1
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Cheers is filmed before
a live studio audience.

2
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I'll tell you, Woody,
the psychiatric profession

3
00:00:08,109 --> 00:00:10,477
can really get rough sometimes.

4
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I think if I hear one
more person telling me

5
00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:14,781
about one more problem, I'll explode.

6
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I know just how you feel, Dr. Crane.

7
00:00:17,151 --> 00:00:18,401
Actually, I suppose you do.

8
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Our professions are
really very much alike.

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We both have to listen patiently

10
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while people unload
their grief and suffering.

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Sometimes it's just
more than I can bear.

12
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I know just how you feel, Dr. Crane.

13
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You know, if only I had
your ability to listen

14
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to a person's problem,
sympathize with them,

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and yet still go on about my
business calmly and happily.

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How do you do it, Wood?

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I know just how you feel, Dr. Crane.

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You're not listening to me, are you?

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I know just how you feel, Dr. Crane.

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How about a double scotch rocks?

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Coming right up.

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? Making your way in the world today?

23
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? Takes everything you've got?

24
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? Taking a break from all your worries?

25
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? Sure would help a lot?

26
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? Wouldn't you like to get away??

27
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? Sometimes you want to go?

28
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? Where everybody knows your name?

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? And they're always glad you came?

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? You want to be where you can see?

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? Our troubles are all the same?

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? You want to be where
everybody knows your name?

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? You want to go where people know?

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? People are all the same?

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? You want to go where
everybody knows your name.?

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All right, here, here it is, troops.

37
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The reason I called
you in was to tell you

38
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I just got a chance
to go up to Moose River

39
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to do some fishing with
some old baseball buddies.

40
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Ah, a fishing trip.

41
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Another desperate

42
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yet futile attempt to forget me.

43
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No, no, just another desperate

44
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yet futile attempt to catch some fish.

45
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The problem is

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I want to leave right now.

47
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So, who wants to be saddled

48
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with taking charge of
the place while I'm gone?

49
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Oh, me, me! I do!

50
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I want to!

51
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Uh, wait a minute here.

52
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Uh, all right, sit down, sit down.

53
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I guess I'm gonna have to make

54
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an executive decision here.

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All right,

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hold out your fists.

57
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There you go.

58
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One potato, two potato,
three potato, four...

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Oh, Sam, Sam, Sam.

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This isn't fair.

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It isn't?

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No... everybody knows
that when you do

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"one potato, two potato"
with three people,

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you end up with the same
person with whom you started.

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Oh, yeah, all right. Uh...

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Oh, I got something else here.

67
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All right, all right.

68
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My dog died last night.

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What color is his blood?

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What kind of disgusting game is that?

71
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It's something I
played when I was a kid.

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Now pick a color.

73
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What for?

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Your dog's blood.

75
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Oh, this is horrible.

76
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You played this as a child?

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Well, no wonder you're so disturbed.

78
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Would you please pick a color

79
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so I can spell it and
knock somebody out?

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All right, mauve.

81
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All right, all right, um...

82
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Here we go, yeah.

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We'll use a bat here.

84
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Good idea.

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Okay, I'm in charge!

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Sam.

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Actually, I, uh, had this is mind.

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Woody, you know how to do this.

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Here you go.

90
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All right, here.

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Oh, oh...

92
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Oh!

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He grabbed the little
knobby thing at the top.

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You can't do that.

95
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That's not part of the bat.

96
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The little knobby
thing is so a part of the bat.

97
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Well, can he grab it?

98
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Sure he can grab it.! Yeah.

99
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And then you and I get three turns

100
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trying to kick it out of his fingers

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and the one who kicks it out wins.

102
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Well, how do we decide who kicks first?

103
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One potato, two potato...

104
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Oh!

105
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You're going to have to make a decision

106
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like a rational adult human being.

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All right, all right.

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Okay, Woody's my man.

109
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Oh! Oh, no!

110
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Come on! Why Woody?

111
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Well, because he's the only person

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who hasn't irritated the hell out of me

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in the last five minutes.

114
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Come on. Get out of here.

115
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Let me, uh, go over some of
the management rules with him.

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Go on, go on.

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I think you're really gonna
enjoy this weekend, boss.

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Okay, first rule...

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keep this with you at all times.

120
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Oh, Woody, here's a letter from Indiana.

121
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Oh, boy!

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It's from my girlfriend, Beth.

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So how are things in the
great Midwest, huh, Woods?

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Well, let's everybody gather
'round and we'll find out, huh?

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Oh, great, let's pull up the stove,

126
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whittle a tetch and chaw some tabacky.

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Boy, Beth writes the
greatest letters in the world.

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I can't wait for you guys to hear this.

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"Dear Woody,

130
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"this is the hardest letter
I've ever had to write.

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"What I have to say is that
I care about you very much,

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"but I'm afraid we can't
stay together anymore.

