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(theme music playing)
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CHORUS: ♪ The Simpsons ♪
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(bell ringing)
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(whistle blows)
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(beeping)
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(playing the blues)
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(jazzy solo)
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(chimes)
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(tires screeching)
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(honking horn)
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D'oh!
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(screaming)
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(tires screeching)
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-(screaming)
-(laughing)
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-(Homer snoring)
-MARGE: Homer, get up!
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{\an8}Up! Up! Up!
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{\an8}(mumbles, continues snoring)
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-(mumbling, grunting)
-(bones cracking)
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-(gasps) Oh, no!
-(muffled shout)
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(groans)
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{\an8}What the--
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{\an8}-My juice box! Ohh!
-Oh, sorry, Homie.
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{\an8}But you promised to take me
to the Apron Expo today.
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{\an8}-Just give me 10 more hours.
-Come on.
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{\an8}You and the kids always
want to do fun stuff.
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{\an8}But today
we're doing something I like.
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{\an8}(groans)
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{\an8}They're unveiling
a combination apron-smock.
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-It's called a "smapron."
-Did you say "smockron"?
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{\an8}-No, smapron.
-Oh.
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{\an8}-(snoring)
-Come on. It'll be fun!
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{\an8}Man, that was a good Apron Expo!
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{\an8}I'm gonna wear my apron
on the Fourth of July.
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{\an8}And this lead apron
will keep me safe downstairs.
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{\an8}(chuckles) "Grrrl Power."
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{\an8}Eh, I'm a little disappointed.
There were too many aprons.
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{\an8}It was great, all right.
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{\an8}But all I want to do right now
is hit the adjustable sack
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{\an8}with a good juice box.
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{\an8}Because when all is said
and done--
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"Prison Rodeo...
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today"!
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{\an8}WARDEN (on P.A.): Welcome
to Waterville State Penitentiary.
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{\an8}The contestants you'll see
today are actual prisoners
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{\an8}on a break from their
telemarketing duties.
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{\an8}Now, here comes
our first outlaw!
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{\an8}-(bell rings)
-Yee-haw! (groans)
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{\an8}-(all gasp)
-Doggy.
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00:03:02,056 --> 00:03:04,017
{\an8}Well, don't feel too bad
for him, folks.
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{\an8}He's in here for erecting
a nativity scene
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{\an8}on city property.
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{\an8}(all boo)
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{\an8}There's so much evil
in the world.
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{\an8}-(crowd cheering)
-(calf lowing)
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WARDEN: No, Delbert.
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We're not
slaughtering the animals.
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It's not like that, Warden.
We was just havin' a conversation.
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-Ain't that right?
-Mm-hmm.
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{\an8}WARDEN:
Next up's a real lowlife.
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{\an8}Bob Dylan wrote a song
to keep him in prison.
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{\an8}-(bull grunting)
-Say hello to Jack Crowley.
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-(bellowing)
-Yee-haw!
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Go, bull! Toss his salad!
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-(groans)
-(cheering)
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{\an8}Oh, he's down!
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And it looks like old Tornado
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wants to caramelize
his creme brulee!
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-Yeah, do that!
-Somebody help him!
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Relax, they got rodeo clowns.
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Is my lipstick even?
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Go like this. (popping)
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MARGE: Hey! Hey, over here!
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Here, bully, bully,
bully, bully, bully!
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That's not gonna do it, Marge.
You need something red.
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Whoa!
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00:04:06,829 --> 00:04:08,539
Hey, Toro!
Here's something to gore!
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(bull bellowing)
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-Dad!
-Not now, honey. Daddy's busy.
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(bellowing)
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-(snorting)
-Now for a little calming blue.
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-Hey, where's your blue shirt?
-I don't have a blue shirt.
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Yow!
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-(shouts, groans)
-What the-- (grunting)
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(all screaming)
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{\an8}Maybe it's the tear gas.
(sniffles)
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O-- Or maybe this was
the best damn prison rodeo ever.
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(man groaning softly)
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How's your back, Homie?
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I can't complain.
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Nah, that's for the prisoners.
You can complain all you want.
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00:04:54,127 --> 00:04:58,423
Oh, God, my back!
It hurts so much!
