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CHOIR: ♪ The Simpsons ♪
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{\an8}HOMER: Oh-hoo-hoo!
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{\an8}Pork chops with gravy!
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{\an8}Wait... but today's not
Pork Chop Tuesday.
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{\an8}Or Gravy Thursday!
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{\an8}I also set up some mirrors
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{\an8}so you could watch
hockey fights while you eat.
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HOMER: Whoo-hoo!
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{\an8}Oh, I love Canadian-on-Canadian violence.
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{\an8}Oh, baby, this is so great!
Thank you so much.
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{\an8}I'm just happy you're happy.
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{\an8}Wait a minute, that's not something
people really feel.
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{\an8}What's going on?
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{\an8}Well, I do have a favor.
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{\an8}Patty and Selma came home early
from their vacation,
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{\an8}but the cleaners still haven't
gotten all the black mold
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{\an8}out of their apartment.
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{\an8}(deep roar)
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{\an8}So they need a place to stay. Here.
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{\an8}-(shrieks)
-Paris was a bust.
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{\an8}They wouldn't even let us
see the Mona Lisa.
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{\an8}They kept yelling, "La Joconde!
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{\an8}Her smile will die!"
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{\an8}No, Marge, no!
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{\an8}You can't invite a couple of Riddlers
to stay in the Bat Cave!
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{\an8}You ate the food
and looked in the mirrors.
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{\an8}They're staying!
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{\an8}(gruff chuckling)
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{\an8}(inhaling, exhaling loudly)
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{\an8}(Bart and Lisa coughing)
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{\an8}Hmm.
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{\an8}Oh, honey,
one teensy problem with this plan.
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{\an8}I'm a teensy bit concerned
about them smoking around the children.
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{\an8}You know, their lungs are so teensy.
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{\an8}Mwah! Mwah!
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Hmm. He has a point.
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No, no.
No, no, we don't have to smoke.
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We can stop whenever we want.
See?
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(both grunt)
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Okay, how about this--
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if you catch us smoking in the house,
even one time,
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you can throw us out on the street.
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You know what?
I trust them not to smoke.
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And if you trust them,
I trust them, too.
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(devious chuckle)
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Safety first!
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Screw this.
We'll just go outside.
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Nature is God's ashtray.
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(hums)
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(thunder crashes)
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Bad news, bears.
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Forecast calls for nothing but rain.
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(both groan)
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(grunting)
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(glass shatters)
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(humming)
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(sighs)
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Here we go.
Problem solved.
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Electric cigarettes.
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(loud inhaling)
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Choke on our harmless fumes.
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Hmm?
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Well, if you fall asleep with them,
will you even burn to death?
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-BOTH: Uh-uh.
-Oh.
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(loud, rapid inhaling and exhaling)
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They call these cigarettes?
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They don't stain my fingers,
my hair smells like hair,
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and what do I stub out
in my scrambled eggs?
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Sure, it's got the nicotine,
but where's the tar?
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Where's the stab from every breath
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that reminds me I'm alive?
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No smoke detector! Let's roll!
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(both grunt)
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Wait, wait.
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Turn on the faucet
so no one'll get suspicious.
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(explosion)
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(smoke detectors beeping)
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Aha! I gotcha!
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-(beeping stops)
-You can't resist smoking in the house
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any more than I can resist
drinking in the car.
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-What happened?
-I don't know.
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The water caught on fire.
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(gasps)
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And now I banish you from paradise.
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I'm glad I never bothered to learn
which one of you is which.
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Please, show some compassion
for two good people
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who just can't stop smoking.
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Hmm... hmm.
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I know just the place.
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-(tires screech)
-(coughing)
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(both sniffing)
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Oh! (shudders)
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Tobacco!
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(both chuckling excitedly)
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(loud inhaling, exhaling)
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Who needs Paris?
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This is our City of Lights!
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♪ ♪
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Flaming tap water.
