1 00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:05,083 The Simpsons. 2 00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:26,011 You're listening to Nationwide Public Radio. 3 00:01:26,080 --> 00:01:27,366 It's now 2:00. 4 00:01:27,480 --> 00:01:30,723 Time for Verbal Tea, with Amy Levine-Gonzalez. 5 00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:36,203 Oh, boy! This is what sunny Sunday afternoons are for. 6 00:01:37,360 --> 00:01:42,207 Today, we'll discuss a dying form of Peruvian banjo music, 7 00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:45,363 with Dartmouth banjologist, Stefan Whitmore. 8 00:01:48,600 --> 00:01:50,967 It's just... It's not that good. 9 00:01:51,040 --> 00:01:52,280 In our second hour, 10 00:01:52,360 --> 00:01:55,125 humorist David Sedaris takes a wry look 11 00:01:55,200 --> 00:01:57,931 at overcrowding in America's prisons. 12 00:01:58,000 --> 00:01:59,126 Prison overcrowding? 13 00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:00,725 I've got a solution for that. 14 00:02:02,680 --> 00:02:03,681 Oh, my God! 15 00:02:05,160 --> 00:02:06,969 U-S-A! U-S-A! 16 00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:11,009 But, first, we're giving away tickets to the latest film 17 00:02:11,080 --> 00:02:14,402 by acclaimed director Mladzieul Klernt. 18 00:02:14,480 --> 00:02:16,847 Her films are so lyrical. 19 00:02:16,920 --> 00:02:18,649 The phone lines are gonna be jammed. 20 00:02:19,920 --> 00:02:24,244 Winner of the Romanian Film Festival's prestigious Golden Bucket... 21 00:02:24,320 --> 00:02:26,243 Holy crap! Someone's actually calling! 22 00:02:33,080 --> 00:02:36,846 Hey! I won four free movie tickets and it starts in half an hour! 23 00:02:36,920 --> 00:02:38,365 Free movie tickets? 24 00:02:38,440 --> 00:02:41,489 I feel like Roger Ebert or his kiss-ass new partner. 25 00:02:41,560 --> 00:02:43,642 But we don't have a sitter for Maggie. 26 00:02:44,640 --> 00:02:48,645 She'll be fine here under the watchful eye of Grandma Shark Week. 27 00:02:50,920 --> 00:02:53,730 A TV shark is not a babysitter. 28 00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:55,886 How about this guy? 29 00:02:55,960 --> 00:02:57,007 Homer! 30 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:03,530 Howdy, Homer. You here for a viewing of my shampooing? 31 00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:05,648 Shut up, Flanders. I need a favor. 32 00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:08,456 Would you mind watching Maggie for a while? It would only be until later. 33 00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:11,529 Sorry, but I promised to rewind videotapes for the poor. 34 00:03:11,600 --> 00:03:13,967 Come on, Flanders. Doesn't that Bible of yours 35 00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:15,530 say to love thy neighbor? 36 00:03:15,600 --> 00:03:17,682 Why won't you love me? 37 00:03:17,800 --> 00:03:19,882 All right, neighbor. I'll babysit. 38 00:03:19,960 --> 00:03:21,121 Thanks, Ned. 39 00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:24,049 You wear a bathing suit in the bathtub? 40 00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:26,361 Yeah, so I can't see my own shrinky-dink. 41 00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:28,371 Makes sense. 42 00:03:41,480 --> 00:03:45,007 Instead of video games, they have weird, free newspapers. 43 00:03:47,640 --> 00:03:49,642 Mom, am I "butch" or a "fem"? 44 00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:52,326 Honey, you can be anything you wanna be. 45 00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:57,884 This theater sucks. My seat's uncomfortable. 46 00:03:57,960 --> 00:03:59,769 The screen's only half a screen, 47 00:03:59,840 --> 00:04:01,365 And that guy's eating an apple. 48 00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:03,408 Would you care for a segment? 49 00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:04,481 Yes. 50 00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:28,763 What language is this? Gibby-Gabby? 51 00:04:28,840 --> 00:04:30,444 It's Albanian, 52 00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:33,524 but the producers added subtitles to make it commercial. 53 00:04:33,600 --> 00:04:37,650 Mom, I don't wanna read. It's the weekend. 54 00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:40,200 I've had enough. I'm leaving. 55 00:04:40,920 --> 00:04:44,720 Oh, I'm stuck! Why did I eat that apple segment? 