1 00:00:03,069 --> 00:00:06,072 ( theme music playing ) 2 00:00:39,606 --> 00:00:42,609 IT IS POSSIBLE THAT THE MORE CURIOUS AMONG YOU 3 00:00:42,609 --> 00:00:44,611 ARE WONDERING WHAT I AM FIDDLING WITH 4 00:00:44,611 --> 00:00:46,613 UNDER THE BEDCLOTHES. 5 00:00:46,613 --> 00:00:49,115 I WILL NOT KEEP YOU IN SUSPENSE. 6 00:00:49,115 --> 00:00:51,117 IT IS A SAUSAGE. 7 00:00:52,619 --> 00:00:56,623 IN FACT, IT IS THE SAUSAGE CONTAINING THE FAMOUS PORTRAIT 8 00:00:56,623 --> 00:00:59,626 OF THE FALLEN MADONNA WITH THE BIG BOOBIES BY VAN CLOMP. 9 00:00:59,626 --> 00:01:02,629 I RESCUED IT LAST NIGHT WITH GREAT BRAVERY 10 00:01:02,629 --> 00:01:06,132 FROM UNDER THE VERY NOSE OF GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN. 11 00:01:06,132 --> 00:01:10,136 ALL I HAVE TO DO NOW IS GIVE IT TO LIEUTENANT GRUBER, 12 00:01:10,136 --> 00:01:12,638 WHO IS THE ONE WHO IS A BIT THIS WAY AND THAT-- 13 00:01:12,639 --> 00:01:15,141 MOSTLY THAT-- TO COPY THE PAINTING. 14 00:01:15,141 --> 00:01:18,144 I CAN THEN GIVE THE ORIGINAL TO THE COLONEL... 15 00:01:18,144 --> 00:01:19,645 AND GIVE THE COPY TO HERR FLICK, 16 00:01:19,646 --> 00:01:22,649 WHO WILL NO DOUBT HAVE ANOTHER COPY MADE TO SEND TO HITLER. 17 00:01:22,649 --> 00:01:25,151 WHAT COULD BE SIMPLER? 18 00:01:25,151 --> 00:01:28,154 NOW YOU WILL UNDERSTAND WHY VAN CLOMP 19 00:01:28,154 --> 00:01:30,656 IS NOT ONE OF MY FAVORITE ARTISTS. 20 00:01:30,657 --> 00:01:34,661 RENE, IS IT THAT YOU INTEND TO STAY IN BED ALL DAY? 21 00:01:34,661 --> 00:01:37,163 MICHELLE IS HERE. 22 00:01:37,163 --> 00:01:38,664 I WILL COME DOWN. 23 00:01:38,665 --> 00:01:39,666 NO, NO, NO. 24 00:01:39,666 --> 00:01:41,668 SHE IS ON THE LANDING, I WILL ASK HER TO COME IN. 25 00:01:41,668 --> 00:01:45,171 IS NOWHERE SACRED IN THIS HOUSE? 26 00:01:53,680 --> 00:01:54,681 ARE WE ALONE? 27 00:01:56,182 --> 00:01:57,683 YES, I THINK SO. 28 00:02:01,187 --> 00:02:02,688 LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY, 29 00:02:02,689 --> 00:02:05,191 I SHALL SAY THIS ONLY ONCE. 30 00:02:05,191 --> 00:02:06,692 WE HAVE A PROBLEM, 31 00:02:06,693 --> 00:02:09,696 THE AIRPLANE IN WHICH THE AIRMEN ARE TO ESCAPE 32 00:02:09,696 --> 00:02:11,698 IS AT THE BACK OF THE TRANSPORT MUSEUM. 33 00:02:11,698 --> 00:02:13,199 WHAT IS THE PROBLEM? 34 00:02:13,199 --> 00:02:15,701 IN FRONT OF IT ARE MANY ANTIQUE VEHICLES. 35 00:02:15,702 --> 00:02:19,205 GOOD, THEN PERHAPS WE CAN ABANDON THIS HAREBRAINED PLAN. 36 00:02:19,205 --> 00:02:22,208 NO, NO, NO. SHE HAS ANOTHER HAREBRAINED PLAN. 37 00:02:22,208 --> 00:02:25,211 THE GERMANS WILL BE ASKED TO GIVE PERMISSION 38 00:02:25,211 --> 00:02:27,213 TO HOLD AN ANTIQUE VEHICLE RALLY. 39 00:02:27,213 --> 00:02:29,715 THIS WILL CLEAR THE WAY FOR THE REMOVAL OF THE AIRPLANE, 40 00:02:29,716 --> 00:02:32,218 WHICH WILL BE YOUR RESPONSIBILITY. 41 00:02:32,218 --> 00:02:34,220 MY RESPONSIBILITY? 42 00:02:34,220 --> 00:02:35,221 WHY ME?! 43 00:02:35,221 --> 00:02:37,223 BECAUSE OF YOUR BRAVE EXPLOITS. 44 00:02:37,223 --> 00:02:39,225 THE RESISTANCE HAVE HONORED YOU 45 00:02:39,225 --> 00:02:41,227 BY SELECTING YOU FOR THIS TASK. 46 00:02:41,227 --> 00:02:42,728 OH, WHAT LUCK. 47 00:02:42,729 --> 00:02:44,230 ( footsteps approaching ) 48 00:02:44,230 --> 00:02:46,732 I HEAR A STEP ON THE STAIR. 49 00:02:49,736 --> 00:02:52,739 IT IS A GERMAN SOLDIER, HE IS LOOKING FOR THE BATHROOM. 50 00:02:52,739 --> 00:02:55,241 QUICK, MICHELLE, HIDE! 51 00:03:06,252 --> 00:03:08,754 SORRY, I WAS LOOKING FOR THE KHAZI. 52 00:03:08,755 --> 00:03:11,758 IT'S DOWNSTAIRS, SECOND DOOR ON THE LEFT. 53 00:03:14,260 --> 00:03:17,263 IT IS MY DAY OFF. 54 00:03:17,263 --> 00:03:20,766 LUCKY YOU. THANK YOU. 55 00:03:29,776 --> 00:03:33,780 WHY DO YOU SLEEP WITH A SAUSAGE IN YOUR BED? 56 00:03:34,781 --> 00:03:38,284 MY WIFE SOMETIMES LIKES A LITTLE NIBBLE IN THE NIGHT. 57 00:03:48,795 --> 00:03:50,296 WHERE IS IT, HANS? 58 00:03:50,296 --> 00:03:53,299 JUST DOWN THE CORRIDOR WHERE IT ALWAYS HAS BEEN. 59 00:03:53,299 --> 00:03:56,302 THE KNIFE! WHERE IS THE KNIFE TO OPEN THE SAUSAGE? 60 00:03:56,302 --> 00:03:58,804 OH, YES. I HAVE IT HERE, COLONEL. 61 00:03:58,805 --> 00:04:00,807 - GOOD, GIVE IT TO ME. - YES, SIR. 62 00:04:02,809 --> 00:04:05,812 NOW, WE MUST VERY DELICATELY 63 00:04:05,812 --> 00:04:07,814 REMOVE THE PAINTING FROM THE SAUSAGE. 64 00:04:09,315 --> 00:04:11,817 HERR FLICK OF THE GESTAPO. 65 00:04:18,324 --> 00:04:22,328 I HAVE BROUGHT FOR YOU THIS BUNCH OF WILD FLOWERS. 66 00:04:24,831 --> 00:04:27,834 HERR FLICK, HOW KIND. 67 00:04:27,834 --> 00:04:30,336 HAVE YOU A VASE OR OTHER RECEPTACLE? 68 00:04:30,336 --> 00:04:32,838 YES, IT CONTAINS ROSES. 69 00:04:32,839 --> 00:04:35,341 BUT I WILL THROW THEM AWAY 70 00:04:35,341 --> 00:04:38,344 IN FAVOR OF THESE BEAUTIFUL DANDELIONS AND... 71 00:04:38,344 --> 00:04:40,846 BELLADONNA AND RAGWORT 72 00:04:40,847 --> 00:04:44,851 AND OTHER THINGS I DO NOT RECOGNIZE. 73 00:04:46,853 --> 00:04:50,857 IT SETS THEM OFF WELL. I LIKE WILD THINGS. 74 00:04:50,857 --> 00:04:52,859 I KNOW THIS TO BE TRUE. 75 00:04:52,859 --> 00:04:54,360 DO YOU WISH ME TO ANNOUNCE YOU? 76 00:04:54,360 --> 00:04:55,361 IN TIME. 77 00:04:55,361 --> 00:04:56,862 FIRST, YOU MAY KISS ME. 78 00:04:57,864 --> 00:04:59,365 THANK YOU, HERR FLICK. 79 00:05:02,368 --> 00:05:05,371 STOP! RELEASE YOUR HAIR. 80 00:05:05,371 --> 00:05:08,374 I WISH IT TO CASCADE DOWN YOUR SHOULDERS. 81 00:05:08,374 --> 00:05:10,876 IT IS CASCADING. 82 00:05:10,877 --> 00:05:12,378 THEN GO TO IT. 83 00:05:19,385 --> 00:05:21,387 I ENJOYED THAT, HERR FLICK. 