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I saw something about that
in a documentary.
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Sad. Sad.
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Sad. Sad. Sad. Sad.
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Sad. Sad. Sad.
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Cute. (gasps) This one!
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{\an8}MALE NARRATOR:
In this rural community,
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{\an8}hydraulic fracturing, or fracking,
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{\an8}was greeted as a windfall.
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(crowd cheering)
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By pumping high-pressure liquid
into underground shale deposits,
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fracking releases natural gas,
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but can lead to devastating
environmental consequences.
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(whooshes)
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Yep, used to be you could try
burning your water all day
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and nothing would happen.
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Henry, did you remember
to turn off the Slip 'N Slide?
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(children laughing)
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-(explosion)
-(screaming)
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Well, I... reckon not.
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I think someone is fracking
under our neighborhood.
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And I know who.
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It's you, Mr. Texan.
Oil wasn't enough--
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now you're going after
our natural gas.
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Aw, now,
ain't nothing natural about gas.
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If you can't dance in it,
I ain't drilling for it.
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I don't do this for the money,
it's the dancing.
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It's always been the dancing.
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(whooping and laughing)
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-(both sigh)
-All right!
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BART: Oh, man.
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He made us watch him dance
for three hours,
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and he really only has one move.
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If someone was fracking
in our neighborhood,
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wouldn't we know it?
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Maybe a satellite picture
will give us a clue.
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Hmm, this is clearly a fracking site.
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How are they keeping people away?
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(wind whistling)
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-Aw, it's a terrific sport--
-Shh!
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This whole building is just a facade
for a drilling operation.
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Indeed it is.
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Evergreen Terrace is built atop
a massive shale deposit.
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Think of it--
all that poor natural gas
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trapped underneath
your shanties and lean-tos.
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Smithers, give these two brats
what they deserve
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for sticking their noses
in my business.
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(both groan)
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(Lisa groans)
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Stopping Mr. Burns may be beyond
the power of an eight-year-old girl
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with a book report due on
Beezus and Ramona,
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but I know someone who can help--
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the first female
Speaker of the State Assembly,
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a politician
who would never ignore
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a fellow environmentalist in need,
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my hero, Maxine Lombard.
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(gasps)
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Charge the electric limo--
we're going to Springfield.
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What about your cool-down period?
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What about it?!
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Lisa! Motorcade!
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Assemblywoman Lombard!
You got my e-mails!
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I'll go anywhere, anytime,
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to defend our precious Bay Area values.
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(gasps) Terrible!
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Just shocking.
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Does anybody have a baby
we can hold near the flames?
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I guess I do.
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(sighs)
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I'm gonna hit this Mr. Burns
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with a politician's
most powerful weapon--
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an invitation to a committee hearing.
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{\an8}Mr. Burns, do you admit
that you illegally pump
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{\an8}toxic chemicals into the groundwater
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{\an8}below Evergreen Terrace?
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(indistinct whispering)
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I... don't recall.
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Mr. Burns!
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Have you no regard
for the life and health
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of your fellow human beings?
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(indistinct whispering)
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I... don't recall.
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You can't drill underneath people's homes
without their permission.
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As chairwoman
of this Committee on Energy,
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Natural Resources,
and Blimp Safety,
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your fracking operation
is hereby shut down.
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(groans)
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I demand to see that
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capitalism-castrating suffragette
this instant!
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You haven't bested me.
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I will find a way to shatter that shale.
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What makes men like you
think you can do
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whatever you want to our planet?
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Maybe the planet wants a strong man
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to take her by the hand and lead her.
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You don't know
what the planet wants.
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Oh, and I suppose you do?
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The planet wants to be
protected and nourished
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and maybe even...
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Kissed.
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(both moan)
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Mwah!
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♪ ♪
202
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Wait a minute,
I'm not having a stroke, am I?
203
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No. Am I?
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-I don't think so.
-Oh, good.
