1
00:00:02,794 --> 00:00:05,360
The Simpsons.

2
00:00:05,923 --> 00:00:07,049
A Star Is Born Again.

3
00:00:26,985 --> 00:00:29,477
Come on, come on,
let's get to the beach.

4
00:00:31,240 --> 00:00:33,840
Hold your horses. I was up all night
fishing out the drawstring...

5
00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:35,734
...from your father's swimsuit.

6
00:00:36,161 --> 00:00:38,059
It came out again.

7
00:00:40,123 --> 00:00:43,158
Well, I'm all set. I'm gonna be following
the latest designs...

8
00:00:43,794 --> 00:00:46,098
...from Modern Sandcastle Magazine.

9
00:00:46,630 --> 00:00:47,840
Well, I'm all set too.

10
00:00:50,342 --> 00:00:52,907
Then all that's left
is to protect Maggie from the sun.

11
00:01:01,687 --> 00:01:03,991
I think she needs a diaper change.

12
00:01:04,898 --> 00:01:06,400
Well, it ain't happening today.

13
00:01:08,777 --> 00:01:10,936
Look, everybody, here they come.

14
00:01:11,446 --> 00:01:14,408
Once again we celebrate
Springfield's most beloved event.

15
00:01:15,033 --> 00:01:17,703
For each year,
on the third Tuesday of May sweeps...

16
00:01:18,287 --> 00:01:21,102
...we witness the return
of the stinging red jellyfish.

17
00:01:29,047 --> 00:01:31,164
What a sight. It happens every year...

18
00:01:31,675 --> 00:01:33,833
...like the swallows
returning to Capistrano.

19
00:01:34,344 --> 00:01:36,242
Or the Fox network
getting a new president.

20
00:01:37,431 --> 00:01:38,932
I made a new friend.

21
00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:45,616
I'm going to Africa...

22
00:01:46,064 --> 00:01:51,486
...to see lions and giraffes and monkeys
and Santa and gorillas and...

23
00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:55,261
Daddy, why is everyone so happy
the jellyfish are back?

24
00:01:55,866 --> 00:01:59,234
Well, in the old days, people thought
jellyfish venom had curative properties.

25
00:01:59,912 --> 00:02:01,809
Now we know
it just makes things a lot worse.

26
00:02:02,289 --> 00:02:04,854
- Like laser eye surgery?
- Exactly.

27
00:02:08,754 --> 00:02:12,382
Jellyfish, along you came.

28
00:02:13,091 --> 00:02:15,834
And right away I'm stunned.

29
00:02:16,428 --> 00:02:20,787
Sweet words I long to whisper.

30
00:02:21,600 --> 00:02:24,415
But you've paralyzed my tongue.

31
00:02:25,020 --> 00:02:27,397
Oh, what a magical evening.

32
00:02:27,940 --> 00:02:31,412
The moonlight, the music, the water.

33
00:02:32,110 --> 00:02:35,145
Enough talk. Dip me, my love.

34
00:02:37,741 --> 00:02:39,754
Lower. Lower.

35
00:02:43,455 --> 00:02:44,550
Lower.

36
00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:48,450
Ah. This is as romantic
as the night I proposed.

37
00:02:49,086 --> 00:02:51,098
Maybe we can have this band play
at our wedding.

38
00:02:51,588 --> 00:02:54,080
I was hoping we could use
this audio cassette.

39
00:02:54,633 --> 00:02:58,408
- Seymour, we've got to have a band.
- Fine. But no cake.

40
00:02:59,137 --> 00:03:02,099
Sarah, you're as lovely
as the day I first arrested you.

41
00:03:02,724 --> 00:03:04,445
Oh, Clancy, ha, ha.

42
00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:07,312
You know, I planted that crystal meth
just to meet you.

43
00:03:07,855 --> 00:03:09,168
I was so shy.

44
00:03:10,858 --> 00:03:13,788
Ah, well, Sea Captain, looks like
you and I are sailing solo tonight?

