1 00:00:03,570 --> 00:00:06,573 ( theme music playing ) 2 00:00:31,097 --> 00:00:33,099 SOME OF YOU MAY BE SURPRISED TO SEE ME 3 00:00:33,099 --> 00:00:36,102 DRESSED AS A FRANCISCAN VICAR, FIDDLING ABOUT WITH A PRAM. 4 00:00:36,102 --> 00:00:39,105 SOME OF YOU MAY BE EVEN MORE SURPRISED TO LEARN 5 00:00:39,105 --> 00:00:41,607 THAT THE BABY IN THE PRAM IS NONE OTHER THAN MY WAITRESS, 6 00:00:41,608 --> 00:00:43,610 MIMI LABONQ. 7 00:00:45,111 --> 00:00:47,113 MAY I SPEAK? 8 00:00:47,113 --> 00:00:48,114 NO. 9 00:00:49,616 --> 00:00:53,119 ALL THIS IS A SIMPLE RUSE TO RECOVER THE GENUINE PAINTINGS 10 00:00:53,119 --> 00:00:55,621 OF THE FALLEN MADONNA WITH THE BIG BOOBIES BY VAN CLOMP, 11 00:00:55,622 --> 00:00:58,124 AND THE CRACKED VASE WITH THE BIG DAISIES BY VAN GOGH, 12 00:00:58,124 --> 00:01:00,626 BOTH OF WHICH PAINTINGS I HAVE NOW CONCEALED 13 00:01:00,627 --> 00:01:02,629 IN THE NAPPY OF MIMI LABONQ. 14 00:01:04,130 --> 00:01:06,132 I WILL HAVE TO BLOW THE TALCUM POWDER OFF 15 00:01:06,132 --> 00:01:08,134 WHEN I GET HOME. 16 00:01:08,134 --> 00:01:09,135 THE FORGERIES, I SHOULD ADD, 17 00:01:09,135 --> 00:01:11,637 ARE CONCEALED BEHIND THAT BEAM UP THERE. 18 00:01:11,638 --> 00:01:15,141 NOW, THE GERMAN COLONEL AND THE ITALIAN CAPTAIN 19 00:01:15,141 --> 00:01:17,143 WERE JUST ABOUT TO CREATE A DIVERSION 20 00:01:17,143 --> 00:01:18,644 SO THAT I COULD ESCAPE, 21 00:01:18,645 --> 00:01:20,647 WHEN, UNFORTUNATELY, THEY WERE AMBUSHED 22 00:01:20,647 --> 00:01:22,649 BY THE COMMUNIST RESISTANCE AND CAPTURED. 23 00:01:22,649 --> 00:01:25,151 AND THEY ARE NOW, EVEN AS I SPEAK, 24 00:01:25,151 --> 00:01:27,153 BEING LED HERE BY THEIR FEARED LEADER, 25 00:01:27,153 --> 00:01:29,155 DENISE LAROQUE, WHO IS, OF COURSE, 26 00:01:29,155 --> 00:01:30,656 MADLY IN LOVE WITH ME. 27 00:01:30,657 --> 00:01:31,658 ( door opening ) 28 00:01:31,658 --> 00:01:34,661 LOOK OUT, LIE BACK, AND BEHAVE LIKE A BABY! 29 00:01:34,661 --> 00:01:35,662 ( belches ) 30 00:01:39,666 --> 00:01:41,167 Captain: HEY. HEY! 31 00:01:41,167 --> 00:01:43,169 MIND WHERE YOU POKE THAT THING. 32 00:01:43,169 --> 00:01:44,170 STAND OVER THERE! 33 00:01:44,170 --> 00:01:47,673 HOW DID YOU GERMAN PIGS FIND OUR SECRET HEADQUARTERS? 34 00:01:47,674 --> 00:01:50,176 WE WERE LED HERE BY THE OLD PIANO PLAYER. 35 00:01:50,176 --> 00:01:53,179 YOU ARE A TRAITOR TO FRANCE, 36 00:01:53,179 --> 00:01:55,181 AND YOU WILL BE SHOT IMMEDIATELY. 37 00:01:55,181 --> 00:01:56,182 NO, NO, NO. 38 00:01:56,182 --> 00:01:58,684 PLEASE, THEY MADE ME DO IT. 39 00:01:58,685 --> 00:02:01,187 I WILL DIE FOR FRANCE. 40 00:02:01,187 --> 00:02:02,688 BUT YOU DID NOT DIE. 41 00:02:02,689 --> 00:02:05,692 I WILL, I WILL... 42 00:02:05,692 --> 00:02:06,693 EVENTUALLY. 43 00:02:08,194 --> 00:02:11,197 MA'AM, MAY I INTERCEDE ON BEHALF OF THIS FRAIL, 44 00:02:11,197 --> 00:02:13,199 OLD, PIANO TUNING, PEASANT? 45 00:02:13,199 --> 00:02:15,201 HE HAS NEVER GROWN UP. 46 00:02:15,201 --> 00:02:18,204 HE HAS THE MIND OF A FIVE-YEAR-OLD. 47 00:02:18,204 --> 00:02:21,207 HE HAS A CONDITION KNOWN IN THE MEDICAL WORLD AS-- 48 00:02:21,207 --> 00:02:22,208 "GAGA." 49 00:02:23,710 --> 00:02:26,212 BE CALM, MY SON, NO HARM WILL BEFALL YOU. 50 00:02:26,212 --> 00:02:28,714 THANK YOU, FATHER. 51 00:02:28,715 --> 00:02:30,216 WHY DO WE WASTE TIME TALKING? 52 00:02:30,216 --> 00:02:32,718 WE SHOULD TAKE THESE ENEMIES OF FRANCE OUTSIDE, 53 00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:34,721 PUT THEM UP AGAINST THE WALL OF THE BARN, 54 00:02:34,721 --> 00:02:36,222 AND BUMP THEM OFF. 55 00:02:36,222 --> 00:02:37,723 YOU A BEAUTIFUL LADY. 56 00:02:37,724 --> 00:02:40,226 WHY YOU SO DAMNED AGGRESSIVE, EH? 57 00:02:42,228 --> 00:02:43,729 YOU SHOULD NOT MAKE THE WAR, 58 00:02:43,730 --> 00:02:46,232 YOU SHOULD MAKE THE LOVE. 59 00:02:46,232 --> 00:02:48,234 DOES ANYBODY FANCY THIS ITALIAN, 60 00:02:48,234 --> 00:02:49,735 BEFORE WE SHOOT HIM? 61 00:02:49,736 --> 00:02:52,739 HE COULD BE QUITE AMUSING, I SUPPOSE, 62 00:02:52,739 --> 00:02:54,240 FOR AN HOUR OR TWO. 63 00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:56,742 I HAVE THE LAST REQUEST. 64 00:02:56,743 --> 00:02:57,744 Denise: WHAT IS IT? 65 00:02:57,744 --> 00:02:59,245 I MUST WEAR THE BLINDFOLD. 