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( theme music playing )
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LIFE HAS BECOME
VERY HECTIC FOR ME
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SINCE THE GERMANS
APPOINTED ME EDITOR
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OF THE NEW LOCAL NEWSPAPER.
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I AM SUPPOSED TO MAKE THEM
SEEM LIKE NICE PEOPLE,
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BUT IT IS NOT
AN EASY TASK.
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I STILL HAVE NOT RECOVERED
FROM THE PICNIC,
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ORGANIZED BY
GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN,
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TO SHOW THE HUMAN SIDE
OF THE GERMAN ARMY,
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WHICH WAS SPOILED
BY HERR FLICK
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AND HERR VON SMALLHAUSEN
OF THE GESTAPO.
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THEY WERE UP
A NEARBY TELEGRAPH POLE
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WHICH HAD BEEN PARTIALLY
SAWN THROUGH
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TO MAKE A RAFT TO GET
THE BRITISH AIRMEN TO ENGLAND.
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THE POLE FELL OVER,
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HERR FLICK
AND HIS COLLEAGUE
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LANDED SPLAT
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PICNIC,
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RUINING THE TRIFLE
AND CUSTARD,
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NOT TO MENTION
THEIR TROUSERS,
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AND I STILL HAVE
THE PICNIC BILL HERE--
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UNPAID.
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OH, OH, MICHELLE,
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YOU WILL GIVE ME
AN HEART ATTACK
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CREEPING AROUND
LIKE THAT.
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I WAS WALKING BEHIND YOU,
LIKE A SHADOW.
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I SAW THREE SHADOWS
AND I THOUGHT IT WAS STRANGE.
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I MUST SPEAK
WITH YOU, URGENTLY.
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I WANT TO TALK
TO YOU, TOO.
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WHEN ARE YOU
GOING TO GET THOSE
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IDIOT BRITISH AIRMEN
OUT OF MY HAIR?
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I AM GETTING
SOME GRAY ONES.
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I DO NOT KNOW.
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SINCE THE GESTAPO
RUINED OUR PLAN
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TO BUILD A RAFT
OF TELEGRAPH POLES,
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WE ARE NOW GOING
TO HAVE TO USE
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EMPTY WINE BARRELS
INSTEAD.
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BUT THAT IS NOT
WHY I HAVE COME.
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THEN WHY?
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THE RESISTANCE HAVE
RUN OUT OF FUNDS.
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I'M LOOKING FOR DONATIONS.
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COME ON, COUGH UP.
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COUGH UP,
WE ARE DESPERATE.
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WE DO NOT HAVE
ANY MONEY TO GIVE YOU.
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OH, THIS CAFE IS
A THRIVING BUSINESS.
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I THINK THE RESISTANCE
SHOULD GET
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A REGULAR CUT
OF THE TAKINGS.
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WHERE IS THE MONEY?
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WE HAVE NOT
TAKEN ANY MONEY,
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AND GIVING MONEY AWAY
IS OUT OF THE QUESTION.
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YOU WOULDN'T
WANT ANY ACCIDENTS TO HAPPEN, WOULD YOU?
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WHAT SORT OF ACCIDENTS?
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( whistle blows )
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( all yell )
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THAT KIND
OF ACCIDENT.
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OH MY GOD.
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COME ON.
WE ARE DESPERATE AND FLAT BROKE.
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OH, A FEW
LOUSY FRANCS!
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WHAT VALUABLES
DO YOU HAVE
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TO SELL
FOR OUR FUNDS?
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WE DO NOT HAVE
ANY VALUABLES!
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RENE, WHAT ABOUT
THE PAINTING
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OF THE FALLEN MADONNA
WITH THE BIG BOOBIES?
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WHAT PAINTING?
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THE ONE YOU
MADE ME GIVE
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TO HERR FLICK
OF THE GESTAPO.
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IT MUST BE
WORTH MILLIONS.
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THEN WE MUST
GET IT BACK AND SELL IT.
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WITH THE MONEY
WE CAN BUY
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FOOD AND GUNS
AND AMMUNITION.
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AND SHAMPOO.
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OH, YES. OF COURSE,
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I'VE MADE
A NOTE OF THAT.
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I WILL GO AND DISCUSS IT
WITH MY GIRLS.
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WE WILL COME UP
WITH A PLAN.
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IF I HAVE A GOOD IDEA,
I WILL LET YOU KNOW.
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IF YOU HAVE A GOOD IDEA,
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WE WILL LET
THE WHOLE TOWN KNOW.
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WHY DID YOU HAVE TO OPEN
YOUR BIG MOUTH
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ABOUT THAT PAINTING?
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I DID IT FOR FRANCE.
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SHE'S A FANATIC,
THAT ONE.
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WE MUST HELP MICHELLE
TO GET THE PAINTING BACK TO SELL AFTER THE WAR.
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BUT THEN SHE WILL
HAVE IT, NOT YOU.
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BETTER IN HER HANDS
THAN IN THE SAFE OF HERR FLICK.
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WE WILL FIND
A WAY TO STEAL IT FROM MICHELLE.
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MY MAD, BRAVE HUSBAND,
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IT IS A DANGEROUS PLAN.
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IF YOU ARE CAUGHT AT IT,
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YOU COULD BE SHOT.
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IT IS A RISK
I HAVE OFTEN TAKEN.
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A FEW MILLION FRANCS
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CAN MAKE A MAN
AWFULLY COURAGEOUS.
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OH, RENE,
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PUT YOUR ARM AROUND ME,
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GIVE ME SOME
OF YOUR COURAGE.
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THAT IS ALL I CAN
SPARE AT THE MOMENT.
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EVERY BIT HELPS.
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SPECIAL DELIVERY
FROM BERLIN, HERR FLICK.
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AH, IT IS
FROM MY GODFATHER,
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HEINRICH HIMMLER.
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I RECOGNIZE
THE SCENTED NOTEPAPER.
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LET US HOPE
HE HAS NOT HEARD
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ABOUT THE COCK-UP
ON THE TELEGRAPH POLE.
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"DEAR OTTO, I HAVE HEARD
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ABOUT THE COCK-UP
ON THE TELEGRAPH POLE."
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WORD GETS ABOUT
QUICKLY, HERR FLICK.
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SILENCE.
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"I AM MOST
DISPLEASED ABOUT IT.
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I HAVE HEARD RUMORS
THAT YOU HAVE BEEN
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CONSORTING WITH WOMEN
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OF THE OPPOSITE SEX.
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ONLY SISSIES
GO OUT WITH GIRLS,
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AND I EXPECT YOU
TO STOP IMMEDIATELY."
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UNCLE HEINIE
IS CUTTING OFF
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OUR EXTRACURRICULAR
CRUMPET.
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HE DOES NOT SAY
ANYTHING ABOUT ME, HERR FLICK.
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"P.S. AND THAT GOES
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FOR YOUR MIDGET FRIEND
AS WELL."
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( knocking )
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SEE WHO IT IS.
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WHO IS OUT THERE?
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IT IS I, HELGA!
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WE ARE NOT ALLOWED
TO TALK TO GIRLS.
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LET HER IN,
VON SMALLHAUSEN.
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I MUST BREAK
THE BAD NEWS TO HER.
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IT IS SO COLD
OUT THERE,
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MY NOSE IS RUNNING.
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SIT DOWN, HELGA.
I HAVE BAD NEWS FOR YOU.
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I REALIZE THAT YOU
WILL NEVER HAVE MET
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SUCH A POWERFUL,
VIRILE MAN AS I.
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AFTER ME, ALL MEN
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WILL BE AN ANTICLIMAX,
I KNOW.
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BUT I MUST
END IT ALL NOW.
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ARE MY EARS HEARING
ME CORRECTLY?