45
00:03:14,403 --> 00:03:15,936
Are you hitting on me?

46
00:03:16,363 --> 00:03:19,616
Because I don't do that... on land.

47
00:03:20,284 --> 00:03:22,661
Well, guess I might as well head back
to my store.

48
00:03:23,203 --> 00:03:27,228
I got a date with some twins,
the state and federal tax forms.

49
00:03:30,752 --> 00:03:34,412
Poor Ned.
This is his first Jellyfish Festival alone.

50
00:03:35,132 --> 00:03:37,697
I know.
And it doesn't get any easier from here.

51
00:03:38,260 --> 00:03:43,609
There's the Tongue Kissing Festival,
Cinco de Ocho, the Hobo Oscars.

52
00:03:44,558 --> 00:03:46,602
Days just made for lovers.

53
00:03:47,102 --> 00:03:49,552
Not widowers, lovers.

54
00:04:07,706 --> 00:04:08,706
"Form of business"?

55
00:04:10,167 --> 00:04:11,376
Sole proprietorship.

56
00:04:11,752 --> 00:04:13,504
"Owner's marital status"?

57
00:04:13,962 --> 00:04:16,006
Happily married to a dead woman.

58
00:04:17,758 --> 00:04:19,332
Excuse me. Are you open?

59
00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:21,657
Mm-hm. Open as a tomb on Easter.

60
00:04:22,137 --> 00:04:23,889
What can I ding-dong-diddily do
for you?

61
00:04:25,557 --> 00:04:27,197
Boy, they don't make them
like you in L.A.

62
00:04:27,559 --> 00:04:28,559
Oh, I should say not.

63
00:04:28,769 --> 00:04:31,876
I gave up on L.A. when those TV people
made that poor nun fly.

64
00:04:32,523 --> 00:04:35,192
All those Puerto Ricans
looking up her dress. That's not right.

65
00:04:37,027 --> 00:04:39,217
Do you have any left-handed
eyelash curlers?

66
00:04:39,738 --> 00:04:41,167
Do I?

67
00:04:41,615 --> 00:04:43,805
No, I don't.
But I can have them here by Tuesday.

68
00:04:44,326 --> 00:04:48,132
Well...
For now, I'll take a left-handed crimper.

69
00:04:52,918 --> 00:04:54,127
Why, you are gorgeous.

70
00:04:56,630 --> 00:04:59,226
- You don't know who I am, do you?
- I sure do.

71
00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:02,688
You're the most important person in
the world because you're my customer.

72
00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:06,630
Are you for real?

73
00:05:07,099 --> 00:05:08,673
I'm as real as the nose on your face.

74
00:05:09,101 --> 00:05:10,488
Yeah. Real.

75
00:05:12,229 --> 00:05:14,168
Well, it looks good.
And it sounds pretty too.

76
00:05:14,648 --> 00:05:17,213
Thanks. I'll see you later.

77
00:05:19,736 --> 00:05:22,520
I'm here for a while
and I don't really know anyone.

78
00:05:23,115 --> 00:05:24,835
Would you like to have dinner
tomorrow?

79
00:05:25,284 --> 00:05:27,400
A woman asking a man out?

80
00:05:27,911 --> 00:05:29,413
Well. Well, why not?

81
00:05:29,830 --> 00:05:31,655
And maybe I'll eat my steak
with a spoon.

82
00:05:32,124 --> 00:05:34,866
Call me. I'm staying
at the Springfield Four Seasons.

83
00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:38,390
Ask for Zelda Fitzgerald.

84
00:05:39,256 --> 00:05:41,894
What the...?
That's a pseu-diddilyeudonym.

85
00:05:42,634 --> 00:05:45,783
Well, I've got a date
With a girl with no name.

86
00:05:46,430 --> 00:05:49,099
It sure feels good
To be back in the game.

87
00:05:49,683 --> 00:05:52,540
At dessert
Maybe I can ask her her name.

88
00:05:53,145 --> 00:05:55,595
Because I can't pray for her
Without the right name.

