2 00:00:34,198 --> 00:00:36,496 (music)Hey, hey, hey, hey (music) 3 00:00:37,802 --> 00:00:40,032 (music) Ooh (music) 4 00:00:40,104 --> 00:00:44,200 (music) Ooh-whoa (music) 5 00:00:50,014 --> 00:00:53,916 (music) Won't you come see about me (music) 6 00:00:53,985 --> 00:00:58,888 (music)I'll be alone dancing, you know it, baby (music) 7 00:00:58,956 --> 00:01:02,824 (music) Tell me your troubles and doubts (music) 8 00:01:02,894 --> 00:01:07,627 (music) Givin'me everything inside and out and (music) 9 00:01:07,698 --> 00:01:11,464 (music)Love's strange So real in the dark (music) 10 00:01:11,536 --> 00:01:16,337 (music) Think of the tender things that we were working on (music) 11 00:01:16,407 --> 00:01:20,673 (music)Slow change may pull us apart (music) 12 00:01:20,745 --> 00:01:25,341 (music) When the light gets into your heart, baby (music) 13 00:01:25,416 --> 00:01:27,907 (music)Don't you (music) 14 00:01:27,985 --> 00:01:31,421 (music)Forget about me (music) 15 00:01:31,489 --> 00:01:34,287 (music)Don't, don't don't, don't (music) 16 00:01:34,358 --> 00:01:36,690 (music)Don't you (music) 17 00:01:36,761 --> 00:01:39,252 (music)Forget about me (music) 18 00:01:42,567 --> 00:01:46,833 (music) Will you stand above me (music) 19 00:01:46,904 --> 00:01:51,307 (music)Look my way but never love me (music) 20 00:01:51,375 --> 00:01:56,005 (music)Rain keeps fallin' Rain keeps fallin'(music) 21 00:01:56,080 --> 00:02:00,414 (music)Down, down, down (music) 22 00:02:00,485 --> 00:02:03,147 [Shattering] 23 00:02:09,026 --> 00:02:13,963 [Boy] Saturday, March 24, 1984. 24 00:02:14,031 --> 00:02:18,092 Shermer High School, Shermer, Illinois, 60062. 25 00:02:24,208 --> 00:02:26,540 "Dear Mr. Vernon... 26 00:02:26,611 --> 00:02:29,910 "We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention... 27 00:02:29,981 --> 00:02:32,711 "for whatever it was we did wrong. 28 00:02:32,783 --> 00:02:34,580 "What we did was wrong... 29 00:02:36,621 --> 00:02:40,819 "but we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we are. 30 00:02:40,892 --> 00:02:42,883 "What do you care? 31 00:02:42,960 --> 00:02:46,521 "You see us as you want to see us... 32 00:02:46,597 --> 00:02:50,363 "in the simplest terms, with the most convenient definitions. 33 00:02:50,434 --> 00:02:52,902 "You see us as a brain... 34 00:02:52,970 --> 00:02:57,600 "an athlete, a basket case... 35 00:02:57,675 --> 00:03:00,007 "a princess... 36 00:03:00,077 --> 00:03:02,409 "and a criminal. 37 00:03:03,581 --> 00:03:05,913 "Correct? 38 00:03:08,085 --> 00:03:11,543 "That's the way we saw each other at 7:00 this morning. 39 00:03:11,622 --> 00:03:13,556 We were brainwashed. ' 40 00:03:22,934 --> 00:03:27,701 I can't believe you can't get me out of this. [Sighs] 41 00:03:27,772 --> 00:03:32,766 It's so absurd I have to be here on a Saturday. 42 00:03:32,843 --> 00:03:35,607 It's not like I'm a defective or anything. 43 00:03:35,680 --> 00:03:37,170 I'll make it up to you. 44 00:03:37,248 --> 00:03:40,581 Honey, ditching class to go shopping doesn't make you a defective. 45 00:03:40,651 --> 00:03:42,949 Have a good day. 46 00:03:47,792 --> 00:03:52,252 Is this the first time or last time we do this? Last. 47 00:03:52,330 --> 00:03:55,060 Well, get in there and use the time to your advantage. 48 00:03:55,132 --> 00:03:57,930 Mom, we're not supposed to study. We have to sit there and do nothing. 49 00:03:58,002 --> 00:04:01,130 Well, mister, you figure out a way to study. Yeah. 50 00:04:03,341 --> 00:04:05,502 Well, go. 51 00:04:11,015 --> 00:04:13,643 Hey, I screwed around. 52 00:04:13,718 --> 00:04:16,585 Guys screw around. There's nothing wrong with that... 53 00:04:16,654 --> 00:04:20,920 except you got caught, sport. Yeah, Mom already reamed me. 54 00:04:20,992 --> 00:04:23,654 You want to miss a match? You want to blow your ride? 55 00:04:23,728 --> 00:04:28,222 Now, no school is gonna give a scholarship to a discipline case. 56 00:04:39,910 --> 00:04:41,844 [Tires Skid] 57 00:05:44,608 --> 00:05:47,202 [Snickers] 58 00:05:57,154 --> 00:06:00,385 Well, well. Here we are. 59 00:06:01,726 --> 00:06:03,887 I wanna congratulate you for being on time. 60 00:06:03,961 --> 00:06:07,761 Excuse me, sir? I think there's been a mistake. 61 00:06:07,832 --> 00:06:12,201 I know it's detention but, um, I don't think I belong in here. 62 00:06:14,538 --> 00:06:18,474 It is now 7:06. 63 00:06:18,542 --> 00:06:23,309 You have exactly eight hours and fifty-four minutes to think about why you're here. 64 00:06:23,381 --> 00:06:27,215 Ponder the error of your ways. [Hawks, Spits] 65 00:06:27,284 --> 00:06:29,752 - [Gasps] - You may not talk. 66 00:06:32,390 --> 00:06:36,383 You will not move from these seats. 67 00:06:38,529 --> 00:06:41,692 And you... will not sleep. 68 00:06:46,370 --> 00:06:50,363 All right, people, we're going to try something a little different today. 69 00:06:50,441 --> 00:06:55,811 We are going to write an essay... of no less than a thousand words... 70 00:06:57,882 --> 00:07:01,045 describing to me who you think you are. Is this a test? 71 00:07:01,118 --> 00:07:05,748 And when I say essay, I mean essay. 72 00:07:05,823 --> 00:07:11,159 I do not mean a single word repeated a thousand times. 73 00:07:12,229 --> 00:07:15,289 - Is that clear, Mr. Bender? - Crystal. 74 00:07:15,366 --> 00:07:19,029 Good. Maybe you'll learn something about yourself. 75 00:07:19,103 --> 00:07:22,800 Maybe you'll even decide whether or not you care to return. 76 00:07:22,873 --> 00:07:26,309 Uh, I can answer that right now, sir. 77 00:07:26,377 --> 00:07:29,642 - That'd be no for me, 'cause... - Sit down, Johnson. 78 00:07:29,713 --> 00:07:32,045 Thank you, sir. 79 00:07:33,884 --> 00:07:38,378 My office is right across that hall. Any monkey business is ill-advised. 80 00:07:38,456 --> 00:07:41,186 Any questions? 81 00:07:42,226 --> 00:07:44,786 Yeah. I got a question. 82 00:07:44,862 --> 00:07:47,888 Does Barry Manilow know that you raid his wardrobe? 83 00:07:47,965 --> 00:07:51,162 I'll give you the answer to that question, Mr. Bender, next Saturday. 84 00:07:52,770 --> 00:07:56,934 Don't mess with the bull, young man, you'll get the horns. 85 00:07:58,909 --> 00:08:01,673 That man is a brownie hound. 86 00:08:07,485 --> 00:08:09,419 [Clicking Noise] 87 00:08:10,821 --> 00:08:13,881 [Clicking Continues] 88 00:08:16,894 --> 00:08:18,987 [Clicking Continues] 89 00:08:25,169 --> 00:08:27,160 [Clicking Stops] 90 00:08:34,011 --> 00:08:36,707 You keep eating your hand, you're not going to be hungry for lunch. 91 00:08:36,780 --> 00:08:38,543 [Loud Click] [Spits] 92 00:08:38,616 --> 00:08:41,608 I've seen you before, you know. 93 00:08:51,328 --> 00:08:53,922 [Under Breath] Who I think I am. 94 00:08:53,998 --> 00:08:56,626 Who are you? 95 00:08:56,700 --> 00:08:59,191 Who are you? 96 00:09:01,138 --> 00:09:03,038 I am a walrus. 97 00:09:27,431 --> 00:09:29,422 [Blows] 98 00:09:34,572 --> 00:09:37,006 It's the shits, huh? 99 00:09:38,976 --> 00:09:42,639 - [Nervous Chuckle, Clears Throat] - [Paper Rustling] 100 00:09:57,261 --> 00:10:00,253 [Music][music] [Humming] 101 00:10:07,871 --> 00:10:10,965 I can't believe this is really happening to me. 102 00:10:11,041 --> 00:10:12,975 Oh, shit! 103 00:10:13,043 --> 00:10:16,376 What are we supposed to do if we have to piss? Please. 104 00:10:16,447 --> 00:10:19,644 If you got to go, you got to go. [Zipper Unzips] 105 00:10:19,717 --> 00:10:21,708 [Grunts] Oh, my God. 106 00:10:21,785 --> 00:10:23,878 You're not urinating in here, man. Don't talk. Don't talk. 107 00:10:23,954 --> 00:10:27,651 - It makes it crawl back up. - You whip it out, you're dead before the first drop hits. 108 00:10:30,027 --> 00:10:33,554 You're pretty sexy when you get angry. [Growls] 109 00:10:36,100 --> 00:10:38,660 Hey, homeboy, why don't you go close that door. 110 00:10:38,736 --> 00:10:41,398 We'll get the prom queen impregnated. 111 00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:44,631 Hey. Hey.! 112 00:10:44,708 --> 00:10:47,370 - What? - If I lose my temper, you're totaled, man. 113 00:10:47,444 --> 00:10:51,881 - Totally? - Totally. 114 00:10:51,949 --> 00:10:55,350 Why don't you shut up? Nobody here's interested. 115 00:10:57,054 --> 00:10:59,545 Really. Buttface. 116 00:10:59,623 --> 00:11:04,322 Hey, sporto, what'd you do to get in here? Forget to wash your jock? 117 00:11:04,395 --> 00:11:07,228 Uh, excuse me, fellas, I think we should just write our papers. 118 00:11:07,297 --> 00:11:10,698 Just because you live in here doesn't give you the right to be a pain in the ass. 119 00:11:10,768 --> 00:11:13,862 So knock it off! It's a free country. 120 00:11:13,937 --> 00:11:17,839 He's just doing it to get a rise out of you. Just ignore him. 121 00:11:17,908 --> 00:11:21,344 Sweets. 122 00:11:21,412 --> 00:11:24,074 You couldn't ignore me if you tried. 123 00:11:25,949 --> 00:11:28,349 So... 124 00:11:28,419 --> 00:11:30,944 so... 125 00:11:32,690 --> 00:11:34,715 are you guys like boyfriend-girlfriend? 126 00:11:36,860 --> 00:11:39,192 Steady dates? 127 00:11:40,297 --> 00:11:42,561 Lovers? 128 00:11:42,633 --> 00:11:45,966 Come on, sporto. Level with me. 129 00:11:46,036 --> 00:11:48,596 Do you slip her the hot-beef injection? 130 00:11:48,672 --> 00:11:51,140 Go to hell! Enough! 131 00:11:51,208 --> 00:11:53,699 Hey! What's going on in there? 132 00:11:55,112 --> 00:11:57,046 Spoiled little pricks. 133 00:12:02,786 --> 00:12:04,720 Scumbag. 134 00:12:07,257 --> 00:12:09,589 What do you say we close that door? 135 00:12:09,660 --> 00:12:12,220 Can't have any kind of party with Vernon checking us every few seconds. 136 00:12:12,296 --> 00:12:14,287 You know the door's supposed to stay open. 137 00:12:14,364 --> 00:12:16,229 So what? So why don't you just shut up. 138 00:12:16,300 --> 00:12:19,133 - There's four other people in here, you know? - God, you can count. 139 00:12:19,203 --> 00:12:21,262 I knew you had to be smart to be a wrestler. 140 00:12:21,338 --> 00:12:23,932 Who the hell are you to judge anybody anyway? Really. 141 00:12:24,007 --> 00:12:26,601 [Boy] You know, Bender, you don't even count. 142 00:12:26,677 --> 00:12:29,669 If you disappear forever, it wouldn't make any difference. 143 00:12:29,747 --> 00:12:32,739 You may as well not even exist at this school. 144 00:12:34,551 --> 00:12:37,782 Well, I'll run right out and join the wrestling team. 145 00:12:37,855 --> 00:12:42,485 - [Both Chuckle] - Maybe the prep club too. Student council. 146 00:12:42,559 --> 00:12:44,618 Nah. They wouldn't take you. 147 00:12:44,695 --> 00:12:47,926 - I'm hurt. - You know why guys like you knock everything? 148 00:12:47,998 --> 00:12:50,432 This should be stunning. Because you're afraid. 149 00:12:50,501 --> 00:12:54,665 Oh, God. You richies are so smart. That's exactly why I'm not heavy in activities. 150 00:12:54,738 --> 00:12:58,003 - You're a big coward. - I'm in a Math Club. 151 00:12:58,075 --> 00:13:02,409 You're afraid that they won't take you, you don't belong, so you dump all over it. 152 00:13:02,479 --> 00:13:07,781 Well, it wouldn't have anything to do with you activities people being assholes, would it? 153 00:13:07,851 --> 00:13:10,513 Well, you wouldn't know. You don't even know any of us. 154 00:13:10,587 --> 00:13:12,782 Well, I don't know any lepers either... 