92
00:04:58,506 --> 00:05:01,592
And my job is so unfulfilling!
93
00:05:01,676 --> 00:05:04,012
Try to focus on something else.
94
00:05:04,095 --> 00:05:06,723
Mmm, you like Jimi Hendrix,
right?
95
00:05:06,806 --> 00:05:09,475
-Uh-huh.
-Well, look at that painting.
96
00:05:09,559 --> 00:05:13,354
Wow, the artist really captured
Jimi's passion and intensity.
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HOMER:
And his fondness for the guitar.
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00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:18,192
Thank you kindly, ma'am.
They won't give us art supplies
99
00:05:18,276 --> 00:05:19,986
so I had to paint it with pudding.
100
00:05:20,778 --> 00:05:23,489
-A convict painted that?
-Yep.
101
00:05:23,573 --> 00:05:27,076
Well, I studied art,
and this guy's got a real gift.
102
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:29,287
You kiddin'? Look.
103
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He painted a unicorn
in outer space.
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I'm asking you.
What's it breathing?
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-Air.
-Ain't no air in space.
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There's an Air in Space Museum.
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-(bones cracking)
-Oh, God! My back!
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Let's get out of this
gosh-forsaken heck-hole.
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(groaning) All right.
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MARGE:
Oh, what a waste of talent.
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(gasps)
112
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A sunset.
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(wind whistling)
114
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(sighs)
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(sighs)
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(groaning)
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(grunting)
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They are coming back for us,
aren't they?
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I don't know.
120
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(grunting continues)
121
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(groaning)
122
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-How's your back, Dad?
-Well, there's a dull ache certainly.
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And overlaid on that
is a club sandwich of pain.
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Only instead of bacon there's agony.
125
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Marge, can I have a BLT?
126
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What are you looking at?
127
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Oh, nothing.
128
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How would you feel if I did
some volunteer work at the prison?
129
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First, I'd feel like having a BLT--
then proud of you.
130
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Oh, Homie, I knew you'd support me.
131
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(blows a kiss)
132
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-(cracking)
-Oh, my back!
133
00:07:01,170 --> 00:07:02,213
Hmm?
134
00:07:02,296 --> 00:07:05,967
Mrs. Marge Simpson.
I'm here to teach an art class.
135
00:07:06,050 --> 00:07:07,969
Ooh, art class.
136
00:07:08,052 --> 00:07:10,346
La-di-da.
137
00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:12,223
(buzzer buzzes)
138
00:07:12,849 --> 00:07:15,184
This is Ike Pross.
He's going to solitary.
139
00:07:15,268 --> 00:07:17,728
Ooh, solitary.
140
00:07:17,812 --> 00:07:20,022
-La-di-da.
-(buzzer buzzes)
141
00:07:20,690 --> 00:07:23,568
Welcome to
"Freeing the Artist Within."
142
00:07:23,651 --> 00:07:26,154
Not literally, of course.
(giggling)
143
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(gun cocks)
144
00:07:28,072 --> 00:07:31,325
OK. Now, I wanted to paint fresh fruit.
145
00:07:31,409 --> 00:07:35,204
But the prison cafeteria
would only give me sauerkraut.
146
00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:38,332
-(inmates groaning)
-That's depressing.
147
00:07:38,416 --> 00:07:40,334
Let's let a little sunshine in.
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(inmates groaning)
149
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:46,799
-(groans) Question?
-Can I smell your dress?
150
00:07:46,883 --> 00:07:48,676
(all laugh)
151
00:07:48,759 --> 00:07:50,970
Hey, you show some respect.
152
00:07:51,053 --> 00:07:53,764
-This one here's not for smellin'.
-(grunts)
153
00:07:53,848 --> 00:07:58,978
-Why thank you, Jack.
-No problem. Now, let's paint.
154
00:07:59,061 --> 00:08:00,396
Hey, can I smell your clothes?
155
00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:05,485
(whistles) Your spine is more twisted
than Sinbad's take on marriage.
156
00:08:05,568 --> 00:08:09,655
-(laughing)
-So? Just give me some drugs and surgery.
157
00:08:09,739 --> 00:08:11,657
Oh, I'd love to. But to be honest...