89
00:05:56,148 --> 00:05:58,014
Ba-doo-doo-doo-doo...

90
00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:07,993
I've got a date with a movie star?

91
00:06:08,410 --> 00:06:11,298
Sure you do. And I'm going
apple picking with Scooby-Doo.

92
00:06:23,675 --> 00:06:25,323
Psst! Homer.

93
00:06:25,761 --> 00:06:28,910
Flanders. Can't a man just drink alone
on a Wednesday morning?

94
00:06:29,556 --> 00:06:30,556
I need your advice.

95
00:06:30,766 --> 00:06:32,226
It's about a lady.

96
00:06:34,019 --> 00:06:37,752
Let me guess. Skinner's mother?
She sure knows how to swing it.

97
00:06:38,482 --> 00:06:41,808
No, it's Sara Sloane.
I have a date with her tonight.

98
00:06:42,486 --> 00:06:44,498
Sara Sloane? The movie star?

99
00:06:44,988 --> 00:06:48,544
Yup. Why would that Twinkie wanna
go out with a Ding Dong like me?

100
00:06:49,243 --> 00:06:51,766
Flanders, I mix Twinkies
and Ding Dongs all the time.

101
00:06:52,329 --> 00:06:53,758
In Europe, they call it a Dinkie.

102
00:06:54,164 --> 00:06:57,678
Well, sir, that's very encouraging,
but I can't date a movie star.

103
00:06:58,377 --> 00:07:00,754
I'm no Arthur Miller or Lyle Lovett.

104
00:07:01,296 --> 00:07:02,652
Now, wait just a minute.

105
00:07:03,048 --> 00:07:05,238
I used to worry
Marge was too good for me.

106
00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:07,845
She was always thinking of ways
to improve me.

107
00:07:08,345 --> 00:07:12,224
But then part of her died
and she doesn't try anymore.

108
00:07:12,975 --> 00:07:14,257
So we're all where we wanna be.

109
00:07:18,313 --> 00:07:21,056
I'm sorry for the disguise, Ned.
I don't wanna cause a commotion.

110
00:07:21,650 --> 00:07:24,003
Excuse me, Miss Sloane.
May I have an autograph?

111
00:07:24,027 --> 00:07:25,046
Excuse me, Miss Sloane.
May I have an autograph?

112
00:07:25,070 --> 00:07:27,927
- Sure.
- Oh, man, this is going right on eBay.

113
00:07:28,532 --> 00:07:30,398
I mean, my wall,
which I will sell on eBay.

114
00:07:30,868 --> 00:07:32,984
Sad to say, this isn't the worst I get.

115
00:07:33,495 --> 00:07:36,644
Oh, oh, can I just push this plastic cast
onto one of your boobs?

116
00:07:37,291 --> 00:07:38,719
Okay. Now you are the worst.

117
00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:43,724
Rod says "Marco." And darn it
if Todd doesn't say "Polo" right back.

118
00:07:45,632 --> 00:07:47,937
Oh, listen to me just
running my gums about my kids.

119
00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:50,001
You're probably bored silly.

120
00:07:50,429 --> 00:07:53,359
No. It's a nice change
from all the actors I usually date.

121
00:07:53,974 --> 00:07:57,707
All they wanna talk about is their Botox,
their Tae Bo or their Xbox.

122
00:07:59,688 --> 00:08:02,065
Sara, there's something
I've been dying to do all night.

123
00:08:02,608 --> 00:08:05,131
So let's just get it over with now
and hold hands.

124
00:08:11,408 --> 00:08:14,338
Heaven's gate. I'm gonna be tasting
you on my moustache for a week.

125
00:08:14,953 --> 00:08:16,079
Wanna try for a month?

126
00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:25,745
Sara Sloane has been involved
with every Tinseltown hunk...

127
00:08:26,340 --> 00:08:28,237
...from Affleck to Zmed.

128
00:08:28,717 --> 00:08:31,355
Well, yeah. She's had more stars on her
than Lisa's homework.

