1 00:00:01,835 --> 00:00:02,836 (theme song playing) 2 00:00:02,919 --> 00:00:06,214 CHORUS: ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 3 00:00:17,142 --> 00:00:19,519 (bell ringing) 4 00:00:23,857 --> 00:00:25,817 (whistle blows) 5 00:00:38,997 --> 00:00:43,501 (playing the blues) 6 00:00:59,225 --> 00:01:00,685 (honking horn) 7 00:01:00,769 --> 00:01:01,978 (tires screeching) 8 00:01:04,189 --> 00:01:06,107 D'oh! (screams) 9 00:01:06,191 --> 00:01:07,400 (tires screeching) 10 00:01:08,359 --> 00:01:09,360 BART: Whoa! 11 00:01:10,487 --> 00:01:11,905 -(Homer yelling) -(crashing) 12 00:01:23,291 --> 00:01:24,959 {\an8}MAN (on TV): The Cyborganizer. 13 00:01:25,043 --> 00:01:26,419 {\an8}A high-tech robocop 14 00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:28,880 {\an8}created for one purpose only, 15 00:01:28,963 --> 00:01:32,425 {\an8}to help the N.Y.P.D. tackle its tedious paperwork. 16 00:01:32,509 --> 00:01:34,094 {\an8}Good work, Cyborganizer. 17 00:01:34,177 --> 00:01:36,137 {\an8}I can streamline any procedure 18 00:01:36,221 --> 00:01:38,473 {\an8}except this thing you call "love." 19 00:01:38,556 --> 00:01:40,934 {\an8}Aw... Poor Cyborganizer. 20 00:01:41,017 --> 00:01:44,062 {\an8}Homer, sitting that close to the TV can't be good for you. 21 00:01:44,145 --> 00:01:46,606 {\an8}Talking while the TV's on can't be good for you. 22 00:01:46,689 --> 00:01:47,941 {\an8}You should get your eyes checked. 23 00:01:48,024 --> 00:01:49,067 {\an8}I'm taking Bart to the mall 24 00:01:49,150 --> 00:01:50,652 {\an8}to buy camping supplies. 25 00:01:50,735 --> 00:01:51,903 {\an8}Why don't you come along? 26 00:01:51,986 --> 00:01:53,571 {\an8}Nah, I want to enjoy the show 27 00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:55,323 {\an8}before the network retools it. 28 00:01:56,616 --> 00:01:59,244 {\an8}How can I organize this modeling agency 29 00:01:59,327 --> 00:02:01,871 {\an8}and still be a good single father? 30 00:02:01,955 --> 00:02:03,665 {\an8}I love you, Daddy. 31 00:02:03,748 --> 00:02:05,333 {\an8}Aw! Too late! 32 00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:10,213 {\an8}We need something quick. 33 00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:12,090 {\an8}My husband's eyes are really shot. 34 00:02:12,173 --> 00:02:14,509 {\an8}Whee! Touch the sky, Maggie. 35 00:02:14,592 --> 00:02:16,678 {\an8}Whee! Touch the sky! 36 00:02:16,761 --> 00:02:17,971 {\an8}Dad, I've got Maggie. 37 00:02:18,054 --> 00:02:19,222 {\an8}Who said that? 38 00:02:19,305 --> 00:02:20,473 {\an8}(exclaims angrily) 39 00:02:20,557 --> 00:02:21,558 {\an8}Come on, Bart. 40 00:02:21,641 --> 00:02:22,851 {\an8}While your dad gets his glasses, 41 00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:24,310 {\an8}we'll go shop for your trip. 42 00:02:24,394 --> 00:02:26,146 {\an8}Oh, I hate shopping. 43 00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:28,064 {\an8}Just get me a deck of cards and I'll win whatever I need 44 00:02:28,148 --> 00:02:29,149 {\an8}from the other kids. 45 00:02:29,232 --> 00:02:31,192 {\an8}But you need to try things on. 46 00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:33,736 {\an8}Every brand has a different idea of husky. 47 00:02:33,820 --> 00:02:35,947 {\an8}(grunts) I'm in tantrum position. 48 00:02:36,030 --> 00:02:38,491 {\an8}"T" minus five, four, three... 49 00:02:38,575 --> 00:02:39,993 {\an8}Remembering dead cat for real tears. 50 00:02:40,076 --> 00:02:41,077 {\an8}(crying) 51 00:02:41,161 --> 00:02:43,246 {\an8}Fine. You win. 52 00:02:43,329 --> 00:02:45,165 {\an8}I'll do your shopping for you. 53 00:02:45,248 --> 00:02:46,541 {\an8}Tantrum averted. 54 00:02:46,624 --> 00:02:49,711 {\an8}But now I can't forget the cat. (sobbing) 55 00:02:49,794 --> 00:02:51,421 {\an8}OK, let's get started. 56 00:02:51,963 --> 00:02:54,716 {\an8}-(snoring) -Oh! Hey, wake up! 57 00:02:54,799 --> 00:02:56,217 {\an8}(mumbling) Sorry. 58 00:02:56,301 --> 00:03:00,138 {\an8}-Now, read the first line. -"I, eight, p-p." 59 00:03:00,221 --> 00:03:02,432 {\an8}-(giggling) -Why you little... 60 00:03:02,515 --> 00:03:05,852 {\an8}-(grunting) -(gagging) 61 00:03:05,935 --> 00:03:07,270 {\an8}WOMAN: Better, or worse? 62 00:03:07,353 --> 00:03:08,813 {\an8}HOMER: Worse! (grunting) 63 00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:10,190 {\an8}WOMAN: Better, or worse? 64 00:03:10,273 --> 00:03:11,816 {\an8}HOMER: Much better! 