66 00:02:59,245 --> 00:03:00,246 BEFORE YOU ARE SHOT? 67 00:03:00,246 --> 00:03:02,248 BEFORE I MAKE THE LOVE. 68 00:03:04,250 --> 00:03:05,751 WHAT IS ALL THIS TALK OF SHOOTING? 69 00:03:05,752 --> 00:03:07,253 IF WE ARE CLEVER, 70 00:03:07,253 --> 00:03:09,255 WE CAN GET FOR THE GERMANS A LARGE RANSOM. 71 00:03:09,255 --> 00:03:11,257 SPEAKING FOR MYSELF, 72 00:03:11,257 --> 00:03:13,259 I THINK THAT WHAT THE HOLY FATHER IS SAYING 73 00:03:13,259 --> 00:03:14,760 IS VERY SENSIBLE. 74 00:03:14,761 --> 00:03:16,763 WELL, I SAY GET RID OF THEM. 75 00:03:16,763 --> 00:03:17,764 SHOOT THEM! 76 00:03:17,764 --> 00:03:19,265 NO, NO, NO. LET US NOT BE HASTY. 77 00:03:19,265 --> 00:03:22,268 NOW LOOK, WE ARE ALL GOOD COMMUNISTS, 78 00:03:22,268 --> 00:03:23,769 WHY DO WE NOT FORM A COMMITTEE? 79 00:03:23,770 --> 00:03:24,771 HAVE A DEBATE? 80 00:03:24,771 --> 00:03:27,273 PUT A MOTION ON THE TABLE? 81 00:03:27,273 --> 00:03:28,774 YOU NEED PARTY FUNDS. 82 00:03:28,775 --> 00:03:30,276 WE COULD START A NEWSPAPER, 83 00:03:30,276 --> 00:03:31,777 ADVERTISE FOR NEW MEMBERS. 84 00:03:31,778 --> 00:03:32,779 HE IS RIGHT. 85 00:03:32,779 --> 00:03:34,280 THIS WE WILL DO. 86 00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:35,781 THANK YOU, FATHER. 87 00:03:35,782 --> 00:03:38,284 MAY I KISS YOUR RING? 88 00:03:39,285 --> 00:03:41,787 THAT WILL NOT BE NECESSARY. 89 00:03:41,788 --> 00:03:43,790 THE THANKS WILL BE ENOUGH. 90 00:03:49,295 --> 00:03:51,297 CAN YOU SEE ANYTHING, HERR FLICK? 91 00:03:51,297 --> 00:03:52,798 PASS ME THE BINOCULARS. 92 00:03:52,799 --> 00:03:54,300 YES, HERR FLICK. 93 00:03:57,303 --> 00:03:59,805 NOT THE MICKEY MOUSE BINOCULARS-- 94 00:03:59,806 --> 00:04:01,307 THE POWERFUL GESTAPO BINOCULARS. 95 00:04:01,307 --> 00:04:02,808 YES, HERR FLICK. 96 00:04:08,314 --> 00:04:09,815 WHAT DO YOU SEE? 97 00:04:10,817 --> 00:04:14,320 THE COLONEL, THE LIEUTENANT, AND THE ITALIAN CAPTAIN 98 00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:16,322 HAVE BEEN TAKEN INTO THE SAWMILL 99 00:04:16,322 --> 00:04:19,325 BY ROUGH, WORKING CLASS WOMEN WITH GUNS. 100 00:04:20,326 --> 00:04:23,329 WE MUST ASSUME THAT THEIR PLANS HAVE FAILED. 101 00:04:24,330 --> 00:04:25,331 WHAT DO WE DO NOW? 102 00:04:25,331 --> 00:04:27,333 WHEEL ME BACK TO MY HEADQUARTERS. 103 00:04:27,333 --> 00:04:28,334 YES, HERR FLICK. 104 00:04:28,334 --> 00:04:29,835 AND DO NOT GO OVER ANY BUMPS, 105 00:04:29,836 --> 00:04:31,838 AS I WISH TO GO TO THE POTTY. 106 00:04:37,010 --> 00:04:39,012 HOW MANY KILOS DO YOU WISH? 107 00:04:39,012 --> 00:04:41,514 NO, I HAVE CHANGED MY MIND. 108 00:04:41,514 --> 00:04:44,016 SHE'S CHANGED HER MIND, SHE SAYS. 109 00:04:44,017 --> 00:04:47,020 HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF I SQUEEZE YOUR GRAPEFRUIT 110 00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:48,021 AND CHANGE MY MIND? 111 00:04:59,032 --> 00:05:00,033 GOOD MOANING. 112 00:05:02,035 --> 00:05:03,536 GOOD MORNING, OFFICER. 113 00:05:03,536 --> 00:05:06,539 I WISH TO GIVE YOU A MASSAGE. 114 00:05:09,042 --> 00:05:11,044 COME INTO THE CAFE. 115 00:05:13,046 --> 00:05:14,047 I SAY, CARSTAIRS, 116 00:05:14,047 --> 00:05:18,051 CRABTREE, THE BRAVE ENGLISH AGENT, APPROACHES. 117 00:05:18,051 --> 00:05:20,053 OH, GOOD SHOW. 118 00:05:20,053 --> 00:05:21,554 MAYBE HE'LL HAVE WIND OF AN ESCAPE PLAN FOR US. 119 00:05:21,554 --> 00:05:26,058 I HOPE NOT. IT'S RATHER A NICE DAY AND I'M ENJOYING THE WINE. 120 00:05:29,062 --> 00:05:30,063 GOOD MOANING. 121 00:05:30,063 --> 00:05:33,566 WHAT A NICE DO IT IS, WITH ALL THIS SIN. 122 00:05:33,566 --> 00:05:35,067 WHAT'S HE TALKING ABOUT? 123 00:05:35,068 --> 00:05:36,569 I DON'T KNOW. 124 00:05:36,569 --> 00:05:38,070 HE'S SPEAKING FRENCH AGAIN. 125 00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:39,572 SORRY, CHAPS. 126 00:05:39,572 --> 00:05:41,073 ANY ESCAPE PLANS? 127 00:05:41,074 --> 00:05:44,577 WELL, NOT TODAY I'M AFRAID. BUT WE'RE WORKING ON IT. 128 00:05:44,577 --> 00:05:46,078 THEN COULD YOU LEND US A BOB OR TWO? 129 00:05:46,079 --> 00:05:48,081 WE THOUGHT WE'D GO TO THE PICTURES THIS AFTERNOON. 130 00:05:49,582 --> 00:05:51,083 HERE YOU ARE, 131 00:05:51,084 --> 00:05:53,086 GO EASY ON THE POPCORN. 132 00:05:56,589 --> 00:05:59,091 ( sobbing ) 133 00:06:04,097 --> 00:06:06,099 WHAT ARE YOU SNIVELING FOR, CHILD? 