155 00:13:12,856 --> 00:13:15,188 but I'm not going to run and join one of their fucking clubs. 156 00:13:15,259 --> 00:13:18,057 Hey, let's watch the mouth, huh? I'm in Physics Club too. 157 00:13:18,128 --> 00:13:21,393 Excuse me a sec. What are you babbling about? 158 00:13:21,465 --> 00:13:24,628 What I said was that I'm in the Math Club... 159 00:13:24,701 --> 00:13:27,864 uh, the Latin Club and the Physics Club... Physics Club. 160 00:13:30,340 --> 00:13:32,672 Hey. Cherry. 161 00:13:34,945 --> 00:13:36,845 Do you belong to the Physics Club? 162 00:13:36,914 --> 00:13:40,247 That's an academic club. So? 163 00:13:42,719 --> 00:13:44,846 Academic clubs aren't the same as other kinds of clubs. 164 00:13:44,922 --> 00:13:48,380 Ah, but to dorks like him, they are. 165 00:13:50,427 --> 00:13:52,657 What do you guys do in your club? 166 00:13:52,729 --> 00:13:57,393 In physics, well, we talk about physics. Properties of physics. 167 00:13:57,467 --> 00:14:02,666 So it's sort of social. Demented and sad, but social, right? 168 00:14:02,739 --> 00:14:05,731 [Johnson] I guess you could consider it a social situation. 169 00:14:05,809 --> 00:14:10,439 Um, I mean, there are other children in my club. And, uh... 170 00:14:10,514 --> 00:14:14,712 at the end of the year, we have, um, we have a big banquet at the Hilton. 171 00:14:14,785 --> 00:14:17,049 You load up. You party. 172 00:14:17,120 --> 00:14:21,750 No. We get dressed up, but we don't get high. 173 00:14:21,825 --> 00:14:26,125 - Only burners like you get high. - And I didn't have any shoes, so I had to borrow my dad's. 174 00:14:26,196 --> 00:14:28,858 It's weird 'cause my mom doesn't like me to wear other people's shoes. 175 00:14:28,932 --> 00:14:33,062 My counsel kent... My cousin Kendall from Indiana, he got high once. 176 00:14:33,136 --> 00:14:35,969 And, you know, he started eating, like, really weird foods. 177 00:14:36,039 --> 00:14:40,032 Then he felt like he didn't belong anywhere, kind of like Twilight Zone, kinda? 178 00:14:40,110 --> 00:14:43,944 - [Laughs] Sounds like you. - You guys keep up your talking and Vernon's gonna come in. 179 00:14:44,014 --> 00:14:47,541 I got a meet this Saturday, and I'm not gonna miss it on account of you boneheads. 180 00:14:47,618 --> 00:14:49,711 Oh, and wouldn't that be a bite? [Grunts] 181 00:14:49,786 --> 00:14:51,720 Missing a whole wrestling meet? 182 00:14:51,788 --> 00:14:53,881 You wouldn't know anything about it, faggot. 183 00:14:53,957 --> 00:14:55,948 You never competed in your whole life. 184 00:14:56,026 --> 00:14:58,688 [Mock Crying] Oh, I know. I feel all empty inside because of it. 185 00:14:58,762 --> 00:15:03,290 I have such a deep admiration for guys who roll around on the floor with other guys. 186 00:15:03,367 --> 00:15:07,770 You'd never miss it. You don't have any goals. Oh, but I do. 187 00:15:07,838 --> 00:15:10,329 I want to be just like you. 188 00:15:10,407 --> 00:15:13,467 I figure all I need's a lobotomy and some tights. 189 00:15:15,412 --> 00:15:17,403 You wear tights? 190 00:15:17,481 --> 00:15:20,814 No, I don't wear tights. 191 00:15:20,884 --> 00:15:23,682 - I wear the required uniform. - Tights. 192 00:15:23,754 --> 00:15:26,222 Shut up. 193 00:15:38,702 --> 00:15:42,035 [Snorts] Woo! 194 00:15:45,375 --> 00:15:47,866 [Johnson] There's not supposed to be any monkey business. 195 00:15:47,945 --> 00:15:50,607 Young man, have you finished your paper? 196 00:15:55,018 --> 00:15:57,043 [Boy] Come on, Bender. Don't screw around. 197 00:15:57,120 --> 00:15:59,350 What are you going to do? Drop dead, I hope. 198 00:15:59,423 --> 00:16:01,584 [Water Running] 199 00:16:08,832 --> 00:16:11,062 [Shouts, Indistinct] All right! 200 00:16:11,134 --> 00:16:15,298 Bender, that's-that's school property there, and it doesn't belong to us. 201 00:16:15,372 --> 00:16:18,739 - It's something not to be toyed with. - That's very funny. Fix it. 202 00:16:18,809 --> 00:16:20,970 You should really fix that. Am I a genius? 203 00:16:21,044 --> 00:16:23,535 No, you're an asshole. Fix the door, Bender. What a funny guy. 204 00:16:23,613 --> 00:16:26,548 Everyone, just shh. I've been here before. I know what I'm doing. 205 00:16:26,616 --> 00:16:28,914 [Boy] No. Fix the door.! [Bender] Shut up.! 206 00:16:28,986 --> 00:16:31,511 Goddamn it.! 207 00:16:34,624 --> 00:16:37,115 Why is that door closed? 208 00:16:40,597 --> 00:16:44,089 Why is that door closed? How are we supposed to know? We're not supposed to move. 209 00:16:46,003 --> 00:16:51,339 - Why? - We're just sitting here like we're supposed to. 210 00:16:55,779 --> 00:16:58,270 Who closed that door? 211 00:16:59,750 --> 00:17:02,446 - I think a screw fell out of it. - It just closed, sir. 212 00:17:04,254 --> 00:17:06,779 Who? [Squeaks] 213 00:17:06,857 --> 00:17:10,224 - She doesn't talk, sir. - [Girl Squeaks] 214 00:17:10,293 --> 00:17:13,228 - [Vernon] Give me that screw. - I don't have it. 215 00:17:13,296 --> 00:17:15,594 You want me to yank you out of that seat? 216 00:17:15,665 --> 00:17:19,692 I don't have it. Screws fall out all the time. The world's an imperfect place. 217 00:17:19,770 --> 00:17:21,635 Give it to me, Bender. 218 00:17:21,705 --> 00:17:24,037 Excuse me, sir. Why would anybody want to steal a screw? 219 00:17:24,107 --> 00:17:27,406 Watch it, young lady. 220 00:17:29,312 --> 00:17:32,941 [Door Opens] 221 00:17:36,386 --> 00:17:38,445 The door's way too heavy, sir. 222 00:17:45,295 --> 00:17:47,923 [Vernon] Damn it.! [Clattering] 223 00:17:52,969 --> 00:17:56,132 Andrew Clark, get up here. 224 00:17:56,206 --> 00:18:00,142 [Snaps Fingers] Come on. Front and center. Let's go. 225 00:18:00,210 --> 00:18:02,701 - Hey, how come Andrew gets to get up? - That's right. 226 00:18:02,779 --> 00:18:06,306 If he gets up, we'll all get up. It'll be anarchy.! 227 00:18:07,818 --> 00:18:11,276 Watch-Watch the magazines. It's out of my hands. 228 00:18:15,125 --> 00:18:20,620 That's very clever, sir, but what if there's a fire? 229 00:18:20,697 --> 00:18:25,157 I think violating fire codes and endangering the lives of children... 230 00:18:25,235 --> 00:18:27,396 would be unwise at this juncture in your career, sir. 231 00:18:27,471 --> 00:18:30,963 All right. What are you doing with this? Get this out of here, for God's sake. 232 00:18:31,041 --> 00:18:33,509 What's the matter with you? Come on. 233 00:18:33,577 --> 00:18:36,512 You know, the school comes equipped with fire exits at either end of the library. 234 00:18:36,580 --> 00:18:39,981 - Show Dick some respect. - Let's go. 235 00:18:40,050 --> 00:18:42,518 Go. Get back in your seat. 236 00:18:45,122 --> 00:18:48,683 I expected a little more from a varsity letterman. 237 00:18:49,759 --> 00:18:51,954 You're not fooling anybody, Bender. 238 00:18:52,028 --> 00:18:55,794 The next screw that falls out is gonna be you. 239 00:18:55,866 --> 00:18:59,962 - Eat my shorts. - What was that? 240 00:19:02,139 --> 00:19:05,540 Eat... my... shorts. 241 00:19:05,609 --> 00:19:08,578 You just bought yourself another Saturday, mister. 242 00:19:08,645 --> 00:19:11,170 - Oh, I'm crushed. - You just bought one more right there. 243 00:19:11,248 --> 00:19:15,184 Well, I'm free the Saturday after that. Beyond that, I'll have to check my calendar. 244 00:19:15,252 --> 00:19:18,016 Good! Because it's gonna be filled. We'll keep going. 245 00:19:18,088 --> 00:19:21,819 You want another one? Say the word. Just say the word. 246 00:19:21,892 --> 00:19:25,726 Instead of going to prison, you'll come here. 247 00:19:25,795 --> 00:19:27,888 - Are you through? - No. 248 00:19:27,964 --> 00:19:31,661 I'm doing society a favor. That's another right now. So? 249 00:19:31,735 --> 00:19:34,568 I've got you for the rest of your life if you don't watch your step. 250 00:19:34,638 --> 00:19:36,629 You want another one? Yes. 251 00:19:36,706 --> 00:19:39,869 You got it.! You got another one right there. That's another one, pal. 252 00:19:39,943 --> 00:19:42,002 Cut it out! 253 00:19:42,078 --> 00:19:44,308 - [Mouthing] Stop. - You through? 254 00:19:44,381 --> 00:19:47,373 Not even close, bud. 255 00:19:47,450 --> 00:19:50,544 - You got one more right there. - You really think I give a shit? 256 00:19:50,620 --> 00:19:52,588 Another. 257 00:19:53,790 --> 00:19:56,850 - You through? - How many is that? 258 00:19:56,927 --> 00:19:59,589 That's seven, including the one when you asked Mr. Vernon here... 259 00:19:59,663 --> 00:20:01,858 whether Barry Manilow knew he raided his closet. 260 00:20:01,932 --> 00:20:04,423 - Now it's eight. Stay out of it. - Excuse me, sir. It's seven. 261 00:20:04,501 --> 00:20:07,026 Shut up, peewee. 262 00:20:10,273 --> 00:20:14,573 You're mine, Bender. For two months, I got ya. 263 00:20:14,644 --> 00:20:17,112 I got ya. 264 00:20:17,180 --> 00:20:20,081 What can I say? I'm thrilled. 265 00:20:20,150 --> 00:20:24,086 Oh, I sure that's exactly what you want these people to believe. You know something? 266 00:20:24,154 --> 00:20:27,351 You ought to spend a little more time trying to do something with yourself... 267 00:20:27,424 --> 00:20:30,291 and a little less time trying to impress people. 268 00:20:30,360 --> 00:20:34,091 You might be better off. All right. That's it! 269 00:20:34,164 --> 00:20:36,394 I'm gonna be right outside those doors. 270 00:20:36,466 --> 00:20:41,062 The next time I have to come in here, I'm cracking skulls. 271 00:20:53,316 --> 00:20:55,409 Fuck you! 272 00:20:59,589 --> 00:21:01,921 [Sighs] 273 00:21:04,361 --> 00:21:06,352 Fuck. 274 00:22:47,597 --> 00:22:49,588 Wake up! 275 00:22:53,103 --> 00:22:55,196 Who has to go to the lavatory? 276 00:23:14,124 --> 00:23:17,855 - That's real intelligent. - You're right. 277 00:23:17,927 --> 00:23:19,918 It's wrong to destroy literature. 278 00:23:19,996 --> 00:23:22,829 It's such fun to read. 279 00:23:22,899 --> 00:23:25,231 And... 280 00:23:27,670 --> 00:23:30,764 "Molay" really pumps my nads. 281 00:23:30,840 --> 00:23:33,570 Moliere. 282 00:23:34,878 --> 00:23:36,937 I love his work. 283 00:23:45,722 --> 00:23:50,091 Big deal. Nothing to do when you're locked in a vacancy. 284 00:23:50,160 --> 00:23:52,128 Speak for yourself. 285 00:23:52,195 --> 00:23:57,861 Do you think I'd speak for you? I don't even know your language. 286 00:23:57,934 --> 00:24:01,665 Hey, you grounded tonight? 287 00:24:01,738 --> 00:24:06,198 I don't know. My mom said I was. My dad told me just to blow her off. 288 00:24:10,847 --> 00:24:14,305 There's a big party at Stubby's. His parents are in Europe. 289 00:24:14,384 --> 00:24:17,842 It should be pretty wild. Are you going to go? Yeah? 290 00:24:19,589 --> 00:24:21,682 - I doubt it. - How come? 291 00:24:21,758 --> 00:24:25,751 'Cause if I do what my mother tells me not to do, it's because my father says it's okay. 292 00:24:25,829 --> 00:24:29,162 It's like this whole, big monster deal. It's endless. It's a total drag. 293 00:24:29,232 --> 00:24:31,166 It's like, any minute, divorce. 294 00:24:31,234 --> 00:24:34,692 - Who do you like better? - What? 295 00:24:34,771 --> 00:24:37,899 - You like your old man better than your mom? - They're both screwed. 296 00:24:37,974 --> 00:24:40,465 No, I mean, if you had to choose between 'em. 297 00:24:42,679 --> 00:24:46,342 I don't know. Probably go live with my brother. 