1
00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:06,562
The Simpsons.

2
00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:10,050
I'm so glad we came
to Paradise Pier.

3
00:01:10,120 --> 00:01:11,724
Ever since
I was a little girl,

4
00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:14,127
I've wanted to ride
that Ferris wheel.

5
00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:19,520
They're tearing down
the pier!

6
00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:21,483
But what will junkies
do drugs under?

7
00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:25,082
They'll bounce back, son.
They're a strong people.

8
00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:40,689
Ooh, ooh! I want to ride
the bumper cars.

9
00:01:40,760 --> 00:01:43,161
Whoa, sir, we're dismantling this ride.
It's not safe.

10
00:01:43,240 --> 00:01:44,241
I call the red one.

11
00:01:51,480 --> 00:01:54,484
Homie, no!
It's not street legal!

12
00:01:54,560 --> 00:01:56,449
Don't worry, ma'am.
He's not connected

13
00:01:56,520 --> 00:01:59,285
to the power supply,
so he can't go far.

14
00:01:59,360 --> 00:02:01,283
Gulp.

15
00:02:01,360 --> 00:02:03,169
Whee!

16
00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:08,201
Whoa, whoa!

17
00:02:11,240 --> 00:02:13,481
Hey. Hey. Hey.

18
00:02:13,560 --> 00:02:15,608
Oh, he's got us
in a corner.

19
00:02:15,680 --> 00:02:17,409
I hate this ride.

20
00:02:26,360 --> 00:02:28,727
Mom, can we buy a
magnesium vapor soak tub?

21
00:02:28,800 --> 00:02:31,007
For the last time, no!

22
00:02:31,080 --> 00:02:33,970
But how will I increase
my vitality?

23
00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:44,685
Uh, he's just faking loss
of vitality, Reverend.

24
00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:47,127
Mmm-hmm. I believe you.

25
00:02:50,440 --> 00:02:52,727
A strong man?
Are you for sale?

26
00:02:52,800 --> 00:02:55,016
Because I need someone to throw
a birdbath at my neighbor.

27
00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:59,568
Robusto is not for sale. But would
you like to buy my last dumbbell?

28
00:02:59,880 --> 00:03:03,123
Hmm, I suppose I could
use a little toning.

29
00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:09,763
I'll give you $5 for it.

30
00:03:09,840 --> 00:03:11,126
Sold!

31
00:03:13,400 --> 00:03:15,323
A bicycle built for two!

32
00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:18,165
And I could be
one of those two.

33
00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:22,484
Homie, if I buy
a bicycle built for two,

34
00:03:22,560 --> 00:03:24,050
will you ride with me?

35
00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:26,566
Marge, I don't hate
your mother.

36
00:03:26,640 --> 00:03:29,007
I just won't be sad
when she dies.

37
00:03:29,080 --> 00:03:30,206
Forty-seven, forty-eight...

38
00:03:30,280 --> 00:03:32,362
I was asking for something.

39
00:03:32,480 --> 00:03:33,766
Yeah, sure.
Whatever you want.

40
00:03:33,840 --> 00:03:37,322
Ninety-five, 96, 13, 64,
banana...

41
00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:40,131
I'll take it.

42
00:03:40,640 --> 00:03:44,611
I can't believe
I own a tandem bike.

43
00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:51,841
You want me to ride
a what-cycle built for who?

44
00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:54,088
Our tandem bicycle.

45
00:03:54,160 --> 00:03:55,969
When I bought it,
you said you'd ride with me.

46
00:03:56,040 --> 00:04:01,922
But I'm watching television. A lot
of people worked hard on this show.

47
00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:05,084
I was really
looking forward lo it.

48
00:04:05,160 --> 00:04:09,085
Bart, how would you like to go on
a tandem bike ride with your mom?

49
00:04:09,160 --> 00:04:11,606
Mom, please!
I'm playing a video game.

50
00:04:11,680 --> 00:04:14,081
Mmm, small hill.
Pedal, pedal, pedal.

51
00:04:14,160 --> 00:04:17,084
Now enjoy scenery.
Enjoy! Enjoy! Enjoy!

52
00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:20,482
Maggie, would you like
to ride with me?

53
00:04:24,840 --> 00:04:26,001
On...

54
00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:50,964
Bart, why is your
mom riding

55
00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:53,122
a two-person bike
by herself?

56
00:04:53,240 --> 00:04:55,561
Ha-ha! She's lonely.

57
00:04:55,640 --> 00:04:56,880
Moms don't get lonely.