134 00:06:06,099 --> 00:06:07,600 OH, IT IS RENE. 135 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:09,602 SO LONG HE HAS BEEN AWAY. 136 00:06:11,104 --> 00:06:13,106 DO NOT BLOW YOUR NOSE ON THE PAPER NAPKINS. 137 00:06:13,106 --> 00:06:15,108 THEY COST MONEY. 138 00:06:18,611 --> 00:06:20,112 GOOD MOANING. 139 00:06:22,615 --> 00:06:25,117 PREPARE YOURSELVES FOR A SHICK. 140 00:06:28,121 --> 00:06:31,624 RONNIE AND THE GERMANS AND THE ITALIAN COPTAIN 141 00:06:31,624 --> 00:06:35,127 HAVE BEEN KIPTURED BY THE KIMMUNIST RESOSTANCE. 142 00:06:35,128 --> 00:06:36,129 OH, NO! 143 00:06:36,129 --> 00:06:37,130 OH, NO! 144 00:06:38,131 --> 00:06:41,134 PUT THESE SMELLING SILTS UNDER YOUR NEESES, 145 00:06:41,134 --> 00:06:44,137 AND HAVE A GOOD SNAFF. 146 00:06:45,638 --> 00:06:47,139 RENE HAS BEEN CAPTURED. 147 00:06:47,140 --> 00:06:50,143 YES, WE JUST HID THE NOSE. 148 00:06:52,145 --> 00:06:54,147 SHE MEANS HEARD THE NEWS. 149 00:06:56,649 --> 00:06:57,650 LISTEN, EVERYBODY. 150 00:06:57,650 --> 00:07:00,653 MONSIEUR RENE HAS BEEN CAPTURED. 151 00:07:00,653 --> 00:07:04,156 I ALRODY TILLED THEM. 152 00:07:04,157 --> 00:07:05,158 I HAVE A PLAN. 153 00:07:05,158 --> 00:07:07,160 WE MUST AT ONCE GET ON THE RADIO TO LONDON. 154 00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:08,161 FOLLOW ME. 155 00:07:11,164 --> 00:07:12,665 I LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU. 156 00:07:12,665 --> 00:07:13,666 AH! 157 00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:18,171 ( record music playing ) 158 00:07:18,171 --> 00:07:22,175 ( operatic singing ) ♪ THEY CALL ME MIMI ♪ 159 00:07:22,175 --> 00:07:26,179 ♪ BUT MY NAME ♪ 160 00:07:26,179 --> 00:07:27,680 ♪ IS ♪ 161 00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:31,183 ♪ LUCIA ♪ 162 00:07:31,184 --> 00:07:34,187 ♪ MY STORY ♪ 163 00:07:34,187 --> 00:07:36,689 ♪ IS A SHORT ONE ♪ 164 00:07:36,689 --> 00:07:39,191 - ♪ BUT-- ♪ - ( needle scratch ) 165 00:07:40,693 --> 00:07:42,695 SHORTER THAN I THOUGHT. 166 00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:47,199 AH! 167 00:07:49,702 --> 00:07:51,704 OH, OH. 168 00:07:51,704 --> 00:07:54,707 OH, THOSE STAIRS, MY DICKY TICKER. 169 00:07:54,707 --> 00:07:56,709 'ALLO, LONDON, 'ALLO, LONDON. 170 00:07:56,709 --> 00:07:59,712 I WISH TO SPEAK TO KINGFISHER. 171 00:07:59,712 --> 00:08:00,713 Male voice: 'Allo, 'allo, 172 00:08:00,713 --> 00:08:02,715 this is London calling. 173 00:08:02,715 --> 00:08:04,216 Who is talking? 174 00:08:04,217 --> 00:08:08,221 THIS IS BLUE TIT. 175 00:08:08,221 --> 00:08:10,723 Kingfisher is having lunch. 176 00:08:10,723 --> 00:08:12,224 Call back in 10 minutes. 177 00:08:15,228 --> 00:08:17,230 WHAT IS THIS PLAN YOU HAVE? 178 00:08:17,230 --> 00:08:19,732 WE HAVE THE HATED GERMANS AND THE COMMUNISTS 179 00:08:19,732 --> 00:08:21,233 UNDER ONE ROOF. 180 00:08:21,234 --> 00:08:23,736 IT IS AN IDEAL OPPORTUNITY TO ELIMINATE THEM. 181 00:08:23,736 --> 00:08:25,237 I'M CALLING UP THE R.A.F. 182 00:08:25,238 --> 00:08:27,240 TO DROP THEIR BOMBS ON THE SAWMILL. 183 00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:28,741 BUT MY RENE IS THERE. 184 00:08:28,741 --> 00:08:30,743 THE BOMBS FROM THE BOMBER COULD KILL HIM. 185 00:08:30,743 --> 00:08:31,744 GOOD. 186 00:08:33,746 --> 00:08:36,248 BUT WHAT IS THE SACRIFICE OF ONE LIFE, 187 00:08:36,249 --> 00:08:38,251 WHEN WE CAN GET RID OF SO MANY OF OUR ENEMIES? 188 00:08:38,251 --> 00:08:39,252 BUT MAM'ZELLE, 189 00:08:39,252 --> 00:08:41,754 ARE THE COMMUNISTS NOT FRENCHMEN? 190 00:08:41,754 --> 00:08:44,256 YES, BUT IF WE DO NOT GET RID OF THEM, 191 00:08:44,257 --> 00:08:45,758 THEY WILL TAKE OVER AFTER THE WAR. 192 00:08:45,758 --> 00:08:47,760 I CAN NOT LET YOU DO THIS TO RENE. 193 00:08:47,760 --> 00:08:48,761 HE WOULD BE PROUD 194 00:08:48,761 --> 00:08:50,763 TO SACRIFICE HIMSELF FOR FRANCE. 195 00:08:50,763 --> 00:08:54,266 I WOULD NOT BE TOO SURE OF THAT. 196 00:08:54,267 --> 00:08:55,268 IF I MAY SAY SO, 197 00:08:55,268 --> 00:08:57,270 I THINK HE WILL DIE A HAPPY MAN, 198 00:08:57,270 --> 00:08:59,772 KNOWING THAT I WILL MARRY YOU, 199 00:08:59,772 --> 00:09:01,273 DEAR LADY, 200 00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:03,776 AND LOOK AFTER YOU TENDERLY FOR THE FEW YEARS 201 00:09:03,776 --> 00:09:05,778 REMAINING TO ME-- 202 00:09:05,778 --> 00:09:09,281 BEFORE LEAVING TO YOU THE VAST AMOUNT OF MONEY 203 00:09:09,282 --> 00:09:11,784 I HAVE IN A SWISS BANK ACCOUNT, 204 00:09:14,787 --> 00:09:16,789 THE NUMBER OF WHICH I WILL GIVE YOU, 205 00:09:16,789 --> 00:09:20,793 JUST BEFORE WE BLOW OUT THE CANDLE 206 00:09:20,793 --> 00:09:23,295 ON THE NIGHT OF OUR HONEYMOON. 