129
00:08:33,180 --> 00:08:34,900
Now she's dating Mr. Flanders.

130
00:08:35,349 --> 00:08:36,923
That's so romantic.

131
00:08:37,351 --> 00:08:38,779
Who the hell is Mr. Flanders?

132
00:08:39,186 --> 00:08:41,449
Oh, Flanders.

133
00:08:43,190 --> 00:08:46,339
Hello. Yes, I'm Ned Flanders'
close personal friend.

134
00:08:46,985 --> 00:08:48,664
That's right. Hot and heavy.

135
00:08:49,112 --> 00:08:50,614
They've never been happier.

136
00:08:51,031 --> 00:08:52,491
Oh, yeah, she does look pregnant.

137
00:08:52,908 --> 00:08:56,974
Now, who might you be? A tabloid?
Is that one of those really strong mints?

138
00:08:57,746 --> 00:08:59,206
Hello? Hello?

139
00:08:59,790 --> 00:09:01,323
Jesus is the rock.

140
00:09:01,750 --> 00:09:04,607
That rolls my blues away
Shooby-dooby, yeah, shooby-dooby.

141
00:09:05,212 --> 00:09:06,964
You guys are jamming.

142
00:09:07,422 --> 00:09:08,809
Ah! Daddy, she swore.

143
00:09:10,551 --> 00:09:13,335
You know,
I grew up in a house like this.

144
00:09:13,929 --> 00:09:16,640
I didn't know there were
people like you left in the world.

145
00:09:17,224 --> 00:09:19,455
Ha, ha, yup. We occupy
that useless mass of land...

146
00:09:19,977 --> 00:09:22,834
...between Los Angeles and New York
called America.

147
00:09:24,648 --> 00:09:26,660
Ned, I'm not sure
you should open the door.

148
00:09:27,150 --> 00:09:30,706
Oh, if someone took the time to press
that button, this is the least I can do.

149
00:09:31,405 --> 00:09:33,845
- Are you sleeping with Sara Sloane?
- Is that moustache real?

150
00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:35,792
Do you plan to kill Sara
like your last wife?

151
00:09:38,370 --> 00:09:41,081
It's the tabloids. Everybody, run.

152
00:09:41,665 --> 00:09:43,855
- Hey, come back.
- Pose, pose.

153
00:09:44,376 --> 00:09:47,045
Your carpeted floor
feels good on my toes.

154
00:09:50,048 --> 00:09:52,165
Come on. Let's concoct more lies.

155
00:09:58,557 --> 00:10:01,372
Zookeeper's Wife,
scene 102, take one. Action.

156
00:10:01,977 --> 00:10:03,218
Kiss me, Diego.

157
00:10:03,604 --> 00:10:05,793
But your husband's animals
are watching.

158
00:10:06,315 --> 00:10:08,661
Where do you think
I learned to do this?

159
00:10:14,031 --> 00:10:15,751
Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

160
00:10:16,200 --> 00:10:18,358
This movie is turning into
Sponge Bob No Pants.

161
00:10:18,869 --> 00:10:21,132
- Ugh, cut.
- Sir, there's no reason...

162
00:10:21,663 --> 00:10:24,009
...Sara needs to do this scene
in the altogether.

163
00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:25,594
Sam, he's got a point.

164
00:10:25,959 --> 00:10:27,784
Katharine Hepburn
never showed her breasts.

165
00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:31,652
- There's still time.
- I want a rewrite with no nudity.

166
00:10:32,341 --> 00:10:34,353
All right. But you're gonna
have to kiss a woman.

167
00:10:34,843 --> 00:10:36,960
Deal. Ned, we won.

168
00:10:37,471 --> 00:10:39,733
Yup. All we gotta do
is turn that woman into a fella...

169
00:10:40,265 --> 00:10:43,894
- ...and that kiss into a game of Scrabble.
- You are so sweet to look out for me.

170
00:10:44,603 --> 00:10:48,597
The public may not see me naked
but you just might.