58
00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:06,849
Three hundred and six...

59
00:05:08,560 --> 00:05:10,927
Three hundred and seven...

60
00:05:16,920 --> 00:05:18,649
Hey, Mom!
Want to go for a ride?

61
00:05:18,720 --> 00:05:20,927
I'd love to.
I'll be right...

62
00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:22,001
Wait.

63
00:05:22,080 --> 00:05:23,605
Are you sure
you're not just trying

64
00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:25,569
to get me to make
pizza for breakfast?

65
00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:27,483
Woo-hoo!
Pizza for breakfast!

66
00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:30,325
Mom, I mean it.
I want to ride with you.

67
00:05:30,440 --> 00:05:31,441
Aww.

68
00:05:31,680 --> 00:05:33,170
I'll be right down.

69
00:05:33,240 --> 00:05:36,005
Hello, Dominos? What do
you mean you're not open?

70
00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:39,129
No, you call me back
during business hours.

71
00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:41,680
I'll show you who's
a recorded message!

72
00:05:46,160 --> 00:05:47,650
Puddle!

73
00:05:48,480 --> 00:05:51,131
I'm glad I could share
in their fun.

74
00:05:53,160 --> 00:05:56,004
Well, I heard
Neil Young sing about her.

75
00:05:58,040 --> 00:06:00,566
I heard ol' Neil
put her down.

76
00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:01,721
In the name of the...

77
00:06:01,840 --> 00:06:03,046
Hey!

78
00:06:03,120 --> 00:06:05,691
Well, I hope
Neil Young will remember.

79
00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:11,885
This southern man
don't need him 'round anyhow.

80
00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:13,644
Mom, who's Neil Young?

81
00:06:13,720 --> 00:06:17,964
He was a singer in the '60s, like
the Archies, and the Banana Splits.

82
00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:25,725
I'm a little worried. This part
of the county is unincorporated.

83
00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:29,327
Just to be safe, I'm gonna
dial 9-1 on my cell phone.

84
00:06:37,720 --> 00:06:40,200
A tea house?

85
00:06:40,280 --> 00:06:42,328
Want to go inside?
I don't know.

86
00:06:42,400 --> 00:06:44,243
Think they have video games?
Mmm, no.

87
00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:45,651
Batting case?
No.

88
00:06:45,720 --> 00:06:47,404
Rock climbing wall?
No.

89
00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:49,403
Robot musical review?
No.

90
00:06:49,480 --> 00:06:51,562
Zumanity by Cirque du Soleil?
No.

91
00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:52,920
Bathroom?
Yes!

92
00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:55,651
Well, that's really what I
need the most. Let's go.

93
00:07:00,880 --> 00:07:03,281
Wow, Mom! I love tea.

94
00:07:03,400 --> 00:07:04,970
You haven't had any tea.

95
00:07:06,240 --> 00:07:08,766
Yeah. Well, I still
love this place.

96
00:07:08,840 --> 00:07:10,922
Good afternoon, madam.

97
00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:13,571
Oh, and who's your
handsome gentleman friend?

98
00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:16,680
Oh, you.

99
00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:23,601
Don't do that
That hurts.

100
00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:24,681
Careful, careful.

101
00:07:24,760 --> 00:07:27,604
Hey, what's the big idea getting
trapped under that thing?

102
00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:28,806
Uh, long story.

103
00:07:28,880 --> 00:07:30,530
Uh, we were trying to
impress some girls

104
00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:32,443
and things kind of got away from us.

105
00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:34,329
Just for the record,
I regret nothing.

106
00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:40,011
Homer, how'd your
right arm get so strong?

107
00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:41,684
Just lifting this dumbbell.

108
00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:45,606
49,999, 50,000!

109
00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:49,966
I'm pretty happy with this baby.
Now it's lefty's turn.

110
00:07:50,040 --> 00:07:52,691
Oh, no, you don't.
I just got an idea.

111
00:07:52,760 --> 00:07:53,761
Listen.

112
00:07:56,160 --> 00:07:58,162
Hey, you... Huh?

113
00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:00,364
What? Hey...

114
00:08:01,880 --> 00:08:03,041
Why...

115
00:08:04,520 --> 00:08:05,521
Yeah.

116
00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:11,887
Mom, all we have is carrot
sticks and fresh fruit.

117
00:08:11,960 --> 00:08:15,203
Well, we could bike lo the
teashop and have some cake.

118
00:08:15,280 --> 00:08:17,089
All right!
Pedal to the kettle!