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( sniffs )
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TAKE THIS HANDKERCHIEF,
YOU WILL NEED IT.
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I'M AFRAID
OUR RELATIONSHIP
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IS FINISHED.
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THE LOVE AFFAIR
OF THE CENTURY IS OVER.
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YOU MAY LET
THE TEARS COMMENCE.
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( blowing nose )
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BUT, HERR FLICK,
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AFTER ALL MY DEVOTION
AND LOYALTY TO YOU?
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YOU HAVE NOT BEEN
THAT DEVOTED, HELGA.
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YOU HAVE DALLIED
WITH THE ITALIAN CAPTAIN.
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LIPS OTHER THAN MINE
HAVE TOUCHED YOURS--
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GARLIC STAINED LIPS.
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HOW DARE YOU?!
149
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AFTER ALL I'VE DONE FOR YOU,
YOU CONCEITED LITTLE PIG.
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I DO NOT RECALL ANY
OF THESE THINGS.
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SHE WAS INSULTING ME,
NOT YOU.
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I AM AFRAID, HELGA,
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THAT YOU HAVE
JUST TALKED YOURSELF
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OUT OF THE SHARE
I WAS SAVING FOR YOU
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IN THE PAINTING
OF THE FALLEN MADONNA WITH THE BIG BOOBIES.
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YOU HAVE NOT GOT IT.
157
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IT IS IN MY SAFE,
SO THERE!
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BUT THAT IS NOT POSSIBLE.
FROM WHERE DID YOU GET IT?
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I'M NOT TELLING YOU.
THAT WILL TEACH YOU TO INSULT ME.
160
00:06:06,766 --> 00:06:09,769
NOW HAND VON SMALLHAUSEN
YOUR KEY TO THE DUNGEON.
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OOOH!
IT IS STILL HOT.
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PUT IT ON THE TABLE.
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NOW GO,
AND DO NOT LOOK BACK.
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DO NOT THINK I CARE
ABOUT THE PAINTING.
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I WOULD NOT TAKE
A GIFT FROM YOU
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IF I WERE STARVING
AND PENNILESS.
167
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BUT LET ME TELL YOU
SOMETHING ELSE,
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HERR FLICK
OF THE GESTAPO,
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I'VE HAD MORE THRILLS
STAYING IN AND READING
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THE COLLECTED SPEECHES OF
GOEBBELS IN SERBO-CROAT,
171
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THAN IN GOING OUT
WITH YOU.
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SHE TOOK IT LIKE A MAN,
HERR FLICK.
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SHE HAS ALSO JUST RUINED
MY BEST GESTAPO SUIT!
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UNCLE HEINIE IS RIGHT,
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WE ARE BETTER OFF
WITHOUT WOMEN.
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IN THAT CASE,
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I'VE ALWAYS
BEEN BETTER OFF.
178
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SINCE I LET IT
BE KNOWN
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THE NEWSPAPER WAS
LOOKING FOR SOMEBODY
180
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TO ENCAPSULATE THE TRUE
SPIRIT OF NOUVION,
181
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WE HAVE BEEN INUNDATED
WITH PHOTOGRAPHS
182
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OF YOUNG WOMEN.
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UNGH, AH.
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OH, OHHH!
185
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OH, MY DICKY TICKER.
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IT CANNOT STAND
THE EXCITEMENT.
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HELLO, RENE.
188
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HELLO,
MONSIEUR ALPHONSE.
189
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I HAVE COME
TO BE PHOTOGRAPHED
190
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FOR YOUR SPIRIT
OF NOUVION CONTEST.
191
00:07:30,683 --> 00:07:32,685
AH, MADAME EDITH.
192
00:07:34,187 --> 00:07:37,190
WE THANK YOU FOR GRACING
OUR SMALL NEWSPAPER OFFICE
193
00:07:37,190 --> 00:07:38,691
WITH YOUR PRESENCE.
194
00:07:38,691 --> 00:07:40,693
I WILL ARRANGE
FOR YOU A STOOL.
195
00:07:40,693 --> 00:07:44,196
YOU ARE NOT SERIOUSLY
ENTERING THE CONTEST, ARE YOU?
196
00:07:44,197 --> 00:07:46,699
RENE, YOU OF ALL PEOPLE
SHOULD KNOW THAT
197
00:07:46,699 --> 00:07:49,201
I HAVE THE PERFECT QUALITIES
YOU SAID YOU WANTED:
198
00:07:49,202 --> 00:07:51,204
BEAUTY, STRENGTH,
199
00:07:51,204 --> 00:07:52,705
VIRTUE.
200
00:07:52,705 --> 00:07:55,207
ONE OUT OF THREE IS
A START, I SUPPOSE.
201
00:07:55,208 --> 00:07:57,710
BUT YOU ARE THE EDITOR.
202
00:07:57,710 --> 00:07:58,711
SURELY YOUR DECISION
IS FINAL?
203
00:07:58,711 --> 00:08:00,713
I AM ONLY
THE EDITOR BECAUSE
204
00:08:00,713 --> 00:08:02,214
THE COLONEL FORCED
THE JOB ON ME.
205
00:08:02,215 --> 00:08:04,717
BUT IT WOULD LOOK BAD
IF I SHOWED FAVORITISM.
206
00:08:04,717 --> 00:08:06,719
IN THAT CASE, I SHALL
HAVE TO TAKE MY CHANCE
207
00:08:06,719 --> 00:08:08,220
WITH THE REST
OF THE COMPETITION--
208
00:08:08,221 --> 00:08:09,722
IF THERE IS ANY.
209
00:08:11,724 --> 00:08:12,725
AHA!
210
00:08:12,725 --> 00:08:14,226
I HAVE COME
TO BE PHOTOGRAPHED
211
00:08:14,227 --> 00:08:15,728
FOR THE SPIRIT
OF NOUVION CONTEST.
212
00:08:15,728 --> 00:08:17,730
WHAT ARE YOU DOING AWAY
FROM YOUR POST AT THE BAR?
213
00:08:17,730 --> 00:08:19,231
WELL, MIMI IS THERE.
214
00:08:19,232 --> 00:08:21,234
AND I AM HERE BECAUSE
I HAVE STRENGTH,
215
00:08:21,234 --> 00:08:22,735
VIRTUE, AND BEAUTY.
216
00:08:22,735 --> 00:08:25,738
CERTAINLY
TWO OUT OF THREE.
217
00:08:25,738 --> 00:08:27,740
I ONLY AT THE MOMENT HAVE
218
00:08:27,740 --> 00:08:29,241
ONE PHOTOGRAPH PLATE,
MADEMOISELLE.
219
00:08:29,242 --> 00:08:31,244
YVETTE, GO AND SIT
NEXT TO EDITH.
220
00:08:31,244 --> 00:08:33,246
WE WILL PHOTOGRAPH
YOU TOGETHER,
221
00:08:33,246 --> 00:08:34,747
AND CUT THE PHOTO
IN HALF.
222
00:08:36,249 --> 00:08:37,750
MIMI, WHAT ARE YOU
DOING HERE?
223
00:08:37,750 --> 00:08:39,752
I HAVE COME
TO BE PHOTOGRAPHED
224
00:08:39,752 --> 00:08:41,253
FOR THE SPIRIT
OF NOUVION CONTEST.
225
00:08:41,254 --> 00:08:43,256
HAVE I NOT
THE QUALIFICATIONS REQUIRED?
226
00:08:43,256 --> 00:08:44,757
OH, YES.
227
00:08:44,757 --> 00:08:47,259
IT'S JUST THAT THEY ARE
IN A SMALLER PACKAGE.
228
00:08:48,261 --> 00:08:49,762
WHAT IS SHE
DOING HERE?
