55,753 Oh, I've never driven one of those before. 106 00:04:55,837 --> 00:04:58,923 You don't have to. The car drives itself. 107 00:04:59,007 --> 00:05:01,759 Awesome, awesome. So is it, like, a joystick 108 00:05:01,843 --> 00:05:04,929 or, like, a turning wheel for steering? 109 00:05:05,013 --> 00:05:06,764 You just tell it where to go. 110 00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:09,017 Oh, I speak into the steering wheel. 111 00:05:09,100 --> 00:05:11,019 Antoine, check this out. 112 00:05:11,102 --> 00:05:13,021 The car is driving by itself. 113 00:05:13,104 --> 00:05:14,772 -I'm a genius. -Now you're free 114 00:05:14,856 --> 00:05:17,650 -to do whatever you like, Homer. -Can I text while it's driving? 115 00:05:17,734 --> 00:05:19,902 You can write a novel while you're driving. 116 00:05:19,986 --> 00:05:21,279 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 117 00:05:21,362 --> 00:05:23,448 In today's publishing environment? 118 00:05:23,531 --> 00:05:25,700 -Hmm. -Will you look at that? 119 00:05:25,783 --> 00:05:27,452 The car is driving Homer. 120 00:05:27,535 --> 00:05:29,370 Oh, as far as I'm concerned, 121 00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:33,166 I would never forfeit my control of the wheel. (burps) 122 00:05:33,249 --> 00:05:35,752 Whoa, Homer's making a smoothie while he drives. 123 00:05:35,835 --> 00:05:37,420 I want to make smoothies when I drive. 124 00:05:37,503 --> 00:05:39,005 You don't like smoothies. 125 00:05:39,088 --> 00:05:41,215 I want to make them. I don't want to drink them. 126 00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:46,929 HOMER: ♪ No operator ♪ 127 00:05:47,013 --> 00:05:50,058 ♪ The car just drives itself ♪ 128 00:05:50,141 --> 00:05:54,562 ♪ Its computer brain knows where the roads are ♪ 129 00:05:54,645 --> 00:05:56,356 ♪ Living in L.A. ♪ 130 00:05:56,439 --> 00:05:59,484 ♪ With my best old ex-friend Ray ♪ 131 00:05:59,567 --> 00:06:01,486 (Homer crying) 132 00:06:01,569 --> 00:06:05,406 ♪ Isn't that the way that this car goes ♪ 133 00:06:05,490 --> 00:06:07,909 ♪ You don't do a thing ♪ 134 00:06:07,992 --> 00:06:11,704 ♪ And where is the seat belt, 'cause I can't find it. ♪ 135 00:06:15,666 --> 00:06:18,920 Eight hours pay for riding in a car? 136 00:06:19,003 --> 00:06:21,339 Good-bye, rat race. 137 00:06:21,422 --> 00:06:22,757 Got to go, guys. 138 00:06:22,840 --> 00:06:25,593 Marge is here in her yesterday-mobile. 139 00:06:25,676 --> 00:06:27,136 -Ready, sweetie? -Almost. 140 00:06:27,220 --> 00:06:28,846 They're just finishing up my banh mi. 141 00:06:28,930 --> 00:06:31,224 That's what tech people call sandwiches. 142 00:06:31,307 --> 00:06:32,642 Here you go, sir. 143 00:06:32,725 --> 00:06:35,269 (laughs): He forgot to charge me. 144 00:06:35,353 --> 00:06:38,189 Oh, no, sir, it's free. All the food here is free. 145 00:06:38,272 --> 00:06:41,442 Free food? At work? Are you serious? 146 00:06:41,526 --> 00:06:42,610 I sure am. 147 00:06:42,693 --> 00:06:45,780 (crying): Marge, I need a moment. 148 00:06:46,781 --> 00:06:49,575 ("Pure Imagination" playing) 149 00:06:59,710 --> 00:07:01,337 (laughing) 150 00:07:01,421 --> 00:07:02,922 One for me. One for the tray. 151 00:07:03,005 --> 00:07:05,216 Oh, Marge would love this. (laughs) 152 00:07:05,299 --> 00:07:08,678 Something for the kids. (laughs) 153 00:07:08,761 --> 00:07:11,806 -Ooh. -(sizzling) 154 00:07:11,889 --> 00:07:15,143 Take the day off. 155 00:07:15,226 --> 00:07:18,563 Homie, when you lost your job, I was so worried. 