207 00:09:23,296 --> 00:09:25,798 IT IS A GOOD OFFER. TAKE IT. 208 00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:33,406 HERE IS YOUR DINNER, PIGS. 209 00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:38,911 LOOKS LIKE DOG FOOD. 210 00:09:38,911 --> 00:09:40,913 IT IS DOG FOOD. 211 00:09:40,913 --> 00:09:43,415 HOW DO WE EAT IT, WITH OUR HANDS 212 00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:44,917 TIED BEHIND OUR BACKS? 213 00:09:44,917 --> 00:09:46,919 HOW DO DOGS EAT? 214 00:09:46,919 --> 00:09:48,420 SHE IS A BEAUTIFUL LADY, 215 00:09:48,421 --> 00:09:50,423 BUT WHAT A COW. 216 00:09:51,924 --> 00:09:53,425 THIS SITUATION IS GETTING 217 00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:56,429 MORE AND MORE SERIOUS EVERY MINUTE. 218 00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:58,431 FORTUNATELY, THEIR LEADER SEEMS TO BE 219 00:09:58,431 --> 00:10:00,433 ON VERY GOOD TERMS WITH RENE. 220 00:10:00,433 --> 00:10:02,935 WHAT DOES SHE SEE IN HIM WHEN THERE IS ME? 221 00:10:02,935 --> 00:10:04,436 WITH THE FIGURE, 222 00:10:04,437 --> 00:10:06,439 THE UNIFORM WITH THE MEDALS, 223 00:10:06,439 --> 00:10:07,940 THE HANDSOME FACE WITH THE BROAD SMILE 224 00:10:07,940 --> 00:10:10,442 AND THE STRONG WHITE TEETH? 225 00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:12,945 PERHAPS SHE DOESN'T LIKE THE DEAD CHICKEN ON YOUR HEAD. 226 00:10:17,950 --> 00:10:20,452 I HAVE PERSUADED THEM NOT TO KILL YOU. 227 00:10:20,453 --> 00:10:22,955 OH, THANK YOU, RENE. 228 00:10:22,955 --> 00:10:25,457 I SHALL BE FOREVER IN YOUR DEBT. 229 00:10:26,959 --> 00:10:29,461 THEY HAVE ASKED ME TO NEGOTIATE FOR YOU A RANSOM. 230 00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:30,963 HOW MUCH ARE THEY ASKING? 231 00:10:30,963 --> 00:10:33,966 1,000,000 FRANCS FOR THE GERMANS. 232 00:10:33,966 --> 00:10:36,969 HOW MUCH FOR THE CAPTAIN OF THE BRAVE ITALIAN ARMY? 233 00:10:36,969 --> 00:10:38,971 10 TINS OF BAKED BEANS. 234 00:10:40,973 --> 00:10:43,475 HAVE YOU RECOVERED THE REAL PAINTINGS 235 00:10:43,476 --> 00:10:44,477 FROM THEIR SECRET HIDING PLACE? 236 00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:46,479 UM, NOT YET, NO. 237 00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,981 GO AND GET THEM. NOW! 238 00:10:48,981 --> 00:10:50,482 YES, COLONEL. KEEP CAVEE. 239 00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:55,488 I HAVE THEM, COLONEL. 240 00:10:56,989 --> 00:10:58,991 PUT THEM DOWN GRUBER'S TROUSERS. 241 00:11:06,999 --> 00:11:09,001 WOULD YOU LIKE THEM DOWN THE LEFT SIDE, 242 00:11:09,001 --> 00:11:10,002 OR THE RIGHT? 243 00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:13,506 I THINK, IF IT IS ALL THE SAME TO YOU, 244 00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:15,007 ONE ON EACH SIDE. 245 00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:19,512 THIS IS THE FALLEN MADONNA WITH THE BIG BOOBIES 246 00:11:19,512 --> 00:11:21,013 BY VAN CLOMP. 247 00:11:24,016 --> 00:11:27,019 THIS IS THE CRACKED VASE WITH THE BIG DAISIES. 248 00:11:28,020 --> 00:11:29,521 OOH, OOH. 249 00:11:32,024 --> 00:11:34,026 I HAD NOT FORMERLY REALIZED 250 00:11:34,026 --> 00:11:36,028 HOW COARSE WAS THE CANVAS 251 00:11:36,028 --> 00:11:37,529 USED BY VAN GOGH. 252 00:11:38,531 --> 00:11:40,533 HE PROBABLY PAINTED IT ON THE SKIRT 253 00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:41,534 OF SOME OLD NATIVE. 254 00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:45,037 LET US HOPE HE WASHED IT FIRST. 255 00:11:45,037 --> 00:11:46,038 I HEAR THEM COMING. 256 00:11:48,541 --> 00:11:49,542 OH! 257 00:11:51,043 --> 00:11:53,545 GOOD LUCK, MY BRAVE, CHILDHOOD SWEETHEART. 258 00:11:53,546 --> 00:11:54,547 YES. 259 00:11:54,547 --> 00:11:56,549 IF THE RANSOM IS PAID, 260 00:11:56,549 --> 00:11:59,552 YOU WILL BE RELEASED MORE OR LESS UNHARMED. 