56 00:04:53,240 --> 00:04:56,244 Sorry, Maggie. That's something to collect, not enjoy. 57 00:04:56,320 --> 00:04:58,084 It's one of my Humble Figurines. 58 00:04:58,160 --> 00:05:01,323 He scampered out of Parade Magazine and into my knickknack nook, 59 00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:03,687 and, well, his little buddies soon followed. 60 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:15,806 You like them, huh? Come on, I'll show you the other 300. 61 00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:19,011 How could this have... 62 00:05:23,280 --> 00:05:25,965 I feel so much empathy for those villagers. 63 00:05:26,240 --> 00:05:28,481 They had to drink their own tears. 64 00:05:28,560 --> 00:05:30,130 I was so bored, I cut the ponytail. 65 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:31,611 Off the guy sitting in front of us. 66 00:05:31,680 --> 00:05:34,524 "Look at me. I'm a grad student. I'm 30 years old, 67 00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:36,682 "and I made $600 last year." 68 00:05:36,760 --> 00:05:39,001 Bart, don't make fun of grad students. 69 00:05:39,080 --> 00:05:41,560 They just made a terrible life choice. 70 00:05:41,640 --> 00:05:45,406 Judas-bear, you're not touching your Last Supper. 71 00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:48,529 I can't eat because my conscience is heavy. 72 00:05:48,600 --> 00:05:51,444 Boys, enough of your shenanigans. It's bedtime. 73 00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:53,610 Mmm! Ned, let me give you 74 00:05:53,680 --> 00:05:55,125 a little something for babysitting. 75 00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:57,045 I can't take money from a neighbor. 76 00:05:57,120 --> 00:05:59,726 Although business at the Leftorium's been pretty slow 77 00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:01,882 since that big chain store came to town. 78 00:06:05,400 --> 00:06:07,050 You've got a big house, Ned. 79 00:06:07,120 --> 00:06:08,360 If you need extra money, 80 00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:10,010 why don't you rent out a room? 81 00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:13,129 Well, it might be fun to be a landlord... Land fella. 82 00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:14,929 There's only one Lord. 83 00:06:17,960 --> 00:06:19,121 I need a place to crash 84 00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:20,201 while my mom's drying out. 85 00:06:20,280 --> 00:06:21,725 Well, I'd love to help you out, 86 00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:23,928 but you do have to be over 18. 87 00:06:24,000 --> 00:06:25,968 I am. Check out my ID. 88 00:06:26,640 --> 00:06:28,563 Wait, this is my license. 89 00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:29,971 No, it's not, you hump. 90 00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:35,325 Well, I do appreciate 91 00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:36,696 that you've got a cashier's check. 92 00:06:36,720 --> 00:06:38,131 Now, do you have any pets? 93 00:06:43,560 --> 00:06:46,086 I am Katja and this is Vicki. 94 00:06:46,160 --> 00:06:49,050 We make much study at community college. 95 00:06:49,120 --> 00:06:50,770 We're, like, here about the room. 96 00:06:50,840 --> 00:06:51,841 We moved out of our dorm. 97 00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:53,684 Because it was, like, co-ed. 98 00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:57,881 Sometimes we saw the boys in their robes. 99 00:06:57,960 --> 00:07:01,851 You poor thing. Now, I've heard about those robes. 100 00:07:01,920 --> 00:07:03,251 Flapping everywhere. 101 00:07:03,360 --> 00:07:06,045 Girls, welcome to your very own Ned and Breakfast. 102 00:07:06,120 --> 00:07:08,122 Silly talk means "yes"? 103 00:07:15,360 --> 00:07:16,566 Here's your room, ladies. 104 00:07:16,640 --> 00:07:19,689 You can catch some z's while you earn those degrees. 105 00:07:21,080 --> 00:07:23,560 You rhyme like Snoopy-Dogg. 106 00:07:23,640 --> 00:07:25,483 Well, thank you. 107 00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:40,247 I know what we can ask Jeeves. Why does he suck? 108 00:07:40,320 --> 00:07:42,163 Hey! A banner ad! 109 00:07:42,240 --> 00:07:44,049 Sexyslumberparty.com? 110 00:07:44,240 --> 00:07:46,720 It's flashing. We better click it. 111 00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:56,523 Katja, do you think anyone's watching? 