1 00:00:35,890 --> 00:00:44,330 Cabbage Soup 2 00:01:51,690 --> 00:01:54,930 The village was a village of the Bourbonnais. 3 00:01:55,770 --> 00:02:02,850 As this discrete Bourbonnais hadn't carved for itself a war name in history, like Alsace or Lorraine, 4 00:02:03,090 --> 00:02:05,890 it was mistaken, for instance, for Burgundy 5 00:02:06,450 --> 00:02:09,330 just as, long ago, Piraeus (Greek port) was mistaken for a man, 6 00:02:09,730 --> 00:02:12,490 and my aunt's pendants for my uncle's. 7 00:02:12,890 --> 00:02:16,210 In short, the village was the worse for it. 8 00:02:16,770 --> 00:02:18,850 To put it bluntly, back on white, 9 00:02:19,050 --> 00:02:22,410 there was nothing left in the village, less than nothing. 10 00:02:22,730 --> 00:02:23,530 Or, rather, yes... 11 00:02:24,130 --> 00:02:26,128 There still survived, by hook or by crook, 12 00:02:26,129 --> 00:02:27,570 in the hamlet of Les Gourdiflots, 13 00:02:28,530 --> 00:02:32,249 two exotics, two fossils from the dawn of time, 14 00:02:32,250 --> 00:02:33,730 two pathetic creatures. 15 00:02:35,370 --> 00:02:37,530 The first of these Last of the Mohicans, 16 00:02:37,770 --> 00:02:41,649 of these tanned, wine-soaked dried fruits, 17 00:02:41,650 --> 00:02:44,450 of these curiosities from another time, 18 00:02:45,090 --> 00:02:49,250 rejected by technology and even the combustion engine, 19 00:02:49,930 --> 00:02:52,810 the first, then, of these two Druids of the wine goblet 20 00:02:53,130 --> 00:02:55,090 was called Francis Chérasse, 21 00:02:55,650 --> 00:02:56,890 nicknamed Le Bombé (the bulgy one) 22 00:02:57,250 --> 00:03:01,090 for the hunch that endowed his features. 23 00:03:02,730 --> 00:03:05,130 The second one was Claude Ratinier -- 24 00:03:05,650 --> 00:03:07,690 Le Glaude, as he was called in the neighborhood. 25 00:03:08,210 --> 00:03:09,610 Le Glaude with a G. 26 00:03:11,770 --> 00:03:13,088 No, I don't want any, I don't want any... 27 00:03:13,089 --> 00:03:14,168 It's only a fly... 28 00:03:14,169 --> 00:03:15,568 If you're afraid it'll plug up your ass... 29 00:03:15,569 --> 00:03:16,690 I don't care about the fly... 30 00:03:17,090 --> 00:03:19,690 even flies would do me less harm than wine, with what I've got! 31 00:03:19,890 --> 00:03:21,170 What have you got since yesterday? 32 00:03:22,610 --> 00:03:23,690 Well? What? 33 00:03:24,330 --> 00:03:25,208 I have diabetes 34 00:03:25,209 --> 00:03:26,610 How did you find out? 35 00:03:26,611 --> 00:03:27,530 In the paper 36 00:03:27,650 --> 00:03:29,450 They talk about your diabetes in "The Mountain"? 37 00:03:29,530 --> 00:03:31,930 No, my lad, they talk about it in general in an article 38 00:03:32,170 --> 00:03:34,490 but there's some particular in that general... 39 00:03:34,690 --> 00:03:35,689 So what? 40 00:03:35,690 --> 00:03:36,690 What d'you mean, so what!! 41 00:03:36,810 --> 00:03:38,770 My Aunt Augustine, who had diabetes in every corner, 42 00:03:38,810 --> 00:03:40,050 they took out one of her eyes... 43 00:03:41,570 --> 00:03:42,530 ...she died. 44 00:03:42,610 --> 00:03:45,328 My first cousin, Benoît Clou, he was tiny, like this... 45 00:03:45,329 --> 00:03:47,368 he was big, fat, broad, strong, like that... 46 00:03:47,369 --> 00:03:49,328 well, he too got lucky with diabetes! 47 00:03:49,329 --> 00:03:50,330 So they took out an eye... 48 00:03:53,090 --> 00:03:53,728 ...he died. 49 00:03:53,729 --> 00:03:55,850 So, for me, 1+1, that makes... two. 50 00:03:56,050 --> 00:03:57,850 Well, confidence for confidence... 51 00:03:58,490 --> 00:04:01,689 I have two uncles who died back in 1914... 52 00:04:01,690 --> 00:04:02,690 Really? 53 00:04:02,770 --> 00:04:04,490 ...that'll never happen to me! So drink! 54 00:04:04,810 --> 00:04:05,648 Come on...Drink up! Drink up! 55 00:04:05,649 --> 00:04:06,730 I mustn't drink anymore... 56 00:04:06,731 --> 00:04:09,570 Never...never, I'm off to the doctor. 57 00:04:11,890 --> 00:04:14,570 Well...that's not the end of it... 58 00:04:21,930 --> 00:04:24,450 You can have one glassful, Mr. Ratinier... 59 00:04:25,250 --> 00:04:26,370 Per meal? 60 00:04:26,490 --> 00:04:28,090 Oh no! Per day!! 61 00:04:30,250 --> 00:04:32,410 How much have you been drinking everyday? 62 00:04:32,970 --> 00:04:35,570 I don't know...5 or 6 liters... like Le Bombé! 63 00:04:35,571 --> 00:04:37,250 What? You're crazy! 64 00:04:44,970 --> 00:04:46,770 I should never have read this paper... 65 00:04:46,810 --> 00:04:49,370 Anyway, we knew it's just lies in the papers... 66 00:04:49,450 --> 00:04:52,130 ...bullshit from politicians just to upset people... 67 00:04:56,890 --> 00:05:01,490 Well, with all that, old man, you've made me late... 68 00:05:02,690 --> 00:05:04,250 The hour is the hour... 69 00:05:05,690 --> 00:05:08,090 ...and... it's the hour of the "perniflard"... 70 00:05:10,330 --> 00:05:12,770 I'm going to pour myself a wee drop... 71 00:05:14,290 --> 00:05:16,490 if the smell doesn't bother you, with your diet... 72 00:05:51,330 --> 00:05:55,410 Hey, "Le Glaude"... my water, without boasting... 73 00:05:56,010 --> 00:06:01,730 it's the best around here... for soup...and for the "perniflard"! 74 00:06:02,850 --> 00:06:06,490 There is underneath a phreatic layer... 75 00:06:06,930 --> 00:06:08,650 there's nothing like it in the whole region... 76 00:06:09,970 --> 00:06:13,130 When I think you got rid of your well for tap water... 77 00:06:13,330 --> 00:06:15,170 ...I want to crawl out of my pants in reverse! 78 00:06:15,370 --> 00:06:17,650 But you know perfectly well that my Francine wanted it on the sink... 79 00:06:17,730 --> 00:06:20,010 Women, they need the latest modern comforts these days... 80 00:06:20,050 --> 00:06:22,450 Ah...they even want equality, those females... 81 00:06:23,010 --> 00:06:24,568 They'll be cute, their little boys... 82 00:06:24,569 --> 00:06:26,008 ...if they create them all by themselves... 83 00:06:26,009 --> 00:06:27,330 with all kind of shots somewhere... 84 00:06:28,730 --> 00:06:30,488 They'll be giving birth to seahorses... 85 00:06:30,489 --> 00:06:31,890 like those found in puddles... 86 00:06:32,930 --> 00:06:34,170 or to diabetics... 87 00:06:36,250 --> 00:06:36,850 El Glaude... 88 00:06:37,050 --> 00:06:38,050 El Glaude... 89 00:06:39,130 --> 00:06:39,930 El Glaude... 90 00:06:40,970 --> 00:06:41,770 My water... 91 00:06:42,850 --> 00:06:45,410 it has a temperature of great precision... 92 00:06:45,730 --> 00:06:46,890 for the "perniflard"... 93 00:06:48,250 --> 00:06:49,330 within 1 degree... 94 00:06:50,890 --> 00:06:52,890 If it's icy cold, it slices through your stomach... 95 00:06:53,490 --> 00:06:56,490 but this one...it slides down your guts... 96 00:06:56,650 --> 00:06:59,570 like the morning dew on the leaves...look! 97 00:07:00,770 --> 00:07:01,730 Take a look... 98 00:07:04,330 --> 00:07:05,730 Oh, that was good, my Glaude... 99 00:07:06,250 --> 00:07:07,250 Look! 100 00:07:34,690 --> 00:07:37,570 I say, my Bombé, it's still in our little corner, 101 00:07:37,690 --> 00:07:38,730 far from evil-doers, 102 00:07:39,050 --> 00:07:42,330 that we can best wait for death. 103 00:07:42,970 --> 00:07:44,730 I, for one, will never end up in an old-age home 104 00:07:45,050 --> 00:07:46,570 I'd rather drown in my own well 105 00:07:46,490 --> 00:07:48,210 like any true well-digger should! 106 00:07:48,570 --> 00:07:51,530 That's it, and I should club myself to death on the head with a shoe, 107 00:07:51,410 --> 00:07:53,490 like all true shoemakers should! Nonsense! 108 00:08:37,730 --> 00:08:39,290 It's unbearable... 109 00:08:40,370 --> 00:08:41,730 We need a change of air! 110 00:08:46,490 --> 00:08:48,570 Oh maman...oh mon Gla... 111 00:08:48,970 --> 00:08:49,930 I'm being poisoned! 112 00:08:50,290 --> 00:08:53,130 What's going on inside!...Oh mon Gla! 113 00:09:01,410 --> 00:09:04,650 Oh...this one I danced over and over with Francine! 114 00:09:05,170 --> 00:09:08,050 Light as a butterfly was she, the poor little child... 115 00:09:08,770 --> 00:09:10,530 when we danced on Saint-Hyppolite's day... 116 00:09:11,050 --> 00:09:12,810 or on St. Peter's or our Lady's day... 117 00:09:13,330 --> 00:09:16,370 everywhere...only parties and dancing! 118 00:09:21,890 --> 00:09:24,490 Now, my Cicisse...no more waltzes... 119 00:09:24,650 --> 00:09:27,250 only two knights, as stupid as the moon... 120 00:09:27,450 --> 00:09:28,530 under the moon! 121 00:09:30,170 --> 00:09:31,330 You're not going to start crying... 122 00:09:31,570 --> 00:09:33,610 you...old chimpanzee... 123 00:09:34,170 --> 00:09:36,210 But I miss her, my Francine... 124 00:09:36,570 --> 00:09:39,770 What do you want...women only happen to the living... 125 00:09:41,970 --> 00:09:42,850 Take a look! 126 00:09:44,170 --> 00:09:46,130 They're really beautiful, the stars! 127 00:09:46,370 --> 00:09:48,650 They say there are millions and millions and millions... 128 00:09:48,730 --> 00:09:49,730 Just listen to this! 129 00:09:49,810 --> 00:09:50,890 Just listen to this! 130 00:12:47,770 --> 00:12:49,170 Come on, get in! 131 00:12:53,170 --> 00:12:54,370 What brings you here? 132 00:12:55,330 --> 00:12:56,410 Hey, Le Glaude... 