1 00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:02,919 (theme music playing) 2 00:00:03,003 --> 00:00:06,506 CHORUS: ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 3 00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:18,852 (bell ringing) 4 00:00:23,565 --> 00:00:25,817 (whistle blows) 5 00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:31,239 (beeping) 6 00:00:35,702 --> 00:00:37,662 (playing the blues) 7 00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:00,435 (honking horn) 8 00:01:04,314 --> 00:01:06,066 D'oh! (screams) 9 00:01:06,149 --> 00:01:07,859 (tires screeching) 10 00:01:08,568 --> 00:01:10,111 (all grunting) 11 00:01:10,487 --> 00:01:11,905 Whoo! 12 00:01:22,415 --> 00:01:25,168 {\an8}ANNOUNCER: Are you sick of ordinary-shaped amusement parks? 13 00:01:25,877 --> 00:01:27,253 {\an8}Am I ever. 14 00:01:27,337 --> 00:01:31,633 {\an8}Then be the first family on your block to visit Blockoland, 15 00:01:32,008 --> 00:01:34,594 {\an8}the amusement park made entirely of Blocko brand 16 00:01:34,677 --> 00:01:36,346 {\an8}assembly fun blocks. 17 00:01:38,139 --> 00:01:41,559 {\an8}So, how much did you love Blockoland? 18 00:01:41,643 --> 00:01:43,228 {\an8}It was all right, I guess. 19 00:01:43,728 --> 00:01:47,065 {\an8}Kids... how would you like 20 00:01:47,148 --> 00:01:50,318 {\an8}to go to... Blockoland? 21 00:01:50,401 --> 00:01:51,528 {\an8}BOTH: Meh. 22 00:01:51,611 --> 00:01:53,655 {\an8}But the TV gave me the impression that... 23 00:01:53,738 --> 00:01:55,281 {\an8}We said, "meh." 24 00:01:55,365 --> 00:01:57,909 {\an8}M-E-H. Meh. (loud slurp) 25 00:01:57,992 --> 00:01:59,744 {\an8}Well, I'd like to go. 26 00:01:59,828 --> 00:02:01,371 {\an8}How about you, Maggie? 27 00:02:01,830 --> 00:02:02,664 (exclaims) 28 00:02:04,791 --> 00:02:05,708 (effort grunt) 29 00:02:06,501 --> 00:02:07,502 {\an8}-Oh. -Aw. 30 00:02:07,585 --> 00:02:08,711 {\an8}(chuckling) 31 00:02:09,087 --> 00:02:10,630 {\an8}(engine starting) 32 00:02:10,713 --> 00:02:12,257 {\an8}-(Santa's Little Helper barking) -Maggie, no! 33 00:02:12,340 --> 00:02:16,719 {\an8}-(vehicle rattling) -ALL: Ow! Ow! Ow! 34 00:02:16,803 --> 00:02:17,804 {\an8}HOMER: We're here. 35 00:02:20,640 --> 00:02:22,517 {\an8}(Block character squeaking) 36 00:02:23,184 --> 00:02:24,894 {\an8}Howdy, partner. (chuckles) 37 00:02:24,978 --> 00:02:27,772 {\an8}Four score and seven blocks ago, my-- Aah! 38 00:02:28,273 --> 00:02:30,441 -(both grunting) -(sighs) 39 00:02:31,234 --> 00:02:34,112 {\an8}Ow, ow, ow. 40 00:02:34,195 --> 00:02:35,488 {\an8}Whee! 41 00:02:38,658 --> 00:02:41,411 {\an8}OK, we have our choice of Rectangle Land 42 00:02:41,494 --> 00:02:43,705 {\an8}Cube Country, or Squaresville. 43 00:02:43,788 --> 00:02:46,082 {\an8}Squaresville sounds pretty cool. 44 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,626 {\an8}(chuckling) 45 00:02:48,710 --> 00:02:50,378 {\an8}(monotone voice) I am a robot. 46 00:02:50,461 --> 00:02:53,089 {\an8}Do what I say. (chuckling) 47 00:02:53,923 --> 00:02:56,009 {\an8}I am a washing machine. 48 00:02:56,092 --> 00:02:57,760 {\an8}Do what I say. 49 00:02:57,844 --> 00:02:58,803 {\an8}(chuckling) 50 00:02:58,887 --> 00:03:01,639 {\an8}(both grunting) 51 00:03:01,723 --> 00:03:04,017 {\an8}Take that! In the face! 52 00:03:07,812 --> 00:03:09,772 {\an8}You knocked his block off. 53 00:03:10,565 --> 00:03:11,482 {\an8}Come with me. 54 00:03:15,653 --> 00:03:16,946 {\an8}Check it out. 55 00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:19,073 {\an8}I built myself a healthy apple. 56 00:03:19,157 --> 00:03:21,201 {\an8}But you made it out of ham cubes. 57 00:03:21,284 --> 00:03:23,912 {\an8}Yep, a shiny new apple. 58 00:03:27,332 --> 00:03:28,541 {\an8}I get it. 59 00:03:28,625 --> 00:03:30,668 {\an8}Everything's made of blocks. 60 00:03:30,752 --> 00:03:32,045 {\an8}Even the water. 61 00:03:33,421 --> 00:03:35,381 {\an8}Hey. Ow. 62 00:03:35,465 --> 00:03:37,467 {\an8}Hey, Boat 28, stop splashing. 63 00:03:37,550 --> 00:03:39,010 {\an8}What are you going to do about it? 64 00:03:41,429 --> 00:03:42,472 {\an8}Uh-oh. 65 00:03:43,932 --> 00:03:45,308 {\an8}(sputtering) 66 00:03:46,643 --> 00:03:48,186 {\an8}(coughing) 67 00:03:49,520 --> 00:03:50,605 {\an8}Ah! Leeches. 