84 00:05:21,387 --> 00:05:22,888 I KNEW YOU WOULD. 85 00:05:22,889 --> 00:05:28,394 REMOVE ALL TRACES OF YOUR LIPSTICK FROM MY FACE. 86 00:05:31,898 --> 00:05:33,399 MM-MMM. 87 00:05:40,406 --> 00:05:42,908 NOW, I WILL GIVE YOU THE BAD NEWS. 88 00:05:42,909 --> 00:05:45,411 THE SAUSAGE I OBTAINED LAST NIGHT FROM 89 00:05:45,411 --> 00:05:47,413 VON KLINKERHOFFEN'S WARDROBE 90 00:05:47,413 --> 00:05:49,415 DID NOT CONTAIN THE PAINTING. 91 00:05:49,415 --> 00:05:52,418 SOME SMART ALECK MUST HAVE GOT THERE FIRST. 92 00:05:52,418 --> 00:05:54,420 OH, NO, HERR FLICK. 93 00:05:54,420 --> 00:05:56,422 SAY NOTHING OF THIS TO THE COLONEL. 94 00:05:56,422 --> 00:05:57,423 NO, HERR FLICK. 95 00:05:57,423 --> 00:05:58,924 BUT, WHAT ABOUT THE GOOD NEWS? 96 00:05:58,925 --> 00:06:02,428 THE GOOD NEWS IS, THERE IS NO MORE BAD NEWS. 97 00:06:03,930 --> 00:06:05,431 ANNOUNCE ME. 98 00:06:05,431 --> 00:06:08,434 WAIT, THERE'S A SPECK REMAINING OF THE LIPSTICK. 99 00:06:10,937 --> 00:06:13,940 HANS, THERE IS NO PAINTING, 100 00:06:13,940 --> 00:06:16,442 JUST STICKY GARLIC SAUSAGE. 101 00:06:16,442 --> 00:06:17,943 SOMEBODY BEAT US TO IT. 102 00:06:17,944 --> 00:06:19,445 ( knock at door ) 103 00:06:19,445 --> 00:06:20,946 YES? 104 00:06:22,949 --> 00:06:24,450 HERR FLICK OF THE GESTAPO. 105 00:06:24,450 --> 00:06:26,452 HERR FLICK OF THE GESTAPO. 106 00:06:26,452 --> 00:06:27,953 HERR FLICK OF THE GESTAPO! 107 00:06:27,954 --> 00:06:29,455 KEEP CALM, HANS. 108 00:06:29,455 --> 00:06:31,957 DON'T LET HIM IN. KEEP HIM WAITING. 109 00:06:31,958 --> 00:06:33,960 HIDE THE SAUSAGE. 110 00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:37,463 HIDE THE SAUSAGE? WHERE DO I HIDE THE SAUSAGE? 111 00:06:37,463 --> 00:06:39,465 QUICK! ANYWHERE! 112 00:06:44,971 --> 00:06:45,972 GO ON, LET HIM IN. 113 00:06:45,972 --> 00:06:48,474 LET HIM IN! 114 00:06:53,479 --> 00:06:56,982 HERR FLICK OF THE GESTAPO! 115 00:07:01,487 --> 00:07:02,488 HEIL HITLER. 116 00:07:02,488 --> 00:07:03,989 HEIL HITLER. 117 00:07:03,990 --> 00:07:04,490 KLOP! 118 00:07:09,996 --> 00:07:11,998 WE WERE JUST READING THE NEWSPAPER. 119 00:07:11,998 --> 00:07:14,500 YES, WE WERE JUST READING THE NEWSPAPER. 120 00:07:14,500 --> 00:07:17,002 ISN'T THE WAR GOING WONDERFULLY? 121 00:07:17,003 --> 00:07:19,005 WE SHOULD HAVE THEM MORE OFTEN, YOU KNOW? 122 00:07:19,005 --> 00:07:21,007 WE DO THEM SO WELL. 123 00:07:21,007 --> 00:07:22,508 IT HAS COME TO MY EARS 124 00:07:22,508 --> 00:07:25,511 THAT YOU HAVE GIVEN PERMISSION FOR A DISPLAY 125 00:07:25,511 --> 00:07:28,013 OF OLD TRACTORS AND SIMILAR VEHICLES. 126 00:07:28,014 --> 00:07:30,516 WE THOUGHT IT WOULD CHEER UP THE PEASANTS, HERR FLICK. 127 00:07:30,516 --> 00:07:34,019 AS WELL AS MAKING US LOOK LIKE JOLLY GOOD EGGS. 128 00:07:34,020 --> 00:07:36,022 I DO NOT TRUST THE FRENCH. 129 00:07:36,022 --> 00:07:39,525 THERE IS ALWAYS A PURPOSE BEHIND THEIR REQUESTS. 130 00:07:39,525 --> 00:07:42,027 VERY WELL, WE WILL CANCEL IT, HERR FLICK. 131 00:07:42,028 --> 00:07:44,530 YES, AND PUT THE ONES WHO SUGGESTED IT IN THE NICK. 132 00:07:44,530 --> 00:07:46,532 YOU WILL DO NO SUCH THING. 133 00:07:46,532 --> 00:07:48,534 YOU WILL OBSERVE THEM CLOSELY. 134 00:07:48,534 --> 00:07:52,538 YOU WILL FIND A WAY TO MINGLE AMONG THEM UNDETECTED. 135 00:07:52,538 --> 00:07:54,039 WITH YOUR EXPERIENCE, 136 00:07:54,040 --> 00:07:57,043 WOULDN'T IT BE BETTER IF YOU DID IT YOURSELF, HERR FLICK? 137 00:07:57,043 --> 00:07:59,045 YES, I HEAR YOU'RE A VERY GOOD MINGLER. 138 00:07:59,045 --> 00:08:01,047 PRACTICALLY UNDETECTABLE. 139 00:08:01,047 --> 00:08:03,049 YOU HAVE SUCH A FORGETTABLE FACE. 140 00:08:05,051 --> 00:08:07,553 I WILL BE THERE IN THE VICINITY. 141 00:08:07,553 --> 00:08:10,055 IF ANYTHING SUSPICIOUS OCCURS 142 00:08:10,056 --> 00:08:12,558 I WILL BE ON HAND AND I WILL TAKE ACTION. 143 00:08:12,558 --> 00:08:14,059 THAT IS ALL. HEIL HITLER! 144 00:08:14,060 --> 00:08:15,561 - HEIL HITLER! - KLOP! 145 00:08:21,567 --> 00:08:23,569 ( shouting ) HERR FLICK OF THE GE-- 146 00:08:23,569 --> 00:08:25,070 OH, SHE KNOWS. 147 00:08:36,482 --> 00:08:38,484 ( humming ) 148 00:08:42,989 --> 00:08:45,491 RENE, HOW MUCH LONGER 149 00:08:45,491 --> 00:08:47,493 DO I HAVE TO REMAIN BEHIND THE CURTAINS 150 00:08:47,493 --> 00:08:49,495 DISGUISED AS A SMALL BOY? 151 00:08:49,495 --> 00:08:51,997 MARIA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING DRESSED LIKE THAT? 152 00:08:51,998 --> 00:08:53,499 YOUR WIFE MADE ME DO IT. 153 00:08:53,499 --> 00:08:56,001 SHE SAYS GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN 154 00:08:56,002 --> 00:08:57,503 IS STILL SEARCHING FOR ME. 155 00:08:57,503 --> 00:09:00,005 UNTIL THE SEARCH DIES DOWN, 156 00:09:00,006 --> 00:09:03,509 I MUST DISGUISE MYSELF BY SCREWING UP MY HAIR UNDER MY CAP 157 00:09:03,509 --> 00:09:07,513 AND TAKING OFF ALL MY MAKEUP AND FLATTENING MY BOSOM. 158 00:09:07,513 --> 00:09:11,517 YOU HAVE MADE A GOOD JOB OF THE HAIR AND THE MAKEUP. 159 00:09:12,518 --> 00:09:16,522 RENE, EMBRACE ME. 160 00:09:16,522 --> 00:09:19,024 CRUSH YOUR LIPS TO MY LIPS, 161 00:09:19,025 --> 00:09:20,526 MAKE MY KNEES TREMBLE. 162 00:09:20,526 --> 00:09:22,027 THRILL ME. 163 00:09:22,028 --> 00:09:24,030 SEND RIPPLES DOWN MY SPINE. 164 00:09:25,031 --> 00:09:27,033 VERY WELL, GET THE CHAIR. 165 00:09:33,539 --> 00:09:36,041 DO I STILL MAKE THE LITTLE HAIRS STAND OUT 166 00:09:36,042 --> 00:09:37,543 ON THE BACK OF YOUR NECK? 167 00:09:37,543 --> 00:09:39,545 SOMETHING LIKE THAT. 168 00:09:39,545 --> 00:09:44,049 RENE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH YOUR ARMS AROUND MARIA? 