65 00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:14,068 {\an8}(gagging) Dad! 66 00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:17,238 {\an8}That pair's popular with celebrities like Val Kilmer. 67 00:03:17,322 --> 00:03:20,200 {\an8}-Ooh, my favorite Door. -And Yoko Ono. 68 00:03:20,283 --> 00:03:23,244 {\an8}Ew! She ruined The Plastic Ono Band. 69 00:03:23,328 --> 00:03:25,371 {\an8}Maybe you're a candidate for laser eye surgery. 70 00:03:25,455 --> 00:03:27,332 {\an8}Will it get me out of having to choosing glasses? 71 00:03:27,415 --> 00:03:29,125 {\an8}Well, yes, but I must warn you 72 00:03:29,209 --> 00:03:31,294 {\an8}it's an experimental procedure and we still don't know 73 00:03:31,377 --> 00:03:33,379 {\an8}-the long-term effects. -Less yappin', more zappin'! 74 00:03:34,255 --> 00:03:35,757 Well, looks like we got everything 75 00:03:35,840 --> 00:03:37,383 for Bart's camping trip. 76 00:03:37,467 --> 00:03:39,552 Blair Witch repellent, antler saw, 77 00:03:39,636 --> 00:03:41,262 and deep woods Scrabble. 78 00:03:41,346 --> 00:03:43,932 (gasps) Ooh, Tango De La Muerte! 79 00:03:44,015 --> 00:03:46,017 I've been dying to see that movie. 80 00:03:46,100 --> 00:03:48,978 {\an8}It got rave reviews from both the Entertainment Radio Network 81 00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:50,480 {\an8}and the Radio Entertainment Network. 82 00:03:50,563 --> 00:03:51,856 Let's go. 83 00:03:51,940 --> 00:03:55,818 -(zapping) -(Homer screaming) 84 00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:57,528 Wait. You've got to use these drops. 85 00:03:57,612 --> 00:03:59,197 They prevent your eyes from crusting over. 86 00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:02,116 Oh, here we go with the add-ons. No, thanks. 87 00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:10,583 Now that my severed foot has been reattached, 88 00:04:10,667 --> 00:04:12,710 I must win back the coveted dance title 89 00:04:12,794 --> 00:04:14,128 "Locolegs." 90 00:04:14,212 --> 00:04:16,714 As your wise but alcoholic dance coach, 91 00:04:16,798 --> 00:04:18,007 I know that somewhere 92 00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:19,926 your father is looking down on you 93 00:04:20,009 --> 00:04:21,427 and smiling. 94 00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:22,720 Oh, there he is. 95 00:04:23,137 --> 00:04:25,181 And now, I must choose a beautiful partner 96 00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:26,808 for the big dance contest. 97 00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:29,394 Hmm... 98 00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:31,062 (grunts) 99 00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:32,730 Mm-hmm... 100 00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:33,982 (grunts) 101 00:04:34,649 --> 00:04:37,402 No. (gasps) Hmm... 102 00:04:37,485 --> 00:04:39,279 Oh, he'll never dance with her. 103 00:04:39,362 --> 00:04:41,489 She'll have to settle for some Mexican Milhouse. 104 00:04:41,572 --> 00:04:42,824 I demand to know your name. 105 00:04:42,907 --> 00:04:44,951 My name is Lisabella. 106 00:04:45,034 --> 00:04:47,537 (gasping) That's my name with "bella" on the end of it. 107 00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:49,747 Ask her. Oh, God, please, ask her to dance. 108 00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:52,750 I shall dance... with her. 109 00:04:52,834 --> 00:04:54,585 -(grunts) - Que malo. 110 00:04:54,669 --> 00:04:58,089 Once again, I must sugar my own churro. 111 00:04:58,172 --> 00:05:00,550 But I am just a simple librarian. 112 00:05:00,633 --> 00:05:02,760 I've only read about dancing in books. 113 00:05:02,844 --> 00:05:07,473 (chuckles) I will show you something that is in no book. 114 00:05:07,557 --> 00:05:10,768 -(all gasping) -(gasping) Ooh... 115 00:05:12,353 --> 00:05:15,982 (moaning and gasps) Mmm... 116 00:05:16,065 --> 00:05:18,401 She's not plain. She's beautiful. 117 00:05:21,070 --> 00:05:25,325 (tango music playing) 118 00:05:25,408 --> 00:05:27,035 (applause) 119 00:05:27,118 --> 00:05:29,287 There is just one dance that will beat them, 120 00:05:29,370 --> 00:05:31,289 The tango de la muerte. 121 00:05:31,372 --> 00:05:33,583 (gasps) Only one was crazy enough 122 00:05:33,666 --> 00:05:35,585 to dance that dance and he is dead. 123 00:05:35,668 --> 00:05:37,712 My twin brother, Freduardo. 