133 00:12:56,570 --> 00:12:57,490 Get up! 134 00:12:58,010 --> 00:12:58,810 Come and see! 135 00:12:59,450 --> 00:13:01,450 There's a flying saucer in your field! 136 00:13:03,210 --> 00:13:04,130 What have you done? 137 00:13:04,290 --> 00:13:06,250 What terrible thing have you done? 138 00:13:08,610 --> 00:13:10,930 You've murdered him, you accursed assassin! 139 00:13:11,570 --> 00:13:13,570 You've massacred my best friend! 140 00:13:17,850 --> 00:13:18,930 He's asleep! 141 00:13:25,970 --> 00:13:28,250 But why did you come here, to my home... 142 00:13:28,450 --> 00:13:29,530 and not somewhere else? 143 00:13:31,730 --> 00:13:33,890 But if you don't tell me... 144 00:13:33,930 --> 00:13:36,090 I'll never know where you've escaped from... 145 00:13:36,130 --> 00:13:38,330 you old Denrée (foodstuff)? 146 00:14:12,210 --> 00:14:14,050 ...they're really beautiful, the stars! 147 00:14:13,930 --> 00:14:16,448 ...they say there are millions and millions and millions 148 00:14:16,449 --> 00:14:18,650 ...just listen to this!...just listen to this! 149 00:14:30,450 --> 00:14:32,010 It's me and Le Bombé! 150 00:14:33,410 --> 00:14:35,130 You've heard us fart from up there? 151 00:14:38,050 --> 00:14:40,370 But what did you think...that we were calling you? 152 00:14:43,330 --> 00:14:44,490 Really? 153 00:14:46,490 --> 00:14:48,888 Well, if you can't fart under the stars anymore without a Martian falling on your head... 154 00:14:48,889 --> 00:14:51,170 ...they'll be arriving by the wagonfuls! 155 00:14:51,570 --> 00:14:53,290 Sacré nom di Diou! 156 00:14:53,410 --> 00:14:56,570 You've given me a terrible thirst with all your antics! 157 00:15:22,450 --> 00:15:25,610 Well, old Denrée, we're in France...bottoms up!...hop! 158 00:15:26,610 --> 00:15:27,210 Come on! 159 00:15:28,490 --> 00:15:30,370 You don't like wine?...Your loss! 160 00:15:36,330 --> 00:15:39,210 Now excuse me, pal... if it's only when we burp or fart... 161 00:15:39,290 --> 00:15:41,170 that you understand us, we won't be chatting much! 162 00:15:41,490 --> 00:15:43,930 First of all, Le Bombé and I only fart outside... 163 00:15:44,050 --> 00:15:44,930 ...we have manners... 164 00:15:45,170 --> 00:15:46,570 We've been to restaurants! 165 00:15:48,850 --> 00:15:50,850 But wait a minute!...you're not thirsty... 166 00:15:51,290 --> 00:15:53,530 You're dying of hunger and you're ashamed to ask! Let's go! 167 00:15:54,850 --> 00:15:56,729 Look! This is cabbage soup! 168 00:15:56,730 --> 00:15:57,530 The real thing! 169 00:15:57,570 --> 00:15:59,250 Made with my own cabbage... 170 00:15:59,410 --> 00:16:02,450 ...a spring variety: the "hasty bacalan"! 171 00:16:08,130 --> 00:16:09,450 My lad, let's dig in! 172 00:16:16,210 --> 00:16:20,050 Now we wait a little, till it soaks up the broth... 173 00:16:43,410 --> 00:16:45,210 Never a dull moment with you, La Denrée! 174 00:16:45,290 --> 00:16:47,970 When I fart, you land on us from God knows where... 175 00:16:48,050 --> 00:16:50,170 and when I smoke, you crash on the floor! 176 00:16:50,171 --> 00:16:51,010 Come on! 177 00:17:07,170 --> 00:17:10,410 My cabbage soup, laddie, perfumes your innards... 178 00:17:10,570 --> 00:17:12,768 ...makes you feel good along every inch of your guts... 179 00:17:12,769 --> 00:17:13,610 It sticks to the body... 180 00:17:13,810 --> 00:17:16,490 ...it even does nice things to the head! 181 00:17:16,730 --> 00:17:18,890 Shall I tell you? It makes you a better person! 182 00:17:51,970 --> 00:17:55,170 OK, buddy, you're all set for the road! Let's go! 183 00:18:00,570 --> 00:18:02,410 Ah...you want to take some away? 184 00:18:02,810 --> 00:18:04,490 That's very easy, come along! 185 00:18:14,890 --> 00:18:18,330 See... with this you can go for miles without losing a drop! 186 00:18:38,490 --> 00:18:39,970 Cabbage soup! 187 00:18:40,890 --> 00:18:43,530 Cabbage soup, my laddie! 188 00:19:04,570 --> 00:19:06,650 I'll step out with you... 189 00:19:13,450 --> 00:19:14,290 Let's go... 190 00:19:35,010 --> 00:19:37,490 So that's it, my old Denrée... 191 00:19:37,610 --> 00:19:38,650 Bon voyage! 192 00:19:42,130 --> 00:19:43,370 Shake hands! 193 00:19:46,130 --> 00:19:47,210 Shake hands... 194 00:19:46,970 --> 00:19:48,730 That's it...like this...like this... 195 00:19:50,370 --> 00:19:53,090 And come back soon, La Denrée, you're a good guy! 196 00:20:25,130 --> 00:20:27,690 El Glaude! There's a flying saucer in your field! 197 00:20:27,770 --> 00:20:30,330 El Glaude! There's a flying saucer in your field! 198 00:20:30,331 --> 00:20:31,930 Don't scream like that! 199 00:20:32,090 --> 00:20:35,930 I'm telling you...there's a saucer...There! In your field! 200 00:20:36,370 --> 00:20:38,930 What's with your saucer? First, what saucer? 201 00:20:39,010 --> 00:20:40,610 Flying...a flying saucer! 202 00:20:40,930 --> 00:20:42,930 You've never heard of flying saucers? 203 00:20:43,010 --> 00:20:44,330 But they don't exist, flying saucers! 204 00:20:44,250 --> 00:20:45,410 How much do you bet...1 liter? 205 00:20:45,330 --> 00:20:45,889 Three! 206 00:20:45,890 --> 00:20:47,210 Three! You said three liters! Bet's on! 207 00:20:47,250 --> 00:20:47,970 Three liters! 208 00:20:47,971 --> 00:20:49,530 I had to pee... 209 00:20:49,650 --> 00:20:51,850 It was warm, so I said to myself: go pee outside... 210 00:20:52,090 --> 00:20:53,410 ...it'll be a change from the potty... 211 00:20:53,490 --> 00:20:55,288 I step out and I see a saucer... 212 00:20:55,289 --> 00:20:56,290 there, in your field! 213 00:20:56,690 --> 00:20:58,530 I couldn't pee anymore and I ran to warn you. 214 00:21:04,450 --> 00:21:05,570 Where is it, your saucer? 215 00:21:08,730 --> 00:21:09,810 So, show it to me... 216 00:21:14,210 --> 00:21:15,330 It's gone... 217 00:21:20,610 --> 00:21:22,730 You had a nightmare...it happens... 218 00:21:23,450 --> 00:21:24,690 What did you eat for supper yesterday? 219 00:21:25,050 --> 00:21:25,970 Pig's foot... 220 00:21:27,130 --> 00:21:29,330 Nothing heavier on the stomach! 221 00:21:29,570 --> 00:21:32,730 So...your flying saucer...pig's foot! 222 00:21:38,490 --> 00:21:41,930 It was...it was white as chrome... 223 00:21:42,810 --> 00:21:45,130 ...at least 3 to 4 meters wide...it... 224 00:21:45,570 --> 00:21:47,610 ...was round like cow's cheese... 225 00:21:48,450 --> 00:21:50,730 ...it was beautiful...like a female's tit... 226 00:21:51,170 --> 00:21:52,450 It was right here... 227 00:21:56,210 --> 00:21:57,490 What are you looking for? 228 00:21:57,530 --> 00:21:59,970 What did you find?... Want a teeny-weeny spade? 229 00:22:00,050 --> 00:22:03,410 Merde! It was here, I'll never forget, it was here! 230 00:22:03,450 --> 00:22:04,690 Here, here,here! 231 00:22:04,730 --> 00:22:06,890 My little Cicisse, you drink too much! 232 00:22:06,891 --> 00:22:07,849 Go to hell! 233 00:22:07,850 --> 00:22:09,448 First you see saucers... 234 00:22:09,449 --> 00:22:12,250 and you end up seeing rats all over your bedspread! 235 00:22:12,450 --> 00:22:14,650 Go to hell, I'm telling you, I didn't have a drop more than usual! 236 00:22:14,770 --> 00:22:16,690 That's it! I'm going back to bed! 237 00:22:17,810 --> 00:22:19,850 I won't spend the night galloping after Martians! 238 00:22:21,930 --> 00:22:22,850 Merde! 239 00:22:26,610 --> 00:22:29,010 And don't forget you owe me 3 liters! 240 00:22:29,490 --> 00:22:32,410 3 liters of piss...3 liters of piss you'll get! 241 00:22:37,330 --> 00:22:38,530 Last night... 242 00:22:39,490 --> 00:22:40,810 ...around 1 a.m... 243 00:22:41,810 --> 00:22:43,610 ...I felt a pressing need... 244 00:22:43,690 --> 00:22:44,690 and I... 245 00:22:44,890 --> 00:22:46,410 I stepped outside... 246 00:22:47,770 --> 00:22:48,770 and I saw... 247 00:22:48,850 --> 00:22:50,250 ...a flying saucer! 248 00:22:54,850 --> 00:22:55,730 Excuse me... 249 00:23:00,370 --> 00:23:03,090 I'm Mrs. Poulangeard's brother... 250 00:23:03,570 --> 00:23:09,130 I'm asking you not to believe one word of her flying saucer story... 251 00:23:09,570 --> 00:23:11,770 She's crazy inside out! 252 00:23:11,890 --> 00:23:13,370 Is that so? 253 00:23:15,010 --> 00:23:16,690 Thank you! 254 00:23:19,570 --> 00:23:21,970 Well...we're going to take down your statement... 255 00:23:22,970 --> 00:23:23,490 Hi, buddy... 256 00:23:25,370 --> 00:23:26,330 He's in, the Chief? 257 00:23:26,370 --> 00:23:27,490 One minute, he's busy. 258 00:23:28,010 --> 00:23:28,930 It won't be too long? 259 00:23:58,250 --> 00:23:59,650 I'm taking down your statement... 260 00:24:00,250 --> 00:24:02,370 Last night...aroud 1 a.m... 261 00:24:02,770 --> 00:24:04,170 ...I felt a pressing need... 262 00:24:04,770 --> 00:24:05,930 Is that so? 263 00:24:06,810 --> 00:24:08,770 And...and you saw a flying saucer... 264 00:24:08,771 --> 00:24:09,730 Well, yes... 265 00:24:11,410 --> 00:24:15,890 Last night, at 1 a.m., a resident of Les Gourdiflots, Mrs. Amelie Poulangeard... 266 00:24:16,810 --> 00:24:20,170 ...who felt a pressing need...stepped out of her home... 267 00:24:20,410 --> 00:24:22,330 and saw a flying saucer... 