1 00:00:03,003 --> 00:00:06,214 -CHOIR: ♪ The Simpsons ♪ -Take that, kite-eating tree. 2 00:00:10,260 --> 00:00:12,095 (exclaiming) 3 00:00:16,558 --> 00:00:18,518 (school bell ringing) 4 00:00:21,146 --> 00:00:22,230 Morning! 5 00:00:23,189 --> 00:00:25,650 -(whistle blows) -(yells) 6 00:00:30,447 --> 00:00:31,781 (beeping) 7 00:00:36,411 --> 00:00:39,039 (playing the blues) 8 00:00:40,206 --> 00:00:43,543 (playing the blues) 9 00:00:44,377 --> 00:00:46,129 (tires screeching) 10 00:00:48,256 --> 00:00:49,466 -(horn honking) -(exclaiming) 11 00:00:50,341 --> 00:00:51,885 (tires screeching) 12 00:00:53,678 --> 00:00:54,637 D'oh! 13 00:00:54,721 --> 00:00:55,764 (tires screeching) 14 00:00:55,847 --> 00:00:57,432 (groans) 15 00:00:58,516 --> 00:01:00,518 (jaunty melody playing) 16 00:01:04,481 --> 00:01:05,690 (horn ooh-gahs) 17 00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:09,277 (upbeat orchestral melody playing) 18 00:01:19,662 --> 00:01:21,706 ♪ ♪ 19 00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:31,549 ♪ ♪ 20 00:01:38,223 --> 00:01:40,266 ♪ ♪ 21 00:01:47,107 --> 00:01:48,566 (sighing, groaning) 22 00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:49,818 (laughing) 23 00:01:59,911 --> 00:02:02,080 HOMER: ♪ Go to sleep ♪ 24 00:02:02,163 --> 00:02:03,998 ♪ Little Marge ♪ 25 00:02:04,082 --> 00:02:06,042 ♪ Close your eyes ♪ 26 00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:08,002 ♪ Start to yawn ♪ 27 00:02:08,086 --> 00:02:13,800 {\an8}♪ You will wake up with the dawn ♪ 28 00:02:13,883 --> 00:02:14,968 {\an8}(sucking) 29 00:02:15,051 --> 00:02:18,263 {\an8}♪ Dawn... ♪ 30 00:02:18,346 --> 00:02:19,264 {\an8}(sucking) 31 00:02:19,347 --> 00:02:22,267 {\an8}♪ Dawn... ♪ 32 00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:25,728 {\an8}♪ Dawn... ♪ 33 00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:26,855 {\an8}Large fries. 34 00:02:26,938 --> 00:02:28,439 {\an8}Yes, sir. 35 00:02:28,523 --> 00:02:29,649 {\an8}♪ Dawn... ♪ 36 00:02:29,732 --> 00:02:31,526 {\an8}(sucking) 37 00:02:33,903 --> 00:02:35,822 {\an8}MARGE (loudly): Did you get the baby to sleep? 38 00:02:35,905 --> 00:02:37,198 {\an8}-(sucking) -D'oh! 39 00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:39,617 {\an8}Oh, no. 40 00:02:39,701 --> 00:02:41,369 {\an8}Oh, I can't read that again. 41 00:02:41,452 --> 00:02:42,996 {\an8}I hate to see a wolf get punished 42 00:02:43,079 --> 00:02:45,790 {\an8}for having normal appetites. 43 00:02:45,874 --> 00:02:47,792 {\an8}I'll tell you a story that'll put you to sleep. 44 00:02:47,876 --> 00:02:49,627 {\an8}It's one your mother told me. 45 00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:52,755 {\an8}Luann Van Houten uses flavored Crisco 46 00:02:52,839 --> 00:02:55,592 {\an8}instead of butter for shortbread cookies. 47 00:02:55,675 --> 00:02:59,387 {\an8}(yawning) Which is, apparently, flakier, 48 00:02:59,470 --> 00:03:02,056 {\an8}but at what cost? 49 00:03:02,140 --> 00:03:04,392 {\an8}(yawning) And she... (muttering) 50 00:03:04,475 --> 00:03:07,312 {\an8}(snoring) 51 00:03:07,395 --> 00:03:09,189 {\an8}(Homer muttering) 52 00:03:09,272 --> 00:03:10,440 {\an8}HOMER: Wh...? Huh? 53 00:03:10,523 --> 00:03:11,649 {\an8}What the... ? 54 00:03:11,733 --> 00:03:14,819 {\an8}Okay, sweetie, I got a story about another little girl 55 00:03:14,903 --> 00:03:17,697 {\an8}who got lost in the woods, but it wasn't a girl, 56 00:03:17,780 --> 00:03:19,282 {\an8}and it wasn't the woods. 57 00:03:19,365 --> 00:03:20,533 {\an8}(sucking) 58 00:03:20,617 --> 00:03:22,118 {\an8}Suck, suck, indeed. 59 00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:24,037 {\an8}And it all happened once upon a time, 60 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:25,288 {\an8}before you were born, 61 00:03:25,371 --> 00:03:26,915 {\an8}and my chances for a man cave 62 00:03:26,998 --> 00:03:28,625 {\an8}went out the window. 