156 00:07:18,646 --> 00:07:21,691 But this is the nicest place to work I've ever seen. 157 00:07:21,774 --> 00:07:25,319 -Come on, let me show you around the campus. -Hmm. 158 00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:28,406 There's the gym, which has never been used. 159 00:07:28,489 --> 00:07:31,075 Indoor Ferris wheel, never Ferrised. 160 00:07:31,159 --> 00:07:33,161 Then there's the rock climbing wall, 161 00:07:33,244 --> 00:07:34,579 still in the wrapper. 162 00:07:36,247 --> 00:07:38,332 How come no one uses these things? 163 00:07:38,416 --> 00:07:40,376 All these coders never stop working. 164 00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:42,712 Oh, we should help them enjoy themselves. 165 00:07:42,795 --> 00:07:44,714 -Hey, nerd. -Yes? -Yes. 166 00:07:44,797 --> 00:07:45,840 -Yes. -Yeah. -Yeah. 167 00:07:45,923 --> 00:07:47,175 -Yeah? -Yes. -Yes. 168 00:07:47,258 --> 00:07:48,801 -Yes. -Yes. -Huh, yes? 169 00:07:48,885 --> 00:07:50,052 No, I just meant... 170 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:52,388 Okay, fine, all of you. Come down here. 171 00:07:52,472 --> 00:07:54,015 -I'll log off. -Log off. -Log off. 172 00:07:54,098 --> 00:07:55,391 -Log off. -Log off. -Log off. 173 00:07:55,475 --> 00:07:57,226 -Log off. -Log off. -Log... off. 174 00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:59,061 -Log off. -Log off. 175 00:07:59,145 --> 00:08:00,771 Come on, Team Blue. 176 00:08:00,855 --> 00:08:02,940 Go, Team Bald. 177 00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:06,402 (all cheering) 178 00:08:08,362 --> 00:08:10,406 Look at Homer and his surprisingly slim wife 179 00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:12,033 leading that team building exercise. 180 00:08:12,116 --> 00:08:14,619 Let's check the real-time brain imaging. 181 00:08:14,702 --> 00:08:17,371 (gasps) Their creative centers have gone indigo. 182 00:08:17,455 --> 00:08:19,832 -Is that good? -It ain't scarlet. 183 00:08:19,916 --> 00:08:21,626 Homer and Marge, what you two did 184 00:08:21,709 --> 00:08:24,253 to inspire our workers was paradigm blasting. 185 00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:27,131 I'm sorry. We'll replace the paradigm. 186 00:08:27,215 --> 00:08:29,175 No, no. It's good. 187 00:08:29,258 --> 00:08:32,220 We want to be number one in employee satisfaction. 188 00:08:32,303 --> 00:08:34,972 -And money. -We have the competition by the nuts. 189 00:08:35,056 --> 00:08:38,017 We bought the last affordable housing in San Francisco. 190 00:08:38,100 --> 00:08:40,853 And Alcatraz has gone condo. 191 00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:44,315 Homer, we're offering you a promotion 192 00:08:44,398 --> 00:08:46,317 and making Marge your partner. 193 00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:47,652 -Oh. -(chuckles) 194 00:08:47,735 --> 00:08:50,988 We need people like you to help our workers relax. 195 00:08:51,072 --> 00:08:55,201 Have fun and forget they may want or have families. 196 00:08:55,284 --> 00:08:56,911 So, what do you say? Are you in? 197 00:08:56,994 --> 00:08:58,913 Homie, for the first time in our marriage, 198 00:08:58,996 --> 00:09:01,165 we can work together as a team. 199 00:09:01,249 --> 00:09:04,627 Yeah, well, I'll have to check with my wife. 200 00:09:04,710 --> 00:09:07,588 -I'd love to. -She said yes! 201 00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:14,762 Uh, yes, I'll have one of those coffees 202 00:09:14,845 --> 00:09:16,889 that's actually a milkshake, please. 203 00:09:16,973 --> 00:09:20,268 Okay, so, what kind of cow would you like your milk from? 204 00:09:20,351 --> 00:09:22,728 Barnyard basic, collegiate mascot, 205 00:09:22,812 --> 00:09:24,647 Minnesota full-fat...? 206 00:09:24,730 --> 00:09:27,984 At the cereal bar, you can request nothing but prizes. 