68 00:03:50,688 --> 00:03:51,898 {\an8}(screaming) 69 00:03:54,025 --> 00:03:57,445 {\an8}Ow! Why did I get this Lego shirt? 70 00:03:57,904 --> 00:03:59,739 {\an8}Don't you mean Blocko shirt? 71 00:03:59,822 --> 00:04:02,325 {\an8}Right, right-- Blocko shirt. 72 00:04:02,784 --> 00:04:04,535 {\an8}Lisa, how's your Eiffel Tower kit? 73 00:04:04,619 --> 00:04:07,163 {\an8}It's OK, but it's missing a piece. 74 00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:09,290 {\an8}Welcome to real life, Lisa. 75 00:04:09,374 --> 00:04:13,461 {\an8}You can't fight City Hall, a.k.a. Blockoland, 76 00:04:13,544 --> 00:04:15,004 {\an8}so don't even try. 77 00:04:15,088 --> 00:04:17,882 {\an8}What kind of a thing is that to tell your children? 78 00:04:17,966 --> 00:04:19,717 It's what I always tell them. 79 00:04:19,801 --> 00:04:21,427 I told them that twice yesterday. 80 00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:23,554 And then again as they were going to sleep. 81 00:04:23,638 --> 00:04:27,225 {\an8}[scoffs] I'm sure the gift shop will replace the missing piece. 82 00:04:27,642 --> 00:04:28,685 {\an8}You're right, honey. 83 00:04:28,768 --> 00:04:30,144 Hear that, kids? 84 00:04:30,228 --> 00:04:33,273 The Simpsons are going to Blockoland. 85 00:04:33,356 --> 00:04:34,816 (all cheering) 86 00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:36,776 HOMER: Excuse me. 87 00:04:45,576 --> 00:04:47,954 You sold my little girl a shoddy Eiffel Tower. 88 00:04:48,037 --> 00:04:49,455 Hey, tough luck, pal. 89 00:04:49,539 --> 00:04:51,332 You can't fight the souvenir industry. 90 00:04:51,416 --> 00:04:52,375 We're too powerful. 91 00:04:52,458 --> 00:04:54,127 {\an8}Yeah, you're right. 92 00:04:57,422 --> 00:04:58,840 But before I go 93 00:04:58,923 --> 00:05:02,010 I'm going to give you a little souvenir of my own. 94 00:05:02,093 --> 00:05:03,094 (grunting) 95 00:05:06,055 --> 00:05:07,682 Aw, what the hey. 96 00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:09,684 Here you go. 97 00:05:09,767 --> 00:05:11,185 {\an8}Thank you, Dad. 98 00:05:11,269 --> 00:05:15,064 {\an8}Hey, any friend of Marge is a friend of mine. 99 00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:18,276 So, how's that new block I got you? 100 00:05:18,359 --> 00:05:19,319 Great. 101 00:05:19,694 --> 00:05:20,903 Ah. 102 00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:24,073 You know, standing up for the little guy felt good. 103 00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:25,533 I'm going to do it more often. 104 00:05:26,075 --> 00:05:27,160 (gasp) 105 00:05:27,702 --> 00:05:28,661 (impact grunts) 106 00:05:28,745 --> 00:05:29,829 (grunting) 107 00:05:29,912 --> 00:05:32,165 -(tires screeching, engine revving) -(Marge grunting) 108 00:05:33,374 --> 00:05:34,792 -WIGGUM: Scram! -LOU: (screams) 109 00:05:34,876 --> 00:05:36,169 Those bullies are gone now. 110 00:05:36,252 --> 00:05:37,378 You idiot. 111 00:05:37,462 --> 00:05:40,340 They were beating out my shirt fire. (grunts) 112 00:05:40,423 --> 00:05:43,009 My heart was in the right place, jerk. 113 00:05:44,594 --> 00:05:45,553 Hyah! 114 00:05:48,181 --> 00:05:49,724 Thanks again, Dad. 115 00:05:49,807 --> 00:05:51,934 Well, you're welcome, honey. 116 00:05:52,018 --> 00:05:54,103 Now I'm going to spend the whole day 117 00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:56,064 helping shmoes with their problems. 118 00:05:56,147 --> 00:05:57,482 You got a problem, Bart? 119 00:05:57,565 --> 00:06:00,026 A girl at school won't go to the dance with me. 120 00:06:00,109 --> 00:06:01,819 ♪ Bart's got a girlfriend ♪ 121 00:06:01,903 --> 00:06:03,863 {\an8}No I don't, that's the problem. 122 00:06:04,405 --> 00:06:06,407 ♪ Bart's got a problem. ♪ 123 00:06:06,491 --> 00:06:07,950 Don't worry, son. 124 00:06:08,034 --> 00:06:09,077 I'll handle this. 125 00:06:14,916 --> 00:06:15,792 Come on. 126 00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:17,543 Why won't you go out with Bart? 127 00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:20,463 He's a smelly, ugly dork. 128 00:06:20,546 --> 00:06:24,008 Please. Ugly is such a smelly word. 129 00:06:24,092 --> 00:06:25,760 Who would you rather go out with? 130 00:06:25,843 --> 00:06:27,053 Tommy. 