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♪ ♪
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(both gasp)
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00:09:07,338 --> 00:09:08,464
-You!
-Me?
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00:09:08,548 --> 00:09:10,132
(Burns shudders)
209
00:09:13,678 --> 00:09:16,347
This was all a mistake--
an impulsive...
210
00:09:16,430 --> 00:09:18,266
-Reckless...
-...knee-buckling...
211
00:09:18,349 --> 00:09:21,811
-...spat-snapping...
-...Spanx-shredding mistake.
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00:09:21,894 --> 00:09:25,398
-(sighs) Oh, it was great.
-(chuckles) Best I've ever had.
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00:09:25,481 --> 00:09:27,525
And that includes...
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00:09:27,608 --> 00:09:28,943
Nellie Taft.
215
00:09:29,026 --> 00:09:32,280
So, Monty, shall we find a way
to continue this...
216
00:09:32,363 --> 00:09:34,282
purely passionate affair?
217
00:09:34,365 --> 00:09:36,033
But you're a softhearted liberal!
218
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And you're a hard-hearted capitalist.
219
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Enemies by day, lovers by night.
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00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:42,873
MAXINE: Mmm... mwah!
221
00:09:42,957 --> 00:09:44,917
Now, get out of my office.
222
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As soon as I collect my things.
223
00:09:47,211 --> 00:09:49,755
Uh, derringer, sword cane,
224
00:09:49,839 --> 00:09:53,134
derringer cane, sword derringer--
all right, it's all here.
225
00:09:53,217 --> 00:09:55,344
If I want to resume fracking,
226
00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:56,887
I have to buy the mineral rights
227
00:09:56,971 --> 00:09:59,682
for every single parcel of land
in Evergreen Terrace.
228
00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:01,726
To win people over,
I'll need a salesman
229
00:10:01,809 --> 00:10:05,104
whose folksy facade
masks a deep gusher of greed.
230
00:10:07,189 --> 00:10:08,816
Hmm?
231
00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:13,654
(chuckles)
232
00:10:15,239 --> 00:10:16,866
Congratulations, Simpson!
233
00:10:16,949 --> 00:10:19,493
You're now my chief
energy innovation marketing officer.
234
00:10:19,577 --> 00:10:20,411
Whoo-hoo!
235
00:10:20,494 --> 00:10:24,165
All you've got to do is sell fracking
to your friends and neighbors.
236
00:10:24,248 --> 00:10:25,249
Whoo-hoo?
237
00:10:25,333 --> 00:10:28,169
I don't know, "fracking" is
one of those scary Lisa words.
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Bah! Fracking produces
enough clean natural gas
239
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:34,050
to make America independent
of sheiks, caliphs, and...
240
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Scandinavians.
241
00:10:35,676 --> 00:10:37,845
Not to mention,
it doesn't create any of that awful
242
00:10:37,928 --> 00:10:40,097
worker-mutating nuclear waste.
243
00:10:40,181 --> 00:10:41,932
Homer, game starts in an hour.
244
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-Don't forget to set your fantasy lineup.
-Thanks, Charlie.
245
00:10:44,977 --> 00:10:47,188
Maybe fracking isn't so bad.
246
00:10:47,271 --> 00:10:49,565
Then say yes to this raise,
this promotion,
247
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and this flannel shirt, which says--
248
00:10:51,567 --> 00:10:53,653
"I'm not screwing you over."
249
00:10:53,736 --> 00:10:55,529
I'm not screwing you over.
250
00:10:55,613 --> 00:10:58,532
No, uh,
I'm not screwing you over.
251
00:10:58,616 --> 00:11:00,868
I'm not screwing you over.
252
00:11:00,951 --> 00:11:03,454
(crying)
I'm so proud of you, Papa.
253
00:11:04,705 --> 00:11:06,957
Some folks will tell you
that fracking's no good,
254
00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:08,709
but what they don't tell you is,
255
00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:11,629
hydraulic fracturing creates jobs.