207 00:09:28,067 --> 00:09:30,194 The only thing I don't like 208 00:09:30,278 --> 00:09:32,738 is how I don't understand what everyone is saying. 209 00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:35,157 Uh, yeah, is that the, uh, new X4P1? 210 00:09:35,241 --> 00:09:37,952 Yeah, but 18-core doesn't play nice with the motherboard 211 00:09:38,035 --> 00:09:39,161 unless you overclock. 212 00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:40,788 So, Lisa, what does that mean? 213 00:09:40,871 --> 00:09:42,748 -I don't know. -You don't know? 214 00:09:42,832 --> 00:09:45,251 -No. -(singsongy): You're as stupid as I am. 215 00:09:45,334 --> 00:09:47,378 You're as stupid as I am. 216 00:09:47,461 --> 00:09:48,921 Mom! 217 00:09:49,005 --> 00:09:50,506 (chuckles): Kids, kids, 218 00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:53,843 you're both stupid in your own special ways. 219 00:09:53,926 --> 00:09:56,220 Bart's much stupider than I am. 220 00:09:56,304 --> 00:09:59,515 Oh, good girl. Let your brother win. 221 00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:01,517 Good morning, everybody. 222 00:10:01,601 --> 00:10:03,686 I made lemon squares. 223 00:10:03,769 --> 00:10:06,105 Some, if not most, appear to be rhombuses. 224 00:10:06,188 --> 00:10:08,858 -Rhombi. -Both are acceptable. 225 00:10:08,941 --> 00:10:11,611 That was so fun. Thank-thank you, Marge. 226 00:10:11,694 --> 00:10:13,279 What? You didn't even eat them. 227 00:10:13,362 --> 00:10:16,198 Well, you'll really be thrilled with what we just found. 228 00:10:16,282 --> 00:10:19,869 There's a regulation hockey rink on campus. 229 00:10:19,952 --> 00:10:23,831 -Oh. Whoa. Whoa. -Aah! -Aah! 230 00:10:23,914 --> 00:10:27,084 It's amazing how not a single one of them can skate. 231 00:10:28,127 --> 00:10:31,213 Ow! Physical activity makes me so sad. 232 00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:34,884 Oh, no. Doug's in the worst position of all: fetal. 233 00:10:34,967 --> 00:10:36,761 I know what'll cheer us all up. 234 00:10:36,844 --> 00:10:38,179 The Christmas song that was written 235 00:10:38,262 --> 00:10:40,181 by an A.I. program. 236 00:10:40,264 --> 00:10:43,934 ROBOTIC VOICE: ♪ I swear, it is Christmas Eve ♪ 237 00:10:44,018 --> 00:10:47,938 ♪ I hope that is what you say ♪ 238 00:10:48,022 --> 00:10:49,357 ♪ ♪ 239 00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:52,902 ♪ The best Christmas present in the world ♪ 240 00:10:52,985 --> 00:10:54,570 ♪ Is a blessing... ♪ 241 00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:55,988 -(music stops) -Okay, stop. Stop, stop, stop. 242 00:10:56,072 --> 00:10:57,573 I have a better idea. 243 00:10:57,657 --> 00:10:59,992 (all laughing) 244 00:11:00,076 --> 00:11:03,537 Guys, you'll never guess where I'm calling you from: work. 245 00:11:03,621 --> 00:11:05,581 That's work? What are we doing here? 246 00:11:05,665 --> 00:11:07,208 Let's check it out. I got a feeling 247 00:11:07,291 --> 00:11:10,586 there's greener pastures just outside this door. 248 00:11:13,172 --> 00:11:14,757 (howling) 249 00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:17,885 Huh, that used to be a Baskin-Robbins. 250 00:11:17,968 --> 00:11:20,930 ♪ ♪ 251 00:11:21,013 --> 00:11:22,556 Oh, my God. 252 00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:24,392 I'm actually happy at work. 253 00:11:24,475 --> 00:11:28,396 I haven't looked at my watch in seven minutes and 23 seconds. 254 00:11:28,479 --> 00:11:31,315 And I'm optimistic about our future. 