171
00:10:49,358 --> 00:10:54,227
Ha, ha, well, that's, uh,
very interesting, uh...

172
00:10:55,113 --> 00:10:58,002
Easy, Ned.
Think of the Bible.

173
00:11:14,967 --> 00:11:17,782
Miss Sloane, I loved you
in Sleeping with Pinocchio...

174
00:11:18,387 --> 00:11:20,326
...and Honey,
I Scotchgarded the Kids.

175
00:11:20,806 --> 00:11:23,736
Thanks. I grew really close to the
actress who played my daughter.

176
00:11:24,351 --> 00:11:26,582
- I think she's in France or something.
- Hmm.

177
00:11:27,104 --> 00:11:29,523
And, Ned, I haven't seen you
this happy in years.

178
00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:33,777
I haven't felt this good
since we stole the 2000 election.

179
00:11:34,319 --> 00:11:36,259
Hey, don't blame me.
I voted for the green M&M.

180
00:11:37,990 --> 00:11:39,085
Ah! The paparazzi.

181
00:11:39,449 --> 00:11:41,274
I thought we fooled them
with our Cher-crow.

182
00:11:44,246 --> 00:11:46,509
Gypsies, tramps and thieves
We'd hear it from the people.

183
00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:48,542
Are you aware your daughter's gay?

184
00:11:48,959 --> 00:11:51,743
- Boy, those guys are such leeches.
- Moe, what are you doing here?

185
00:11:52,337 --> 00:11:56,039
Can't your old buddy, Moe, stop by with
questions from the Weekly World News?

186
00:11:56,758 --> 00:11:59,907
Uh, number one:
Sara, is it true you shoplifted a kayak?

187
00:12:00,554 --> 00:12:02,973
I'll have you know she pays
full price for her watercraft.

188
00:12:04,725 --> 00:12:07,321
- Rainier Wolfcastle.
- My ex-boyfriend.

189
00:12:07,895 --> 00:12:10,126
Sara, Liebchen, take me back.

190
00:12:10,647 --> 00:12:13,098
If tears could burst
through my muscular ducts...

191
00:12:13,650 --> 00:12:16,393
...I would cry like a baby
who was just hit by a hammer.

192
00:12:16,987 --> 00:12:18,926
Rainier, you're too jealous.

193
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:21,669
You beat up Jon Lovitz
because he presented me an award.

194
00:12:22,201 --> 00:12:25,235
Oh, come on. No one
misses a handshake that badly.

195
00:12:25,871 --> 00:12:28,759
Sorry. I found someone nice
who doesn't talk like a freak.

196
00:12:29,374 --> 00:12:30,803
Exact-a-tically-tacally.

197
00:12:31,210 --> 00:12:33,702
My libido has been terminated.

198
00:12:34,254 --> 00:12:36,048
Ned, I've never met a man like you.

199
00:12:36,507 --> 00:12:39,760
You're sensitive. You're in great shape.
You have a moustache.

200
00:12:40,427 --> 00:12:41,553
And yet you're not gay.

201
00:12:41,929 --> 00:12:43,138
Oh, no way.

202
00:12:43,514 --> 00:12:46,371
I won't even eat vegetables
over 2 inches long.

203
00:12:46,975 --> 00:12:51,000
So anyway, uh, hmm,
your movie's wrapping up soon.

204
00:12:51,772 --> 00:12:54,879
I guess you'll be heading out
on the first bus to the airport.

205
00:12:55,526 --> 00:12:58,383
If you ride with a friend,
you can save 20 bucks.

206
00:12:58,987 --> 00:13:00,040
Ned, I know this is fast.

207
00:13:00,405 --> 00:13:02,783
When I go back to Hollywood,
I want you to come with me.

208
00:13:03,325 --> 00:13:06,109
Ned Flanders in Tinseltown?

209
00:13:25,848 --> 00:13:28,194
- Ned, I'm James L. Brooks.
- Oh, can I call you Jim?

210
00:13:28,725 --> 00:13:30,769
James L. Brooks is good.
How about some sponge cake?