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"You see, I've fallen in
love with Leonard Twilley

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"and we're flying up to Niagara Falls

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"on the 20th to be married.

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"We're gonna drop by
and see you on our way.

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"I feel I have to explain in person.

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"I hope you understand

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"and find it in your
heart to forgive me.

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See you Saturday. Love, Beth."

141
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Well, this isn't quite as
good as her usual letters.

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I'm so sorry, Woody.

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I can't believe it.

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Beth and Leonard Twilley.

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Woody, today's Saturday, you know.

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Uh, she could be here any minute.

147
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Gosh, I'm feeling kind of bad.

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Listen, if you'll excuse me,

149
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I think I'd like to be alone now.

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Oh, I guess it'd be easier if I left.

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Uh, wait a sec, Wood.

152
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You know, maybe this is really

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a blessing in disguise.

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You see, sometimes in
order to achieve maturity,

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it's necessary to disengage
oneself from relationships

156
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that keep one's growth rooted

157
00:06:46,790 --> 00:06:49,792
in an artificially
prolonged period of stasis.

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I know just how you feel, Dr. Crane.

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Woody, come on.

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Sometimes things work out
for the best, you know?

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Look at it this way.

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Boston's crawling with
beautiful, single women.

163
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Just get on out there.

164
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Yeah, he's right, you know.

165
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Take it from one who knows.

166
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Yeah, but since Sammy's not
here, just take it from us.

167
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Yeah, you know, he
is, uh, right there, Woody.

168
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You know, the best way
to forget about Beth

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is go out there, find some skirt,

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have her, use her and throw her away.

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Maybe you guys are right.

172
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Maybe the best way to get over this

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is to make wild, crazy, passionate love

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to the first available
woman who comes along.

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Woody, don't listen to them.

176
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It's not necessary for you to suppress

177
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your grief in debauchery.

178
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It's important for you to experience it.

179
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People grow from intense suffering.

180
00:07:43,313 --> 00:07:44,680
Yeah? Then how come

181
00:07:44,681 --> 00:07:47,184
I haven't grown an inch
since I've known you?

182
00:07:53,073 --> 00:07:56,325
Oh, boy, Normie, look at this.

183
00:07:56,326 --> 00:07:58,829
Another psychic's head exploded.

184
00:08:02,332 --> 00:08:04,834
Kind of makes you wonder why anyone

185
00:08:04,835 --> 00:08:07,837
goes into that line of work, doesn't it?

186
00:08:07,838 --> 00:08:09,839
Excuse me.

187
00:08:09,840 --> 00:08:12,341
I've been experiencing
grief all afternoon

188
00:08:12,342 --> 00:08:13,843
and instead of killing myself,

189
00:08:13,844 --> 00:08:15,845
I'd like to take you out to dinner.

190
00:08:15,846 --> 00:08:18,347
Sounds great, but no thank you.

191
00:08:18,348 --> 00:08:20,851
Did I say it was my treat?

192
00:08:24,354 --> 00:08:26,856
Woody, you've hit on nearly
every woman in the bar.

193
00:08:26,857 --> 00:08:28,357
Why are you so persistent?

194
00:08:28,358 --> 00:08:30,359
Well, when Beth gets here, you know,

195
00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:32,862
I want to show her that
I got someone else, too.

196
00:08:32,863 --> 00:08:34,363
If there's one thing I can't stand,

197
00:08:34,364 --> 00:08:36,365
it's that look of pity in her eyes.

198
00:08:36,366 --> 00:08:38,368
I'm sure she's far too wrapped up

199
00:08:38,869 --> 00:08:41,872
in her own happiness to
have time to pity you.

200
00:08:43,790 --> 00:08:45,626
Well, that is a comfort.

201
00:08:47,327 --> 00:08:50,246
Hi, Woody.

202
00:08:50,247 --> 00:08:51,248
Oh, hi, Beth.

203
00:08:51,748 --> 00:08:53,249
Hi, Leonard.

204
00:08:53,250 --> 00:08:54,634
Did you get my letter?

205
00:08:54,635 --> 00:08:56,385
Yeah, I got it.

206
00:08:56,386 --> 00:08:57,253
Are you mad?

207
00:08:57,254 --> 00:08:59,221
Oh, no, I'm not mad at all.

208
00:08:59,222 --> 00:09:01,223
You know, you're the
last person in the world

209
00:09:01,224 --> 00:09:02,725
I ever wanted to hurt.

210
00:09:02,726 --> 00:09:04,226
Hey, I'm fine, really.

211
00:09:04,227 --> 00:09:06,228
Can I get you guys something to drink?

212
00:09:06,229 --> 00:09:07,229
Wine.

213
00:09:07,230 --> 00:09:08,731
How 'bout a brewski?

214
00:09:08,732 --> 00:09:09,733
Brewski...

215
00:09:12,736 --> 00:09:15,739
Woody, we didn't mean
for this to happen.