256
00:11:11,712 --> 00:11:13,547
And all those new workers
are gonna want
257
00:11:13,631 --> 00:11:17,218
to spend their earnings
buying what you're selling-- beer.
258
00:11:17,301 --> 00:11:18,969
Authentic Italian food.
259
00:11:19,053 --> 00:11:20,971
Useless left-handed crap.
260
00:11:21,055 --> 00:11:22,723
Magical nonsense.
261
00:11:22,807 --> 00:11:26,018
Expensive toys for grown-ups
they don't open or play with.
262
00:11:26,102 --> 00:11:27,812
Pornography and nachos.
263
00:11:27,895 --> 00:11:30,564
High-quality
Spanish-language programming.
264
00:11:30,648 --> 00:11:32,858
High-quality methamphetamines.
265
00:11:32,942 --> 00:11:36,237
Laundry, homework, pranks,
poop, poop, and poop.
266
00:11:36,320 --> 00:11:38,739
But our water was on fire.
267
00:11:38,823 --> 00:11:42,118
How could you sell fracking
for Mr. Burns?
268
00:11:42,201 --> 00:11:44,453
'Cause I've never gotten
a promotion before.
269
00:11:44,537 --> 00:11:46,163
Once I thought I had,
but it turned out
270
00:11:46,247 --> 00:11:48,374
to be a beautifully-worded firing,
271
00:11:48,457 --> 00:11:51,293
-so judge me all you want.
-I am judging you.
272
00:11:51,377 --> 00:11:53,379
-Good. Judge away.
-Judge, judge, judge.
273
00:11:53,462 --> 00:11:55,005
-Don't care. Don't care.
-Judge, judge, judge.
274
00:11:55,089 --> 00:11:56,549
-Judge, judge, judge.
-Don't care. Don't care.
275
00:11:56,632 --> 00:11:58,050
-Don't care. Don't care.
-Judge, judge...
276
00:11:58,134 --> 00:11:59,844
Pumping frack cash.
277
00:11:59,927 --> 00:12:02,388
It's a gas cash... blast?
278
00:12:02,471 --> 00:12:04,849
Residents of Evergreen Terrace
are undecided
279
00:12:04,932 --> 00:12:07,893
whether to sell
their mineral rights to Mr. Burns.
280
00:12:07,977 --> 00:12:10,187
Mr. Burns is a vampire,
281
00:12:10,271 --> 00:12:12,857
sucking the lifeblood of this town
282
00:12:12,940 --> 00:12:15,484
and lining his coffin with cash.
283
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:19,405
Oh, Maxine, no one insults me
in a sound bite the way you do.
284
00:12:19,488 --> 00:12:23,909
Oh, Monty,
you're such a sexy little Nosferatu.
285
00:12:23,993 --> 00:12:26,036
Same time tomorrow night?
(chuckles)
286
00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:27,580
I'll bring the oxygen.
287
00:12:27,663 --> 00:12:29,874
-(quietly) Better bring two tanks.
-Hmm?
288
00:12:29,957 --> 00:12:33,294
And so, we see a clear correlation
289
00:12:33,377 --> 00:12:35,671
between industrial hydro compounds
290
00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:39,216
and water table contamination
well outside the...
291
00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:41,802
margin of error.
292
00:12:43,971 --> 00:12:45,639
Mr. Simpson, rebuttal?
293
00:12:45,723 --> 00:12:46,766
(clears throat)
294
00:12:46,849 --> 00:12:48,726
Everyone who signs over
their mineral rights
295
00:12:48,809 --> 00:12:51,771
to Mr. Burns gets $5,000.
296
00:12:51,854 --> 00:12:53,481
5,000 smackers?!
297
00:12:53,564 --> 00:12:55,858
Money is like a job
you don't even have to do!
298
00:12:55,941 --> 00:12:57,693
-(dance music playing)
-(cheering)
299
00:12:59,945 --> 00:13:02,281
-Ay, dinero.