211
00:13:31,270 --> 00:13:33,355
- Well, I can't see the harm.
- With a brandy glaze?

212
00:13:35,065 --> 00:13:36,421
No!

213
00:13:36,817 --> 00:13:38,391
Perhaps you'd like a football game.

214
00:13:38,819 --> 00:13:40,790
- We don't have a team.
- No!

215
00:13:43,991 --> 00:13:45,200
Hey, daddy baby.

216
00:13:45,576 --> 00:13:48,141
- We're movie producers now.
- And we're Jewish.

217
00:13:48,704 --> 00:13:49,757
Yay!

218
00:13:53,834 --> 00:13:56,399
Sara, I'm sorry.
But I can't move to Hollywood.

219
00:13:56,962 --> 00:13:59,412
Heck, even Dollywood's
too far out for me.

220
00:14:00,299 --> 00:14:02,645
Too many people
appreciating it ironically.

221
00:14:03,177 --> 00:14:07,347
Well, then I'm staying in Springfield
with you for good.

222
00:14:08,807 --> 00:14:11,987
Oh, forgive my language.
But, uh, I'm one happy camper.

223
00:14:20,360 --> 00:14:22,623
Dude,
what's it like kissing a movie star?

224
00:14:23,155 --> 00:14:25,126
What's it like kissing a woman?

225
00:14:31,246 --> 00:14:34,526
- What seems to be the problem, officer?
- Problem is I can't seem to get an agent.

226
00:14:34,958 --> 00:14:37,263
Ha. Could you give your girlfriend
my headshot?

227
00:14:37,794 --> 00:14:41,121
Uh, that's me as a greaser,
emperor of China, Eleanor Roosevelt...

228
00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:44,291
...very regal, and now just plain me
with an eye patch.

229
00:14:44,843 --> 00:14:46,157
I'll give it to my agent.

230
00:14:47,763 --> 00:14:48,972
I don't do TV.

231
00:14:50,140 --> 00:14:52,111
Sure is nice to be shopping
for a woman again.

232
00:14:52,601 --> 00:14:54,540
Last thing I bought for a lady
was a casket.

233
00:14:55,395 --> 00:14:58,106
Sir, would you ask your sweetheart
to sign her autograph for me?

234
00:14:58,690 --> 00:14:59,690
Well, of course...

235
00:14:59,942 --> 00:15:02,392
Wait a minute.
This is to adopt two of your kids.

236
00:15:03,195 --> 00:15:04,195
Oh, so it is.

237
00:15:04,488 --> 00:15:06,646
I've already dumped three
on Mia Farrow.

238
00:15:07,157 --> 00:15:08,252
Sucker.

239
00:15:08,951 --> 00:15:10,817
Look. It's celebrity boy toy,
Ned Flanders...

240
00:15:11,286 --> 00:15:12,819
...and his arm candy, Sara Sloane.

241
00:15:13,247 --> 00:15:15,958
Miss Sloane, how are you handling
the change from la-la land...

242
00:15:16,542 --> 00:15:17,542
...to blah-blah land?

243
00:15:17,751 --> 00:15:20,493
Lisa, Springfield isn't
a cultural wasteland.

244
00:15:21,088 --> 00:15:23,319
Part of Stroker Ace
was filmed at our airport.

245
00:15:24,049 --> 00:15:29,106
And, um... Oh, there's our ladies' book
club. Sara, you're welcome to come.

246
00:15:30,013 --> 00:15:31,066
Oh, I'd love to.

247
00:15:31,431 --> 00:15:32,558
Another scoop.

248
00:15:32,933 --> 00:15:35,790
Sara Sloane
to attend girl-on-girl book club.

249
00:15:36,395 --> 00:15:38,261
Ho-ho, Moe, you lovable loser.

250
00:15:38,730 --> 00:15:41,327
You just made yourself $5. Whoo-hoo!

251
00:15:41,900 --> 00:15:44,319
Today's book is Bridget
Jones's Diary.