298 00:24:48,751 --> 00:24:51,720 I mean, I don't think either one of them gives a shit about me. 299 00:24:51,788 --> 00:24:54,916 - It's like they use me to get back at each other. - Ha! 300 00:25:03,833 --> 00:25:07,496 - Shut up! - You're just feeling sorry for yourself. 301 00:25:07,570 --> 00:25:09,936 Yeah, if I didn't, nobody else would. 302 00:25:10,006 --> 00:25:12,566 Oh, you're breaking my heart. What? Sporto? 303 00:25:15,645 --> 00:25:17,579 You get along with your parents? 304 00:25:17,647 --> 00:25:20,241 Well, If I say yes, I'm an idiot, right? 305 00:25:22,585 --> 00:25:24,712 You're an idiot anyway. 306 00:25:24,787 --> 00:25:28,450 But if you say you get along with your parents, well, you're a liar too. 307 00:25:36,633 --> 00:25:40,626 You know something, man? If we weren't in school, I'd waste you. 308 00:25:40,703 --> 00:25:43,536 Can you hear this? 309 00:25:43,606 --> 00:25:47,269 You want me to turn it up? 310 00:25:47,343 --> 00:25:50,506 Hey, fellas, I mean... 311 00:25:50,580 --> 00:25:53,879 I don't like my parents, either. I mean, I don't... 312 00:25:53,950 --> 00:25:58,717 I don't get along with them when their idea of parental compassion... 313 00:25:58,788 --> 00:26:02,451 is just, you know, wacko, you know. 314 00:26:02,525 --> 00:26:04,925 Dork. Yeah? 315 00:26:04,994 --> 00:26:07,986 You are a parent's wet dream, okay? 316 00:26:10,833 --> 00:26:14,496 That's the problem. Look, I can see you getting all bunged up... 317 00:26:14,571 --> 00:26:16,903 for them making you wear these kind of clothes... 318 00:26:16,973 --> 00:26:20,636 but, face it, you're a neo-maxi-zoon-dweebie. 319 00:26:20,710 --> 00:26:23,543 What would you be doing if you weren't out making yourself a better citizen? 320 00:26:23,613 --> 00:26:26,776 Why do you have to insult everybody? 321 00:26:26,849 --> 00:26:29,340 I'm being honest, asshole. 322 00:26:29,419 --> 00:26:32,582 I would expect you to know the difference. 323 00:26:32,655 --> 00:26:35,488 Well, he's got a name. Yeah. Yeah? 324 00:26:35,558 --> 00:26:37,958 What's your name? Brian. 325 00:26:38,027 --> 00:26:41,258 See? My condolences. 326 00:26:43,766 --> 00:26:46,257 What's your name? 327 00:26:48,638 --> 00:26:51,334 What's yours? 328 00:26:51,407 --> 00:26:53,534 - Claire. - Claire? 329 00:26:53,610 --> 00:26:55,635 Claire. It's a family name. 330 00:26:55,712 --> 00:26:58,510 - Oh. It's a fat girl's name. - Oh, thank you. 331 00:26:58,581 --> 00:27:00,606 You're welcome. I'm not fat. 332 00:27:00,683 --> 00:27:02,981 Not at present, but I can see you really pushing maximum density. 333 00:27:03,052 --> 00:27:07,546 You see, I'm not sure if you know this, but there are two kinds of fat people... 334 00:27:07,624 --> 00:27:11,116 there's fat people that were born to be fat... 335 00:27:11,194 --> 00:27:14,857 and there's fat people that were once thin, but they became fat. 336 00:27:14,931 --> 00:27:18,731 So when you look at them, you can sort of see that thin person inside. 337 00:27:18,801 --> 00:27:20,735 You see, you're gonna get married. 338 00:27:20,803 --> 00:27:23,863 You're gonna squeeze out a few puppies, and then... 339 00:27:23,940 --> 00:27:25,874 [Grunting] 340 00:27:27,443 --> 00:27:31,971 Oh. Obscene finger gestures from such a pristine girl. 341 00:27:32,048 --> 00:27:35,040 I'm not that pristine. 342 00:27:38,254 --> 00:27:40,188 Are you a virgin? 343 00:27:42,225 --> 00:27:46,321 I'll bet you a million dollars that you are. 344 00:27:48,731 --> 00:27:50,665 Let's end the suspense. 345 00:27:50,733 --> 00:27:54,692 Is it going to be a white wedding? 346 00:27:54,771 --> 00:27:56,864 Why don't you just shut up. 347 00:27:56,939 --> 00:27:58,907 Have you ever kissed a boy on the mouth? 348 00:28:01,711 --> 00:28:04,373 Have you ever been felt up... 349 00:28:04,447 --> 00:28:08,076 over the bra, under the blouse... 350 00:28:08,151 --> 00:28:10,016 your shoes off... 351 00:28:10,086 --> 00:28:12,680 hoping to God your parents don't walk in? 352 00:28:15,124 --> 00:28:17,183 Do you want me to puke? 353 00:28:19,062 --> 00:28:21,394 Over the panties... 354 00:28:22,765 --> 00:28:24,699 no bra... 355 00:28:26,602 --> 00:28:31,596 blouse unbuttoned, Calvin's in a ball on the front seat... 356 00:28:31,674 --> 00:28:34,108 past 11:00 on a school night? 357 00:28:35,378 --> 00:28:38,040 [Andrew] Leave her alone. 358 00:28:47,190 --> 00:28:49,488 I said leave her alone. 359 00:28:52,328 --> 00:28:55,320 - You gonna make me? - Yeah. 360 00:29:03,439 --> 00:29:06,602 You and how many of your friends? 361 00:29:06,676 --> 00:29:08,837 Just me. 362 00:29:08,911 --> 00:29:12,074 Just you and me. Two hits. 363 00:29:12,148 --> 00:29:15,311 Me hitting you. You hitting the floor. Anytime you're ready, pal. 364 00:29:24,160 --> 00:29:28,324 I don't want to get into this, man. 365 00:29:28,397 --> 00:29:30,558 Why not? 366 00:29:30,633 --> 00:29:32,965 Because I'd kill you. 367 00:29:35,772 --> 00:29:39,401 It's real simple. I'd kill you... 368 00:29:39,475 --> 00:29:42,467 and your fucking parents would sue me, and it'd be a big mess. 369 00:29:42,545 --> 00:29:46,709 I don't care enough about you to bother. 370 00:29:46,783 --> 00:29:49,616 Chickenshit. [Switchblade Clicks] 371 00:29:59,695 --> 00:30:02,289 Let's end this right now. 372 00:30:02,365 --> 00:30:06,631 You don't talk to her. You don't look at her. 373 00:30:06,702 --> 00:30:08,966 And you don't even think about her! You understand me? 374 00:30:10,406 --> 00:30:12,340 I'm trying to help her. 375 00:30:17,246 --> 00:30:20,238 (music)[Radio] 376 00:30:34,330 --> 00:30:36,264 Brian, how you doing? 377 00:30:38,634 --> 00:30:42,195 Your dad work here? 378 00:30:46,242 --> 00:30:47,834 Uh, Carl? What? 379 00:30:47,910 --> 00:30:51,073 Can I ask you a question? Sure. 380 00:30:51,147 --> 00:30:54,674 - How does one become a janitor? - You want to be a janitor? 381 00:30:54,750 --> 00:30:58,743 No. I just want to know how one becomes a janitor, because Andrew here... 382 00:30:58,821 --> 00:31:02,587 is very interested in pursuing a career in the custodial arts. 383 00:31:02,658 --> 00:31:05,718 Oh, really? 384 00:31:07,630 --> 00:31:10,758 You guys think I'm some untouchable peasant, serf, peon, you know? 385 00:31:10,833 --> 00:31:15,236 Maybe so. But following a broom around after shitheads like you... 386 00:31:15,304 --> 00:31:17,534 for the last eight years, I've learned a couple of things. 387 00:31:17,607 --> 00:31:22,544 I look through your letters. I look through your lockers. 388 00:31:22,612 --> 00:31:25,775 I listen to your conversations. You don't know that, but I do. 389 00:31:25,848 --> 00:31:31,150 I am the eyes and ears of this institution, my friends. 390 00:31:33,823 --> 00:31:36,121 By the way, that clock's 20 minutes fast. 391 00:31:36,192 --> 00:31:40,288 [Andrew Chuckles] Shit. 392 00:31:46,636 --> 00:31:50,003 [Music][music] [Whistling] 393 00:31:55,244 --> 00:31:59,146 [Music][music] [Whistling] 394 00:32:02,752 --> 00:32:07,086 [Music][music] [All Whistling] 395 00:32:17,833 --> 00:32:20,301 [Whistling "Beethoven's Fifth Symphony"] 396 00:32:25,441 --> 00:32:28,205 All right, girls. That's 30 minutes for lunch. 397 00:32:28,277 --> 00:32:30,939 Here? Here. 398 00:32:31,013 --> 00:32:34,312 I think the cafeteria would be a more suitable place for us to eat lunch in. 399 00:32:34,383 --> 00:32:38,786 I don't care what you think, Andrew. Uh, Dick? 400 00:32:38,854 --> 00:32:42,688 Excuse me, Rich. Will milk be made available to us? 401 00:32:42,758 --> 00:32:47,161 - We're extremely thirsty. Sir. - I have a really low tolerance for dehydration. 402 00:32:47,229 --> 00:32:49,993 I've seen her dehydrated, sir. It's pretty gross. 403 00:32:50,066 --> 00:32:54,002 Relax. I'll get it. Ah-ah-ah. 404 00:32:54,070 --> 00:32:56,868 Grab some wood there, bub. 405 00:32:56,939 --> 00:33:00,500 What do you think, I was born yesterday? 406 00:33:00,576 --> 00:33:04,307 You think I'm going to have you roaming these halls? 407 00:33:04,380 --> 00:33:07,577 - You. - [Sighs] 408 00:33:11,787 --> 00:33:15,518 And you. Hey! 409 00:33:15,591 --> 00:33:18,082 [Snaps Fingers] What's her name? Wake her up. 410 00:33:18,160 --> 00:33:22,221 Hey, come on. On your feet, missy, Let's go! This is no rest home. 411 00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:28,364 There's a soft drink machine in the teachers' lounge. Let's go. 412 00:33:33,342 --> 00:33:36,175 So... what's your poison? 413 00:33:38,681 --> 00:33:41,013 What do you drink? 414 00:33:42,985 --> 00:33:45,146 Okay. Forget I asked. 415 00:33:47,089 --> 00:33:49,250 Vodka. 416 00:33:50,526 --> 00:33:54,053 Vodka? When do you drink vodka? 417 00:33:54,130 --> 00:33:56,462 Whenever. 418 00:33:57,466 --> 00:34:00,299 A lot? Tons. 419 00:34:00,369 --> 00:34:03,702 Is that why you're here today? 420 00:34:03,773 --> 00:34:06,264 Why are you here? Why are you here? 421 00:34:10,379 --> 00:34:12,540 Um... 422 00:34:14,216 --> 00:34:17,708 I'm here today because, uh... 423 00:34:17,787 --> 00:34:21,917 because my coach and my father don't want me to blow my ride. 424 00:34:21,991 --> 00:34:25,984 I get treated differently because, uh, coach thinks I'm a winner. 425 00:34:26,062 --> 00:34:28,121 So does my old man. 426 00:34:28,197 --> 00:34:30,757 I'm not a winner because I want to be one. 427 00:34:30,833 --> 00:34:34,826 I'm a winner because I got strength and speed, kind of like a racehorse. 428 00:34:36,839 --> 00:34:40,605 That's about how involved I am in what's happening to me. Yeah? 429 00:34:40,676 --> 00:34:44,635 That's very interesting. 430 00:34:46,715 --> 00:34:49,775 Now why don't you tell me why you're really in here. 431 00:34:49,852 --> 00:34:53,185 [Scoffs] Forget it. 432 00:34:59,161 --> 00:35:03,621 Claire? Want to see a picture of a guy with elephantiasis of the nuts? 433 00:35:03,699 --> 00:35:06,361 It's pretty tasty. No, thank you. 434 00:35:06,435 --> 00:35:10,166 How do you think he rides a bike? 435 00:35:11,507 --> 00:35:15,443 Claire? Would you consider dating a guy like this? 436 00:35:15,511 --> 00:35:19,003 - Can't you just leave me alone? - I mean, if he had a great personality... 437 00:35:19,081 --> 00:35:21,811 was a good dancer and had a cool car? 438 00:35:21,884 --> 00:35:24,876 You'd probably have to ride in the backseat because his nuts would ride shotgun. 439 00:35:27,623 --> 00:35:29,614 [Sighs] You know what I wish I was doing? 440 00:35:29,692 --> 00:35:32,217 Watch what you say. Brian here is a cherry. 441 00:35:32,294 --> 00:35:35,024 - A cherry? - I wish I was in a plane... 442 00:35:35,097 --> 00:35:38,396 - to France. - I'm not a cherry. 443 00:35:38,467 --> 00:35:42,130 - When have you ever gotten laid? - I've laid lots of times. 444 00:35:42,204 --> 00:35:46,004 - Name one. - She lives in Canada. 445 00:35:46,075 --> 00:35:49,567 I met her at Niagara Falls. You wouldn't know her. 446 00:35:49,645 --> 00:35:52,307 Ever laid anyone around here? 447 00:35:52,381 --> 00:35:56,715 Oh. You and Claire did it? 448 00:35:56,785 --> 00:35:59,948 - What are you talking about? - Nothing. Nothing. 449 00:36:00,022 --> 00:36:02,183 Let's just drop it, okay? We'll talk about it later. 