124 00:05:37,795 --> 00:05:40,214 But where he died, I shall live, 125 00:05:40,298 --> 00:05:41,424 in his apartment. 126 00:05:43,468 --> 00:05:46,054 (tango music playing) 127 00:05:50,266 --> 00:05:51,976 (all gasping) 128 00:06:02,570 --> 00:06:04,614 (applause) 129 00:06:04,697 --> 00:06:06,366 You are now carrying my child. 130 00:06:06,449 --> 00:06:07,450 But how? 131 00:06:07,533 --> 00:06:09,494 It is the mystery of the dance. 132 00:06:14,957 --> 00:06:16,959 Oh, Mom, I want to be a dancer. 133 00:06:17,043 --> 00:06:18,961 That's wonderful, honey. 134 00:06:19,045 --> 00:06:20,588 We should ask your father, though. 135 00:06:20,671 --> 00:06:22,215 Where is he, anyway? 136 00:06:22,757 --> 00:06:25,718 (imitating Marge) Now, Homey, when we get to the liquor store 137 00:06:25,802 --> 00:06:29,180 buy me some Jack Daniels and a carton of smokes. 138 00:06:29,263 --> 00:06:32,100 -Yes, dear. -(snickering) 139 00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:38,022 (metal squealing) 140 00:06:38,648 --> 00:06:42,610 MARGE: Mmm... I remember Little Vicki Valentine. 141 00:06:42,693 --> 00:06:44,278 Her perky smile and dancing 142 00:06:44,362 --> 00:06:46,656 brought America right out of the depression. 143 00:06:46,739 --> 00:06:48,866 {\an8}Well, I think World War II helped a little, Mom. 144 00:06:48,950 --> 00:06:50,701 Don't smart-mouth, Lisa. 145 00:06:50,785 --> 00:06:54,414 -A great big sunshine hello to you. -Hi, Little Vicki. 146 00:06:54,497 --> 00:06:57,208 (chuckles) That was such a long time ago. 147 00:06:57,291 --> 00:06:58,918 I'm just plain Vicki now. 148 00:06:59,001 --> 00:07:00,294 All right. I'd like to sign 149 00:07:00,378 --> 00:07:02,171 my daughter up for lessons, Vicki. 150 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:04,215 -"Little Vicki." -But you just said-- 151 00:07:04,298 --> 00:07:06,634 So, what dance style were you interested in? 152 00:07:06,717 --> 00:07:08,302 We have ever so many. 153 00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:09,887 There's ballroom... 154 00:07:10,638 --> 00:07:13,224 Ow! You stepped on my toes again! 155 00:07:13,307 --> 00:07:15,101 If you would just let me lead... 156 00:07:15,184 --> 00:07:16,769 You're not a leader, Seymour. 157 00:07:16,853 --> 00:07:18,855 Never have been, never will be. 158 00:07:18,938 --> 00:07:19,939 Oh! 159 00:07:20,022 --> 00:07:21,232 There's square-dancing... 160 00:07:21,315 --> 00:07:23,776 ♪ Oh, the birdie in the cage odd lady in the center ♪ 161 00:07:23,860 --> 00:07:25,445 ♪ Now the birdie is purty and the crows hop in ♪ 162 00:07:25,528 --> 00:07:26,612 ♪ Pluck the feather all together ♪ 163 00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:28,072 ♪ Hell-bent for leather... ♪ 164 00:07:28,156 --> 00:07:29,490 Or there's the dance 165 00:07:29,574 --> 00:07:32,493 that made me ever so famous, tap. 166 00:07:32,577 --> 00:07:34,120 (tapping) 167 00:07:34,203 --> 00:07:36,414 But I want to learn a dance I can use in real life 168 00:07:36,497 --> 00:07:38,666 like the tango de la muerte. 169 00:07:38,749 --> 00:07:40,001 Oh, bless your heart. 170 00:07:40,084 --> 00:07:41,419 Let's get you some tap shoes. 171 00:07:41,502 --> 00:07:42,837 Uh, Little Vicki, 172 00:07:42,920 --> 00:07:44,589 I really think she had her heart set on-- 173 00:07:44,672 --> 00:07:47,091 A little advice... Don't live through your child. 174 00:07:47,175 --> 00:07:48,176 OK. 175 00:07:52,555 --> 00:07:54,182 Camp is going to be great. 176 00:07:54,265 --> 00:07:57,226 Seven days without parents, homework or ear medicine. 177 00:07:57,310 --> 00:07:58,519 -(grunts) -Yes, sir. 178 00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:00,062 This is going to be the best week 179 00:08:00,146 --> 00:08:01,522 of our young lives. 180 00:08:01,606 --> 00:08:03,774 I'm going to pound you two all week. 181 00:08:03,858 --> 00:08:05,109 Oh, what'd we do? 182 00:08:05,193 --> 00:08:07,612 Nothing. But I got to pound somebody. 183 00:08:08,196 --> 00:08:09,405 NELSON: Ha-ha! 184 00:08:11,282 --> 00:08:12,658 Now where do we go? 185 00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:14,410 Well, I don't want to go home. 186 00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:15,912 My grandma's sleeping in my bed 187 00:08:15,995 --> 00:08:18,456 {\an8}and she has skin like a basketball. 188 00:08:18,539 --> 00:08:19,874 Wait a minute. 