261 00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:00,553 IF NOT-- 262 00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:01,554 BANG, 263 00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:03,556 BANG, 264 00:12:03,556 --> 00:12:05,057 BANG. 265 00:12:06,058 --> 00:12:08,060 THE GENERAL WILL PAY. 266 00:12:08,060 --> 00:12:09,561 EMBRACE ME. 267 00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:10,563 OH, YES. 268 00:12:12,064 --> 00:12:14,566 EMBRACE ME, ALSO. 269 00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:15,568 THIS IS MY MAN, 270 00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:17,069 AND I WILL KILL ANY OTHER WOMAN 271 00:12:17,069 --> 00:12:18,570 WHO TRIES TO COME BETWEEN US! 272 00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:19,572 YOU AND WHO ELSE? 273 00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:20,573 JUST GET YOUR HANDS OFF HIM. 274 00:12:20,573 --> 00:12:22,575 LADIES, LADIES, PLEASE. 275 00:12:24,076 --> 00:12:25,577 YOU HAVE HAD A HARD DAY. 276 00:12:25,578 --> 00:12:28,080 THE KETTLE IS ON, NOW JUST CONTROL YOURSELVES. 277 00:12:29,081 --> 00:12:31,083 THIS OVERWEIGHT FROG, 278 00:12:31,083 --> 00:12:32,084 WHAT'S HE GOT, EH? 279 00:12:32,084 --> 00:12:34,586 WHY ALL THE GIRLS GOT THE HOTS FOR HIM? 280 00:12:34,587 --> 00:12:38,090 IT IS BECAUSE HE IS ALL MAN. 281 00:12:39,091 --> 00:12:41,593 FAREWELL, FAREWELL. 282 00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:43,596 WOULD IT BE ALL RIGHT IF I TOOK WITH ME 283 00:12:43,596 --> 00:12:45,598 THE OLD PEASANT AND THE BABY? 284 00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:47,099 IS IT YOUR BABY? 285 00:12:47,099 --> 00:12:50,102 NO, I FOUND IT ON A DOORSTEP. 286 00:12:50,102 --> 00:12:54,106 I WAS JUST GOING TO LEAVE IT OUTSIDE THE NUNNERY 287 00:12:54,106 --> 00:12:57,109 WHEN I SUDDENLY THOUGHT ONE OF THEM MIGHT BE BLAMED. 288 00:12:57,109 --> 00:12:59,111 I WILL JUST DROP IT OFF AT THE ORPHANAGE. 289 00:12:59,111 --> 00:13:01,113 NO. NO, IT IS BETTER 290 00:13:01,113 --> 00:13:03,615 THAT THE POOR CHILD BE LOOKED AFTER BY WOMEN. 291 00:13:05,117 --> 00:13:06,618 BUT SURELY IT WOULD GET IN YOUR WAY 292 00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:09,121 WHEN YOU ARE KILLING GERMANS AND BLOWING THINGS UP? 293 00:13:09,121 --> 00:13:11,123 WE HAVE MANY SYMPATHIZERS. 294 00:13:11,123 --> 00:13:13,625 IT WILL BE WELL CARED FOR. 295 00:13:13,626 --> 00:13:15,127 WHO KNOWS, 296 00:13:15,127 --> 00:13:16,128 IN TIME, 297 00:13:16,128 --> 00:13:18,130 YOU AND I MAY ADOPT IT, 298 00:13:18,130 --> 00:13:19,131 AND BRING IT UP AS OUR OWN. 299 00:13:21,634 --> 00:13:24,136 THAT IS A VERY NICE THOUGHT, DENISE. 300 00:13:24,136 --> 00:13:26,638 BUT WOULD IT NOT BE EASIER IF I JUST WENT 301 00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:28,140 AND CHANGED IT FOR A PRETTIER ONE? 302 00:13:31,644 --> 00:13:33,646 NO, THE WORRY OF BEING AN ORPHAN 303 00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:36,148 HAS ALREADY MADE HER LOOK OLD BEYOND HER YEARS. 304 00:13:38,150 --> 00:13:39,651 GO NOW. YOU HAVE A MISSION TO FULFILL. 305 00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:41,654 OH, YES. COME, MONSIEUR. 306 00:13:41,654 --> 00:13:42,655 YES. 307 00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:43,656 'SCUSE. 308 00:13:45,124 --> 00:13:46,158 ( phone rings ) 309 00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:49,662 GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN SPEAKING. 310 00:13:49,662 --> 00:13:51,664 DO YOU KNOW WHO THIS IS? 311 00:13:51,664 --> 00:13:52,665 No. 312 00:13:52,665 --> 00:13:53,666 GOOD. 313 00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,670 IN THAT CASE, I CAN TELL YOU 314 00:13:57,670 --> 00:14:00,172 THAT COLONEL VON STROHM, LIEUTENANT GRUBER, 315 00:14:00,172 --> 00:14:02,174 AND CAPTAIN BERTORELLI, 316 00:14:02,174 --> 00:14:04,676 HAVE BEEN CAPTURED BY THE COMMUNIST RESISTANCE, 317 00:14:04,677 --> 00:14:09,181 AND UNLESS YOU PAY A RANSOM OF 1,000,000 FRANCS, 318 00:14:09,181 --> 00:14:10,682 THEY WILL BE SHOT. 319 00:14:12,184 --> 00:14:13,185 LET THEM BE SHOT. 320 00:14:17,690 --> 00:14:20,192 'ALLO? HE HAS HUNG UP. 321 00:14:20,192 --> 00:14:21,693 WHAT DID HE SAY? 322 00:14:21,694 --> 00:14:23,195 HE SAID, "LET THEM BE SHOT." 323 00:14:23,195 --> 00:14:26,198 OH, HOW RUTHLESS ARE THESE GERMANS. 