131 00:06:29,263 --> 00:06:30,765 Well, duh. 132 00:06:30,848 --> 00:06:32,100 He's breathtaking 133 00:06:32,183 --> 00:06:34,310 but Bart has inner beauty 134 00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:35,853 like you'd find in a rodent. 135 00:06:39,107 --> 00:06:41,526 And face it, you're no prize, either. 136 00:06:41,609 --> 00:06:44,028 You wear braces, you dress like a kid 137 00:06:44,112 --> 00:06:45,488 and you're not getting any younger. 138 00:06:45,571 --> 00:06:47,031 Take what you can get. 139 00:06:47,115 --> 00:06:49,951 He's right. Grab something, and don't let go. 140 00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:53,246 Well, Bart's not so bad. 141 00:06:56,249 --> 00:07:00,128 Uh, they wouldn't honor my coupon for two free streaks. 142 00:07:00,211 --> 00:07:01,462 They wouldn't? 143 00:07:01,546 --> 00:07:03,297 Well, I'll go to bat for you, honey. 144 00:07:08,010 --> 00:07:09,303 {\an8}Yes, may I help you? 145 00:07:09,387 --> 00:07:11,097 {\an8}Nice place you got here. 146 00:07:11,180 --> 00:07:12,598 {\an8}Oh, look, a hair net. 147 00:07:12,682 --> 00:07:17,478 {\an8}Be a shame if it was hurled to the ground. 148 00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:18,688 (grunts) 149 00:07:20,314 --> 00:07:23,151 Oh, how clumsy of me. 150 00:07:23,234 --> 00:07:24,235 And... 151 00:07:25,486 --> 00:07:26,696 Oops. 152 00:07:26,779 --> 00:07:28,614 Why are you doing these things? 153 00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:30,324 Either you honor my wife's coupon 154 00:07:30,408 --> 00:07:32,243 or a lot more lids will be unscrewed. 155 00:07:32,326 --> 00:07:35,037 But I cannot streak that much hair. 156 00:07:35,121 --> 00:07:35,997 Think of the cost. 157 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:37,039 I'd be ruined. 158 00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:38,499 Oh, really. 159 00:07:40,209 --> 00:07:41,419 Boy, you weren't kidding. 160 00:07:41,502 --> 00:07:43,921 Your profit margins are razor-thin. 161 00:07:44,005 --> 00:07:45,298 You see? This is what I'm... 162 00:07:45,381 --> 00:07:46,799 Wait a minute. 163 00:07:46,883 --> 00:07:49,760 $400 a month for loafer lightener? 164 00:07:49,844 --> 00:07:51,345 But we must have it. 165 00:07:51,429 --> 00:07:53,264 It is the lifeblood of the industry. 166 00:07:55,725 --> 00:07:58,686 You get the same results with a mincing gel. 167 00:07:59,228 --> 00:08:00,521 But of course! 168 00:08:00,605 --> 00:08:02,982 I will save thousands. Thank you. 169 00:08:03,524 --> 00:08:05,443 Oh, Homie, I love them. 170 00:08:05,526 --> 00:08:07,153 I can't thank you enough. 171 00:08:07,236 --> 00:08:09,906 The satisfaction of helping another human being 172 00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:13,326 is all the thanks I et cetera. 173 00:08:15,036 --> 00:08:17,163 And I gave that man directions 174 00:08:17,246 --> 00:08:18,831 even though I didn't know the way 175 00:08:18,915 --> 00:08:22,460 'cause that's the kind of guy I am this week. 176 00:08:26,047 --> 00:08:28,090 Ah, lousy Isotopes. 177 00:08:28,174 --> 00:08:29,926 They're a disgrace to baseball. 178 00:08:30,009 --> 00:08:30,885 They lost again? 179 00:08:30,968 --> 00:08:31,802 Mm-hmm. 180 00:08:31,886 --> 00:08:33,679 The team's been terrible since they got bought 181 00:08:33,763 --> 00:08:36,557 by that cheap, heartless Duff Corporation. 182 00:08:36,641 --> 00:08:38,267 Hey, Moe, give me a Duff. 183 00:08:40,853 --> 00:08:43,356 Oh, yeah, sweet Duff. 184 00:08:43,439 --> 00:08:46,567 What a minute. Duff owns the Springfield Isotopes? 185 00:08:46,651 --> 00:08:47,568 Since when? 186 00:08:47,652 --> 00:08:49,612 They bought them a year ago from the Mafia. 187 00:08:49,695 --> 00:08:51,864 It was the last of the family-owned teams. 188 00:08:51,948 --> 00:08:53,658 I tried to return my season ticket 189 00:08:53,741 --> 00:08:55,368 but they wouldn't give me my money back. 190 00:08:55,451 --> 00:08:56,953 They said they wanted it. 191 00:08:57,036 --> 00:08:58,412 Say no more. 192 00:08:58,496 --> 00:08:59,664 I'll help you, Lenny. 193 00:08:59,747 --> 00:09:00,957 You want to help me? 194 00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:02,083 Oh, haven't you heard? 