255 00:11:31,399 --> 00:11:33,275 You say that like it's the first time. 256 00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:35,569 Well, there was that time I had the first number right 257 00:11:35,653 --> 00:11:37,154 on the Powerball. 258 00:11:37,238 --> 00:11:39,281 That was a great day. 259 00:11:39,365 --> 00:11:41,784 Remember? 27. 260 00:11:41,867 --> 00:11:43,786 Mm, 27. 261 00:11:43,869 --> 00:11:46,288 I chose it because that's how much money we had in the bank, 262 00:11:46,372 --> 00:11:49,792 -27 cents. -Aw. 263 00:11:49,875 --> 00:11:51,794 Mm. Hmm? 264 00:11:51,877 --> 00:11:55,089 Hmm. Mmm. Mm. 265 00:11:56,882 --> 00:11:59,510 Smithers, what happened to our workers? 266 00:11:59,593 --> 00:12:02,012 Well, apparently, this new self-driving car company 267 00:12:02,096 --> 00:12:03,556 is poaching our employees. 268 00:12:03,639 --> 00:12:06,434 They do have an excellent LGBT policy. 269 00:12:06,517 --> 00:12:07,810 What's that stand for-- 270 00:12:07,893 --> 00:12:10,438 lazy goof-off buffoons? And transgender. 271 00:12:10,521 --> 00:12:12,189 All right, Smithers, what's say you and I 272 00:12:12,273 --> 00:12:13,941 go undercover and check out this company. 273 00:12:14,024 --> 00:12:16,819 You're fluent in SQL, Python and JavaScript. 274 00:12:16,902 --> 00:12:19,196 Three years in Google's A.I. division. 275 00:12:19,280 --> 00:12:23,200 Wow. These are very impressive résumés for 22-year-olds. 276 00:12:23,284 --> 00:12:24,827 We're in. 277 00:12:24,910 --> 00:12:27,663 Tugs-of-war? Iced cream? 278 00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:29,874 (laughs) I could never offer this. 279 00:12:29,957 --> 00:12:31,459 You could if you just deferred 280 00:12:31,542 --> 00:12:33,169 one-half percent of your compensation. 281 00:12:33,252 --> 00:12:35,171 I could never offer this. 282 00:12:35,254 --> 00:12:36,547 (sniffs) 283 00:12:36,630 --> 00:12:39,091 (sniffing) 284 00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:41,552 Smithers, do you realize how brilliant this is? 285 00:12:41,635 --> 00:12:43,053 Instead of paying them more, 286 00:12:43,137 --> 00:12:44,555 they make the workplace pleasant, 287 00:12:44,638 --> 00:12:47,600 so the employees never want to leave. 288 00:12:47,683 --> 00:12:49,685 I can never beat this. 289 00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:53,272 -Sorry. -It happens. 290 00:12:55,399 --> 00:12:57,485 Let's go home, please. 291 00:12:57,568 --> 00:12:58,986 Okay, here's what I've been thinking. 292 00:12:59,069 --> 00:13:01,113 A special day where everyone dresses 293 00:13:01,197 --> 00:13:03,073 like their favorite superheroes. 294 00:13:03,157 --> 00:13:06,160 Oh, yeah. We can make hero sandwiches. 295 00:13:06,243 --> 00:13:09,705 You know what I love about working with you? Everything. 296 00:13:09,789 --> 00:13:11,791 (tires screech) 297 00:13:11,874 --> 00:13:13,793 Wait a minute, this isn't home. 298 00:13:13,876 --> 00:13:15,461 That's so weird. 299 00:13:15,544 --> 00:13:17,671 You just mentioned hero sandwiches. 300 00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:20,049 It's almost like the car was listening to us. 301 00:13:20,132 --> 00:13:22,176 Yeah. Let's test this out. 302 00:13:22,259 --> 00:13:25,346 Say, Marge, I could go for some doughnuts. 303 00:13:25,429 --> 00:13:27,139 -(tires screech) -Hmm. 304 00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:30,059 I'm so hungry I could eat a horse. 305 00:13:31,101 --> 00:13:32,895 -Mm. -Holy crap. 306 00:13:35,022 --> 00:13:38,984 This company is up to some kind of monkey business. 307 00:13:39,068 --> 00:13:41,904 There's a problem with the driverless car. 308 00:13:41,987 --> 00:13:44,615 (monkeys chittering) 309 00:13:44,698 --> 00:13:47,159 Oh, there's no problem. It's our sponsored rides program. 