268 00:24:22,370 --> 00:24:24,650 Oh, good, she's crazy to the bone! 269 00:24:24,890 --> 00:24:26,170 Precisely!... 270 00:24:26,250 --> 00:24:27,970 If a simpleton sees a flying saucer... 271 00:24:28,530 --> 00:24:30,890 it is quite evident that, a few meters away... 272 00:24:31,050 --> 00:24:35,249 a certified drunk... will be sure to see one too... 273 00:24:35,250 --> 00:24:36,370 ...of those saucers!... 274 00:24:37,690 --> 00:24:41,410 Well...go on, you're dismissed...Mr. Chérasse! 275 00:24:41,890 --> 00:24:42,970 Ah, nom de Dieu! 276 00:24:43,290 --> 00:24:44,730 Ah, nom di Diou, for sure... 277 00:25:30,410 --> 00:25:33,730 Well then, old man, they say you've seen a flying saucer...? 278 00:25:33,810 --> 00:25:34,930 Of course I saw it! 279 00:25:35,130 --> 00:25:35,970 Sure, I saw it... 280 00:25:36,250 --> 00:25:36,970 Oh yes! 281 00:25:37,130 --> 00:25:39,530 Did it have stripes or dots? 282 00:25:41,690 --> 00:25:42,888 It...it was polished... 283 00:25:42,889 --> 00:25:45,570 Oh sure! Too polished to be honest...! (French saying) 284 00:25:47,210 --> 00:25:50,290 It was smooth...like a Champagne bucket... 285 00:25:51,250 --> 00:25:52,610 Oh...just get off my back! 286 00:26:42,090 --> 00:26:44,130 It's for you, my Francine, a beautiful geranium... 287 00:26:45,210 --> 00:26:46,808 Well, apart from that, no news... 288 00:26:46,809 --> 00:26:48,210 ...What could be new? 289 00:26:49,090 --> 00:26:51,170 When things aren't OK, you've got to cope... 290 00:26:51,171 --> 00:26:53,770 Aah...a Martian dropped in... 291 00:26:54,210 --> 00:26:57,770 No, not a drop...I did drink...I didn't drink at all, I swear! 292 00:26:57,930 --> 00:27:00,408 Ever since you passed away, I haven't had a single "canon" (glass of wine)... 293 00:27:00,409 --> 00:27:02,930 and for the "pern...",well...I'll...OK...good... 294 00:27:03,650 --> 00:27:06,410 OK, listen... see you one of these mornings and have fun! 295 00:27:07,570 --> 00:27:08,890 ...have fun! 296 00:27:18,370 --> 00:27:20,170 Can't you think about anything else? 297 00:27:20,210 --> 00:27:21,370 No! 298 00:27:21,450 --> 00:27:23,409 It's eating you, eh? 299 00:27:23,410 --> 00:27:24,570 Sure it's eating me! 300 00:27:25,130 --> 00:27:27,048 I look like an asshole all over Jaligny! 301 00:27:27,049 --> 00:27:28,488 You always looked like one! 302 00:27:28,489 --> 00:27:30,210 Could be, but now they have reasons... 303 00:27:30,730 --> 00:27:32,608 Shall I tell them that I saw the saucer too... 304 00:27:32,609 --> 00:27:34,490 so that we'll both look like morons! 305 00:27:34,610 --> 00:27:36,048 Oh, you're a good guy, but it's a waste of time... 306 00:27:36,049 --> 00:27:37,168 Come on, have a "canon"! 307 00:27:37,169 --> 00:27:38,608 All right, then I'll hang myself! 308 00:27:38,609 --> 00:27:39,810 You're not going to hang yourself! 309 00:27:40,010 --> 00:27:42,568 My Lulu, better death than dishonor... 310 00:27:42,569 --> 00:27:44,050 You have no right to terminate yourself, Francis! 311 00:27:44,930 --> 00:27:47,210 It's the first time you use my first name... 312 00:27:47,170 --> 00:27:49,090 You have family, neighbors, friends... 313 00:27:49,091 --> 00:27:51,369 I am all of those all by myself! 314 00:27:51,370 --> 00:27:52,370 Ah, you think only of yourself! 315 00:27:53,530 --> 00:27:55,970 I'm going through hell and you don't give a damn! 316 00:27:55,930 --> 00:27:59,330 What you want is for me to be your buffoon, your slave, 317 00:27:59,730 --> 00:28:02,090 so you can make fun of my hump, because I saw a saucer... 318 00:28:02,130 --> 00:28:03,250 Come on, let's have a "canon"! 319 00:28:03,251 --> 00:28:04,530 I'm not thirsty! 320 00:28:12,610 --> 00:28:13,890 I want to be left alone! 321 00:29:35,970 --> 00:29:37,050 Le Bombé! 322 00:29:37,770 --> 00:29:38,770 Le Bombé! 323 00:29:39,610 --> 00:29:40,850 What are you up to? 324 00:29:46,850 --> 00:29:48,010 Le Bombé! 325 00:30:06,250 --> 00:30:07,850 You could answer when I call... 326 00:30:10,570 --> 00:30:12,090 It's to make you worry... 327 00:30:12,970 --> 00:30:16,490 you thought I was black as a lump of coal, hanging from a rope... 328 00:30:16,690 --> 00:30:19,930 You ought to be slapped, you phony... 329 00:30:20,610 --> 00:30:21,810 You'd hit me, wouldn't you...?! 330 00:30:22,010 --> 00:30:22,930 Don't you worry... 331 00:30:22,970 --> 00:30:25,770 You would beat me up, like the gendarmes did... 332 00:30:27,050 --> 00:30:28,450 They beat you up, the gendarmes? 333 00:30:28,610 --> 00:30:29,730 Like a punching-ball... 334 00:30:31,730 --> 00:30:33,570 You know they beat up everybody, the gendarmes... 335 00:30:33,970 --> 00:30:35,050 I...I didn't know... 336 00:30:35,250 --> 00:30:37,210 Oh yes...they get bonuses for that. 337 00:30:38,290 --> 00:30:42,450 Yes, my Glaude, they didn't hesitate to hit a handicapped man... 338 00:30:44,330 --> 00:30:45,410 I'm going to tell the Mayor... 339 00:30:45,411 --> 00:30:46,810 Don't do that! 340 00:30:48,570 --> 00:30:49,610 I forgive them... 341 00:30:50,970 --> 00:30:52,210 they know not what they do. 342 00:30:57,290 --> 00:30:58,530 You! You're making a fool of me! 343 00:30:58,890 --> 00:31:02,330 Well, I'm going to prepare... your little bow tie! 344 00:31:39,570 --> 00:31:41,290 Go ahead, hang yourself, it's ready... 345 00:31:41,370 --> 00:31:44,410 You can swing all you want, deadmeat, it's strong! 346 00:31:45,770 --> 00:31:47,010 You go hang yourself! 347 00:31:47,490 --> 00:31:49,090 I don't march to anybody's whistle... 348 00:31:49,450 --> 00:31:51,090 I'll hang myself whenever I please! 349 00:32:19,090 --> 00:32:21,410 Aaah...Thank you, my little Guillaume! 350 00:32:21,450 --> 00:32:23,050 Come on in for a drink! 351 00:32:25,610 --> 00:32:27,650 I never offer any to your colleagues, their ass is always on fire! 352 00:32:28,610 --> 00:32:29,650 I saw you on your pottie! 353 00:32:31,770 --> 00:32:33,728 Let's have a pot, but not from the same one! 354 00:32:33,729 --> 00:32:34,890 That shouldn't take long! 355 00:32:41,130 --> 00:32:43,610 They say that Le Bombé has seen a saucer... 356 00:32:43,250 --> 00:32:45,410 He's batty...Everybody's making fun of him! 357 00:32:45,490 --> 00:32:46,770 Not surprising! 358 00:32:47,930 --> 00:32:49,650 Now he wants to hang himself! 359 00:32:50,450 --> 00:32:52,050 That's not too good... 360 00:32:56,330 --> 00:32:58,610 Sometimes... they really do it! 361 00:33:18,290 --> 00:33:20,970 Have you finished spying on me, ass-skinned face! 362 00:33:21,690 --> 00:33:24,128 Soon you'll be following me to the toilet, if it goes on! 363 00:33:24,129 --> 00:33:27,248 I don't give a damn about you, I came to see your vegetables! 364 00:33:27,249 --> 00:33:28,370 Well, they're downstairs! 365 00:33:28,930 --> 00:33:32,569 You see, on mine there are slugs...slugs this big! 366 00:33:32,570 --> 00:33:34,690 Eat them, that's what you can do! 367 00:33:57,970 --> 00:34:01,490 Oh, Le Glaude! Help me, I'm dead! 368 00:34:04,170 --> 00:34:07,130 Help me, El Glaude! Oh, nom de Dieu! 369 00:34:08,370 --> 00:34:09,409 I'm coming! 370 00:34:09,410 --> 00:34:10,410 Let me die! 371 00:34:10,970 --> 00:34:12,530 What's happening to you, Le Bombé? 372 00:34:16,290 --> 00:34:19,890 I...I destroyed myself... but the rope snapped! 373 00:34:20,690 --> 00:34:23,690 I broke my kidneys...like crystal! 374 00:34:24,250 --> 00:34:25,970 I'm going to die, Le Glaude! 375 00:34:27,610 --> 00:34:28,690 Ow, my ass hurts! 376 00:34:31,050 --> 00:34:32,370 Oh my God, my ass hurts! 377 00:34:34,450 --> 00:34:35,610 What's the matter? 378 00:34:36,530 --> 00:34:38,010 I can't breathe! 379 00:34:39,770 --> 00:34:41,770 You know...I could've killed myself! 380 00:34:42,010 --> 00:34:43,448 Call the fire brigade! 381 00:34:43,449 --> 00:34:44,450 Why? Are you thirsty? 382 00:34:45,090 --> 00:34:46,690 Oh my God...I feel bad! 383 00:34:48,450 --> 00:34:51,690 You know what? My hump has burst! 384 00:34:52,010 --> 00:34:54,130 My hump has burst, I can't feel it anymore! 385 00:34:54,210 --> 00:34:56,450 No, calm down... it's still there, you won't be disfigured! 386 00:34:56,451 --> 00:34:57,450 It's there? 387 00:34:57,970 --> 00:34:59,610 You see, you're not in a thousand pieces! 388 00:35:00,370 --> 00:35:01,370 Come on, let's go! 389 00:35:01,371 --> 00:35:02,850 Geez, it hurts! 390 00:35:05,130 --> 00:35:06,290 My ass is all sliced up! 391 00:35:08,890 --> 00:35:11,090 My buttocks went into my stomach! 392 00:35:13,170 --> 00:35:14,250 Careful now! 393 00:35:23,490 --> 00:35:25,890 Oh no, not there, Claude, not there! 394 00:35:26,850 --> 00:35:28,170 Oh, my Glaude! 395 00:35:28,650 --> 00:35:31,170 Makes you thirsty to tie a noose round the neck... 396 00:35:40,290 --> 00:35:41,769 Oh, that's so good! 397 00:35:41,770 --> 00:35:45,690 Oh, my Claude, for sure it's the first and last time I ever die! 398 00:35:46,890 --> 00:35:50,970 But I was conscious, I saw that flying saucer, I saw it! 399 00:35:51,130 --> 00:35:52,850 With mine own eye's! 400 00:35:53,250 --> 00:35:54,330 We fart, Cicisse! 401 00:35:55,250 --> 00:35:56,810 We fart like the other night! 