195 00:09:02,166 --> 00:09:03,084 He's the new Homer. 196 00:09:03,167 --> 00:09:04,877 He's wonderful. 197 00:09:10,841 --> 00:09:13,094 I'm trying to get a refund for this ticket. 198 00:09:13,177 --> 00:09:15,388 Is this the executive office of the ball club? 199 00:09:15,471 --> 00:09:17,056 Nope. This is the equipment shed. 200 00:09:17,139 --> 00:09:18,224 Oh. Well, is that it? 201 00:09:20,059 --> 00:09:21,936 That's where we keep the water heater. 202 00:09:22,019 --> 00:09:23,813 -Is... -That's a tractor. 203 00:09:23,896 --> 00:09:25,231 I see. 204 00:09:25,773 --> 00:09:27,149 MAN: Sir, we can't give your friend 205 00:09:27,233 --> 00:09:30,069 a refund just because the team is losing. 206 00:09:30,152 --> 00:09:32,655 I'm sorry to hear that. 207 00:09:33,614 --> 00:09:34,824 Spin that back to where it was. 208 00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:35,741 Yes, sir. 209 00:09:36,534 --> 00:09:37,702 This meeting is over. 210 00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:38,744 OK. 211 00:09:39,745 --> 00:09:41,789 So, uh, you want to go get something to eat? 212 00:09:41,872 --> 00:09:43,416 No, I don't. 213 00:09:44,208 --> 00:09:45,459 Get out of here. 214 00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:46,669 No, no, not that door. 215 00:09:46,752 --> 00:09:47,920 (gasps) 216 00:09:52,216 --> 00:09:54,969 "Albuquerque Isotopes?" 217 00:09:55,052 --> 00:09:56,596 What is all this stuff? 218 00:09:57,013 --> 00:09:58,347 It's not anything. 219 00:09:58,431 --> 00:09:59,515 It has no purpose. 220 00:10:02,018 --> 00:10:03,811 What a crazy room. 221 00:10:03,894 --> 00:10:05,563 There's no Albuquerque Isotopes. 222 00:10:05,646 --> 00:10:08,524 It's the Springfield... Oh. 223 00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:09,984 No, no, there's no "oh." 224 00:10:10,067 --> 00:10:13,029 You're moving the team to Albuquerque, aren't you? 225 00:10:13,112 --> 00:10:15,364 No, no, we would never abandon 226 00:10:15,448 --> 00:10:17,533 our loyal Springfield fans. 227 00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:20,494 By the way, all this barging into rooms marked "Private" 228 00:10:20,578 --> 00:10:22,371 must have made you thirsty. 229 00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:24,457 -Would you like a beer? -Well, OK. 230 00:10:24,540 --> 00:10:26,500 But you can't silence Homer Simpson. 231 00:10:26,584 --> 00:10:28,336 I'm the friend of the downtrodden 232 00:10:28,419 --> 00:10:30,796 and I'm not going to forget what I saw here today. 233 00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,214 Of course not. 234 00:10:32,298 --> 00:10:34,925 -(buzzing) -Duffman, could you bring in two bottles 235 00:10:35,009 --> 00:10:37,428 of smooth, untainted Duff? 236 00:10:37,511 --> 00:10:39,055 DUFFMAN: Oh, yeah! 237 00:10:39,138 --> 00:10:41,891 (Baritone voice) ♪ Oh, yeah! ♪ 238 00:10:41,974 --> 00:10:44,393 Now, Homer, we've developed this additive 239 00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:47,563 that makes beer super, super malty. 240 00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:48,564 Care to try it? 241 00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:49,482 Wait a minute. 242 00:10:49,565 --> 00:10:51,025 {\an8}Will this erase my memory? 243 00:10:51,108 --> 00:10:53,194 No, not at all. 244 00:10:59,283 --> 00:11:00,785 Man, that is malty. 245 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:02,411 But he'll never know. 246 00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:04,413 (evil laughter) 247 00:11:09,543 --> 00:11:13,631 -Good grief. -(whining) Ow, my head! 248 00:11:13,714 --> 00:11:15,257 How long have I been out here? 249 00:11:15,341 --> 00:11:17,176 All night. You were yelling at the swing. 250 00:11:17,259 --> 00:11:18,386 I was? 251 00:11:18,844 --> 00:11:20,304 But I love the swing. 252 00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:22,014 Dad, you were nuts. 253 00:11:22,098 --> 00:11:25,267 You know me, occasionally I'll be quirky. 254 00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:27,520 I'll-be-quirky... 255 00:11:27,895 --> 00:11:28,979 Albuquerque! 