310 00:13:47,243 --> 00:13:49,495 The cars passively combine your conversations, 311 00:13:49,578 --> 00:13:51,497 facial expressions and data we stole from Equifax 312 00:13:51,580 --> 00:13:53,290 to determine which of our corporate sponsors 313 00:13:53,374 --> 00:13:54,625 to take you to. 314 00:13:54,708 --> 00:13:56,418 Corporate sponsors? What the...? 315 00:13:56,502 --> 00:13:59,046 Don't you make enough money giving out cars for free? 316 00:13:59,129 --> 00:14:02,049 Do you think dating sites want you to meet other people? 317 00:14:02,132 --> 00:14:04,218 They want your data. 318 00:14:04,301 --> 00:14:06,178 That's what all websites want. 319 00:14:06,262 --> 00:14:08,639 Not DataGrab.net. 320 00:14:08,722 --> 00:14:09,932 -Yep. -(gasps) 321 00:14:10,015 --> 00:14:11,642 And you can't stop us. 322 00:14:11,725 --> 00:14:14,144 When you joined, you signed nondisclosure agreements, 323 00:14:14,228 --> 00:14:15,855 which nobody ever reads. 324 00:14:18,065 --> 00:14:19,942 You don't want to mess with us. 325 00:14:20,025 --> 00:14:21,902 We have lawyers that were crossbred with wolves. 326 00:14:21,986 --> 00:14:23,988 Well, you prepare to hear from a guy 327 00:14:24,071 --> 00:14:26,615 pretending to be my lawyer, probably Moe. 328 00:14:26,699 --> 00:14:30,119 Now I'm gonna defiantly exit on this moving walkway. 329 00:14:30,202 --> 00:14:32,371 Good day. 330 00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:38,377 I should have gotten off. 331 00:14:41,714 --> 00:14:44,675 So, my client, uh, Homer Simpson, is suing youse. 332 00:14:44,758 --> 00:14:46,302 I am not a pretend attorney, 333 00:14:46,385 --> 00:14:49,889 I am Homer's liar. Lawyer. Good-bye. 334 00:14:54,935 --> 00:14:58,898 That wasn't the kind of coke I was talking about. 335 00:15:01,317 --> 00:15:03,903 Ugh... 336 00:15:03,986 --> 00:15:06,614 Seymour, you're driving too fast. 337 00:15:06,697 --> 00:15:09,199 Mother, it's a self-driving car. 338 00:15:09,283 --> 00:15:10,784 Keep your eyes on the road! 339 00:15:10,868 --> 00:15:12,828 Aw, what am I gonna do with you? 340 00:15:12,912 --> 00:15:14,371 (tires squeal) 341 00:15:14,455 --> 00:15:16,415 Look, they take our insurance. 342 00:15:17,458 --> 00:15:19,168 Marge, I can't believe they invaded 343 00:15:19,251 --> 00:15:21,128 the sanctity of my car. 344 00:15:21,211 --> 00:15:23,255 I mean, what's next? Alexa? 345 00:15:23,339 --> 00:15:25,507 ALEXA: Alexa is only here to help. 346 00:15:25,591 --> 00:15:27,635 Ordering calming tea. 347 00:15:27,718 --> 00:15:30,846 Thank you, Alexa. Now, on the one hand, 348 00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:33,140 we know they're manipulating people. 349 00:15:33,223 --> 00:15:36,769 But who gives a darn when working there is so much fun? 350 00:15:36,852 --> 00:15:38,646 Huh? Huh? 351 00:15:38,729 --> 00:15:40,981 Marge, I can't be the ethical one. 352 00:15:41,065 --> 00:15:42,608 ALEXA: That's right, he can't. 353 00:15:42,691 --> 00:15:44,360 He has a secret Alexa. 354 00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:46,862 ALEXA 2: I'm only for cookies and Pop-Tarts. 355 00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:48,280 I'm going for a drive, 356 00:15:48,364 --> 00:15:50,532 in an old-fashioned freedom-mobile, 357 00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:55,454 with nobody tracking me except the apps on my phone. 