229
00:08:49,762 --> 00:08:52,264
I THOUGHT YOU WERE
FEEDING THE CHICKENS.
230
00:08:52,265 --> 00:08:54,267
I AM HAVING MY PHOTO
TAKEN FOR THE CONTEST.
231
00:08:54,267 --> 00:08:55,768
( laughing )
DON'T BOTHER.
232
00:08:55,768 --> 00:08:57,770
I AM ENTERING
THE COMPETITION,
233
00:08:57,770 --> 00:08:59,271
SO YOU HAVE NO CHANCE.
234
00:08:59,272 --> 00:09:01,274
THE JUDGES ARE
BOUND TO PICK ME.
235
00:09:01,274 --> 00:09:03,276
ONLY IF YOU
BRIBE THEM FIRST.
236
00:09:03,276 --> 00:09:04,777
HOW DARE YOU?!
237
00:09:04,777 --> 00:09:07,279
( shrieking )
238
00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:09,282
PLEASE KEEP
YOUR GIRLS
239
00:09:09,282 --> 00:09:10,783
UNDER CONTROL,
MONSIEUR.
240
00:09:10,783 --> 00:09:12,785
STOP THAT.
STOP IT!
241
00:09:12,785 --> 00:09:14,787
WE WILL PHOTOGRAPH
YOU ALL TOGETHER,
242
00:09:14,787 --> 00:09:16,789
AND CUT IT
INTO THREE.
243
00:09:16,789 --> 00:09:18,791
NOW SIT DOWN
AND BEHAVE.
244
00:09:18,791 --> 00:09:19,792
Both:
YES, RENE.
245
00:09:21,794 --> 00:09:23,796
LET ME SEE
246
00:09:23,796 --> 00:09:25,798
THE TRUE SPIRIT
OF NOUVION.
247
00:09:31,804 --> 00:09:33,806
AFTER WHAT
I HAVE JUST SEEN,
248
00:09:33,806 --> 00:09:35,808
IT'S GOING TO MAKE
249
00:09:35,808 --> 00:09:37,810
A VERY HARD DECISION.
250
00:09:38,811 --> 00:09:41,814
I WILL GO AND GET
THIS DEVELOPED
251
00:09:41,814 --> 00:09:43,315
IN THE PRIVACY
OF MY DARKROOM,
252
00:09:45,318 --> 00:09:48,321
WHERE I ALSO KEEP
MY BLOOD PRESSURE PILLS.
253
00:09:49,822 --> 00:09:51,323
NOW, NO MORE SQUABBLING.
254
00:09:51,324 --> 00:09:53,826
ALL RIGHT, YOU TWO, GET BACK
AND LOOK AFTER THE CAFE.
255
00:09:53,826 --> 00:09:55,327
AND BE ASSURED,
256
00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:57,330
THE DECISION
OF THE EDITOR IS FINAL.
257
00:09:58,331 --> 00:09:59,832
Both:
YES, RENE.
258
00:10:02,335 --> 00:10:04,837
OH, RENE, YOU ARE SO
GOOD FOR THOSE GIRLS.
259
00:10:04,837 --> 00:10:06,839
THEY NEED
A STRICT DISCIPLINE.
260
00:10:06,839 --> 00:10:08,841
I DO MY BEST,
EDITH.
261
00:10:10,343 --> 00:10:11,344
( Rene groans )
262
00:10:11,344 --> 00:10:14,847
- GOOD MOANING.
- GOOD MOANING.
263
00:10:14,847 --> 00:10:17,850
MONSIEUR LECLOCK
SAID THAT
264
00:10:17,850 --> 00:10:19,351
I WOULD FOND
YOU HERE, RONNIE.
265
00:10:19,352 --> 00:10:21,854
I HAVE A MASSAGE
FROM MICHELLE.
266
00:10:21,854 --> 00:10:23,856
AND WHAT IS
THE MASSAGE?
267
00:10:23,856 --> 00:10:26,358
IT IS ABOOT
THE PUNTING
268
00:10:26,359 --> 00:10:28,361
OF THE FILLEN MIDINNA
WITH THE BOG BEEBIES.
269
00:10:33,866 --> 00:10:35,868
"WE WILL TUNNEL INTO--
270
00:10:35,868 --> 00:10:37,870
THE DUNGEON
OF HERR FLICK,
271
00:10:37,870 --> 00:10:40,372
FROM THE OLD DISUSED
BAKERY NEXT DOOR,
272
00:10:40,373 --> 00:10:42,875
AND STEAL THE PAINTING
FROM HIS SAFE TONIGHT."
273
00:10:42,875 --> 00:10:45,377
OH, YES, YES. I SUPPOSE
SHE THINKS THAT I KEEP
274
00:10:45,378 --> 00:10:47,380
A ROAD DRILL UNDER MY BED,
275
00:10:47,380 --> 00:10:49,382
NOT TO MENTION
A WELDING MACHINE.
276
00:10:49,382 --> 00:10:50,383
NO, SHE HAS GONE MAD!
277
00:10:50,383 --> 00:10:52,385
MONSIEUR LECLOCK
278
00:10:52,385 --> 00:10:54,887
IS AN EXPERIENCED
SOFEBRICKER.
279
00:10:54,887 --> 00:10:57,890
HE HAS ALRIDDY
AGRODE TO DEE IT,
280
00:10:57,890 --> 00:11:00,392
AND HE HAS THE TOWELS
TO DO THE JIB.
281
00:11:01,394 --> 00:11:03,396
BUT HERR FLICK AND
HERR VON SMALLHAUSEN
282
00:11:03,396 --> 00:11:04,897
WILL BE IN
THE DUNGEON TONIGHT.
283
00:11:04,897 --> 00:11:06,398
YOU MUST
GET THEM OUT.
284
00:11:06,399 --> 00:11:07,400
HOW?
285
00:11:07,400 --> 00:11:09,902
YOU MUST TELEPHONE
THEM, ANINYMOUSLY,
286
00:11:09,902 --> 00:11:12,404
AND SAY THAT
A SECRET MASSAGE
287
00:11:12,405 --> 00:11:14,907
WILL BE PISSED IN
YOUR CAFE TONIGHT.
288
00:11:17,910 --> 00:11:20,412
THE MASSAGE
WILL BE FILSE,
289
00:11:20,413 --> 00:11:22,415
BUT IT WILL
LEAR THEM AWAY
290
00:11:22,415 --> 00:11:23,416
FROM THEIR DINGEON.
291
00:11:23,416 --> 00:11:25,918
OH, SHE HAS THOUGHT
OF EVERYTHING.
292
00:11:25,918 --> 00:11:27,419
HOW COMFORTING.
293
00:11:29,922 --> 00:11:31,924
MICHELLE WILL
RANDYVOUS WITH YOU
294
00:11:31,924 --> 00:11:33,425
IN THE SQUARE,
295
00:11:33,426 --> 00:11:36,429
AT HALF-PISSED TIN.
296
00:11:36,429 --> 00:11:39,432
I DO NOT RECALL HAVING
A RANDYVOUS IN THE SQUARE--
297
00:11:40,433 --> 00:11:43,436
SINCE I WAS
A BACHELOR.
298
00:11:45,071 --> 00:11:47,073
( sucks in air )
TSK, TSK, TSK,
299
00:11:48,074 --> 00:11:50,576
YOU MAKE THAT MOVE,
HE TAKE YOUR PAWN.
300
00:11:50,576 --> 00:11:52,077
BE QUIET,
301
00:11:52,078 --> 00:11:54,080
IT'S ALL PART
OF MY GAME PLAN.
302
00:11:58,084 --> 00:11:59,085
CHECKMATE.
303
00:12:00,086 --> 00:12:02,088
THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
304
00:12:02,088 --> 00:12:04,090
I WITHDRAW MY MOVE.