158
00:08:11,741 --> 00:08:15,870
modern medicine has a lousy record
of treating the back.
159
00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:17,914
We spend too much time on the front.
160
00:08:17,997 --> 00:08:20,541
Yeah, there's some neat stuff
on the front.
161
00:08:20,625 --> 00:08:22,335
I'm gonna send you
to my chiropractor.
162
00:08:22,418 --> 00:08:26,214
Hey, I thought real doctors
hated chiropractors.
163
00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:27,715
Well, that is our official stance.
164
00:08:27,798 --> 00:08:31,260
But between you, me and my golf clubs,
they're miracle workers.
165
00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:34,430
(grunting)
166
00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:37,016
That's charming, Sardonicus.
167
00:08:37,099 --> 00:08:39,685
But try to use less
of a stabbing action
168
00:08:39,769 --> 00:08:42,563
and more of a brushing stroke.
169
00:08:42,647 --> 00:08:45,483
Yeah. See how much
better that feels?
170
00:08:45,566 --> 00:08:48,319
Yes. Much better.
171
00:08:48,903 --> 00:08:52,114
Oh, Jack. That's so soulful.
172
00:08:52,907 --> 00:08:55,618
How did someone
so sensitive end up here?
173
00:08:55,701 --> 00:09:00,540
Well, if you really gotta know,
I shot a guy named Apu.
174
00:09:00,623 --> 00:09:01,791
Oh.
175
00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:06,170
Well, you know,
lots of people shoot Apu.
176
00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:08,589
It's just a hundred-dollar fine now.
177
00:09:08,673 --> 00:09:11,050
Maybe I belong in here.
I got a lotta anger.
178
00:09:11,133 --> 00:09:16,847
I don't see any anger.
I see a yearning for freedom.
179
00:09:16,931 --> 00:09:18,933
Um, do you have a title?
180
00:09:19,016 --> 00:09:20,643
"A Time to Kill."
181
00:09:21,435 --> 00:09:23,271
Titles are hard.
182
00:09:25,940 --> 00:09:29,277
Hello, Homer. I'm Dr. Steve.
Please lie down.
183
00:09:30,695 --> 00:09:33,739
Mmm. (snoring)
184
00:09:34,156 --> 00:09:36,284
Get-- Wake up, Homer!
185
00:09:36,367 --> 00:09:38,286
Huh?
Less yakkin', more crackin'!
186
00:09:38,369 --> 00:09:41,122
Now, Homer,
we don't actually crack backs.
187
00:09:41,205 --> 00:09:43,040
It's merely an adjustment.
188
00:09:43,124 --> 00:09:45,459
OK, you're gonna hear
a loud cracking sound.
189
00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:47,503
-(loud cracking)
-There we go.
190
00:09:47,587 --> 00:09:51,924
-Hey. It feels a little better.
-Mm-hmm.
191
00:09:52,008 --> 00:09:53,467
I thought it might.
192
00:09:53,551 --> 00:09:57,346
Now, I'll need to see you three times
a week for, uh, many years.
193
00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:59,307
(humming)
194
00:10:00,099 --> 00:10:02,727
-So how was it in the slammer?
-Terrific.
195
00:10:02,810 --> 00:10:06,689
Bart, Sideshow Bob says
he'll be seeing you real soon.
196
00:10:06,772 --> 00:10:08,524
(chuckles) That Bob!
197
00:10:08,608 --> 00:10:12,612
Oh, and guess who's up for parole.
My diamond in the rough.
198
00:10:12,695 --> 00:10:16,407
-That scary guy?
-Scary talented.
199
00:10:16,490 --> 00:10:18,826
And I'm gonna make sure
the parole board knows it.
200
00:10:18,909 --> 00:10:19,785
You gonna bribe 'em?
201
00:10:19,869 --> 00:10:23,873
Well, I might grease the wheels of justice
with some cookies.
202
00:10:23,956 --> 00:10:26,917
-Oh, can I have some?
-Not till you finish your sundae.
203
00:10:27,001 --> 00:10:30,421
Ohh! (gulps, gasps)
204
00:10:30,504 --> 00:10:32,965
-Is that enough?
-Two more bites!