119
00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:19,481
Hey, Bart. They're
testing me for lazy eye.

120
00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:20,726
You want to come with?

121
00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:24,162
Oh, sorry, Milhouse.
I've got plans.

122
00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:27,926
Okay. I'll bring you back
an eye care pamphlet.

123
00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:32,164
Okay, here comes our victim.
Let's bash his head in.

124
00:08:32,280 --> 00:08:34,681
Hey, Moe, I thought you
were just gonna hustle him?

125
00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:37,331
Oh, right. I was thinking
of another thing I got going.

126
00:08:42,680 --> 00:08:47,447
Give me a bottle of bourbon. I got a
new liver and I'm breaking it in.

127
00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:50,606
Excuse me,
Mr. Bartender, sir.

128
00:08:50,680 --> 00:08:53,365
May I have a sugar-free
ginger ale?

129
00:08:53,440 --> 00:08:57,047
And, uh, make it flat,
the bubbles burn my buds.

130
00:08:57,120 --> 00:09:01,728
Galdurnit, son. What the
hell kind of sissy are you?

131
00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:04,041
Hey, are you calling
my life partner a sissy?

132
00:09:04,120 --> 00:09:06,771
Because 100 bucks says he could
whoop you in arm wrestling.

133
00:09:06,840 --> 00:09:09,411
A Texas penny it is.

134
00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:10,641
Yee-haw!

135
00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:13,891
Galdangit!

136
00:09:13,960 --> 00:09:16,884
I've been played
like a dimwit's kazoo!

137
00:09:19,320 --> 00:09:21,971
Yes! Homer, we make
a dynamite team. Huh?

138
00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:25,243
With your arm and my head gunk,
we're going right to the top.

139
00:09:25,320 --> 00:09:26,367
Whoa!

140
00:09:26,440 --> 00:09:28,727
This is one
Texan who don't like

141
00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:31,087
when he's made
out to be a fool.

142
00:09:31,160 --> 00:09:32,730
Well, uh, what do you like?

143
00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:36,845
I don't know. A good book,
long walk on the beach.

144
00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:41,801
So, we, uh... We kind of
even things up here?

145
00:09:41,880 --> 00:09:43,962
Not yet. I want to play
some Frisbee.

146
00:09:46,160 --> 00:09:47,605
You know, honey,
I've really started

147
00:09:47,680 --> 00:09:49,887
to look forward to
our little bike rides.

148
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:51,007
Me, too, Mother.

149
00:09:51,080 --> 00:09:52,491
Oh, such respect?

150
00:09:52,560 --> 00:09:54,767
You could grow up
to be a doorman.

151
00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:03,488
Loyal customers, we have
been forced to close forever.

152
00:10:03,560 --> 00:10:06,484
It seems our cakes were
filled with rat droppings.

153
00:10:06,560 --> 00:10:08,483
It's not that
we're bad people,

154
00:10:08,560 --> 00:10:10,961
we just weren't
paying close attention.

155
00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:12,280
Ta-ta.

156
00:10:12,840 --> 00:10:13,841
What did it say?

157
00:10:15,360 --> 00:10:16,361
She died.

158
00:10:19,440 --> 00:10:21,568
Well, Bart,
I guess that's it.

159
00:10:21,680 --> 00:10:23,967
We'll have to go back
to our separate things.

160
00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:26,361
Hey, we could have tea
in my tree house.

161
00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:31,401
You invited me to
your tree house?

162
00:10:31,480 --> 00:10:33,323
Wow!

163
00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:36,483
That's like Bruce Wayne letting
his mother into the Bat Club.

164
00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:47,043
So, is that standing water?

165
00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:48,406
Yeah.

166
00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:51,484
You know, that puddle started
life as a bowl of cereal.

167
00:10:55,240 --> 00:10:56,605
I think I might be able

168
00:10:56,680 --> 00:10:59,729
to turn this tree house
into a teahouse.

169
00:11:02,760 --> 00:11:05,047
Mom, this is great!

170
00:11:05,120 --> 00:11:07,122
Makes our real house
look like a pile of crap.

171
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:08,884
And I threw out
all your old comics.

172
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:09,961
Mom!

173
00:11:11,360 --> 00:11:12,521
Just kidding.

174
00:11:12,600 --> 00:11:14,523
Today's mom knows
to seal them in Mylar

175
00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:16,489
so you can never
read them again.

176
00:11:16,560 --> 00:11:18,767
Never, ever again.