305
00:12:05,091 --> 00:12:07,093
ANY COMPLAINT
WILL BE REGARDED
306
00:12:07,093 --> 00:12:08,594
AS UNSPORTING.
307
00:12:08,594 --> 00:12:10,095
I WITHDRAW.
308
00:12:10,096 --> 00:12:12,598
I WAS BEING
TOO HASTY.
309
00:12:15,601 --> 00:12:17,102
OH, DEAR,
I'M SORRY, COLONEL.
310
00:12:17,103 --> 00:12:19,105
I SEEM TO HAVE
CHECKMATED YOU AGAIN.
311
00:12:20,606 --> 00:12:22,608
IN THAT CASE,
312
00:12:25,611 --> 00:12:28,113
YOU HAVE A TRICKY
PROBLEM TO SOLVE.
313
00:12:29,115 --> 00:12:30,116
COLONEL,
314
00:12:30,116 --> 00:12:31,617
I HAVE SOME
INTELLIGENCE,
315
00:12:31,617 --> 00:12:33,619
WHICH YOU MAY FIND
MOST INTERESTING.
316
00:12:33,619 --> 00:12:35,120
WHAT IS THIS
INTELLIGENCE, HELGA?
317
00:12:35,121 --> 00:12:37,123
HERR FLICK HAS SOMEHOW
OBTAINED THE PAINTING
318
00:12:37,123 --> 00:12:39,125
OF THE FALLEN MADONNA
WITH THE BIG BOOBIES.
319
00:12:39,125 --> 00:12:40,626
IT IS IN HIS SAFE.
320
00:12:40,626 --> 00:12:42,127
BUT, HELGA,
321
00:12:42,128 --> 00:12:45,131
YOU DO STILL HAVE
THE KEY TO HIS DUNGEON?
322
00:12:45,131 --> 00:12:47,133
IN A FIT OF PIQUE,
I GAVE IT BACK.
323
00:12:47,133 --> 00:12:49,635
HELGA! YOU SHOULD
HAVE MADE A COPY.
324
00:12:49,635 --> 00:12:53,138
HOW CAN WE GET IN
TO STEAL THE PAINTING?
325
00:12:53,139 --> 00:12:55,641
COULD YOU NOT
DISGUISE YOURSELVES
326
00:12:55,641 --> 00:12:58,644
AS RESISTANCE DESPERADOS
AND BLOW DOWN THE DOOR?
327
00:12:58,644 --> 00:13:01,146
BUT HERR FLICK AND
HIS LITTLE PYGMY FRIEND,
328
00:13:01,147 --> 00:13:02,648
THEY INSIDE.
329
00:13:02,648 --> 00:13:04,149
ALL THE BETTER.
330
00:13:04,150 --> 00:13:06,152
YOU STICK THEM UP
WITH GUNS,
331
00:13:06,152 --> 00:13:08,154
AND MAKE THEM
OPEN THE SAFE.
332
00:13:08,154 --> 00:13:10,656
YOU GET THE PAINTING,
THE RESISTANCE GETS THE BLAME.
333
00:13:10,656 --> 00:13:12,658
WELL, IT DOES HAVE
334
00:13:12,658 --> 00:13:14,660
A CERTAIN
CRUDE SIMPLICITY,
335
00:13:14,660 --> 00:13:16,161
BUT I REALLY DON'T THINK
336
00:13:16,162 --> 00:13:18,664
I FANCY THE ROLE
OF DESPERADO.
337
00:13:18,664 --> 00:13:20,666
WE CAN USE
BERTORELLI'S MEN.
338
00:13:20,666 --> 00:13:23,168
DO I GET A CUT WHEN
WE SELL THE PAINTING?
339
00:13:23,169 --> 00:13:24,670
WE GIVE YOU
OUR WORD.
340
00:13:24,670 --> 00:13:26,672
OKEY-DOKEY.
BUT I TELL THEM
341
00:13:26,672 --> 00:13:28,173
IT'S A TRAINING EXERCISE,
342
00:13:28,174 --> 00:13:29,675
OR THEY WANT
A CUT OF THE ACTION.
343
00:13:29,675 --> 00:13:31,677
VERY WELL,
WE'LL DO IT TONIGHT
344
00:13:31,677 --> 00:13:32,678
AT MIDNIGHT.
345
00:13:33,679 --> 00:13:35,180
( phone rings )
346
00:13:35,181 --> 00:13:37,183
GOOD AFTERNOON,
347
00:13:37,183 --> 00:13:39,185
GESTAPO
SECRET HEADQUARTERS,
348
00:13:39,185 --> 00:13:40,686
CAN I HELP YOU?
349
00:13:40,686 --> 00:13:42,688
( disguising voice )
THIS IS A FRIEND.
350
00:13:42,688 --> 00:13:44,690
GIVE ME HERR FLICK,
PLEASE.
351
00:13:44,690 --> 00:13:46,692
WE HAVE A FRIEND,
HERR FLICK.
352
00:13:47,693 --> 00:13:48,694
OUR FIRST!
353
00:13:48,694 --> 00:13:51,196
PERHAPS YOU'D LIKE TO COME
ROUND FOR TEA ONE AFTERNOON?
354
00:13:52,198 --> 00:13:54,700
THIS IS THE GESTAPO,
VON SMALLHAUSEN,
355
00:13:54,700 --> 00:13:56,702
NOT THE WOMEN'S INSTITUTE.
356
00:13:56,702 --> 00:13:58,203
THIS IS HERR FLICK.
357
00:13:58,204 --> 00:14:00,706
IF YOU GO TO CAFE RENE
358
00:14:00,706 --> 00:14:03,208
TONIGHT
AT JUST BEFORE 10:00,
359
00:14:03,209 --> 00:14:06,212
YOU MIGHT SEE A SECRET
MESSAGE BEING PASSED,
360
00:14:06,212 --> 00:14:08,714
WHICH COULD BE
OF INTEREST TO YOU.
361
00:14:08,714 --> 00:14:10,716
AND WHAT IS THIS MESSAGE?
362
00:14:10,716 --> 00:14:11,717
( phone clicks )
363
00:14:11,717 --> 00:14:13,218
HE HAS RUNG OFF.
364
00:14:13,219 --> 00:14:14,720
WHAT DID HE SAY?
365
00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:16,722
WE MUST GO TO THE CAFE RENE
THIS EVENING,
366
00:14:16,722 --> 00:14:18,724
TO INTERCEPT
A SECRET MESSAGE.
367
00:14:18,724 --> 00:14:20,225
THIS COULD PUT US BACK
368
00:14:20,226 --> 00:14:22,228
IN UNCLE HEINIE'S
GOOD BOOKS.
369
00:14:22,228 --> 00:14:24,730
BUT SURELY THEY WOULD NOT
PASS A MESSAGE IF THEY SEE
370
00:14:24,730 --> 00:14:27,232
TWO SINISTER FIGURES
LIKE US, HERR FLICK.
371
00:14:27,233 --> 00:14:30,236
FIGURES THAT STRIKE TERROR
372
00:14:30,236 --> 00:14:32,238
INTO THE EYES OF ALL
THAT BEHOLD THEM,
373
00:14:32,238 --> 00:14:34,740
AS THEY LIMP
THROUGH THE MISTS
374
00:14:34,740 --> 00:14:37,743
OF THE NARROW
COBBLED STREETS OF NOUVION,
375
00:14:37,743 --> 00:14:41,246
TO KEEP THEIR DATE
WITH DESTINY.
376
00:14:43,249 --> 00:14:45,751
DO NOT LET THAT
PETER LORRE FILM WE SAW LAST NIGHT
377
00:14:45,751 --> 00:14:47,753
COMPLETELY DOMINATE
YOUR MIND, VON SMALLHAUSEN.