205
00:10:36,969 --> 00:10:39,639
I'm sure your macaroons
are scrumptious, Marge.
206
00:10:39,722 --> 00:10:41,641
But I've seen this warden
turn down brownies--
207
00:10:41,724 --> 00:10:42,808
honest to goodness brownies!
208
00:10:42,892 --> 00:10:44,727
Next! (munching)
209
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,314
Oh, it's you.
210
00:10:48,397 --> 00:10:51,651
Well, just let me ink up
my old "denied" stamp.
211
00:10:51,734 --> 00:10:55,237
Warden, please.
This man is a gentle soul.
212
00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:58,699
I know he's made mistakes,
but someone with his talent
213
00:10:58,783 --> 00:11:03,037
belongs on a boardwalk doing caricatures,
not behind bars.
214
00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:06,374
Lady, I know he charmed you
with some "pleases" and "thank-yous,"
215
00:11:06,457 --> 00:11:09,543
but he wasn't so polite
to the guy he shot.
216
00:11:09,627 --> 00:11:10,670
Actually he was.
217
00:11:10,753 --> 00:11:14,298
He waited with me till the ambulance came
then ran like a deer.
218
00:11:14,382 --> 00:11:16,384
Well, that's mighty nice.
219
00:11:16,467 --> 00:11:17,677
But if I let this creep out,
220
00:11:17,760 --> 00:11:20,513
would you like him skulking
around your neighborhood?
221
00:11:20,596 --> 00:11:22,223
Honestly, it wouldn't bother me.
222
00:11:22,890 --> 00:11:23,808
(whispering, indistinct)
223
00:11:23,891 --> 00:11:26,394
-Yeah, let's do it.
-Well, lady, I'm gonna call your bluff.
224
00:11:26,477 --> 00:11:30,064
The prisoner is hereby
paroled into your custody.
225
00:11:30,147 --> 00:11:32,650
(gasps) Oh-Oh, my goodness.
226
00:11:32,733 --> 00:11:34,819
I'm free? Oh, Mrs. Simpson.
227
00:11:34,902 --> 00:11:37,947
-(choking)
-Oh, geez, I'm sorry.
228
00:11:38,030 --> 00:11:39,031
Sorry.
229
00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:42,076
You won't regret this.
230
00:11:46,163 --> 00:11:47,707
I hope this is OK.
231
00:11:47,790 --> 00:11:50,626
-It's not very prison-y.
-It's more than I deserve, ma'am.
232
00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:54,004
Now, which way is Mecca?
'Cause I gotta do a little prayin'.
233
00:11:54,088 --> 00:11:57,341
Uh, Mecca? Well, let--
234
00:11:57,425 --> 00:12:00,970
Nah! (laughing)
I'm just yanking your chain!
235
00:12:01,053 --> 00:12:03,139
(laughing) I'm Jewish.
236
00:12:03,222 --> 00:12:06,434
-(groaning)
-(cracking)
237
00:12:06,517 --> 00:12:10,938
Ow! Oh, my back.
Dr. Steve didn't do anything!
238
00:12:11,021 --> 00:12:14,024
-Did you do those exercises he gave you?
-Yeah, right.
239
00:12:14,108 --> 00:12:15,860
I did 'em while you were studying.
240
00:12:15,943 --> 00:12:16,777
(both laugh)
241
00:12:16,861 --> 00:12:18,404
-Ow!
-(cracking)
242
00:12:18,487 --> 00:12:21,365
-Oh! Ow!
-Dad, are you OK?
243
00:12:21,449 --> 00:12:25,119
Yeah. In fact, I feel fantastic!
244
00:12:25,202 --> 00:12:27,496
(laughing)
245
00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:29,707
That trash can must've
unkinked your back!
246
00:12:29,790 --> 00:12:33,878
Not trash can, son.
Dr. Homer's Miracle Spine-O-Cylinder!
247
00:12:33,961 --> 00:12:36,255
-Patent pending.
-OK, OK.
248
00:12:36,338 --> 00:12:39,925
And as you can see,
the unique dents in my invention...
249
00:12:40,009 --> 00:12:43,804
perfectly match the contours
of the human "vertebrains."
250
00:12:43,888 --> 00:12:47,183
Hmm. Patent pending,
patent pending, patent pending.