-Signing Stu.
300
00:13:02,364 --> 00:13:03,616
(laughter)
301
00:13:05,034 --> 00:13:06,952
Yeah!
302
00:13:07,036 --> 00:13:10,247
I think my arguments
were more cogent-- bo-hyvik.
303
00:13:10,331 --> 00:13:11,499
What?!
304
00:13:11,582 --> 00:13:13,876
Cogent-- bo-hyvik!
305
00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:15,085
(bird caws)
306
00:13:16,086 --> 00:13:17,463
Mr. Burns, we did it!
307
00:13:17,546 --> 00:13:21,008
Everyone in the neighborhood
sold us their gas rights!
308
00:13:21,091 --> 00:13:22,426
Hmm.
309
00:13:23,302 --> 00:13:25,846
Excellent.
310
00:13:25,930 --> 00:13:27,765
No, no. It's excellent. It's excellent.
311
00:13:27,848 --> 00:13:29,850
Uh, maybe you can help me, Simpson.
312
00:13:29,934 --> 00:13:31,769
You've had a relationship
or two in your life.
313
00:13:31,852 --> 00:13:34,355
(laughing) Well... one.
314
00:13:34,438 --> 00:13:37,733
I have embarked
on a "beneficial friendship"
315
00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:39,860
with a woman with whom
I have nothing in common.
316
00:13:39,944 --> 00:13:42,655
Her opinions are abhorrent to me,
but the passion.
317
00:13:42,738 --> 00:13:45,783
Well, look at these racy texts
she sends me.
318
00:13:45,866 --> 00:13:48,285
{\an8}(rhythmic clicking)
319
00:13:50,579 --> 00:13:52,122
Oh, baby.
320
00:13:52,206 --> 00:13:54,625
How long can I sustain
this high-wire act
321
00:13:54,708 --> 00:13:56,961
of loathing and lust?
322
00:13:57,044 --> 00:13:59,797
Well, I'm no Carl
when it comes to this stuff,
323
00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:01,590
but I ain't no Lenny, neither.
324
00:14:01,674 --> 00:14:03,133
And I would say...
325
00:14:03,217 --> 00:14:06,387
no matter how much you try
to keep things casual,
326
00:14:06,470 --> 00:14:08,639
someone always gets hurt.
327
00:14:08,722 --> 00:14:11,517
Hmm.
Well, then I must harden my heart
328
00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:13,477
against such an outcome.
329
00:14:15,813 --> 00:14:17,481
I appreciate the counsel, Simpson.
330
00:14:17,565 --> 00:14:20,442
Now, please trap-door yourself out.
331
00:14:20,526 --> 00:14:22,319
Glad I could be of help!
332
00:14:22,403 --> 00:14:23,654
(indistinct chatter)
333
00:14:25,322 --> 00:14:28,576
Do you have the signed gas leases?
334
00:14:30,661 --> 00:14:33,247
Hold on. This feels light.
335
00:14:33,330 --> 00:14:34,999
Ah.
336
00:14:35,082 --> 00:14:36,917
One of these deeds
is missing a signature.
337
00:14:37,001 --> 00:14:40,129
The gas rights transfer form
for 742 Evergreen Terrace
338
00:14:40,212 --> 00:14:43,674
was never signed by...
Marge Simpson.
339
00:14:43,757 --> 00:14:46,385
(gasps)
Marge, why didn't you sign?
340
00:14:46,468 --> 00:14:49,263
Our water was on fire!
341
00:14:49,346 --> 00:14:51,307
I'm sorry, but the law states
342
00:14:51,390 --> 00:14:54,560
that unless every single resident
sells their rights,
343
00:14:54,643 --> 00:14:57,271
Burns can't frack drop one!
344
00:14:57,354 --> 00:14:59,356
ALL: Oh!
345
00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:02,067
Oh, I was counting on that money
to pay for my other calf implant.