450 00:36:02,258 --> 00:36:04,726 - What are you talking about? - Brian's trying to tell me... 451 00:36:04,793 --> 00:36:08,058 that in addition to the number of girls in the Niagara Falls area... 452 00:36:08,130 --> 00:36:12,032 that presently you and he are riding the hobby horse. 453 00:36:12,101 --> 00:36:14,592 - Little pig. - No, I'm not. 454 00:36:14,670 --> 00:36:17,901 John said I was a cherry, and I said I wasn't. That's all that was said. 455 00:36:17,973 --> 00:36:20,737 Then what were you motioning to Claire for? 456 00:36:20,809 --> 00:36:24,768 - I don't appreciate this very much, Brian. - He is lying. 457 00:36:24,847 --> 00:36:28,078 You weren't motioning to Claire? 458 00:36:28,150 --> 00:36:31,881 You know he's lying, right? Were you or were you not motioning to Claire? 459 00:36:31,954 --> 00:36:35,446 Yeah, but it was only... 460 00:36:35,524 --> 00:36:38,425 It was only because I didn't want her to know I was a virgin. 461 00:36:39,662 --> 00:36:41,857 Excuse me for being a virgin. I'm sorry. 462 00:36:41,931 --> 00:36:44,866 [Scoffs] Why didn't you want me to know you were a virgin? 463 00:36:44,934 --> 00:36:48,131 Because it's personal business. It's my personal, private business. 464 00:36:48,204 --> 00:36:50,468 Well, Brian, it doesn't sound like you're doing any business. 465 00:36:50,539 --> 00:36:53,235 I think it's okay for a guy to be a virgin. 466 00:36:54,677 --> 00:36:56,941 You do? 467 00:37:07,189 --> 00:37:09,350 What's in there? 468 00:37:09,425 --> 00:37:13,122 Guess. Where's your lunch? 469 00:37:13,195 --> 00:37:16,187 You're wearing it. You're nauseating. 470 00:37:30,713 --> 00:37:33,238 What's that? 471 00:37:33,315 --> 00:37:36,944 - Sushi. - Sushi? 472 00:37:37,019 --> 00:37:41,319 [Laughs] Rice, raw fish and seaweed. 473 00:37:43,826 --> 00:37:47,421 You won't accept a guy's tongue in your mouth, and you're gonna eat that? 474 00:37:47,496 --> 00:37:50,090 Can I eat? 475 00:37:50,165 --> 00:37:52,599 I don't know. Give it a try. 476 00:38:13,422 --> 00:38:15,356 [Clears Throat] 477 00:38:18,193 --> 00:38:21,128 [Loud Slurping] 478 00:38:29,405 --> 00:38:31,737 [Andrew] What's your problem? 479 00:39:30,699 --> 00:39:32,690 What are we having? 480 00:39:32,768 --> 00:39:35,760 Uh, it's your standard, regular lunch, I guess. 481 00:39:38,440 --> 00:39:40,601 Milk? Soup. 482 00:39:45,347 --> 00:39:47,611 Uh, that's apple juice. I can read. 483 00:39:48,751 --> 00:39:52,209 PB&J with the crusts cut off. 484 00:39:52,287 --> 00:39:55,620 Well, Brian, this is a very nutritious lunch. 485 00:39:55,691 --> 00:39:59,218 All the food groups are represented. 486 00:39:59,294 --> 00:40:02,286 Did your mom marry Mr. Rogers? 487 00:40:02,364 --> 00:40:04,457 No, Mr. Johnson. Hah. 488 00:40:06,635 --> 00:40:11,095 Here's my impression of the life at big Bri's house. 489 00:40:15,577 --> 00:40:19,741 [Deep Voice] Son? [Normal Voice] Yeah, Dad? 490 00:40:19,815 --> 00:40:23,080 How's your day, pal? Great, Dad. 491 00:40:23,152 --> 00:40:25,848 How's yours? Super. 492 00:40:27,322 --> 00:40:32,453 Say, son, how'd you like to go fishing this weekend? 493 00:40:32,528 --> 00:40:37,465 Great, Dad. But I've got homework to do. 494 00:40:37,533 --> 00:40:40,832 That's all right, son. You can do it on the boat. 495 00:40:40,903 --> 00:40:43,736 Gee.! 496 00:40:46,341 --> 00:40:51,973 Dear, isn't our son swell? Yes, dear. 497 00:40:52,047 --> 00:40:55,016 Isn't life swell? 498 00:40:55,083 --> 00:40:57,017 Oh. [Loud Kiss] 499 00:40:57,085 --> 00:40:59,019 Oh. [Loud Kiss] 500 00:40:59,087 --> 00:41:01,612 [Grunts] 501 00:41:07,296 --> 00:41:10,026 All right. What about your family? 502 00:41:10,098 --> 00:41:12,931 Who, mine? It's real easy. Yeah. 503 00:41:21,910 --> 00:41:26,745 [Deep Voice] Stupid, worthless, no-good... 504 00:41:26,815 --> 00:41:30,148 goddamn freeloading son of a bitch. 505 00:41:30,219 --> 00:41:33,882 Retarded, big mouth, know-it-all, asshole, jerk. 506 00:41:36,458 --> 00:41:40,622 [High Voice] You forgot ugly, lazy and disrespectful. 507 00:41:40,696 --> 00:41:44,359 Shut up, bitch! Go fix me a turkey potpie. 508 00:41:44,433 --> 00:41:48,870 What about you, Dad? [Deep Voice] Fuck you. 509 00:41:48,937 --> 00:41:51,804 No, Dad. What about you? Fuck you! 510 00:41:51,874 --> 00:41:55,207 No, Dad. What about you? Fuck you! 511 00:41:55,277 --> 00:41:57,211 Bam! 512 00:41:59,948 --> 00:42:03,213 - Is that for real? - You want to come over sometime? 513 00:42:03,285 --> 00:42:05,685 That's bullshit. It's all part of your image. 514 00:42:05,754 --> 00:42:08,279 - I don't believe a word of it. - You don't believe me? 515 00:42:08,357 --> 00:42:10,291 No. No? 516 00:42:10,359 --> 00:42:12,486 Did I stutter? 517 00:42:19,868 --> 00:42:23,269 Do you believe this? Huh? 518 00:42:24,973 --> 00:42:28,875 It's about the size of a cigar. Do I stutter? 519 00:42:28,944 --> 00:42:33,244 See, this is what you get in my house when you spill paint in the garage. 520 00:42:36,151 --> 00:42:40,485 I don't think that I need to sit with you fucking dildos anymore. 521 00:42:47,029 --> 00:42:49,497 [Yelling] 522 00:42:49,565 --> 00:42:51,897 Fuck! 523 00:43:12,054 --> 00:43:14,887 - You shouldn't have said that. - How did I know? 524 00:43:16,525 --> 00:43:18,459 I mean he lies about everything anyway. 525 00:43:36,945 --> 00:43:39,675 Oh, shit. 526 00:43:39,748 --> 00:43:44,583 Coffee. Looks like it's been scraped off the bottom of the Mississippi River. 527 00:43:46,588 --> 00:43:48,579 Everything's polluted. Everything's polluted. 528 00:43:48,657 --> 00:43:51,649 The coffee's polluted. The kids are polluted. 529 00:44:03,972 --> 00:44:07,499 How do you know where Vernon went? I don't. 530 00:44:07,576 --> 00:44:11,068 Then how do you know when he'll be back? I don't. 531 00:44:12,981 --> 00:44:15,643 Being bad feels pretty good. Huh? 532 00:44:17,953 --> 00:44:21,445 What's the point of going to Bender's locker? Beats me. 533 00:44:21,523 --> 00:44:26,187 This is so stupid. Why are we risking getting caught? 534 00:44:26,261 --> 00:44:28,752 I don't know. 535 00:44:28,830 --> 00:44:31,924 So then what are we doing? You ask me one more question... 536 00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:35,265 and I'm beating the shit out of you. Sorry. 537 00:44:40,442 --> 00:44:44,276 You're such a slob. My maid's on vacation. 538 00:44:58,326 --> 00:45:02,490 [Sniffing] It's drugs. 539 00:45:02,564 --> 00:45:04,532 Screw that, Bender. Put it back. 540 00:45:04,599 --> 00:45:07,261 Drugs. The boy has marijuana. 541 00:45:09,271 --> 00:45:12,604 That was marijuana. Shut up, dick. 542 00:45:14,209 --> 00:45:16,200 Do you approve of this? 543 00:45:27,622 --> 00:45:30,090 [Bender] We'll cross through the lab, and then we'll double back. 544 00:45:30,158 --> 00:45:33,491 [Andrew] You better be right. If Vernon cuts us off, it's your fault, asshole. 545 00:45:33,562 --> 00:45:36,224 [Brian] What did he say? Where are we going? 546 00:45:57,052 --> 00:46:01,079 (music)Hot on the run from the grip of the power game (music) 547 00:46:02,691 --> 00:46:08,857 (music) The man who leads the way The man who leads the way (music) 548 00:46:08,930 --> 00:46:13,594 (music)Shell in its box from his home that they'll never tame (music) 549 00:46:13,668 --> 00:46:19,766 (music) The man who leads the way The man who leads the way (music) 550 00:46:19,841 --> 00:46:21,832 Wait. Wait. Hold it. Hold it. 551 00:46:21,910 --> 00:46:24,105 We have to go through the cafeteria. No, the activities hall. 552 00:46:24,179 --> 00:46:26,739 Hey, man, you don't know what you're talking about. You don't know. 553 00:46:26,815 --> 00:46:30,376 We're through listening to you. We're going this way. 554 00:46:30,452 --> 00:46:33,944 You go where you want, mother hen. Come on! 555 00:46:36,758 --> 00:46:39,192 (music)He is burning (music) 556 00:46:40,529 --> 00:46:42,793 (music)Burning in the twilight (music) 557 00:46:42,864 --> 00:46:47,563 (music)He is turning Turning to face us (music) 558 00:46:47,636 --> 00:46:52,130 (music)He is burning (music) 559 00:46:52,207 --> 00:46:56,303 (music)Fire in the twilight (music) 560 00:46:56,378 --> 00:46:59,211 Shit! Fuck you. Great idea, jag-off. 561 00:46:59,281 --> 00:47:01,272 Fuck you. Why didn't you listen to John? 562 00:47:01,349 --> 00:47:03,579 We're dead. 563 00:47:03,652 --> 00:47:08,316 No. Just me. What do you mean? 564 00:47:08,390 --> 00:47:12,383 Get back to the library. Keep your unit out of it. 565 00:47:12,460 --> 00:47:16,191 [Music] I wanna be an airborne ranger [music] 566 00:47:16,264 --> 00:47:20,030 (music)I wanna be an airborne ranger (music) 567 00:47:20,101 --> 00:47:23,593 - That son of a bitch. - [Music] Before the day I die [music] 568 00:47:23,672 --> 00:47:26,300 [Music] There's five things I want to ride [music] 569 00:47:26,374 --> 00:47:28,899 [Music] Bicycle, tricycle automobile [music] 570 00:47:28,977 --> 00:47:32,504 (music) Virgin's mother and a Ferris wheel (music) 571 00:47:36,084 --> 00:47:40,077 [Music] I wanna be an airborne ranger [music] 572 00:47:40,155 --> 00:47:43,818 (music)[Continues, Indistinct] [Panting] 573 00:47:44,993 --> 00:47:47,860 [Ball Bouncing] 574 00:47:47,929 --> 00:47:51,126 [Yelling] Three... 575 00:47:51,199 --> 00:47:54,168 two, one.! 576 00:47:54,236 --> 00:47:56,170 [Yells] 577 00:47:56,238 --> 00:47:59,537 Bender! Bender! What is this? 578 00:47:59,608 --> 00:48:01,940 What are you doing here? What is this? Hi. 579 00:48:04,446 --> 00:48:07,609 Out. That's it, Bender. Out. It's over. 580 00:48:07,682 --> 00:48:10,913 Don't you want to hear my excuse? Out. 581 00:48:10,986 --> 00:48:13,318 I'm thinking of trying out for a scholarship. 582 00:48:13,388 --> 00:48:16,880 Give me the ball, Bender. Give me that ball. 583 00:48:34,743 --> 00:48:38,736 Get your stuff. Let's go. 584 00:48:38,813 --> 00:48:42,647 Mr. Wise Guy here's taken upon himself to go to the gymnasium. 585 00:48:42,717 --> 00:48:46,949 I'm sorry to inform you, you're going to be without his services the rest of the day. 586 00:48:47,022 --> 00:48:50,116 B-O-O H-O-O. 587 00:48:50,191 --> 00:48:53,592 Everything's a big joke, huh, Bender? The false alarm you pulled Friday... 588 00:48:53,662 --> 00:48:56,927 False alarms are really funny, aren't they? 589 00:48:56,998 --> 00:49:00,297 What if your home... What if your family... 590 00:49:00,368 --> 00:49:02,302 What if your dope was on fire? 591 00:49:02,370 --> 00:49:06,636 Impossible, sir. It's in Johnson's underwear. 592 00:49:06,708 --> 00:49:08,767 [Chuckles] You think he's funny? 593 00:49:08,843 --> 00:49:12,643 You think this is cute? You think he's bitchin'? Is that it? 594 00:49:12,714 --> 00:49:17,481 Let me tell you something. Look at him. 595 00:49:17,552 --> 00:49:19,611 He's a bum. 596 00:49:19,688 --> 00:49:22,885 You want to see something funny? You go visit John Bender in five years. 597 00:49:22,958 --> 00:49:26,553 You'll see how goddamn funny he is. 598 00:49:33,468 --> 00:49:37,131 What's the matter, John? You going to cry? 599 00:49:38,740 --> 00:49:43,575 Let's go. Keep your fuckin' hands off me! 600 00:49:43,645 --> 00:49:46,978 I expect better manners from you, Dick. 601 00:49:48,850 --> 00:49:50,841 For better hallway vision. 602 00:50:01,596 --> 00:50:03,894 That's the last time, Bender. 