251
00:12:47,266 --> 00:12:50,352
-Hey, who's this guy?
-You remember Jack.
252
00:12:50,436 --> 00:12:55,107
He's that talented painter
who had a little brush with the law.
253
00:12:55,191 --> 00:12:59,403
You brought a convict to live here
near my unpatented idea?
254
00:12:59,487 --> 00:13:03,699
I seen your idea, and I don't want it.
All I need is three squares and a job.
255
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:05,826
That's right, a job.
256
00:13:09,163 --> 00:13:11,582
I know just where you can get one.
257
00:13:12,416 --> 00:13:14,668
So, Homer, you think
you can fix my sciatica?
258
00:13:14,752 --> 00:13:18,088
Hmm. I don't know what that is,
so I'm gonna say yes.
259
00:13:18,172 --> 00:13:20,341
{\an8}-Now go limp.
-I'm limp.
260
00:13:20,424 --> 00:13:23,052
{\an8}-One, two, better not sue.
-(groaning)
261
00:13:23,135 --> 00:13:23,969
{\an8}(cracking)
262
00:13:24,762 --> 00:13:29,767
Hey, it worked! My searing leg pain
is now a gentle numbness.
263
00:13:29,850 --> 00:13:30,726
Next!
264
00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:33,479
Yes, uh, my car seems to have broken down,
265
00:13:33,562 --> 00:13:35,606
and I was wondering
if I could use your--
266
00:13:35,689 --> 00:13:37,858
-Oh! That's a pushing motion!
-(cracking)
267
00:13:37,942 --> 00:13:39,610
Simpson, you're not
a licensed chiropractor.
268
00:13:39,693 --> 00:13:42,530
And you're stealing patients
from me and Dr. Steffi.
269
00:13:42,613 --> 00:13:44,573
Boy, talk about irony.
270
00:13:44,657 --> 00:13:47,868
The AMA tries to drive
you guys out of business.
271
00:13:47,952 --> 00:13:49,870
Now you're doing the same to me!
272
00:13:50,621 --> 00:13:52,957
-Think about the irony.
-(grunts)
273
00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:55,918
-(groans)
-You've been warned. Stop chiropracting!
274
00:13:56,001 --> 00:13:58,754
Not unless you think
about the irony!
275
00:14:00,172 --> 00:14:02,216
I read in the Daily Fourth Gradian
276
00:14:02,299 --> 00:14:03,968
that you need someone
to paint a mural.
277
00:14:04,051 --> 00:14:06,595
Yes. School spirit
is down 3.4 percent.
278
00:14:06,679 --> 00:14:09,306
Well, Jack here
will do great work for you.
279
00:14:09,390 --> 00:14:10,307
Oh, any references?
280
00:14:10,975 --> 00:14:12,226
Well, to be honest with you,
281
00:14:12,309 --> 00:14:14,311
I spent the last six years
in Waterville State--
282
00:14:14,395 --> 00:14:16,897
It's a small liberal arts college.
283
00:14:16,981 --> 00:14:19,441
Very law-abiding.
No convicts at all.
284
00:14:19,525 --> 00:14:21,694
Well, the only other one
to apply was Moe Szyslak
285
00:14:21,777 --> 00:14:23,863
and his stuff scares
the hell out of me.
286
00:14:23,946 --> 00:14:27,575
Eww! How could anyone
consider that making love?
287
00:14:27,658 --> 00:14:29,618
All right, Jack. You're hired.
288
00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:31,120
I'll clear you out a cubby.
289
00:14:32,329 --> 00:14:34,999
-You told a lie for me.
-I know.
290
00:14:35,082 --> 00:14:38,586
But the Lord will forgive me
if it helps you get a second chance.
291
00:14:38,669 --> 00:14:42,131
(sighs) Actually, Marge, it's the third
if you count that farm couple.
292
00:14:42,214 --> 00:14:43,090
Farm couple?
293
00:14:43,173 --> 00:14:45,676
But I got a good feelin' about this one,
Marge. I really do.
294
00:14:45,759 --> 00:14:47,636
(worried murmur)
295
00:14:51,724 --> 00:14:55,978
That is awesome.