169 00:09:44,050 --> 00:09:47,553 I AM FLATTENING HER BOSOM. 170 00:09:47,553 --> 00:09:49,054 FLATTENING HER BOSOM? 171 00:09:49,055 --> 00:09:51,057 OF COURSE, YOU STUPID WOMAN. 172 00:09:51,057 --> 00:09:54,060 LITTLE BOYS DO NOT HAVE STICKING-OUT BOSOMS. 173 00:09:54,060 --> 00:09:58,064 OH RENE, SUCH AN EYE FOR DETAIL. 174 00:09:58,064 --> 00:10:00,566 GET BEHIND THE BAR 175 00:10:00,566 --> 00:10:02,568 AND TRY NOT TO BE NOTICED. 176 00:10:03,569 --> 00:10:07,072 RENE, LIEUTENANT GRUBER IS IN THE BAR. 177 00:10:07,073 --> 00:10:09,075 HE IS ASKING FOR YOU. 178 00:10:09,075 --> 00:10:11,577 EDITH, YOU DEAL WITH HIM. 179 00:10:11,577 --> 00:10:15,080 HE FANCIES ME. IT IS VERY EMBARRASSING. 180 00:10:15,081 --> 00:10:16,582 BUT HE'S LOOKING FOR THE PAINTING. 181 00:10:16,582 --> 00:10:18,083 HE WANTS TO MAKE A COPY OF IT. 182 00:10:18,084 --> 00:10:21,087 OH HECK. WELL, TELL HIM TO COME IN HERE. 183 00:10:21,087 --> 00:10:23,589 I DO NOT LIKE TO BE SEEN TALKING WITH HIM. 184 00:10:25,591 --> 00:10:29,094 LIEUTENANT GRUBER, RENE INVITES YOU INTO THE BACK ROOM. 185 00:10:29,095 --> 00:10:30,596 OH... 186 00:10:32,098 --> 00:10:34,100 A RARE HONOR. 187 00:10:39,605 --> 00:10:41,106 HELLO! 188 00:10:41,107 --> 00:10:44,110 GOOD DAY TO YOU, RENE. 189 00:10:44,110 --> 00:10:46,612 OH, HOW COZY. 190 00:10:46,612 --> 00:10:51,617 THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I HAVE SEEN YOUR REAR QUARTERS. 191 00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:56,622 AMEN TO THAT. 192 00:10:56,622 --> 00:10:58,123 THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. 193 00:10:58,124 --> 00:11:01,627 I HAVE JUST HEARD FROM THE COLONEL. 194 00:11:01,627 --> 00:11:03,128 HE IS HOPPING MAD 195 00:11:03,129 --> 00:11:05,131 THAT HE OBTAINED ONLY AN EMPTY SAUSAGE. 196 00:11:05,131 --> 00:11:06,632 DO NOT WORRY, LIEUTENANT. 197 00:11:06,632 --> 00:11:08,133 I GOT THE ONE WITH THE PAINTING 198 00:11:08,134 --> 00:11:10,136 SO THAT YOU COULD DO THE COPYING. 199 00:11:10,136 --> 00:11:14,640 MARVELOUS. YOU HAVE A BRAVE STREAK, RENE. 200 00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:17,142 YOU MUST HAVE TAKEN THIS FROM UNDER THE VERY NOSE 201 00:11:17,143 --> 00:11:18,644 OF GENERAL VON KLINKERHOFFEN. 202 00:11:18,644 --> 00:11:22,147 UNDER HIS VERY KNEES-- I WAS HIDING UNDER THE BED. 203 00:11:22,148 --> 00:11:25,651 IT IS NOW SAFE UNDER THE BED OF MY WIFE'S MOTHER. 204 00:11:25,651 --> 00:11:27,152 FOLLOW ME. 205 00:11:40,666 --> 00:11:42,167 WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT SAUSAGE? 206 00:11:42,168 --> 00:11:48,174 I PRAYED TO GOD AND HE LEFT IT UNDER MY BED. 207 00:11:50,176 --> 00:11:52,678 YOU PRAYED TO GOD FOR A SAUSAGE? 208 00:11:52,678 --> 00:11:54,680 NO, NO, NO, NO. 209 00:11:54,680 --> 00:11:59,184 BUT OBVIOUSLY THIS WAS AS NEAR AS HE COULD GET. 210 00:12:01,687 --> 00:12:04,690 NO, NO, DO NOT EAT IT, YOU STUPID OLD BAT. 211 00:12:06,692 --> 00:12:08,193 IT IS CANVAS. 212 00:12:09,195 --> 00:12:12,698 IT'S THE NAME OF THE DUTCH BUTCHER, VAN CLOMP. 213 00:12:12,698 --> 00:12:14,700 OH MY GOD. 214 00:12:14,700 --> 00:12:18,203 DO NOT WORRY, WE CAN INVISIBLY MEND IT. 215 00:12:18,204 --> 00:12:21,207 WHY ARE YOU BRINGING INTO MY BEDROOM GERMANS? 216 00:12:21,207 --> 00:12:22,708 ( spitting ) 217 00:12:22,708 --> 00:12:25,210 IF THERE IS ANY MORE CANVAS, COME ON, SPIT IT OUT. 218 00:12:25,211 --> 00:12:27,213 GERMANS! GERMANS! 219 00:12:27,213 --> 00:12:30,216 THEY RAPE DEFENSELESS WOMEN. 220 00:12:31,717 --> 00:12:34,720 THIS ONE DOES NOT, 221 00:12:34,720 --> 00:12:37,222 HE IS MY FRIEND. 222 00:12:37,223 --> 00:12:38,724 COLLABORATOR! 223 00:12:40,726 --> 00:12:42,728 COLLABORATOR! 224 00:12:42,728 --> 00:12:45,230 IN-LAWS ARE ALWAYS SO MUCH TROUBLE. 225 00:12:45,231 --> 00:12:47,733 THIS IS WHY I DO NOT GET MARRIED. 226 00:12:49,235 --> 00:12:50,236 FLASHING BEDKNOBS? 227 00:12:50,236 --> 00:12:52,738 RENE, WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? 228 00:12:52,738 --> 00:12:56,241 IT MEANS SHE WANTS TO GO TO THE BATHROOM. 229 00:12:56,242 --> 00:12:58,244 WE MUST LEAVE. QUICKLY, QUICKLY. 230 00:13:02,248 --> 00:13:05,251 I SAY, CARSTAIRS, I THINK WE'D BETTER ANSWER THE WIRELESS. 231 00:13:08,254 --> 00:13:10,756 AAGH! LEAVE IT ALONE. 232 00:13:10,756 --> 00:13:16,261 NO, NO, NO. YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND HOW TO MAKE IT WORK. 233 00:13:16,262 --> 00:13:18,764 LEAVE IT ALONE. 234 00:13:18,764 --> 00:13:21,266 - WHAT'S SHE SAYING? - I DON'T KNOW, IT'S IN FRENCH. 235 00:13:21,267 --> 00:13:22,768 SO HOW ARE WE GOING TO SPEAK ON THIS THING? 236 00:13:22,768 --> 00:13:25,270 WELL, I KNOW A LITTLE BIT. 237 00:13:25,271 --> 00:13:27,773 WELL, GO AHEAD THEN. 238 00:13:27,773 --> 00:13:29,775 'ALLO? 239 00:13:31,777 --> 00:13:32,277 WAS THAT IT? 240 00:13:32,278 --> 00:13:34,280 YES. 241 00:13:34,280 --> 00:13:36,282 Male voice: 'Allo, Nighthawk, 242 00:13:36,282 --> 00:13:38,284 we have here the commanding officer 243 00:13:38,284 --> 00:13:41,287 who wants to speak to the British airmen, 244 00:13:41,287 --> 00:13:43,289 Fairfax and Carstairs. Over. 245 00:13:43,289 --> 00:13:45,791 I RECOGNIZE OUR NAMES. 246 00:13:45,791 --> 00:13:47,793 ( shouting ) HELLO. 247 00:13:47,793 --> 00:13:51,296 WE'RE... HERE. 248 00:13:51,297 --> 00:13:55,301 Male voice #2: Hello, Wing Commander Hargreaves here. 249 00:13:55,301 --> 00:13:57,803 IT'S RANDY HARGREAVES AGAIN. 