112 00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:57,761 If they are, 113 00:07:57,840 --> 00:08:01,367 they will see us explore our sexhood without restraint. 114 00:08:01,440 --> 00:08:04,125 Hey, this is one of those dirty websites. 115 00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:06,885 Two girls? Who would want that? 116 00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:15,209 You may inside come. 117 00:08:15,280 --> 00:08:18,489 I got phi beta cappuccinos for Ned's pre-meds. 118 00:08:18,600 --> 00:08:20,204 Flanders? 119 00:08:20,440 --> 00:08:21,441 That's odd. 120 00:08:21,760 --> 00:08:24,331 I could've sworn I just heard someone shriek my name. 121 00:08:24,440 --> 00:08:25,441 You heard nothing! 122 00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:26,681 That's better. 123 00:08:33,080 --> 00:08:36,004 Spank me again with little boy's picture. 124 00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:41,650 What are you kids laughing at? 125 00:08:41,720 --> 00:08:43,563 And if you say Jimmy Fallon, 126 00:08:43,640 --> 00:08:45,165 I'll know you're lying. 127 00:08:45,560 --> 00:08:47,642 Scantily clad co-eds? 128 00:08:48,120 --> 00:08:50,521 Why, you little... 129 00:08:50,840 --> 00:08:52,171 To have a libido... 130 00:08:52,240 --> 00:08:54,129 Dad, look who's in there. 131 00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:55,486 Flanders? 132 00:08:58,240 --> 00:09:00,447 He doesn't even know what's going on! 133 00:09:01,480 --> 00:09:03,562 Wait'll I tell everyone about this. 134 00:09:03,640 --> 00:09:06,041 I'll feel important without drinking. 135 00:09:06,120 --> 00:09:07,724 That'll be weird. 136 00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:09,770 What a combination. 137 00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:12,366 Hot chicks and stupid Flanders. 138 00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:17,245 And you say Mr. Flanders remains completely ignorant 139 00:09:17,320 --> 00:09:19,402 of their dot-Kama-sutra? 140 00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:22,083 Yup, and nobody's telling him. 141 00:09:22,160 --> 00:09:24,288 Not even his good buddy, God! 142 00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:28,490 Boy, nothing is sexier than still photos in a girlie magazine. 143 00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:29,801 Whoa! 144 00:09:29,920 --> 00:09:31,251 Sensual, isn't it? 145 00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:33,401 And the best part is, 146 00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:35,244 Stupid Flanders doesn't even know 147 00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:37,448 it's happening in his stupid house. 148 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:40,490 Hence my nickname, Stupid Flanders. 149 00:09:43,240 --> 00:09:44,765 Hey, Moses. Are you a loser? 150 00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:46,126 "Yes, I am, Homer." 151 00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:54,281 How are those two comely boarders of yours, Ned? 152 00:09:54,360 --> 00:09:56,089 Well, Mel, they're swell. 153 00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:58,766 Oh, yeah. They're just what my laptop needed. 154 00:10:06,400 --> 00:10:07,606 Son, I need to pee, 155 00:10:07,680 --> 00:10:09,011 but I can't stop watching. 156 00:10:09,080 --> 00:10:10,570 Fetch me a bottle. Come on, Dad. 157 00:10:10,640 --> 00:10:12,324 I've seen you hit the toilet from here. 158 00:10:12,400 --> 00:10:14,562 What are you two doing? Uh... 159 00:10:14,680 --> 00:10:17,047 We're watching the latest photos from Mars. 160 00:10:17,120 --> 00:10:19,043 Ho-ho! Great stuff. Worth every billion. 161 00:10:22,200 --> 00:10:25,249 Bart, turn away from that screen and look out the window! 162 00:10:25,560 --> 00:10:27,085 No problemo. 163 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:32,091 It's happening in Ned's house! 164 00:10:32,160 --> 00:10:33,321 Why would he allow that? 165 00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:37,724 Well, that's obvious. He doesn't even know. 166 00:10:43,440 --> 00:10:45,920 Come on. You tell him right now. 167 00:10:46,040 --> 00:10:48,611 Ned, Homer has something to tell you. 168 00:10:50,520 --> 00:10:53,171 I'm thinking about getting a yogurt franchise. 