256 00:11:29,063 --> 00:11:30,314 I'll be right back. 257 00:11:32,650 --> 00:11:33,734 Members of the media 258 00:11:33,818 --> 00:11:34,860 thank you for coming. 259 00:11:34,944 --> 00:11:37,446 The proof that the Isotopes are moving to Albuquerque 260 00:11:37,530 --> 00:11:39,824 is right behind this door. 261 00:11:39,907 --> 00:11:40,825 MAN: Excuse me. 262 00:11:40,908 --> 00:11:43,244 Joel Duffman, the Newsly Times. 263 00:11:43,327 --> 00:11:44,870 What's with the smear campaign 264 00:11:44,954 --> 00:11:46,872 against this beloved brewer? 265 00:11:47,957 --> 00:11:51,001 And weren't you once in a loony bin? 266 00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:52,712 Oh, yeah! 267 00:11:52,795 --> 00:11:53,963 He's right, folks. 268 00:11:54,046 --> 00:11:58,050 The only story here is the rich, smooth taste of Duff. 269 00:11:58,134 --> 00:12:00,177 Yes, that is an important story. 270 00:12:00,261 --> 00:12:01,846 But so is this! 271 00:12:03,973 --> 00:12:05,224 (trumpet playing) 272 00:12:05,307 --> 00:12:07,893 Well, I think I know tomorrow's headline, 273 00:12:07,977 --> 00:12:09,603 "Local Man Is Liar." 274 00:12:09,687 --> 00:12:10,813 That is a good headline. 275 00:12:14,608 --> 00:12:16,736 BROCKMAN: So let me get this straight, Mr. Duff, 276 00:12:16,819 --> 00:12:19,405 the Isotopes are not moving to Albuquerque? 277 00:12:19,488 --> 00:12:20,698 Absolutely not. 278 00:12:20,781 --> 00:12:23,909 So, are you calling Homer Simpson a liar? 279 00:12:23,993 --> 00:12:26,120 Well, we have obtained this footage of him 280 00:12:26,203 --> 00:12:27,830 with his pants on fire. 281 00:12:27,913 --> 00:12:30,583 {\an8}(screaming) Oh, no! 282 00:12:30,666 --> 00:12:33,127 Well, Homie, I believe you're telling the truth 283 00:12:33,210 --> 00:12:34,670 about the Isotopes. 284 00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,380 I don't mind being called a liar 285 00:12:36,464 --> 00:12:38,716 when I'm lying, or about to lie 286 00:12:38,799 --> 00:12:40,259 or just finished lying. 287 00:12:40,676 --> 00:12:44,680 But not when I'm telling the truth! 288 00:12:44,764 --> 00:12:46,348 Yeah, but what can you do? 289 00:12:46,432 --> 00:12:49,477 There's all kinds of ways to get the public on your side. 290 00:12:49,560 --> 00:12:51,145 Bob Dylan wrote songs. 291 00:12:51,228 --> 00:12:53,647 Cesar Chavez staged hunger strikes. 292 00:12:53,731 --> 00:12:54,690 That's it. 293 00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:56,776 I'll go on a hunger strike. 294 00:12:56,859 --> 00:13:00,404 Oh, Homie, you couldn't keep up a hunger strike. 295 00:13:00,488 --> 00:13:02,281 You eat while you brush your teeth. 296 00:13:02,364 --> 00:13:04,450 You're eating a huge sausage right now. 297 00:13:05,659 --> 00:13:06,494 So? 298 00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:08,204 I can stop. 299 00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:09,330 And I will stop. 300 00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:13,834 I am on a hunger strike starting right... now. 301 00:13:16,545 --> 00:13:18,839 (whimpering) 302 00:13:22,885 --> 00:13:25,262 Mmm! Mmm! 303 00:13:25,346 --> 00:13:27,598 (sucking noises) 304 00:13:35,773 --> 00:13:38,442 Let's see those double-A baseball honchos ignore this. 305 00:13:38,526 --> 00:13:40,486 You're really not going to eat anything? 306 00:13:40,569 --> 00:13:42,571 My hunger strike will not end 307 00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:44,907 until Duff admits they're moving the team. 308 00:13:44,990 --> 00:13:46,283 Bart, my chains. 309 00:13:47,952 --> 00:13:49,119 Mm-mmm. 310 00:13:49,203 --> 00:13:50,496 Mm. Mm. 311 00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:52,164 Now it begins. 312 00:13:52,248 --> 00:13:53,582 Dad, I'm so proud of you. 313 00:13:53,666 --> 00:13:55,334 {\an8}If you need some inspiration 314 00:13:55,417 --> 00:13:58,045 {\an8}here's a book of Mike Farrell's core beliefs. 315 00:13:59,964 --> 00:14:01,215 (mumbling) 316 00:14:01,298 --> 00:14:04,051 Man, he really hates Wayne Rogers. 317 00:14:05,719 --> 00:14:06,971 Goodbye, Homie. 318 00:14:07,054 --> 00:14:09,723 Here's Dr. Hibbert's number if you feel weak. 319 00:14:09,807 --> 00:14:13,811 Don't worry, Duff's not going to let me waste away to nothing. 