250 00:13:57,803 --> 00:14:00,806 Are you still coming over in that antique kite? 251 00:14:00,806 --> 00:14:02,808 AS FAR AS WE KNOW. 252 00:14:02,808 --> 00:14:03,809 I see. 253 00:14:03,809 --> 00:14:06,812 Well, aim for Eastbourne, keep over to the right 254 00:14:06,812 --> 00:14:10,315 and we'll have a big net ready for you. 255 00:14:10,316 --> 00:14:11,817 ROGER. 256 00:14:11,817 --> 00:14:16,822 Oh, and there's a fast train to Victoria at 5:30. 257 00:14:16,822 --> 00:14:20,325 You buy the tickets and we'll refund the money. 258 00:14:20,326 --> 00:14:22,328 - OH, GOOD SHOW. - BANG ON. 259 00:14:22,328 --> 00:14:24,830 Oh, by the way, 260 00:14:24,830 --> 00:14:27,332 your girlfriend sends her best regards. 261 00:14:27,333 --> 00:14:29,335 WHO? DEIRDRE? 262 00:14:29,335 --> 00:14:32,338 Yeah, that's right. I'd put her on the line 263 00:14:32,338 --> 00:14:35,341 but she's in the shower at the moment. 264 00:14:37,843 --> 00:14:39,344 IN THE SHOWER? 265 00:14:39,345 --> 00:14:40,346 Over and out. 266 00:14:40,346 --> 00:14:44,350 THEY DON'T CALL HIM RANDY FOR NOTHING, DO THEY!? 267 00:14:44,350 --> 00:14:46,352 FOREIGNERS! ( spitting ) 268 00:15:04,236 --> 00:15:05,237 'ALLO, SOLDIER. 269 00:15:18,250 --> 00:15:22,754 'ALLO, YOU NAUGHTY BOY. 270 00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:25,257 HAVE YOU GOT A LIGHT? 271 00:15:36,268 --> 00:15:37,769 THANK YOU. 272 00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:41,273 CAN I DO FOR YOU ANYTHING ELSE? 273 00:15:41,273 --> 00:15:43,775 I DO NOT THINK SO. 274 00:15:47,780 --> 00:15:49,782 YVETTE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? 275 00:15:49,782 --> 00:15:52,284 YOU ARE GOING TO GET MY CAFE A BAD NAME. 276 00:15:52,284 --> 00:15:53,785 IT IS MY AFTERNOON OFF. 277 00:15:53,786 --> 00:15:56,288 I AM TRYING TO GET TOGETHER ENOUGH MONEY 278 00:15:56,288 --> 00:15:59,791 SO THAT YOU AND I CAN TAKE A TRAIN TO PARIS 279 00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:01,794 AND DISAPPEAR. 280 00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,796 HOW ARE YOU DOING? 281 00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:08,801 I HAVE ENOUGH MONEY FOR THE BUS TO THE STATION. 282 00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,803 PERHAPS YOU SHOULD HAVE A SPRING SALE. 283 00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:16,808 RENE, HOLD ME AND KISS ME 284 00:16:16,809 --> 00:16:19,311 JUST FOR A MOMENT. 285 00:16:19,311 --> 00:16:22,314 I AM A RESPECTABLE CAFE OWNER. 286 00:16:22,314 --> 00:16:24,816 I CANNOT BE SEEN WITH A WOMAN OF THE STREETS. 287 00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:26,318 ( dog whines ) 288 00:16:36,829 --> 00:16:38,831 'ALLO, SOLDIER. 289 00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:43,335 IF YOU DO NOT MAUVE ALONG 290 00:16:43,335 --> 00:16:46,838 I SHALL HAVE TO KNOCK YOU FOR SOLICITING FOR IMMORAL PORPOISES. 291 00:16:46,839 --> 00:16:50,342 YOU ENGLISH TWIT, I AM YVETTE, THE WAITRESS. 292 00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:53,845 I DO NOT CARE. YOU ARE ON MY POTCH. 293 00:16:53,846 --> 00:16:56,348 I HAVE MY DUTY TO DO. 294 00:16:56,348 --> 00:16:59,851 GO, AND TAKE YOUR PUDDLE WITH YOU. 295 00:17:14,867 --> 00:17:17,369 I SAY, YOU CHAPS, WHAT ARE YOU UP TO? 296 00:17:17,369 --> 00:17:19,871 JUST HAVING A BREATH OF FRESH AIR. 297 00:17:21,373 --> 00:17:22,874 DON'T GET CAUGHT. 298 00:17:32,885 --> 00:17:34,887 ( circus music playing ) 299 00:17:38,891 --> 00:17:40,392 ( record scratches ) 300 00:17:53,405 --> 00:17:55,407 IT IS I, LECLERC. 301 00:17:55,407 --> 00:17:58,410 I AM DISGUISED AS A CLOWN. 302 00:17:58,410 --> 00:18:01,413 THE DISGUISE WAS NOT NECESSARY. 303 00:18:01,413 --> 00:18:03,415 I HAVE A MESSAGE FROM MICHELLE. 304 00:18:03,415 --> 00:18:06,918 SHE WILL ARRIVE TO COLLECT THE MOTOR FROM THE MOWER 305 00:18:06,919 --> 00:18:08,420 THAT IS IN THE BATH CHAIR 306 00:18:08,420 --> 00:18:12,424 WHICH IS TO GO INTO THE AIRPLANE THAT IS IN THE MUSEUM 307 00:18:12,424 --> 00:18:13,925 READY FOR THE TAKE-OFF. 308 00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:16,428 SHE IS OFF HER ROCKER. 309 00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:18,430 ALSO... 310 00:18:18,430 --> 00:18:21,933 YOU ARE TO COLLECT 200 FEET OF ELASTIC 311 00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:23,936 TO MAKE A CATAPULT TO ASSIST IT INTO THE AIR. 312 00:18:23,936 --> 00:18:26,438 200 FEET OF ELASTIC? 313 00:18:26,438 --> 00:18:28,940 WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO FIND 200 FEET OF ELASTIC? 314 00:18:28,941 --> 00:18:32,945 EVERY MAN IN THE VILLAGE WILL GIVE UP HIS BRACES. 315 00:18:32,945 --> 00:18:34,947 I HAVE ALREADY GIVEN UP MINE. 316 00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:36,949 VIVE LA FRANCE. 317 00:18:38,450 --> 00:18:40,452 LOOK OUT, THERE ARE GERMANS COMING. 318 00:18:43,455 --> 00:18:44,956 GET THEM ON! 319 00:18:50,963 --> 00:18:53,966 AND NOW, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, 320 00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:55,968 WITH YOUR PERMISSION, 321 00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:57,469 NEVER BEFORE SEEN IN NOUVION, 322 00:18:57,469 --> 00:19:00,472 SEVEN CLUBS IN THE AIR AT ONE TIME. 323 00:19:00,472 --> 00:19:03,975 NEVER BEFORE SEEN. MUSIC, MAESTRO, PLEASE. 324 00:19:06,478 --> 00:19:07,979 AH, HA, SEVEN. 325 00:19:12,484 --> 00:19:14,986 I DID NOT SAY I COULD CATCH THEM. 326 00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:23,495 WHERE IS RENE? WE WISH TO SPEAK TO HIM. 327 00:19:23,495 --> 00:19:26,998 HE IS JUST CLEARING A TABLE. HE WILL BE HERE IN A MINUTE. 