63 00:03:28,708 --> 00:03:30,001 {\an8}(sucking) 64 00:03:36,216 --> 00:03:39,344 {\an8}Bless you all for sacrificing your Saturday afternoon 65 00:03:39,427 --> 00:03:42,180 {\an8}to help us clean up skid row. 66 00:03:42,263 --> 00:03:44,724 {\an8}When God came for Sunday, I said nothing. 67 00:03:44,807 --> 00:03:47,310 {\an8}Now he comes for Saturday. 68 00:03:47,393 --> 00:03:49,771 {\an8}Homer Simpson, it's one thing to moan and groan on the bus, 69 00:03:49,854 --> 00:03:51,522 {\an8}but in front of these unfortunates, 70 00:03:51,606 --> 00:03:54,108 {\an8}well, (scoffs) that just curls my 'stache. 71 00:03:56,027 --> 00:03:57,820 Hey, Flanders, why don't you take some advice 72 00:03:57,904 --> 00:03:59,697 from your Bible and zip it? 73 00:03:59,781 --> 00:04:01,532 Oh, where does the Bible say "zip it"? 74 00:04:01,616 --> 00:04:04,577 It's the first thing the burning bush said to Moses. 75 00:04:04,661 --> 00:04:06,621 Thank you for teaching us Scripture. 76 00:04:06,704 --> 00:04:08,706 Thank you. 77 00:04:12,627 --> 00:04:14,254 You know, all this helping others 78 00:04:14,337 --> 00:04:17,340 is giving me the most satisfying feeling ever. 79 00:04:17,423 --> 00:04:20,051 So satisfying. 80 00:04:20,134 --> 00:04:21,719 Uh, Lenny... 81 00:04:21,803 --> 00:04:23,346 Oh, huh. 82 00:04:23,429 --> 00:04:24,597 I get why they do it. 83 00:04:24,681 --> 00:04:25,640 Totally get it. 84 00:04:25,723 --> 00:04:27,267 (whimpers) 85 00:04:27,350 --> 00:04:31,479 Hey, Carl, you want to buy all my stuff for five dollars? 86 00:04:31,562 --> 00:04:33,231 (dog howling in distance) 87 00:04:33,314 --> 00:04:35,817 {\an8}Well, thank you all for spending the day 88 00:04:35,900 --> 00:04:38,987 {\an8}thinking of others instead of yourselves. 89 00:04:39,070 --> 00:04:41,072 Saturday. It was a Saturday. 90 00:04:41,155 --> 00:04:44,284 Now, a reward to the most selfless cleaner: 91 00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:47,120 a family vacation to the Grand Canyon. 92 00:04:47,203 --> 00:04:49,664 The winner: Ned Flanders. 93 00:04:49,747 --> 00:04:51,749 Surprise, surprise. 94 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:54,502 The guy that did the best job wins. 95 00:04:54,585 --> 00:04:55,920 {\an8}NED: Mm-hmm! 96 00:04:56,004 --> 00:04:58,381 {\an8}But this gift certificate is for two families. 97 00:04:58,464 --> 00:05:00,925 Hey, Reverend, we'd love it if you and Helen would join us. 98 00:05:01,009 --> 00:05:03,052 Um... uh... uh... 99 00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:05,013 Mm... 100 00:05:05,096 --> 00:05:06,723 Of course we'd love to join you, 101 00:05:06,806 --> 00:05:08,224 but I've noticed that you and Homer 102 00:05:08,308 --> 00:05:10,226 haven't been the friendliest "neighboreenos," 103 00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:12,854 if you get my diddly. 104 00:05:12,937 --> 00:05:16,190 Uh, well, Ned, I think the Lord would want you 105 00:05:16,274 --> 00:05:18,609 to take the Simpsons on this trip. 106 00:05:18,693 --> 00:05:19,569 Our Lord? 107 00:05:19,652 --> 00:05:21,487 Yes. Our Lord. 108 00:05:21,571 --> 00:05:24,073 For would it not indeed be glorious, 109 00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:25,825 if in visiting a natural chasm, 110 00:05:25,908 --> 00:05:29,162 two quarrelsome neighbors would bridge the chasm 111 00:05:29,245 --> 00:05:31,664 of their own discord. 112 00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:34,542 Well, I guess if Job could accept his burdens. 113 00:05:34,625 --> 00:05:36,085 Um, in America, 114 00:05:36,169 --> 00:05:38,546 it's pronounced "job," Flanders. 115 00:05:38,629 --> 00:05:40,006 (laughing) We can settle it when we're zipped up 116 00:05:40,089 --> 00:05:41,466 together in a sleeping bag. 117 00:05:41,549 --> 00:05:42,675 (groans) 118 00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:43,926 Welcome aboard. 