603 00:50:03,965 --> 00:50:07,264 That's the last time you ever make me look bad in front of those kids. You hear me? 604 00:50:07,335 --> 00:50:10,065 I make $31,000 a year, and I've got a home. 605 00:50:10,138 --> 00:50:12,698 And I'm not about to throw it away on some punk like you. 606 00:50:12,774 --> 00:50:14,867 But someday, man, someday... 607 00:50:14,943 --> 00:50:17,605 when you're outta here and you've forgotten all about this place... 608 00:50:17,679 --> 00:50:21,775 and they've forgotten about you, and you're wrapped up in your own pathetic life... 609 00:50:21,850 --> 00:50:24,375 I'm gonna be there. 610 00:50:24,452 --> 00:50:28,445 That's right. And I'm gonna kick the livin' shit out of you. 611 00:50:28,523 --> 00:50:30,582 I'm gonna knock your dick in the dirt. 612 00:50:33,895 --> 00:50:37,695 - You threatening me? - What are you going to do about it? 613 00:50:39,868 --> 00:50:41,859 You think anybody's gonna believe you? 614 00:50:43,171 --> 00:50:46,937 You think anybody is gonna take your word over mine? 615 00:50:48,576 --> 00:50:51,067 I'm a man of respect around here. They love me around here. 616 00:50:51,146 --> 00:50:55,446 I'm a swell guy. You're a lying sack of shit, and everybody knows it. 617 00:50:58,086 --> 00:51:01,578 You're a real tough guy. Hey, hey. Come on. 618 00:51:01,656 --> 00:51:04,989 Get on your feet, pal! Let's find out how tough you are. 619 00:51:05,060 --> 00:51:07,893 I wanna know, right now, how tough you are. Come on. 620 00:51:07,962 --> 00:51:11,625 I'll give you the first punch. Let's go. Come on. Right here. 621 00:51:11,699 --> 00:51:14,668 Just take the first shot. Please. I'm begging you. Take a shot. Right here. 622 00:51:14,736 --> 00:51:17,569 Just take one shot. That's all I need. 623 00:51:17,639 --> 00:51:19,800 Just one swing. 624 00:51:28,883 --> 00:51:31,943 That's what I thought. 625 00:51:32,020 --> 00:51:35,012 You're a gutless turd. 626 00:51:39,194 --> 00:51:41,253 [Door Closes] 627 00:52:14,395 --> 00:52:17,228 A naked blond walks into a bar... 628 00:52:17,298 --> 00:52:19,789 with a poodle under one arm... 629 00:52:19,868 --> 00:52:23,861 and a two-foot salami under the other. 630 00:52:23,938 --> 00:52:27,271 She lays the poodle on the table. 631 00:52:27,342 --> 00:52:31,005 Bartender says, "I suppose you won't be needing a drink." 632 00:52:31,079 --> 00:52:35,846 Naked lady says... Oh, shit! 633 00:52:37,085 --> 00:52:39,178 [Vernon] Jesus Christ Almighty.! 634 00:52:44,893 --> 00:52:46,918 Forgot my pencil. 635 00:52:51,766 --> 00:52:53,700 [Vernon] Goddamn it.! 636 00:52:55,570 --> 00:52:58,664 What in God's name is going on in here? 637 00:53:00,675 --> 00:53:03,769 - What was that ruckus? - What ruckus? 638 00:53:03,845 --> 00:53:05,710 I was in my office, and I heard a ruckus. 639 00:53:05,780 --> 00:53:07,771 Could you describe the ruckus, sir. 640 00:53:07,849 --> 00:53:11,250 - Watch your tongue, young man. Watch it. - [Groans] 641 00:53:13,354 --> 00:53:16,016 - [Mr. Vernon] What is this? - [Zipping Sound] 642 00:53:16,090 --> 00:53:20,789 - What is that? What-What... What is that noise? - [Andrew] What noise? 643 00:53:20,862 --> 00:53:22,887 [Claire] Really sir, there wasn't any noise. 644 00:53:22,964 --> 00:53:25,228 - [Gasping] - Ow! 645 00:53:25,300 --> 00:53:27,393 [Exaggerated Sneeze] 646 00:53:27,468 --> 00:53:30,232 - [All Coughing] - [Cries Out] 647 00:53:30,305 --> 00:53:33,604 - [Coughing] - [Coughing] 648 00:53:33,675 --> 00:53:35,643 That noise? Was that the noise you were talking about? 649 00:53:35,710 --> 00:53:38,941 No, it wasn't. That was not the noise I was talking about. 650 00:53:39,013 --> 00:53:44,280 Now, I may not have caught you in the act this time, but you can bet I will. 651 00:53:44,352 --> 00:53:46,445 [Laughs] 652 00:53:46,521 --> 00:53:49,251 You make book on that, missy. 653 00:53:49,324 --> 00:53:53,158 And you! I will not be made a fool of. 654 00:53:58,733 --> 00:54:02,396 [Laughing] 655 00:54:09,644 --> 00:54:13,978 It was an accident. You're an asshole. 656 00:54:14,048 --> 00:54:16,209 Sue me. 657 00:54:22,590 --> 00:54:25,081 So, Ahab, can I have all my doobage? 658 00:54:28,162 --> 00:54:30,630 [Zipping Sound] 659 00:54:34,302 --> 00:54:36,827 Yo, wastoid. You're not gonna blaze up in here. 660 00:55:01,929 --> 00:55:05,387 [Clearing Throat] 661 00:55:05,466 --> 00:55:08,663 - [Mouthing Words] - [Mouthing Words] 662 00:55:15,276 --> 00:55:17,210 [Zips Up Zipper] 663 00:55:24,085 --> 00:55:26,986 [Sighs] Shit! 664 00:55:46,140 --> 00:55:48,074 [Sniffles] 665 00:55:49,510 --> 00:55:53,105 [Chortles] 666 00:56:02,857 --> 00:56:05,849 [Coughs] 667 00:56:20,274 --> 00:56:22,936 [Claire Giggling] 668 00:56:23,010 --> 00:56:26,878 Chicks cannot hold their smoke. That's what it is. 669 00:56:30,651 --> 00:56:34,519 Do you know how popular I am? 670 00:56:34,589 --> 00:56:39,458 I am so popular. Everybody loves me so much at this school. 671 00:56:39,527 --> 00:56:42,496 [Brian] Poor baby. [Laughs] 672 00:56:43,564 --> 00:56:45,589 [Brian Coughs, Laughs] 673 00:56:49,604 --> 00:56:52,630 Five. 674 00:56:52,707 --> 00:56:55,835 [Claire Laughs] 675 00:57:12,860 --> 00:57:16,318 Whoo! [Yells] 676 00:57:19,200 --> 00:57:21,293 [Laughing] 677 00:57:27,608 --> 00:57:29,803 [Whistles] 678 00:57:29,877 --> 00:57:33,836 [Grunts, Yells] 679 00:57:35,883 --> 00:57:39,046 Whoo! [Brian Whistles] 680 00:57:43,558 --> 00:57:45,355 [Brian And Claire Laughing] Ow! 681 00:57:45,426 --> 00:57:47,291 [Yells] 682 00:57:47,361 --> 00:57:49,295 [Brian Whistles] 683 00:57:54,836 --> 00:57:57,634 [Yells] 684 00:57:58,873 --> 00:58:00,807 [Claire, Indistinct] 685 00:58:03,411 --> 00:58:07,780 Mr... Oh, Mr. Tierney. 686 00:58:07,849 --> 00:58:12,445 A history of slight mental illness. [Chuckles] 687 00:58:12,520 --> 00:58:16,115 No wonder he's so fucked up. Afternoon, Dick. 688 00:58:16,190 --> 00:58:19,921 [Chuckles] Good. Hey, Carl. How you doing? Good. What's up? 689 00:58:19,994 --> 00:58:23,725 Not much. What's happening? What are you doing in the basement files? 690 00:58:23,798 --> 00:58:26,392 Oh, nothing. Nothing here. Just doing a little homework. 691 00:58:26,467 --> 00:58:28,697 Homework, huh? Yeah. 692 00:58:30,805 --> 00:58:33,672 Confidential files, huh? 693 00:58:33,741 --> 00:58:37,768 Look, Carl. This is a highly sensitive area, and I tell you something. 694 00:58:37,845 --> 00:58:40,006 Certain people would be very, very embarrassed. 695 00:58:40,081 --> 00:58:43,244 I would really appreciate it if-if this would be something... 696 00:58:43,317 --> 00:58:46,286 that you and I could... could keep between us. 697 00:58:47,688 --> 00:58:50,316 What are you gonna do for me, man? What would you like? 698 00:58:50,391 --> 00:58:53,019 Got 50 bucks? What? 699 00:58:53,094 --> 00:58:55,119 Fifty bucks. 700 00:58:55,196 --> 00:58:57,130 [Both Laughing] 701 00:58:57,198 --> 00:59:00,599 No, no, no, man. No, you got a middle name? 702 00:59:00,668 --> 00:59:02,659 [Coughs] Yeah, I guess. 703 00:59:02,737 --> 00:59:07,436 Your middle name is Ralph, as in puke. 704 00:59:09,076 --> 00:59:13,035 Your birthday, it's March 12. You're 5'91/2'. 705 00:59:13,114 --> 00:59:15,412 You weigh 130 pounds. 706 00:59:15,483 --> 00:59:17,951 And your social security number is... 707 00:59:18,019 --> 00:59:23,218 049-38-0913. 708 00:59:23,291 --> 00:59:25,225 [Snickers] 709 00:59:25,293 --> 00:59:27,488 Wow. Are you a psychic? 710 00:59:27,562 --> 00:59:29,496 No. 711 00:59:30,898 --> 00:59:33,765 Would you mind telling me how you know all this about me? 712 00:59:37,939 --> 00:59:40,066 I stole your wallet. Give it to me. 713 00:59:40,141 --> 00:59:42,632 No. Give it.! 714 00:59:42,710 --> 00:59:45,110 [Scoffs] This is great. You're a thief too, huh? 715 00:59:45,179 --> 00:59:47,773 I'm not a thief. Multitalented. 716 00:59:47,848 --> 00:59:51,841 What's there to steal? Two bucks and a beaver shot. A what? 717 00:59:51,919 --> 00:59:54,547 He's got a nudie picture in there. I saw it. It's perverted. 718 00:59:54,622 --> 00:59:57,591 All right. Let's see it. 719 01:00:04,265 --> 01:00:07,701 - Are all these your girlfriends? - Some of'em. 720 01:00:07,768 --> 01:00:09,702 What about the others? 721 01:00:09,770 --> 01:00:14,173 Well, some I consider my girlfriends, and some I just consider. 722 01:00:14,241 --> 01:00:16,175 Consider what? 723 01:00:16,243 --> 01:00:18,336 Whether or not I wanna hang out with them. 724 01:00:18,412 --> 01:00:20,880 You don't believe in just one guy, one girl? 725 01:00:22,249 --> 01:00:25,013 - Do you? - Yeah. 726 01:00:25,086 --> 01:00:28,021 - It's the way it should be. - Well, not for me. 727 01:00:28,089 --> 01:00:30,455 Why not? 728 01:00:30,524 --> 01:00:32,515 How come you got so much shit in your purse? 729 01:00:32,593 --> 01:00:35,687 - How come you have so many girlfriends? - I asked you first. 730 01:00:37,164 --> 01:00:39,257 I don't know. I guess I never threw anything away. 731 01:00:39,333 --> 01:00:44,737 - Neither do I. - Oh. 732 01:00:44,805 --> 01:00:48,969 This is the worst fake I.D. I've ever seen. [Chuckles] 733 01:00:49,043 --> 01:00:50,977 Do you realize you made yourself 68? 734 01:00:51,045 --> 01:00:53,673 [Brian] I know. I know. I goofed it. 735 01:00:53,748 --> 01:00:55,978 What do you need a fake I.D. For? 736 01:00:56,050 --> 01:00:58,746 So I can vote. 737 01:00:58,819 --> 01:01:00,753 You wanna see what's in my bag? 738 01:01:00,821 --> 01:01:02,755 [Both] No. 739 01:01:18,172 --> 01:01:20,106 Holy shit! 740 01:01:20,174 --> 01:01:22,734 What is all that stuff? 741 01:01:22,810 --> 01:01:25,677 Do you always carry this much shit in your bag? 742 01:01:25,746 --> 01:01:27,680 Yeah. 743 01:01:27,748 --> 01:01:31,343 I always carry this much shit in my bag. 744 01:01:32,486 --> 01:01:35,284 You never know when you may have to jam. 745 01:01:35,356 --> 01:01:39,520 Are you gonna be, like, a shopping bag lady? 746 01:01:39,593 --> 01:01:42,426 You know, like, sit in alley ways... 747 01:01:42,496 --> 01:01:45,329 and talk to buildings and wear men's shoes and that kind of thing? 748 01:01:45,399 --> 01:01:47,959 I'll do what I have to do. 749 01:01:48,035 --> 01:01:51,334 Why do you have to do anything? 750 01:01:51,405 --> 01:01:56,433 My home life... is unsatisfying. 751 01:01:58,012 --> 01:02:00,242 So you're saying you'd subject yourself to the violent dangers... 752 01:02:00,314 --> 01:02:03,806 of these Chicago streets because your home life is unsatisfying? 753 01:02:03,884 --> 01:02:05,818 I don't have to run away and live in the street. 754 01:02:05,886 --> 01:02:07,820 I can run away and go to the ocean. 755 01:02:07,888 --> 01:02:09,822 I can go to the country, to the mountains. 756 01:02:09,890 --> 01:02:13,485 I could go to Israel, Africa... Afghanistan. 757 01:02:22,636 --> 01:02:24,797 Andy, wanna get in on this? 758 01:02:24,872 --> 01:02:28,035 Allison here says she wants to run away... 759 01:02:28,109 --> 01:02:31,977 because her home life is unsatisfying. 760 01:02:33,514 --> 01:02:35,709 Well, everyone's home life is unsatisfying. 761 01:02:37,384 --> 01:02:40,478 And if it wasn't, people would live with their parents forever. 762 01:02:40,554 --> 01:02:43,785 Yeah, yeah, I understand, but I think hers goes beyond... 