402 00:35:58,610 --> 00:36:00,970 You need to fart? Is your ass all screwed up? 403 00:36:01,130 --> 00:36:03,130 We have to fart! 404 00:36:04,770 --> 00:36:06,570 Fart already, nom di Diou! 405 00:36:07,570 --> 00:36:08,850 But I'm not up to it... 406 00:36:09,730 --> 00:36:11,610 I'm not in the mood for that! 407 00:36:20,570 --> 00:36:21,730 We have to fart! 408 00:36:37,890 --> 00:36:39,770 Oh, my poor Cicisse... 409 00:36:50,650 --> 00:36:52,730 You shouldn't have done it! 410 00:37:08,610 --> 00:37:09,329 Easy now! 411 00:37:09,330 --> 00:37:10,810 Let me give you a peck! 412 00:37:14,450 --> 00:37:16,410 Another peck! 413 00:37:19,450 --> 00:37:20,930 And another peck! 414 00:39:39,690 --> 00:39:43,968 It's been nights and nights that I've been waiting for you to come down have a chat with me 415 00:39:43,969 --> 00:39:45,570 with your turkey noises... 416 00:39:48,770 --> 00:39:50,330 I'm here, Mr. Ratinier! 417 00:39:50,930 --> 00:39:52,450 You talk?! 418 00:39:52,850 --> 00:39:54,049 You talk?! 419 00:39:54,050 --> 00:39:55,410 You called me, I came! 420 00:39:57,490 --> 00:39:59,808 I called you... I called you... sort of... 421 00:39:59,809 --> 00:40:02,050 because, in that case, Chérasse called your too! 422 00:40:02,770 --> 00:40:05,850 You called me... more clearly than him! 423 00:40:07,650 --> 00:40:09,810 Nom di Diou, let's guzzle a "canon"! 424 00:40:19,170 --> 00:40:21,568 But... how did you learn our language? 425 00:40:21,569 --> 00:40:23,010 By listening to your people... 426 00:40:23,850 --> 00:40:26,570 every day, every hour, every minute... 427 00:40:26,690 --> 00:40:27,930 I come from planet Oxo... 428 00:40:27,931 --> 00:40:29,009 Really? 429 00:40:29,010 --> 00:40:31,610 A wee little planet, not even mentioned on your maps... 430 00:40:32,250 --> 00:40:36,090 If you knew how happy I am to see you again, my little fellow...! 431 00:40:36,690 --> 00:40:37,730 Me too, Mr. Ratinier! 432 00:40:39,090 --> 00:40:42,648 Listen, it's not because I could be your grandfather that you have to call me Mister... 433 00:40:42,649 --> 00:40:43,810 It's over, calling me Mister... 434 00:40:44,930 --> 00:40:46,890 I'm your age, Mr. Ratinier... 435 00:40:47,650 --> 00:40:49,090 Are you making fun of me, buddy? 436 00:40:49,210 --> 00:40:51,370 Geez, no... I'm 70, like you... 437 00:40:52,170 --> 00:40:56,090 But on Oxo, there's almost no change in us from beginning to end... 438 00:40:56,930 --> 00:40:59,530 It serves no purpose to change your appearance... 439 00:41:00,530 --> 00:41:02,770 Of course, it's useless... 440 00:41:02,930 --> 00:41:05,888 But down here, nobody asks us, we have to go through it... 441 00:41:05,889 --> 00:41:07,010 Take a look at me! 442 00:41:08,370 --> 00:41:10,570 There are others... look! 443 00:41:24,090 --> 00:41:24,970 A little "canon"! 444 00:41:25,690 --> 00:41:27,130 A "canon" is a wee drop of red wine! 445 00:41:27,290 --> 00:41:31,128 I understood that... it's a word that's often used in your language 446 00:41:31,129 --> 00:41:32,730 No thank you, I won't drink a " canon"... 447 00:41:34,650 --> 00:41:37,248 Well, maybe you people don't age much, but you don't have much fun either! 448 00:41:37,249 --> 00:41:39,130 We don't have any fun, as you say... 449 00:41:39,570 --> 00:41:41,930 Not one bit... never! 450 00:41:55,530 --> 00:41:57,930 This is much better than getting your ass kicked! 451 00:41:58,450 --> 00:42:01,009 My soup, please...I'm in a hurry! 452 00:42:01,010 --> 00:42:02,090 I'm on a mission. 453 00:42:02,091 --> 00:42:03,170 Let's go! 454 00:42:15,970 --> 00:42:18,849 Smell that... doesn't it smell great?! 455 00:42:18,850 --> 00:42:20,930 It smells of gardens, it smells of stables... 456 00:42:21,010 --> 00:42:23,410 it smells of the four seasons, it smells of the earth... 457 00:42:24,050 --> 00:42:27,090 the earrrrrrth, the EARRRRTH, "La Denrrrrée"... 458 00:42:27,130 --> 00:42:29,248 It smells of the earth after the raining... 459 00:42:29,249 --> 00:42:31,368 Over here, you don't say "the rain", you say "the raining", 460 00:42:31,369 --> 00:42:32,970 because it's even wetter! 461 00:42:34,490 --> 00:42:36,370 The earth... after "the raining"! 462 00:42:36,410 --> 00:42:38,490 That's it... spoken like a true "houmme" (man)! 463 00:42:38,690 --> 00:42:39,930 I speak like a true "houmme"? 464 00:42:41,210 --> 00:42:43,330 Come on, taste this... 465 00:42:57,290 --> 00:42:59,770 It's getting better and better, Le Glaude! 466 00:42:59,970 --> 00:43:04,530 Oh, you called me Le Glaude... that gives me pleasure! 467 00:43:04,770 --> 00:43:07,729 That proves that you're warm all over! 468 00:43:07,730 --> 00:43:08,730 Yes, Le Glaude... 469 00:43:09,930 --> 00:43:13,530 Oh, by the way, how did they find my soup up there? 470 00:43:14,490 --> 00:43:17,130 It has been found... dangerous! 471 00:43:17,890 --> 00:43:20,850 Dangerous?! Nobody has ever died from my soup! 472 00:43:21,690 --> 00:43:23,528 It's the first time I've ever heard anybody say that! 473 00:43:23,529 --> 00:43:25,050 That my soup is potentially lethal! 474 00:43:25,530 --> 00:43:30,530 Don't shout, Le Glaude! It's precisely because it's good that it's dangerous! 475 00:43:31,730 --> 00:43:33,330 I don't get it! 476 00:43:34,250 --> 00:43:35,810 I don't get it at all! 477 00:43:36,090 --> 00:43:37,810 I'm going to explain, Le Glaude... 478 00:43:38,130 --> 00:43:39,330 On Oxo... 479 00:43:39,610 --> 00:43:42,650 we number 10,000 total, not one more, not one less! 480 00:43:43,690 --> 00:43:46,930 And we all live till age 200... 481 00:43:49,330 --> 00:43:51,890 We don't die in the way you understand... 482 00:43:52,010 --> 00:43:53,970 but it would take too long to explain. 483 00:43:54,890 --> 00:43:58,090 Apart from us, on Oxo, there is no animal life. 484 00:43:58,170 --> 00:44:00,210 There is no vegetal life, either. 485 00:44:00,850 --> 00:44:03,410 Not that it's impossible, but it's unnecessary. 486 00:44:03,890 --> 00:44:06,290 We feed on mineral extracts... 487 00:44:06,770 --> 00:44:07,850 You understand, Le Glaude? 488 00:44:08,090 --> 00:44:09,050 So you suck stones... 489 00:44:11,290 --> 00:44:13,210 We form a perfect society, 490 00:44:13,410 --> 00:44:15,488 and that's why we want to make sure 491 00:44:15,489 --> 00:44:19,570 that your soup presents no danger of decadence and sapping our energy. 492 00:44:20,170 --> 00:44:22,488 But since my soup is dangerous, don't touch it! 493 00:44:22,489 --> 00:44:23,850 Why does it bother you, my soup? 494 00:44:24,290 --> 00:44:25,490 And why do you obsess over it? 495 00:44:25,530 --> 00:44:28,770 If we knew that, we wouldn't have created a commission of inquiry! 496 00:44:29,450 --> 00:44:33,250 Do you know, Le Glaude, that your soup is the only thing they talk about, on Oxo? 497 00:44:34,250 --> 00:44:35,170 Really? 498 00:44:35,530 --> 00:44:37,530 Oh yes, Le Glaude! 499 00:44:59,610 --> 00:45:02,130 Ah, it's the picture of my Francine... 500 00:45:02,490 --> 00:45:03,810 on our wedding day... 501 00:45:05,010 --> 00:45:09,810 I had thick hair then, and Francine had pink thighs... 502 00:45:10,090 --> 00:45:11,850 She was beautiful, my Francine... 503 00:45:12,050 --> 00:45:14,690 Don't you think, La Denrée, that she was very cute? 504 00:45:14,730 --> 00:45:15,730 Yes, Le Glaude... 505 00:45:18,090 --> 00:45:20,530 They're not all bad, those creatures... 506 00:45:21,130 --> 00:45:25,090 Sometimes you can see in them a glimpse of Paradise... 507 00:45:25,130 --> 00:45:27,210 That happened to me, with Francine... 508 00:45:27,730 --> 00:45:29,330 Tiny glimpses... 509 00:45:31,450 --> 00:45:33,770 She died, God's poor little child... 510 00:45:34,250 --> 00:45:35,450 10 years ago... 511 00:45:36,210 --> 00:45:38,170 She was barely 60... 512 00:45:38,770 --> 00:45:41,210 I miss her very much, La Denrée... 513 00:45:41,370 --> 00:45:42,290 Come! 514 00:45:51,810 --> 00:45:57,170 You see...I cut a lock from my Francine's hair... 515 00:45:57,370 --> 00:46:00,530 just before they closed the coffin's lid... 516 00:46:01,850 --> 00:46:03,890 When I called you "Le Glaude"... 517 00:46:04,450 --> 00:46:08,610 you told me it gave you..."pleasure"... 518 00:46:08,810 --> 00:46:11,050 What is..."pleasure"? 519 00:46:11,650 --> 00:46:13,370 How would I know? 520 00:46:13,570 --> 00:46:14,810 What kind of question is that? 521 00:46:14,811 --> 00:46:17,250 Pleasure is...pleasure! 522 00:46:18,170 --> 00:46:19,690 It's like soup, red wine... 523 00:46:21,850 --> 00:46:25,290 Would it give you "pleasure" to see Francine again? 524 00:46:25,291 --> 00:46:28,730 Oh! It's not decent to laugh about those matters! 525 00:46:28,850 --> 00:46:30,690 Down here, we respect the dead... 526 00:46:30,730 --> 00:46:31,730 Are you in your right mind? 527 00:46:33,490 --> 00:46:35,210 I'm sorry, Le Glaude...! 528 00:46:37,330 --> 00:46:38,850 My soup! 529 00:46:43,570 --> 00:46:47,770 But tell me, you still have 130 years to live...! 530 00:46:48,090 --> 00:46:51,090 Yes, Le Glaude...and you? 531 00:46:51,170 --> 00:46:53,290 Me? 10 years tops! 532 00:46:53,530 --> 00:46:54,690 That's "shorty"! 