320 00:14:13,894 --> 00:14:15,187 Uh, Dad... 321 00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:18,524 D'oh... 322 00:14:20,609 --> 00:14:21,861 What a great ball game. 323 00:14:21,944 --> 00:14:23,571 Thanks, Weekend Dad. 324 00:14:23,654 --> 00:14:25,072 Stop calling me that. 325 00:14:25,155 --> 00:14:26,198 Hey, kid and man! 326 00:14:26,282 --> 00:14:28,951 Don't support a team run by liars! 327 00:14:29,034 --> 00:14:29,952 Liars? 328 00:14:30,035 --> 00:14:31,495 They're secretly planning 329 00:14:31,579 --> 00:14:32,496 to move to Albuquerque. 330 00:14:32,580 --> 00:14:33,706 That's crazy! 331 00:14:33,789 --> 00:14:35,583 It would've been on a talk radio show 332 00:14:35,666 --> 00:14:39,169 like Sports Chat or Sportszilla and the Jabber Jocks. 333 00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:42,339 -Yeah! -Why you little... (yells) 334 00:14:44,842 --> 00:14:46,677 Oh, so hungry... 335 00:14:47,219 --> 00:14:48,220 Can't give up... 336 00:14:48,304 --> 00:14:50,764 must continue fighting evil corporation... 337 00:14:52,850 --> 00:14:55,686 Oh, Seymour, you shouldn't have! 338 00:14:55,769 --> 00:14:57,605 It's going to go straight to my thighs. 339 00:14:57,688 --> 00:15:00,024 Well, Edna, it just might have some company. 340 00:15:00,107 --> 00:15:02,610 Oh... Seymour! 341 00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:06,196 (startled grunt) 342 00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:08,449 Nice try, God. 343 00:15:09,199 --> 00:15:11,076 But Homer Simpson doesn't give in 344 00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:13,537 to temptation that easily... hey! 345 00:15:13,621 --> 00:15:15,039 (slurping) 346 00:15:15,122 --> 00:15:16,498 Stop that! 347 00:15:16,582 --> 00:15:18,125 (all eating) 348 00:15:20,878 --> 00:15:21,921 (sighs) 349 00:15:22,004 --> 00:15:23,756 There's still more meatloaf. 350 00:15:23,839 --> 00:15:25,883 Oh, that's impossible. 351 00:15:25,966 --> 00:15:28,135 Come on, come on, we all have to pitch in 352 00:15:28,218 --> 00:15:29,428 and eat your father's share. 353 00:15:29,511 --> 00:15:32,014 Uh, why don't you just cook less? 354 00:15:32,097 --> 00:15:34,224 I don't do things that way, Lisa. 355 00:15:34,308 --> 00:15:37,895 ♪ Dancing away my hunger pangs ♪ 356 00:15:37,978 --> 00:15:41,607 ♪ Moving my feet so my stomach won't hurt ♪ 357 00:15:41,690 --> 00:15:44,068 ♪ I'm kind of like Jesus ♪ 358 00:15:44,151 --> 00:15:47,529 ♪ But not in a sacrilegious way ♪ 359 00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:49,865 Geez, Homer's losing it already. 360 00:15:49,949 --> 00:15:51,492 Yeah, but his weary shuffling 361 00:15:51,575 --> 00:15:52,826 makes my heart smile. 362 00:15:52,910 --> 00:15:55,037 (moans) 363 00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:57,873 I'm so hungry. 364 00:15:57,957 --> 00:15:58,958 (rumbling) 365 00:15:59,041 --> 00:16:01,168 {\an8}His tummy sounds angry, Daddy. 366 00:16:01,251 --> 00:16:03,671 Yeah, that's his stomach eating itself. 367 00:16:04,505 --> 00:16:06,382 It's such a beautiful day. 368 00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:07,758 Where are the crowds? 369 00:16:07,841 --> 00:16:09,385 Duffman is thrusting 370 00:16:09,468 --> 00:16:11,136 in the direction of the problem. 371 00:16:13,472 --> 00:16:17,685 Hmm, people seem to be drawn to that kook. 372 00:16:17,768 --> 00:16:19,687 Maybe we can exploit him. 373 00:16:19,770 --> 00:16:20,938 It's too dangerous, sir. 374 00:16:21,021 --> 00:16:22,314 He knows about Albuquerque. 375 00:16:22,398 --> 00:16:24,525 Duffman is a cautious cat. 376 00:16:24,608 --> 00:16:27,319 No, listen, fans love wackos. 377 00:16:27,403 --> 00:16:28,904 Remember that busty woman 378 00:16:28,988 --> 00:16:32,032 who ran out on the field and farted at the ballplayers? 379 00:16:32,574 --> 00:16:35,327 I think we've found our newest attraction. 380 00:16:35,411 --> 00:16:38,497 Duffman has a bad feeling about this. 381 00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:39,748 Can it, Sid. 382 00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:41,417 (normal voice) Why don't you can it, Howard? 