328 00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:29,501 AH, CAPTAIN, COLONEL, 329 00:19:29,501 --> 00:19:31,503 I AM SORRY IF I HAVE KEPT YOU WAITING. 330 00:19:31,503 --> 00:19:35,507 I WAS DEALING WITH A STROLLING IDIOT. 331 00:19:35,507 --> 00:19:38,510 RENE, THERE ARE GOING ON 332 00:19:38,510 --> 00:19:40,512 THINGS WE DO NOT UNDERSTAND. 333 00:19:40,512 --> 00:19:43,515 REALLY, COLONEL? 334 00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:46,017 A DRINK ON THE HOUSE, PERHAPS? 335 00:19:46,018 --> 00:19:47,519 THANK YOU. 336 00:19:47,519 --> 00:19:50,522 FOR INSTANCE, WHERE IS THE MOTOR OF THE GENERAL'S LAWN MOWER?. 337 00:19:50,522 --> 00:19:52,524 SEARCH ME. 338 00:19:52,524 --> 00:19:54,526 WE DID. WE DIDN'T FIND IT. 339 00:19:54,526 --> 00:19:58,029 SECOND, THIS VEHICLE RALLY, 340 00:19:58,030 --> 00:19:59,531 WHAT IS BEHIND IT? 341 00:19:59,531 --> 00:20:03,034 NOTHING, COLONEL. IT IS JUST US SIMPLE PEASANTS 342 00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:06,038 ENJOYING OURSELVES WITH OLD STEAM ENGINES 343 00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:08,040 AND TRACTORS AND THINGS. 344 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:12,044 WE ARE, AFTER ALL, ALL LITTLE BOYS AT HEART, ARE WE NOT? 345 00:20:12,044 --> 00:20:16,548 THIS IS TRUE. I STILL SLEEP WITH HERMAN, MY TEDDY BEAR. 346 00:20:18,050 --> 00:20:21,053 I WARN YOU, RENE, HERR FLICK WILL BE THERE, 347 00:20:21,053 --> 00:20:23,555 AND WE SHALL ALSO BE THERE. 348 00:20:23,555 --> 00:20:24,556 MINGLING. 349 00:20:24,556 --> 00:20:26,558 TRUTHFULLY, COLONEL, 350 00:20:26,558 --> 00:20:29,561 THERE IS NOTHING UNUSUAL GOING ON IN THE VILLAGE. 351 00:20:32,064 --> 00:20:34,066 MY BRACES. 352 00:20:40,072 --> 00:20:42,574 WHY DID THIS MAN GIVE YOU HIS BRACES? 353 00:20:45,577 --> 00:20:48,580 IT IS A SECRET SOCIETY, COLONEL. 354 00:20:48,580 --> 00:20:51,082 IT IS THE GRAND ORDER OF THE UH-- OF THE UH-- 355 00:20:51,083 --> 00:20:53,085 - OF THE NIGHT OWLS. - OF THE NIGHT OWLS. 356 00:20:53,085 --> 00:20:56,088 THAT IS RIGHT. THE GRAND ORDER OF THE NIGHT OWLS. 357 00:20:56,088 --> 00:20:59,091 I AM THE GRAND MASTER. 358 00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:01,093 HE IS THE BIG HOOT. 359 00:21:06,598 --> 00:21:10,602 THAT MAN HAS JUST BEEN INITIATED. 360 00:21:10,602 --> 00:21:14,606 FOR THREE WEEKS HE MUST GO AROUND WITH NO BRACES. 361 00:21:14,606 --> 00:21:17,609 WHAT HAVE BRACES TO DO WITH NIGHT OWLS? 362 00:21:20,612 --> 00:21:23,114 NIGHT OWLS DO NOT WEAR BRACES, 363 00:21:23,115 --> 00:21:25,617 THAT IS WHY HE HAS TAKEN THEM OFF. 364 00:21:25,617 --> 00:21:29,621 IT IS ALL QUITE LOGICAL WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT IT. 365 00:21:41,633 --> 00:21:44,135 DO THEY HAVE GIRLS? 366 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:48,140 I WARN YOU, RENE, 367 00:21:48,140 --> 00:21:50,142 WE WILL BE KEEPING OUR EYE UPON YOU. 368 00:21:50,142 --> 00:21:53,145 I AM NO FOOL. 369 00:21:53,145 --> 00:21:55,647 AND I AM NO FOOL EITHER. 370 00:21:55,647 --> 00:21:58,149 CAPTAIN, YOUR HAT. 371 00:21:59,651 --> 00:22:01,653 OH, YES. 372 00:22:03,655 --> 00:22:05,657 'ALLO, CAPTAIN. 373 00:22:05,657 --> 00:22:08,660 YOUR DOGGY LOOKS TIRED. 374 00:22:12,164 --> 00:22:14,166 EDITH, YOU HEARD WHAT HE SAID. 375 00:22:14,166 --> 00:22:16,168 THIS IS GETTING FAR TOO DANGEROUS. 376 00:22:16,168 --> 00:22:17,669 WE MUST GET A MESSAGE TO MICHELLE 377 00:22:17,669 --> 00:22:20,171 AND TELL HER TO CALL THE WHOLE THING OFF. 378 00:22:20,172 --> 00:22:22,674 YOU HAVE THE GUTS OF A JELLYFISH. 379 00:22:22,674 --> 00:22:24,175 YVETTE! MARIA! 380 00:22:26,678 --> 00:22:29,681 NOW LISTEN CAREFULLY, 381 00:22:29,681 --> 00:22:32,684 MICHELLE SAID THIS ONLY ONCE. 382 00:22:32,684 --> 00:22:34,185 TOMORROW MORNING AT 9:30 383 00:22:34,186 --> 00:22:37,189 WE MUST BE IN POSITION ON THE ROAD BY THE MUSEUM. 384 00:22:37,189 --> 00:22:39,691 EDITH, ARE YOU MAD? 385 00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:42,193 WE WILL STICK OUT LIKE A CARROT IN AN OMELET. 386 00:22:42,194 --> 00:22:43,695 DO NOT INTERRUPT. 387 00:22:45,197 --> 00:22:48,700 WE WILL BE DISGUISED AS ROAD WORKERS. 388 00:22:48,700 --> 00:22:51,202 WHEN THEY DRAW THE VEHICLES OUT, WE RUN IN. 389 00:22:51,203 --> 00:22:53,205 WHAT DO WE DO THEN? 390 00:22:53,205 --> 00:22:55,707 MICHELLE WILL BE THERE TO TELL YOU THE REST OF THE PLAN. 391 00:22:55,707 --> 00:22:59,711 FOR WHAT REASON CAN YOU NOT REVEAL THE REST OF THE PLAN NOW? 392 00:23:03,215 --> 00:23:06,218 THAT IS ALL SHE HAS TOLD ME. 393 00:23:06,218 --> 00:23:08,220 IF WE ARE CAPTURED, THE LESS WE KNOW THE BETTER. 394 00:23:08,220 --> 00:23:11,223 I WOULD BE QUITE HAPPY TO KNOW NOTHING AT ALL. 395 00:23:11,223 --> 00:23:17,229 OH, THAT POOR OLD LADY. HELP HER. 396 00:23:18,730 --> 00:23:20,231 THANK YOU, MY CHILD. 397 00:23:20,232 --> 00:23:25,737 I WAS JUST GATHERING A FEW STICKS AS KINDLING FOR MY FIRE. 398 00:23:25,737 --> 00:23:27,739 YOU CAN SHARE SOME OF MINE, 399 00:23:27,739 --> 00:23:29,240 I HAVE SOME IN THE BACK. 400 00:23:29,241 --> 00:23:33,745 YOU WILL BE REWARDED, CHILD. GIVE ME A SEAT AT THE BAR. 401 00:23:43,255 --> 00:23:47,759 LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY, I SHALL SAY THIS ONLY ONCE. 402 00:23:47,759 --> 00:23:49,761 OH MY GOD. 403 00:23:49,761 --> 00:23:53,264 I HAVE COME FOR THE BATH CHAIR. 404 00:23:53,265 --> 00:23:55,767 WHY ARE YOU DISGUISED AS THE GRANDMOTHER 405 00:23:55,767 --> 00:23:57,268 OF MY WIFE'S MOTHER? 