119 00:05:44,010 --> 00:05:45,762 Oh, oh, we'd love to go, 120 00:05:45,845 --> 00:05:49,390 but is it such a good idea to travel with another family? 121 00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:52,393 It's fun. We travel with the Hibberts all the time. 122 00:05:52,477 --> 00:05:54,896 We ran into you once, in Cincinnati. 123 00:05:54,979 --> 00:05:56,147 And we had dinner. 124 00:05:56,230 --> 00:05:57,899 We slid our tables together. 125 00:05:57,982 --> 00:06:01,444 We were in a booth we could not get out of. 126 00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:04,197 (groaning sadly) 127 00:06:04,280 --> 00:06:05,698 Homie, we should go. 128 00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:08,409 You and Ned need to learn to get along. 129 00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:10,787 You said the same thing about me and Bart. 130 00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:14,082 No. The judge said the same thing about you and Bart. 131 00:06:14,165 --> 00:06:16,584 Judges. If they were any good, they'd be lawyers. 132 00:06:16,667 --> 00:06:17,794 Okay, we'll go. 133 00:06:17,877 --> 00:06:19,087 But if Flanders gets so annoying 134 00:06:19,170 --> 00:06:20,505 that I can't take it anymore, 135 00:06:20,588 --> 00:06:22,632 the code word is "octopus." 136 00:06:22,715 --> 00:06:24,092 Can it be something else? 137 00:06:24,175 --> 00:06:26,677 I don't like things with hidden beaks. 138 00:06:26,761 --> 00:06:29,180 Octopus or nothing. 139 00:06:29,263 --> 00:06:30,848 Okay. 140 00:06:30,932 --> 00:06:32,642 So we took eight-year-old Bart, 141 00:06:32,725 --> 00:06:34,894 and six-year-old Lisa. 142 00:06:34,977 --> 00:06:36,604 After ten hours of driving, 143 00:06:36,687 --> 00:06:39,690 I finally saw the most glorious site. 144 00:06:39,774 --> 00:06:41,401 (engine revs, tires screech) 145 00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:44,278 (groaning) 146 00:06:44,362 --> 00:06:48,658 HOMER: Ah... ah... ah... 147 00:06:48,741 --> 00:06:50,868 Ah... ah... 148 00:06:50,952 --> 00:06:55,832 Ahhh... 149 00:06:55,915 --> 00:06:57,250 (growls) 150 00:06:57,333 --> 00:06:58,751 Ah, ah, ah... 151 00:06:58,835 --> 00:07:04,006 Ah... oh... oh, oh, yeah. 152 00:07:04,090 --> 00:07:08,302 Ah... ah... yeah. 153 00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:10,054 (hums) 154 00:07:10,138 --> 00:07:11,806 (loud swallowing) 155 00:07:11,889 --> 00:07:14,308 (whimpering) 156 00:07:14,392 --> 00:07:15,560 Ah. 157 00:07:15,643 --> 00:07:17,478 MARGE: Oh. 158 00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:20,231 It's like Disneyland for thin people. 159 00:07:20,314 --> 00:07:23,151 {\an8}Did you know that the Grand Canyon was created by erosion? 160 00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:25,736 {\an8}And before 1871, it was called Big Canyon? 161 00:07:25,820 --> 00:07:26,988 {\an8}Okay, that's it. 162 00:07:27,071 --> 00:07:28,197 {\an8}We're on vacation. 163 00:07:28,281 --> 00:07:30,408 {\an8}-(crying) -Why, you little... 164 00:07:30,491 --> 00:07:32,660 (rattling) 165 00:07:32,743 --> 00:07:33,911 (both grunting) 166 00:07:37,373 --> 00:07:40,126 (both laughing) 167 00:07:41,836 --> 00:07:43,463 Whoa. 168 00:07:43,546 --> 00:07:46,299 Keep 'em coming, boy. 169 00:07:46,382 --> 00:07:47,550 Oh, ooh. 170 00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:49,177 That one stung me. (laughing) 171 00:07:49,260 --> 00:07:50,428 Ow. 172 00:07:50,511 --> 00:07:51,429 That's enough. 173 00:07:51,512 --> 00:07:53,139 HOMER AND BART: Aw. 174 00:07:53,222 --> 00:07:55,266 {\an8}We're here to enjoy ourselves. 