533 00:46:56,530 --> 00:47:00,210 Your soup, Le Glaude, I would like to pay for it. 534 00:47:00,410 --> 00:47:02,050 Pay me? I'd like to see that! 535 00:47:02,370 --> 00:47:03,968 Now I'm hurt, La Denrée... 536 00:47:03,969 --> 00:47:05,328 To talk about money in my home! 537 00:47:05,329 --> 00:47:08,130 I may not be rich, but I can still offer soup to a guest! 538 00:47:09,330 --> 00:47:10,610 Money? 539 00:47:10,730 --> 00:47:12,530 Yes,money...here it's nickels and dimes! 540 00:47:12,810 --> 00:47:14,370 And we need nickels and dimes over here! 541 00:47:14,530 --> 00:47:15,570 Nickels and dimes? 542 00:47:21,690 --> 00:47:23,010 You know what this is? 543 00:47:23,650 --> 00:47:25,530 It's a golden "louis" (old French coin). 544 00:47:26,130 --> 00:47:31,210 My uncle Anselme gave it to me as a reward for the high-school diploma I never got! 545 00:47:31,250 --> 00:47:34,489 Me neither...the license for the saucer, 546 00:47:34,490 --> 00:47:36,490 I got it on the fourth try. 547 00:47:37,130 --> 00:47:39,170 You're like me, not too sharp! 548 00:47:39,250 --> 00:47:42,690 Oh, no...can you lend it to me? 549 00:47:48,130 --> 00:47:50,008 Nom di Diou, a little "canon"! 550 00:47:50,009 --> 00:47:50,888 No, Le Glaude... 551 00:47:50,889 --> 00:47:51,808 A little "canon"! 552 00:47:51,809 --> 00:47:52,608 No, Le Glaude... 553 00:47:52,609 --> 00:47:54,008 Half a little "canon"! 554 00:47:54,009 --> 00:47:55,010 No, Le Glaude... 555 00:47:57,290 --> 00:47:59,370 You'll die a twit, and a twit is an idiot! 556 00:47:59,450 --> 00:48:02,450 I know that... I talk like you, Le Glaude, you taught me! 557 00:48:02,810 --> 00:48:06,048 But up there, you have leaders, don't you, in your ant-hill? 558 00:48:06,049 --> 00:48:07,970 We have a Comittee of Heads... 559 00:48:08,490 --> 00:48:09,850 five renewable heads... 560 00:48:10,650 --> 00:48:12,850 Well, when you'll have a drink up your nose... 561 00:48:13,050 --> 00:48:15,690 You'll be the head of all the heads...you'll be the... 562 00:48:15,691 --> 00:48:17,210 BIG HEAD! 563 00:48:20,370 --> 00:48:24,570 Oh...with all your stories you've completely screwed up my mind. I'm pooped! 564 00:48:32,050 --> 00:48:36,690 I won't see you off...leave the barn open... 565 00:48:37,250 --> 00:48:40,249 Au revoir, My Glaude, you're a good guy! 566 00:48:40,250 --> 00:48:41,850 You too, my old "Denrée"! 567 00:48:46,050 --> 00:48:48,810 Oh, you'll be back soon...?! 568 00:48:49,370 --> 00:48:49,810 Yes, my Glaude! 569 00:48:52,570 --> 00:48:57,209 Hey, La Denrée...don't forget my "louis" has a return address...! 570 00:48:57,210 --> 00:48:58,570 Yes! 571 00:49:19,890 --> 00:49:21,810 But...but... I'm telling you... 572 00:49:22,370 --> 00:49:24,330 it... it was 3:00 a.m...and... 573 00:49:24,331 --> 00:49:25,329 and... and... 574 00:49:25,330 --> 00:49:26,330 One, two, three... 575 00:49:26,450 --> 00:49:27,890 Well... what about it? 576 00:49:33,970 --> 00:49:35,490 OK, let's go! 577 00:49:35,690 --> 00:49:38,849 Yes...as I was saying, it was 3:00 a.m... 578 00:49:38,850 --> 00:49:41,249 as I felt a pressing need... 579 00:49:41,250 --> 00:49:43,249 I run out into the garden... 580 00:49:43,250 --> 00:49:44,929 and what do I see? 581 00:49:44,930 --> 00:49:46,530 A...a flying saucer! 582 00:49:46,730 --> 00:49:49,570 Yes... but it wasn't like the one of the other day... 583 00:49:50,170 --> 00:49:54,650 and then a man stepped out of it, holding a milk can... 584 00:49:55,010 --> 00:49:56,768 and Le Glaude, he was there... 585 00:49:56,769 --> 00:49:58,490 I mean Mr Ratinier, as you call him... 586 00:49:59,730 --> 00:50:02,850 and they...and they... they hugged each other... 587 00:50:03,650 --> 00:50:05,930 and then they ate... cabbage soup! 588 00:51:33,570 --> 00:51:35,570 You've been resurrected, poor old woman...! 589 00:52:41,050 --> 00:52:42,170 Le Glaude! 590 00:52:45,170 --> 00:52:46,290 Le Glaude! 591 00:52:51,250 --> 00:52:52,490 Le Glaude! 592 00:52:58,450 --> 00:52:59,690 Someone out there? 593 00:52:59,691 --> 00:53:00,970 Who... is it...? 594 00:53:03,490 --> 00:53:04,810 Don't be afraid, it's me! 595 00:53:05,890 --> 00:53:07,050 La Francine! 596 00:53:09,330 --> 00:53:11,050 Open up, Le Glaude, it's not warm... 597 00:53:20,890 --> 00:53:22,890 It... it's not possible! 598 00:53:23,970 --> 00:53:25,010 Here I am... 599 00:53:25,770 --> 00:53:26,810 I can see... 600 00:53:32,570 --> 00:53:34,050 It doesn't scare you too much? 601 00:53:34,810 --> 00:53:39,170 I...I just can believe you're talking to me and you're here! 602 00:53:44,890 --> 00:53:46,690 Let's not try to understand... 603 00:53:47,850 --> 00:53:48,810 we'd go mad! 604 00:53:58,050 --> 00:54:01,290 You're so beautiful, my Francine! 605 00:54:02,490 --> 00:54:05,530 I forgot how beautiful you were! 606 00:54:06,170 --> 00:54:08,850 Don't make fun of me...at my age... 607 00:54:09,610 --> 00:54:12,090 It's not right to laugh at someone who comes back from where I come... 608 00:54:12,930 --> 00:54:14,290 I'm still shaking all over... 609 00:54:16,090 --> 00:54:17,250 Wait...wait... 610 00:54:20,850 --> 00:54:21,930 Look, La Francine... 611 00:54:23,850 --> 00:54:25,930 See how beautiful you are... 612 00:54:30,690 --> 00:54:32,490 Oh La Francine, oh La Francine...! 613 00:54:32,491 --> 00:54:33,930 Vinegar! Vinegar! 614 00:54:34,690 --> 00:54:36,289 Where's the vinegar? 615 00:54:36,290 --> 00:54:37,528 Goddammit, where is it...? 616 00:54:37,529 --> 00:54:39,210 Oh mother...oh mother...! 617 00:54:41,770 --> 00:54:43,810 This isn't the time to faint! 618 00:54:46,130 --> 00:54:49,690 My little, little Francine...do you feel better? 619 00:54:55,410 --> 00:55:00,249 I'm here...Le Glaude...Le Glaude... 620 00:55:00,250 --> 00:55:01,370 Don't you recognize me anymore? 621 00:55:01,371 --> 00:55:04,730 Yes...but how old you are! 622 00:55:09,330 --> 00:55:13,250 Wait...see how beautiful you are! 623 00:55:19,210 --> 00:55:22,010 You're not going to cry...?! 624 00:55:23,850 --> 00:55:25,010 I'm so happy! 625 00:55:25,170 --> 00:55:26,890 Didn't I tell you you were beautiful? 626 00:55:29,970 --> 00:55:30,850 There...easy... 627 00:55:31,650 --> 00:55:32,528 I'm beautiful! 628 00:55:32,529 --> 00:55:33,528 Yes, you're beautiful! 629 00:55:33,529 --> 00:55:34,210 Very beautiful! 630 00:55:34,290 --> 00:55:35,810 Very beautiful! 631 00:55:36,570 --> 00:55:38,250 It's wonderful to be 20! 632 00:55:38,930 --> 00:55:41,170 I'm sure it's not unpleasant... 633 00:55:41,650 --> 00:55:47,050 Le Glaude...I live...I'm hungry...I'M HUNGRY!! 634 00:55:54,210 --> 00:55:55,610 5 minutes! 635 00:55:55,730 --> 00:55:56,730 Thank you, Glaude! 636 00:56:13,850 --> 00:56:15,010 Turn around! 637 00:56:20,210 --> 00:56:20,850 Turn around! 638 00:56:21,050 --> 00:56:24,488 But I've already seen you naked, even when you were you age! 639 00:56:24,489 --> 00:56:27,610 Don't start bugging me...turn around, I'm asking you...! 640 00:57:43,850 --> 00:57:45,050 Le Glaude, what are you doing? 641 00:57:45,370 --> 00:57:47,290 Well...I'd like to "arrange" you... 642 00:57:47,291 --> 00:57:48,289 "Arrange" me? 643 00:57:48,290 --> 00:57:50,490 Just try and I'll break the potty on your head! 644 00:57:51,970 --> 00:57:55,810 But, La Francine, you're my wife, and you're allowed to "arrange" your own wife... 645 00:57:55,811 --> 00:57:57,490 The potty on your head! 646 00:58:00,650 --> 00:58:05,010 Well, little brothers, that's a good start...! Oh well... 647 00:58:11,770 --> 00:58:13,810 I had to be a dream, Francine's return! 648 00:58:25,330 --> 00:58:27,610 You're wearing the latest fashion! 649 00:58:27,890 --> 00:58:29,890 You're right, a real scarecrow! 650 00:58:34,090 --> 00:58:36,290 You still have that filthy animal! 651 00:58:36,450 --> 00:58:38,250 It should be shot, this vermin... 652 00:58:38,570 --> 00:58:41,530 Speaking about vermin, Le Bombé, is he dead yet? 653 00:58:42,210 --> 00:58:43,810 No, he's not dead, he's sick! 654 00:58:43,930 --> 00:58:46,810 So, if you see him, tell him you're a great-niece of mine! 655 00:58:47,090 --> 00:58:49,370 I have to go to Jaligny, I have nothing to wear... give me some money! 656 00:58:49,410 --> 00:58:50,528 Well, how much do you want? 657 00:58:50,529 --> 00:58:52,888 Give me whatever I need! When you have a wife, you feed and clothe her! 658 00:58:52,889 --> 00:58:54,050 A wife...a wife...! 659 00:58:57,410 --> 00:58:59,010 Hey, it's my old-age retirement money! 660 00:58:59,050 --> 00:59:01,250 Now it's young people's retirement money, little father! 661 00:59:18,890 --> 00:59:19,970 Where's my bicycle? 662 00:59:23,730 --> 00:59:27,490 Tell me... what have you done with my bicycle? 663 00:59:27,530 --> 00:59:28,689 I sold your bike! 664 00:59:28,690 --> 00:59:29,768 You sold my bike?! 665 00:59:29,769 --> 00:59:31,610 Well, you don't usually pedal in coffins! 666 00:59:34,050 --> 00:59:36,850 While I'm away, you'll clear the table and wash the dishes! 667 00:59:36,930 --> 00:59:40,810 And instead of emptying mugs with your crony, you'd better scrub the floor! 668 00:59:40,970 --> 00:59:42,608 You can't even see the color of the floor tiles anymore! 