189 00:08:19,957 --> 00:08:22,293 Everybody thinks we're at camp this week. 190 00:08:22,376 --> 00:08:23,878 We can stay wherever we want! 191 00:08:23,961 --> 00:08:26,214 Yeah! Like the four seasons! 192 00:08:26,297 --> 00:08:28,049 Each room has its own safe. 193 00:08:28,132 --> 00:08:30,551 I've got a better place. 194 00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:33,304 -The mall? -Yeah. 195 00:08:33,387 --> 00:08:35,306 It's just like my dad always says, 196 00:08:35,389 --> 00:08:36,432 For an evening or a week, 197 00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:37,975 there's no place like the mall. 198 00:08:38,059 --> 00:08:39,227 Food, fun and fashion, 199 00:08:39,310 --> 00:08:41,103 the mall has it all. 200 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:43,856 What? What did he say? 201 00:08:45,149 --> 00:08:48,903 Now, the key to great dancing is one word, 202 00:08:48,986 --> 00:08:50,238 tapa-tapa-tapa. 203 00:08:51,822 --> 00:08:53,324 Tapa-tapa-tapa. 204 00:08:56,202 --> 00:08:58,746 Teacher, my shoes are making noise. 205 00:08:59,288 --> 00:09:00,706 You must be Ralph. 206 00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:02,458 My daddy shoots people. 207 00:09:07,255 --> 00:09:08,297 Good. 208 00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:11,968 Good. Wait a minute, somebody's off the beat. 209 00:09:12,051 --> 00:09:13,135 Let me hear you two. 210 00:09:14,929 --> 00:09:15,930 OK, now you. 211 00:09:16,764 --> 00:09:18,516 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 212 00:09:18,599 --> 00:09:20,977 (all laughing) 213 00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:24,021 Children, stop it! For all you know, she has a medical condition. 214 00:09:24,105 --> 00:09:26,190 -Nope. -I see. 215 00:09:26,274 --> 00:09:27,275 (groans) 216 00:09:30,528 --> 00:09:32,029 This is way better than camp. 217 00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:34,448 No mosquitoes, no stupid camp songs... 218 00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:37,285 ♪ If you're happy and you know it, shop at Stan's ♪ 219 00:09:37,368 --> 00:09:40,204 ♪ Giant discounts on your favorite major brands... ♪ 220 00:09:40,288 --> 00:09:41,664 Attention, shoppers. 221 00:09:41,747 --> 00:09:44,333 The mall is now closed. 222 00:09:46,377 --> 00:09:48,879 OK, folks, you heard the recording, clear out. 223 00:09:48,963 --> 00:09:50,423 (both gasping) 224 00:09:51,173 --> 00:09:52,425 Quick! Up here! 225 00:09:52,508 --> 00:09:55,469 (both grunting) 226 00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:56,721 Where are we going? 227 00:09:56,804 --> 00:09:58,306 Quiet. Just keep scurrying. 228 00:09:58,389 --> 00:10:00,266 BOTH: Whoa! 229 00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:04,020 -Worms! -Gold! 230 00:10:04,103 --> 00:10:06,147 Wait. This is just chocolate. 231 00:10:06,897 --> 00:10:07,898 Chocolate! 232 00:10:07,982 --> 00:10:09,400 And these are Gummy Worms! 233 00:10:09,483 --> 00:10:12,236 -Gummy! -Warheads, Jelly Bellies... 234 00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:14,280 We're like two kids in a candy store! 235 00:10:14,363 --> 00:10:15,573 BOTH: Yes! 236 00:10:19,452 --> 00:10:20,703 Flavor's gone. 237 00:10:22,496 --> 00:10:23,706 Flavor's gone. 238 00:10:23,789 --> 00:10:25,207 Shoe fight! 239 00:10:25,291 --> 00:10:27,126 (both grunting) 240 00:10:27,209 --> 00:10:28,586 Ow! No golf shoes! 241 00:10:29,712 --> 00:10:31,339 -Ready, Milhouse? -Gimme a sec. 242 00:10:31,422 --> 00:10:32,798 (grunting) 243 00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:40,514 BART: Ready? Jump! (grunts) 244 00:10:40,598 --> 00:10:42,308 BOTH: Whoa! 245 00:10:42,391 --> 00:10:44,393 (both screaming) 246 00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:47,772 Whoa! 247 00:10:47,855 --> 00:10:50,650 Whoa! We're lumberjacks! 248 00:10:50,733 --> 00:10:53,194 Oh, my God! Look at this place! 249 00:10:53,277 --> 00:10:54,570 How could this happen? 250 00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:57,114 Candy chewed, wigs pulled from stands, 251 00:10:57,198 --> 00:10:59,659 cheese packages poked and re-poked. 252 00:11:01,994 --> 00:11:04,413 Every sign points to one obvious culprit, 253 00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:06,457 a giant rat. 254 00:11:07,541 --> 00:11:08,876 You'll have to shut down the mall. 255 00:11:08,959 --> 00:11:10,419 On Presidents' Day weekend? 