763 01:02:43,858 --> 01:02:48,557 what, you know, guys like you and me consider normal unsatisfying. 764 01:02:48,629 --> 01:02:52,360 Never mind. Forget it. Everything's cool. 765 01:02:52,433 --> 01:02:55,095 - What's the deal? - No. 766 01:02:55,169 --> 01:02:57,535 There's no deal, sporto. 767 01:02:57,605 --> 01:03:00,335 Forget it. Leave me alone. Wait a minute. 768 01:03:00,407 --> 01:03:03,433 You're carrying all that crap around in your purse. 769 01:03:03,511 --> 01:03:07,003 Either you really wanna run away, or you want people to think you wanna run away. 770 01:03:07,081 --> 01:03:09,811 Eat shit! 771 01:03:11,619 --> 01:03:15,783 The girl is an island unto herself, okay? 772 01:03:25,232 --> 01:03:28,065 Hi. 773 01:03:28,135 --> 01:03:30,126 You wanna talk? No. 774 01:03:30,204 --> 01:03:33,970 Why not? Go away. 775 01:03:35,209 --> 01:03:37,939 Where do you want me to go? Go away! 776 01:03:48,489 --> 01:03:51,583 - You have problems. - Oh, I have problems. 777 01:03:51,659 --> 01:03:54,628 You do everything everybody tells you to do. That is a problem. 778 01:03:54,695 --> 01:03:57,391 Okay, fine. But I didn't dump my purse out on the couch... 779 01:03:57,464 --> 01:04:02,993 and invite people into my problems, did I? 780 01:04:07,675 --> 01:04:09,609 So what's wrong? 781 01:04:11,011 --> 01:04:12,945 What is it? 782 01:04:15,115 --> 01:04:18,278 [Sighs] Is it bad? 783 01:04:19,720 --> 01:04:21,847 Real bad? 784 01:04:21,922 --> 01:04:23,856 Parents? 785 01:04:39,139 --> 01:04:41,198 Yeah. 786 01:04:50,718 --> 01:04:52,811 What did they do to you? 787 01:04:55,089 --> 01:04:57,819 They ignore me. 788 01:04:59,159 --> 01:05:01,127 Yeah. 789 01:05:03,864 --> 01:05:05,855 Yeah. 790 01:05:08,702 --> 01:05:11,193 What did you wanna be when you were young? 791 01:05:12,907 --> 01:05:16,035 When I was a kid, I wanted to be John Lennon. 792 01:05:17,211 --> 01:05:19,509 Carl, don't be a goof. 793 01:05:19,580 --> 01:05:22,208 I'm trying to make a serious point here. 794 01:05:22,283 --> 01:05:25,150 Carl, I've been teaching for 22 years. 795 01:05:26,954 --> 01:05:30,515 And each year, these kids get more and more arrogant. 796 01:05:30,591 --> 01:05:33,355 Oh, bullshit, man. Come on, Vern. 797 01:05:33,427 --> 01:05:37,090 - The kids haven't changed, you have. - [Sighs] 798 01:05:37,164 --> 01:05:41,362 You took a teaching position 'cause you thought it'd be fun, right? 799 01:05:41,435 --> 01:05:44,598 Thought you could have summer vacations off. 800 01:05:44,672 --> 01:05:48,506 And then you found out it was actually work. That really bummed you out. 801 01:05:51,211 --> 01:05:53,236 These kids turned on me. 802 01:05:56,083 --> 01:05:59,416 They think I'm a big fucking joke. Come on. 803 01:05:59,486 --> 01:06:04,253 Listen, Vern. If you were 16, what would you think of you? 804 01:06:04,325 --> 01:06:09,058 Hey, Carl, you think I give one rat's ass what these kids think of me? 805 01:06:09,129 --> 01:06:11,529 Yes, I do. 806 01:06:11,598 --> 01:06:16,001 You think about this. When you get old, these kids... 807 01:06:16,070 --> 01:06:19,062 when I get old... they're gonna be running the country. 808 01:06:19,139 --> 01:06:21,300 [Chuckles] Yeah. 809 01:06:21,375 --> 01:06:24,776 Now this is the thought that wakes me up in the middle of the night. 810 01:06:26,180 --> 01:06:29,741 When I get older, these kids are gonna take care of me. 811 01:06:31,085 --> 01:06:33,451 I wouldn't count on it. 812 01:06:36,857 --> 01:06:40,258 What would I do for a million bucks? 813 01:06:40,327 --> 01:06:43,194 I guess I'd do as little as I had to. 814 01:06:43,263 --> 01:06:45,731 That's boring. Well, how am I supposed to answer? 815 01:06:45,799 --> 01:06:50,099 The idea is to, like, search your mind for the absolute limit. 816 01:06:50,170 --> 01:06:54,470 Like, um... would you drive to school naked? 817 01:06:54,541 --> 01:06:57,009 [Chuckles] 818 01:06:57,077 --> 01:07:00,604 Um... would I have to get out of the car? 819 01:07:00,681 --> 01:07:04,617 - Of course. - In the spring or winter? 820 01:07:04,685 --> 01:07:06,619 [Claire] Doesn't matter. Spring. 821 01:07:06,687 --> 01:07:09,178 [Andy] In front of the school or in back of the school? 822 01:07:09,256 --> 01:07:12,157 - Either one. - Yes. 823 01:07:12,226 --> 01:07:14,592 I'd do that. 824 01:07:14,661 --> 01:07:18,028 I'll do anything sexual. I don't need a million dollars to do it either. 825 01:07:19,566 --> 01:07:22,501 - You're lying. - I already have. 826 01:07:22,569 --> 01:07:25,970 I've done just about everything there is, except a few things that are illegal. 827 01:07:27,374 --> 01:07:31,834 - I'm a nymphomaniac. - Lie. 828 01:07:31,912 --> 01:07:33,971 Are your parents aware of this? 829 01:07:34,048 --> 01:07:36,881 The only person I told was my shrink. 830 01:07:36,950 --> 01:07:39,111 What did he do when you told him? 831 01:07:39,186 --> 01:07:41,211 He nailed me. 832 01:07:45,192 --> 01:07:47,126 Very nice. 833 01:07:47,194 --> 01:07:49,287 I don't think that from a legal standpoint... 834 01:07:49,363 --> 01:07:52,355 what he did can be construed as rape since I paid him. 835 01:07:52,433 --> 01:07:56,529 - He's an adult. - Yeah. He's married too. 836 01:07:56,603 --> 01:08:00,801 Oh! Do you have any idea how completely gross that is? 837 01:08:00,874 --> 01:08:04,139 Well, the first few times... The first few times? 838 01:08:04,211 --> 01:08:06,543 You mean, he did it more than once? Sure. 839 01:08:06,613 --> 01:08:10,071 Are you crazy? Obviously she's crazy if she's screwing her shrink. 840 01:08:12,553 --> 01:08:14,544 Have you ever done it? 841 01:08:16,757 --> 01:08:18,850 [Scoffs] I don't even have a psychiatrist. 842 01:08:18,926 --> 01:08:21,326 Have you ever done it with a normal person? 843 01:08:21,395 --> 01:08:25,525 - Didn't we already cover this? - You never answered the question. 844 01:08:25,599 --> 01:08:29,797 Look. I'm not going to discuss my private life with total strangers. 845 01:08:29,870 --> 01:08:31,929 It's kind of a double-edged sword, isn't it? 846 01:08:32,005 --> 01:08:36,339 A what? If you say you haven't, you're a prude. 847 01:08:36,410 --> 01:08:40,471 If you say you have, you're a slut. It's a trap. 848 01:08:40,547 --> 01:08:42,481 You want to, but you can't. 849 01:08:42,549 --> 01:08:46,383 And when you do, you wish you didn't, right? Wrong. 850 01:08:46,453 --> 01:08:48,944 Or are you a tease? 851 01:08:50,290 --> 01:08:53,316 She's a tease. I'm sure. Why don't you forget it? 852 01:08:53,393 --> 01:08:56,556 You're a tease and you know it. All girls are teases. 853 01:08:56,630 --> 01:08:59,622 - She's only a tease if what she does gets you hot. - I don't do anything! 854 01:08:59,700 --> 01:09:04,364 - That's why you're a tease. - Okay, let me ask you a few questions. 855 01:09:04,438 --> 01:09:06,633 I already told you everything. No. 856 01:09:06,707 --> 01:09:09,972 Doesn't it bother you to sleep around without being in love? Don't you want respect? 857 01:09:10,043 --> 01:09:12,739 I don't screw to get respect. 858 01:09:12,813 --> 01:09:14,747 That's the difference between you and me. 859 01:09:14,815 --> 01:09:16,908 [Scoffs] It's not the only difference I hope. 860 01:09:16,984 --> 01:09:19,578 [Bender] Face it, you're a tease. I'm not a tease. 861 01:09:19,653 --> 01:09:21,848 Sure you are. Sex is your weapon. 862 01:09:21,922 --> 01:09:24,823 You said it yourself. You use it to get respect. 863 01:09:24,892 --> 01:09:28,658 No, I never said that. She twisted my words around. 864 01:09:28,729 --> 01:09:31,823 - What do you use it for then? - I don't use it, period! 865 01:09:31,899 --> 01:09:35,426 Are you medically frigid or is it psychological? 866 01:09:35,502 --> 01:09:38,903 I didn't mean it that way. You guys are putting words into my mouth. 867 01:09:38,972 --> 01:09:41,770 - Just answer the question. - [Brian] Why don't you just answer the question? 868 01:09:41,842 --> 01:09:44,709 Be honest. No big deal. Yeah, answer it. 869 01:09:44,778 --> 01:09:47,576 - Just answer the question. - Talk to us. - Answer the question.! 870 01:09:47,648 --> 01:09:50,276 Don't be a jerk.! It's easy. It's only one question. 871 01:09:50,350 --> 01:09:52,750 No, I never did it! 872 01:09:57,324 --> 01:10:00,623 I never did it either. 873 01:10:02,129 --> 01:10:05,895 I'm not a nymphomaniac. I'm a compulsive liar. 874 01:10:07,000 --> 01:10:09,525 You are such a bitch! 875 01:10:09,603 --> 01:10:12,868 You did that on purpose just to fuck me over.! 876 01:10:12,940 --> 01:10:16,569 I would do it though. If you love someone, it's okay. 877 01:10:18,278 --> 01:10:20,041 [Claire] I can't believe you. You're so weird. 878 01:10:20,113 --> 01:10:23,082 You don't say anything all day, and then when you open your mouth... 879 01:10:23,150 --> 01:10:25,983 you unload all these tremendous lies all over me. 880 01:10:26,053 --> 01:10:29,580 You're just pissed off because she got you to admit something you didn't want to admit to. 881 01:10:29,656 --> 01:10:32,022 Okay, fine. But that doesn't make it any less bizarre. 882 01:10:32,092 --> 01:10:36,188 What's bizarre? I mean, we're all pretty bizarre. 883 01:10:36,263 --> 01:10:38,561 Some of us are just better at hiding it, that's all. 884 01:10:38,632 --> 01:10:40,657 How are you bizarre? 885 01:10:43,036 --> 01:10:44,970 He can't think for himself. 886 01:10:47,007 --> 01:10:49,601 She's right. 887 01:10:49,676 --> 01:10:53,737 Do you guys know what, uh, what I did to get in here? 888 01:10:55,148 --> 01:10:57,514 I taped Larry Lester's buns together. 889 01:10:57,584 --> 01:10:59,575 - [Laughs] - That was you? 890 01:10:59,653 --> 01:11:03,612 - Yeah. You know him? - Yeah, I know him. 891 01:11:03,690 --> 01:11:06,352 Then you know how hairy he is, right? 892 01:11:08,061 --> 01:11:10,723 When they pulled the tape off... 893 01:11:10,797 --> 01:11:14,289 most of his hair came off and some skin too. 894 01:11:14,368 --> 01:11:16,700 Oh, my God. 895 01:11:16,770 --> 01:11:19,534 The bizarre thing is... 896 01:11:19,606 --> 01:11:21,699 is that I did it for my old man. 897 01:11:23,577 --> 01:11:26,273 I tortured this poor kid... 898 01:11:26,346 --> 01:11:29,144 because I wanted him to think that I was cool. 899 01:11:31,718 --> 01:11:36,178 He's always going off about, you know, when he was in school. 900 01:11:36,256 --> 01:11:39,714 All the wild things he used to do. 901 01:11:39,793 --> 01:11:45,629 And I got the feeling that he was disappointed that I never cut loose on anyone, right? 902 01:11:48,035 --> 01:11:52,028 So, I'm sittin' in the locker room... 903 01:11:52,105 --> 01:11:54,596 and I'm taping up my knee. 904 01:11:56,343 --> 01:12:01,144 And Larry's undressing a couple lockers down from me. 905 01:12:02,916 --> 01:12:05,851 And... he's kind of... 906 01:12:05,919 --> 01:12:07,853 he's kind of skinny. 907 01:12:07,921 --> 01:12:10,583 He's weak. 908 01:12:10,657 --> 01:12:14,525 And I started thinking about my father... 909 01:12:14,594 --> 01:12:18,963 and his attitude about... about weakness. 910 01:12:19,032 --> 01:12:22,934 And the next thing I knew... 911 01:12:23,003 --> 01:12:27,201 I jumped on top of him and started wailing on him. 912 01:12:29,109 --> 01:12:32,670 And my friends, they just laughed and cheered me on. 913 01:12:35,615 --> 01:12:39,210 And afterwards... 