669 00:59:42,609 --> 00:59:43,730 Now I won't allow you to speak like that! 670 00:59:43,890 --> 00:59:47,130 After all, I did bring you beautiful geraniums and beautiful petunias... 671 00:59:47,890 --> 00:59:50,770 From now on, you won't "arrange" me and no more chores either! 672 00:59:50,730 --> 00:59:53,130 All my life I've washed the sheets in the river, prepared the fridge... 673 00:59:53,490 --> 00:59:56,450 That life, I saw nothing of it, it flashed by like lightning without anything... 674 00:59:57,090 --> 01:00:00,450 So, one life lost, that's enough! I'm lucky enough to get a second chance... 675 01:00:00,730 --> 01:00:04,290 so I want to have fun, laugh and sing! That's it! 676 01:00:04,610 --> 01:00:07,730 But I must inform you that it's thanks to me that you're alive today! 677 01:00:08,530 --> 01:00:10,168 If I hadn't farted, you wouldn't be here... 678 01:00:10,169 --> 01:00:13,770 because, when I fart, La Denrée arrives right away in his flying saucer! 679 01:00:15,530 --> 01:00:18,970 Well well, you must have emptied quite a few barrels of cheap wine while I was gone! 680 01:00:20,970 --> 01:00:25,170 Well, little ones, little brothers, we're off to a real good start! 681 01:00:58,090 --> 01:00:59,250 Where are you headed? 682 01:00:59,251 --> 01:01:00,289 To Jaligny... 683 01:01:00,290 --> 01:01:01,410 Hop in, I'm going there too! 684 01:01:01,530 --> 01:01:02,570 - Let's go! - Thank you! 685 01:01:18,690 --> 01:01:21,210 I tore my dress... do I'll find a new one in Jaligny? 686 01:01:21,290 --> 01:01:24,250 Don't buy a dress, buy a pair of jeans and a T-shirt. 687 01:01:27,650 --> 01:01:29,090 You're not from around here, are you? 688 01:01:29,850 --> 01:01:35,250 I'm from Moulins, I came to take care of my great-uncle, Glaude Ratinier. 689 01:01:35,370 --> 01:01:38,850 Ha, Ratinier... Just put him on a water diet, he'll be cured instantly! 690 01:01:41,170 --> 01:01:42,489 What's your name? 691 01:01:42,490 --> 01:01:43,570 Francine... 692 01:01:43,890 --> 01:01:45,090 Mine is Catherine La Mouette... 693 01:01:46,010 --> 01:01:46,930 Great weather, don't you think? 694 01:02:03,650 --> 01:02:04,730 Let's go in, OK! 695 01:02:11,130 --> 01:02:12,210 Here's a T-shirt... 696 01:02:12,211 --> 01:02:13,450 Thank you! 697 01:02:18,970 --> 01:02:20,490 And here you are, pants... 698 01:02:21,930 --> 01:02:24,610 You have great breasts... I wish I had the same... 699 01:02:25,050 --> 01:02:27,010 Mine, next to yours, look like Laurel and Hardy...! 700 01:02:34,210 --> 01:02:35,848 Wow, it's superb like that! 701 01:02:35,849 --> 01:02:38,048 Not at all, it doesn't fit me at all, it's much too tight... 702 01:02:38,049 --> 01:02:40,770 It's very pretty and, what's more, it'll attract guys like flies... 703 01:02:41,810 --> 01:02:43,410 Where were you brought up, in the woods? 704 01:02:44,330 --> 01:02:45,450 There you go! 705 01:02:57,730 --> 01:02:59,770 You see, your T-shirt fits you like a glove! 706 01:02:59,850 --> 01:03:01,090 Hey, Catherine! 707 01:03:02,290 --> 01:03:03,250 Come, come! 708 01:03:06,970 --> 01:03:09,210 Let me introduce you to Lulu and Robert... Francine... 709 01:03:11,290 --> 01:03:14,650 Well, Lulu, what's going on? Step up to the next floor! 710 01:03:16,410 --> 01:03:18,850 Watch out! He's the biggest ladies' man of the gang! 711 01:03:45,490 --> 01:03:48,288 What's this attire?! You've lost your marbles, La Francine! 712 01:03:48,289 --> 01:03:50,570 Are you so hot that you have to go around almost bare-assed? 713 01:03:51,850 --> 01:03:54,128 It's at the cemetery that you learnt all those bad manners? 714 01:03:54,129 --> 01:03:55,290 I'm talking to you! 715 01:03:55,570 --> 01:03:57,610 Ho, you're a slut! 716 01:03:59,090 --> 01:04:01,330 No, I won't scrub the floor! 717 01:04:03,770 --> 01:04:04,770 And my change? 718 01:04:05,090 --> 01:04:06,170 Take it! 719 01:04:24,090 --> 01:04:27,448 But you've gone soft in the head, to show your ass like that to any passerby! 720 01:04:27,449 --> 01:04:29,130 But I'm only sunbathing, it's not a crime... 721 01:04:29,730 --> 01:04:31,529 Anyone could show up! 722 01:04:31,530 --> 01:04:34,650 So what? It's not disgusting! Some people pay to see women getting undressed! 723 01:04:34,730 --> 01:04:36,290 You wouldn't want me to take money for it, would you? 724 01:04:36,330 --> 01:04:39,810 But it's not done, nom di Diou, nom di Diou, you slut! 725 01:04:39,970 --> 01:04:42,650 You should have remained 6 ft. under, you vermin! 726 01:04:43,930 --> 01:04:47,530 It's nice to hear that! I've barely been alive 24 hours and you already wish me dead! 727 01:04:55,690 --> 01:04:58,890 Anyway, you should know before it's your turn to die, that I slept with Le Bombé! 728 01:05:00,210 --> 01:05:02,009 You slept with Le Bombé? 729 01:05:02,010 --> 01:05:05,130 You're not amused, are you? You'd like to see me back in my grave, wouldn't you? 730 01:05:05,050 --> 01:05:06,968 Exactly, I slept with Le Bombé! 731 01:05:06,969 --> 01:05:08,008 When? A little while ago? 732 01:05:08,009 --> 01:05:10,330 Of course not, you twit, not a while ago but when you were a prisoner! 733 01:05:11,650 --> 01:05:12,810 Touch me and you're dead! 734 01:05:13,330 --> 01:05:14,450 I was never told... 735 01:05:14,490 --> 01:05:15,890 We weren't going to tell you... 736 01:05:15,891 --> 01:05:17,370 Why did you do that? 737 01:05:18,370 --> 01:05:19,530 I was bored... 738 01:05:21,610 --> 01:05:25,370 He was bored... you were so far away... 739 01:05:25,850 --> 01:05:27,210 It was nothing... 740 01:05:27,930 --> 01:05:30,450 So, in the end, you were just a... 741 01:05:31,250 --> 01:05:34,050 Not even that... I was a lonely woman... 742 01:05:35,370 --> 01:05:36,409 Forgive me! 743 01:05:36,410 --> 01:05:37,410 No! 744 01:05:38,650 --> 01:05:40,488 But that was 40 years ago...! 745 01:05:40,489 --> 01:05:41,690 For me, that's all new! 746 01:05:41,970 --> 01:05:44,970 I've just been told I'm a cuckold, and I'm supposed to feel good about it! 747 01:05:45,250 --> 01:05:47,330 But you can't be a cuckold 40 years after the fact! 748 01:05:48,170 --> 01:05:51,970 When you came back, it was all over, and I loved you just like before... 749 01:05:52,930 --> 01:05:54,169 I swear to it! 750 01:05:54,170 --> 01:05:55,690 It's enough to drive you crazy! 751 01:05:55,930 --> 01:05:56,770 You mustn't! 752 01:05:58,210 --> 01:05:59,490 You don't mind if I go out? 753 01:06:00,210 --> 01:06:01,169 Where to? 754 01:06:01,170 --> 01:06:02,690 To the ball with Catherine La Mouette... 755 01:06:03,210 --> 01:06:04,330 The little La Mouette? 756 01:06:04,530 --> 01:06:06,528 Not that little... we're both 20! 757 01:06:06,529 --> 01:06:09,368 I'll never get used to your goddamn 20 years old! 758 01:06:09,369 --> 01:06:11,610 Go dance, have fun and come home whenever you want! 759 01:06:12,050 --> 01:06:13,050 Thank you, Glaude! 760 01:06:14,090 --> 01:06:16,690 I'm no longer your husband, your father, your grandfather... 761 01:06:17,010 --> 01:06:18,810 Yes, but you're a good man, my Glaude! 762 01:06:18,811 --> 01:06:19,810 I'm off! 763 01:07:00,130 --> 01:07:01,330 Hands up, Judas! 764 01:07:02,570 --> 01:07:03,930 Don't be an asshole! What's gotten into you? 765 01:07:04,050 --> 01:07:05,810 What's gotten into me is that I'm a cuckold! 766 01:07:06,370 --> 01:07:08,170 And by you, vermin! 767 01:07:11,010 --> 01:07:13,490 But how can you be a cuckold, you don't even have a wife?! 768 01:07:13,890 --> 01:07:18,650 I used to have one, and you "arranged" her when I was a prisoner... 769 01:07:21,330 --> 01:07:24,490 It never happened, I swear on my mother's head! 770 01:07:32,770 --> 01:07:34,690 This one is for wild boar... 771 01:07:35,650 --> 01:07:37,650 this one, for elephants... 772 01:07:38,690 --> 01:07:42,409 Now, I'll have your mug go through the wall! 773 01:07:42,410 --> 01:07:43,890 No, you're right, Glaude! 774 01:07:45,410 --> 01:07:48,050 I did "arrange" La Francine while you were away... 775 01:07:49,890 --> 01:07:51,090 How did you do it? 776 01:07:52,130 --> 01:07:53,810 Well... like everybody else... 777 01:07:53,890 --> 01:07:56,970 I'm not asking for details! How did it happen? 778 01:07:57,090 --> 01:07:58,610 Well... we were bored... 779 01:07:59,610 --> 01:08:02,650 I... was bored...it was winter, you weren't there... 780 01:08:03,130 --> 01:08:06,530 I used to chop her wood... she'd bring me a bowl of soup... 781 01:08:07,290 --> 01:08:11,690 we'd chat a little... we weren't old...it just happened... 782 01:08:12,570 --> 01:08:13,930 But we felt guilty, Le Glaude... 783 01:08:14,370 --> 01:08:15,408 And you did it again? 784 01:08:15,409 --> 01:08:16,970 Oh... as often as we could! 785 01:08:18,570 --> 01:08:19,930 But wracked all over by guilt... 786 01:08:21,290 --> 01:08:23,490 Ahh... you ruined so many nights for us... 787 01:08:23,491 --> 01:08:25,290 Excuuuuse me!!! 788 01:08:26,450 --> 01:08:27,610 Shoot me, Le Glaude! 789 01:08:28,370 --> 01:08:31,290 Shoot me! I don't deserve your forgiveness! 