256 00:11:10,503 --> 00:11:11,671 Are you crazy? 257 00:11:11,754 --> 00:11:12,838 Crazy with concern 258 00:11:12,922 --> 00:11:14,090 for the public, yes. 259 00:11:14,173 --> 00:11:15,299 Now shut this place down 260 00:11:15,383 --> 00:11:16,467 before the old folks come in 261 00:11:16,550 --> 00:11:17,551 for their morning walk. 262 00:11:19,053 --> 00:11:20,888 (feeble moaning) 263 00:11:20,971 --> 00:11:22,306 Open... 264 00:11:22,390 --> 00:11:24,058 Tapa-tapa-tapa. 265 00:11:24,141 --> 00:11:25,643 Tapa-tapa-tapa. 266 00:11:25,726 --> 00:11:27,895 -Oh, whoa! -Ow! 267 00:11:27,978 --> 00:11:30,690 Sorry. The floor's kind of at an angle here. 268 00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:32,108 I'm going to move over there. 269 00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:34,735 OK, from tapa-tapa-tapa. 270 00:11:36,779 --> 00:11:39,115 Wh... (groaning) 271 00:11:39,198 --> 00:11:41,492 Lisa's bad dancing makes my feet sad. 272 00:11:41,575 --> 00:11:42,993 (sighs exasperatedly) Let's take five. 273 00:11:44,245 --> 00:11:45,830 What am I doing wrong, Little Vicki? 274 00:11:45,913 --> 00:11:48,082 Well, you're falling a lot. 275 00:11:48,165 --> 00:11:50,876 -Maybe you should work on that. -Yeah, well, no offense, but maybe I need 276 00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:53,921 a little more instruction than just tapa-tapa-tapa. 277 00:11:54,004 --> 00:11:55,798 Why, back when I was your age, 278 00:11:55,881 --> 00:11:58,008 I had 43 movies under my belt, 279 00:11:58,092 --> 00:12:00,428 and I had to do it without tapa-tapa-tapa. 280 00:12:00,511 --> 00:12:02,471 I would've killed for tapa-tapa-tapa. 281 00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:04,348 Sorry. I'm just frustrated. 282 00:12:04,432 --> 00:12:05,850 Well, you'll never save 283 00:12:05,933 --> 00:12:07,935 Grampa's farm with that attitude. 284 00:12:08,018 --> 00:12:10,312 You've just got to turn that frown upside down. 285 00:12:11,272 --> 00:12:13,232 That's a smile, not an upside-down frown! 286 00:12:13,315 --> 00:12:14,483 Work on that, too. 287 00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:17,403 Hey, we got a postcard from Bart. 288 00:12:17,486 --> 00:12:18,821 "Dear Mom and Homer, 289 00:12:18,904 --> 00:12:20,114 I'm having fun." 290 00:12:20,197 --> 00:12:22,366 Aw, it sounds like he's having fun. 291 00:12:22,450 --> 00:12:24,785 Why does it have a picture of Vitamin Barn? 292 00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:27,496 Didn't you ever go to camp? 293 00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:29,832 The old Vitamin Barn. 294 00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:32,084 There's our Broadway baby! 295 00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:33,461 (groans) 296 00:12:33,544 --> 00:12:35,755 Hey, dig that crazy rhythm! 297 00:12:35,838 --> 00:12:37,339 I'm just walking. 298 00:12:37,715 --> 00:12:40,801 Listen, I know I said I wanted to be a dancer but-- 299 00:12:40,885 --> 00:12:42,553 And you will be a dancer. 300 00:12:42,636 --> 00:12:44,722 Look at you, all sugar and spice 301 00:12:44,805 --> 00:12:46,891 instead of equations and test tubes. 302 00:12:46,974 --> 00:12:49,977 Your daddy's precious dancing queen. 303 00:12:50,060 --> 00:12:52,563 -And you look adorable! -(groans) 304 00:12:52,646 --> 00:12:54,356 Now, honey, what were you trying to say 305 00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,984 before we kept interrupting with our loving proudness? 306 00:12:57,067 --> 00:12:58,819 Yes, our tiny tapper. 307 00:12:58,903 --> 00:13:00,237 What was it you were going to say 308 00:13:00,321 --> 00:13:02,573 after "I wanted to be a dancer, but..."? 309 00:13:02,656 --> 00:13:04,950 But I just 310 00:13:06,410 --> 00:13:08,829 need more practice. 311 00:13:09,413 --> 00:13:11,457 -See ya! -(tapping) 312 00:13:11,540 --> 00:13:13,501 Oh, what's that awful sound? 313 00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:15,336 -The furnace? -It's me! 314 00:13:15,419 --> 00:13:17,421 BOTH: Aww. 315 00:13:21,383 --> 00:13:23,761 Why is you so down, Little Miss Vicki? 