252
00:15:44,862 --> 00:15:48,375
Now, let's go around the room
and analyze why we didn't read it.

253
00:15:49,074 --> 00:15:51,816
- Cramps.
- All my friends are dead.

254
00:15:52,411 --> 00:15:55,445
Well, then,
I guess it's time for margaritas.

255
00:15:56,415 --> 00:15:59,418
Well, I wish someone had read the book
since I did invite the author...

256
00:16:00,043 --> 00:16:02,129
- ...Helen Fielding.
- Oh, never mind.

257
00:16:02,629 --> 00:16:04,788
As long as they bought the book,
I'll get the money.

258
00:16:05,299 --> 00:16:07,749
Besides,
most Americans can't understand...

259
00:16:08,302 --> 00:16:10,272
...the sophisticated subtlety
of British humor.

260
00:16:10,762 --> 00:16:12,118
I bid you good day.

261
00:16:21,481 --> 00:16:23,932
Hop to it, honey.
If we get to the Pops concert early...

262
00:16:24,484 --> 00:16:26,935
...we can give up our seats
to some old people.

263
00:16:35,078 --> 00:16:37,237
Daddy, where do babies come from?

264
00:16:37,748 --> 00:16:40,970
Sweetie, that's not the kind of dress
you wear outdoors or indoors...

265
00:16:41,627 --> 00:16:43,128
...or in a dirty dream.

266
00:16:43,545 --> 00:16:44,671
Oh, loosen up, honey.

267
00:16:45,047 --> 00:16:47,309
This dress
just creates the illusion of nudity.

268
00:16:47,841 --> 00:16:50,073
Well, Siegfried and Roy
create a lot of illusions...

269
00:16:50,594 --> 00:16:52,514
...but I doubt
their girlfriends dress like that.

270
00:17:02,397 --> 00:17:03,419
She should be ashamed.

271
00:17:03,774 --> 00:17:06,193
That's disgusting.
Don't look, Seymour.

272
00:17:06,735 --> 00:17:08,966
- I'm a veteran, Mother.
- A veteran bed wetter.

273
00:17:09,488 --> 00:17:10,488
Mother.

274
00:17:11,031 --> 00:17:14,034
Sara, I hate to say it,
but your top's upstaging the Pops.

275
00:17:14,660 --> 00:17:17,329
Fine. I'll wear your stupid jacket.

276
00:17:37,683 --> 00:17:38,965
Sara, I love you, but...

277
00:17:39,351 --> 00:17:42,792
...I get the feeling you're just not a
Ned-head tonight. Is something wrong?

278
00:17:44,690 --> 00:17:45,850
Actually, there is something.

279
00:17:46,108 --> 00:17:48,673
The time we've spent together
has been wonderful...

280
00:17:49,236 --> 00:17:50,769
...but I want sex with you.

281
00:17:51,196 --> 00:17:55,847
Uh, well, that's, uh,
a mighty big kettle of, uh...

282
00:17:57,953 --> 00:18:00,111
...premarital, uh, doodly. Ha, ha.

283
00:18:00,622 --> 00:18:01,717
I knew you'd say that.

284
00:18:02,082 --> 00:18:03,292
I need a glass of wine.

285
00:18:08,046 --> 00:18:09,871
This is quite a dil-diddly-lemma.

286
00:18:10,340 --> 00:18:12,499
I better talk this over
with the big man.

287
00:18:13,010 --> 00:18:17,108
Homer, Sara wants us to have S-E-X.

288
00:18:17,890 --> 00:18:20,924
Stupid Flanders, I'm not giving you
any of my secret moves.

289
00:18:21,560 --> 00:18:22,947
Well, I'm not sure I wanna do it.

290
00:18:23,353 --> 00:18:26,242
I mean, who will buy the cow
when you get the milk for free?

291
00:18:26,857 --> 00:18:28,139
You know, the cow being me.

292
00:18:28,525 --> 00:18:31,163
Flanders, I'm always interested
in talking about free milk.

293
00:18:31,737 --> 00:18:34,041
And if there's cookies involved,
so much the better.