175 00:07:55,349 --> 00:07:57,435 {\an8}If you just turn your head slightly, 176 00:07:57,518 --> 00:07:59,979 {\an8}I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. 177 00:08:00,062 --> 00:08:01,647 {\an8}-No time. -Homer. 178 00:08:01,731 --> 00:08:05,401 {\an8}(Grofé's "Sunrise" from The Grand Canyon Suite playing) 179 00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:07,820 {\an8}HOMER: Wow. Wow. 180 00:08:07,904 --> 00:08:11,657 And they say we're running out of room for our garbage. 181 00:08:11,741 --> 00:08:13,034 (shudders) 182 00:08:13,117 --> 00:08:16,245 NED: ♪ Go tell it on the mountain ♪ 183 00:08:16,329 --> 00:08:19,749 {\an8}♪ Over the hills and everywhere ♪ 184 00:08:19,832 --> 00:08:22,668 {\an8}♪ Go tell it on the mountain ♪ 185 00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:26,714 ♪ That Jesus Christ is born ♪ 186 00:08:26,797 --> 00:08:29,008 ♪ Born, born, born, born ♪ 187 00:08:29,091 --> 00:08:31,928 ♪ Go tell it on the mountain ♪ 188 00:08:32,011 --> 00:08:33,179 Octopus. Octopus. 189 00:08:33,262 --> 00:08:34,514 Oct-ar-pus. 190 00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:36,224 A vacation with Flanders? 191 00:08:36,307 --> 00:08:39,268 That's like telling you a bedtime story without a beer. 192 00:08:44,315 --> 00:08:46,108 (sighs) Now, where were we? 193 00:08:51,030 --> 00:08:53,115 -Thank you, ma'am. -Eh. 194 00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:55,660 -Thank you. -Eh. 195 00:08:57,912 --> 00:09:00,248 Mm-hmm. 196 00:09:00,331 --> 00:09:01,916 Am I such a terrible mother 197 00:09:01,999 --> 00:09:03,584 that my son doesn't even know 198 00:09:03,668 --> 00:09:05,545 to say thank you to a waitress? 199 00:09:05,628 --> 00:09:08,047 Come on, honey. What do you say? 200 00:09:08,130 --> 00:09:10,633 You want me to lie and say I'm thankful for chicken and veg 201 00:09:10,716 --> 00:09:13,135 when I wanted whiskey-battered bourbon bangers? 202 00:09:13,219 --> 00:09:15,721 Just say thank you. 203 00:09:15,805 --> 00:09:17,306 My boy never said thank you. 204 00:09:17,390 --> 00:09:18,891 Now he's on death row. 205 00:09:18,975 --> 00:09:20,518 (electricity crackles) 206 00:09:20,601 --> 00:09:22,186 Was on death row. 207 00:09:23,312 --> 00:09:26,649 (faint snoring) 208 00:09:26,732 --> 00:09:28,401 (snoring) 209 00:09:31,028 --> 00:09:34,240 Daddy, when will the noise stop? 210 00:09:34,323 --> 00:09:36,409 Hmm. Take these. 211 00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:40,371 Ugh. Those were earplugs. 212 00:09:40,454 --> 00:09:42,164 (boys groan) 213 00:09:45,251 --> 00:09:47,587 ♪ ♪ 214 00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:54,093 Wow, I never thought there'd be something I'd want to stare at longer 215 00:09:54,176 --> 00:09:56,345 than that car wreck on the way here. 216 00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:59,223 We've got to hurry before they run out of mules. 217 00:09:59,307 --> 00:10:01,350 Ooh. Is that what they're serving for breakfast? 218 00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:02,852 (Marge groans) 219 00:10:02,935 --> 00:10:04,061 HOMER: How about donkeys? 220 00:10:04,145 --> 00:10:05,313 MARGE: No. 221 00:10:09,275 --> 00:10:11,027 Huh? That's odd. 222 00:10:11,110 --> 00:10:13,779 Enjoying your moon view, Homer? 223 00:10:13,863 --> 00:10:14,947 Why you little... 224 00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:16,407 Two can play at that game. 225 00:10:16,490 --> 00:10:18,117 (squeaking) 226 00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:20,578 (groaning) 227 00:10:22,788 --> 00:10:24,540 -(Bart laughing) -Stupid kid. 228 00:10:24,624 --> 00:10:27,043 So embarrassing. 229 00:10:27,126 --> 00:10:28,753 I'm a little nervous 230 00:10:28,836 --> 00:10:31,047 with all these waivers we have to sign. 231 00:10:31,130 --> 00:10:33,132 Marge, this is a national park. 232 00:10:33,215 --> 00:10:36,052 People are completely safe here. 233 00:10:43,559 --> 00:10:44,935 Now let's do my favorite thing: 234 00:10:45,019 --> 00:10:46,771 go downhill. 