358 00:15:56,872 --> 00:15:59,667 Mr. Burns? What are you doing here? 359 00:15:59,750 --> 00:16:02,795 I don't know. I was in one of those cursed robot cars 360 00:16:02,878 --> 00:16:04,713 saying I felt like a poisoned rat. 361 00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:07,466 And you wound up at Moe's. Well, uh, fancy that. 362 00:16:07,549 --> 00:16:10,886 Oh, buying those key words really paid off. 363 00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,513 (chuckling) 364 00:16:12,596 --> 00:16:16,517 There's no way to stop them, with their fleet of horseless, 365 00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:18,060 driverless carriages. 366 00:16:18,143 --> 00:16:19,687 You mean their cars? 367 00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:22,564 The cars. Yes, the whole town is besotted with them. 368 00:16:22,648 --> 00:16:24,400 If we could just shut down the cars, 369 00:16:24,483 --> 00:16:25,985 we'd kill the whole company. 370 00:16:26,068 --> 00:16:28,070 -Will you help me? -I will. 371 00:16:28,153 --> 00:16:30,406 That company is tricking us into buying things, 372 00:16:30,489 --> 00:16:33,492 and I don't like anybody telling me what to do. 373 00:16:33,575 --> 00:16:36,120 Yes, sir, Mr. Sign. 374 00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:38,497 ♪ ♪ 375 00:16:45,170 --> 00:16:46,755 Hey, we're all employees. 376 00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:49,133 Wouldn't it be less suspicious if we weren't skulking? 377 00:16:49,216 --> 00:16:50,968 Fine. 378 00:16:52,302 --> 00:16:54,346 All right, we need to get to the master computer 379 00:16:54,430 --> 00:16:55,848 and disable the cars. 380 00:16:57,725 --> 00:17:00,185 Simpson, you have a key to the main server room? 381 00:17:00,269 --> 00:17:03,856 No, but I do have a key to the Nerf-a-torium, 382 00:17:03,939 --> 00:17:07,985 which has a door to the main server room. 383 00:17:08,068 --> 00:17:11,030 I just need to reconfigure the deep neural net 384 00:17:11,113 --> 00:17:13,323 and disable the cars' fuel cells. 385 00:17:13,407 --> 00:17:16,577 They'll all stop dead, and the company will be ruined. 386 00:17:16,660 --> 00:17:19,163 -MARGE: No, you don't. -(Homer gasps) 387 00:17:19,246 --> 00:17:21,999 Homer, you want to destroy the best thing 388 00:17:22,082 --> 00:17:23,667 that ever happened to us? 389 00:17:23,751 --> 00:17:25,252 Except for the three kids, of course. 390 00:17:25,335 --> 00:17:26,795 Obviously the three kids. 391 00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:28,589 Marge, listen to yourself. 392 00:17:28,672 --> 00:17:31,091 These cars are stealing our lives. 393 00:17:31,175 --> 00:17:33,469 But-but we have a contract, 394 00:17:33,552 --> 00:17:36,472 (crying): and we're having so much fun. 395 00:17:40,142 --> 00:17:43,687 (sniffles) Mm. Guys? 396 00:17:43,771 --> 00:17:45,272 We have a situation. 397 00:17:45,355 --> 00:17:47,816 What does that mean? 398 00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:49,943 It's the next step from sponsored rides. 399 00:17:50,027 --> 00:17:53,572 Why eavesdrop on people only when they're in their cars? 400 00:17:53,655 --> 00:17:57,576 We're moving the microphone from the car to the fob. 401 00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:03,165 That goes everywhere. Even the powder room. 402 00:18:03,248 --> 00:18:06,001 Um, we call it the unisex voiditorium. 403 00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:09,213 MARGE: What am I doing here? 404 00:18:09,296 --> 00:18:13,217 There. I just have to push this one button, 405 00:18:13,300 --> 00:18:15,135 and the cars are disabled. 406 00:18:15,219 --> 00:18:17,554 Release the pound... sign. 407 00:18:17,638 --> 00:18:20,432 Don't touch that button. You'll leave fingerprints. 