346
00:15:02,151 --> 00:15:03,360
MOE: Yuck.
347
00:15:03,444 --> 00:15:06,030
I already felt the pride
of energy independence.
348
00:15:06,113 --> 00:15:08,282
(overlapping crowd chatter)
349
00:15:08,365 --> 00:15:11,160
Marge Simpson,
I'm as mad at you
350
00:15:11,243 --> 00:15:13,537
as you usually are at me!
351
00:15:13,621 --> 00:15:15,456
-(gasps)
-Hmm!
352
00:15:15,539 --> 00:15:17,875
(indistinct chatter)
353
00:15:17,958 --> 00:15:20,419
(wind whistling)
354
00:15:20,502 --> 00:15:22,212
Cheer up, Monty.
355
00:15:22,296 --> 00:15:24,089
All you lost was money,
356
00:15:24,173 --> 00:15:26,675
but what you get is... me.
357
00:15:29,136 --> 00:15:31,764
{\an8}(cracking)
358
00:15:31,847 --> 00:15:34,266
All I lost was money?
359
00:15:34,350 --> 00:15:36,936
Let me make one thing
perfectly clear.
360
00:15:37,019 --> 00:15:38,771
Our dalliance meant nothing to me!
361
00:15:38,854 --> 00:15:41,774
You were but a sprig of parsley
garnishing my beefsteak.
362
00:15:41,857 --> 00:15:45,361
Now I cast you aside
for the busboys to gnaw upon.
363
00:15:45,444 --> 00:15:48,197
Considered this ill-conceived
affair terminated!
364
00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:49,573
(gasps)
365
00:15:52,117 --> 00:15:55,412
(chuckles)
I played this just perfectly.
366
00:15:58,499 --> 00:16:00,084
HOMER: Oh, yeah, great.
367
00:16:00,167 --> 00:16:02,503
Great, Marge, great work.
368
00:16:02,586 --> 00:16:06,632
Thanks to you, Springfield will never
be a natural gas boomtown,
369
00:16:06,715 --> 00:16:09,885
and like all boomtowns,
it would have lasted forever.
370
00:16:09,969 --> 00:16:13,430
Oh... our water was on fire.
371
00:16:13,514 --> 00:16:17,017
Oh! Was on fire. Was!
372
00:16:17,101 --> 00:16:19,144
I finally got a job I was good at,
373
00:16:19,228 --> 00:16:21,021
and now I have to give it up!
374
00:16:21,105 --> 00:16:22,523
(grunts)
375
00:16:22,606 --> 00:16:25,651
So, you've come begging
not to be fired?
376
00:16:25,734 --> 00:16:27,695
Smithers,
turn my back on this man!
377
00:16:27,778 --> 00:16:30,114
Maximum huff!
378
00:16:30,197 --> 00:16:32,866
Wait, Mr. Burns.
I'm here to man up.
379
00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:35,369
It was all my wife's fault!
(sighs heavily)
380
00:16:35,452 --> 00:16:38,205
Sometimes I think she and I
have nothing in common!
381
00:16:38,288 --> 00:16:41,041
Nothing in common, eh?
Tell me more.
382
00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:42,501
Marge likes sushi.
383
00:16:42,584 --> 00:16:44,628
I like gum that squirts in your mouth.
384
00:16:44,712 --> 00:16:46,296
She's into romantic comedies.
385
00:16:46,380 --> 00:16:50,134
I like movies where there's only
one day a year when murder is legal.
386
00:16:50,217 --> 00:16:53,387
Yup, Marge and I see the world
in totally different ways.
387
00:16:53,470 --> 00:16:55,222
Hmm. Different, exactly.
388
00:16:55,305 --> 00:16:58,308
That's why I had to give my woman
the old heave-ho.
389
00:16:58,392 --> 00:17:00,728
So, you don't miss
that politics lady at all?