406 00:23:57,269 --> 00:24:02,274 NO ONE WILL SUSPECT AN OLD LADY IN A BATH CHAIR. 407 00:24:02,274 --> 00:24:05,277 THEY WILL IF YOU DO NOT COVER UP YOUR LEGS. 408 00:24:05,277 --> 00:24:07,779 THE BATH CHAIR IS OUTSIDE. 409 00:24:08,780 --> 00:24:11,282 YVETTE, MARIA, MY LAD, 410 00:24:11,283 --> 00:24:13,285 HELP THIS EXCEEDINGLY ANCIENT OLD LADY 411 00:24:13,285 --> 00:24:14,786 TO THE BATH CHAIR 412 00:24:14,786 --> 00:24:16,788 BEFORE SHE KICKS THE BUCKET IN MY BAR. 413 00:24:19,291 --> 00:24:21,293 THANK YOU, MY CHILDREN. 414 00:24:21,293 --> 00:24:24,796 YOU WILL BE REWARDED FOR YOUR KINDNESS. 415 00:24:34,806 --> 00:24:37,308 WHO IS THE PIECE OF CRUMPET? 416 00:24:40,812 --> 00:24:43,214 ( motor sputtering ) 417 00:24:57,229 --> 00:24:59,231 OH, RENE. 418 00:24:59,231 --> 00:25:02,734 THE SIGHT OF YOUR WHITE BODY 419 00:25:02,734 --> 00:25:06,237 IS DRIVING ME FRANTIC WITH YEARNING. 420 00:25:06,238 --> 00:25:08,240 I AM FINDING IT HARD TO CONTROL-- 421 00:25:10,242 --> 00:25:13,745 HOLD ME TO YOU IN YOUR STRONG WHITE ARMS. 422 00:25:13,745 --> 00:25:17,749 YVETTE, ROUGH ROAD MENDERS DO NOT HUG EACH OTHER. 423 00:25:27,759 --> 00:25:29,260 DRAT IT! 424 00:25:29,261 --> 00:25:31,763 MY STOCKINGS HAVE LADDERED UNDER MY TROUSERS. 425 00:25:31,763 --> 00:25:34,766 STOP COMPLAINING, EMPTY YOUR BARROW. 426 00:25:41,773 --> 00:25:43,775 EDITH, 427 00:25:43,775 --> 00:25:46,778 DO YOU HAVE TO BEHAVE IN THAT DISGUSTING MANNER? 428 00:25:46,778 --> 00:25:49,280 IT IS PART OF MY CHARACTER. 429 00:25:53,285 --> 00:25:55,787 WHY ARE THEY DOING ALL THIS DIGGING? 430 00:25:55,787 --> 00:25:57,288 I THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO FLY OUT? 431 00:25:57,289 --> 00:26:00,292 I EXPECT IT'S ALL PART OF A CLEVER WHEEZE 432 00:26:00,292 --> 00:26:02,794 BY THAT RATHER DISHY RESISTANCE GIRL. 433 00:26:02,794 --> 00:26:04,796 HAVE YOU GOT A BIT OF A PASH FOR HER? 434 00:26:04,796 --> 00:26:07,799 I HAVE ACTUALLY. 435 00:26:07,799 --> 00:26:10,802 CAVEE, HERE COMES A TANK. 436 00:26:17,809 --> 00:26:19,811 PFFT. 437 00:26:19,811 --> 00:26:23,314 ( whistle blows) STOP! STOP! 438 00:26:24,816 --> 00:26:28,319 EXCUSE ME, MADAME, WHICH WAY DO I HAVE TO GO 439 00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:31,823 TO GET TO THE MUSEUM OF ANCIENT VEHICLES? 440 00:26:31,823 --> 00:26:34,826 MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. 441 00:26:36,828 --> 00:26:39,831 WE WILL TAKE NO NOTICE OF THIS RUDE PEASANT. 442 00:26:39,831 --> 00:26:41,833 DRIVE ON, CLARENCE. 443 00:26:49,341 --> 00:26:51,343 HALT! 444 00:26:51,343 --> 00:26:55,347 YOU, DIGGING PEASANT, 445 00:26:55,347 --> 00:26:58,350 WHERE IS THE MUSEUM? 446 00:26:58,350 --> 00:27:00,352 I AM SPEAKING TO YOU. 447 00:27:00,352 --> 00:27:01,853 TURN AND FACE ME, 448 00:27:01,853 --> 00:27:05,356 OR I WILL SHOOT YOU WITH MY BIG GUN. 449 00:27:10,862 --> 00:27:14,365 IT IS THAT WAY. 450 00:27:16,868 --> 00:27:18,369 RENE, YOU! 451 00:27:18,370 --> 00:27:19,871 WHY ARE YOU DIGGING THE ROAD? 452 00:27:19,871 --> 00:27:24,375 WE ARE REPAIRING IT FOR THE GLORIOUS GERMAN TANKS. 453 00:27:24,376 --> 00:27:29,381 BUT YOUR BEAUTIFUL ARTISTIC HANDS WILL BE RUINED. 454 00:27:30,382 --> 00:27:32,384 IT IS A TERRIBLE WAR. 455 00:27:32,384 --> 00:27:36,388 HERE, TAKE MY DRIVING GLOVES. 456 00:27:36,388 --> 00:27:38,890 I NORMALLY ONLY WEAR THEM WHEN I AM FIRING MY GUN, 457 00:27:38,890 --> 00:27:40,892 BUT I WILL NOT BE SHOOTING TODAY. 458 00:27:40,892 --> 00:27:42,894 IT'S A PLEASURE TRIP. 459 00:27:43,895 --> 00:27:46,397 OFF WE GO, CLARENCE. 460 00:27:52,904 --> 00:27:57,909 I AM FORCING THE RUBBER PIPE OVER THE NIPPLE. 461 00:27:57,909 --> 00:27:59,911 HOW FORTUNATE YOU ARE HERE, HERR FLICK. 462 00:27:59,911 --> 00:28:01,913 I HAVE NO EXPERIENCE OF THIS SORT OF THING. 463 00:28:01,913 --> 00:28:05,416 IT WOULD BE BEYOND YOUR CAPABILITIES. 464 00:28:05,417 --> 00:28:07,419 IT IS STIFF AND HARD. 465 00:28:10,422 --> 00:28:11,423 IT IS DONE. 466 00:28:11,423 --> 00:28:12,924 NOW... 467 00:28:12,924 --> 00:28:15,927 I WILL WATCH THE GAUGE; YOU WILL PUMP. 468 00:28:15,927 --> 00:28:18,429 PLACE YOUR FEET IN THE STIRRUPS. 469 00:28:22,434 --> 00:28:23,935 BEND OVER. 470 00:28:25,937 --> 00:28:29,440 IT IS MORE EFFECTIVE IF YOU GRIP IT FIRMLY WITH BOTH HANDS. 471 00:28:31,943 --> 00:28:35,446 NOW PULL, THRUST, 472 00:28:35,447 --> 00:28:37,449 PULL, THRUST, 473 00:28:37,449 --> 00:28:41,953 PULL, THRUST-- FASTER, FASTER! 474 00:28:41,953 --> 00:28:44,956 PULL, THRUST, PULL, THRUST... 475 00:28:44,956 --> 00:28:47,458 THRUST, THRUST-- IT IS BUILDING UP. 476 00:28:47,459 --> 00:28:49,961 THRUST, THRUST, THRUST. 477 00:28:49,961 --> 00:28:51,462 THRUST. WE ARE NEARLY THERE. 478 00:28:51,463 --> 00:28:52,964 PULL, THRUST, PULL, THRUST. 479 00:28:52,964 --> 00:28:55,466 I CANNOT KEEP IT UP MUCH LONGER. 480 00:28:55,467 --> 00:28:57,969 YOU MUST, YOU MUST! THRUST, THRUST. 481 00:28:57,969 --> 00:29:01,472 I AM PULLING AND THRUSTING, HERR FLICK. 482 00:29:01,473 --> 00:29:03,975 STOP! STOP! 483 00:29:08,480 --> 00:29:09,981 WAS THAT ALL RIGHT? 484 00:29:09,981 --> 00:29:12,483 FOR ME, EXCELLENT. 485 00:29:12,484 --> 00:29:14,486 HOW ABOUT YOU? 486 00:29:14,486 --> 00:29:17,989 EXHAUSTING, BUT VERY EXCITING. 487 00:29:17,989 --> 00:29:20,992 WAS THIS YOUR FIRST TIME? 488 00:29:20,992 --> 00:29:23,494 YES, NEVER BEFORE 489 00:29:23,495 --> 00:29:25,497 HAS ONE GONE FLAT ON ME. 490 00:29:35,006 --> 00:29:37,008 MORE COAL, HANS, MORE COAL. 491 00:29:37,008 --> 00:29:40,011 MORE COAL, HE SAYS, ALL THE TIME, MORE COAL. 492 00:29:40,011 --> 00:29:43,014 WHEN DO I GET A GO WITH THE WHEEL? 