294
00:18:40,245 --> 00:18:41,413
Ned, look.

295
00:18:41,788 --> 00:18:44,572
I know I said I wanted this.
But I don't want you to do anything...

296
00:18:45,167 --> 00:18:47,544
- ...you're uncomfortable with.
- I consulted my Bible...

297
00:18:48,086 --> 00:18:50,203
...and found verses
supporting what you wanna do...

298
00:18:50,714 --> 00:18:52,074
...and a lot of verses against it.

299
00:18:59,056 --> 00:19:00,807
What does that one say, Ned?

300
00:19:01,266 --> 00:19:06,501
It says a man should make restitution
if he eats his neighbor's grain.

301
00:19:07,439 --> 00:19:08,795
And that's good enough for me.

302
00:19:16,949 --> 00:19:18,627
Whoa. Wow.

303
00:19:19,076 --> 00:19:21,192
That made me completely forget
about Bob Balaban.

304
00:19:22,913 --> 00:19:25,473
- That's what Maude used to say.
- A girl could get used to that.

305
00:19:25,958 --> 00:19:29,326
Well, and you will
right after the wedding.

306
00:19:30,003 --> 00:19:32,016
You wanna get married?

307
00:19:32,506 --> 00:19:34,372
Mm-hm. That's right.
I'm like Baskin-Robbins.

308
00:19:34,842 --> 00:19:37,292
You get one free taste,
then you gotta buy the scoop.

309
00:19:40,430 --> 00:19:43,798
Ned, I love you.
But I'm not ready to be tied down.

310
00:19:44,476 --> 00:19:47,072
I love you too. And I always will.
But unlike the Bible...

311
00:19:47,646 --> 00:19:51,087
...I guess this ain't gonna have
a happy ending. I'm sorry.

312
00:19:53,151 --> 00:19:56,154
Oh, darn the luck.
That sounds like the Lupus Fun Run.

313
00:19:58,866 --> 00:20:00,763
Ha, ha! Fight Lupus.

314
00:20:01,618 --> 00:20:04,507
Screen siren Sara Sloane
shocked Tinseltown last night...

315
00:20:05,122 --> 00:20:08,417
...with a midnight marriage to
Gosford Park megahunk, Bob Balaban.

316
00:20:10,294 --> 00:20:12,534
This was followed three hours later
by a quickie divorce.

317
00:20:12,921 --> 00:20:15,486
Ah. I bet we would have lasted
twice that long.

318
00:20:19,261 --> 00:20:22,295
Poor Ned, gardening away his misery.

319
00:20:22,931 --> 00:20:25,528
His answer's not at the bottom
of a hedge.

320
00:20:27,311 --> 00:20:31,012
Hey, Hollywood, call me.
My number's on the bench.

321
00:20:34,067 --> 00:20:35,194
It's the darnedest thing.

322
00:20:35,569 --> 00:20:37,467
Women love you
when you've dated a movie star.

323
00:20:37,946 --> 00:20:39,552
I'm very happy for you, Ned.

324
00:20:39,990 --> 00:20:41,012
Me too.

325
00:20:43,202 --> 00:20:46,236
Uh-oh. Here comes Helen Fielding.

326
00:21:03,555 --> 00:21:07,945
Jellyfish
I held you close.

327
00:21:09,019 --> 00:21:10,917
And told you I love you.

328
00:21:11,396 --> 00:21:15,640
But then
The ocean took you back.

329
00:21:16,443 --> 00:21:20,249
And now
I just hold goo.

330
00:21:20,989 --> 00:21:24,576
Jellyfish
I held you close.

331
00:21:25,285 --> 00:21:28,580
And said
Thatl love you.

332
00:21:29,248 --> 00:21:33,460
But then
The ocean took you back.

333
00:21:34,253 --> 00:21:37,912
My jelly
I'll miss you.

334
00:21:38,632 --> 00:21:40,311
For now.

335
00:21:40,759 --> 00:21:46,035
I just hold goo