790 01:08:31,570 --> 01:08:33,768 Shoot me, or I'll hang myself for real! 791 01:08:33,769 --> 01:08:35,448 And I won't bungle it this time! 792 01:08:35,449 --> 01:08:37,410 Shoot me! I'm just a piece of garbage... 793 01:08:37,930 --> 01:08:39,449 a lump of dogshit... 794 01:08:39,450 --> 01:08:41,970 You can't be a cuckold 40 years after the fact! 795 01:08:43,090 --> 01:08:43,970 How about a "canon"...? 796 01:08:44,130 --> 01:08:45,250 Let's drink a "canon"! 797 01:08:53,530 --> 01:08:55,410 Anyway... my Glaude... 798 01:08:55,970 --> 01:08:57,210 I have to tell you something... 799 01:08:57,610 --> 01:08:59,730 I only had one woman, and she was yours... 800 01:09:49,890 --> 01:09:52,368 I'm going away, my Glaude, but I didn't want to leave without saying goodbye to you... 801 01:09:52,369 --> 01:09:53,490 You're going away? 802 01:09:53,491 --> 01:09:54,489 To Paris. 803 01:09:54,490 --> 01:09:55,970 To Paris? You're crazy! 804 01:09:56,450 --> 01:09:58,170 It's the only place we'll find work, with Robert... 805 01:09:59,770 --> 01:10:01,890 Do you know at least if he's a good man? 806 01:10:05,410 --> 01:10:06,370 I'll find out over time... 807 01:10:06,610 --> 01:10:08,450 If it doesn't pan out, I'll change... 808 01:10:09,490 --> 01:10:10,850 You're not too hurt that I'm going away? 809 01:10:11,730 --> 01:10:14,370 You...you have to follow your own mind... 810 01:10:14,770 --> 01:10:17,128 Exactly...our minds are not alike anymore, we would just yell at each other.. 811 01:10:17,129 --> 01:10:18,090 Don't you agree? 812 01:10:19,490 --> 01:10:21,810 You're the only one I've ever loved, La Francine... 813 01:10:22,210 --> 01:10:24,130 Same with me...Le Bombé, I never loved him, you know? 814 01:10:24,370 --> 01:10:25,370 I know that now... 815 01:10:25,770 --> 01:10:28,450 You have to be as happy as can be...! 816 01:10:30,810 --> 01:10:31,810 You're not mad at me? 817 01:10:32,050 --> 01:10:34,450 Why should I be mad at you, my little girl? 818 01:10:35,530 --> 01:10:36,530 I have to kiss you, my Glaude... 819 01:10:36,770 --> 01:10:37,730 Oh, I stink of wine... 820 01:10:37,810 --> 01:10:38,890 Don't talk nonsense! 821 01:10:42,370 --> 01:10:45,970 I wish you... all the happiness, my Francine... 822 01:10:47,090 --> 01:10:48,210 Me too, my Glaude... 823 01:11:27,330 --> 01:11:30,930 La Denrée, La Denrée...oh, I wasn't expecting you! 824 01:11:32,010 --> 01:11:33,290 But what's all this? 825 01:11:34,930 --> 01:11:38,570 I've been promoted... I'm not Oxian 2nd class anymore, I'm Oxian 1st class now! 826 01:11:39,210 --> 01:11:40,288 And thanks to you, Le Glaude! 827 01:11:40,289 --> 01:11:41,088 Thanks to me? 828 01:11:41,089 --> 01:11:42,650 Yes, thanks to your soup! 829 01:11:42,890 --> 01:11:45,810 They gave me the flying saucer that takes two hours instead of three! 830 01:11:46,050 --> 01:11:49,810 Now didn't I tell you you would be promoted, didn't I tell you?!! 831 01:11:50,210 --> 01:11:55,250 And that you had to start drinking "canons" to climb all over their heads, those "five heads" of yours! 832 01:11:55,970 --> 01:11:56,890 If you have any ambition... 833 01:11:56,891 --> 01:11:57,890 Oh no... 834 01:11:58,170 --> 01:12:00,290 If you have any ambition... you'll get there... 835 01:12:02,770 --> 01:12:05,889 Over here, the bigwigs only drink wine... 836 01:12:05,890 --> 01:12:07,490 but not your lowly soldier's wine... 837 01:12:07,610 --> 01:12:09,730 but wine corked and sealed... 838 01:12:10,250 --> 01:12:12,210 that we couldn't afford for ourselves... 839 01:12:12,450 --> 01:12:14,770 since we're the ones who make them pay for it! 840 01:12:15,210 --> 01:12:16,370 Come on, come on! 841 01:12:18,690 --> 01:12:22,810 Oh, I say, little buddy, I really could have done without you resurrecting my poor wife! 842 01:12:23,570 --> 01:12:27,210 It caused such a ruckus and, worse, such misery! 843 01:12:27,610 --> 01:12:29,330 I couldn't predict that, Le Glaude! 844 01:12:29,370 --> 01:12:30,688 Oh well, I'm not mad at you... 845 01:12:30,689 --> 01:12:33,330 if that makes her happy, I thank you anyway, for her sake... 846 01:12:34,050 --> 01:12:37,450 My Claude, I'm giving you back your golden Louis! 847 01:12:37,690 --> 01:12:39,450 My old Denrée...! 848 01:12:39,770 --> 01:12:40,650 My old Glaude...! 849 01:13:01,570 --> 01:13:04,929 But there's millions... millions... BILLIONS!!! 850 01:13:04,930 --> 01:13:07,490 It's just two minutes' work for a wee chemistry student! 851 01:13:13,130 --> 01:13:14,250 Help me, help me... 852 01:13:29,370 --> 01:13:30,450 Le Glaude...! 853 01:13:30,930 --> 01:13:32,290 From analysis to analysis, 854 01:13:32,370 --> 01:13:36,410 we have concluded that your soup is a soup called "pleasure"... 855 01:13:37,250 --> 01:13:38,530 So it's not poisonous anymore...?! 856 01:13:39,250 --> 01:13:41,050 Right now we are testing how to smile... 857 01:13:41,410 --> 01:13:44,770 since a smile is the outward expression of "pleasure"! 858 01:13:44,970 --> 01:13:48,010 It's a considerable event... a revolution!!! 859 01:13:48,770 --> 01:13:49,690 Le Glaude...! 860 01:13:50,890 --> 01:13:53,690 You must absolutely come live with us 861 01:13:53,970 --> 01:13:55,568 since you know how to plant cabbage 862 01:13:55,569 --> 01:13:56,890 and none other could manage! 863 01:13:57,490 --> 01:13:58,370 He's gone batty! 864 01:13:59,530 --> 01:14:01,090 He's gone batty! He's gone batty! 865 01:14:03,170 --> 01:14:04,770 He's gone batty! He's gone batty! 866 01:14:04,890 --> 01:14:06,010 No, I'm not batty! 867 01:14:08,330 --> 01:14:14,290 Oxo is a planet with oxygen, where you'll live to be 200, free of sickness and infirmity! 868 01:14:14,770 --> 01:14:15,770 And when you'll be up there... 869 01:14:16,530 --> 01:14:20,450 you'll still have 130 years to live, instead of 10, with lots of luck! 870 01:14:20,451 --> 01:14:22,250 He is baaaaatty! 871 01:14:23,170 --> 01:14:26,530 But I don't see myself living 130 years without a drink or a smoke... 872 01:14:26,610 --> 01:14:29,730 with a stone for lunch, a capsule for supper... 873 01:14:30,930 --> 01:14:37,570 I'd rather drag myself, for the next 5 or 10 years, from my cool cellar to my beautiful garden! 874 01:14:57,890 --> 01:14:59,890 Oxo? Earth! Oxo? Earth! 875 01:15:00,730 --> 01:15:01,610 Earth! Oxo? 876 01:15:25,930 --> 01:15:27,130 You're getting scolded, aren't you?! 877 01:15:27,210 --> 01:15:33,930 Not at all! A fleet of spaceships will deliver to Oxo everything you'll ever need during your long life! 878 01:15:34,170 --> 01:15:38,570 Including tobacco and wine, guaranteed to be free of mold and growths! 879 01:15:38,970 --> 01:15:42,170 I'll never set foot on your shitty dump! Do you understand? There! 880 01:15:46,210 --> 01:15:47,810 If you think I'm going to leave my house... 881 01:15:48,250 --> 01:15:50,170 and forget about Le Bombé who's my best friend... 882 01:15:50,410 --> 01:15:53,530 then you're insane, fit to be tied with rope for towing tractors! 883 01:15:55,570 --> 01:15:59,570 But Mr. Chérasse can go with you, since you can't reproduce yourselves! 884 01:16:01,410 --> 01:16:02,890 You take me for a fool, don't you? 885 01:16:03,410 --> 01:16:06,408 And our cat, there, who is going through the misery of old age, 886 01:16:06,409 --> 01:16:09,490 we'd let him die all alone, without the slightest caress? 887 01:16:09,690 --> 01:16:10,728 Is he in danger of dying? 888 01:16:10,729 --> 01:16:14,130 Absolutely right! He's 13, and he's in danger of not reaching 14! 889 01:16:15,370 --> 01:16:19,208 If I did that, I could never shave without spitting on my face in the mirror! 890 01:16:19,209 --> 01:16:20,810 You can bring him along too...! 891 01:16:21,370 --> 01:16:24,128 He'll live to be 200 years old, like you and me... 892 01:16:24,129 --> 01:16:26,530 You're just like old women, you always have the last word... 893 01:16:27,410 --> 01:16:29,330 You twist my arteries... 894 01:16:29,650 --> 01:16:31,730 We shouldn't have farted that night, 895 01:16:31,770 --> 01:16:34,090 and you wouldn't have been drawn to this place, like a fly to a pile of shit! 896 01:16:56,290 --> 01:16:58,930 Do you really mean it, Le Glaude, what you've just said? 897 01:16:58,931 --> 01:16:59,930 Perfectly! 898 01:17:01,050 --> 01:17:04,010 You shouldn't, because, me, I like you, Le Glaude... 899 01:17:04,650 --> 01:17:09,130 Even if they often chide me on Oxo that it's bad luck to like people... 900 01:17:12,250 --> 01:17:13,810 That's what they tell you, your savages? 901 01:17:15,730 --> 01:17:18,490 Well, me too, I like you, La Denrée! 902 01:17:19,090 --> 01:17:20,610 And I'm not ashamed of it! 903 01:17:21,410 --> 01:17:23,730 So you really do like me, Le Glaude? 904 01:17:23,970 --> 01:17:27,570 Yeeeees, my old Denréééée...! 905 01:17:27,690 --> 01:17:30,290 Ahhh...nom di Diou, nom di Diou... 906 01:17:30,610 --> 01:17:32,170 Pour me a "canon", Le Glaude! 907 01:17:32,250 --> 01:17:32,890 How's that? 908 01:17:32,930 --> 01:17:35,890 Don't you get it? Pour me a "canon", nom di Diou!!! 909 01:17:55,570 --> 01:18:02,530 Minute! A "canon", get this, is not only wine, but friendship too! 910 01:18:12,970 --> 01:18:13,970 Ahhh...nom di Diou! 911 01:18:30,850 --> 01:18:31,810 Le Glaude!!!! 