177
00:11:20,920 --> 00:11:22,081
Where are you two going?

178
00:11:22,200 --> 00:11:24,726
I'm joining a professional
arm wrestling circuit.

179
00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:28,641
Uh-huh, and how will this affect
your job at the power plant?

180
00:11:28,720 --> 00:11:30,210
Negatively, I assume.

181
00:11:30,280 --> 00:11:32,851
Oh, well, we're off
to buy a new tea set.

182
00:11:34,240 --> 00:11:35,287
Have fun.

183
00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:40,485
Jeez, she didn't seem
angry or anything.

184
00:11:40,560 --> 00:11:42,688
Maybe she doesn't care
anymore.

185
00:11:42,760 --> 00:11:44,888
Forget about her, Homer.
She's dead to you now.

186
00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:46,450
Okay.

187
00:11:46,520 --> 00:11:47,760
Now, if we get bored
on the bus,

188
00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:49,882
I got a book of
brainteasers here.

189
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:50,961
Let's see.

190
00:11:51,120 --> 00:11:53,726
Oh! "Brothers and sisters
have I none,

191
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:57,407
"but this man's
father is my father's son."

192
00:11:59,320 --> 00:12:01,084
Ah, screw you,
you stupid thing!

193
00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:06,450
"He is my son."
That blows.

194
00:12:09,480 --> 00:12:11,050
I can't wait to use

195
00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:12,963
our new Krusty the
Clown tea service.

196
00:12:13,040 --> 00:12:14,246
Me neither.

197
00:12:14,320 --> 00:12:17,608
Oh, my God! I took the salesman's pen.
I'll be right back.

198
00:12:21,040 --> 00:12:24,408
Green tea? What's that,
Mr. T's Irish brother?

199
00:12:26,720 --> 00:12:29,883
Earl Grey?
I'd rather have Linda Gray.

200
00:12:29,960 --> 00:12:31,450
Is she still alive?

201
00:12:31,560 --> 00:12:34,006
What's next? What the hell,
I'm not doing that one.

202
00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:36,447
Hey, Simpson.

203
00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:39,251
What are you gonna do with that teapot?
Gay out?

204
00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:41,442
I'll answer for you. Yes.

205
00:12:41,520 --> 00:12:42,521
What? Um...

206
00:12:43,880 --> 00:12:45,723
I just shoplifted
this bad boy.

207
00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:47,484
Housewares never
knew what hit 'em.

208
00:12:47,560 --> 00:12:49,324
Why didn't you steal
something cool?

209
00:12:49,520 --> 00:12:54,162
Uh, because I'm gonna bring it back
to the store for store credit.

210
00:12:54,240 --> 00:12:57,289
How are you gonna get credit
without a gift receipt, ass?

211
00:12:57,360 --> 00:12:58,771
Um, well...

212
00:12:58,880 --> 00:13:00,962
We've seen you hanging out
with your mom, Simpson.

213
00:13:01,040 --> 00:13:03,805
Word on the street
is you're a mama's boy.

214
00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:09,641
Hey! There is no way that
Bart Simpson is a mama's boy.

215
00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:12,850
Oh, Bart!
Aren't they jazzy?

216
00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:15,526
They match the new curtains
we hung in your tree house.

217
00:13:17,000 --> 00:13:18,000
Here, try yours on.

218
00:13:18,040 --> 00:13:19,644
I got you a child's
large because

219
00:13:19,720 --> 00:13:21,404
your tummy's getting
kind of bloopy

220
00:13:21,480 --> 00:13:23,164
from all the cakes
we've been having.

221
00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:26,204
Somebody here
likes princess cakes.

222
00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:27,645
Princess cake?

223
00:13:27,720 --> 00:13:30,883
Bart, you just got yourself
a nickname for life.

224
00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:34,123
Hey, Princess Cake,
want some princess cake?

225
00:13:35,560 --> 00:13:37,642
Bart, are you having a fight
with your boyfriends?

226
00:13:37,720 --> 00:13:40,326
Shut up! I don't want
your stupid sweatshirt!

227
00:13:40,560 --> 00:13:42,608
Or your tea set!

228
00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:46,367
Smashing voids my warranty.
Have a good life.

229
00:13:46,440 --> 00:13:50,764
Mom, I only hung out with you
because I felt sorry for you.

230
00:13:52,800 --> 00:13:54,325
That was weird.

231
00:13:54,400 --> 00:13:55,640
Will you teach us
how to smoke?

232
00:13:55,720 --> 00:13:56,721
No!