216
00:09:16,239 --> 00:09:18,240
It was fate.

217
00:09:18,241 --> 00:09:20,242
I was in Fryer's Hardware Store

218
00:09:20,243 --> 00:09:22,244
looking at some copper tubing.

219
00:09:22,245 --> 00:09:25,247
Beth was buying a lawn
sprinkler and, well...

220
00:09:25,248 --> 00:09:27,751
I never stood a chance.

221
00:09:29,586 --> 00:09:30,870
Oh, Leonard, I can't stand it.

222
00:09:30,871 --> 00:09:32,371
Look what we've done to him.

223
00:09:32,372 --> 00:09:34,874
I know, it's worse than
I thought it would be.

224
00:09:34,875 --> 00:09:35,875
Oh, please, guys, don't do that.

225
00:09:35,876 --> 00:09:37,877
How can we happily walk down the aisle

226
00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:38,879
knowing we're leaving
him here like this?

227
00:09:39,379 --> 00:09:40,880
I won't be in the mood for any cake.

228
00:09:40,881 --> 00:09:41,881
Beth... Leonard...

229
00:09:41,882 --> 00:09:43,382
I keep getting

230
00:09:43,383 --> 00:09:44,884
this picture of you sitting alone

231
00:09:44,885 --> 00:09:46,385
in your room, night after night,

232
00:09:46,386 --> 00:09:48,387
and it makes me want to cry.

233
00:09:48,388 --> 00:09:49,271
Hi, Beth.

234
00:09:49,272 --> 00:09:50,941
Nice to meet you, Leonard.

235
00:09:52,275 --> 00:09:54,276
Woody, uh, don't you think it's time

236
00:09:54,277 --> 00:09:55,778
to tell Beth about you-know-who?

237
00:09:55,779 --> 00:09:57,279
Who?

238
00:09:57,280 --> 00:09:59,782
Well, that lovely young lady

239
00:09:59,783 --> 00:10:01,650
you've been seeing so much of.

240
00:10:01,651 --> 00:10:02,618
Is this true?

241
00:10:02,619 --> 00:10:03,537
Yes.

242
00:10:05,038 --> 00:10:07,456
Well, I'm glad you found someone, Woody.

243
00:10:07,457 --> 00:10:08,958
What's she like?

244
00:10:08,959 --> 00:10:11,460
Well, uh, uh, she's about four, five,

245
00:10:11,461 --> 00:10:12,461
five, five feet

246
00:10:12,462 --> 00:10:13,963
four or five.

247
00:10:13,964 --> 00:10:15,465
She's kind of hard to describe.

248
00:10:16,967 --> 00:10:19,969
Cornflower blue eyes,

249
00:10:19,970 --> 00:10:22,472
titian hair, Raphaelesque figure.

250
00:10:22,973 --> 00:10:25,841
And she smells good.

251
00:10:25,842 --> 00:10:27,510
I feel so much better

252
00:10:27,511 --> 00:10:29,729
knowing you won't be alone.

253
00:10:29,730 --> 00:10:31,564
Well...

254
00:10:31,565 --> 00:10:33,984
Come on, Leonard. We'd better be going.

255
00:10:36,403 --> 00:10:38,270
It was nice seeing you, Woody.

256
00:10:38,271 --> 00:10:40,606
Bye, Beth.

257
00:10:40,607 --> 00:10:42,024
Good luck.

258
00:10:42,025 --> 00:10:44,276
Yeah, good luck, Beth.

259
00:10:44,277 --> 00:10:47,079
Well, it's too
bad you two had to leave.

260
00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:48,447
I know you would have

261
00:10:48,448 --> 00:10:49,448
enjoyed meeting Woody's girlfriend.

262
00:10:49,449 --> 00:10:50,449
She's extraordinary.

263
00:10:50,450 --> 00:10:51,951
Yeah, we could have had dinner tonight.

264
00:10:51,952 --> 00:10:54,336
Actually our plane doesn't
leave till midnight.

265
00:10:54,337 --> 00:10:55,838
Oh, that's right.

266
00:10:55,839 --> 00:10:58,340
Well, we can all have dinner together.

267
00:10:58,341 --> 00:10:59,759
Oh, great.

268
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:00,760
8:00 okay?

269
00:11:00,761 --> 00:11:02,129
Yeah, fine.

270
00:11:06,550 --> 00:11:07,550
Way to go, Miss Chambers.

271
00:11:07,551 --> 00:11:09,051
What am I gonna do now?

272
00:11:09,052 --> 00:11:10,053
I'm sorry, Woody.

273
00:11:10,554 --> 00:11:11,554
I have a strict rule

274
00:11:11,555 --> 00:11:14,558
about meddling in
other people's affairs.

275
00:11:28,238 --> 00:11:31,958
Why did Miss Chambers have to
shoot my big mouth off for me?