914 01:12:39,286 --> 01:12:42,346 when I was sitting in Vernon's office... 915 01:12:44,958 --> 01:12:48,121 all I could think about... 916 01:12:48,195 --> 01:12:51,722 was Larry's father... 917 01:12:51,798 --> 01:12:55,791 and Larry having to go home... 918 01:12:55,869 --> 01:13:00,272 and... and explain what happened to him. 919 01:13:03,477 --> 01:13:07,937 And... the humiliation... 920 01:13:08,014 --> 01:13:11,142 fucking humiliation he must have felt. 921 01:13:14,488 --> 01:13:16,581 It must have been unreal. 922 01:13:19,192 --> 01:13:23,094 I mean, how do you apologize for something like that? 923 01:13:26,900 --> 01:13:28,834 There's no way. 924 01:13:33,006 --> 01:13:35,668 It's all because of me and my old man. 925 01:13:39,880 --> 01:13:41,814 God, I fucking hate him. 926 01:13:44,418 --> 01:13:49,412 He's like this... He's like this mindless machine that I can't relate to anymore. 927 01:13:50,924 --> 01:13:56,157 Andrew.! You've got to be number one.! 928 01:13:56,229 --> 01:13:58,754 I won't tolerate any losers in this family. 929 01:13:58,832 --> 01:14:03,633 Your intensity is for shit! Win! Win! Win! 930 01:14:05,038 --> 01:14:07,836 You son of a bitch. 931 01:14:10,744 --> 01:14:15,204 You know sometimes I wish my knee would give... 932 01:14:15,282 --> 01:14:18,308 then I wouldn't be able to wrestle anymore. 933 01:14:18,385 --> 01:14:22,515 Then he could forget all about me. 934 01:14:22,589 --> 01:14:25,820 I think your old man and my old man should get together and go bowling. 935 01:14:25,892 --> 01:14:27,860 [Chuckles] 936 01:14:32,098 --> 01:14:34,032 It's like me, you know, with my grades. 937 01:14:34,100 --> 01:14:38,503 Like when l... when l... when I step outside myself... 938 01:14:38,572 --> 01:14:41,837 and like when I look in at myself, you know. 939 01:14:44,578 --> 01:14:46,739 And l... And I see me. 940 01:14:50,050 --> 01:14:51,984 I don't like what I see. 941 01:14:53,286 --> 01:14:55,550 I really don't. 942 01:14:55,622 --> 01:15:00,685 What's wrong with you? Why don't you like yourself? 943 01:15:00,760 --> 01:15:02,751 Sounds stupid, but... 944 01:15:06,633 --> 01:15:08,567 because I'm failing shop. 945 01:15:10,403 --> 01:15:15,067 We had this assignment, you know, to make this, like, ceramic elephant... 946 01:15:15,141 --> 01:15:17,439 and we had eight weeks to do it. 947 01:15:17,511 --> 01:15:21,072 And then, you know, we're supposed to... It was like a lamp. 948 01:15:21,147 --> 01:15:25,083 And when, you know, when you pull it, the trunk, the light was supposed to go on. 949 01:15:27,487 --> 01:15:30,183 But my light didn't go on. 950 01:15:30,257 --> 01:15:32,384 I got an "F" on it. 951 01:15:33,627 --> 01:15:35,561 I've never got an "F" in my life. 952 01:15:36,963 --> 01:15:39,557 When I signed up, you know, for the course, I mean... 953 01:15:39,633 --> 01:15:41,658 I thought I was playing it real smart, you know... 954 01:15:41,735 --> 01:15:43,760 'cause I thought, you know, I'll take shop. 955 01:15:43,837 --> 01:15:46,271 It'll be such an easy way to maintain my grade point average. 956 01:15:46,339 --> 01:15:48,273 Why'd you think it'd be easy? 957 01:15:50,744 --> 01:15:52,871 Have you seen some of the dopes that take shop? 958 01:15:52,946 --> 01:15:56,882 I take shop. You must be a fuckin'idiot. 959 01:15:56,950 --> 01:15:58,747 I'm a fuckin' idiot 'cause I can't make a lamp? 960 01:15:58,818 --> 01:16:01,378 No, you're a genius 'cause you can't make a lamp. 961 01:16:01,454 --> 01:16:04,150 What do you know about trigonometry? 962 01:16:04,224 --> 01:16:05,987 I could care less about trigonometry. 963 01:16:06,059 --> 01:16:08,960 Bender, did you know without trigonometry, there'd be no engineering? 964 01:16:09,029 --> 01:16:10,894 Without lamps, there'd be no light. 965 01:16:10,964 --> 01:16:14,730 Okay, so neither one of you is any better than the other one. 966 01:16:14,801 --> 01:16:17,133 I can write with my toes. 967 01:16:17,203 --> 01:16:20,604 I can also eat, brush my teeth... 968 01:16:20,674 --> 01:16:22,835 With your feet? 969 01:16:22,909 --> 01:16:26,003 - Play "Heart And Soul" on the piano. - I can make spaghetti. 970 01:16:27,147 --> 01:16:29,980 What can you do? 971 01:16:30,050 --> 01:16:33,315 I can, uh, tape all of your buns together. 972 01:16:33,386 --> 01:16:36,287 I wanna see what Claire can do. 973 01:16:36,356 --> 01:16:39,086 - I can't do anything. - Everybody can do something. 974 01:16:41,061 --> 01:16:43,825 There's one thing I can do. 975 01:16:43,897 --> 01:16:47,196 - No, forget it. It's way too embarrassing. - You ever seen Wild Kingdom? 976 01:16:47,267 --> 01:16:49,201 That guy's been doing that show for 30 years. 977 01:16:50,503 --> 01:16:55,202 Okay. But you have to swear to God you won't laugh. 978 01:16:55,275 --> 01:16:57,368 [Scoffs] 979 01:16:58,378 --> 01:17:00,312 Okay. 980 01:17:02,215 --> 01:17:06,117 I can't believe I'm actually doing this. 981 01:17:16,796 --> 01:17:20,027 [Applause] Yea.! 982 01:17:20,100 --> 01:17:24,628 All right. That's great! Where'd you learn to do that? 983 01:17:24,704 --> 01:17:26,638 Camp. Seventh grade. 984 01:17:26,706 --> 01:17:29,732 [Slow Clapping] 985 01:17:32,278 --> 01:17:34,212 That was great, Claire. 986 01:17:35,515 --> 01:17:37,813 My image of you is totally blown. 987 01:17:37,884 --> 01:17:42,014 You're a shit. Don't do that to her. You swore to God you wouldn't laugh. 988 01:17:42,088 --> 01:17:44,886 - Am I laughing? - You fuckin' prick! 989 01:17:47,727 --> 01:17:50,696 What do you care what I think anyway? 990 01:17:51,931 --> 01:17:55,423 I don't even count, right? 991 01:17:55,502 --> 01:17:58,232 I could disappear forever and it wouldn't make any difference. 992 01:18:00,173 --> 01:18:04,667 I may as well not even exist at this school, remember? 993 01:18:07,947 --> 01:18:10,780 And you... don't like me anyway. 994 01:18:10,850 --> 01:18:13,819 You know, I have just as many feelings as you do... 995 01:18:13,887 --> 01:18:16,412 and it hurts just as much when somebody steps all over them. 996 01:18:16,489 --> 01:18:18,457 [Bender] God, you're so pathetic. 997 01:18:18,525 --> 01:18:23,622 Don't you ever, ever compare yourself to me, okay? 998 01:18:23,697 --> 01:18:25,688 You got everything, and I got shit. 999 01:18:25,765 --> 01:18:28,825 Fuckin'Rapunzel, right? 1000 01:18:28,902 --> 01:18:32,133 School would probably shut down if you didn't show up. 1001 01:18:32,205 --> 01:18:34,833 Queenie isn't here. 1002 01:18:34,908 --> 01:18:38,469 I like those earrings, Claire. Shut up. 1003 01:18:38,545 --> 01:18:40,979 Are those real diamonds, Claire? Shut up! 1004 01:18:41,047 --> 01:18:44,983 I bet they are. Did you work for the money... 1005 01:18:45,051 --> 01:18:47,747 Shut your mouth! For those earrings? 1006 01:18:47,821 --> 01:18:50,551 Or did your daddy buy those for you? Shut up! 1007 01:18:50,623 --> 01:18:52,853 I bet he bought those for you. 1008 01:18:52,926 --> 01:18:56,862 I bet those were a Christmas gift, right? 1009 01:18:56,930 --> 01:18:58,898 You know what I got for Christmas this year? 1010 01:18:58,965 --> 01:19:03,800 It was a banner fucking year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. 1011 01:19:03,870 --> 01:19:07,362 The old man grabbed me and said, "Hey, smoke up, Johnny." 1012 01:19:07,440 --> 01:19:10,170 Okay, so go home and cry to your daddy. Don't cry here, okay? 1013 01:19:16,149 --> 01:19:18,242 [Claire Sniffling] 1014 01:19:23,356 --> 01:19:25,847 My God, are we gonna be like our parents? 1015 01:19:25,925 --> 01:19:27,984 Not me. 1016 01:19:30,764 --> 01:19:32,698 Ever. 1017 01:19:34,901 --> 01:19:37,768 It's unavoidable. 1018 01:19:37,837 --> 01:19:40,965 It just happens. 1019 01:19:41,040 --> 01:19:43,008 [Claire] What happens? 1020 01:19:44,444 --> 01:19:48,380 When you grow up, your heart dies. 1021 01:19:48,448 --> 01:19:52,885 - Who cares? - I care. 1022 01:19:54,220 --> 01:19:57,519 [Brian] Um, I was just thinking, I mean... 1023 01:19:57,590 --> 01:20:02,459 I know it's kind of a weird time, but I was just wondering, um... 1024 01:20:05,131 --> 01:20:07,065 what is going to happen to us on Monday... 1025 01:20:07,133 --> 01:20:09,363 when we're all together again? 1026 01:20:10,937 --> 01:20:13,497 I mean, I consider you guys my friends. 1027 01:20:14,941 --> 01:20:19,139 - I'm not wrong, am I? - No. 1028 01:20:19,212 --> 01:20:22,739 So... So on Monday, what happens? 1029 01:20:22,816 --> 01:20:25,614 Are we still friends, you mean? 1030 01:20:25,685 --> 01:20:28,347 - If we're friends now, that is. - Yeah. 1031 01:20:29,856 --> 01:20:33,314 - Do you want the truth? - Yeah, I want the truth. 1032 01:20:33,393 --> 01:20:35,884 [Sighs] I don't think so. 1033 01:20:38,331 --> 01:20:43,200 - With all of us or just John? - With all of you. 1034 01:20:43,269 --> 01:20:47,171 That's a real nice attitude, Claire. Oh, be honest, Andy. 1035 01:20:47,240 --> 01:20:51,370 If Brian came walking up to you in the hall on Monday, what would you do? 1036 01:20:51,444 --> 01:20:54,538 I mean, picture this. You're there with all the sports. 1037 01:20:54,614 --> 01:20:57,777 You know exactly what you'd do. You'd say hi to him, and when he left... 1038 01:20:57,851 --> 01:21:01,184 you'd cut him all up so your friends wouldn't think you really liked him. 1039 01:21:01,254 --> 01:21:04,417 - No way. - [Allison] Okay. 1040 01:21:04,490 --> 01:21:08,358 - What if I came up to you? - Same exact thing. 1041 01:21:08,428 --> 01:21:11,295 You are a bitch! 1042 01:21:11,364 --> 01:21:14,697 Why, 'cause I'm telling the truth? That makes me a bitch? 1043 01:21:14,767 --> 01:21:16,792 No, you know how shitty that is to do to someone. 1044 01:21:16,870 --> 01:21:19,270 And you don't got the balls to stand up to your friends... 1045 01:21:19,339 --> 01:21:21,466 and tell them you're gonna like who you wanna like. 1046 01:21:21,541 --> 01:21:23,941 Okay, what about you, you hypocrite? 1047 01:21:24,010 --> 01:21:26,945 Why don't you take Allison to one of your heavy metal vomit parties? 1048 01:21:27,013 --> 01:21:29,573 Or take Brian out to the parking lot at lunch to get high? 1049 01:21:29,649 --> 01:21:32,117 Or what about Andy for that matter? What about me? 1050 01:21:32,185 --> 01:21:35,211 What would your friends say if we were walking down the hall together? 1051 01:21:35,288 --> 01:21:38,155 They'd laugh their asses off, and you'd tell them you were doing it with me... 1052 01:21:38,224 --> 01:21:40,158 so they'd forgive you for being seen with me. 1053 01:21:40,226 --> 01:21:42,160 Don't you ever talk about my friends! 1054 01:21:42,228 --> 01:21:45,220 You don't know any of my friends you don't look at any of my friends... 1055 01:21:45,298 --> 01:21:47,960 and you certainly wouldn't condescend to speak to any of my friends... 1056 01:21:48,034 --> 01:21:49,968 so you just stick to the things you know... 1057 01:21:50,036 --> 01:21:52,561 shopping, nail polish, your father's BMW... 1058 01:21:52,639 --> 01:21:55,802 and your poor, rich, drunk mother in the Caribbean. Shut up! 1059 01:21:55,875 --> 01:21:59,436 As far as being concerned about what's gonna happen when you and I walk down the hallways... 1060 01:21:59,512 --> 01:22:01,844 you can forget it, 'cause it's never gonna happen. 