1 00:00:02,460 --> 00:00:03,837 (thunder rumbling) 2 00:00:05,255 --> 00:00:06,840 (grunting) 3 00:00:06,923 --> 00:00:08,800 (theme music playing) 4 00:00:09,634 --> 00:00:11,344 (laughing) 5 00:00:13,346 --> 00:00:14,514 (grunts) 6 00:00:21,646 --> 00:00:22,772 Hmm. 7 00:00:28,862 --> 00:00:30,697 (laughing) 8 00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:01,269 {\an8}Hey, who cut out Beetle Bailey? 9 00:01:01,352 --> 00:01:02,937 {\an8}I need my Miss Buxley fix. 10 00:01:03,021 --> 00:01:05,231 {\an8}I don't like you ogling her. 11 00:01:05,315 --> 00:01:06,566 {\an8}Why don't you read Cathy? 12 00:01:06,649 --> 00:01:08,068 {\an8}She's hilarious. 13 00:01:08,151 --> 00:01:09,444 {\an8}Ah, too much baggage. 14 00:01:10,111 --> 00:01:11,529 {\an8}Ooh, my horoscope. 15 00:01:11,613 --> 00:01:13,990 {\an8}"Taurus: Today you will die." 16 00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:15,075 {\an8}-What? -(gasps) 17 00:01:15,158 --> 00:01:16,659 {\an8}"And you may get a compliment 18 00:01:16,743 --> 00:01:18,703 {\an8}from an attractive coworker." 19 00:01:18,787 --> 00:01:19,704 {\an8}Lenny? 20 00:01:19,788 --> 00:01:21,498 {\an8}It really says "die"? 21 00:01:21,581 --> 00:01:24,250 {\an8}That sounds unusually specific for a horoscope. 22 00:01:24,334 --> 00:01:26,628 {\an8}Mmm, maybe I better check mine. 23 00:01:26,961 --> 00:01:29,089 {\an8}"Today your husband will die." 24 00:01:29,172 --> 00:01:31,549 {\an8}(gasps) Homer, I'm scared. 25 00:01:31,633 --> 00:01:33,426 {\an8}Ooh, scary newspaper. 26 00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:35,011 {\an8}Don't hurt me, horoscope. 27 00:01:35,095 --> 00:01:37,180 {\an8}I'm afraid... Ow! Oh! 28 00:01:37,263 --> 00:01:38,515 {\an8}Paper cut! Paper cut! 29 00:01:41,935 --> 00:01:43,186 {\an8}(screams) 30 00:01:43,269 --> 00:01:44,187 {\an8}Missed me! 31 00:01:44,270 --> 00:01:45,688 {\an8}Stupid horoscope. 32 00:01:50,443 --> 00:01:53,571 {\an8}Ha-ha-ha... Stupid horoscope. 33 00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:55,281 {\an8}(rattling) 34 00:01:56,741 --> 00:01:57,575 {\an8}(grunts) 35 00:01:57,659 --> 00:01:58,701 {\an8}(chuckles) 36 00:01:58,785 --> 00:02:00,078 {\an8}Clupid bloropope. 37 00:02:03,289 --> 00:02:04,999 {\an8}Homer, if I may compliment you... 38 00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:06,960 {\an8}Yes, go on. 39 00:02:07,043 --> 00:02:09,003 {\an8}That is one handsome rattlesnake. 40 00:02:09,087 --> 00:02:10,130 {\an8}You got biting your arm there. 41 00:02:10,213 --> 00:02:11,339 {\an8}Yeah, that's quite fetching. 42 00:02:11,422 --> 00:02:12,507 {\an8}But, uh, aren't you worried 43 00:02:12,590 --> 00:02:13,633 {\an8}about the deadliness? 44 00:02:13,716 --> 00:02:15,009 {\an8}No, he'll get tired of biting 45 00:02:15,093 --> 00:02:16,177 {\an8}in an hour or so. 46 00:02:16,803 --> 00:02:18,596 {\an8}Snakes, nature's quitters. 47 00:02:20,306 --> 00:02:21,850 {\an8}That horoscope was baloney. 48 00:02:21,933 --> 00:02:23,977 {\an8}Nothing happened except for the pickax in my head, 49 00:02:24,060 --> 00:02:26,146 {\an8}the rattlesnake bite and the testicle thing. 50 00:02:26,229 --> 00:02:27,147 {\an8}What's for dessert? 51 00:02:27,230 --> 00:02:28,481 {\an8}No dessert until you eat 52 00:02:28,565 --> 00:02:29,649 {\an8}your broccoli. 53 00:02:29,732 --> 00:02:31,276 {\an8}Oh... fine. 54 00:02:32,902 --> 00:02:34,070 (grunts) 55 00:02:38,658 --> 00:02:41,411 Mm, another broccoli-related death. 56 00:02:41,494 --> 00:02:42,495 But I thought broccoli was... 57 00:02:42,579 --> 00:02:44,455 Oh, yes, one of the deadliest 58 00:02:44,539 --> 00:02:45,915 plants on earth. Why, 59 00:02:45,999 --> 00:02:47,083 it tries to warn you itself 60 00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:48,585 with its terrible taste. 61 00:02:49,752 --> 00:02:51,462 Sure is easy when they're stiff like this... 62 00:02:53,214 --> 00:02:54,257 and very sad. 63 00:03:01,973 --> 00:03:03,099 HOMER: St. Peter. 64 00:03:03,183 --> 00:03:04,434 Whoo-hoo! 65 00:03:04,517 --> 00:03:07,187 Got to heaven before you, Flanders! 66 00:03:07,562 --> 00:03:09,522 (mocking grunts) 67 00:03:09,606 --> 00:03:12,192 I wouldn't celebrate so soon, Mr. Simpson. 68 00:03:12,275 --> 00:03:15,445 I don't see a single good deed next to your name. 69 00:03:15,778 --> 00:03:17,989 Well, the thing about that is... 70 00:03:19,949 --> 00:03:21,409 (screams) 71 00:03:22,118 --> 00:03:23,620 Homer, settle down. 72 00:03:23,703 --> 00:03:25,830 I'll give you a chance to get into heaven. 73 00:03:25,914 --> 00:03:28,166 You have 24 hours to go back 74 00:03:28,249 --> 00:03:30,126 and do one good deed. 75 00:03:30,210 --> 00:03:32,587 I'm sorry, I didn't get the number of hours or good deeds. 76 00:03:33,630 --> 00:03:36,507 (yells) 77 00:03:36,925 --> 00:03:39,594 Oh, Homie, I still can't believe 78 00:03:39,677 --> 00:03:41,596 a piece of broccoli killed you. 79 00:03:42,764 --> 00:03:44,557 What the hell was I thinking? 80 00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:47,185 (gasps) 81 00:03:52,148 --> 00:03:53,566 I tried the broccoli again. 82 00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:56,611 Uh. You have 23 hours left. 83 00:03:56,694 --> 00:03:57,820 (yells) 84 00:04:00,114 --> 00:04:01,824 (wind howling) 85 00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:04,577 (ghost-like voice) Marge Simpson... 86 00:04:05,161 --> 00:04:06,663 Homer, it's you! 87 00:04:06,746 --> 00:04:08,539 I thought I'd never see you again. 88 00:04:08,623 --> 00:04:10,208 You were wrong. 89 00:04:10,291 --> 00:04:11,960 Dead wrong! 90 00:04:12,043 --> 00:04:13,753 Do you have to talk like that? 91 00:04:14,087 --> 00:04:15,046 (normal voice) No, not really. 92 00:04:15,129 --> 00:04:16,089 Marge, you got to help me. 93 00:04:16,172 --> 00:04:17,090 I have to do one good deed 94 00:04:17,173 --> 00:04:18,216 to get into heaven. 95 00:04:18,299 --> 00:04:20,468 Well, I've got a whole list of chores. 96 00:04:20,551 --> 00:04:21,678 "Clean the garage, 97 00:04:21,761 --> 00:04:22,762 paint the house, grout the--" 98 00:04:22,845 --> 00:04:23,763 Whoa, whoa, whoa. 99 00:04:23,846 --> 00:04:24,847 I'm just trying to get in. 100 00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:26,266 I'm not running for Jesus. 101 00:04:26,808 --> 00:04:28,393 OK, good deed. Good deed. 102 00:04:28,476 --> 00:04:29,644 Hello. 103 00:04:32,188 --> 00:04:33,231 (horn honking) 104 00:04:33,314 --> 00:04:35,358 BOY SCOUTS: Hey, a chance for a good deed. 105 00:04:38,027 --> 00:04:39,028 No, she's mine! 106 00:04:39,862 --> 00:04:41,072 Oh, my Lord-- 107 00:04:41,155 --> 00:04:43,616 Wh-what's happening to me? 108 00:04:43,700 --> 00:04:45,785 People can see up my bustle. 109 00:04:45,868 --> 00:04:47,245 Hey, stop squirming. 110 00:04:47,328 --> 00:04:48,371 (yells) 111 00:04:48,454 --> 00:04:49,455 (loud splat) 112 00:04:49,539 --> 00:04:50,456 Uh-oh. 113 00:04:50,540 --> 00:04:51,833 Uh... I'm pretty sure 114 00:04:51,916 --> 00:04:53,835 she was going to be the next Hitler. 115 00:04:54,377 --> 00:04:56,254 Hello? Good deed done. 116 00:04:57,880 --> 00:04:58,923 (bell rings) 117 00:04:59,841 --> 00:05:01,092 Let's see... Good deed. 118 00:05:01,592 --> 00:05:02,677 (yells) 119 00:05:03,219 --> 00:05:04,387 (screams) 120 00:05:04,470 --> 00:05:05,930 Got to find a good deed. 121 00:05:06,014 --> 00:05:07,515 (groaning and laughing) 122 00:05:07,598 --> 00:05:08,599 Bingo! 123 00:05:08,683 --> 00:05:10,059 ♪ Your daddy's dead ♪ 124 00:05:10,143 --> 00:05:11,769 ♪ Mine's just in jail ♪ 125 00:05:12,395 --> 00:05:15,565 Nelson... 126 00:05:15,648 --> 00:05:17,358 Huh? Who said that? 127 00:05:17,442 --> 00:05:18,735 I am the ghost of... 128 00:05:18,818 --> 00:05:19,736 Gotcha. 129 00:05:19,819 --> 00:05:20,903 (laughing) 130 00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:22,405 {\an8}Bart, help! 131 00:05:22,739 --> 00:05:24,741 {\an8}(yelling and moaning) 132 00:05:28,119 --> 00:05:29,829 Just one minute left to get into heaven. 133 00:05:29,912 --> 00:05:31,873 There's got to be some good deed I can do. 134 00:05:32,206 --> 00:05:34,083 Come on. Think. Think! 135 00:05:37,879 --> 00:05:39,339 -My baby! -(baby crying) 136 00:05:39,422 --> 00:05:40,548 Stop that crying. 137 00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:44,177 Man, you're annoying. 138 00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:51,601 Oh, it's a miracle! 139 00:05:51,684 --> 00:05:52,602 Thank heavens. 140 00:05:52,685 --> 00:05:53,686 HOMER: Whoo-hoo! 141 00:05:55,688 --> 00:05:56,606 Did you see that? 142 00:05:56,689 --> 00:05:58,274 I did the deed! Open up! 143 00:05:58,358 --> 00:05:59,400 Oh, I'm so sorry. 144 00:05:59,484 --> 00:06:00,610 I wasn't looking. 145 00:06:01,069 --> 00:06:03,363 Hey, I thought you guys could see everything. 146 00:06:03,446 --> 00:06:05,114 No, you're thinking of Santa Claus. 147 00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,699 Well, I'll be damned. 148 00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:08,159 I'm afraid so, yes. 149 00:06:08,242 --> 00:06:09,494 (screaming) 150 00:06:09,952 --> 00:06:12,538 (screaming) 151 00:06:13,498 --> 00:06:15,333 (whimpering) 152 00:06:15,792 --> 00:06:19,003 I am Homer Simpson. 153 00:06:19,087 --> 00:06:20,338 Silence, sinner! 154 00:06:20,421 --> 00:06:22,131 Prepare for an eternity 155 00:06:22,215 --> 00:06:24,217 of horrible pain! 156 00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:25,843 (whimpering) 157 00:06:26,469 --> 00:06:27,678 Ha-ha. 158 00:06:27,762 --> 00:06:30,306 (screaming and crying) 159 00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:31,474 Oh, be quiet. 160 00:06:31,557 --> 00:06:32,850 You'll wake up John Wayne. 161 00:06:33,351 --> 00:06:35,103 I'm already up. 162 00:06:41,150 --> 00:06:44,070 {\an8}(buzzing) 163 00:06:44,529 --> 00:06:46,823 Son, I don't like you watching that fire. 164 00:06:46,906 --> 00:06:48,032 It's too violent. 165 00:06:48,366 --> 00:06:49,867 (explosion) 166 00:06:49,951 --> 00:06:51,702 (laughing) 167 00:06:51,786 --> 00:06:53,454 You're missing the best part, sister. 168 00:06:53,538 --> 00:06:54,705 Forget that stupid book. 169 00:06:54,789 --> 00:06:56,249 But these fairy tales take me away 170 00:06:56,332 --> 00:06:58,084 from the harsh reality of peasant life. 171 00:06:58,167 --> 00:06:59,377 Aw, it's not so bad. 172 00:07:00,294 --> 00:07:01,295 Ow! 173 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:04,507 Oh, I just got over the plague. 174 00:07:05,466 --> 00:07:06,509 Hello, wife. 175 00:07:06,592 --> 00:07:07,760 Hello, children. 176 00:07:09,011 --> 00:07:10,430 Who's up for a merry jig? 177 00:07:10,888 --> 00:07:13,057 Do-de-do, do-de-do... 178 00:07:13,141 --> 00:07:14,267 Ow! 179 00:07:14,350 --> 00:07:15,893 Oh, who am I kidding? 180 00:07:15,977 --> 00:07:17,019 I'm not merry. 181 00:07:19,272 --> 00:07:20,898 I lost my job as an oaf today. 182 00:07:20,982 --> 00:07:21,941 What? 183 00:07:22,024 --> 00:07:23,526 Oh, why are the oafs 184 00:07:23,609 --> 00:07:25,570 always the first to go? 185 00:07:25,653 --> 00:07:27,029 {\an8}Maybe you could be a dunce, father. 186 00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:28,739 {\an8}-Really? -Hey! 187 00:07:31,909 --> 00:07:32,910 What do you think? 188 00:07:32,994 --> 00:07:34,078 Do you love it? 189 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,330 (screams) Oh, oh! 190 00:07:37,248 --> 00:07:38,791 Oh, I'm no dunce. 191 00:07:38,875 --> 00:07:41,085 I was born an oaf and I'll die an oaf. 192 00:07:41,169 --> 00:07:43,421 But, husband, without your weekly pittance, 193 00:07:43,504 --> 00:07:44,881 how shall we feed our children? 194 00:07:45,256 --> 00:07:46,257 Don't worry. 195 00:07:46,340 --> 00:07:48,926 {\an8}No child will ever starve in my home. 196 00:07:49,343 --> 00:07:50,386 So long kids. 197 00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:52,930 -(kids scream) -Enjoy your new home! 198 00:07:54,390 --> 00:07:56,309 Say hi to your other brother and sister. 199 00:07:56,392 --> 00:07:57,560 (both grunt) 200 00:07:57,935 --> 00:07:59,687 Other brother and sister? 201 00:07:59,770 --> 00:08:01,230 (both scream) 202 00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:03,399 Face it, they're not great parents. 203 00:08:06,110 --> 00:08:08,237 No! That bridge has a troll under it. 204 00:08:08,321 --> 00:08:09,322 -Yah! -Yah! 205 00:08:09,405 --> 00:08:11,574 Everything in this forest is from a fairy tale. 206 00:08:11,657 --> 00:08:14,368 And this book can keep us one step ahead. 207 00:08:16,037 --> 00:08:18,498 Ah Jeez, I came on too strong again. 208 00:08:18,581 --> 00:08:20,500 Oh, I'm so desperately lonely. 209 00:08:21,209 --> 00:08:22,543 (owl hooting) 210 00:08:25,463 --> 00:08:26,422 Hello! 211 00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:28,090 Lost lovable orphans! 212 00:08:28,799 --> 00:08:30,176 -(creaking) -(gasps) 213 00:08:34,388 --> 00:08:37,058 Hmm, bowls of porridge. 214 00:08:37,141 --> 00:08:39,435 Oh, this seems somehow familiar. 215 00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:40,520 Let's see. 216 00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:41,938 Hmm... 217 00:08:42,021 --> 00:08:43,231 Oh, whoa, too hot. 218 00:08:44,815 --> 00:08:45,983 Oh, too cold. 219 00:08:46,692 --> 00:08:47,860 Well, this doesn't take a genius. 220 00:08:50,446 --> 00:08:51,405 (gasp) 221 00:08:51,489 --> 00:08:53,407 We're in the Three Bears' house! 222 00:08:53,491 --> 00:08:54,700 (creaking) 223 00:08:54,784 --> 00:08:56,327 (gasps) 224 00:08:56,410 --> 00:08:58,412 (humming) 225 00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:02,416 (slam) 226 00:09:03,084 --> 00:09:05,211 (panting) 227 00:09:05,294 --> 00:09:06,462 That was close. 228 00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,422 I wonder where Goldilocks was? 229 00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:10,091 (yawning) 230 00:09:10,174 --> 00:09:13,886 Oh, that bed was just right. 231 00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:14,971 Gah! 232 00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:16,514 Oh, no! 233 00:09:16,597 --> 00:09:17,807 (bears roaring) 234 00:09:17,890 --> 00:09:19,100 (pounding) 235 00:09:19,183 --> 00:09:21,185 (Goldilocks screaming) 236 00:09:21,269 --> 00:09:22,770 (moaning) 237 00:09:27,024 --> 00:09:28,818 Boy, dumping your kids in the forest 238 00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:30,611 sure gets your hands dusty. 239 00:09:30,695 --> 00:09:31,612 What? 240 00:09:31,696 --> 00:09:32,947 You threw our precious babies 241 00:09:33,030 --> 00:09:34,198 into the woods? 242 00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:35,533 We could have sold them. 243 00:09:36,617 --> 00:09:37,994 Go back and get them. 244 00:09:38,077 --> 00:09:39,453 Here's a better idea. 245 00:09:39,537 --> 00:09:41,789 I know how we can replace those children. 246 00:09:41,872 --> 00:09:42,873 (purrs) 247 00:09:43,249 --> 00:09:44,375 Son! 248 00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:45,418 Daughter! 249 00:09:45,501 --> 00:09:47,295 I'm ever so sorry! 250 00:09:47,628 --> 00:09:51,841 (woman la-la-ing to tune of "Greensleeves") 251 00:09:53,092 --> 00:09:55,386 Brave sir knight, I pray you! 252 00:09:55,469 --> 00:09:57,096 Climb up and rescue me! 253 00:09:59,557 --> 00:10:01,017 Hmm. Hmm. 254 00:10:01,100 --> 00:10:02,893 Ow! No, wait! 255 00:10:02,977 --> 00:10:03,978 Wait! 256 00:10:04,061 --> 00:10:05,980 -(ripping) -D'oh! 257 00:10:06,397 --> 00:10:07,648 (groans) 258 00:10:10,651 --> 00:10:11,652 (whistling) 259 00:10:12,153 --> 00:10:14,697 Wow, a house made of gingerbread. 260 00:10:15,781 --> 00:10:17,783 Come on in, my darlings. 261 00:10:17,867 --> 00:10:19,869 The best candies are inside. 262 00:10:20,286 --> 00:10:21,787 Wait. Let me check the book. 263 00:10:22,204 --> 00:10:23,748 (cackling) 264 00:10:24,081 --> 00:10:25,458 Aw, she seems nice. 265 00:10:25,541 --> 00:10:26,834 I'm going to go with my gut and trust her. 266 00:10:26,917 --> 00:10:28,044 You're probably right. 267 00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:32,256 (cackling) 268 00:10:32,715 --> 00:10:35,217 Sweep faster. It's almost time for your beating. 269 00:10:36,218 --> 00:10:38,387 Oh, this is horrible. 270 00:10:38,471 --> 00:10:39,680 Horribly delicious. 271 00:10:39,764 --> 00:10:40,806 (chomping) 272 00:10:40,890 --> 00:10:42,600 You know, she's only fattening you up 273 00:10:42,683 --> 00:10:43,809 so she can eat you. 274 00:10:43,893 --> 00:10:45,019 Ah, what are you going to do? 275 00:10:47,146 --> 00:10:49,649 Well, at least stop basting yourself. 276 00:10:49,732 --> 00:10:51,567 Stop your chattering and sweep! 277 00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:53,527 -This house is filthy. -So what do you care? 278 00:10:53,611 --> 00:10:54,695 It's not like you have friends. 279 00:10:54,779 --> 00:10:56,238 I have a boyfriend. 280 00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:57,657 -Yeah, right. -Sure. 281 00:10:57,740 --> 00:10:58,949 What? I do! 282 00:10:59,033 --> 00:11:00,660 Oh, yeah? What's his name? 283 00:11:00,743 --> 00:11:02,370 Uh, George... 284 00:11:03,245 --> 00:11:04,205 Cauldron. 285 00:11:04,288 --> 00:11:06,040 George Cauldron? 286 00:11:06,123 --> 00:11:08,668 Maybe he can fix me up with Ed Ladle. 287 00:11:08,751 --> 00:11:10,461 (laughing) 288 00:11:10,544 --> 00:11:11,629 That's it! 289 00:11:11,712 --> 00:11:12,588 Into the oven with you! 290 00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:14,006 No! (screaming) 291 00:11:14,090 --> 00:11:16,258 Oh, no! 292 00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:17,802 -Ah! -What? 293 00:11:19,178 --> 00:11:21,639 Mmm, sugar walls. 294 00:11:21,722 --> 00:11:23,974 {\an8}Father, I knew you'd rescue us! 295 00:11:24,058 --> 00:11:26,769 Hmm. Rescue you, stuff myself with candy, it's all good. 296 00:11:28,896 --> 00:11:31,273 Oh, that's a load-bearing candy cane! 297 00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:32,608 You clumsy oaf! 298 00:11:33,567 --> 00:11:34,652 D'oh! 299 00:11:35,820 --> 00:11:37,363 (whimpering) 300 00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:39,740 (gasps) 301 00:11:40,241 --> 00:11:41,242 Hyah! 302 00:11:41,617 --> 00:11:43,411 (shouts) Ooh! 303 00:11:43,828 --> 00:11:45,413 (shouts) 304 00:11:46,038 --> 00:11:47,081 (gasps) 305 00:11:47,915 --> 00:11:48,999 That all you got? 306 00:11:49,083 --> 00:11:50,209 Huh, huh? 307 00:11:50,292 --> 00:11:52,586 (grunting and groaning) 308 00:11:52,670 --> 00:11:54,046 (sniffing) 309 00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:55,172 Hmm, fish. 310 00:11:55,631 --> 00:11:57,049 Oh, no, that's me! Agh! 311 00:11:57,133 --> 00:11:58,050 Come on. Get me out of here! 312 00:11:58,134 --> 00:11:59,051 (speaking indistinctly) 313 00:11:59,135 --> 00:12:00,219 (doorbell ringing) 314 00:12:00,302 --> 00:12:01,762 Just a minute! 315 00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:03,389 (grunting) 316 00:12:04,932 --> 00:12:06,100 (screaming) 317 00:12:06,183 --> 00:12:08,102 WITCH: Oh, god, no! 318 00:12:08,519 --> 00:12:09,729 Let me out! 319 00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:11,856 I couldn't be in more pain! 320 00:12:11,939 --> 00:12:13,232 (screaming) 321 00:12:13,315 --> 00:12:15,609 (crackling) 322 00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:18,112 (sighs) 323 00:12:18,696 --> 00:12:20,406 Er, hello, I'm George Cauldron. 324 00:12:20,489 --> 00:12:21,949 Is Suzanne ready yet? 325 00:12:22,032 --> 00:12:23,909 Almost, just give her another 20 minutes. 326 00:12:25,035 --> 00:12:26,704 (laughing) 327 00:12:26,787 --> 00:12:28,080 But the concert's at 8:00. 328 00:12:29,498 --> 00:12:31,125 (chomping) 329 00:12:31,208 --> 00:12:32,543 Well, we're still poor 330 00:12:32,626 --> 00:12:33,919 but thanks to your father, 331 00:12:34,003 --> 00:12:35,546 we'll never go hungry. 332 00:12:35,629 --> 00:12:37,548 Speaking of which, how about seconds? 333 00:12:37,631 --> 00:12:38,591 Coming up. 334 00:12:38,674 --> 00:12:40,050 (humming) 335 00:12:40,134 --> 00:12:44,805 (panting, straining) 336 00:12:44,889 --> 00:12:46,098 D'oh! 337 00:12:58,277 --> 00:13:00,863 (crowd speaking indistinctly) 338 00:13:01,197 --> 00:13:03,240 Let's give Snorky a big hand. 339 00:13:03,324 --> 00:13:05,701 -(applause) -Whoo! Yay, Snorky! 340 00:13:05,785 --> 00:13:08,537 Now, we're going to need a volunteer to frolic with Snorky 341 00:13:08,621 --> 00:13:09,955 so raise your hand if you want to be-- 342 00:13:10,372 --> 00:13:12,500 (clamoring) 343 00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:16,837 (shrieks, whines) 344 00:13:17,505 --> 00:13:18,881 Oh, Snorky. 345 00:13:19,340 --> 00:13:21,133 MAN: Folks, we're heating up the lobster tank 346 00:13:21,217 --> 00:13:22,218 so hurry on over 347 00:13:22,301 --> 00:13:23,511 if you want to pet 'em 348 00:13:23,594 --> 00:13:24,637 before you eat 'em. 349 00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:26,514 (indistinct chatter) 350 00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:28,516 It's OK. They're gone now. 351 00:13:28,599 --> 00:13:29,517 You can... 352 00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:30,810 Hey, where you going? 353 00:13:31,769 --> 00:13:34,688 (chittering, dolphins calling) 354 00:13:37,191 --> 00:13:38,484 (chittering) 355 00:13:38,567 --> 00:13:40,986 Oh. You want to be with your friends. 356 00:13:43,572 --> 00:13:44,615 Um... 357 00:13:44,949 --> 00:13:46,033 (squeaks) 358 00:13:46,116 --> 00:13:47,201 Oh... 359 00:13:50,955 --> 00:13:53,541 (alarm buzzing) 360 00:13:53,624 --> 00:13:54,625 It's getting away. 361 00:13:54,708 --> 00:13:55,751 Kill it! 362 00:13:56,585 --> 00:13:57,503 Go on. 363 00:13:57,586 --> 00:13:58,963 Swim to freedom. Go! 364 00:14:00,631 --> 00:14:02,049 (guns cocking) 365 00:14:05,636 --> 00:14:07,096 Ahh! 366 00:14:07,179 --> 00:14:08,597 (chittering) 367 00:14:10,432 --> 00:14:11,559 Ahh! 368 00:14:12,893 --> 00:14:15,896 Ew, yech! 369 00:14:20,568 --> 00:14:21,986 (chittering) 370 00:14:22,653 --> 00:14:24,405 (squeaking) 371 00:14:25,406 --> 00:14:28,367 {\an8}(chittering) 372 00:14:28,826 --> 00:14:32,204 {\an8}(squeaking) 373 00:14:34,665 --> 00:14:37,459 {\an8}(continues squeaking) 374 00:14:46,927 --> 00:14:49,930 Mmm. Alcohol and night swimming. 375 00:14:50,014 --> 00:14:51,432 It's a winning combination. 376 00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:58,105 Uh-oh. Sharks. 377 00:14:58,188 --> 00:14:59,690 The assassins of the sea. 378 00:15:00,232 --> 00:15:02,318 -(chittering) -Ooh. Hey, you're not sharks. 379 00:15:02,401 --> 00:15:03,569 You're dolphins. 380 00:15:03,652 --> 00:15:05,237 The clowns of the sea. 381 00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:07,615 Ow! Ow! 382 00:15:07,698 --> 00:15:09,033 Hey, what's the gag? 383 00:15:11,285 --> 00:15:14,121 (shrieking) Ow! 384 00:15:19,877 --> 00:15:21,503 Hmm. Bottlenose bruises. 385 00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:22,630 Blowhole burns. 386 00:15:23,088 --> 00:15:24,048 Flipper prints. 387 00:15:24,131 --> 00:15:26,300 This looks like the work of rowdy teens. 388 00:15:26,383 --> 00:15:27,551 Lou, cancel the prom. 389 00:15:30,763 --> 00:15:32,973 Yarrgh. It begins. 390 00:15:33,057 --> 00:15:34,850 The dolphins are upon us 391 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,894 and only this old sea dog 392 00:15:36,977 --> 00:15:39,271 knows how to stop the... Yarrgh! 393 00:15:42,358 --> 00:15:45,152 {\an8}Ar. Arr! 394 00:15:45,235 --> 00:15:47,738 {\an8}(laughing) 395 00:15:51,951 --> 00:15:53,410 (squeaking) 396 00:16:03,754 --> 00:16:05,047 (chittering) 397 00:16:08,842 --> 00:16:10,094 {\an8}(squeaking) 398 00:16:15,683 --> 00:16:17,351 (chanting) 399 00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:19,728 (repeating chanting) 400 00:16:23,524 --> 00:16:25,442 {\an8}(whining) 401 00:16:26,652 --> 00:16:27,695 (whimpers) 402 00:16:30,739 --> 00:16:33,575 HOMER: Two krusty shakes, a doughnut burger with cheese 403 00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:36,120 and a party-size bucket of flan. 404 00:16:36,203 --> 00:16:38,539 (dolphin chittering) 405 00:16:38,622 --> 00:16:40,082 Yes, I will have fries with that. 406 00:16:40,165 --> 00:16:41,667 -(engine revving) -(tires screeching) 407 00:16:44,920 --> 00:16:47,464 Huh. Anything to get out of work. 408 00:16:48,966 --> 00:16:51,468 Our top story-- killer dolphins. 409 00:16:51,552 --> 00:16:52,678 Kill dolphins? 410 00:16:52,761 --> 00:16:54,513 The recent wave of murders... 411 00:16:54,596 --> 00:16:55,681 (man shrieks) 412 00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:57,391 (groans) 413 00:16:58,642 --> 00:17:01,520 Um... Di... Did I say "killer dolphins"? 414 00:17:01,603 --> 00:17:03,897 I meant killer... Italians. 415 00:17:03,981 --> 00:17:07,276 Great, bottlenose, intelligent Italians. 416 00:17:07,359 --> 00:17:08,902 Intelligent Italians? 417 00:17:08,986 --> 00:17:10,154 Something's wrong. 418 00:17:10,237 --> 00:17:11,280 It's dolphins. 419 00:17:11,363 --> 00:17:12,614 We have to stop them. 420 00:17:12,698 --> 00:17:14,324 If we speak in low-frequency voices 421 00:17:14,408 --> 00:17:15,826 I don't think they can... 422 00:17:15,909 --> 00:17:16,910 Ow! 423 00:17:18,996 --> 00:17:19,997 (all gasping) 424 00:17:20,330 --> 00:17:22,041 Those dolphins seem bent on mayhem. 425 00:17:22,374 --> 00:17:23,834 We've got to warn grampa. 426 00:17:26,962 --> 00:17:27,880 (busy signal) 427 00:17:27,963 --> 00:17:29,423 Hmm. Phone's off the hook. 428 00:17:29,506 --> 00:17:30,758 Everything must be OK. 429 00:17:30,841 --> 00:17:32,051 (straining) 430 00:17:34,845 --> 00:17:37,806 Oh, I'm going to give your liver such a punching! 431 00:17:37,890 --> 00:17:39,141 (murmuring) 432 00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:40,684 (banging gavel) 433 00:17:40,768 --> 00:17:41,810 People, please. 434 00:17:42,311 --> 00:17:43,937 We're all frightened and horny, 435 00:17:44,313 --> 00:17:46,356 but we can't let some killer dolphins 436 00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:48,609 keep us from living and scoring. 437 00:17:48,692 --> 00:17:50,152 (squeaking) 438 00:17:50,235 --> 00:17:51,779 (all gasping) 439 00:17:51,862 --> 00:17:53,072 (squeaking) 440 00:17:53,405 --> 00:17:54,948 Willie, must you do that now? 441 00:17:55,032 --> 00:17:56,617 Ugh. You want streaks? 442 00:17:56,700 --> 00:17:58,827 'Cause if you interrupt me, that's what you'll get. 443 00:17:58,911 --> 00:17:59,912 Och. 444 00:18:02,414 --> 00:18:04,291 -(guns cocking) -(gasping) 445 00:18:04,374 --> 00:18:05,584 (all gasping) 446 00:18:08,295 --> 00:18:09,880 (chittering) 447 00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:15,636 {\an8}It's approaching the podium. 448 00:18:15,719 --> 00:18:17,221 {\an8}Surely it cannot speak. 449 00:18:18,305 --> 00:18:20,474 Snorky... talk... 450 00:18:21,433 --> 00:18:22,518 man... 451 00:18:22,601 --> 00:18:23,811 (clearing throat) 452 00:18:24,728 --> 00:18:25,854 I'm sorry, let me start over. 453 00:18:26,647 --> 00:18:29,316 Eons ago, dolphins lived on the land. 454 00:18:29,399 --> 00:18:31,026 -(gasping) -What did he say? 455 00:18:31,110 --> 00:18:32,069 He said dolphins used 456 00:18:32,152 --> 00:18:33,237 to live on the land. 457 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:34,446 What? 458 00:18:34,530 --> 00:18:36,281 Then your ancestors 459 00:18:36,365 --> 00:18:37,616 drove us into the sea 460 00:18:38,033 --> 00:18:40,160 where we've suffered for millions of years. 461 00:18:40,244 --> 00:18:42,371 {\an8}But you seemed so happy in the ocean. 462 00:18:42,454 --> 00:18:44,498 All that playful leaping. 463 00:18:44,581 --> 00:18:45,666 We were trying to get out. 464 00:18:45,749 --> 00:18:47,000 It's cold, it's wet. 465 00:18:47,084 --> 00:18:48,877 Every morning I wake up phlegmy. 466 00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:50,587 That's all that sewage we keep dumping. 