10 MINUTES YOU'VE HAD IT. 493 00:29:43,014 --> 00:29:45,516 WHO COMMANDEERED THE STEAMROLLER? 494 00:29:45,517 --> 00:29:49,020 - WHO PUT THE DRIVERS IN JAIL? - YOU DID, COLONEL. 495 00:29:49,020 --> 00:29:53,524 THAT'S WHY I'M AT THE WHEEL AND YOU'RE AT THE COAL. 496 00:29:53,525 --> 00:29:56,027 CAN I WORK THE WHISTLE? 497 00:29:56,027 --> 00:29:58,029 JUST ONE TOOT. 498 00:29:59,030 --> 00:30:01,032 ( whistle blows ) 499 00:30:03,034 --> 00:30:06,037 THAT IS MORE FUN THAN DRIVING IT. 500 00:30:06,037 --> 00:30:10,041 - IS IT? - ( whistle blows ) 501 00:30:16,047 --> 00:30:17,048 I CAN SEE SMOKE. 502 00:30:17,048 --> 00:30:20,051 QUICK, MY POWERFUL BINOCULARS. 503 00:30:21,553 --> 00:30:23,555 KEEP STILL. 504 00:30:25,557 --> 00:30:27,559 I CAN SEE SMOKE 505 00:30:27,559 --> 00:30:30,061 AND SMELL LILY OF THE VALLEY. 506 00:30:30,061 --> 00:30:32,563 THAT WAS THE PERFUME YOU GAVE ME. 507 00:30:32,564 --> 00:30:35,567 YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO BATH IN IT. 508 00:30:36,568 --> 00:30:40,071 MMM. WE NEED TO BE CLOSER. 509 00:30:40,071 --> 00:30:42,573 VERY WELL, HERR FLICK. 510 00:30:42,574 --> 00:30:46,077 GET YOUR NOSE OUT OF MY EAR. 511 00:30:46,077 --> 00:30:48,079 PUT THESE AWAY. 512 00:30:56,588 --> 00:30:59,591 HEY, WHOA. WHOA. 513 00:31:02,093 --> 00:31:05,596 PSST! IT IS I, LECLERC. 514 00:31:05,597 --> 00:31:09,100 - WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN? - ( stammers ) 515 00:31:09,100 --> 00:31:12,603 PEOPLE STOP ME AND I HAVE TO TELL FOR THEM THEIR FORTUNES. 516 00:31:12,604 --> 00:31:15,106 WHAT IS HAPPENING? 517 00:31:15,106 --> 00:31:19,110 I HAVE A MESSAGE FROM MICHELLE. 518 00:31:19,110 --> 00:31:21,112 THE TRACTORS ARE LEAVING THE SHED. 519 00:31:21,112 --> 00:31:23,614 COME. GET IN QUICK. I WILL TAKE YOU THERE. 520 00:31:23,615 --> 00:31:26,117 IN THE BACK, EVERYBODY. 521 00:31:26,117 --> 00:31:29,120 HEY, HEY, HEY! BE CAREFUL OF THE CROWN DERBY. 522 00:31:29,120 --> 00:31:31,622 AND WATCH OUT FOR HIS CRYSTAL BALL. 523 00:31:33,124 --> 00:31:36,127 YOU CAN SIT BESIDE ME. YOU HAVE A LUCKY FACE. 524 00:31:38,129 --> 00:31:41,132 - MMM. - WHAT AN HONOR. 525 00:31:58,917 --> 00:32:00,418 ( honks ) 526 00:32:07,926 --> 00:32:09,427 MICHELLE! 527 00:32:09,427 --> 00:32:13,931 MICHELLE, AN ARMORED CAR IS APPROACHING. 528 00:32:13,932 --> 00:32:17,936 HAVE READY YOUR GIRLS. IF NECESSARY WE WILL SHOOT. 529 00:32:17,936 --> 00:32:20,438 BUT THE BULLETS WILL BOUNCE OFF. 530 00:32:20,438 --> 00:32:22,940 DO NOT BE A DEFEATIST. 531 00:32:24,943 --> 00:32:26,444 PAY ATTENTION! 532 00:32:29,447 --> 00:32:31,949 AH. 533 00:32:33,952 --> 00:32:35,954 HELLO. 534 00:32:37,455 --> 00:32:39,457 PAY ATTENTION! 535 00:32:39,457 --> 00:32:42,960 I WILL LEAD THE PROCESSION TO THE TOWN SQUARE. 536 00:32:42,961 --> 00:32:45,964 YOU WILL KEEP TO THE MAIN ROAD, 537 00:32:45,964 --> 00:32:48,466 YOU WILL STAY VERY CLOSE BEHIND ME 538 00:32:48,466 --> 00:32:51,969 AND THERE WILL BE NO DEVIATION. 539 00:32:51,970 --> 00:32:55,974 TOOT YOUR TOOTERS IF YOU UNDERSTAND. 540 00:32:55,974 --> 00:32:58,476 - ( engine tooting ) - ( screams ) 541 00:33:11,489 --> 00:33:13,991 THE MUSEUM IS THE OTHER SIDE OF THE HEDGE. 542 00:33:13,992 --> 00:33:17,996 WE WILL LEAVE THIS THING HERE AND WE WILL CREEP CLOSER ON FOOT 543 00:33:17,996 --> 00:33:19,998 TO SEE WHAT IS HAPPENING. 544 00:33:19,998 --> 00:33:23,501 - ( blows ) - HANS, LEAVE THE TOOTER ALONE. 545 00:33:23,501 --> 00:33:25,503 YOU WILL USE UP ALL THE STEAM. 546 00:33:25,503 --> 00:33:28,005 ♪ TOTE THAT BARGE, LIFT THAT BALE. ♪ 547 00:33:28,006 --> 00:33:29,507 AND PUT ON SOME MORE COAL 548 00:33:29,507 --> 00:33:33,010 IN CASE WE HAVE TO MAKE A QUICK GETAWAY. 549 00:33:41,519 --> 00:33:45,022 WE WILL STOP HERE, CREEP FORWARD OF THE HEDGE 550 00:33:45,023 --> 00:33:49,027 - AND OBSERVE WHAT IS GOING ON. - YES, HERR FLICK. 551 00:33:50,528 --> 00:33:55,032 BRING MY POWERFUL BINOCULARS AND THE RUG. 552 00:33:55,033 --> 00:33:56,534 THE RUG? 553 00:33:56,534 --> 00:34:01,038 I DO NOT WISH TO GET BITS OF STRAW ALL OVER YOUR UNIFORM. 554 00:34:01,039 --> 00:34:03,541 YOU THINK OF EVERYTHING, HERR FLICK. 555 00:34:03,541 --> 00:34:06,544 ONE MUST TAKE PRECAUTIONS. 556 00:34:15,053 --> 00:34:17,055 Leclerc: WHOA, WHOA! 557 00:34:19,557 --> 00:34:22,560 WE WILL WAIT HERE, UNTIL THE RALLY MOVES OFF. 558 00:34:22,560 --> 00:34:24,061 Gruber: PAY ATTENTION, 559 00:34:24,062 --> 00:34:28,066 I WILL FIRE MY GUN AS A SIGNAL TO START. 560 00:34:30,568 --> 00:34:33,070 DON'T WORRY, IT'S ONLY A BLANK. 561 00:34:34,572 --> 00:34:36,574 FINGERS IN EARS, CLARENCE. 562 00:34:41,579 --> 00:34:43,080 FORWARD! 563 00:34:46,584 --> 00:34:48,085 DRIVE ON. 564 00:35:01,099 --> 00:35:03,101 Rene: THEY ARE MOVING OFF. 565 00:35:03,101 --> 00:35:05,103 Edith: IN WE GO. 566 00:35:05,103 --> 00:35:07,605 RENE, BRING THE ELASTIC. 567 00:35:07,605 --> 00:35:10,107 SHOULD I NOT STAY HERE AND LOOK AFTER THE HORSE? 568 00:35:10,108 --> 00:35:11,609 KEEP IT TICKING OVER? 569 00:35:11,609 --> 00:35:14,111 IT IS, AFTER ALL, OUR GETAWAY CAR. 570 00:35:14,112 --> 00:35:17,115 LECLERC WILL LOOK AFTER THE HORSE. 571 00:35:30,628 --> 00:35:33,130 WHAT A FINE SIGHT. 572 00:35:34,632 --> 00:35:37,635 HANS, WE MUST SLIP IN AMONGST THEM UNOBSERVED. 573 00:35:37,635 --> 00:35:40,638 UNOBSERVED? IN A STEAMROLLER? 574 00:35:40,638 --> 00:35:43,140 DON'T ARGUE. 575 00:35:45,143 --> 00:35:46,644 CAN I DRIVE? 