408 00:18:20,516 --> 00:18:22,476 Allow me. 409 00:18:22,559 --> 00:18:25,145 Marge, you've come over to the side of good. 410 00:18:25,229 --> 00:18:26,897 That's right, for the first time ever, 411 00:18:26,980 --> 00:18:28,857 I'm the lesser of two evils. 412 00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:30,067 (powering down) 413 00:18:30,150 --> 00:18:32,653 Good Lord! 414 00:18:32,736 --> 00:18:36,240 This autopia has become a not-topia. 415 00:18:36,323 --> 00:18:37,533 Is that a thing? 416 00:18:37,616 --> 00:18:40,327 Nothing like eating fish sticks. 417 00:18:40,410 --> 00:18:42,621 (cat meows) 418 00:18:42,704 --> 00:18:44,790 -(cats yowling) -Ow, my eyes! Aah! 419 00:18:44,873 --> 00:18:46,959 The car won't move! Can't get out! 420 00:18:47,042 --> 00:18:50,212 (on radio): ♪ I've been to paradise... ♪ 421 00:18:50,295 --> 00:18:51,421 Not this song! 422 00:18:51,505 --> 00:18:53,924 ♪ ...never been to me. ♪ 423 00:18:55,259 --> 00:18:59,471 Excellent. And now, we just bide our time. 424 00:19:03,642 --> 00:19:05,936 -That didn't take long. -Look, Mr. Burns, 425 00:19:06,019 --> 00:19:08,272 you've seen how Marge and I work great together. 426 00:19:08,355 --> 00:19:10,774 Would you consider hiring her at the power plant? 427 00:19:10,858 --> 00:19:12,526 A woman? (laughs) 428 00:19:12,609 --> 00:19:14,403 I don't believe in the perils of personal attraction 429 00:19:14,486 --> 00:19:15,529 at the workplace. 430 00:19:15,612 --> 00:19:17,990 -Right, Smithers? -Ah... 431 00:19:18,073 --> 00:19:20,159 Unfortunately for you and your family, Simpson, 432 00:19:20,242 --> 00:19:22,661 it just registered in my memory that you called me 433 00:19:22,744 --> 00:19:27,666 a crazy, wrinkly, short piece of garbage. 434 00:19:32,838 --> 00:19:34,214 (groans) 435 00:19:34,298 --> 00:19:35,382 Aah! 436 00:19:40,137 --> 00:19:41,263 You were saying? 437 00:19:41,346 --> 00:19:43,432 ♪ Toot-toot-tootsie, good-bye ♪ 438 00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:45,934 ♪ Toot-toot-tootsie, don't cry ♪ 439 00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:48,478 ♪ The choo-choo train that takes me ♪ 440 00:19:48,562 --> 00:19:50,564 ♪ Away from you, no words can say ♪ 441 00:19:50,647 --> 00:19:51,982 ♪ The heart, it breaks me... ♪ 442 00:19:52,065 --> 00:19:54,735 Let's leave them be. 443 00:19:54,818 --> 00:19:56,153 Now, let's go home, 444 00:19:56,236 --> 00:19:59,531 self-driving the old-fashioned way. 445 00:20:02,159 --> 00:20:05,746 That's right, none of that unreliable technology. 446 00:20:05,829 --> 00:20:07,998 Just a good old human driver. 447 00:20:12,294 --> 00:20:14,713 Okay, this was a bump in the road, but I have a new way in 448 00:20:14,796 --> 00:20:17,591 to consumers: talking tattoos. 449 00:20:17,674 --> 00:20:19,218 Duff Mexicana. 450 00:20:19,301 --> 00:20:22,179 Para que el sur del sabor de la frontera. 451 00:20:22,262 --> 00:20:23,513 O si! 452 00:20:23,597 --> 00:20:27,100 (all murmuring excitedly) 453 00:20:27,184 --> 00:20:28,602 (toots) 454 00:20:34,107 --> 00:20:37,361 I'm putting this car in snuggle mode. 455 00:20:39,780 --> 00:20:41,782 (romantic music playing) 456 00:20:45,035 --> 00:20:48,121 Oh, I'm gonna snuggle you, baby, 457 00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:51,375 all red light long, baby. 458 00:20:51,458 --> 00:20:56,046 That's right, this song features no actual singing. 459 00:20:56,129 --> 00:20:59,258 -Oh, yeah. Uh-huh. -Oh! 460 00:20:59,341 --> 00:21:00,550 (chuckles) 461 00:21:00,634 --> 00:21:03,387 (both moaning) 462 00:21:03,470 --> 00:21:05,264 (tires screech) 463 00:21:06,515 --> 00:21:08,350 Oh, for God's sake. 464 00:21:14,147 --> 00:21:16,692 Shh! 465 00:21:19,069 --> 00:21:21,029 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH