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CHORUS: ♪ The Simpsons ♪
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(theme music playing)
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(bell ringing)
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(whistle blows)
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(beeping)
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(playing the blues)
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(honking horn)
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(tires screeching)
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D'oh. (screams)
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(tires screeching)
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(all screaming)
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{\an8}Ah, trash night.
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{\an8}In France, they call it
La Nuit Des Poubelles.
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{\an8}In Germany, it's "Crappenfest."
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{\an8}I can't believe it only comes
52 times a year.
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{\an8}Quit gabbing and start grabbing.
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{\an8}And remember the best stuff is usually
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{\an8}deep in the garbage juice.
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{\an8}See? A new pacifier for Maggie.
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{\an8}Looky here. Cardy-board tubes.
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{\an8}Now we can have indoor plumbing
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{\an8}just like they's got
at the women's lock-up.
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{\an8}They spoilt you, Brandine.
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{\an8}Sometimes I don't even know
who you are anymore.
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{\an8}Ha! Looks like Milhouse's mom
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{\an8}finally threw out his blanky.
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{\an8}He'll pay a lot to get this back.
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{\an8}Especially when we send it
to him piece by piece.
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{\an8}(evil laughing)
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(groaning)
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(humming)
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Shh. Quiet.
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{\an8}It seems I will never sell
these She-Hulk vs.
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{\an8}Leon Spinks Comics.
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{\an8}Worst cross-over ever.
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{\an8}(mumbling)
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(screaming)
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Shoo, nerds, shoo!
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(chittering)
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{\an8}Well, this muscle shirt's
a pretty good find.
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{\an8}Dad, that's a sports bra.
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All I know is, I'm finally getting
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the support I need.
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Look, Dad, barber hair.
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(sniffing)
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{\an8}Ooh, Italian.
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Hey, Vinnie, how's about a pizza?
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I got-a no job.
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{\an8}(gasps) Mama Mia.
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Look what the
Hawaiian restaurant threw out.
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Get out of my dreams and into my car.
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(hissing)
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{\an8}I don't remember the air
in the kitchen being so wavy.
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{\an8}(sniffs) Good lord, that's gas.
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(grunts)
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HOMER: Behold,
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I am king Talkie-Tiki.
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(both scream)
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{\an8}Hey, Flanders.
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{\an8}Can your god do that?
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{\an8}Actually, Homer, you
and I worship the same god, so...
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{\an8}HOMER: Irregardless, I am your God now.
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(grunts)
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(laughing)
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{\an8}Homer, you just can't reroute
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{\an8}the gas line.
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{\an8}Do you know how dangerous that is?
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{\an8}HOMER: Do not anger Talkie-Tiki!
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{\an8}I am all-power...
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{\an8}-(screams)
-I'll be at Moe's.
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{\an8}So I says to the cop,
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{\an8}"No, you're driving under the influence
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{\an8}of being a jerk."
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{\an8}(laughing)
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{\an8}(sighs)
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{\an8}Hey, Barney, what's with the glum face?
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You glum or something? Huh, glummy?
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You know, it was my birthday last week
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and no one remembered.
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What are you, nuts?
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I threw you a party at my house.
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You lie!
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Why would I not remember my own...
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-Birthday?
-But we did have
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a shindig for you, Barn.
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We even videotaped it. Look.
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MOE: Oh, that's it, baby.
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All for Moe.
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Oh, yeah, work the slot.
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Show me the package.
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(chuckles) Whoa...
That's, that's a project
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I'm working on. Sorry.
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BART: OK, Mom, we're rolling.
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I wrote a poem for Barney
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on this special occasion.
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"Now that you're one year older,
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the time flew by so fast..."
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-Bart!
-(Bart laughs)
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Give me that.
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(grunts)
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I'm just saying that,
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when we die
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there's going to be a planet
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for the French,
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a planet for the Chinese,
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and we'll all be a lot happier.
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Mr. Gumbel, you're upsetting me.
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No, I'm not.
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{\an8}Gee, is that who I look like
when I'm drunk?
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You wish.
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That's the stage we call
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Professor Barney--
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Talkative, coherent, even insightful.
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Here's drunk.
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(spueaking)
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(high voice) Well, I'm off to market.
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(belches)
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Marge, you're making
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a complete fool of your...
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Oh, it's just Barney.
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(screams)
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(gasps) Precious alcohol
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soaking into shag.
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(growls)
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Oh, how embarrassing.
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How did this happen?
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Oh, that. You've had that for a while.
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Yeah, I can't really
picture you without it.
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Oh, I'm a disgrace.
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Disgracefully hilarious.
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You passed out before we could
even give you your presents.
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I still got mine.
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Barney, I got you what
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no drunk can do without--
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Morning-after stationery.
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(laughing)
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And I got you helicopter flying lessons.
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Can you imagine this boozebag
at the wheel of a whirlybird?
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(laughs) He'd be all "look at me--
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I'm a tanked-up loser in a helicopter!"
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(laughs)
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Ah, anyway, happy b-day, punkin.
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So, I'm a tanked-up loser?
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Is that how you see me?
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Oh, sounds like a certain loser
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could use some tanking up.
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(grunts)
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Hey, hey. Where you going?
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I'll show you. I'm going to take
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these helicopter lessons.
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Wait a minute, Barney.
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You got to be sober to fly.
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I mean, it's not like driving a car.
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And I'm going to quit drinking.
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(laughing)
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No, I mean it.
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(laughing)
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You won't see me here again, ever.
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(laughs)
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Wait, that ain't funny.
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He's my best customer.
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Well, the handwriting's on the wall.
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To stay afloat, this bar's
going to have to go queer.
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You mean, it's not?
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Oh!
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Wrong again,
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Gay Guide to Springfield.
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Farewell, my long-necked friends.
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(grunts)
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All right, world, get ready
to meet the clean and sober
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Barney Gumbel.
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Whee!
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Give me a beer.
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I knew you'd be back.
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(quietly) Santeria, you're the greatest.
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Barney, didn't you say you
were going to stop drinking?
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I know... but it's so hard!
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Please help me, Homer!
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You came to the right guy.
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I'll straighten you out
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right after I finish this beer.
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(sighs)
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Ah, man, that's sweet.
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OK, let's go.
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{\an8}My name is Barney,
and... I'm an alcoholic.
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I feel for you, pally, but, uh, you want
A.A.-- This is triple "A."
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Oh. My name is Homer,
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and I'm planning a trip
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-to St. Louis.
-East St. Louis?
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Is there any other St. Louis?
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(indistinct chatter)
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Ah, welcome back, Homer.
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I see you've finally hit rock bottom.
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(scoffing) Not a chance.
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I can sink way lower.
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I just came to help my friend Barney.
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We all know why we're here, don't we?
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To keep ourselves sober and to network.
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So let's get started.
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Well, after I lost
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my third job in two days
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old Gil was in a pit of despair.
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And that's when you realized
you were an alcoholic.
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Oh, no, I never touch the stuff,
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but you don't have to be drunk
to know the value of Amway.
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-Oh.
-Huh-huh.
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00:08:48,611 --> 00:08:50,696
Now, this is used crankcase oil
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which you ladies know is
murder to clean up, you know
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and company's coming.
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Ah! You're doing this
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at the worst possible time.
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GIL: Ah, your finger is in my eye.
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00:09:01,749 --> 00:09:04,710
I have a problem with alcohol,
and I need help.
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00:09:04,794 --> 00:09:07,129
Well, your recovery begins today
215
00:09:07,213 --> 00:09:08,965
and we promise you all the sugar cookies
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and secondhand smoke you can handle.
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These sugar cookies you speak of--
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Are they real or symbolic?
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They're on that table over there.
220
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Oh, I don't want to walk that far.
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Anything that takes 12 steps
isn't worth doing.
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Get it? Huh? 12?
223
00:09:26,941 --> 00:09:27,858
(laughing)
224
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Steps?
225
00:09:30,695 --> 00:09:32,572
Hey, how did I get out here?
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00:09:34,073 --> 00:09:35,408
(giggling)
227
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Hurt everyone.
228
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Did Gaga just say "hurt everyone"?
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(laughing) Gaga-- cute name.
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ANNOUNCER: The Springfield phone book
231
00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:43,791
needs a new cover.
232
00:09:43,874 --> 00:09:45,209
-It does?
-It does?
233
00:09:45,293 --> 00:09:46,377
Send us your snapshots,
234
00:09:46,460 --> 00:09:47,587
and, if we select yours,
235
00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:48,838
you win a fabulous
236
00:09:48,921 --> 00:09:50,047
mystery prize.
237
00:09:50,131 --> 00:09:51,048
To enter, send your film
238
00:09:51,132 --> 00:09:52,133
to this address.
239
00:09:52,216 --> 00:09:53,676
Too quick? Try again.
240
00:09:54,093 --> 00:09:55,761
Did you get it? Here it is.
241
00:09:55,845 --> 00:09:56,929
Coming in from the left.
242
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Don't delay. Do it today!
243
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You think we should enter?
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Well, it shouldn't be too hard
245
00:10:01,434 --> 00:10:02,602
to beat the old photo.
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(Lisa exclaims)
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Hmm, it's gotta be here somewhere.
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Hey, here's a camera.
249
00:10:14,780 --> 00:10:16,866
And it's still got a roll of film in it.
250
00:10:16,949 --> 00:10:19,368
Man, these old cameras
are really built solid.
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Bart, we need that to win the contest.
252
00:10:22,371 --> 00:10:23,497
Win the what now?
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00:10:28,669 --> 00:10:30,046
(sighs)
254
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Here it goes.
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So he's so busy worrying
about the front rotor
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he walks right into the back one.
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00:10:35,926 --> 00:10:37,595
(laughing)
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Only in this business.
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I'd like to sign up
for helicopter lessons.
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Sorry, pal, but it takes
a special kind of man
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to pilot these birds.
262
00:10:46,979 --> 00:10:47,980
I got a coupon.
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OK, get in.
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Elvis played a chopper pilot one time.
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He made so many darn mistakes
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We were just laughing at him.
267
00:11:00,284 --> 00:11:01,577
Great singer, though.
268
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:02,703
Oh, absolutely. You know
269
00:11:02,787 --> 00:11:03,788
who else I like
270
00:11:03,871 --> 00:11:05,831
is that, uh, Leo Sayer.
271
00:11:06,332 --> 00:11:08,459
Anyway, we're nice and level now.
272
00:11:08,542 --> 00:11:10,503
How'd you like to take the controls?
273
00:11:10,586 --> 00:11:12,046
You think I'm ready?
274
00:11:12,129 --> 00:11:13,798
Sure, I do. One sec.
275
00:11:13,881 --> 00:11:16,050
Testing black box-- one, two.
276
00:11:16,384 --> 00:11:19,053
(screaming)
277
00:11:19,595 --> 00:11:21,013
She's all yours, friend.
278
00:11:23,599 --> 00:11:25,101
BARNEY: Whoa! Whoa!
279
00:11:25,184 --> 00:11:26,227
Oh!
280
00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:27,436
Oh! Hey!
281
00:11:27,978 --> 00:11:29,397
I think I'm getting it.
282
00:11:29,480 --> 00:11:30,773
Yes, that's great.
283
00:11:31,148 --> 00:11:32,858
Now let's just pull ourselves
284
00:11:32,942 --> 00:11:34,568
out of this tailspin here.
285
00:11:37,071 --> 00:11:39,198
Ooh! Oh, I'm sorry about that.
286
00:11:39,281 --> 00:11:41,826
It's OK. That's what the diapers are for.
287
00:11:44,912 --> 00:11:47,415
Now, when the mamma bird
returns to feed her babies,
288
00:11:47,498 --> 00:11:49,125
we'll have a prize-winning picture.
289
00:11:49,458 --> 00:11:52,128
Lisa, people these days don't
want to see a baby bird.
290
00:11:52,211 --> 00:11:53,963
They want to see celebrities
at their worst.
291
00:11:54,505 --> 00:11:55,506
(bell rings)
292
00:11:57,758 --> 00:11:59,468
Is that Rainier Wolfcastle?
293
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:00,720
Check out the gut.
294
00:12:00,803 --> 00:12:01,971
It's for a movie.
295
00:12:02,054 --> 00:12:03,806
I'm playing a fat secret agent.
296
00:12:08,644 --> 00:12:09,562
Hey, Homer.
297
00:12:09,645 --> 00:12:11,021
Oh, no, no, no. Don't sit there.
298
00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:12,898
Take this seat, right next to the tap.
299
00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:15,067
But that's Barney's seat.
300
00:12:15,484 --> 00:12:17,570
Are you trying to make me the new Barney?
301
00:12:17,653 --> 00:12:20,406
Hey, every bar needs a world-class drunk.
302
00:12:20,489 --> 00:12:23,409
Yeah, someone who makes
our alcoholism seem less raging.
303
00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:25,244
Well, forget it, guys.
304
00:12:25,327 --> 00:12:26,662
I am not Barney.
305
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:27,663
(belches)
306
00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:29,582
(all laughing)
307
00:12:30,458 --> 00:12:32,418
See, Homer? It's not so bad.
308
00:12:32,501 --> 00:12:33,544
Now dance, Rummy!
309
00:12:33,878 --> 00:12:35,087
O-OK.
310
00:12:35,171 --> 00:12:38,507
(mumbling melody)
311
00:12:43,137 --> 00:12:45,806
You danced for hours just because
they told you to?
312
00:12:45,890 --> 00:12:47,850
If I didn't, I'd lose their respect.
313
00:12:47,933 --> 00:12:49,727
(helicopter approaching)
314
00:12:50,269 --> 00:12:51,270
Check it out, Homer!
315
00:12:51,353 --> 00:12:52,980
I'm flying this thing!
316
00:12:53,063 --> 00:12:55,024
Get it away from the house!
317
00:12:55,107 --> 00:12:56,358
Want to go for a ride?
318
00:12:56,442 --> 00:12:57,443
Can I, Marge? Can I?
319
00:12:57,526 --> 00:12:59,487
Yes, go! Just go!
320
00:13:01,989 --> 00:13:04,241
So you missed some big changes at Moe's.
321
00:13:04,325 --> 00:13:06,994
He hangs newspapers over the urinals now.
322
00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:09,622
You can read the sports page
while you pee!
323
00:13:10,039 --> 00:13:11,791
Very la-di-da.
324
00:13:11,874 --> 00:13:13,876
I've made some big changes, too.
325
00:13:13,959 --> 00:13:16,086
Can you believe I'm flying
this helicopter?
326
00:13:16,170 --> 00:13:17,421
Powerlines! Powerlines!
327
00:13:17,505 --> 00:13:18,506
Whoops, sorry.
328
00:13:20,758 --> 00:13:23,844
When I think about all the time
I've wasted at Moe's...
329
00:13:23,928 --> 00:13:24,929
Wasted?
330
00:13:25,012 --> 00:13:26,514
What about our staring contests
331
00:13:26,889 --> 00:13:28,933
and the way we always knew
what football coaches
332
00:13:29,016 --> 00:13:30,976
should've done Remember the day we jumped
333
00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:33,145
that census guy and stole his clicker?
334
00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:35,731
Those are all priceless memories, Homer,
335
00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:38,400
{\an8}but I don't want to do that stuff anymore.
336
00:13:38,776 --> 00:13:41,028
Oh, so you're better than me, is that it?
337
00:13:41,111 --> 00:13:42,863
I didn't say that.
338
00:13:42,947 --> 00:13:44,031
Take me home.
339
00:13:44,114 --> 00:13:45,282
Oh, don't be that way, Homer.
340
00:13:45,366 --> 00:13:47,284
-I'll scream.
-OK, OK.
341
00:13:52,581 --> 00:13:54,250
So how was your ride with Barney?
342
00:13:54,333 --> 00:13:55,751
I don't want to talk about it.
343
00:13:55,835 --> 00:13:56,752
(crying)
344
00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:57,837
(slams door)
345
00:13:57,920 --> 00:13:59,547
(sobbing)
346
00:13:59,630 --> 00:14:00,631
(grunts)
347
00:14:08,472 --> 00:14:09,640
(grunting)
348
00:14:09,723 --> 00:14:10,891
Stupid Barney.
349
00:14:10,975 --> 00:14:12,309
Thinks he's too good for me.
350
00:14:12,393 --> 00:14:13,727
Cheer up, Homie.
351
00:14:13,811 --> 00:14:16,063
You don't need friends to be happy.
352
00:14:16,146 --> 00:14:18,274
I haven't had a friend in years.
353
00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:19,483
But you've got me.
354
00:14:19,567 --> 00:14:20,526
What have I got?
355
00:14:20,609 --> 00:14:23,988
Oh. Well, you still have Lenny and Carl.
356
00:14:24,071 --> 00:14:26,365
Aw, Lenny and Carl suck.
357
00:14:26,782 --> 00:14:28,450
Please don't tell Lenny
and Carl I said that
358
00:14:28,534 --> 00:14:30,077
'cause if I ever lost them as friends...
359
00:14:30,160 --> 00:14:31,620
{\an8}Look, if Barney's that important to you
360
00:14:31,704 --> 00:14:33,622
you've got to work it out.
361
00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:35,332
Old friends stick together
362
00:14:35,416 --> 00:14:37,084
Like O.J. and A.C.
363
00:14:37,167 --> 00:14:38,961
Or The Falcon and the Snowman.
364
00:14:39,044 --> 00:14:41,005
Oh, why can't I have a nickname?
365
00:14:43,591 --> 00:14:44,633
(sighs)
366
00:14:46,510 --> 00:14:47,761
LISA: OK, that's it.
367
00:14:49,346 --> 00:14:50,389
Looks good.
368
00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:53,517
Aw, Bart, the bulldog didn't ante.
369
00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:56,228
OK, on three.
370
00:14:56,312 --> 00:14:57,438
One, two...
371
00:14:58,063 --> 00:15:00,649
Perfect! Phone book cover, here I come!
372
00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:03,527
{\an8}-Ha! Ha!
-Hey! No fair!
373
00:15:03,611 --> 00:15:05,946
Oh, we'll never get a good picture.
374
00:15:06,030 --> 00:15:08,032
Hey, why don't we dump
spaghetti on Maggie's head?
375
00:15:08,115 --> 00:15:09,742
That picture's a cliche.
376
00:15:09,825 --> 00:15:10,826
Picture?
377
00:15:15,289 --> 00:15:17,249
Hey, Apu, you got any
of those potato chips
378
00:15:17,333 --> 00:15:18,375
that give you diarrhea?
379
00:15:18,834 --> 00:15:20,794
I need to do a little spring cleaning.
380
00:15:21,128 --> 00:15:23,339
They're in the safety cabinet.
I'll get the key.
381
00:15:23,422 --> 00:15:24,506
(bell rings)
382
00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:27,801
Oh, hello, Homer.
383
00:15:28,177 --> 00:15:29,386
Barney.
384
00:15:29,470 --> 00:15:30,387
Beer, huh?
385
00:15:30,471 --> 00:15:31,388
That's right.
386
00:15:31,472 --> 00:15:32,598
Enjoy.
387
00:15:32,681 --> 00:15:34,141
-That, I will.
-Then we agree.
388
00:15:34,224 --> 00:15:35,184
{\an8}You keep thinking that.
389
00:15:35,267 --> 00:15:36,644
{\an8}-I will.
-Me, too.
390
00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:38,437
-Good day then.
-Good day, then is right.
391
00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:39,772
-Ta.
-Ta-ta.
392
00:15:39,855 --> 00:15:40,856
(bell rings)
393
00:15:41,357 --> 00:15:42,900
Hey, you did not pay for that beer!
394
00:15:43,651 --> 00:15:44,652
(yells)
395
00:15:48,322 --> 00:15:50,199
Boy, you can see everything
396
00:15:50,282 --> 00:15:51,575
from Mount Springfield--
397
00:15:51,659 --> 00:15:53,702
The squidport, the old monorail...
398
00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:54,787
BART: The play-doh factory.
399
00:15:57,706 --> 00:15:58,791
(buzzer)
400
00:15:58,874 --> 00:16:00,501
Crescent moon! Crescent moon!
401
00:16:02,086 --> 00:16:03,128
(clicking)
402
00:16:03,212 --> 00:16:04,588
Come on, Springfield.
403
00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:05,673
Sparkle for me, baby.
404
00:16:06,048 --> 00:16:07,132
That's it.
405
00:16:07,883 --> 00:16:08,801
Heads up!
406
00:16:08,884 --> 00:16:09,927
Ow!
407
00:16:10,010 --> 00:16:11,804
Bart, that's hot.
408
00:16:11,887 --> 00:16:12,972
I said, "Heads up."
409
00:16:17,810 --> 00:16:18,811
(crackling)
410
00:16:20,771 --> 00:16:23,273
Lenny, Carl, I know a lot
of people badmouth you
411
00:16:23,357 --> 00:16:26,068
and focus on how you suck, but not me.
412
00:16:26,443 --> 00:16:28,570
To me, you're true blue.
413
00:16:28,654 --> 00:16:30,280
Aw, thanks, big guy.
414
00:16:30,364 --> 00:16:31,532
Now dance, Rummy!
415
00:16:31,615 --> 00:16:32,533
OK.
416
00:16:32,616 --> 00:16:34,535
(mumbling melody)
417
00:16:35,577 --> 00:16:36,495
Hiya, Moe.
418
00:16:36,578 --> 00:16:38,080
Well, if it isn't little
419
00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:40,874
Miss I'm-not-wasting- my-life-anymore--
420
00:16:40,958 --> 00:16:42,126
Which he is.
421
00:16:42,626 --> 00:16:44,670
Moe, I've come here to make amends
422
00:16:44,753 --> 00:16:47,673
for my disgraceful behavior
over the last 20 years.
423
00:16:47,756 --> 00:16:49,174
No, that's OK, Barn.
424
00:16:49,258 --> 00:16:50,300
No, it's not OK.
425
00:16:50,384 --> 00:16:51,885
I broke barstools,
426
00:16:51,969 --> 00:16:53,429
befouled your broom closet
427
00:16:53,512 --> 00:16:55,848
and made sweet love to your pool table
428
00:16:55,931 --> 00:16:57,349
which I then befouled.
429
00:16:57,683 --> 00:17:00,436
Well, that would explain
the drop-off in play.
430
00:17:00,519 --> 00:17:02,521
This is a Channel Six news bulletin.
431
00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:05,232
{\an8}Fire has broken out on Mount Springfield
432
00:17:05,315 --> 00:17:07,860
trapping two youngsters and their camera.
433
00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:09,862
Oh, no! That's Bart and Lisa!
434
00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:13,115
Unfortunately, fire trucks are
unavailable to fight the blaze
435
00:17:13,198 --> 00:17:15,617
as they're all being used to film the new
Burt Reynolds movie
436
00:17:15,701 --> 00:17:17,244
Fireball and Mudflap.
437
00:17:17,786 --> 00:17:19,121
I caught up with Burt on the set.
438
00:17:19,496 --> 00:17:20,998
So, Burt, tell us a little
439
00:17:21,081 --> 00:17:22,791
about Fireball and Mudflap.
440
00:17:23,125 --> 00:17:24,960
Well, I play Jerry "Fireball" mudflap,
441
00:17:25,044 --> 00:17:26,712
a feisty supreme court justice
442
00:17:26,795 --> 00:17:28,464
who's searching for his birth-mother
443
00:17:28,547 --> 00:17:30,924
while competing in a cross-country
fire truck race.
444
00:17:31,008 --> 00:17:32,426
It's garbage.
445
00:17:35,304 --> 00:17:37,890
Barney, you got to fly us
up there and save my kids!
446
00:17:37,973 --> 00:17:38,974
{\an8}I can't.
447
00:17:39,058 --> 00:17:40,642
{\an8}I've never flown solo.
448
00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:44,146
Barney, the call is from heroism.
449
00:17:44,229 --> 00:17:46,440
Will you accept the charges?
450
00:17:47,775 --> 00:17:49,359
(flames crackling)
451
00:17:53,947 --> 00:17:55,741
Where you going? The fire's that way!
452
00:17:56,116 --> 00:17:57,242
I know, I know!
453
00:17:57,576 --> 00:17:59,286
I haven't learned right turns yet.
454
00:17:59,369 --> 00:18:00,746
Aah! Look out!
455
00:18:00,829 --> 00:18:03,207
(screaming)
456
00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:07,002
(cars honking)
457
00:18:07,086 --> 00:18:09,379
(tires screeching)
458
00:18:09,797 --> 00:18:10,964
I can't do this.
459
00:18:11,048 --> 00:18:12,382
My nerves are shot.
460
00:18:15,344 --> 00:18:16,929
(tires screeching)
461
00:18:17,012 --> 00:18:19,223
(clattering)
462
00:18:19,681 --> 00:18:21,391
Beer! That's what I need!
463
00:18:21,767 --> 00:18:23,393
Barney, no, don't!
464
00:18:23,477 --> 00:18:24,603
Yes, I need it!
465
00:18:24,686 --> 00:18:25,687
(moans)
466
00:18:26,772 --> 00:18:28,398
No! You've got to be sober for this.
467
00:18:28,482 --> 00:18:29,525
Give me that!
468
00:18:30,526 --> 00:18:31,527
Ew, it's warm.
469
00:18:33,445 --> 00:18:34,738
You can't drink them all!
470
00:18:34,822 --> 00:18:35,864
Oh, yes, I can.
471
00:18:35,948 --> 00:18:37,199
(both grunting)
472
00:18:37,282 --> 00:18:38,283
Give me that!
473
00:18:39,159 --> 00:18:40,077
(tops popping)
474
00:18:40,160 --> 00:18:42,287
(gulping)
475
00:18:44,623 --> 00:18:47,459
I won't let you give up now
when you've worked so hard
476
00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:49,920
(slurring) to be the greatest pal
477
00:18:50,003 --> 00:18:51,171
in the world.
478
00:18:51,255 --> 00:18:53,382
I love you.
479
00:18:53,465 --> 00:18:56,009
Let's not lose touch after graduation.
480
00:18:56,093 --> 00:18:58,345
(snoring)
481
00:19:00,514 --> 00:19:01,557
You brave man.
482
00:19:02,057 --> 00:19:04,143
You took six silver bullets for me.
483
00:19:04,518 --> 00:19:06,645
Stay away from my wife!
484
00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:08,147
(groans)
485
00:19:09,189 --> 00:19:10,983
Looks like it's up to me.
486
00:19:20,909 --> 00:19:22,536
(both panting)
487
00:19:22,953 --> 00:19:23,954
We should be safe up here.