324 00:14:26,198 --> 00:14:28,200 IF HE DOES NOT CARE WHAT HAPPENS TO THEM, 325 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:29,201 WHY SHOULD WE? 326 00:14:29,201 --> 00:14:30,702 THEY ARE THE ENEMY. 327 00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:32,204 AND MICHELLE HAS ARRANGED FOR THE R.A.F. 328 00:14:32,204 --> 00:14:34,206 TO DROP BOMBS ON THEM TOMORROW NIGHT. 329 00:14:34,206 --> 00:14:35,707 HANG ON, HOW DID YOU KNOW 330 00:14:35,708 --> 00:14:37,710 THAT I WOULD NOT BE THERE? 331 00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:40,713 IT IS WAR, MONSIEUR. WE HAD TO TAKE A CHANCE. 332 00:14:40,713 --> 00:14:42,715 BUT I HAVE LEFT MIMI THERE, 333 00:14:42,715 --> 00:14:44,717 AND SHE HAS GOT THE REAL PAINTINGS WITH HER. 334 00:14:44,717 --> 00:14:46,719 MICHELLE, YOU MUST STOP THOSE BOMBERS. 335 00:14:46,719 --> 00:14:48,220 I CANNOT. 336 00:14:48,220 --> 00:14:49,721 THE BATTERY ON THE RADIO IS FLAT. 337 00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:52,725 BUT HOW ARE WE GOING TO FIND 1,000,000 FRANCS FOR THE RANSOM? 338 00:14:52,725 --> 00:14:55,227 DEAR MONSIEUR ALPHONSE, 339 00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:57,729 ALL THE MONEY IN YOUR SWISS BANK ACCOUNT, 340 00:14:57,730 --> 00:14:58,731 COULD WE NOT BORROW IT? 341 00:15:00,733 --> 00:15:03,736 SUDDENLY I'VE FORGOTTEN THE NUMBER, 342 00:15:03,736 --> 00:15:05,738 AND THE SWISS BANK 343 00:15:05,738 --> 00:15:07,740 IS CLOSED FOR THE BANK HOLIDAY, 344 00:15:07,740 --> 00:15:10,242 AND MY DICKY TICKER IS ACTING UP AGAIN. 345 00:15:10,242 --> 00:15:12,244 I CANNOT FORGE 346 00:15:12,244 --> 00:15:14,746 A MILLION FRANCS BY TOMORROW. 347 00:15:14,747 --> 00:15:16,248 I HAVE IT, IT IS SIMPLE. 348 00:15:16,248 --> 00:15:18,750 WE WILL STEAL IT FROM THE VAULT IN THE BANK. 349 00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:20,753 STEAL IT FROM THE VAULT IN THE BANK, SHE SAYS. 350 00:15:20,753 --> 00:15:23,255 HOW ARE YOU GOING TO STEAL IT FROM THE BANK? 351 00:15:23,255 --> 00:15:26,758 WE HAVE HERE THE GREATEST SAFECRACKER IN ALL FRANCE. 352 00:15:30,262 --> 00:15:32,264 WE WILL BLOW THE SAFE, 353 00:15:32,264 --> 00:15:33,765 TAKE 1,000,000 FRANCS, 354 00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:35,768 PAY THE RANSOM, AND SAVE THE LIFE OF MIMI. 355 00:15:35,768 --> 00:15:37,269 IT IS DECIDED. 356 00:15:37,269 --> 00:15:38,770 I AM NOT GOING TO ROB A BANK! 357 00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:40,272 I WOULD GET LIFE-- 358 00:15:40,272 --> 00:15:41,773 OR EVEN LONGER. 359 00:15:43,275 --> 00:15:44,776 IN THAT CASE, WE WILL NOT BE ABLE 360 00:15:44,777 --> 00:15:48,280 TO RECOVER THE PAINTINGS, AND WE WILL BE POOR FOREVER. 361 00:15:48,280 --> 00:15:50,282 OH, RENE, 362 00:15:50,282 --> 00:15:52,284 THINK OF WHAT YOU COULD DO WITH THE MONEY. 363 00:15:55,287 --> 00:15:57,289 OH, THIS GREED WITHIN ME, 364 00:15:58,290 --> 00:16:01,793 IT IS LIKE BEING SHACKLED TO A MADMAN. 365 00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,295 I WILL DO IT. 366 00:16:03,295 --> 00:16:06,298 MADEMOISELLE, I ALSO HAVE MONEY IN THAT BANK. 367 00:16:06,298 --> 00:16:08,800 HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU WILL NOT BE STEALING MINE? 368 00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,302 YOU WILL BE COMING WITH US. 369 00:16:10,302 --> 00:16:12,304 WE WILL MEET AT THE BANK AT MIDNIGHT. 370 00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:18,811 YOU ARE LOOKING VERY PENSIVE, HERR FLICK, 371 00:16:18,811 --> 00:16:20,813 AND YOUR BROW IS FURROWED 372 00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:22,314 LIKE A PLOWED FIELD. 373 00:16:22,314 --> 00:16:24,316 WHAT IS THE REASON FOR THIS? 374 00:16:24,316 --> 00:16:26,318 I AM HATCHING A PLOT. 375 00:16:26,318 --> 00:16:29,321 I WAS INTENDING TO OBTAIN THAT PAINTING, 376 00:16:29,321 --> 00:16:31,823 TO SELL AFTER THE WAR, IN ORDER TO MARRY YOU. 377 00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:32,825 CORRECT. 378 00:16:32,825 --> 00:16:34,326 THERE IS, HOWEVER, 379 00:16:34,326 --> 00:16:36,328 A SWIFTER WAY OF OBTAINING MONEY. 380 00:16:36,328 --> 00:16:38,330 WHAT IS THIS, HERR FLICK? 381 00:16:38,330 --> 00:16:40,332 BY PRETENDING TO BE A MEMBER 382 00:16:40,332 --> 00:16:41,333 OF THE COMMUNIST RESISTANCE. 