383 00:16:42,292 --> 00:16:43,335 (snoring) 384 00:16:53,470 --> 00:16:56,015 Uh? Wha...? What's going on? 385 00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:57,433 What am I doing here? 386 00:16:57,516 --> 00:16:58,434 Order of Mr. Duff. 387 00:16:58,517 --> 00:16:59,518 And word to the wise, 388 00:16:59,601 --> 00:17:00,894 If someone hits a home run 389 00:17:00,978 --> 00:17:02,938 the fireworks come out here and here. 390 00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:03,856 (bat cracks) 391 00:17:03,939 --> 00:17:04,773 (crowd cheering) 392 00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:05,858 Got to go! 393 00:17:08,444 --> 00:17:09,778 (organ fanfare plays) 394 00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:11,030 ANNOUNCER (over PA): Folks, it's time to meet 395 00:17:11,113 --> 00:17:12,948 a real super-fan 396 00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:15,826 Hungry Hungry Homer. 397 00:17:15,909 --> 00:17:17,077 He's on a hunger strike 398 00:17:17,161 --> 00:17:19,830 till the 'Topes win the pennant! 399 00:17:19,913 --> 00:17:21,582 (cheering) 400 00:17:21,665 --> 00:17:23,917 What? That's not why I'm here! 401 00:17:24,001 --> 00:17:27,296 {\an8}(distant) They're moving the team to Albuquerque! 402 00:17:27,379 --> 00:17:28,797 Hear that, folks? 403 00:17:28,881 --> 00:17:31,175 He said, "Go, 'Topes!" 404 00:17:31,258 --> 00:17:32,801 (cheering) 405 00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:35,721 Oh, all this hunger for nothing. 406 00:17:35,804 --> 00:17:36,764 Get your hot dogs! 407 00:17:36,847 --> 00:17:38,182 Fat, juicy hot dogs! 408 00:17:38,265 --> 00:17:40,100 Pork chops and apple sauce! 409 00:17:40,184 --> 00:17:41,143 Peking duck! 410 00:17:41,226 --> 00:17:43,437 Get your crispy Peking duck! 411 00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:44,855 Yeah, Duck Man, over here! 412 00:17:44,938 --> 00:17:46,315 (sizzles) 413 00:17:46,648 --> 00:17:47,900 Mmm! 414 00:17:47,983 --> 00:17:48,901 (smacking) 415 00:17:48,984 --> 00:17:50,194 Mmm! 416 00:17:50,819 --> 00:17:51,987 (smacking and slurping) 417 00:17:54,490 --> 00:17:56,408 Do they have to chew so loud? 418 00:17:58,786 --> 00:18:00,954 Oh... I'm wasting away... 419 00:18:01,371 --> 00:18:03,540 Oh, I'm down to a B-cup. 420 00:18:03,999 --> 00:18:05,834 It's been a whole week! 421 00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:07,753 Why are you letting my husband die? 422 00:18:07,836 --> 00:18:09,922 What does that have to do with baseball? 423 00:18:10,005 --> 00:18:11,715 Death is a part of baseball. 424 00:18:11,799 --> 00:18:12,800 Oh, yeah, the main part. 425 00:18:12,883 --> 00:18:14,301 Guys... 426 00:18:14,384 --> 00:18:17,429 Uh, we won't let any harm come to your husband, Mrs. Simpson. 427 00:18:17,513 --> 00:18:18,514 He'll be fine. 428 00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:20,099 He's not moving. 429 00:18:20,182 --> 00:18:21,767 (flies buzzing) 430 00:18:21,850 --> 00:18:23,143 He's probably resting 431 00:18:23,227 --> 00:18:25,562 from all the moving he did before you got here. 432 00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:28,315 He'll start moving in a second, I'm sure of it. 433 00:18:28,398 --> 00:18:29,942 Turn on the sprinklers. 434 00:18:30,025 --> 00:18:33,153 (slow groaning) 435 00:18:33,237 --> 00:18:35,322 You see there? He's fine. 436 00:18:35,405 --> 00:18:36,615 Oh, look at him go! 437 00:18:36,698 --> 00:18:37,950 (growls) 438 00:18:40,035 --> 00:18:42,121 Oh, I'm so hungry. 439 00:18:42,746 --> 00:18:44,832 Oh, why keep starving myself? 440 00:18:44,915 --> 00:18:46,208 No one cares. 441 00:18:46,291 --> 00:18:50,129 Mm? (moan) 442 00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:53,924 -Who are you? -The spirit of Cesar Chavez. 443 00:18:54,007 --> 00:18:55,968 Why do you look like Cesar Romero? 444 00:18:56,051 --> 00:18:58,178 Because you don't know what Cesar Chavez looks like. 445 00:18:58,262 --> 00:18:59,429 Why are you here? 446 00:18:59,513 --> 00:19:01,473 To tell you not to give up. 447 00:19:01,557 --> 00:19:03,142 Oh, but I want to... 448 00:19:03,225 --> 00:19:04,935 He's talking to himself, sir. 449 00:19:05,018 --> 00:19:07,354 And his smell is distracting the center fielder. 