390
00:17:00,811 --> 00:17:02,688
Not for one Chinese second.
391
00:17:02,771 --> 00:17:04,606
And I'm sure
she's forgotten all about me.
392
00:17:05,983 --> 00:17:07,818
(both gasp)
393
00:17:07,901 --> 00:17:09,403
HOMER: Killdozers.
394
00:17:09,486 --> 00:17:10,946
Whatever are you doing, man?!
395
00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:14,408
We're tearing down this place
and putting up a recycling center,
396
00:17:14,491 --> 00:17:17,119
slash Native American history museum,
397
00:17:17,202 --> 00:17:19,038
slash condor sanctuary.
398
00:17:19,121 --> 00:17:20,497
(screeches)
399
00:17:20,581 --> 00:17:23,542
Hmm. A project this bloated
and ill thought out
400
00:17:23,625 --> 00:17:25,753
could only be the work
of an angry liberal.
401
00:17:25,836 --> 00:17:27,337
(gasps) Maxine!
402
00:17:27,421 --> 00:17:29,882
My ex is using the thing
I hate most against me--
403
00:17:29,965 --> 00:17:31,341
big government.
404
00:17:31,425 --> 00:17:32,760
(grunts)
405
00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:34,428
-(chatter)
-(camera shutters clicking)
406
00:17:34,511 --> 00:17:37,514
Stop this ribbon cutting!
This is private property!
407
00:17:37,598 --> 00:17:39,391
What's the matter, Mr. Burns?
408
00:17:39,475 --> 00:17:41,935
Never heard of eminent domain?
409
00:17:42,019 --> 00:17:44,438
You're just doing this
to get back at me for dumping you!
410
00:17:44,521 --> 00:17:46,607
That is ridiculous.
411
00:17:50,819 --> 00:17:53,906
(gasps)
The Antonin Scalia bedroom!
412
00:17:53,989 --> 00:17:57,618
It's a National Public Radio
broadcast center now.
413
00:17:57,701 --> 00:17:59,119
Who are you?
414
00:17:59,203 --> 00:18:02,164
I'm Robert Siegel,
and this is All Things Considered.
415
00:18:02,247 --> 00:18:04,291
(theme music playing)
416
00:18:10,380 --> 00:18:12,132
{\an8}-(groaning)
-Stop laying about, you!
417
00:18:12,216 --> 00:18:13,550
{\an8}There's work to be done!
418
00:18:13,634 --> 00:18:16,136
{\an8}(weakly) Or Gravy Thursday.
419
00:18:16,220 --> 00:18:18,180
If that woman thinks
she's been scorned now,
420
00:18:18,263 --> 00:18:20,474
she ain't seen nothing yet!
421
00:18:28,357 --> 00:18:29,691
(clacking)
422
00:18:29,775 --> 00:18:31,985
It's fracking time.
423
00:18:32,069 --> 00:18:33,821
(squeaking)
424
00:18:33,904 --> 00:18:36,073
(whooshing)
425
00:18:36,156 --> 00:18:38,200
(rumbling)
426
00:18:39,284 --> 00:18:41,370
(groaning)
427
00:18:41,453 --> 00:18:43,539
(Bart groaning)
428
00:18:43,622 --> 00:18:45,624
(grunts)
429
00:18:47,126 --> 00:18:48,293
(groans)
430
00:18:48,377 --> 00:18:52,464
Is one of the side effects
of fracking earthquakes?
431
00:18:52,548 --> 00:18:54,383
(voice shaking) Yes!
432
00:18:58,762 --> 00:19:01,640
What are you doing?
You're destroying this neighborhood.
433
00:19:01,723 --> 00:19:04,309
Just like you destroyed my mansion.
434
00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:06,353
I don't know what I ever saw in you,
435
00:19:06,436 --> 00:19:08,647
you planet-ruining monster!
436
00:19:08,730 --> 00:19:11,316
Likewise, you planet-saving succubus!