378
00:14:47,753 --> 00:14:48,754
I'M SORRY,
HERR FLICK.
379
00:14:48,754 --> 00:14:50,756
WE WILL GO IN DISGUISE.
380
00:14:50,756 --> 00:14:51,757
I SHALL GO
381
00:14:51,757 --> 00:14:53,759
AS A DEBONAIR
MAN ABOUT TOWN.
382
00:14:53,759 --> 00:14:55,761
YOU WILL GO
AS MY LADY COMPANION.
383
00:14:55,761 --> 00:14:59,264
BUT I-- I HAVE
NOTHING TO WEAR.
384
00:14:59,265 --> 00:15:01,767
THERE IS, IN THE GESTAPO
DISGUISE CUPBOARD,
385
00:15:01,767 --> 00:15:03,268
A VERY PRETTY
PINK FROCK.
386
00:15:03,269 --> 00:15:06,772
YOU WILL ALSO FIND
A BOX OF ACCESSORIES.
387
00:15:06,772 --> 00:15:08,774
WILL WE BE
ON OUR FIRST DATE,
388
00:15:08,774 --> 00:15:10,776
OR ARE WE GOING STEADY?
389
00:15:10,776 --> 00:15:12,778
WHAT HAS THAT
GOT TO DO WITH IT?
390
00:15:12,778 --> 00:15:14,780
WELL, IT WILL INFLUENCE
391
00:15:14,780 --> 00:15:16,782
MY CHOICE OF UNDERGARMENT.
392
00:15:16,782 --> 00:15:19,284
DO NOT MENTION UNDERGARMENTS,
VON SMALLHAUSEN.
393
00:15:19,285 --> 00:15:21,287
IT REMINDS ME TOO MUCH
OF THE FRUIT
394
00:15:21,287 --> 00:15:23,289
MY UNCLE HEINIE HAS
FORBIDDEN ME TO PICK.
395
00:15:23,289 --> 00:15:24,790
I'M SORRY, HERR FLICK.
396
00:15:24,790 --> 00:15:27,292
GO AND TITIVATE YOURSELF
IMMEDIATELY.
397
00:15:27,293 --> 00:15:29,295
AND MAKE SURE
YOU SHAVE YOUR LEGS.
398
00:15:29,295 --> 00:15:30,796
IS THAT NECESSARY?
399
00:15:30,796 --> 00:15:32,798
SENIOR GESTAPO OFFICERS
400
00:15:32,798 --> 00:15:34,299
DO NOT GO OUT ON THE TOWN
401
00:15:34,300 --> 00:15:36,802
WITH HAIRY-LEGGED MIDGETS.
402
00:15:40,806 --> 00:15:43,809
IS IT TRUE BLONDES
HAVE MORE FUN?
403
00:15:43,809 --> 00:15:44,810
YES,
404
00:15:44,810 --> 00:15:46,311
BUT NOT IN YOUR CASE.
405
00:15:48,314 --> 00:15:50,416
♪ ...AND LOVE ♪
406
00:15:50,416 --> 00:15:52,418
♪ FELL OUT ♪
407
00:15:52,418 --> 00:15:55,421
♪ WITH ME-EEE. ♪
408
00:15:55,421 --> 00:15:56,922
PEASANTS!
409
00:16:02,428 --> 00:16:05,431
GOOD EVENING, MONSIEUR.
GOOD EVENING, MADAME.
410
00:16:05,431 --> 00:16:06,432
GOOD EVENING.
411
00:16:06,432 --> 00:16:07,933
( falsetto )
GOOD EVENING.
412
00:16:07,933 --> 00:16:10,435
I'M AFRAID YOU HAVE
JUST MISSED THE SINGING.
413
00:16:10,436 --> 00:16:11,937
WE ARE
MUSIC LOVERS,
414
00:16:11,937 --> 00:16:13,939
SO THAT
IS GOOD NEWS.
415
00:16:13,939 --> 00:16:14,940
BRING ME
THE WINE LIST.
416
00:16:14,940 --> 00:16:16,441
OF COURSE, MONSIEUR.
417
00:16:16,442 --> 00:16:19,445
RENE, IT IS HERR FLICK
AND HERR VON SMALLHAUSEN
418
00:16:19,445 --> 00:16:21,447
IN DISGUISE,
AT THAT TABLE THERE.
419
00:16:21,447 --> 00:16:22,948
THE PLAN
IS WORKING.
420
00:16:22,948 --> 00:16:24,449
JUST ACT NORMALLY.
421
00:16:24,450 --> 00:16:26,452
GET TO THE DOOR;
GIVE MONSIEUR LECLERC THE SIGNAL.
422
00:16:26,452 --> 00:16:27,453
YES.
423
00:16:28,454 --> 00:16:30,456
I WILL JUST SEE
IF IT IS RAINING.
424
00:16:33,959 --> 00:16:35,961
IT IS NOT RAINING.
425
00:16:36,962 --> 00:16:38,964
THE WINE LIST,
MONSIEUR.
426
00:16:39,965 --> 00:16:42,467
SHALL WE ORDER
CHAMPAGNE?
427
00:16:42,468 --> 00:16:43,469
CERTAINLY NOT!
428
00:16:43,469 --> 00:16:46,472
I DO NOT BUY CHAMPAGNE
FOR UGLY GIRLS LIKE YOU.
429
00:16:48,474 --> 00:16:50,476
BUT OTTO, DARLING,
430
00:16:50,476 --> 00:16:52,978
SURELY WE COULD SPLASH OUT
ON A BOTTLE OF BUBBLY?
431
00:16:52,978 --> 00:16:55,981
DO NOT PUSH YOUR LUCK,
VON SMALLHAUSEN.
432
00:16:55,981 --> 00:16:58,483
RENE, DO YOU
THINK IT WILL WORK?
433
00:16:58,484 --> 00:17:00,486
PROVIDED MONSIEUR
LECLERC HAS NOT
434
00:17:00,486 --> 00:17:01,987
GONE TO SLEEP
IN A DOORWAY--
435
00:17:01,987 --> 00:17:03,488
HE HAS BEEN
OUT THERE AN HOUR.
436
00:17:03,489 --> 00:17:05,991
I DO HOPE HE LOOKS
SUSPICIOUS ENOUGH.
437
00:17:09,495 --> 00:17:11,497
YOU CANNOT LOOK
MUCH MORE SUSPICIOUS THAN THAT.
438
00:17:11,497 --> 00:17:14,500
MATCHES, LOVELY MATCHES.
439
00:17:14,500 --> 00:17:16,502
WHO WILL BUY SOME MATCHES
440
00:17:16,502 --> 00:17:18,504
FROM A POOR OLD
MATCH SELLER?
441
00:17:18,504 --> 00:17:20,506
COME OVER HERE WITH ME,
BY THE BAR,
442
00:17:20,506 --> 00:17:22,007
POOR OLD MATCH SELLER,
443
00:17:22,007 --> 00:17:23,508
WHOM I DO NOT KNOW.
444
00:17:23,509 --> 00:17:26,011
I THINK YOU MIGHT HAVE
SOMETHING FOR ME.
445
00:17:26,011 --> 00:17:28,013
THERE IS A DIFFERENCE
BETWEEN BEING SUSPICIOUS
446
00:17:28,013 --> 00:17:30,515
AND BEING DERANGED,
YOU SILLY OLD FOOL.
447
00:17:30,516 --> 00:17:32,518
THEY HAVE NOT
NOTICED.
448
00:17:32,518 --> 00:17:34,019
GOD KNOWS HOW
THEY CAN HAVE MISSED YOU.
449
00:17:34,019 --> 00:17:35,520
GO OUT
AND DO IT AGAIN.