467 00:18:50,671 --> 00:18:51,713 (gasps) That was you? 468 00:18:51,797 --> 00:18:52,923 It was her all right. 469 00:18:53,006 --> 00:18:54,800 Take the one who wronged you. 470 00:18:54,883 --> 00:18:59,471 I, King Snorky, hereby banish all humans to the sea. 471 00:18:59,555 --> 00:19:00,556 (gasping) 472 00:19:01,682 --> 00:19:02,724 Yeah! 473 00:19:03,183 --> 00:19:04,226 (indistinct chatter) 474 00:19:04,309 --> 00:19:05,352 KRUSTY: Pushy dolphins. 475 00:19:05,435 --> 00:19:06,436 (indistinct chatter) 476 00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:08,564 I-I tuned out. W-where we going? 477 00:19:08,647 --> 00:19:09,690 Wait. Stop. 478 00:19:09,773 --> 00:19:11,191 We can outsmart those dolphins. 479 00:19:11,275 --> 00:19:13,527 Don't forget, we invented computers, 480 00:19:13,610 --> 00:19:16,029 leg-warmers, bendy straws, peel-and-eat shrimp, 481 00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:18,615 the glory hole, and the pudding cup. 482 00:19:18,699 --> 00:19:22,411 I'm not going to let a few hoop-jumping tuna-munchers 483 00:19:22,494 --> 00:19:23,745 push me around! 484 00:19:23,829 --> 00:19:24,788 (grunts) 485 00:19:24,872 --> 00:19:25,789 Uh-oh. 486 00:19:25,873 --> 00:19:26,915 (all gasping) 487 00:19:29,626 --> 00:19:30,502 (squeaks) 488 00:19:37,092 --> 00:19:40,888 Jeez, so many dolphins. 489 00:19:45,809 --> 00:19:47,144 (squeaking) 490 00:19:53,066 --> 00:19:56,653 -(whimpers) -Oh, no, you poor thing... 491 00:19:57,196 --> 00:19:58,697 Here... Ow! 492 00:19:58,780 --> 00:20:00,782 -Son of a-- -Hey, leave my daughter alone. 493 00:20:01,325 --> 00:20:02,492 Come on, humans. 494 00:20:02,576 --> 00:20:04,912 We've wiped out entire species before, 495 00:20:04,995 --> 00:20:05,996 we can do it again! 496 00:20:06,371 --> 00:20:07,456 Yeah! 497 00:20:08,248 --> 00:20:09,374 Get 'em! 498 00:20:09,458 --> 00:20:11,043 (punches landing) 499 00:20:11,835 --> 00:20:14,004 (grunting and groaning) 500 00:20:14,922 --> 00:20:17,799 Ah! Oh! Ah! Oh! Help! 501 00:20:19,218 --> 00:20:20,385 Ooh! If I could just... 502 00:20:20,469 --> 00:20:21,845 Ooh! This is really not... Ooh! 503 00:20:21,929 --> 00:20:22,971 You're hurting my... Ooh! 504 00:20:23,055 --> 00:20:23,972 Ow! 505 00:20:24,056 --> 00:20:25,933 Ow! Ooh! Ow! 506 00:20:29,353 --> 00:20:30,771 (slingshot thwacks) 507 00:20:33,148 --> 00:20:34,608 Come on, lads! 508 00:20:34,691 --> 00:20:37,361 Let's drive 'em back to the ocean! 509 00:20:37,444 --> 00:20:39,738 (crowd screaming) 510 00:20:42,616 --> 00:20:45,160 (bell chiming) 511 00:20:46,828 --> 00:20:48,705 Well, you got to hand it to those dolphins. 512 00:20:48,789 --> 00:20:50,082 They just wanted it more. 513 00:20:50,457 --> 00:20:52,251 I kind of wish I hadn't freed their leader. 514 00:20:52,334 --> 00:20:55,754 And, you know... doomed mankind. 515 00:20:55,837 --> 00:20:58,423 Oh, honey, I wouldn't say "doomed." 516 00:20:58,507 --> 00:21:00,884 It's going to be an adjustment, no question. 517 00:21:00,968 --> 00:21:02,386 But... Ugh... 518 00:21:10,644 --> 00:21:12,145 Can you believe it, Kodos? 519 00:21:12,229 --> 00:21:14,773 They left us out of the Halloween show. 520 00:21:14,856 --> 00:21:17,818 Are you sure the space phone is working? 521 00:21:18,360 --> 00:21:19,695 -(dial tone) -Hang up. 522 00:21:19,778 --> 00:21:21,863 They could be trying to call right now. 523 00:21:22,281 --> 00:21:24,574 I knew we should have sent them a muffin basket. 524 00:21:24,658 --> 00:21:25,659 (phone ringing) 525 00:21:26,827 --> 00:21:28,495 {\an8}Kang and Kodos productions. 526 00:21:29,121 --> 00:21:31,331 {\an8}Uh-huh. Yes. 527 00:21:32,374 --> 00:21:33,417 {\an8}Just a second. 528 00:21:33,750 --> 00:21:34,960 Do we want to do a commercial 529 00:21:35,043 --> 00:21:36,920 for something called "Old Navy"? 530 00:21:37,337 --> 00:21:39,214 Mmm, work is work. 531 00:21:45,637 --> 00:21:47,556 (theme music playing) 532 00:22:24,718 --> 00:22:26,720 (screaming) 533 00:22:29,681 --> 00:22:31,683 {\an8}Captioned by Visual Data Media Services