235 00:10:46,854 --> 00:10:48,898 Whoa. You're 180? 236 00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:50,816 My blood pressure is. 237 00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:53,486 Okay. Uh, let's get you a mule, dude. 238 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:55,279 Oh... 239 00:10:55,363 --> 00:10:57,239 (loud braying) 240 00:10:59,158 --> 00:11:00,493 Get me El Gordo. 241 00:11:00,576 --> 00:11:02,453 Gordo here used to carry 242 00:11:02,536 --> 00:11:04,413 200-pound granite blocks 243 00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:05,790 up from the canyon. 244 00:11:06,707 --> 00:11:10,044 (Gordo groaning) 245 00:11:10,127 --> 00:11:12,213 (Grofé's "On the Trail" from The Grand Canyon Suite playing) 246 00:11:16,133 --> 00:11:18,552 This has got to be the most beautiful thing 247 00:11:18,636 --> 00:11:21,138 we've ever stole from the Indians. 248 00:11:21,222 --> 00:11:23,432 (engines roaring) 249 00:11:25,476 --> 00:11:26,602 What is that? 250 00:11:26,686 --> 00:11:28,062 A billionaires' retreat. 251 00:11:28,145 --> 00:11:29,355 Yeah, the heads of America's 252 00:11:29,438 --> 00:11:31,148 most powerful media companies 253 00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:32,817 have come to enjoy nature. 254 00:11:34,068 --> 00:11:37,029 DRIVER: Put up the cell phone tower. 255 00:11:37,113 --> 00:11:38,989 MAN: I said I wanted a Tom Cruise type, 256 00:11:39,073 --> 00:11:40,408 not Tom Cruise. 257 00:11:40,491 --> 00:11:42,785 DRIVER: Burn down the cell phone tower. 258 00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:47,081 I can't stand rich people. 259 00:11:49,750 --> 00:11:50,793 Can I name my mule? 260 00:11:50,876 --> 00:11:52,044 We prefer you don't. 261 00:11:52,128 --> 00:11:53,212 Is there a name for this trail? 262 00:11:53,295 --> 00:11:54,338 I'm sure there is. 263 00:11:54,422 --> 00:11:55,506 Is this a fun job? 264 00:11:55,589 --> 00:11:56,674 Not at the moment. 265 00:11:56,757 --> 00:11:57,883 Do you count as a grownup? 266 00:11:57,967 --> 00:11:59,093 My parents don't think so. 267 00:11:59,176 --> 00:12:00,302 You're a grownup to me. 268 00:12:00,386 --> 00:12:01,470 Thanks. 269 00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:03,055 Here, have a piece of the canyon. 270 00:12:03,139 --> 00:12:04,557 Are you sure it's okay? 271 00:12:04,640 --> 00:12:06,767 Hey, it only makes the canyon grander. 272 00:12:07,810 --> 00:12:09,812 BOTH: Aah! Aah! 273 00:12:09,895 --> 00:12:11,021 Aah! 274 00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:12,940 I don't know where your son gets it, Marge. 275 00:12:13,023 --> 00:12:14,483 I'm only going to say this once, 276 00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:16,527 but I think you're a little checked out. 277 00:12:16,610 --> 00:12:17,862 (echoing) Checked out. Checked out. 278 00:12:17,945 --> 00:12:20,197 Checked out. Checked out. Checked out. 279 00:12:20,281 --> 00:12:21,532 Checked out. Checked out. 280 00:12:21,615 --> 00:12:23,200 Checked out. 281 00:12:23,284 --> 00:12:25,911 Well, your kids aren't exactly perfect. 282 00:12:25,995 --> 00:12:27,663 Yay! We can improve. 283 00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:30,458 Let's think about it quietly. 284 00:12:31,459 --> 00:12:33,127 (groans) 285 00:12:33,210 --> 00:12:35,129 (sniffing) 286 00:12:35,212 --> 00:12:37,798 Boy, I bet that mustache smells really bad, huh? 287 00:12:37,882 --> 00:12:39,216 Oh, don't you rip on my lip strip. 288 00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:40,760 (sniffs) 289 00:12:40,843 --> 00:12:43,345 I smell candles and-and pew polish. 290 00:12:43,429 --> 00:12:44,930 We're near a church. 