276
00:11:33,910 --> 00:11:36,412
Boy, this is the worst thing
that's ever happened to anybody.

277
00:11:36,413 --> 00:11:38,330
Oh, I don't know about that, Woody.

278
00:11:38,331 --> 00:11:41,334
Uh, did you ever have your head explode?

279
00:11:42,719 --> 00:11:45,588
Woody, as a way of apologizing,

280
00:11:45,589 --> 00:11:47,089
let me try to think

281
00:11:47,090 --> 00:11:49,091
of another way out of this.

282
00:11:49,092 --> 00:11:50,092
Now, let's see.

283
00:11:50,093 --> 00:11:53,479
I'm sure we can think of something.

284
00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:57,266
Well, it better be good,
'cause I need a date quick.

285
00:11:57,267 --> 00:12:00,771
Oh, boy, it's too bad
Sammy's not here to help ya.

286
00:12:01,271 --> 00:12:02,772
Hey, Sammy may not be here,

287
00:12:02,773 --> 00:12:05,274
but his inventory is.

288
00:12:05,275 --> 00:12:06,275
Yeah, Woody.

289
00:12:06,276 --> 00:12:07,276
Oh, hey, hey, hey...

290
00:12:07,277 --> 00:12:08,277
Woody,

291
00:12:08,278 --> 00:12:10,663
put that down on the bar very carefully

292
00:12:10,664 --> 00:12:11,665
and walk away.

293
00:12:14,034 --> 00:12:15,367
Yeah, it's a little bit too hot

294
00:12:15,368 --> 00:12:16,869
for you to handle there, Woodman.

295
00:12:16,870 --> 00:12:17,870
I'll tell ya what I'll do.

296
00:12:17,871 --> 00:12:20,123
I'll give you the number
of one of my tootsies.

297
00:12:21,341 --> 00:12:22,792
I think he'd prefer something

298
00:12:22,793 --> 00:12:23,794
that lives above ground.

299
00:12:27,264 --> 00:12:28,631
Wait a minute.

300
00:12:28,632 --> 00:12:30,466
Do you really think it's proper

301
00:12:30,467 --> 00:12:33,470
to be rifling through
a man's personal papers?

302
00:12:33,970 --> 00:12:36,472
No matter how close a
friend, no matter how...

303
00:12:36,473 --> 00:12:37,723
Miss Chambers, you're in here.

304
00:12:37,724 --> 00:12:40,059
Give me that.

305
00:12:40,060 --> 00:12:41,560
"Diane Chambers.

306
00:12:41,561 --> 00:12:44,063
"Probably the most
incredible woman I ever met.

307
00:12:44,064 --> 00:12:45,564
Don't you agree, Diane?"

308
00:12:45,565 --> 00:12:47,067
Well...

309
00:12:51,538 --> 00:12:52,538
Hey, here's one.

310
00:12:52,539 --> 00:12:53,539
Three stars.

311
00:12:53,540 --> 00:12:55,875
"Tina Wilson.

312
00:12:55,876 --> 00:12:57,827
Fun, sexy, easy."

313
00:12:57,828 --> 00:12:59,830
Well, she sounds interesting.

314
00:13:00,330 --> 00:13:01,831
And you know just what to do

315
00:13:01,832 --> 00:13:03,215
with sweet Tina Wilson.

316
00:13:03,216 --> 00:13:06,502
Have her, use her, and
I'll throw her away.

317
00:13:06,503 --> 00:13:09,305
I don't think you're
going to get an answer.

318
00:13:09,306 --> 00:13:10,756
Why not?

319
00:13:10,757 --> 00:13:13,510
I'm sweet Tina Wilson.

320
00:13:16,179 --> 00:13:18,398
Well, what would be a
good time to call you?

321
00:13:23,019 --> 00:13:24,403
Ah, it's not workin'.

322
00:13:24,404 --> 00:13:25,404
I'm no good at this.

323
00:13:25,405 --> 00:13:27,523
No, no, no, Woody.
Don't give up so easily.

324
00:13:27,524 --> 00:13:29,241
Oh, here's one.

325
00:13:29,242 --> 00:13:32,495
Oh, oh, look at this here,
the ultimate one, too, huh?

326
00:13:32,496 --> 00:13:34,497
She's got a whole page to herself.

327
00:13:34,498 --> 00:13:35,498
Yeah!

328
00:13:35,499 --> 00:13:36,448
"Desiree Harrison."

329
00:13:36,449 --> 00:13:38,450
Oh, look at all those stars.

330
00:13:38,451 --> 00:13:39,952
Yeah, any more stars

331
00:13:39,953 --> 00:13:41,954
you'd have to pledge allegiance to her.

332
00:13:41,955 --> 00:13:42,956
Yeah, hey.

333
00:13:43,456 --> 00:13:45,457
"The best, the best, the best."