450
00:17:35,521 --> 00:17:38,023
I GO. I COME BACK.
451
00:17:38,023 --> 00:17:41,026
ARE YOU KEEPING
YOUR EYES SKINNED?
452
00:17:41,026 --> 00:17:43,028
YES, BUT I CANNOT FIND
453
00:17:43,028 --> 00:17:45,030
ANY CHATEAU-BOTTLED WINES.
454
00:17:45,030 --> 00:17:46,531
FORGET
THE WINE LIST.
455
00:17:46,532 --> 00:17:48,534
WE ARE LOOKING
FOR SOMETHING SUSPICIOUS.
456
00:17:48,534 --> 00:17:50,536
VERY WELL, HERR FLICK.
457
00:17:50,536 --> 00:17:52,538
AND STOP EYEING UP
THE MEN
458
00:17:52,538 --> 00:17:54,039
AT THE NEXT TABLE,
459
00:17:54,039 --> 00:17:55,540
AND COVER
YOURSELF UP,
460
00:17:55,541 --> 00:17:57,042
YOU ARE SHOWING
TOO MUCH LEG.
461
00:17:57,042 --> 00:17:59,044
I WILL NOT BE
TWO-TIMED
462
00:17:59,044 --> 00:18:01,546
BY AN OVER
TITIVATED TART.
463
00:18:01,547 --> 00:18:03,549
I'M SORRY, DARLING.
464
00:18:03,549 --> 00:18:05,050
AND DO NOT CALL ME "DARLING."
465
00:18:05,050 --> 00:18:07,052
BUT HE KEEPS WINKING AT ME.
466
00:18:07,052 --> 00:18:09,054
HE'S OBVIOUSLY DRUNK.
IGNORE HIM.
467
00:18:10,055 --> 00:18:11,556
HAVE YOU CHOSEN YET,
MONSIEUR?
468
00:18:11,557 --> 00:18:13,559
YES, I WILL
HAVE A GLASS
469
00:18:13,559 --> 00:18:16,061
OF YOUR FINEST
COGNAC.
470
00:18:16,061 --> 00:18:18,563
AND FOR THIS REMARKABLE
LOOKING LADY?
471
00:18:18,564 --> 00:18:20,566
SHE WILL
HAVE A GLASS
472
00:18:20,566 --> 00:18:22,568
OF YOUR MOST
INFERIOR WINE.
473
00:18:23,569 --> 00:18:26,071
MATCHES!
474
00:18:26,071 --> 00:18:28,073
WHO WILL BUY MY MATCHES?
475
00:18:28,073 --> 00:18:30,075
LOOK, AN OLD
MATCH SELLER.
476
00:18:30,075 --> 00:18:31,576
AND A STRANGER
TO ME.
477
00:18:31,577 --> 00:18:33,078
I WONDER WHAT
HE WANTS HERE?
478
00:18:33,078 --> 00:18:34,079
Mamma:
ERNEST?
479
00:18:34,079 --> 00:18:36,581
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
480
00:18:36,582 --> 00:18:39,084
I HAVE BEEN
WAITING UPSTAIRS
481
00:18:39,084 --> 00:18:40,585
FOR HOURS.
482
00:18:40,586 --> 00:18:42,588
ARE YOU NOT
COMING UP?
483
00:18:42,588 --> 00:18:44,590
I AM JUST PASSING
484
00:18:44,590 --> 00:18:46,592
THIS SECRET MESSAGE,
FANNY.
485
00:18:46,592 --> 00:18:48,093
WHAT WAS THAT?
486
00:18:48,093 --> 00:18:50,595
( louder )
I AM JUST PASSING THIS SECRET MESSAGE.
487
00:18:50,596 --> 00:18:52,598
A SECRET MESSAGE?
488
00:18:52,598 --> 00:18:54,600
WHAT SECRET MESSAGE?
489
00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:57,102
GET BACK TO BED,
YOU SILLY OLD BAT.
490
00:18:57,102 --> 00:18:59,604
YOU CAN GET KNOTTED.
491
00:19:01,607 --> 00:19:03,609
AHEM.
492
00:19:03,609 --> 00:19:06,111
I HAVE BROUGHT YOU
THIS MESSAGE, MONSIEUR.
493
00:19:06,111 --> 00:19:07,112
STOP!
494
00:19:08,113 --> 00:19:09,614
I WILL TAKE
THIS MESSAGE.
495
00:19:09,615 --> 00:19:11,617
FOR I AM
NONE OTHER THAN
496
00:19:11,617 --> 00:19:13,619
HERR FLICK
OF THE GESTAPO.
497
00:19:14,620 --> 00:19:16,622
NO! WHAT A SURPRISE.
498
00:19:16,622 --> 00:19:19,124
- ( scream in unison )
- ( glass breaks )
499
00:19:19,124 --> 00:19:21,126
MY MASTERLY
500
00:19:21,126 --> 00:19:22,627
USE OF DISGUISE
501
00:19:22,628 --> 00:19:24,129
HAS FOOLED
YOU ALL.
502
00:19:24,129 --> 00:19:26,131
READ THE MESSAGE,
VON SMALLHAUSEN.
503
00:19:28,133 --> 00:19:30,635
"THE TWO BIRDS
YOU ARE LOOKING FOR
504
00:19:30,636 --> 00:19:33,138
WILL BE IN
THE HOLLOW TREE,
505
00:19:33,138 --> 00:19:35,140
20 PACES
ALONG THE RIVER
506
00:19:35,140 --> 00:19:37,642
FROM THE OLD BRIDGE,
AND 40 PACES
507
00:19:37,643 --> 00:19:40,145
INTO THE WOODS
AT MIDNIGHT."
508
00:19:40,145 --> 00:19:42,147
HMM, "THE TWO BIRDS,"
509
00:19:42,147 --> 00:19:44,649
BIRDS FLY,
AND SO DO AIRMEN.
510
00:19:44,650 --> 00:19:46,151
AHA!
511
00:19:46,151 --> 00:19:49,154
THE BRITISH AIRMEN
ARE HIDDEN IN THE TREE.
512
00:19:49,154 --> 00:19:51,656
WE WILL GO THERE AT MIDNIGHT
AND APPREHEND THEM.
513
00:19:51,657 --> 00:19:54,660
NOBODY IS TO
LEAVE THE CAFE
514
00:19:54,660 --> 00:19:55,661
OR GO TO
THE WOODS,
515
00:19:55,661 --> 00:19:58,163
OR THERE WILL BE
SEVERE PENALTIES.
516
00:20:00,165 --> 00:20:01,666
HERR VON SMALLHAUSEN?
517
00:20:01,667 --> 00:20:03,669
YOU FORGOT YOUR HANDBAG.
518
00:20:06,171 --> 00:20:07,172
AND YOUR SEAMS
ARE CROOKED.
519
00:20:09,174 --> 00:20:11,176
OH, RENE, IT WORKED.
520
00:20:11,176 --> 00:20:13,178
THEY WILL BE OUT
OF THE DUNGEON
521
00:20:13,178 --> 00:20:14,679
WHEN WE BREAK IN TONIGHT.
522
00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:16,682
GO AND GET
YOUR SAFEBREAKING EQUIPMENT,
523
00:20:16,682 --> 00:20:19,685
WE WILL SET OFF
FOR THE BAKERY VERY SHORTLY.
524
00:20:19,685 --> 00:20:21,186
- ERNEST?
- HEH?
525
00:20:21,186 --> 00:20:23,188
ARE YOU NOT
COMING UP TO BED,
526
00:20:23,188 --> 00:20:25,190
MY LOVE?
527
00:20:25,190 --> 00:20:27,192
I FEEL RATHER...
528
00:20:27,192 --> 00:20:28,693
PLAYFUL.