383 00:16:41,333 --> 00:16:42,834 I WILL TELEPHONE THE GENERAL 384 00:16:42,835 --> 00:16:44,837 AND DEMAND HE PAY A RANSOM 385 00:16:44,837 --> 00:16:47,339 FOR THE RETURN OF THE GERMAN OFFICERS. 386 00:16:47,339 --> 00:16:50,342 IT IS A DEVIOUS AND BRILLIANT PLAN, HERR FLICK. 387 00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:51,843 I KNOW. 388 00:16:56,849 --> 00:16:58,350 'ALLO, 'ALLO. 389 00:16:58,350 --> 00:17:00,352 IS THIS GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN? 390 00:17:00,352 --> 00:17:01,353 SPEAKING. 391 00:17:01,353 --> 00:17:06,358 I AM A FRENCH PEASANT, WORKING FOR THE RESISTANCE. 392 00:17:06,358 --> 00:17:09,361 IF YOUR GERMAN OFFICERS ALIVE YOU WISH TO SEE, 393 00:17:09,361 --> 00:17:12,364 YOU WILL A RANSOM OF 2,000,000 FRANCS PAY. 394 00:17:12,364 --> 00:17:13,365 YOU FOOLISH FELLOW. 395 00:17:13,365 --> 00:17:15,867 IF I WILL NOT PAY A RANSOM OF 1,000,000 FRANCS, 396 00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:17,369 WHY SHOULD I PAY 2,000,000? 397 00:17:20,372 --> 00:17:21,373 HE WILL NOT PAY. 398 00:17:21,373 --> 00:17:23,875 THESE GERMAN GENERALS, 399 00:17:23,876 --> 00:17:25,878 THEY ARE RUTHLESS SCOUNDRELS. 400 00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:27,379 WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO? 401 00:17:27,379 --> 00:17:30,882 I SHALL KICK VON SMALLHAUSEN WITH MY GOOD LEG. 402 00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:33,886 WHAT WRONG HAS HE DONE? 403 00:17:33,886 --> 00:17:35,387 NONE. 404 00:17:35,387 --> 00:17:37,389 BUT I SHALL FEEL BETTER FOR IT. 405 00:17:51,637 --> 00:17:53,639 THERE IS THE DOOR OF THE VAULT. 406 00:17:53,639 --> 00:17:56,141 BREAK IN, I WILL KEEP WATCH OUTSIDE. 407 00:17:56,141 --> 00:17:57,642 SHOULD ANYONE APPROACH, 408 00:17:57,643 --> 00:17:59,645 I WILL HOOT LIKE AN OWL. 409 00:17:59,645 --> 00:18:01,647 LOOK, YOU STAY HERE, 410 00:18:01,647 --> 00:18:03,148 I WILL HOOT LIKE AN OWL. 411 00:18:03,148 --> 00:18:04,649 LILY-LIVER. 412 00:18:04,650 --> 00:18:05,651 I AM THE BOSS, 413 00:18:05,651 --> 00:18:07,152 YOU WILL DO AS YOU ARE TOLD. 414 00:18:09,655 --> 00:18:12,157 I THINK IT IS A VERY STRONG DOOR. 415 00:18:12,157 --> 00:18:13,658 IT WILL NEED A LOT OF EXPLOSIVE. 416 00:18:13,659 --> 00:18:16,161 IT WILL BE A BIG BANG. 417 00:18:16,161 --> 00:18:17,662 DO NOT WORRY. 418 00:18:17,663 --> 00:18:20,165 I HAVE SEEN THESE DOORS BEFORE. 419 00:18:20,165 --> 00:18:24,169 I OPENED ONE IN DIJON, IN 1931. 420 00:18:24,169 --> 00:18:26,171 A BANK? 421 00:18:26,171 --> 00:18:28,173 NO, THE MUSTARD FACTORY. 422 00:18:30,175 --> 00:18:31,676 SH, SH, SH, SH! 423 00:18:33,178 --> 00:18:34,679 WHAT CAN YOU HEAR? 424 00:18:36,181 --> 00:18:38,183 RUST. 425 00:18:38,183 --> 00:18:39,184 HURRY UP. 426 00:18:39,184 --> 00:18:41,186 ( owl hoot ) 427 00:18:41,186 --> 00:18:42,687 MY GOD, THE OWL. 428 00:18:42,688 --> 00:18:43,689 SOMEBODY IS COMING. 429 00:18:45,691 --> 00:18:47,192 GOOD MOANING. 430 00:18:51,697 --> 00:18:54,199 DO IT TAKE IT YOU ARE RIBBING THE BONK? 431 00:18:55,701 --> 00:18:58,704 YES, WE ARE RIBBING THE BONK. 432 00:18:58,704 --> 00:19:00,706 BUT THAT IS AGAINST THE LOO. 433 00:19:02,207 --> 00:19:04,709 IT IS LICKY FOR YOU THAT I AM ON YOUR SAWED. 434 00:19:06,712 --> 00:19:07,713 EVERYBODY, 435 00:19:07,713 --> 00:19:09,214 I HAVE DONE IT. 436 00:19:15,721 --> 00:19:18,223 BUT, THIS IS A BIGGLARY, 437 00:19:18,223 --> 00:19:21,226 A VERY BOG BIGGLARY. 438 00:19:21,226 --> 00:19:24,229 LOOK, YOU GO OUTSIDE AND KEEP WATCH WITH MICHELLE. 439 00:19:24,229 --> 00:19:27,732 ANYONE APPROACHES, I WILL HOOT LIKE AN EEL. 440 00:19:30,736 --> 00:19:32,237 GET TO WORK ON THESE BOXES. 441 00:19:32,237 --> 00:19:34,239 NO, NO! NOT THAT ONE. IT IS MINE. 442 00:19:34,239 --> 00:19:36,241 I WILL CHECK IT WHILE I'M HERE. 443 00:19:37,743 --> 00:19:40,245 THIS ONE IS FULL OF PAPERS. 444 00:19:40,245 --> 00:19:42,247 IT IS SOMEBODY'S WILL. 445 00:19:42,247 --> 00:19:44,249 THIS ONE IS EMPTY. 446 00:19:44,249 --> 00:19:46,251 IT IS THE BAKER'S. 447 00:19:46,251 --> 00:19:49,254 OH, HE HAS LEFT NOTHING TO HIS WIFE; 448 00:19:49,254 --> 00:19:51,256 ALL TO HIS MISTRESS. 