316 00:13:23,844 --> 00:13:25,554 My kitty cat's sick 317 00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:28,224 and I'd be ever so sad if she should die. 318 00:13:28,307 --> 00:13:29,308 (coughing) 319 00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:32,645 Well, I'm no animal doctor, or nothing, 320 00:13:32,728 --> 00:13:34,271 but whenever I'm feeling poorly, 321 00:13:34,355 --> 00:13:35,856 you know what fixes me up? 322 00:13:35,940 --> 00:13:37,733 -Dancin'! -Dancin'? 323 00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:38,901 Dancin'. 324 00:13:41,779 --> 00:13:43,280 But I don't know how to dance. 325 00:13:43,364 --> 00:13:45,199 Oh, I'll show you how. 326 00:13:56,544 --> 00:13:58,504 There! Now you're gettin' it. 327 00:13:58,587 --> 00:14:01,298 Look at me, Powder Puff! I'm dancin'! 328 00:14:08,889 --> 00:14:11,767 (sighs) That cat dances better than I do. 329 00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:13,352 WIGGUM: We'll catch that mall rat. 330 00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:17,273 Sure hope this Acme kit works. 331 00:14:17,356 --> 00:14:18,941 Gosh, that cheese looks good. 332 00:14:19,024 --> 00:14:20,901 Think I could grab it before that anvil hits? 333 00:14:20,985 --> 00:14:22,695 {\an8}I don't know, Chief. It's a million to one. 334 00:14:22,778 --> 00:14:25,030 I like those odds. 335 00:14:25,948 --> 00:14:26,949 Ah! 336 00:14:27,783 --> 00:14:29,743 -(both snickering) -(Wiggum groans) 337 00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:32,788 {\an8}My mistake was grabbing the cheese. (groans) 338 00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:37,668 (humming) 339 00:14:38,168 --> 00:14:41,130 Professor Frink, will that spaceship be ready for the recital? 340 00:14:41,213 --> 00:14:44,425 I have visited the future, and yes, it will. (chuckles) 341 00:14:44,842 --> 00:14:47,511 OK, kids, tonight's the big night. 342 00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:49,597 Now, remember, the important thing is 343 00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:52,308 -to just dance flawlessly. -LISA: Excuse me. 344 00:14:52,391 --> 00:14:55,436 -Why isn't my name in the program? -It is, silly. 345 00:14:55,519 --> 00:14:57,187 You've got the most important part of all. 346 00:14:57,271 --> 00:14:58,522 "Curtain puller"? 347 00:14:58,606 --> 00:15:00,858 No one can see the show if the curtain isn't open. 348 00:15:00,941 --> 00:15:03,652 But... my parents are counting on seeing me dance 349 00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:05,988 And I've worked ever so hard. 350 00:15:06,071 --> 00:15:09,033 I'm sorry, Lisa, but giving everyone an equal part 351 00:15:09,116 --> 00:15:11,911 when they're clearly not equal is called what again, class? 352 00:15:11,994 --> 00:15:13,412 ALL: Communism! 353 00:15:13,495 --> 00:15:15,122 That's right. And I didn't tap 354 00:15:15,205 --> 00:15:16,582 all those morse-code messages 355 00:15:16,665 --> 00:15:18,417 to the allies till my shoes filled with blood 356 00:15:18,500 --> 00:15:20,461 just to roll out the welcome mat for the reds. 357 00:15:20,544 --> 00:15:22,171 (sighs) All right. 358 00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:25,132 I'll be the stupid curtain puller. (grunts) 359 00:15:26,842 --> 00:15:28,677 Smoothly. 360 00:15:28,761 --> 00:15:30,846 Pull-a, pull-a, pull-a. 361 00:15:31,472 --> 00:15:34,224 (grumbling) I got your "pull-a, pull-a, pull-a." 362 00:15:34,308 --> 00:15:36,644 Excuse me, Lisa, but I couldn't help but overhear 363 00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:38,020 your nerdly predicament. 364 00:15:38,103 --> 00:15:39,688 Maybe I can be of assistance 365 00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:40,981 with the dancing, and the twisting... 366 00:15:41,065 --> 00:15:42,816 ♪ And the kung fu fighting ♪ 367 00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:44,109 (scatting) 368 00:15:46,570 --> 00:15:48,113 I first observed this technology 369 00:15:48,197 --> 00:15:49,698 at the airport gift shop. 370 00:15:49,782 --> 00:15:51,033 -(clicking rhythmically) -As you see, 371 00:15:51,116 --> 00:15:52,993 it responds to any percussive sound 372 00:15:53,077 --> 00:15:54,286 with an exuberant shaking 373 00:15:54,370 --> 00:15:56,622 if it's groove-thing, yeah, yeah. 374 00:15:56,705 --> 00:15:58,666 It's most entertaining, but how does that help me? 375 00:15:58,749 --> 00:16:00,042 Observe. 