233
00:14:04,080 --> 00:14:06,765
I can't believe she suckered
me into being a mama's boy.

234
00:14:06,840 --> 00:14:08,968
I got to make this
place mine again.

235
00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:15,404
It's gonna take me weeks to
get the booger wall back up.

236
00:14:17,480 --> 00:14:18,641
Bart?

237
00:14:18,720 --> 00:14:19,801
You're not allowed in here!

238
00:14:19,920 --> 00:14:21,888
Can't you read the sign?
You mean this?

239
00:14:21,960 --> 00:14:24,440
Ay, caramba!

240
00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:28,121
I'm worried about Mom.

241
00:14:28,680 --> 00:14:31,684
She's been sitting there just
petting the dog for two hours.

242
00:15:05,560 --> 00:15:06,561
Hey, Mom.

243
00:15:07,320 --> 00:15:11,325
Hello, Bart. Just so you
know, I sold our bike.

244
00:15:11,400 --> 00:15:13,607
Faster! Faster!

245
00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:19,602
But we had so much
fun on that bike.

246
00:15:21,000 --> 00:15:23,685
Mom, I really did like
hanging out with you.

247
00:15:29,320 --> 00:15:33,211
You know, there's a karaoke
night at school tomorrow.

248
00:15:33,280 --> 00:15:37,444
Some of the little kids are bringing
their parents. Do you want to go?

249
00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:39,921
Really? Can we do a duet?

250
00:15:40,040 --> 00:15:42,611
Sure, why not?

251
00:15:42,680 --> 00:15:43,966
It'll be fun.

252
00:15:44,040 --> 00:15:45,644
It's still happening!

253
00:15:52,080 --> 00:15:55,926
Oh, I can't believe Marge hasn't called me.
Maybe I should go home.

254
00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:57,126
Oh, Marge called you.

255
00:15:57,200 --> 00:15:59,089
She said, uh,
that she loves you

256
00:15:59,160 --> 00:16:00,844
and she hopes you
break the guy's arm

257
00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:02,684
so hard that it pokes through his skin.

258
00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:04,046
Did she say anything else?

259
00:16:04,120 --> 00:16:05,531
Yeah. She said
to shut up and stop

260
00:16:05,600 --> 00:16:07,125
asking questions
and listen to Moe.

261
00:16:07,480 --> 00:16:09,847
Oh, Marge.
I love her so much.

262
00:16:09,920 --> 00:16:12,216
Now, Homer, you got to keep your
head in the game, all right?

263
00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:15,323
Your first opponent is Leftie
"The Righty" Leftwright.

264
00:16:18,840 --> 00:16:20,365
Whoa. He looks tough.

265
00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:23,523
Yeah. He only lost once, in
his fight against illiteracy.

266
00:16:23,600 --> 00:16:27,127
I can relate. I fought that
foe and lost many times.

267
00:16:33,080 --> 00:16:34,809
Oh, Marge isn't home.

268
00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:36,041
Homer, focus.

269
00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:38,202
Moe, I'm starting
to have grave doubts

270
00:16:38,280 --> 00:16:40,806
about this thing I barely
liked in the first place.

271
00:16:40,880 --> 00:16:41,880
Come on, Homer.

272
00:16:41,920 --> 00:16:43,843
We can make it all the way
to the quarter-finals

273
00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:47,766
for the eastern division, class
B over 35 amateur grouping!

274
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:51,162
Sorry, Moe. The place for
my arm is around my wife.

275
00:16:52,320 --> 00:16:53,401
Homer, come back.

276
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:56,086
You've got my teeth whitening
system in your suitcase.

277
00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:01,410
Let's see. What would be
a good duet? Hmm.

278
00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:05,286
Just the Two of Us,
You and Me Against the World,

279
00:17:05,360 --> 00:17:06,521
Ebony and Ivory...

280
00:17:06,600 --> 00:17:08,090
Ebony and Ivory?

281
00:17:08,160 --> 00:17:11,164
I'm afraid that song's
taken by me and my mother.

282
00:17:11,240 --> 00:17:15,131
You know, people say when we're on
stage, it's more like "scary-oke."

283
00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:16,850
Uh, scary talented,
I assume.

284
00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:19,082
I'm singing a song
with Bart tonight.

285
00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:21,640
Capital! My mother and I
have been performing together

286
00:17:21,720 --> 00:17:24,929
since I was in fourth grade, and
it's really brought us closer.