169 00:10:53,240 --> 00:10:55,481 - It's called Plops. - It's... 170 00:10:56,480 --> 00:10:58,403 You know what I mean. 171 00:11:00,920 --> 00:11:04,208 Okay. Flanders, you see... 172 00:11:04,520 --> 00:11:07,763 You soft-core sophomores took advantage of my trustful nature 173 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:11,162 and sullied the Internet by putting pornography on it! 174 00:11:11,240 --> 00:11:12,605 Get out! 175 00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:23,443 The whole town is laughing at me behind my back. 176 00:11:23,680 --> 00:11:25,842 I guess you're the only real friend I have. 177 00:11:25,920 --> 00:11:26,921 Are you kidding? 178 00:11:27,040 --> 00:11:30,169 Homer's the one what wised us up to the sexy goings-on. 179 00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:32,529 Homer, is this true? 180 00:11:32,600 --> 00:11:36,446 Ned, I had no choice. It was just so funny. 181 00:11:37,360 --> 00:11:39,681 The Bible says, "Cast your bread upon the waters." 182 00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:42,087 But all I got was a bunch of soggy bread. 183 00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:44,641 Mmm. Soggy... 184 00:11:44,720 --> 00:11:46,927 Don't say it, Homer! This is not the time! 185 00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:48,001 ...bread. 186 00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:56,723 What's wrong, Daddy? 187 00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:58,040 Well, Toddy, you know how I said 188 00:11:58,120 --> 00:12:00,009 our friends are like the Canaanites? 189 00:12:00,080 --> 00:12:02,526 Today I realized they're more like the Midianites. 190 00:12:03,920 --> 00:12:07,129 I wish we lived in a place more like the America of yesteryear 191 00:12:07,200 --> 00:12:09,726 that only exists in the brains of us Republicans. 192 00:12:17,160 --> 00:12:18,924 "Made in Humbleton, PA." 193 00:12:19,880 --> 00:12:21,564 I don't usually make big life decisions 194 00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:22,896 based on things stamped on things 195 00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:24,126 that I bought at a garage sale, 196 00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:27,170 But corn dog it, boys, it's time for a change! 197 00:12:29,120 --> 00:12:31,600 Dad, I don't think you realize what you've done. 198 00:12:31,680 --> 00:12:35,480 You've totally humiliated the best friend the Simpsons ever had. 199 00:12:35,560 --> 00:12:39,929 You're right. But you know who the real victim is here? Ned. 200 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:42,287 That's what we've been trying to tell you! 201 00:12:42,360 --> 00:12:43,441 Oh, yeah. 202 00:12:48,160 --> 00:12:49,525 What's this? 203 00:12:49,640 --> 00:12:51,563 "Goodbye, Springfield"? 204 00:12:51,640 --> 00:12:54,086 "The Flanders family has pulled up stakes. 205 00:12:54,160 --> 00:12:57,164 "You have laughed at us for the last-diddly-ast time." 206 00:12:57,240 --> 00:12:59,447 "Last-diddly-ast"? 207 00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:05,924 He's gone! And it's all someone's fault! 208 00:13:16,680 --> 00:13:18,648 Well, Homer, you've driven away 209 00:13:18,720 --> 00:13:21,564 the best neighbor a family could ever want. 210 00:13:21,880 --> 00:13:24,360 But at least we have a chance to start fresh. 211 00:13:24,440 --> 00:13:27,250 So let's be on our best behavior, okay? 212 00:13:27,320 --> 00:13:30,324 Don't worry, Marge. I've taken every precaution. 213 00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:34,409 This is so humiliating. 214 00:13:35,360 --> 00:13:37,169 Well, at least your name's on the bowl. 215 00:13:43,920 --> 00:13:45,365 I submit! I submit! 216 00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:55,529 Hi, I'm Homer Simpson. I live next door. 217 00:13:57,600 --> 00:14:00,001 So, is that your whistle? 218 00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:01,764 Damn straight. Clay Roberts. 219 00:14:01,840 --> 00:14:04,002 I coach wrestling, so everybody calls me Coach. 220 00:14:04,080 --> 00:14:06,731 Listen, neighboreeno, 221 00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:09,326 I want to start our relationship off on the right foot, 222 00:14:09,400 --> 00:14:12,324 so if you need anything, anything at all... 223 00:14:12,720 --> 00:14:14,210 What jag-off left this here? 224 00:14:45,960 --> 00:14:47,644 Boys, we're home. 225 00:14:52,360 --> 00:14:53,361 Kick it. 226 00:14:56,080 --> 00:14:58,651 That's coming from next door! 227 00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:01,963 Don't worry, I'll straighten things out with Coach Clay. 228 00:15:02,040 --> 00:15:03,246 We're good buddies. 