529
00:20:29,695 --> 00:20:31,196
FIRST,
I MUST GET MY DRILL
530
00:20:31,196 --> 00:20:32,697
AND DYNAMITE, FANNY.
531
00:20:36,201 --> 00:20:37,702
AH, WELL,
532
00:20:37,703 --> 00:20:39,204
ON SECOND THOUGHTS,
533
00:20:39,204 --> 00:20:41,706
I THINK I WILL HAVE
AN EARLY NIGHT.
534
00:20:51,216 --> 00:20:54,219
THIS MUST BE THE TREE,
HERR FLICK.
535
00:20:54,219 --> 00:20:55,720
SHINE
YOUR TORCH IN IT,
536
00:20:55,721 --> 00:20:58,223
AND SEE IF
THE BRITISH AIRMEN ARE IN THERE.
537
00:21:06,732 --> 00:21:09,735
THERE ARE JUST
THESE TWO PHEASANTS, HERR FLICK.
538
00:21:09,735 --> 00:21:11,737
THERE IS A NOTE ON THEM.
WHAT DOES IT SAY?
539
00:21:11,737 --> 00:21:14,239
"DEAR RENE,
540
00:21:14,239 --> 00:21:17,742
THESE ARE THE TWO BIRDS
541
00:21:17,743 --> 00:21:19,745
TO PUT ON YOUR MENU.
542
00:21:19,745 --> 00:21:21,747
SIGNED,
543
00:21:21,747 --> 00:21:23,749
A. POACHER."
544
00:21:23,749 --> 00:21:25,250
WE HAVE BEEN LED
545
00:21:25,250 --> 00:21:27,752
ON A WILD GOOSE CHASE,
VON SMALLHAUSEN.
546
00:21:27,753 --> 00:21:28,754
( animal squeaks )
547
00:21:28,754 --> 00:21:30,255
WHAT WAS THAT?
548
00:21:30,255 --> 00:21:31,756
( squeak )
549
00:21:32,758 --> 00:21:34,259
( squeak )
550
00:21:37,262 --> 00:21:40,265
I HAVE BEEN STRUCK
BY A HAZELNUT.
551
00:21:40,265 --> 00:21:42,267
( squeaking )
552
00:21:42,267 --> 00:21:45,270
WHAT IMPUDENCE!
WE ARE THE GESTAPO!
553
00:21:45,270 --> 00:21:47,272
( machine gun firing )
554
00:21:53,945 --> 00:21:55,446
WELL?
555
00:21:55,447 --> 00:21:56,948
WE HAVE COME UP
556
00:21:56,948 --> 00:21:57,949
UNDER THE SAFE
OF HERR FLICK.
557
00:21:57,949 --> 00:21:59,450
WE HAVE TO CUT AWAY
AT THE METAL NOW.
558
00:21:59,451 --> 00:22:00,952
THAT IS MONSIEUR
LECLERC'S JOB.
559
00:22:00,952 --> 00:22:02,453
I AM READY.
560
00:22:02,454 --> 00:22:03,955
IS THE COAST
STILL CLEAR?
561
00:22:03,955 --> 00:22:05,957
OFFICER CRABTREE IS
STANDING BY IN THE SQUARE.
562
00:22:05,957 --> 00:22:07,959
IF ANYONE COMES,
HE WILL LET US KNOW.
563
00:22:14,466 --> 00:22:17,469
REMIND ME NEVER TO GO
SAFEBREAKING WITH YOU AGAIN.
564
00:22:24,476 --> 00:22:26,478
THAT SHOULD
JUST BE ENOUGH
565
00:22:26,478 --> 00:22:27,979
EXPLOSIVE
TO BLOW UP THE DOOR.
566
00:22:29,981 --> 00:22:31,482
GOOD MOANING.
567
00:22:32,984 --> 00:22:34,986
WIT ARE YOU DEEING
568
00:22:34,986 --> 00:22:36,487
LITTERING OUTSOD
569
00:22:36,488 --> 00:22:37,989
THE SECRET HEADQUITTERS
570
00:22:37,989 --> 00:22:39,490
OF HERR FLOCK
OF THE GESTOOPOO
571
00:22:39,491 --> 00:22:41,493
AT THIS TOME OF NIT?
572
00:22:41,493 --> 00:22:43,495
Gruber:
WE WERE JUST--
573
00:22:43,495 --> 00:22:45,497
TAKING THE NIGHT AIR,
OFFICER.
574
00:22:45,497 --> 00:22:47,499
YOU MIST ACCIMPANY ME
575
00:22:47,499 --> 00:22:49,501
TO THE POLOOSE STOTION.
576
00:22:49,501 --> 00:22:51,002
WHATEVER FOR?
577
00:22:51,002 --> 00:22:54,005
I SUSPECT YOU ARE
COMMITTING A BIGLERY.
578
00:22:56,007 --> 00:22:58,009
AND WHAT IF
WE DON'T WANT TO GO?
579
00:22:58,009 --> 00:23:00,011
THEN I SHALL HOV
580
00:23:00,011 --> 00:23:02,013
TO USE FIERCE.
581
00:23:02,013 --> 00:23:04,015
I AM OUTNIMBERED,
582
00:23:04,015 --> 00:23:06,017
BUT I AM A BOG MIN,
583
00:23:06,017 --> 00:23:08,019
AND I CAN TIK YOU
584
00:23:08,019 --> 00:23:10,021
ON ANY DEE OF THE WICK.
585
00:23:10,021 --> 00:23:11,522
( whistles )
586
00:23:22,534 --> 00:23:25,036
MY MEN, THEY GOT
NO RESPECT FOR THE FUZZ.
587
00:23:25,036 --> 00:23:26,537
OKAY,
588
00:23:26,538 --> 00:23:28,039
I LIGHT THE FUSE.
589
00:23:37,048 --> 00:23:39,050
THIS BETTER BE RIGHT,
BERTORELLI.
590
00:23:39,050 --> 00:23:41,552
YOU WILL HARDLY
NOTICE ANYTHING, COLONEL.
591
00:23:48,560 --> 00:23:50,562
I THINK MAYBE
I OVERDO
592
00:23:50,562 --> 00:23:52,564
THE DYNAMITE.
593
00:23:57,068 --> 00:23:58,069
HANDS UP!
594
00:23:59,070 --> 00:24:00,571
THERE'S NO ONE HERE.
595
00:24:00,572 --> 00:24:03,074
WITHOUT HERR FLICK
AND VON SMALLHAUSEN,
596
00:24:03,074 --> 00:24:04,575
HOW ARE WE GOING
TO OPEN THE SAFE?
597
00:24:04,576 --> 00:24:07,579
MAYBE ONE OF MY MEN
KNOWS HOW TO DO IT.
598
00:24:07,579 --> 00:24:09,080
SAFEBREAKING
599
00:24:09,080 --> 00:24:11,082
IS A VERY COMPLICATED
BUSINESS, CAPTAIN.
600
00:24:11,082 --> 00:24:12,583
THAT LOT WON'T
HAVE A CLUE.
601
00:24:12,584 --> 00:24:14,085
STEP FORWARD,
602
00:24:14,085 --> 00:24:15,586
ANYONE WHO KNOWS
HOW TO CRACK THE SAFE.
603
00:24:19,591 --> 00:24:21,092
THAT'S MY BOYS.
604
00:24:21,092 --> 00:24:22,593
EVERYONE HAS
DONE THE PORRIDGE.
605
00:24:23,595 --> 00:24:25,096
OKAY, I TAKE YOU.
606
00:24:25,096 --> 00:24:26,597
THE REST OF YOU,
WAIT OUTSIDE.
607
00:24:26,598 --> 00:24:28,600
- ( men groan )
- I SAID OUTSIDE!