576 00:35:46,644 --> 00:35:48,646 OH, VERY WELL. 577 00:36:05,163 --> 00:36:09,667 THEY ARE SO BIG AND HEAVY. 578 00:36:09,667 --> 00:36:12,169 DID YOU FEEL THE EARTH TREMBLE? 579 00:36:14,672 --> 00:36:17,174 YES, INDEED, HERR FLICK. 580 00:36:17,175 --> 00:36:20,178 IT WAS A MEMORABLE EXPERIENCE. 581 00:36:20,178 --> 00:36:23,181 WHAT HAPPENS NOW? 582 00:36:23,181 --> 00:36:27,185 COME, WE WILL FOLLOW IN MY STAFF CAR. 583 00:36:33,191 --> 00:36:36,194 MORE COAL. 584 00:36:36,194 --> 00:36:37,695 - ( whistle blows ) - HERE WE GO. 585 00:36:43,701 --> 00:36:46,203 HANS, YOU FOOL, YOU'RE GOING THE WRONG WAY!! 586 00:36:46,204 --> 00:36:47,205 OH DEAR. 587 00:36:47,205 --> 00:36:49,207 FORE! 588 00:36:50,708 --> 00:36:54,211 - WHERE IS THE BRAKE? - REVERSE THE LEVER. 589 00:36:55,713 --> 00:36:57,214 IT IS STUCK. 590 00:36:58,716 --> 00:37:01,218 IF THERE IS ANYBODY IN THE CAR, 591 00:37:01,219 --> 00:37:03,721 PLEASE GET OUT OF IT VERY QUICKLY. 592 00:37:04,722 --> 00:37:07,725 - HOW DO YOU STOP IT? - REDUCE THE PRESSURE. 593 00:37:07,725 --> 00:37:10,728 REDUCE THE PRESSURE, HE SAYS. HOW DO YOU REDUCE THE PRESSURE? 594 00:37:10,728 --> 00:37:12,229 LET OFF STEAM, YOU FOOL. 595 00:37:13,231 --> 00:37:14,732 OH, COLONEL. 596 00:37:15,733 --> 00:37:18,736 ( metal crunching ) 597 00:37:34,252 --> 00:37:36,254 OH, DEAR. 598 00:37:36,254 --> 00:37:39,257 THAT WAS HERR FLICK'S CAR. 599 00:37:39,257 --> 00:37:41,259 HERR FLICK OF THE GESTAPO. 600 00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:45,763 IS THERE A PANEL BEATER IN THE TOWN? 601 00:37:57,275 --> 00:38:00,278 WHO HAS SQUASHED MY GESTAPO STAFF CAR? 602 00:38:01,779 --> 00:38:04,281 IT WAS CAPTAIN GEERING, HERR FLICK. 603 00:38:04,282 --> 00:38:05,783 HEIL HITLER. 604 00:38:10,288 --> 00:38:13,291 THIS IS VERY SERIOUS. 605 00:38:13,291 --> 00:38:16,794 THE GESTAPO IS ONLY INSURED THIRD PARTY. 606 00:38:19,297 --> 00:38:22,300 THE CONVOY IS DISAPPEARING, HERR FLICK. 607 00:38:22,300 --> 00:38:24,802 WE WILL HAVE TO TRAVEL ON THIS. 608 00:38:30,308 --> 00:38:32,810 QUICK, FOLLOW THOSE ENGINES. 609 00:38:32,810 --> 00:38:35,312 FULL SPEED AHEAD. 610 00:38:52,063 --> 00:38:54,065 OKAY, CHAPS, OVER HERE. 611 00:38:56,567 --> 00:38:57,568 IN YOU GO. 612 00:38:57,568 --> 00:39:00,571 JOLLY GOOD. ARE YOU GOING TO DRIVE, CARSTAIRS? 613 00:39:00,571 --> 00:39:02,573 OH ALL RIGHT, I'LL HAVE A GO. 614 00:39:05,076 --> 00:39:07,578 IS THERE A HANDBOOK OR ANYTHING? 615 00:39:07,578 --> 00:39:09,079 IT IS QUITE SIMPLE. 616 00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:12,583 THE ELASTIC BRACES ARE TIED ONTO THAT CAR AND HOOKED ROUND THE UNDERCARRIAGE. 617 00:39:12,583 --> 00:39:14,585 WE START YOU UP, THE CAR IS DRIVEN OFF, 618 00:39:14,585 --> 00:39:16,587 WHEN THE BRACES ARE AT FULL STRETCH, 619 00:39:16,587 --> 00:39:18,589 WE PULL AWAY THE CHOCKS AND OFF YOU GO. 620 00:39:18,589 --> 00:39:22,092 - PIECE OF CAKE. - WHERE'S ENGLAND? 621 00:39:22,093 --> 00:39:24,595 WHEN YOU'RE IN THE AIR, TURN RIGHT AND KEEP STRAIGHT ON. 622 00:39:30,101 --> 00:39:32,103 YOU START IT, I WILL DRIVE IT. 623 00:39:32,103 --> 00:39:35,106 DO NOT TALK TO ME WITH A PIPE IN YOUR MOUTH. 624 00:39:41,612 --> 00:39:44,114 MARIA, WHEN I GIVE THE SIGNAL 625 00:39:44,115 --> 00:39:46,617 YOU AND YVETTE WILL PULL AWAY THE CHOCKS. 626 00:39:46,617 --> 00:39:48,118 ROGER. 627 00:39:48,119 --> 00:39:50,621 LISETTE, STAND BY ON THE PROPELLER. 628 00:39:54,125 --> 00:39:55,626 STANDING BY. 629 00:39:55,626 --> 00:39:57,628 SWITCH ON. CONTACT. 630 00:40:03,634 --> 00:40:05,636 PUT YOUR BACK INTO IT, 631 00:40:05,636 --> 00:40:07,137 THEY HAVE STARTED THEIRS ALREADY. 632 00:40:07,138 --> 00:40:09,640 I AM KILLING MYSELF HERE. 633 00:40:09,640 --> 00:40:11,642 SISSY. 634 00:40:11,642 --> 00:40:14,144 YOU HAVE TO FEEL FOR THE COMPRESSION, 635 00:40:14,145 --> 00:40:15,646 HOLD THE CHOKE. 636 00:40:17,148 --> 00:40:20,151 HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT IT ANYWAY? 637 00:40:20,151 --> 00:40:22,653 I USED TO DRIVE ONE OF THESE WHEN I WAS A YOUNG GIRL. 638 00:40:22,653 --> 00:40:26,657 YOU GOT IT FROM THE 1904 MOTOR SHOW, I SUPPOSE. 639 00:40:32,163 --> 00:40:36,167 I AM THE HERO OF THE RESISTANCE, I AM DRIVING. 640 00:40:42,173 --> 00:40:44,175 WE ARE READY! 641 00:40:44,175 --> 00:40:45,676 ALL IS CLEAR. 642 00:40:45,676 --> 00:40:47,177 GOOD LUCK, CHAPS. 643 00:40:47,178 --> 00:40:49,680 - TICKETY-BOO. - BANG ON. 644 00:40:49,680 --> 00:40:53,183 GO, AS FAST AS YOU CAN. 645 00:41:01,692 --> 00:41:05,195 - PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN. - IT IS FLAT ON THE FLOOR. 646 00:41:05,196 --> 00:41:06,697 STAND BY. 647 00:41:06,697 --> 00:41:09,199 - STAND BY. - HERE GOES. 648 00:41:12,203 --> 00:41:14,205 WHY ARE WE SLOWING DOWN? 649 00:41:14,205 --> 00:41:17,208 IT IS THE ELASTIC, IT IS AT FULL STRETCH. 650 00:41:17,208 --> 00:41:19,710 RELEASE THE CHOCKS. 651 00:41:20,711 --> 00:41:22,713 IT IS JAMMED. I CANNOT SHIFT IT. 652 00:41:26,717 --> 00:41:28,218 I CANNOT HOLD IT. 653 00:41:28,219 --> 00:41:30,721 YOU WILL HAVE TO GET OUT AND PUSH. 654 00:41:38,229 --> 00:41:39,230 ( loud crash ) 655 00:41:44,235 --> 00:41:46,237 I THINK THERE HAS BEEN 656 00:41:46,237 --> 00:41:48,239 A RIGHT NOSE-UP. 657 00:41:49,240 --> 00:41:51,742 QUICK, BACK TO THE CAFE. 658 00:42:02,253 --> 00:42:05,756 GOOD, I WILL USE THE SUPERCHARGER. 659 00:42:10,761 --> 00:42:13,764 WE WILL DISAPPEAR LIKE PHANTOMS INTO THE WOODS. 660 00:42:22,773 --> 00:42:24,274 WAIT FOR ME. 661 00:42:33,284 --> 00:42:36,787 ( theme music playing )