449 00:19:52,257 --> 00:19:54,259 I THINK IT IS ALL HERE. 450 00:19:54,259 --> 00:19:55,760 ( creaking ) 451 00:19:55,761 --> 00:19:56,762 QUICK, THE DOOR! 452 00:19:56,762 --> 00:19:57,763 Rene: MY GOD! 453 00:19:58,764 --> 00:20:00,265 OH NO. WE ARE TRAPPED! 454 00:20:00,265 --> 00:20:02,267 HOW ARE WE GOING TO GET OUT OF HERE? 455 00:20:02,267 --> 00:20:03,768 WE CANNOT. 456 00:20:03,769 --> 00:20:05,771 IT IS ON A TIME SWITCH. 457 00:20:05,771 --> 00:20:08,273 WE MUST WAIT FOR THE BANK TO OPEN. 458 00:20:08,273 --> 00:20:10,775 MY GOD, I WILL GET LIFE FOR THIS. 459 00:20:10,776 --> 00:20:13,779 OH MY, I AM GETTING THE CLAUSTROPHOBIA. 460 00:20:13,779 --> 00:20:15,280 RENE, HOLD ME. 461 00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:18,783 MY POOR CHILD. TAKE-- TAKE DEEP BREATHS. 462 00:20:18,784 --> 00:20:20,786 ( breathes heavily ) 463 00:20:21,787 --> 00:20:24,289 NOT THAT DEEP. YOU ARE USING UP ALL THE AIR. 464 00:20:25,290 --> 00:20:27,292 QUICK, I HAVE AN IDEA. 465 00:20:27,292 --> 00:20:29,794 I STILL HAVE THE PLASTIC EXPLOSIVE. 466 00:20:29,795 --> 00:20:31,797 WE CAN BLOW OPEN THE DOOR. 467 00:20:31,797 --> 00:20:33,799 QUICK, BEFORE WE ALL SUFFOCATE. 468 00:20:33,799 --> 00:20:35,300 OH, MY DICKY TICKER. 469 00:20:35,300 --> 00:20:37,302 GIVE TO ME THE STETHOSCOPE. 470 00:20:37,302 --> 00:20:38,303 ( wheezes ) 471 00:20:38,303 --> 00:20:39,304 OH, GOD. 472 00:20:42,808 --> 00:20:44,810 IT HAS STOPPED. I AM DEAD. 473 00:20:45,811 --> 00:20:47,813 YOUR END HAS FALLEN OFF. 474 00:20:47,813 --> 00:20:48,814 OH NO! 475 00:20:51,817 --> 00:20:53,819 Edith: THE LIGHTS, THEY ARE DIMMING! 476 00:20:53,819 --> 00:20:55,821 Leclerc: WHAT IS HAPPENING? 477 00:20:55,821 --> 00:20:57,823 I CANNOT WORK WITHOUT LIGHT. 478 00:20:57,823 --> 00:20:59,825 AH! I HAVE THE MATCHES. 479 00:20:59,825 --> 00:21:01,827 - GIVE THEM HERE, QUICK. - HERE. 480 00:21:01,827 --> 00:21:02,828 LIGHT, LIGHT. 481 00:21:09,334 --> 00:21:11,336 WHO PUT ALL THE DEAD ONES BACK IN THE BOX? 482 00:21:12,337 --> 00:21:13,838 QUICK, IT IS GOING! 483 00:21:14,840 --> 00:21:15,841 OH! 484 00:21:15,841 --> 00:21:17,342 THERE IS ONLY ONE MATCH. 485 00:21:17,342 --> 00:21:18,843 AND I MUST HAVE THAT 486 00:21:18,844 --> 00:21:20,846 TO LIGHT THE FUSE. 487 00:21:22,347 --> 00:21:23,348 Rene: OH MY GOD. 488 00:21:23,348 --> 00:21:24,849 Leclerc: AH, NOW I CANNOT SEE 489 00:21:24,850 --> 00:21:27,352 TO PUT THE PLASTIC EXPLOSIVE. 490 00:21:27,352 --> 00:21:28,853 LIGHT, I MUST HAVE MORE LIGHT. 491 00:21:30,355 --> 00:21:31,356 QUICK, KEEP IT GOING. 492 00:21:31,356 --> 00:21:32,357 GIVE ME SOME PAPERS. 493 00:21:33,358 --> 00:21:35,360 - HERE, HERE. - OH MY GOD! 494 00:21:35,360 --> 00:21:37,362 THAT IS MY DEPOSIT BOX. 495 00:21:37,362 --> 00:21:40,365 MY MONEY! THEY'RE BURNING MY MONEY! 496 00:21:40,365 --> 00:21:42,367 PLEASE, THESE ARE 5000 FRANC NOTES. 497 00:21:42,367 --> 00:21:44,869 I'M SORRY, MONSIEUR, 498 00:21:44,870 --> 00:21:46,371 BUT WE NEED THE LIGHT. 499 00:21:46,371 --> 00:21:47,372 OH BUT MADAME, IN THE NAME OF HEAVEN, 500 00:21:47,372 --> 00:21:49,374 BURN THE 1000s! 501 00:21:49,374 --> 00:21:51,876 OH MY GOD, MY NEST EGG. 502 00:21:51,877 --> 00:21:53,378 MY LIFE'S SAVINGS. 503 00:21:53,378 --> 00:21:55,380 NEEDS MUST, MONSIEUR, NEEDS MUST. 504 00:21:55,380 --> 00:21:57,382 BUT MADAME, THINK OF OUR FUTURE. 505 00:21:57,382 --> 00:21:58,883 BURN YOUR KNICKERS. 506 00:22:03,889 --> 00:22:05,891 THEY ARE TAKING A LONG TIME. 507 00:22:05,891 --> 00:22:08,393 DO YOU THINK WE SHOULD HAVE A POKE? 508 00:22:09,895 --> 00:22:10,896 A POKE? 509 00:22:10,896 --> 00:22:13,899 A POKE TO SEE WHAT IS HAPPENING. 510 00:22:18,403 --> 00:22:21,406 I AM READY NOW TO LIGHT THE FUSE. 511 00:22:21,406 --> 00:22:22,407 THANK GOD. 512 00:22:22,407 --> 00:22:23,408 ANOTHER THREE MINUTES, 513 00:22:23,408 --> 00:22:25,410 I WOULD HAVE BEEN BANKRUPT. 514 00:22:25,410 --> 00:22:28,913 LOOK, I HAVE FOUND A BOX FULL OF MONEY. 515 00:22:28,914 --> 00:22:30,415 EVERYBODY, STAND BACK. 516 00:22:34,419 --> 00:22:35,420 BACK, STAND BACK. 517 00:22:37,923 --> 00:22:40,425 CAN YOU HEAR ME INSOD? 518 00:22:41,426 --> 00:22:44,429 IF YOU CAN HEAR ME, 519 00:22:44,429 --> 00:22:46,431 GIVE ME A SOGNAL. 520 00:22:47,432 --> 00:22:49,934 ( explosion ) 521 00:22:53,438 --> 00:22:55,940 ( coughing; gasping ) 522 00:22:59,444 --> 00:23:02,447 ( theme music playing )