1061 01:22:01,915 --> 01:22:05,476 Just bury your head in the sand and wait for your fuckin' prom! 1062 01:22:05,551 --> 01:22:08,611 I hate you! Yeah? Good.! 1063 01:22:14,894 --> 01:22:17,863 Okay, then I assume Allison and I are better people than you guys, huh? 1064 01:22:19,365 --> 01:22:21,492 Us weirdos. 1065 01:22:22,568 --> 01:22:25,662 Would you... Would you do that to me? 1066 01:22:25,738 --> 01:22:28,206 I don't have any friends. 1067 01:22:30,243 --> 01:22:33,610 - Well, if you did. - No. 1068 01:22:35,982 --> 01:22:38,780 I don't think the kind of friends I'd have would mind. 1069 01:22:38,851 --> 01:22:42,014 Well, I just wanna tell... 1070 01:22:42,088 --> 01:22:44,955 each of you that I wouldn't do that. 1071 01:22:45,024 --> 01:22:47,891 I wouldn't and I will not. 1072 01:22:49,629 --> 01:22:51,563 'Cause I think that's real shitty. 1073 01:22:54,600 --> 01:22:57,160 Your friends wouldn't mind because they look up to us. 1074 01:23:01,040 --> 01:23:04,032 You're so conceited, Claire. 1075 01:23:04,110 --> 01:23:06,340 You're so conceited. 1076 01:23:06,412 --> 01:23:08,642 You're so, like, full of yourself. Why are you like that? 1077 01:23:08,715 --> 01:23:12,446 I'm not saying that to be conceited. 1078 01:23:12,518 --> 01:23:15,851 I hate it. I hate having to go along with everything my friends say. 1079 01:23:15,922 --> 01:23:18,015 [Brian] Well, then why do you do it? 1080 01:23:19,359 --> 01:23:22,419 I don't know. I don't... 1081 01:23:22,495 --> 01:23:25,623 You don't understand. You don't... 1082 01:23:25,698 --> 01:23:29,759 You're not friends with the same kinds of people Andy and I are friends with. 1083 01:23:29,836 --> 01:23:34,500 You know, you just don't understand the pressure they can put on you. 1084 01:23:34,574 --> 01:23:36,542 I don't understand what? 1085 01:23:36,609 --> 01:23:40,045 You think I don't understand pressure, Claire? 1086 01:23:40,113 --> 01:23:43,014 Well, fuck you! Fuck you! 1087 01:23:51,057 --> 01:23:52,991 You know why I'm here today? 1088 01:23:55,094 --> 01:23:57,028 Do you? 1089 01:23:58,531 --> 01:24:02,262 [Sniffles] I'm here... 1090 01:24:02,335 --> 01:24:07,466 because Mr. Ryan... found a gun in my locker. 1091 01:24:10,543 --> 01:24:13,569 Why'd you have a gun in your locker? 1092 01:24:13,646 --> 01:24:15,614 I tried. 1093 01:24:17,316 --> 01:24:22,219 When you pull the fuckin'... trunk on it, the light's supposed to go on. 1094 01:24:22,288 --> 01:24:24,984 [Sniffles] It didn't go on. 1095 01:24:28,227 --> 01:24:31,128 - [Andy] What's the gun for, Brian? - Just forget it. 1096 01:24:31,197 --> 01:24:33,324 You brought it up, man. 1097 01:24:35,435 --> 01:24:37,369 I can't have an "F." 1098 01:24:40,706 --> 01:24:45,405 I can't have it, and I know my parents can't have it. 1099 01:24:48,915 --> 01:24:53,011 Even if I ace the rest of the semester, I'm still only a "B. ' 1100 01:24:53,086 --> 01:24:55,782 Everything's ruined for me. 1101 01:24:55,855 --> 01:24:58,585 Brian... What? 1102 01:25:03,996 --> 01:25:06,624 Considering my options, you know. 1103 01:25:06,699 --> 01:25:08,667 No, killing yourself is not an option. 1104 01:25:08,734 --> 01:25:11,999 Well, I didn't do it, did I? No, I don't think so. 1105 01:25:12,071 --> 01:25:14,130 It was a handgun? 1106 01:25:14,207 --> 01:25:19,270 [Exhales] No, it was a flare gun. It went off in my locker. 1107 01:25:19,345 --> 01:25:23,509 Really? [Laughs] 1108 01:25:23,583 --> 01:25:28,282 - It's not funny. - [Clears Throat, Chuckles] 1109 01:25:37,563 --> 01:25:42,193 [Chuckles] Yes, it is. 1110 01:25:44,137 --> 01:25:46,662 [Brian] Fuckin'elephant was destroyed. 1111 01:25:47,974 --> 01:25:51,501 You wanna know what I did to get in here? 1112 01:25:53,779 --> 01:25:56,339 Nothing. 1113 01:25:56,415 --> 01:25:58,815 I didn't have anything better to do. 1114 01:25:58,885 --> 01:26:01,683 [All Chuckling] 1115 01:26:04,657 --> 01:26:06,818 You're laughing at me. 1116 01:26:06,893 --> 01:26:09,828 No! Yeah, you are. 1117 01:26:12,465 --> 01:26:13,727 (music)[Rock] 1118 01:26:14,800 --> 01:26:17,564 [Music][music] [Record Scratches, Rock Continues] 1119 01:26:19,038 --> 01:26:21,336 [Volume Increases] 1120 01:26:34,187 --> 01:26:36,917 [Music] It seems so clear in black and white [music] 1121 01:26:36,989 --> 01:26:40,447 (music) The living color tends to dull our sight (music) 1122 01:26:40,526 --> 01:26:43,859 (music)Like dynamite (music) 1123 01:26:43,930 --> 01:26:48,560 (music)Just imagine my surprise when I looked into your eyes (music) 1124 01:26:48,634 --> 01:26:53,833 (music)And saw through your disguise (music) 1125 01:26:53,906 --> 01:26:58,138 (music)lf we dare expose our hearts and just reveal the purest thoughts (music) 1126 01:26:58,211 --> 01:27:03,148 (music) That's when strange sensations start to grow (music) 1127 01:27:03,216 --> 01:27:06,310 (music) Oh, we are not alone (music) 1128 01:27:06,385 --> 01:27:08,580 (music) You find out where you're coming from (music) 1129 01:27:08,654 --> 01:27:14,251 (music) There'll be somebody there to break your fall (music) 1130 01:27:14,327 --> 01:27:16,295 (music) We are not alone (music) 1131 01:27:16,362 --> 01:27:19,058 (music) 'Cause when you come down through the fold (music) 1132 01:27:19,131 --> 01:27:23,431 (music) We're really not so different after all (music) 1133 01:27:41,854 --> 01:27:44,220 (music)[New Song] 1134 01:27:55,501 --> 01:27:58,527 Brian? Hmm. 1135 01:27:58,604 --> 01:28:01,971 Are you gonna write your paper? Yeah. Why? 1136 01:28:04,110 --> 01:28:08,012 Well, it's kind of a waste for all of us to write our paper, don't you think? 1137 01:28:08,080 --> 01:28:10,014 Well, that's what Vernon wants us to do. 1138 01:28:10,082 --> 01:28:14,348 [Claire] True. But I think we'd all kind of say the same thing. 1139 01:28:15,755 --> 01:28:18,849 You just don't wanna write your paper, right? 1140 01:28:18,924 --> 01:28:22,883 True, but you're the smartest, right? 1141 01:28:22,962 --> 01:28:26,921 Well. Um... We trust you. 1142 01:28:30,102 --> 01:28:32,161 Yeah. 1143 01:28:34,240 --> 01:28:38,176 All right. I'll do it. 1144 01:28:39,278 --> 01:28:41,212 Great. 1145 01:28:53,526 --> 01:28:55,551 Come on. 1146 01:28:55,628 --> 01:28:58,597 Where we going? Come on. 1147 01:29:00,599 --> 01:29:04,433 [Claire] Don't be afraid. 1148 01:29:04,503 --> 01:29:06,596 Don't stick that in my eye. I'm not sticking... 1149 01:29:06,672 --> 01:29:09,402 Just close it. Wait a minute. Just go like... go like that. 1150 01:29:11,444 --> 01:29:16,006 Good. [Whimpers] 1151 01:29:16,082 --> 01:29:19,108 You know, you really do look better without all that black shit on your eyes. 1152 01:29:19,185 --> 01:29:21,881 Hey, I like that black shit. 1153 01:29:23,222 --> 01:29:25,417 [Claire] This looks a lot better. 1154 01:29:25,491 --> 01:29:27,425 Look up. 1155 01:29:33,032 --> 01:29:35,762 [Sighs] 1156 01:29:35,835 --> 01:29:39,703 Please. Why are you being so nice to me? 1157 01:29:39,772 --> 01:29:41,706 'Cause you're letting me. 1158 01:29:49,715 --> 01:29:51,979 [Door Opens] 1159 01:29:59,492 --> 01:30:01,722 You lost? 1160 01:30:52,545 --> 01:30:55,207 Thank you. 1161 01:31:02,755 --> 01:31:05,155 Why'd you do that? 1162 01:31:05,224 --> 01:31:08,387 'Cause I knew you wouldn't. 1163 01:31:08,461 --> 01:31:12,727 You know how you said before how your parents use you to get back at each other? 1164 01:31:12,798 --> 01:31:15,323 Wouldn't I be outstanding in that capacity? 1165 01:31:18,170 --> 01:31:20,900 Were you really disgusted about what I did with my lipstick? 1166 01:31:22,007 --> 01:31:25,670 Truth? Truth. 1167 01:31:25,744 --> 01:31:27,678 No. 1168 01:31:37,723 --> 01:31:40,556 What happened to you? 1169 01:31:40,626 --> 01:31:44,392 Why? Claire did it. 1170 01:31:48,067 --> 01:31:50,558 - What's wrong? - Nothing's wrong. 1171 01:31:50,636 --> 01:31:56,199 It's just... you're just so different, you know. 1172 01:31:56,275 --> 01:31:59,369 I can see your face. 1173 01:31:59,445 --> 01:32:01,379 Is that good or bad? 1174 01:32:02,815 --> 01:32:05,010 That's good. 1175 01:32:19,832 --> 01:32:21,959 See ya, Brian. Hey, Carl. 1176 01:32:23,269 --> 01:32:25,829 See ya next Saturday. You bet. 1177 01:32:35,147 --> 01:32:39,015 (music) Won't you come see about me (music) 1178 01:32:39,084 --> 01:32:43,817 (music)I'll be alone, dancing you know it, baby 1179 01:32:43,889 --> 01:32:47,757 (music) Tell me your troubles and doubts (music) 1180 01:32:47,826 --> 01:32:52,820 (music) Giving me everything inside and out and (music) 1181 01:32:52,898 --> 01:32:56,629 (music)Love's strange so real in the dark (music) 1182 01:32:56,702 --> 01:33:01,537 (music) Think of the tender things that we were working on (music) 1183 01:33:01,607 --> 01:33:05,566 (music)Slow change may pull us apart (music) 1184 01:33:05,644 --> 01:33:10,274 (music) When the light gets into your heart, baby (music) 1185 01:33:10,349 --> 01:33:12,817 (music)Don't you (music) 1186 01:33:12,885 --> 01:33:16,753 (music)Forget about me (music) 1187 01:33:16,822 --> 01:33:19,382 (music)Don't, don't, don't, don't (music) 1188 01:33:19,458 --> 01:33:21,756 (music)Don't you (music) 1189 01:33:21,827 --> 01:33:23,920 (music)Forget about me (music) 1190 01:33:27,099 --> 01:33:31,866 (music) Will you stand above me (music) 1191 01:33:31,937 --> 01:33:36,374 (music)Look my way but never love me (music) 1192 01:33:36,442 --> 01:33:41,243 (music)Rain keeps falling Rain keeps falling (music) 1193 01:33:41,313 --> 01:33:45,374 (music)Down, down, down (music) 1194 01:33:45,451 --> 01:33:49,581 (music) Will you recognize me (music) 1195 01:33:49,655 --> 01:33:53,318 (music) Call my name or walk on by (music) 1196 01:33:53,392 --> 01:33:58,853 (music)As the rain keeps falling Rain keeps falling (music) 1197 01:33:58,931 --> 01:34:01,798 (music)Down, down, down (music) 1198 01:34:05,037 --> 01:34:08,632 (music)Hey, hey, hey, hey (music) 1199 01:34:08,707 --> 01:34:11,198 (music) Ooh (music) 1200 01:34:11,276 --> 01:34:14,302 [Brian's Voice] "Dear Mr. Vernon... 1201 01:34:14,380 --> 01:34:17,178 "We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention... 1202 01:34:17,249 --> 01:34:19,683 "for whatever it was we did wrong... 1203 01:34:19,752 --> 01:34:23,779 "but we think you're crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are. 1204 01:34:23,856 --> 01:34:26,222 "You see us as you wanna see us... 1205 01:34:26,291 --> 01:34:29,920 "in the simplest terms with the most convenient definitions. 1206 01:34:29,995 --> 01:34:34,455 "But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain... 1207 01:34:34,533 --> 01:34:36,467 [Andy's Voice] "And an athlete... 1208 01:34:36,535 --> 01:34:38,469 [Allison's Voice] "And a basket case... 1209 01:34:38,537 --> 01:34:41,165 [Claire's Voice] princess... [Bender's Voice] And a criminal. 1210 01:34:41,240 --> 01:34:44,471 [Brian's Voice] "Does that answer your question? 1211 01:34:44,543 --> 01:34:49,344 Sincerely yours, The Breakfast Club. ' 1212 01:34:49,415 --> 01:34:52,077 (music)Don't, don't, don't, don't (music) 1213 01:34:52,151 --> 01:34:54,449 (music)Don't you (music) 1214 01:34:54,520 --> 01:34:57,216 (music)Forget about me (music) 1215 01:34:58,857 --> 01:35:01,553 (music)As you walk on by (music)