291 00:12:45,014 --> 00:12:47,349 (sniffs) Catholic, if I don't miss my guess. 292 00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:49,810 (organ playing) 293 00:12:53,105 --> 00:12:54,565 Hmm. 294 00:12:54,648 --> 00:12:55,900 A little Popeish for my taste, 295 00:12:55,983 --> 00:12:57,818 but I did come here for adventure. 296 00:12:57,902 --> 00:13:00,070 Geez, Flanders, you find God in everything. 297 00:13:00,154 --> 00:13:01,447 God is in everything. 298 00:13:01,530 --> 00:13:03,115 He's omnipresent. 299 00:13:03,199 --> 00:13:05,159 You mean, if I check into the Omni Hotel right now, 300 00:13:05,242 --> 00:13:06,368 he's there? 301 00:13:06,452 --> 00:13:08,120 As a matter of fact, he is. 302 00:13:08,204 --> 00:13:11,040 Then, from now on, we're staying at the Hyatt Regency. 303 00:13:11,123 --> 00:13:12,333 You're banned there, Dad. 304 00:13:12,416 --> 00:13:14,543 Not as Hagwar Swanson. 305 00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:17,463 {\an8}(with Scandinavian accent) I love this country. 306 00:13:19,048 --> 00:13:20,299 (shudders) 307 00:13:20,382 --> 00:13:22,468 Are you sure this is safe? 308 00:13:22,551 --> 00:13:25,095 Totally. You're with State Farm, right? 309 00:13:26,597 --> 00:13:27,723 Where's our guide? 310 00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:29,141 Where's the trail? 311 00:13:30,142 --> 00:13:32,186 (squawking) 312 00:13:32,269 --> 00:13:34,730 (humming) 313 00:13:36,357 --> 00:13:38,984 Aw. 314 00:13:39,068 --> 00:13:40,778 (shrieks) Big Maggie. 315 00:13:40,861 --> 00:13:42,071 I'd like to hear the rest. 316 00:13:42,154 --> 00:13:44,073 I still have my piece of the canyon. 317 00:13:45,908 --> 00:13:46,867 Ugh. 318 00:13:46,951 --> 00:13:48,035 (growls) 319 00:13:48,118 --> 00:13:50,538 Okay. It was looking rough... 320 00:13:52,623 --> 00:13:54,291 Oh, no bars. 321 00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:55,709 You mean, on your phone? 322 00:13:55,793 --> 00:13:56,961 Hey, you're right. 323 00:13:57,044 --> 00:13:58,754 Oh, more bad news. 324 00:13:58,838 --> 00:14:02,174 Oh, most of the food was on the guide's mule. 325 00:14:02,258 --> 00:14:03,801 I sure am glad somebody 326 00:14:03,884 --> 00:14:06,887 packed all this whitefish salad. 327 00:14:06,971 --> 00:14:08,180 I'm willing to eat some. 328 00:14:08,264 --> 00:14:10,516 And if I die, you know it's bad. 329 00:14:10,599 --> 00:14:13,853 Homer, it's time for you and me to go out and get help. 330 00:14:13,936 --> 00:14:16,146 Please be careful, Uncle Ned. 331 00:14:16,230 --> 00:14:17,356 I will, Bart. 332 00:14:17,439 --> 00:14:18,691 Please, please be careful. 333 00:14:18,774 --> 00:14:20,276 Don't worry. 334 00:14:20,359 --> 00:14:22,695 If you don't come back, I'll be so sad. 335 00:14:22,778 --> 00:14:24,488 Excuse me? What about over here? 336 00:14:24,572 --> 00:14:25,823 Right. 337 00:14:27,616 --> 00:14:30,536 (grunts) Please, please be careful. 338 00:14:30,619 --> 00:14:31,871 (braying) 339 00:14:31,954 --> 00:14:33,247 Please. 340 00:14:33,330 --> 00:14:34,874 Let's go, Flanders. 341 00:14:41,046 --> 00:14:42,798 (groans) 342 00:14:42,882 --> 00:14:44,550 (whining) 343 00:14:44,633 --> 00:14:46,760 Oh, no. The poor thing gets night terrors. 344 00:14:46,844 --> 00:14:50,055 I forgot to say, "God bless the mailman." 345 00:14:50,139 --> 00:14:51,807 He's not awake, but he's not asleep. 346 00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:53,517 Do your kids get these? 347 00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:55,561 I will now that I know what they are. 348 00:14:55,644 --> 00:14:57,730 Other kids say I'm in their nightmares. 349 00:14:57,813 --> 00:15:00,316 I'm not your puppet, Bart. I'm not. 350 00:15:00,399 --> 00:15:03,611 (grunting) 351 00:15:05,362 --> 00:15:07,323 You ever seen stars this bright, Homer? 