437
00:19:12,109 --> 00:19:14,194
(metallic rattling)
438
00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:18,282
Homer, turn off that horrible machine!
439
00:19:18,365 --> 00:19:20,909
You don't know anything
about hydraulic fracturing!
440
00:19:20,993 --> 00:19:23,912
You've just been brainwashed
by liberal TV shows
441
00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:26,498
who use fracking
as an easy bad guy,
442
00:19:26,582 --> 00:19:28,834
but it can save this country!
443
00:19:28,917 --> 00:19:31,587
Our... water... was...
444
00:19:31,670 --> 00:19:33,839
on... fire!
445
00:19:34,882 --> 00:19:37,217
Wait.
I finally get what you're saying.
446
00:19:37,301 --> 00:19:38,886
Fracking is great,
447
00:19:38,969 --> 00:19:41,471
but the only place it should ever happen
448
00:19:41,555 --> 00:19:44,099
is in other people's towns!
449
00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:45,601
Hmm.
450
00:19:45,684 --> 00:19:47,186
(grunting)
451
00:19:54,610 --> 00:19:56,653
(grunting nervously)
452
00:20:04,286 --> 00:20:07,789
You always do the right thing...
sort of.
453
00:20:09,291 --> 00:20:10,500
What is he doing?
454
00:20:10,584 --> 00:20:12,961
He was furious at that woman,
now he's embracing her.
455
00:20:13,045 --> 00:20:15,255
He told me himself
they had nothing in common.
456
00:20:15,339 --> 00:20:17,341
Nothing except passion.
457
00:20:17,424 --> 00:20:19,509
-Mm.
-(cracking)
458
00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:21,220
(hearts beating)
459
00:20:21,303 --> 00:20:23,263
I was a fool
to break up with you, Maxine.
460
00:20:23,347 --> 00:20:26,391
I'm sorry I turned your home
into a liberal paradise.
461
00:20:26,475 --> 00:20:29,228
You think we could make us work?
462
00:20:29,311 --> 00:20:31,730
I don't know.
We're pretty different.
463
00:20:31,813 --> 00:20:34,483
But we've got passion,
and as long as we've got that,
464
00:20:34,566 --> 00:20:37,444
our lives will never get boring.
465
00:20:37,527 --> 00:20:39,571
Mmm.
466
00:20:41,073 --> 00:20:43,742
Oh, there's free jazz on Saturdays
at the art museum.
467
00:20:44,660 --> 00:20:47,496
Now they say omega-3 pills
are bad for you.
468
00:20:48,538 --> 00:20:50,707
My sister's dog had puppies.
469
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:53,293
What kind?
470
00:20:53,377 --> 00:20:55,545
What kind of what?
471
00:20:55,629 --> 00:20:58,006
What kind of dog
does your sister have?
472
00:20:58,715 --> 00:21:00,342
I don't know.
473
00:21:14,273 --> 00:21:16,400
{\an8}What color drawer pulls
did you want?
474
00:21:16,483 --> 00:21:18,360
{\an8}Nickel or brushed nickel?
475
00:21:20,112 --> 00:21:22,948
{\an8}Oh, I wish we'd bought
the more expensive theater tickets.
476
00:21:23,031 --> 00:21:25,826
{\an8}I'll never see anything in row BB.
477
00:21:28,620 --> 00:21:31,707
{\an8}There's a sale on lawn furniture
at the Lawns Plus.
478
00:21:35,210 --> 00:21:37,421
{\an8}Why are all cars black or gray now?
479
00:21:37,504 --> 00:21:39,881
{\an8}It's like if you see a red one,
it's a big deal.
480
00:21:44,094 --> 00:21:46,471
{\an8}I'm thinking about
wearing a watch again.
481
00:21:52,144 --> 00:21:54,187
-(crowd murmuring)
-Shh!
482
00:21:57,065 --> 00:21:59,985
Subtitled by B. Everdene