229 00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:05,926 We play this game called "Who can punch the softest?" 230 00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:08,367 And he always lets me win. 231 00:15:11,880 --> 00:15:13,616 Hey, Coach, do you mind turning down the music? 232 00:15:13,640 --> 00:15:14,971 My baby's trying to take a nap. 233 00:15:15,040 --> 00:15:18,010 That's too bad because my twins are just waking up, dude. 234 00:15:20,240 --> 00:15:21,526 Encourage me. 235 00:15:21,600 --> 00:15:23,045 Looking good. Feel the burn. 236 00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:25,088 Louder! You're a god! 237 00:15:25,160 --> 00:15:26,400 I can't think of anymore. 238 00:15:26,480 --> 00:15:27,811 Just say, "Go, 90, 90!" 239 00:15:27,880 --> 00:15:29,041 Go, go, go! 240 00:15:29,120 --> 00:15:31,327 Say it like you mean it, you wuss! 241 00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:39,444 Howdy, Humbletonian. 242 00:15:39,520 --> 00:15:41,284 Picnics and Pixy Stix! 243 00:15:41,360 --> 00:15:45,331 I'll see your smile and raise you a wink and a giggle. 244 00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:50,004 This town is sweeter than a cake made of pie. 245 00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:52,162 Even the dogs curb themselves. 246 00:15:57,480 --> 00:16:00,802 Everyone new begins here, in the dimple department. 247 00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:03,523 Can I start yesterday? 248 00:16:04,560 --> 00:16:06,562 There is one personal matter. 249 00:16:06,640 --> 00:16:10,008 I'm afraid you'll have to lose the hippie lip. 250 00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:12,647 Get rid of Dr. Fuzzenstein? 251 00:16:12,720 --> 00:16:16,884 Why, I couldn't dream of thinking about considering. 252 00:16:19,840 --> 00:16:21,001 I'll see what I can do. 253 00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:22,241 Very good. 254 00:16:22,320 --> 00:16:24,561 Until then, you can wear this. 255 00:16:31,080 --> 00:16:34,527 Daddy, why do you have to shave your nose-neighbor? 256 00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:36,489 You know what? I'm not gonna. 257 00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:40,326 My moustache has the right to life. It's my body and my choice! 258 00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:44,766 Bad Company. 259 00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:46,641 I can't deny. 260 00:16:51,160 --> 00:16:52,810 Bad, bad company. 261 00:16:54,560 --> 00:16:56,369 Until the day I die. 262 00:16:59,360 --> 00:17:01,761 Oh, yeah Until the day I die. 263 00:17:09,360 --> 00:17:10,441 This is for you. 264 00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:20,042 Tonight on "Celebrity Chop Shop," 265 00:17:20,120 --> 00:17:23,920 we sell the parts off Jason Bateman's Bentley. 266 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,843 What did you do to my car? 267 00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:27,843 Dude, you've been chop shopped! 268 00:17:27,920 --> 00:17:30,446 Why would you do that? How am I gonna get home? 269 00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:33,649 Chop shop! Chop shop! 270 00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:43,844 Hey! You knocked out my power. 271 00:17:43,920 --> 00:17:46,082 How am I supposed to eat without watching TV? 272 00:17:46,160 --> 00:17:48,527 Yeah. Something tells me you won't starve, huh? 273 00:17:48,600 --> 00:17:49,931 Huh, chief? 274 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:52,606 When are you gonna stop poking me? Will it be soon? 275 00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:54,250 Relax, dumbass. 276 00:17:54,320 --> 00:17:58,245 By the way. I borrowed some gas from your car, you dumb-ass! 277 00:17:58,400 --> 00:18:01,085 But I siphoned that gas from Flanders. 278 00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:02,605 Flanders. 279 00:18:02,680 --> 00:18:05,763 What are you doing, reminiscing? Like a woman? 