Finally, art that doesn't suck.
296
00:14:56,061 --> 00:14:57,980
Dear Lord! What are you doing?
297
00:14:58,063 --> 00:15:01,317
-You don't like it?
-No, no! It's all wrong.
298
00:15:01,400 --> 00:15:03,986
A shapely female form has no place in art.
299
00:15:04,069 --> 00:15:05,279
But, uh, what I thought is--
300
00:15:05,362 --> 00:15:07,656
I sketched out exactly what I wanted.
301
00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:09,241
Yeah-- No--
But see what I was goin' for was--
302
00:15:09,325 --> 00:15:11,285
Did you even look at the napkin?
303
00:15:12,578 --> 00:15:14,997
Oh, I was in the zone that day.
304
00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:18,459
Yeah. You see, I didn't want
to go so cutesy-wootsy.
305
00:15:18,542 --> 00:15:22,254
-Because...
-Because it's not my style.
306
00:15:22,338 --> 00:15:25,799
Well, if you want to keep this job,
you'll make it your style.
307
00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:28,761
All right.
You're the boss man, ain't ya?
308
00:15:28,844 --> 00:15:30,554
Darn right I'm the boss.
309
00:15:30,638 --> 00:15:34,141
Don't forget I can send you back
where you came from, college boy.
310
00:15:34,224 --> 00:15:36,143
(groans)
311
00:15:40,356 --> 00:15:41,649
(grunting)
312
00:15:43,651 --> 00:15:46,695
That punk Skinner.
I had more freedom back at the joint.
313
00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:52,326
Oh, Jack, I know you hate to betray
your artistic vision, but just do it.
314
00:15:52,409 --> 00:15:55,746
-I guess I could bend a little.
-Just till you make it.
315
00:15:55,829 --> 00:15:59,375
Remember, I believe in you.
316
00:16:00,125 --> 00:16:03,128
(grunting) Thanks, Marge.
317
00:16:03,212 --> 00:16:04,630
Listen, if you're done
with that washing machine,
318
00:16:04,713 --> 00:16:05,839
can I make some booze in it?
319
00:16:05,923 --> 00:16:08,926
-Not until you finish your sundae.
-Yes, ma'am.
320
00:16:10,719 --> 00:16:14,473
-(groaning)
-What's wrong with my sundaes?
321
00:16:14,556 --> 00:16:16,976
Careful, I'm frail. (grunting)
322
00:16:17,059 --> 00:16:18,185
(cracking)
323
00:16:19,603 --> 00:16:23,107
-OK, that should do it, Moe.
-Hey, it don't hurt no more.
324
00:16:23,190 --> 00:16:26,402
Ha! Now I can focus on
my crippling emotional pain.
325
00:16:26,485 --> 00:16:29,363
Oh, Daddy, Daddy, why?
Why won't you hug me?
326
00:16:29,738 --> 00:16:31,240
You hugged the mailman!
327
00:16:31,323 --> 00:16:34,118
Excuse me, sir.
Is this El Clinico Magnifico?
328
00:16:34,201 --> 00:16:36,537
Ah, you saw our bus ad.
329
00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:40,499
We'd, uh, like to invest in
your spinal adjustment device.
330
00:16:40,582 --> 00:16:43,544
We might be able to do business.
(stifled squeal)
331
00:16:43,627 --> 00:16:45,713
We'll need to take some photographs.
332
00:16:45,796 --> 00:16:47,589
Hey, where you going with that?
333
00:16:47,923 --> 00:16:49,341
(grunting)
334
00:16:51,593 --> 00:16:54,930
Wait a minute.
No investor could bend like that!
335
00:16:55,014 --> 00:16:56,640
They're chiropractors!
336
00:16:56,724 --> 00:16:59,768
-(both grunting)
-Come on, come on. Let's go!
337
00:17:00,394 --> 00:17:01,228
(tires screech)
338
00:17:02,187 --> 00:17:05,983
No! My Spine-O-Cylinder!
339
00:17:06,066 --> 00:17:09,778
They'll pay for what
they did to my can!
340
00:17:09,862 --> 00:17:12,281
Forget it, Homer.
It's Chiro-town.