488
00:19:24,037 --> 00:19:25,998
I'm pretty sure fires can't climb trees.
489
00:19:26,081 --> 00:19:27,124
Ow!
490
00:19:27,207 --> 00:19:28,125
Dad!
491
00:19:28,208 --> 00:19:29,209
Hi, kids!
492
00:19:29,293 --> 00:19:30,627
-(laughing)
-Hang on!
493
00:19:30,711 --> 00:19:31,879
I'll throw you a ladder!
494
00:19:34,923 --> 00:19:36,800
(all screaming)
495
00:19:38,427 --> 00:19:40,220
(shrieks) Get off! Get off!
496
00:19:43,473 --> 00:19:44,474
(thuds)
497
00:19:46,602 --> 00:19:48,395
(both whimpering)
498
00:19:48,478 --> 00:19:50,105
Dad, help!
499
00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:51,899
All right, I'm coming!
500
00:19:51,982 --> 00:19:52,941
Whoa!
501
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:54,276
(screams)
502
00:19:54,359 --> 00:19:56,820
Let me know if you're going
to do that again, Homer.
503
00:20:11,585 --> 00:20:12,794
You did it, Dad.
504
00:20:12,878 --> 00:20:15,422
You can't prove I did it.
505
00:20:15,505 --> 00:20:18,175
No, you saved our lives.
506
00:20:18,258 --> 00:20:21,303
I could do a lot of things
if I had some money.
507
00:20:21,386 --> 00:20:22,429
What?
508
00:20:22,512 --> 00:20:24,181
Now there's a picture.
509
00:20:30,812 --> 00:20:31,897
Kids!
510
00:20:31,980 --> 00:20:33,565
The new phone books are here
511
00:20:33,649 --> 00:20:35,901
and your picture's on the cover!
512
00:20:36,276 --> 00:20:37,694
-All right!
-Wow, cool!
513
00:20:37,778 --> 00:20:38,779
Let me see!
514
00:20:39,404 --> 00:20:40,822
(both scream)
515
00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:42,824
MARGE: Isn't it adorable?
516
00:20:42,908 --> 00:20:45,535
I guess some baby pictures
were on that old roll of film.
517
00:20:45,619 --> 00:20:48,664
Aw, we'll be the laughingstock
of the whole town.
518
00:20:48,747 --> 00:20:50,916
Well, at least we won the bike.
519
00:20:50,999 --> 00:20:53,293
Actually, I took the picture.
520
00:20:53,377 --> 00:20:55,879
So I gave my prize to the orphanage.
521
00:20:55,963 --> 00:20:57,297
-What?
-How could you?
522
00:20:57,381 --> 00:20:58,423
Just kidding.
523
00:20:58,507 --> 00:20:59,925
I would never do that.
524
00:21:06,223 --> 00:21:08,475
Well, I'm glad we're friends again.
525
00:21:08,558 --> 00:21:09,601
Yeah.
526
00:21:09,977 --> 00:21:11,561
So what do you call this stuff?
527
00:21:11,645 --> 00:21:13,939
A double tall mocha latte.
528
00:21:15,732 --> 00:21:16,733
It's not bad.
529
00:21:16,817 --> 00:21:18,360
Well, it ain't beer.
530
00:21:19,361 --> 00:21:22,322
But at least I got
that monkey off my back.
531
00:21:28,287 --> 00:21:29,413
Oh... (belches)
532
00:21:30,956 --> 00:21:32,708
Nobody gets away from Moe.
533
00:21:33,417 --> 00:21:34,626
{\an8}Nobody.
534
00:21:35,377 --> 00:21:37,421
(steam hissing)
535
00:21:39,881 --> 00:21:42,926
(laughs)
536
00:21:43,010 --> 00:21:44,636
(coughs)
537
00:22:24,551 --> 00:22:25,969
-(murmuring)
-Shh.
538
00:22:29,389 --> 00:22:31,391
{\an8}Captioned by
Visual Data Media Services