450 00:19:08,021 --> 00:19:10,232 Yeah, this is getting sad. 451 00:19:10,315 --> 00:19:11,358 Let's bring him in. 452 00:19:11,441 --> 00:19:12,651 (snoring) 453 00:19:12,734 --> 00:19:15,028 OK, Skinny, on your feet. 454 00:19:15,112 --> 00:19:16,280 What's happening? 455 00:19:16,363 --> 00:19:18,240 Did I crush your corporation? 456 00:19:18,323 --> 00:19:19,908 No, you're being replaced. 457 00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:23,036 -(moans) -(crowd booing) 458 00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:26,582 And now, taking over for Hungry Hungry Homer... 459 00:19:26,665 --> 00:19:30,377 let's welcome Paint-Drinking Pete! 460 00:19:31,044 --> 00:19:32,963 (gulping) 461 00:19:33,046 --> 00:19:34,715 (crowd cheering) 462 00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:37,926 (Homer groaning) 463 00:19:39,344 --> 00:19:41,972 Well, Homer, your hunger strike lasted 464 00:19:42,055 --> 00:19:44,141 12 amazing days. 465 00:19:44,224 --> 00:19:46,435 {\an8}(weakly) Oh, me so hungee. 466 00:19:46,518 --> 00:19:49,271 Of course you are, Hungry Hungry Homer. 467 00:19:49,354 --> 00:19:51,773 So why not break your fast with our brand-new 468 00:19:51,857 --> 00:19:54,193 Isotope Dog Supreme? 469 00:19:54,276 --> 00:19:55,861 (sniffs) (shuddering) 470 00:19:55,944 --> 00:19:58,530 Oh, so hard to resist... 471 00:19:58,614 --> 00:20:01,450 mesquite-grilled onions... 472 00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:03,577 jalapeno relish... 473 00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:07,539 Wait a minute, those are Southwestern ingredients! 474 00:20:07,623 --> 00:20:09,208 (puzzled murmurs) 475 00:20:09,291 --> 00:20:12,127 Mango-lime salsa? 476 00:20:12,544 --> 00:20:15,505 That's the kind of bold flavor they enjoy in... 477 00:20:15,589 --> 00:20:17,132 Albuquerque! 478 00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:18,050 (all gasping) 479 00:20:18,133 --> 00:20:19,343 He's right! 480 00:20:19,426 --> 00:20:20,761 Yeah, and the wrapper says 481 00:20:20,844 --> 00:20:22,679 "Albuquerque Isotopes"! 482 00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:24,014 Homer was right! 483 00:20:24,097 --> 00:20:26,308 They're planning to move the team! 484 00:20:26,391 --> 00:20:28,268 (angry clamoring) 485 00:20:28,769 --> 00:20:30,270 Now, now, now, now, see here, people 486 00:20:30,354 --> 00:20:31,605 let's not be too hasty. 487 00:20:31,688 --> 00:20:33,523 Tell the truth! Come on, everybody... 488 00:20:33,607 --> 00:20:36,318 (chanting) Tell the truth! Tell the truth! 489 00:20:36,401 --> 00:20:38,028 Get him out of here. 490 00:20:38,111 --> 00:20:39,905 Don't listen to him, Duffman. 491 00:20:39,988 --> 00:20:43,033 For once in your life, stand up for the little guy! 492 00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:47,788 New feelings brewing in Duffman. 493 00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:50,290 What... would Jesus do? 494 00:20:50,832 --> 00:20:51,708 (surprised grunt) 495 00:20:54,211 --> 00:20:55,254 (yelling) 496 00:20:55,337 --> 00:20:57,464 (all cheering) 497 00:20:57,547 --> 00:20:58,966 Oh, yeah! 498 00:20:59,049 --> 00:21:00,926 (cheering) 499 00:21:01,009 --> 00:21:03,095 (chanting) Eat! Eat! Eat! 500 00:21:05,764 --> 00:21:07,557 (gulps) (sighs) 501 00:21:07,641 --> 00:21:10,185 The truth never tasted so good. 502 00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:12,104 (cheering) 503 00:21:12,187 --> 00:21:13,730 Way to go, Slim! 504 00:21:13,814 --> 00:21:16,024 (gulping) 505 00:21:21,029 --> 00:21:23,532 Damn, that town's got too much spirit. 506 00:21:23,615 --> 00:21:26,451 {\an8}Looks like we'll have to steal some other baseball team. 507 00:21:26,535 --> 00:21:28,453 {\an8}See what Dallas wants for the Cowboys. 508 00:21:28,537 --> 00:21:30,580 {\an8}Uh, that's a football team, sir. 509 00:21:30,664 --> 00:21:33,000 {\an8}They'll play what I tell them to play... 510 00:21:34,167 --> 00:21:37,754 for I am the Mayor of Albuquerque. 511 00:21:44,136 --> 00:21:47,097 (closing theme music) 512 00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:25,594 Shh! 513 00:22:29,056 --> 00:22:31,058 {\an8}Captioned by Visual Data Media Services