376 00:16:06,924 --> 00:16:08,592 Ooh! 377 00:16:08,676 --> 00:16:11,929 That's brilliant, Professor. What will you think of next? 378 00:16:12,012 --> 00:16:14,515 {\an8}Well, I also found this at the gift shop. 379 00:16:14,598 --> 00:16:15,683 Isn't it cute? 380 00:16:16,392 --> 00:16:18,102 I'm hoping to turn it into a weapon. 381 00:16:18,185 --> 00:16:20,896 (laughing maniacally) It'll kill ya. 382 00:16:20,980 --> 00:16:22,314 I've got to go now. 383 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:29,238 OK, Mr. Rat, we've got a little playmate for you. 384 00:16:29,321 --> 00:16:31,240 -(snarling) -(clanks) 385 00:16:31,323 --> 00:16:33,033 Should I get the backup lion, Chief? 386 00:16:33,117 --> 00:16:34,243 Would you? 387 00:16:34,910 --> 00:16:37,371 (sniffing) 388 00:16:38,455 --> 00:16:40,290 (whispering) Can you see the lion anywhere? 389 00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:42,626 (growling) 390 00:16:43,502 --> 00:16:44,837 -(squeaking) -Well, do you see him or not? 391 00:16:44,920 --> 00:16:48,090 (squeaking) 392 00:16:48,173 --> 00:16:50,175 Are you saying he's right on the other side of that plant? 393 00:16:50,259 --> 00:16:51,677 (squeaking) 394 00:16:52,219 --> 00:16:54,388 -(growling) -OK. Run! 395 00:16:54,471 --> 00:16:57,349 -(roaring) -(both screaming) 396 00:16:58,183 --> 00:16:59,226 (both gasping) 397 00:16:59,309 --> 00:17:00,644 This way! 398 00:17:00,728 --> 00:17:03,313 (both panting) 399 00:17:03,397 --> 00:17:05,315 BOTH: Uh-oh. 400 00:17:06,358 --> 00:17:09,194 -(lion growling) -(both whimpering) 401 00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:10,863 -(roars) -(grunts) 402 00:17:13,323 --> 00:17:16,326 (purring) 403 00:17:16,410 --> 00:17:17,911 Bart, you're a genius. 404 00:17:17,995 --> 00:17:19,246 Ah! 405 00:17:22,166 --> 00:17:23,375 You OK, Milhouse? 406 00:17:23,459 --> 00:17:24,626 Nothing that a handful of 407 00:17:24,710 --> 00:17:26,295 Gummy Bears can't fix. 408 00:17:26,378 --> 00:17:28,297 (both laughing) 409 00:17:30,257 --> 00:17:32,760 Well, well, looks like the cat got the rat. 410 00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:35,512 And that's the end of that tale. 411 00:17:36,263 --> 00:17:38,182 Uh, Chief, should we try and get the mountain lion 412 00:17:38,265 --> 00:17:40,476 -back in its crate? -I repeat... 413 00:17:42,978 --> 00:17:44,104 OK, everyone, 414 00:17:44,188 --> 00:17:45,856 we need big smiles out there, 415 00:17:45,939 --> 00:17:47,441 so line up for dimpling. 416 00:17:47,524 --> 00:17:48,984 Now this may hurt a lot. 417 00:17:49,068 --> 00:17:50,736 -(gasps) -What am I saying, "may"? 418 00:17:50,819 --> 00:17:52,613 -(firing) -Ow! 419 00:17:52,696 --> 00:17:54,740 Now, that's a happy face. 420 00:17:54,823 --> 00:17:56,825 Little Vicki, I figured out how to dance. 421 00:17:56,909 --> 00:17:58,368 I can be in the show now. 422 00:17:58,452 --> 00:17:59,953 I'm sorry, Lisa. 423 00:18:00,037 --> 00:18:01,872 People go to a children's dance recital 424 00:18:01,955 --> 00:18:04,291 expecting a certain level of professionalism. 425 00:18:04,374 --> 00:18:05,959 But... But you don't understand. 426 00:18:06,043 --> 00:18:08,128 (groaning) 427 00:18:08,212 --> 00:18:10,547 I ate too much plastic candy. 428 00:18:10,631 --> 00:18:11,757 Heavens to Betsy! 429 00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:13,133 The star of the show is sick! 430 00:18:13,217 --> 00:18:14,885 Whatever will we do? 431 00:18:14,968 --> 00:18:17,179 There's only one person who can get us out of this pickle. 432 00:18:17,262 --> 00:18:18,722 -Lisa? -Yes? 433 00:18:18,806 --> 00:18:21,725 {\an8}-Help me into Ralph's costume. -(sighs) 434 00:18:21,809 --> 00:18:24,019 -(piano playing) -Show time, children. 435 00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:25,104 Let's go. 436 00:18:25,813 --> 00:18:26,897 OK, curtain puller, 437 00:18:26,980 --> 00:18:28,649 this is your moment to shine. 438 00:18:29,441 --> 00:18:31,068 {\an8}Oh, it's too important, I'll do it for you. 439 00:18:32,986 --> 00:18:34,238 (groans) 440 00:18:35,864 --> 00:18:38,033 Lean, muscular children of Mars, 441 00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:39,535 we bring you candy. 442 00:18:39,618 --> 00:18:42,329 (all giggling) 443 00:18:42,412 --> 00:18:44,665 Let's walk over to them. 444 00:18:44,748 --> 00:18:46,708 Why walk when you can dance? 