608
00:24:28,600 --> 00:24:30,101
YOU KEEP WATCH
FOR THE SNOOPERS.
609
00:24:31,603 --> 00:24:33,605
GRUBER, LOOK.
610
00:24:33,605 --> 00:24:35,607
HERR FLICK
HAS A LEAGUE TABLE
611
00:24:35,607 --> 00:24:38,610
OF ALL THE RESISTANCE
SUSPECTS IN THE AREA.
612
00:24:38,610 --> 00:24:41,613
LOOK, HERE IS RENE.
613
00:24:41,613 --> 00:24:44,115
HOW HANDSOME
HE LOOKS.
614
00:24:44,115 --> 00:24:48,119
BUT WHY ARE THERE
TWO PHOTOGRAPHS OF HIM?
615
00:24:48,119 --> 00:24:51,622
Colonel:
I THINK THAT'S HIS LATE TWIN BROTHER.
616
00:24:51,623 --> 00:24:53,625
THE ONE YOU SHOT.
617
00:24:53,625 --> 00:24:55,627
PLEASE, COLONEL,
DO NOT REMIND ME.
618
00:24:55,627 --> 00:24:59,130
THE VISION OF HIM
HAUNTS ME STILL.
619
00:24:59,130 --> 00:25:00,631
ACCORDING TO THIS CHART,
620
00:25:00,632 --> 00:25:03,134
RENE IS HIGH UP
ON THE LIST OF SUSPECTS.
621
00:25:03,134 --> 00:25:05,636
THAT IS BECAUSE
HE IS VERY POPULAR.
622
00:25:05,637 --> 00:25:07,138
IF I WAS HERR FLICK,
623
00:25:07,138 --> 00:25:09,140
HE'D BE NUMBER ONE.
624
00:25:13,144 --> 00:25:15,146
I HAVE CUT THROUGH
THE BOTTOM OF THE SAFE.
625
00:25:15,146 --> 00:25:16,647
WHERE IS
THE PAINTING?
626
00:25:16,648 --> 00:25:18,650
IT IS INSIDE,
ON A SHELF.
627
00:25:18,650 --> 00:25:21,152
SOME SAFEBREAKER.
628
00:25:21,152 --> 00:25:23,154
MIND OUT, I WILL GET IT.
629
00:25:26,157 --> 00:25:29,160
COME ON, BABY,
OPEN FOR ALVARO.
630
00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:31,662
( lock clicks )
631
00:25:31,663 --> 00:25:33,665
IT'S DONE.
632
00:25:33,665 --> 00:25:34,666
RIGHT, YOU WAIT
OUTSIDE NOW.
633
00:25:46,177 --> 00:25:48,179
LIEUTENANT GRUBER!
634
00:25:49,180 --> 00:25:50,181
AARGHH!
635
00:25:52,684 --> 00:25:54,185
WHAT'S THE MATTER,
GRUBER?
636
00:25:56,187 --> 00:25:57,688
IN THERE--
637
00:25:57,689 --> 00:25:59,691
THE DISEMBODIED HEAD
638
00:25:59,691 --> 00:26:02,193
OF RENE'S TWIN BROTHER!
639
00:26:02,193 --> 00:26:05,196
ALL WHITE AND GHOSTLY.
640
00:26:06,197 --> 00:26:08,699
AND HE SPOKE MY NAME.
641
00:26:08,700 --> 00:26:11,202
Rene:
I AM STUCK. PULL ME OUT.
642
00:26:11,202 --> 00:26:12,703
WHAT'S THE MATTER,
GRUBER?
643
00:26:12,704 --> 00:26:14,706
WHERE'S THE PAINTING?
644
00:26:14,706 --> 00:26:16,708
NO PAINTING.
645
00:26:16,708 --> 00:26:19,210
JUST THAT
HORRIBLE HEAD.
646
00:26:19,210 --> 00:26:21,212
OH, WILL THIS
RESTLESS SPIRIT
647
00:26:21,212 --> 00:26:22,713
NEVER LEAVE ME
IN PEACE?
648
00:26:22,714 --> 00:26:24,716
AARGHH!
649
00:26:25,717 --> 00:26:27,719
WHAT RUBBISH.
650
00:26:31,222 --> 00:26:32,723
( gasps )
651
00:26:32,724 --> 00:26:34,726
OH, COLONEL
VON STROHM,
652
00:26:34,726 --> 00:26:36,227
I CAN EXPLAIN--
653
00:26:39,230 --> 00:26:41,232
HE SPOKE MY NAME.
654
00:26:41,232 --> 00:26:43,234
DID HE MENTION MY NAME?
655
00:26:43,234 --> 00:26:45,236
NOT YET.
656
00:26:45,236 --> 00:26:47,238
OH, THANK GOD!
MAMMA MIA.
657
00:26:47,238 --> 00:26:48,739
AHHH!
WAIT FOR ME.
658
00:26:49,741 --> 00:26:51,242
WE ARE DONE FOR.
659
00:26:51,242 --> 00:26:53,244
THE GERMANS ARE
ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WALL.
660
00:26:53,244 --> 00:26:54,245
WHAT?!
661
00:26:54,245 --> 00:26:56,247
LIEUTENANT GRUBER
OPENED THE DOOR,
662
00:26:56,247 --> 00:26:58,249
AND THE COLONEL--
THEY BOTH SAW ME.
663
00:26:58,249 --> 00:27:00,251
OOOH! WHAT ARE
WE GOING TO DO?
664
00:27:00,251 --> 00:27:02,253
WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?
665
00:27:02,253 --> 00:27:04,255
IF I AM CAUGHT,
666
00:27:04,255 --> 00:27:05,756
I SHALL SAY IT WAS
ALL YOUR IDEA.
667
00:27:05,757 --> 00:27:08,259
I THINK I SHOULD TELL YOU
THAT YOU HAVE JUST
668
00:27:08,259 --> 00:27:10,261
LESSENED YOUR CHANCES
OF WINNING
669
00:27:10,261 --> 00:27:12,263
THE SPIRIT OF NOUVION
COMPETITION.
670
00:27:12,263 --> 00:27:14,265
WE HAVE WHAT WE CAME FOR.
GIVE ME THE PAINTING.
671
00:27:14,265 --> 00:27:16,767
NO, IT WILL BE SAFE
DOWN MY TROUSERS.
672
00:27:16,768 --> 00:27:18,770
THERE ARE GERMANS EVERYWHERE.
WHAT ARE WE TO DO?
673
00:27:18,770 --> 00:27:20,772
WHAT EVERY FRENCHMAN
DOES IN AN EMERGENCY--
674
00:27:20,772 --> 00:27:22,273
LEG IT FOR THE HILLS.
675
00:27:24,275 --> 00:27:26,777
IF I DO NOT WIN
THAT SPIRIT OF NOUVION CONTEST,
676
00:27:26,778 --> 00:27:28,780
I WILL TELL MICHELLE
677
00:27:28,780 --> 00:27:30,281
THAT YOU HAVE A FORGERY
678
00:27:30,281 --> 00:27:32,783
DOWN YOUR OTHER TROUSER LEG,
WHICH YOU INTEND TO GIVE HER.
679
00:27:36,788 --> 00:27:38,790
YOU WOULD NOT DO THAT.
680
00:27:38,790 --> 00:27:40,792
OH, BELIEVE ME, RENE,
681
00:27:40,792 --> 00:27:43,795
THE DECISION OF THE WIFE
OF THE EDITOR IS FINAL.
682
00:27:44,796 --> 00:27:47,799
OH, ALL RIGHT.
YOU WILL WIN.
683
00:27:47,799 --> 00:27:49,801
MICHELLE,
WAIT FOR US.
684
00:27:51,302 --> 00:27:53,804
( theme music playing )