334
00:13:45,458 --> 00:13:48,460
Hey, get on the horn there, Woods.

335
00:13:48,461 --> 00:13:50,964
Woody, something tells
me you shouldn't do this.

336
00:13:51,464 --> 00:13:52,464
Please reconsider.

337
00:13:52,465 --> 00:13:54,967
Oh, that's easy for you to
say. You got him into this.

338
00:13:54,968 --> 00:13:56,969
Why don't you do something
extraordinary for once

339
00:13:56,970 --> 00:13:57,854
and butt out?

340
00:14:02,108 --> 00:14:03,275
What do I say to her?

341
00:14:03,276 --> 00:14:06,111
Uh, tell her you're a
friend of Sam Malone.

342
00:14:06,112 --> 00:14:08,364
Good.

343
00:14:08,365 --> 00:14:11,650
Hi, uh, De, Desiree?

344
00:14:11,651 --> 00:14:13,036
Yeah, I'm a friend of Sam Malone.

345
00:14:14,404 --> 00:14:16,789
Hold on. She wants to know why I called.

346
00:14:16,790 --> 00:14:19,041
Tell her that, uh, Sammy
said she was the best.

347
00:14:19,042 --> 00:14:20,910
And you want to find out for yourself.

348
00:14:20,911 --> 00:14:23,879
Oh, good. Uh, yeah,
Sam says you're the best

349
00:14:23,880 --> 00:14:26,383
and I wanna find out for myself.

350
00:14:26,883 --> 00:14:27,384
Hold on.

351
00:14:27,711 --> 00:14:28,751
She wants to know my name.

352
00:14:28,752 --> 00:14:30,219
Wing it.

353
00:14:30,220 --> 00:14:33,222
Yeah, it's Woody Boyd.

354
00:14:33,223 --> 00:14:35,724
Yeah, how about 7:00 tonight?

355
00:14:35,725 --> 00:14:36,976
Yeah?

356
00:14:36,977 --> 00:14:38,310
Okay, uh, well,

357
00:14:38,311 --> 00:14:41,313
I'll see ya here in the bar.

358
00:14:41,314 --> 00:14:42,314
Great. Ha-ha!

359
00:14:42,315 --> 00:14:43,315
All right, Woody!

360
00:14:43,316 --> 00:14:48,188
Well, seein' as how
it's Gomer's night out...

361
00:14:49,823 --> 00:14:52,274
that leaves me in charge of the bar.

362
00:14:52,275 --> 00:14:54,743
Oh, not necessarily.

363
00:14:54,744 --> 00:14:59,081
Woody, who do you assign
to take command of the bar?

364
00:14:59,082 --> 00:15:02,334
Well, I don't know how to
choose between the two of you.

365
00:15:02,335 --> 00:15:04,620
Oh, I know, I know.
We're both your friends.

366
00:15:04,621 --> 00:15:05,621
No, it's not that.

367
00:15:05,622 --> 00:15:07,123
You ruined "one potato, two potato."

368
00:15:08,625 --> 00:15:11,627
Okay, why don't we let the bar decide?

369
00:15:11,628 --> 00:15:13,045
Well, that seems

370
00:15:13,046 --> 00:15:15,015
the fair and democratic thing to do.

371
00:15:16,466 --> 00:15:20,970
We should each make a speech
presenting our best arguments

372
00:15:20,971 --> 00:15:23,472
as to why we should
be in charge of the bar

373
00:15:23,473 --> 00:15:24,974
and we'll leave it up to you.

374
00:15:24,975 --> 00:15:26,976
Carla, the floor is yours,

375
00:15:26,977 --> 00:15:29,479
and not for the first time, I might add.

376
00:15:34,484 --> 00:15:38,989
If I'm elected, no way
will Diane make a speech.

377
00:15:45,245 --> 00:15:46,246
Whoo! Whoo!

378
00:15:52,636 --> 00:15:54,970
Hey, hubba-hubba!

379
00:15:54,971 --> 00:15:56,639
How do I look? Is my tie crooked?

380
00:15:56,640 --> 00:15:58,808
Uh, no, but your pants are on backwards.

381
00:16:00,477 --> 00:16:03,512
Made ya look. Made ya look.

382
00:16:03,513 --> 00:16:04,813
That's very funny, Mr. Clavin,

383
00:16:04,814 --> 00:16:07,317
but I guess I'm not in the
mood for that clever humor.

384
00:16:07,817 --> 00:16:10,319
Yeah, you and the rest of creation.

385
00:16:10,320 --> 00:16:13,272
Yeah, I'm worried about
my date with, uh, Desiree.

386
00:16:13,273 --> 00:16:14,773
She's one of Sam's women.

387
00:16:14,774 --> 00:16:17,160
She may be too much for one man.

388
00:16:20,413 --> 00:16:22,665
Is there somebody here named Woody?

389
00:16:22,666 --> 00:16:23,499
Yeah.