352 00:15:07,406 --> 00:15:09,533 Blessed is the beauty of our Lord. 353 00:15:09,617 --> 00:15:11,619 ♪ ♪ 354 00:15:16,624 --> 00:15:19,293 (sighs) 355 00:15:19,376 --> 00:15:23,881 (gunshots) 356 00:15:23,964 --> 00:15:25,215 (clicking) 357 00:15:27,635 --> 00:15:30,095 Amen. Listen, Flanders. 358 00:15:30,179 --> 00:15:31,972 This trip has given me time to think. 359 00:15:32,056 --> 00:15:33,515 If I die here, 360 00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:36,060 you're welcome to live in my carcass for warmth. 361 00:15:36,143 --> 00:15:37,311 I'm not living in your carcass. 362 00:15:37,394 --> 00:15:38,562 Oh, come on. 363 00:15:38,646 --> 00:15:40,606 You make it sound like a bad thing. 364 00:15:40,689 --> 00:15:41,982 Look, we're saved! 365 00:15:42,066 --> 00:15:43,901 We just go down there, get some food and help 366 00:15:43,984 --> 00:15:45,903 returning to civilization. 367 00:15:45,986 --> 00:15:48,030 GUARD (over megaphone): Attention, people talking. 368 00:15:48,113 --> 00:15:50,532 Unless you are here to dispose of our poop, 369 00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:53,827 we will start shooting in five minutes. 370 00:15:56,789 --> 00:15:58,499 (dance music playing) 371 00:15:58,582 --> 00:16:01,752 (animals screeching) 372 00:16:03,921 --> 00:16:06,215 How is that even camping? 373 00:16:06,298 --> 00:16:07,633 'Tis easier for a camel 374 00:16:07,716 --> 00:16:09,802 to pass through the eye of a needle 375 00:16:09,885 --> 00:16:12,221 than a rich man to get into heaven. 376 00:16:12,304 --> 00:16:14,014 (sighs) Sometimes I just don't get it. 377 00:16:14,098 --> 00:16:16,100 What I'm saying is, the eye of the needle 378 00:16:16,183 --> 00:16:17,935 is very small, and a camel... 379 00:16:18,018 --> 00:16:19,269 No. I mean down there. 380 00:16:19,353 --> 00:16:20,854 They have everything we need to survive, 381 00:16:20,938 --> 00:16:22,147 but they won't share. 382 00:16:22,231 --> 00:16:24,274 Maybe if I look through these binoculars one more time, 383 00:16:24,358 --> 00:16:25,985 I'll-I'll see something better. 384 00:16:29,238 --> 00:16:30,572 (gasps) 385 00:16:30,656 --> 00:16:32,992 We've got to go in and steal what we need. 386 00:16:33,075 --> 00:16:34,994 Well, thou shalt not steal. 387 00:16:35,077 --> 00:16:36,537 But if I don't steal, that's coveting. 388 00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:37,871 That's bad, too. 389 00:16:37,955 --> 00:16:39,873 Look, Flanders, we tried things your way, 390 00:16:39,957 --> 00:16:41,166 and it failed. 391 00:16:41,250 --> 00:16:42,459 Now let's try mine. 392 00:16:42,543 --> 00:16:43,752 Okay. 393 00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:45,212 W-Wait! 394 00:16:45,295 --> 00:16:46,964 We never did things my way. 395 00:16:47,047 --> 00:16:49,341 Too late. (voice fading) I'm already rolling downhill. 396 00:16:50,926 --> 00:16:52,344 Ow, sharp rock. 397 00:16:52,428 --> 00:16:53,929 Ooh, cactus! 398 00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:55,305 (screams) More scorpions. 399 00:16:55,389 --> 00:16:57,266 Is that all you can do? Sting? 400 00:16:57,349 --> 00:16:59,309 (yells) Now they're pinching. 401 00:17:00,936 --> 00:17:03,772 (whispering) Easy, Flanders, don't make a sound. 402 00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:05,024 -Okay, here. -(Ned grunting) 403 00:17:05,107 --> 00:17:06,108 Come on, take this. 404 00:17:06,191 --> 00:17:07,568 (both grunting) 405 00:17:07,651 --> 00:17:08,861 Oh, I got it. 406 00:17:08,944 --> 00:17:10,279 Oh, it's heavy. 407 00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:12,740 (brays) 408 00:17:12,823 --> 00:17:14,533 (whispers) Ready to go. 409 00:17:14,616 --> 00:17:16,285 (gunshots) 410 00:17:16,368 --> 00:17:18,037 Uh, we're too heavy. 