341
00:17:16,618 --> 00:17:19,204
You know, when Superintendent Chalmers
suggested a school mural,
342
00:17:19,288 --> 00:17:23,292
I almost thought he said a school Muriel.
(laughs)
343
00:17:24,001 --> 00:17:25,377
Muriel's his sister.
344
00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:27,755
-And, uh-
-(gun cocking)
345
00:17:30,007 --> 00:17:33,844
-Oh, thank you, Bruce Vilanch.
-Whoopi would've made it work.
346
00:17:33,927 --> 00:17:38,932
And now I present Puma Pride
by a college-educated artist--
347
00:17:39,016 --> 00:17:41,894
-ALL: Ooh!
-Jack Crowley.
348
00:17:41,977 --> 00:17:43,854
(applauding)
349
00:17:45,355 --> 00:17:48,984
-Man, is that wimpy.
-(groans) What happened to the cool one?
350
00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:52,404
-Well, my original idea was--
-Jeepers, that's sugary even for my taste.
351
00:17:52,488 --> 00:17:54,656
-Yeah, but Skinner said I had--
-(crowd murmuring)
352
00:17:54,740 --> 00:18:00,329
Skinner! How are we going to raise
school spirit with this sappy hokum?
353
00:18:00,412 --> 00:18:03,040
I know, sir.
It's an embarrassment.
354
00:18:03,123 --> 00:18:06,251
This isn't what I wanted.
Where's the edge?
355
00:18:06,335 --> 00:18:08,670
I followed your napkin.
356
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:12,216
No napkin could wipe
the crumbs of failure from your mouth!
357
00:18:12,299 --> 00:18:14,551
-No! No, don't fight.
-(grunts)
358
00:18:14,635 --> 00:18:17,846
All great art
is controversial at first.
359
00:18:17,930 --> 00:18:22,768
But years from now, people will point
to these cuddly little creatures and say,
360
00:18:22,851 --> 00:18:24,978
"That's a Jack Crowley."
361
00:18:25,062 --> 00:18:25,938
(groaning)
362
00:18:27,022 --> 00:18:30,984
Now, uh, pizza's working well
on Thursday.
363
00:18:31,068 --> 00:18:33,487
But I think the kids
will follow it to Tuesday.
364
00:18:33,570 --> 00:18:36,156
That's what you said
about the stuffed peppers,
365
00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:38,200
and you lost the young males!
366
00:18:38,283 --> 00:18:41,870
-Principal Skinner, the school's on fire!
-(gasps)
367
00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:44,331
CHILDREN:
Spread, spread, spread!
368
00:18:44,414 --> 00:18:46,792
-Spread, spread, spread!
-It's crystal clear who did this--
369
00:18:46,875 --> 00:18:47,918
Jack Crowley!
370
00:18:48,001 --> 00:18:51,130
No way. You don't know
that Jack did this.
371
00:18:51,213 --> 00:18:55,092
-Just because he's an ex-con-- Ooh!
-Crowley's an ex-con?
372
00:18:55,175 --> 00:18:57,094
Dear Lord, I've peed
in front of him!
373
00:18:57,177 --> 00:18:58,929
Hey, check it out!
374
00:19:00,681 --> 00:19:04,351
-(children exclaiming)
-Ha! Now that's a mural!
375
00:19:04,434 --> 00:19:07,688
It's so passionate.
It almost leaps off the wall.
376
00:19:10,274 --> 00:19:11,400
Oh.
377
00:19:11,483 --> 00:19:13,694
That felon could've torched
the whole school--
378
00:19:13,777 --> 00:19:15,863
were it not stuffed with asbestos.
379
00:19:15,946 --> 00:19:17,281
We'll catch Crowley.
380
00:19:17,364 --> 00:19:21,743
And then he'll learn the fine art
of police brutality.
381
00:19:25,914 --> 00:19:28,041
Psst! Marge, over here.
382
00:19:30,043 --> 00:19:35,465
Oh, Jack. You threw it all away
over a stupid feud with Skinner.
383
00:19:35,549 --> 00:19:39,970
Look, I'll admit I hate Skinner.
But I didn't start that fire.
384
00:19:40,053 --> 00:19:42,681
-Then why are you hiding?