390
00:16:23,500 --> 00:16:25,001
I'm Desiree.

391
00:16:26,870 --> 00:16:28,371
Uh, just a minute, please.

392
00:16:30,057 --> 00:16:31,457
Is it me or does she look different

393
00:16:31,458 --> 00:16:32,842
than she did on the phone?

394
00:16:33,626 --> 00:16:35,594
She comes highly
recommended by the master.

395
00:16:35,595 --> 00:16:37,097
All right, here goes nothin'.

396
00:16:39,015 --> 00:16:40,516
So you're Desiree?

397
00:16:40,517 --> 00:16:41,383
Yeah.

398
00:16:41,384 --> 00:16:43,268
Hi, I'm Woody.

399
00:16:43,269 --> 00:16:45,271
Can I get your coat?

400
00:16:46,523 --> 00:16:48,807
What's she doin' here?

401
00:16:48,808 --> 00:16:50,809
That's Woody's date.

402
00:16:50,810 --> 00:16:53,313
Woody's goin' out with
Sam's cleaning lady?

403
00:16:56,316 --> 00:16:57,316
Cleaning lady?

404
00:16:57,317 --> 00:17:00,320
That's right. Sam says she's the best.

405
00:17:02,822 --> 00:17:04,823
So how are you?

406
00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:05,824
Fine. Shall we get started?

407
00:17:05,825 --> 00:17:07,326
What? Right, right here?

408
00:17:07,327 --> 00:17:09,995
Here or in the back if you prefer.

409
00:17:09,996 --> 00:17:12,331
Well, don't you want any dinner first?

410
00:17:12,332 --> 00:17:13,832
No, I'd like to get right to it.

411
00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:16,218
I'll stop to eat when
I get a little tired.

412
00:17:16,219 --> 00:17:17,503
Wow.

413
00:17:17,504 --> 00:17:19,888
I figure you probably
have your own equipment.

414
00:17:19,889 --> 00:17:21,890
If not, I have mine out in the car.

415
00:17:21,891 --> 00:17:24,393
What sort of equipment?

416
00:17:24,394 --> 00:17:26,395
Well, the first thing
we'll need is a bucket.

417
00:17:26,396 --> 00:17:27,396
Really?

418
00:17:27,397 --> 00:17:29,398
Yeah, and some rubber gloves

419
00:17:29,399 --> 00:17:31,600
and one of those really hard
brushes with a long handle.

420
00:17:34,904 --> 00:17:36,155
You've gotta be kiddin' me.

421
00:17:36,156 --> 00:17:39,491
Well, I need something to get
to those hard-to-reach places.

422
00:17:39,492 --> 00:17:43,495
Would you excuse me
for a moment, please?

423
00:17:43,496 --> 00:17:48,200
Guys, I think there's things
about Sam that we don't know.

424
00:17:48,201 --> 00:17:49,702
No, no, Woody, she's not Sam's date.

425
00:17:50,203 --> 00:17:51,203
She's his maid.

426
00:17:51,204 --> 00:17:52,204
Yeah, Carla told us.

427
00:17:52,205 --> 00:17:53,205
Those stars mean

428
00:17:53,206 --> 00:17:55,208
she's the best housekeeper around.

429
00:17:57,710 --> 00:18:00,712
Oh, boy, do I feel stupid!

430
00:18:00,713 --> 00:18:02,214
What am I gonna do now?

431
00:18:02,215 --> 00:18:04,968
Maybe you should, uh,
tell her the truth.

432
00:18:07,387 --> 00:18:08,087
Yeah, yeah, okay.

433
00:18:12,108 --> 00:18:12,891
Uh, listen, ma'am,

434
00:18:12,892 --> 00:18:14,893
I think there's been a terrible mistake.

435
00:18:14,894 --> 00:18:16,395
I don't think I'm gonna be...

436
00:18:16,396 --> 00:18:17,781
Hi, Woody.

437
00:18:19,149 --> 00:18:21,450
So that's what you call titian hair.

438
00:18:21,451 --> 00:18:22,568
Hi,

439
00:18:22,569 --> 00:18:23,786
I'm Beth.

440
00:18:23,787 --> 00:18:24,953
I'm Desiree.

441
00:18:24,954 --> 00:18:26,789
This is my fiancé, Leonard.

442
00:18:26,790 --> 00:18:28,074
Good.

443
00:18:31,578 --> 00:18:35,080
Yeah, they're gonna be joining us

444
00:18:35,081 --> 00:18:36,582
for dinner tonight.

445
00:18:36,583 --> 00:18:38,083
Dinner?

446
00:18:38,084 --> 00:18:41,086
You wanna take me out to dinner?

447
00:18:41,087 --> 00:18:42,588
Yeah. So what do you say?

448
00:18:42,589 --> 00:18:45,841
Well, it beats scrubbin'
grout with a toothbrush.