411 00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:19,538 Toss off what we don't need. 412 00:17:19,621 --> 00:17:21,540 (grunting) 413 00:17:21,623 --> 00:17:22,791 (gunshot) 414 00:17:22,875 --> 00:17:26,128 Fine. We can do without salad forks. 415 00:17:26,211 --> 00:17:27,212 Whoo-hoo! 416 00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:33,010 ♪ No sugar tonight for the coffee ♪ 417 00:17:33,093 --> 00:17:35,387 ♪ No sugar tonight for their tea ♪ 418 00:17:35,471 --> 00:17:38,265 ♪ We took all their fancy cheeses ♪ 419 00:17:38,348 --> 00:17:40,559 ♪ And their tasty charcuterie ♪ 420 00:17:40,642 --> 00:17:42,644 (growls) 421 00:17:43,937 --> 00:17:46,106 Trout solo! 422 00:17:46,190 --> 00:17:48,400 ♪ Ba-da-ta-da-da-da-da-da-da ♪ 423 00:17:48,484 --> 00:17:51,028 ♪ Ba-da-ta-da-da-da ♪ 424 00:17:51,111 --> 00:17:53,447 ♪ Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da ♪ 425 00:17:53,530 --> 00:17:55,949 ♪ Da-da-da-da da-da-da ♪ 426 00:17:56,033 --> 00:17:58,577 (together) ♪ Ba-da-da-da-da-da-da-da ♪ 427 00:17:58,660 --> 00:18:01,371 -♪ Ba-da-da-da-da-da ♪ -♪ Ba-da-dee-doo-da-da ♪ 428 00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:04,374 Grand Canyon! Yeah! 429 00:18:05,709 --> 00:18:07,002 (air whooshing) 430 00:18:13,967 --> 00:18:16,386 You know, Homer, we make a good team. 431 00:18:16,470 --> 00:18:17,513 Homer? 432 00:18:24,686 --> 00:18:26,438 HOMER: Breakfast time. 433 00:18:26,522 --> 00:18:28,440 Come and get it! 434 00:18:28,524 --> 00:18:30,442 (echoing) Come and get it! 435 00:18:30,526 --> 00:18:31,944 Come and... 436 00:18:32,027 --> 00:18:34,363 Ugh. Not again. 437 00:18:34,446 --> 00:18:36,198 Tablecloths. 438 00:18:36,281 --> 00:18:37,491 Caviar. 439 00:18:37,574 --> 00:18:38,659 Bacon! 440 00:18:38,742 --> 00:18:39,868 (munching) 441 00:18:39,952 --> 00:18:41,870 Bacon. 442 00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:46,375 No, this was before Lisa was a vegetarian. 443 00:18:46,458 --> 00:18:50,420 That's right. I had the arteries of a 20-year-old. 444 00:18:53,674 --> 00:18:55,676 I'm gonna miss you, pal. 445 00:18:58,512 --> 00:19:00,681 (neighs) 446 00:19:07,437 --> 00:19:08,730 (chuckles) 447 00:19:08,814 --> 00:19:10,023 Well, Homer, 448 00:19:10,107 --> 00:19:11,441 you think this will be one of those vacations 449 00:19:11,525 --> 00:19:13,402 where the friendship we made will last forever, 450 00:19:13,485 --> 00:19:15,863 or start eroding the minute we enter our cars? 451 00:19:15,946 --> 00:19:19,032 Flanders, like all friendships between men, 452 00:19:19,116 --> 00:19:22,202 in the end, it's up to our wives. 453 00:19:22,286 --> 00:19:23,537 Mm-hmm. 454 00:19:32,629 --> 00:19:34,631 NED: That was a nice story, Homer. 455 00:19:34,715 --> 00:19:36,425 You know, sometimes I wish this 456 00:19:36,508 --> 00:19:38,177 (chuckles) grand canyon between us, 457 00:19:38,260 --> 00:19:39,720 uh, wasn't so large. 458 00:19:39,803 --> 00:19:40,804 The offer still stands. 459 00:19:40,888 --> 00:19:42,181 You can live in my carcass. 460 00:19:42,264 --> 00:19:44,141 There's room in my legs for the boys. 461 00:19:44,224 --> 00:19:46,185 Maybe we could just store old clothes in you. 462 00:19:46,268 --> 00:19:47,477 I'd like that. 463 00:19:47,561 --> 00:19:49,855 And you know what, Flanders? 464 00:19:49,938 --> 00:19:52,065 I think we owe you guys a trip. 465 00:19:52,149 --> 00:19:54,109 ♪ ♪ 466 00:20:01,241 --> 00:20:03,160 Always wanted to visit the postcard museum. 467 00:20:03,243 --> 00:20:04,411 Thank you. 468 00:20:04,494 --> 00:20:06,121 My pleasure. 469 00:20:06,205 --> 00:20:08,373 I wonder if they sell postcards in the gift shop. 470 00:20:08,457 --> 00:20:09,958 We don't. 471 00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:12,711 {\an8}(Grofé's Grand Canyon Suite playing) 472 00:20:55,420 --> 00:20:57,256 Shh! 473 00:21:01,301 --> 00:21:03,262 Subtitled by B. Everdene