-Come on, Marge.
385
00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:45,601
With my rap sheet, they can't wait
to send me back to prison.
386
00:19:45,684 --> 00:19:47,728
And you can't believe
the foul language in that place.
387
00:19:47,811 --> 00:19:50,397
So you really didn't do it?
388
00:19:50,480 --> 00:19:53,609
Marge, look in my eyes.
389
00:19:53,692 --> 00:19:56,195
I swear to you I did not do it.
390
00:19:57,571 --> 00:19:59,740
I believe you, Jack.
391
00:19:59,823 --> 00:20:03,702
Now, let's get you out of here.
Wait for my signal.
392
00:20:03,785 --> 00:20:05,996
Oh, Chief?
393
00:20:06,079 --> 00:20:09,917
I found some evidence that points
to the real arsonist.
394
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:13,837
-Well, let's see it.
-Not yet. You have to guess what it is.
395
00:20:13,921 --> 00:20:16,340
We don't have time
for guessing games!
396
00:20:16,423 --> 00:20:18,550
Nah, let's try it.
It might be fun.
397
00:20:18,634 --> 00:20:20,427
-Is it D.N.A?
-(groans coyly)
398
00:20:20,510 --> 00:20:23,555
So it's like D.N.A.
Um, a hatchet?
399
00:20:23,639 --> 00:20:25,641
You had a turn. I want to guess.
400
00:20:25,724 --> 00:20:29,728
-(clicks tongue) Oh, geez.
-(gasps) My car!
401
00:20:29,811 --> 00:20:32,147
(cackling)
402
00:20:33,857 --> 00:20:36,485
Puma Pride! Puma Pride!
403
00:20:36,568 --> 00:20:38,320
(cackling)
404
00:20:38,403 --> 00:20:41,865
Catch the fever, Skinner!
(cackling)
405
00:20:46,662 --> 00:20:48,789
You crumb bum!
406
00:20:48,872 --> 00:20:51,625
You looked me right in the eye
and lied to me!
407
00:20:51,708 --> 00:20:55,003
Marge, this is the God's truth.
I burned the mural.
408
00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:57,130
But I did not burn Skinner's car.
409
00:20:57,214 --> 00:20:59,174
I just saw you!
410
00:20:59,258 --> 00:21:02,302
-Get him outta here, Chief!
-Yes, ma'am.
411
00:21:03,762 --> 00:21:07,182
My wife and I like watching
that Oz show on HBO.
412
00:21:07,266 --> 00:21:09,643
Uh, i-- is prison really like that?
413
00:21:09,726 --> 00:21:13,105
-Wouldn't know. We only get basic cable.
-Ouch.
414
00:21:13,188 --> 00:21:15,649
Yeah, I also like that Sex in the City.
Huh!
415
00:21:15,732 --> 00:21:19,403
None of those girls look like my wife.
(laughing)
416
00:21:19,486 --> 00:21:22,572
-Sports Center's not bad.
-Yeah. I never got that show.
417
00:21:22,656 --> 00:21:26,410
-What's to get? They just tell the scores.
-Yeah, I suppose. Yeah.
418
00:21:26,493 --> 00:21:30,372
Hey, you ever meet any mob guys?
Are they really like The Sopranos?
419
00:21:30,455 --> 00:21:34,167
-I told you. We just get basic cable.
-Oh, right, right, right, right.
420
00:21:34,251 --> 00:21:37,671
Listen, if I'm getting too chatty,
just, uh-- just tell me to shut up.
421
00:21:37,754 --> 00:21:38,880
CROWLEY: Nah, I'm enjoyin'it.
422
00:21:38,964 --> 00:21:40,966
Hey, you ever watch them
strong-man contests?
423
00:21:41,049 --> 00:21:42,801
They're pretty good.
Those guys look strong.
424
00:21:42,884 --> 00:21:45,721
{\an8}A lot of guys in prison say they're gay,
but I don't know. They look strong to me.
425
00:21:46,930 --> 00:21:47,973
(theme music playing)
426
00:22:25,635 --> 00:22:27,888
-(murmuring)
-Shh!
427
00:22:30,932 --> 00:22:32,934
{\an8}Captioned by
Visual Data Media Services