449
00:18:45,842 --> 00:18:50,179
You folks and your
big-city expressions.

450
00:18:50,180 --> 00:18:52,681
Yes, I thought we'd eat at Melville's,

451
00:18:52,682 --> 00:18:54,566
if that's okay with you, ma'am.

452
00:18:54,567 --> 00:18:55,435
Okay.

453
00:18:58,438 --> 00:19:01,824
I was expecting someone
a little younger, Woody.

454
00:19:01,825 --> 00:19:02,826
Me, too.

455
00:19:08,748 --> 00:19:10,082
That was fun.

456
00:19:10,083 --> 00:19:11,583
Nice seein' ya.

457
00:19:11,584 --> 00:19:13,085
Listen, have a nice marriage.

458
00:19:13,086 --> 00:19:15,087
Well, didn't somebody mention dancing?

459
00:19:15,088 --> 00:19:16,588
We still have time
before our plane leaves.

460
00:19:16,589 --> 00:19:18,590
Now you want to take me dancing?

461
00:19:18,591 --> 00:19:20,959
It sure beats scrubbin'
grout with a toothbrush.

462
00:19:20,960 --> 00:19:23,879
Hey, I could live here.

463
00:19:23,880 --> 00:19:25,380
Let me go freshen up.

464
00:19:25,381 --> 00:19:29,384
Oh, dancing. I hope my knees hold out.

465
00:19:29,385 --> 00:19:32,771
Is it any wonder I love her?

466
00:19:32,772 --> 00:19:34,139
I like her, Woody.

467
00:19:34,140 --> 00:19:36,141
Yeah, listen, why don't
you two have a seat?

468
00:19:36,142 --> 00:19:37,644
I'll get you somethin' to drink.

469
00:19:45,151 --> 00:19:47,653
Woody...

470
00:19:47,654 --> 00:19:49,655
I know I got you into this,

471
00:19:49,656 --> 00:19:51,657
but it's time to stop.

472
00:19:51,658 --> 00:19:53,158
I know Beth hurt you,

473
00:19:53,159 --> 00:19:55,661
but she doesn't deserve to be lied to.

474
00:19:55,662 --> 00:19:58,164
Besides, would your
mother be proud of you

475
00:19:58,665 --> 00:20:00,667
if she knew what you were doing?

476
00:20:02,168 --> 00:20:04,670
Let Beth know how you feel.

477
00:20:04,671 --> 00:20:07,172
I think it would do you both good.

478
00:20:07,173 --> 00:20:10,175
You're right, Miss Chambers.

479
00:20:10,176 --> 00:20:12,178
I guess I owe Beth that much.

480
00:20:15,732 --> 00:20:20,736
Oh, you won't tell my mother, will you?

481
00:20:20,737 --> 00:20:22,237
Mum's the word.

482
00:20:22,238 --> 00:20:25,742
You won't tell my mum, will you?

483
00:20:35,585 --> 00:20:37,085
Excuse me, uh, Beth, can I talk

484
00:20:37,086 --> 00:20:38,086
to you for a moment?

485
00:20:38,087 --> 00:20:40,089
Sure, Woody. Excuse us, Leonard.

486
00:20:40,590 --> 00:20:43,592
Sure. You're not gonna steal her

487
00:20:43,593 --> 00:20:45,093
back from me, are you, Woody?

488
00:20:45,094 --> 00:20:46,595
Go drink your beer, Leonard.

489
00:20:46,596 --> 00:20:48,598
Yes, dear.

490
00:20:52,101 --> 00:20:54,604
Uh, listen, Beth.

491
00:20:58,608 --> 00:21:00,609
Desiree's not my girlfriend.

492
00:21:00,610 --> 00:21:03,979
Well, I had a feeling.

493
00:21:03,980 --> 00:21:06,365
What gave it away?

494
00:21:06,366 --> 00:21:08,234
When she forgot your name during dinner.

495
00:21:10,153 --> 00:21:11,653
See, I was so hurt,

496
00:21:11,654 --> 00:21:13,405
I, I didn't want you to
think that I was on my own.

497
00:21:13,406 --> 00:21:15,123
I'm sorry.

498
00:21:15,124 --> 00:21:17,909
But you know we couldn't have lasted.

499
00:21:17,910 --> 00:21:19,411
We've grown apart.

500
00:21:19,412 --> 00:21:21,797
We're just too different now.

501
00:21:21,798 --> 00:21:24,299
You're the adventurous type.

502
00:21:24,300 --> 00:21:25,801
I just want to settle down.

503
00:21:25,802 --> 00:21:28,170
I love you, Beth.

504
00:21:28,171 --> 00:21:31,473
I love you, too, Woody.

505
00:21:31,474 --> 00:21:35,344
Leonard's more a part of my world.

506
00:21:35,345 --> 00:21:37,346
Well, maybe I could
move back to Indiana.