287
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:29,528
Seymour! Where were you? A
brightly-colored car hurt my eyes.

288
00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:31,329
Don't worry, Mother.
I have your eye balm

289
00:17:31,400 --> 00:17:33,687
in my man-purse
right here.

290
00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:37,881
Good boy. You can push your
crib into Mommy's room tonight.

291
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:40,247
It's not a crib. It's a cot.

292
00:17:40,320 --> 00:17:42,891
If it has rails,
it's a crib!

293
00:17:47,360 --> 00:17:50,682
Where is my John Wayne?

294
00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:54,841
Where is my prairie sun?

295
00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:58,049
Where is my happy ending?

296
00:17:58,120 --> 00:18:01,841
Where have all
the cowboys gone?

297
00:18:08,560 --> 00:18:11,040
You know, Mother,
I wasn't sure about tonight.

298
00:18:11,160 --> 00:18:14,403
But seeing us dressed the same
really feels right.

299
00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:17,768
Well, now I'm not so sure about
the bells on the painters pants.

300
00:18:17,840 --> 00:18:20,207
Are you kidding?
I love my tinklies!

301
00:18:23,080 --> 00:18:27,563
Next up on the Springfield
Elementary Karaoke Showcase is.

302
00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:31,201
Skinner and Mrs. Skinner!

303
00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:40,722
Ebony and Ivory.

304
00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:46,204
Live together in
perfect harmony.

305
00:18:46,720 --> 00:18:47,960
Side by side

306
00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:51,408
on my piano keyboard.

307
00:18:51,560 --> 00:18:56,282
Oh, Lord, why don't we?

308
00:18:57,080 --> 00:18:59,651
No!

309
00:19:01,160 --> 00:19:02,969
Stop the showcase!

310
00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:05,810
Mrs. Simpson, please!

311
00:19:05,880 --> 00:19:09,521
Uh, hush up, Seymour. She's just
saying what we're all thinking.

312
00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:11,204
Mother,
what are you doing?

313
00:19:11,280 --> 00:19:13,965
Don't call me "Mother."
My name is Mom.

314
00:19:14,040 --> 00:19:16,691
And my son
is no mama's boy!

315
00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:20,607
Bart, you're a wild
heck-raiser

316
00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:22,961
and I don't want to
see you turn into that!

317
00:19:23,040 --> 00:19:24,040
What? A wall?

318
00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:26,401
Mom, I thought this
was what you wanted.

319
00:19:26,480 --> 00:19:28,847
Your job isn't
to worry about me.

320
00:19:28,920 --> 00:19:31,287
It's to give me things
to worry about.

321
00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:36,601
Hey, losers.

322
00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:40,162
I'm gonna do to you
what you did to these songs.

323
00:19:40,280 --> 00:19:41,770
Interpret them artistically?

324
00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:46,489
Die, die, die!

325
00:19:48,080 --> 00:19:50,401
We were gonna sing
My Sharona.

326
00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:59,362
Sweet Home Alabama.

327
00:20:01,080 --> 00:20:04,448
Where the skies are so blue.

328
00:20:05,960 --> 00:20:08,122
Sweet home Alabama.

329
00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:13,645
Lord, I'm coming home to you.

330
00:20:13,760 --> 00:20:14,761
Alabama!

331
00:20:15,920 --> 00:20:19,322
Marge, spending time with
you is more important to me

332
00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:22,483
than all the pie-eating
contests in the world.

333
00:20:22,560 --> 00:20:24,483
I thought it was
arm wrestling.

334
00:20:24,560 --> 00:20:26,562
I was in a pie-eating
contest on the way home.

335
00:20:26,640 --> 00:20:28,210
Now let's go to bed.

336
00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:36,483
Oh, my little
pretty one, my pretty one.

337
00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:39,723
When you gonna give me
some time, Sharona?

338
00:20:39,840 --> 00:20:43,083
Ooh, you make my motor run,
my motor run.

339
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:46,323
Gun it coming off the line,
Sharona.

340
00:20:46,400 --> 00:20:48,323
Never gonna stop,
give it up.

341
00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:50,971
Such a dirty mind,
always get it up.

342
00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:53,008
For the touch of
the younger kind.

343
00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:56,289
My, my, my, my, my, whoo.

344
00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:57,927
Whoa!

345
00:20:58,000 --> 00:20:59,889
That song
is a pop music footnote.

346
00:21:01,040 --> 00:21:02,610
I didn't say stop.

347
00:21:02,680 --> 00:21:08,648
My, my, my, my Sharona