280 00:18:05,840 --> 00:18:09,401 Like a woman who's made the biggest mistake of her life! 281 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:22,765 Homer? What are you doing here? 282 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:26,242 I was just driving around the Mid-Atlantic states, 283 00:18:26,320 --> 00:18:29,369 ringing doorbells at random. And I just... 284 00:18:30,800 --> 00:18:33,167 Who am I fooling with my awesome lies? 285 00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:36,050 I want you to come back to Springfield! 286 00:18:36,120 --> 00:18:38,930 Why? So you can make me a laughingstock again? 287 00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:41,890 No. I want to make you a respecting-stock. 288 00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:44,570 I don't know if you've noticed. 289 00:18:44,640 --> 00:18:47,291 But I borrowed a lot of your stuff over the years. 290 00:18:47,360 --> 00:18:49,169 Well, that is true. In fact... 291 00:18:49,240 --> 00:18:50,526 Shut up, Flanders. 292 00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:53,570 But some things I could never take from you. 293 00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:56,564 Your kindness, your gentle spirit, 294 00:18:56,640 --> 00:19:00,645 and your infinite patience with a big, dumb jerk like me. 295 00:19:00,720 --> 00:19:03,200 Ned, I don't deserve you as a neighbor, 296 00:19:03,280 --> 00:19:06,887 but will you forgive a young, handsome fool and come home? 297 00:19:06,960 --> 00:19:08,485 Homer, that's really touching. 298 00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:10,847 But my boys and I are trying to make a new start, 299 00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:13,406 and people here are a little bit more my cup of... 300 00:19:16,120 --> 00:19:18,600 Are there letters to pick up or no letters to pick up? 301 00:19:18,680 --> 00:19:20,842 I can't tell and I'm looking right at it. 302 00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:23,403 Ooh, that tears it! 303 00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:25,403 Boys, put on your goody two-shoes. 304 00:19:25,480 --> 00:19:27,926 We're moving back to Springfield! 305 00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:29,525 But I have a girlfriend. 306 00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:31,011 Now you've got a pen-pal. 307 00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:32,081 Yay! 308 00:19:32,440 --> 00:19:33,521 So you see, Mr. Roberts, 309 00:19:33,600 --> 00:19:35,523 I really would like my house back. 310 00:19:35,600 --> 00:19:38,729 Really? Well, that's too bad because I'm not leaving. 311 00:19:38,800 --> 00:19:40,404 See, I like this place, 312 00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:42,642 and I've already got fatso, here, broken in. 313 00:19:42,760 --> 00:19:44,808 Ain't that right, fatso? Huh? 314 00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:47,602 Yeah. Lam a little pudgy. 315 00:19:47,680 --> 00:19:49,921 You got me. Yeah. 316 00:19:50,120 --> 00:19:52,726 Now, Coach, I've tried to be Christian and respectful. 317 00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:55,007 But I guess I'm just gonna have to point out 318 00:19:55,080 --> 00:19:57,162 your $200,000 check bounced. 319 00:19:57,240 --> 00:19:59,402 Legally, I still own this house. 320 00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:01,403 Yeah? Tell it to the Marines! 321 00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:06,282 Okay! Okay, I give. Ow! 322 00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:11,242 Why did you do that? I was begging for mercy! 323 00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:13,209 I saw my advantage and I took it. 324 00:20:13,280 --> 00:20:15,169 That's what heroes do. 325 00:20:17,120 --> 00:20:20,681 Okay, Ned. Get ready for your welcome home surprise! 326 00:20:22,280 --> 00:20:25,523 Homer, did you steal the organ from the church? 327 00:20:25,600 --> 00:20:27,409 Maybe. We don't know that for sure. 328 00:20:27,480 --> 00:20:28,845 Well, you gotta take it back. 329 00:20:28,920 --> 00:20:30,126 After the party. 330 00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:36,690 It sure is great to look down my nose at everybody again. 331 00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:38,296 Mind if I waggle my finger a little bit? 332 00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:39,890 Go nuts. 333 00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:41,803 Flanders? Okay, that's it. 334 00:20:41,880 --> 00:20:43,484 It's really irritating!