507
00:21:37,347 --> 00:21:39,264
Do you want to do that?

508
00:21:39,265 --> 00:21:41,266
No.

509
00:21:41,267 --> 00:21:44,269
And I could never live in Boston, so...

510
00:21:44,270 --> 00:21:47,155
how does that leave us?

511
00:21:47,156 --> 00:21:49,775
Real sad.

512
00:21:49,776 --> 00:21:51,493
Yeah.

513
00:21:51,494 --> 00:21:53,328
Well, I hope you get happy.

514
00:21:53,329 --> 00:21:57,249
There's, uh, something
I want to give you.

515
00:21:57,250 --> 00:21:58,250
Oh, no, it's okay.

516
00:21:58,251 --> 00:21:59,751
The drinks are on me.

517
00:21:59,752 --> 00:22:00,752
No.

518
00:22:00,753 --> 00:22:02,255
I meant this.

519
00:22:06,626 --> 00:22:08,127
Good-bye, Woody.

520
00:22:09,379 --> 00:22:13,716
That, Leonard, is, uh,
how the tractor was born.

521
00:22:18,221 --> 00:22:20,522
Come on, Leonard. We
have a plane to catch.

522
00:22:20,523 --> 00:22:23,975
Okay. Well, good-bye.

523
00:22:23,976 --> 00:22:25,977
You guys ever find
yourselves in Indiana,

524
00:22:25,978 --> 00:22:26,978
you know what to do.

525
00:22:26,979 --> 00:22:30,733
Yeah, run screamin' to the airport.

526
00:22:33,069 --> 00:22:34,453
See ya, Woody.

527
00:22:34,454 --> 00:22:35,787
Bye, Leonard.

528
00:22:35,788 --> 00:22:36,788
You take care of her.

529
00:22:36,789 --> 00:22:38,040
I will.

530
00:22:38,041 --> 00:22:39,826
You better.

531
00:22:46,215 --> 00:22:48,217
Are you okay, Woody?

532
00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:53,221
Well, I feel pretty bad.

533
00:22:53,222 --> 00:22:55,223
It hurts, but at least it's settled.

534
00:22:55,224 --> 00:22:57,726
Now I can go back to
bein' Woody Boyd again.

535
00:22:57,727 --> 00:22:58,727
Oh, hey, Woody Boyd,

536
00:22:58,728 --> 00:23:01,230
what about Mrs. Clean in the back there?

537
00:23:03,232 --> 00:23:04,099
Come on, you guys.

538
00:23:04,100 --> 00:23:04,850
Take it easy.

539
00:23:04,851 --> 00:23:06,852
She happens to be a very nice lady.

540
00:23:06,853 --> 00:23:08,737
We had a good time tonight.

541
00:23:08,738 --> 00:23:11,106
She talked about all kinds
of interesting things:

542
00:23:11,107 --> 00:23:12,491
Movies, sports...

543
00:23:12,492 --> 00:23:14,012
How to get cat hair out of the drapes.

544
00:23:18,948 --> 00:23:21,450
Good-bye, Woody.

545
00:23:21,451 --> 00:23:23,952
Uh, no, Desiree, please, don't go.

546
00:23:23,953 --> 00:23:25,454
I'm not stupid.

547
00:23:25,455 --> 00:23:28,457
Don't pay any attention to them.

548
00:23:28,458 --> 00:23:31,960
Look, I'm not exactly sure
what happened here tonight.

549
00:23:31,961 --> 00:23:32,961
Something tells me

550
00:23:32,962 --> 00:23:34,463
you got trapped into this.

551
00:23:34,464 --> 00:23:35,964
So I'm gonna let you off the hook.

552
00:23:35,965 --> 00:23:36,965
Now, look,

553
00:23:36,966 --> 00:23:38,967
when, when I talked
to you earlier today,

554
00:23:38,968 --> 00:23:40,969
I admit I thought you
were somebody else.

555
00:23:40,970 --> 00:23:42,471
But I had fun tonight.

556
00:23:42,472 --> 00:23:43,472
I like you.

557
00:23:43,473 --> 00:23:47,859
I guess what I'm tryin' to say is

558
00:23:47,860 --> 00:23:51,147
I need somebody to talk to.

559
00:23:52,648 --> 00:23:54,032
What'd you have in mind?

560
00:23:54,033 --> 00:23:54,983
I don't know.

561
00:23:54,984 --> 00:23:58,237
I, uh, thought maybe a cup of coffee.

562
00:24:00,072 --> 00:24:01,073
Sure. Why not?

563
00:24:02,041 --> 00:24:03,542
This isn't gonna turn

564
00:24:03,543 --> 00:24:07,045
into one of those
May/December romances, is it?

565
00:24:07,046 --> 00:24:08,547
Well, with the holidays comin' up,

566
00:24:08,548 --> 00:24:10,917
December's no good, but May's okay.