445 00:18:50,212 --> 00:18:53,465 (all rhythmically tapping) 446 00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:55,008 Where's Lisa? 447 00:18:55,092 --> 00:18:57,845 Shh! This plot is hard enough to follow as it is. 448 00:18:57,928 --> 00:18:59,805 ♪ On the spaceship ♪ 449 00:18:59,888 --> 00:19:01,014 ALL: ♪ Lollipop ♪ 450 00:19:01,098 --> 00:19:02,724 ♪ Gingerbread men ♪ 451 00:19:02,808 --> 00:19:04,309 ♪ Like to do hip-hop ♪ 452 00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:06,687 -♪ And chocolate chips... ♪ -Huh? 453 00:19:06,770 --> 00:19:09,690 ♪ Make a rockin' fuel for rocket ships ♪ 454 00:19:10,566 --> 00:19:13,777 ♪ We just love to dance on Mars ♪ 455 00:19:13,861 --> 00:19:15,279 ♪ Where everything's made... ♪ 456 00:19:15,362 --> 00:19:17,990 There she is! Hi, honey! 457 00:19:18,073 --> 00:19:20,200 Wow! Look at her go! 458 00:19:20,284 --> 00:19:21,952 Yeah, that pressure we put on her 459 00:19:22,035 --> 00:19:23,203 really paid off. 460 00:19:30,335 --> 00:19:31,503 What are you doing? 461 00:19:31,587 --> 00:19:33,630 I can't help it, it's the shoes. 462 00:19:33,714 --> 00:19:36,466 Nobody upstages Little Vicki. (hissing) 463 00:19:43,056 --> 00:19:45,392 Oh... please stop. 464 00:19:45,475 --> 00:19:47,811 I'm just getting started! 465 00:19:49,229 --> 00:19:50,939 (audience gasping) 466 00:19:53,734 --> 00:19:56,653 (cheering and whistling) 467 00:19:56,737 --> 00:19:59,573 Stop clapping! Whoa! 468 00:19:59,656 --> 00:20:01,825 Wha...! Whoa! 469 00:20:02,618 --> 00:20:04,411 Go, Lisa! Come on, everybody, 470 00:20:04,494 --> 00:20:06,079 give it up for my little girl! 471 00:20:06,997 --> 00:20:09,333 -(girls screaming) -Whoa... 472 00:20:09,416 --> 00:20:11,168 Whoa... Please... 473 00:20:11,251 --> 00:20:13,337 Stop clapping! You'll kill us all! 474 00:20:13,420 --> 00:20:16,798 (screaming) 475 00:20:16,882 --> 00:20:19,593 (all screaming) 476 00:20:19,676 --> 00:20:21,136 Lisa's gone berserk! 477 00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:23,055 Do something, Homer! Do something! 478 00:20:23,138 --> 00:20:26,058 (yelping and groans) 479 00:20:26,141 --> 00:20:27,392 Oh, thanks, Dad. 480 00:20:27,476 --> 00:20:29,561 I didn't think, I... just acted. 481 00:20:30,687 --> 00:20:32,522 Self-tapping shoes? 482 00:20:32,606 --> 00:20:35,234 -I'm ever so pissed. -I'm sorry, Vicki. 483 00:20:35,317 --> 00:20:37,861 I just wanted to be a dancer so badly. 484 00:20:37,945 --> 00:20:39,821 (sighs) I understand. 485 00:20:39,905 --> 00:20:42,407 We all do crazy things when we're desperate. 486 00:20:42,491 --> 00:20:44,660 I once destroyed Buddy Ebsen's credit rating. 487 00:20:44,743 --> 00:20:46,536 -Why? -He knows why. 488 00:20:47,496 --> 00:20:49,039 Jesus, Mary and Glavin! 489 00:20:49,122 --> 00:20:50,666 These shoes are in the "off" position! 490 00:20:50,749 --> 00:20:52,626 You mean, I danced all by myself? 491 00:20:52,709 --> 00:20:55,170 See, honey? All you needed was to believe in-- 492 00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:56,755 What are you talking about, Professor Frink? 493 00:20:56,838 --> 00:20:59,967 They're clearly in the "on" position. See? "On." 494 00:21:00,050 --> 00:21:02,594 I was merely trying to spare the girl's feelings, 495 00:21:02,678 --> 00:21:05,722 -you insensitive clod. -Oh... Oh! 496 00:21:05,806 --> 00:21:08,308 Well, now that I look even closer-- 497 00:21:08,392 --> 00:21:10,018 Forget it, Dad. 498 00:21:10,102 --> 00:21:13,021 (groans) I guess I'm never going to be your Broadway baby. 499 00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:14,856 That's not true, honey. You can always write 500 00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:17,067 a depressing Broadway play of some kind. 501 00:21:17,150 --> 00:21:19,069 -You think so? -Sure. 502 00:21:19,152 --> 00:21:20,737 It could be a story about people 503 00:21:20,821 --> 00:21:22,739 coming to terms with things. 504 00:21:22,823 --> 00:21:25,575 Hey, yeah. You could load it up with lots of swears. 505 00:21:25,659 --> 00:21:26,785 That's what David Mamet does. 506 00:21:26,868 --> 00:21:28,954 Ah, I love you guys. 507 00:21:29,663 --> 00:21:32,541 Uh-oh! It's out of its matrix! Nobody move! 508 00:21:32,624 --> 00:21:34,793 Why, it's just a cute little weasel. 509 00:21:34,876 --> 00:21:36,920 (cooing) Hello, there, Mr. Weasel. 510 00:21:37,004 --> 00:21:40,924 -(loud zapping) -(Homer screaming) 511 00:21:41,008 --> 00:21:42,509 I'm down! 512 00:22:31,266 --> 00:22:33,268 {\an8}Captioned by Visual Data Media Services