912 01:18:33,490 --> 01:18:36,930 Back home there are only crazies in the government... 913 01:18:37,570 --> 01:18:40,090 and I'm going to replace them all by myself... 914 01:18:40,450 --> 01:18:43,370 and boot them out with kicks in the ass! Get it? 915 01:18:43,490 --> 01:18:45,050 What do you think, Le Glaude? 916 01:18:45,610 --> 01:18:50,170 I think you're already quite drunk and that you should go back up there before it's too late! 917 01:18:50,730 --> 01:18:52,010 Here you go... 918 01:18:53,770 --> 01:18:54,650 Your box! 919 01:18:55,370 --> 01:18:58,930 The Comittee of Heads has authorized me to leave it with you 920 01:18:59,050 --> 01:19:01,130 in order to speak with you at any time... 921 01:19:02,170 --> 01:19:05,328 Wh..what would I do with it, I can barely wind up a watch! 922 01:19:05,329 --> 01:19:06,650 You won't have to touch it... 923 01:19:07,330 --> 01:19:10,490 Whenever we'll want to talk, it'll light up, that's all! 924 01:19:11,330 --> 01:19:13,410 But Le Bombé, when he'll see this gizmo, he'll... 925 01:19:14,570 --> 01:19:16,650 He won't see it, the box... 926 01:19:17,810 --> 01:19:19,970 It'll be invisible to him... 927 01:19:22,210 --> 01:19:26,090 It is tuned only to your personal airwaves, yours only! 928 01:19:35,410 --> 01:19:36,570 A kiss, Le Glaude! 929 01:19:37,050 --> 01:19:39,530 Bye-bye now...my old Denrée... 930 01:19:59,090 --> 01:20:00,250 See who's here! Mr. Mayor! 931 01:20:02,170 --> 01:20:03,610 Ah, my children, I have news! 932 01:20:04,450 --> 01:20:06,370 Come... news... come! 933 01:20:08,170 --> 01:20:09,130 Good morning, Mr. Mayor! 934 01:20:09,410 --> 01:20:12,250 The prefecture has just authorized a large construction project for Les Gourdiflots! 935 01:20:12,290 --> 01:20:14,810 We're getting it, our new town, our entertainment park... 936 01:20:15,490 --> 01:20:16,890 The bulldozers attack tomorrow! 937 01:20:17,650 --> 01:20:22,049 Economic expansion, it's the wealth of the community! 938 01:20:22,050 --> 01:20:23,370 Aimée, drinks all around! 939 01:20:28,490 --> 01:20:29,530 To your health! 940 01:21:31,570 --> 01:21:32,650 We can't hear ourselves talk! 941 01:21:39,010 --> 01:21:41,050 We're going to treat ourselves to a good dose of "perniflard"! 942 01:21:53,450 --> 01:21:55,330 Oh nom di Diou! The Mayor! 943 01:22:32,610 --> 01:22:33,970 Good morning, Mr. Mayor... 944 01:22:34,250 --> 01:22:35,770 Well then... 945 01:22:36,690 --> 01:22:39,130 You didn't want to see Mr. Mayor, eh...? 946 01:22:40,370 --> 01:22:42,450 Ah, you old-timers... 947 01:22:43,770 --> 01:22:46,730 Ooooh...not a dull moment, eh? 948 01:22:47,330 --> 01:22:50,370 Hands on the "apéro", and it's not even noon...! 949 01:22:51,770 --> 01:22:55,050 So this is how old workers while away their retirement! 950 01:22:57,970 --> 01:22:59,168 You'll drink a toast with us, won't you? 951 01:22:59,169 --> 01:23:00,290 That's an offer I can't refuse! 952 01:23:04,290 --> 01:23:09,410 Anyway, Mr. Mayor, what brings you over... no problems, I hope... 953 01:23:09,610 --> 01:23:11,890 Oh no, it's more like good news! 954 01:23:12,410 --> 01:23:13,810 Wait!... wait! 955 01:23:14,610 --> 01:23:17,370 I have to explain the situation as it is! 956 01:23:20,330 --> 01:23:22,210 Maybe you haven't heard, since you live away from the village... 957 01:23:22,850 --> 01:23:26,570 but what this community needs is economic expansion! 958 01:23:27,610 --> 01:23:32,010 What all French villages lack is... economic expansion! 959 01:23:32,410 --> 01:23:37,290 And what is more, an economic expansion that will create jobs! 960 01:23:38,050 --> 01:23:41,010 That's something that didn't exist in your youth! 961 01:23:42,010 --> 01:23:46,570 My dear co-citizens and friends, listen carefully, it concerns you... 962 01:23:47,010 --> 01:23:49,208 You know about the housing project "Les Gourdiflets"? 963 01:23:49,209 --> 01:23:50,730 Oh, our ears are still ringing...! 964 01:23:51,410 --> 01:23:54,250 Well, to make this housing project complete, 965 01:23:54,490 --> 01:23:56,890 we're going to create right here, where you live, 966 01:23:56,930 --> 01:23:58,690 an entertainment park! 967 01:23:59,210 --> 01:24:03,250 There'll be restaurants, pubs, swings, everything you need to have fun! 968 01:24:03,810 --> 01:24:05,530 For everything, people will have to pay! 969 01:24:05,890 --> 01:24:09,370 They'll have to take out their wallets every two minutes! 970 01:24:11,570 --> 01:24:14,650 Instead of Le Glaude's shack... a parking lot... 971 01:24:16,170 --> 01:24:17,810 ...4000 cars!! 972 01:24:19,730 --> 01:24:21,690 And instead of Le Glaude's fields... 973 01:24:22,010 --> 01:24:25,410 10,000 beach chairs and intelligent music! 974 01:24:25,650 --> 01:24:28,490 And instead of my shack, what's there going to be? 975 01:24:30,370 --> 01:24:32,650 "The Rock of the Monkeys"!!! 976 01:24:35,210 --> 01:24:36,290 Get the hell out! 977 01:24:36,410 --> 01:24:38,570 You piece of shit... get the hell out! 978 01:24:39,570 --> 01:24:41,888 Ah, I warned them at the municipal council 979 01:24:41,889 --> 01:24:44,930 that you would be troublemakers, just to spite us! 980 01:24:46,570 --> 01:24:49,688 If you weren't old and sick, I would have you expropriated! 981 01:24:49,689 --> 01:24:52,090 But don't laugh too soon, Chérasse and Ratinier... 982 01:24:52,770 --> 01:24:54,330 ...very soon we'll win! 983 01:25:03,770 --> 01:25:09,010 The bulldozers and the shovels, they'll be roaring in your ears, I guarantee you that! 984 01:25:09,011 --> 01:25:10,010 Out! 985 01:25:10,210 --> 01:25:14,210 Human wrecks...pile of old bones...Me! Out? 986 01:25:15,890 --> 01:25:17,570 You'll be happy on Sundays 987 01:25:18,050 --> 01:25:20,370 when people will watch you through the fence 988 01:25:20,770 --> 01:25:25,130 and will throw you peanuts for fun, old wrecks! 989 01:26:17,530 --> 01:26:22,330 I told you so, that I'd make your life hell, old fossils... 990 01:26:23,050 --> 01:26:24,850 and when you'll be at the cemetery, 991 01:26:25,370 --> 01:26:27,810 our community, having gotten rid of you deadweights 992 01:26:28,370 --> 01:26:34,250 will finally be able to spread the wings of economic expansion!!! 993 01:26:35,090 --> 01:26:38,970 Old fossils! I'll cook your goose, I will! 994 01:27:00,690 --> 01:27:03,530 The two nitwits! The two nitwits! The two nitwits!... 995 01:27:05,890 --> 01:27:09,770 Oh no, no, no...I can't anymore...I can't anymore... 996 01:27:13,090 --> 01:27:16,010 No, no, no... It's over, it's over, it's over... 997 01:27:17,330 --> 01:27:19,410 Wait..a little "canon"! 998 01:27:19,530 --> 01:27:20,690 A little "canon"... 999 01:27:25,210 --> 01:27:28,490 Tell me, Cicisse, how would you like to live 200 years? 1000 01:27:28,570 --> 01:27:29,890 You're talking nonsense... 1001 01:27:30,130 --> 01:27:31,730 No, I'm just asking you one single thing... 1002 01:27:31,970 --> 01:27:34,330 would you like to live till age 200? 1003 01:27:34,450 --> 01:27:35,570 Well, certainly not here! 1004 01:27:35,770 --> 01:27:37,490 That's the thing...it wouldn't happen here... 1005 01:27:38,410 --> 01:27:41,730 Would it be on the moon, I'd pack up my bundle right away! 1006 01:27:42,170 --> 01:27:45,890 Only one thing would bother me, my Glaude: to leave you here, drinking all by yourself... 1007 01:27:46,570 --> 01:27:47,690 for 130 years! 1008 01:27:47,930 --> 01:27:51,170 That's why we'd leave together, with the cat too! 1009 01:27:53,530 --> 01:27:55,368 He too would live to be 200? 1010 01:27:55,369 --> 01:27:56,850 Of course! So you agree? 1011 01:27:58,250 --> 01:28:00,930 Yes!...Yes!...Yes! Mon Gla! 1012 01:28:01,410 --> 01:28:03,250 Let's get the hell out, Mon Gla! 1013 01:28:06,730 --> 01:28:07,890 Oxo? Earth! 1014 01:28:09,010 --> 01:28:10,170 Oxo? Earth! 1015 01:28:11,010 --> 01:28:12,610 OXO? EARTH! 1016 01:28:12,730 --> 01:28:13,890 You're there, La Denrée? 1017 01:28:14,290 --> 01:28:15,730 I'm here, Le Glaude! 1018 01:28:16,530 --> 01:28:18,610 La Denrée, there's news! 1019 01:28:19,290 --> 01:28:22,250 Le Bombé is willing to go, and with the cat! 1020 01:28:22,530 --> 01:28:23,530 And you, Le Glaude? 1021 01:28:23,930 --> 01:28:27,330 Well, if the cat and Le Bombé leave, I follow them, of course! 1022 01:28:27,370 --> 01:28:30,488 At last, at last, you give me "pleasure", Le Glaude! 1023 01:28:30,489 --> 01:28:31,970 Le Bombé is here, talk to him! 1024 01:28:32,490 --> 01:28:36,570 So, tinker with you airwaves so he can hear you and see the box! 1025 01:28:37,090 --> 01:28:38,970 I'm calling back in 2 minutes! 1026 01:28:38,971 --> 01:28:40,930 OK, I'll bring him over! 1027 01:28:55,210 --> 01:28:57,770 Sit yourself here so you won't hit the floor with your ass! 1028 01:29:02,930 --> 01:29:06,450 Look!...Look! 1029 01:29:10,450 --> 01:29:12,130 I can't see anything... 1030 01:29:12,210 --> 01:29:13,090 I can't hear anything... 1031 01:29:13,170 --> 01:29:14,410 Shut up! Don't disturb the airwaves! 1032 01:29:14,411 --> 01:29:15,410 Look! 1033 01:29:18,370 --> 01:29:19,530 Mr. Chérasse... 1034 01:29:21,530 --> 01:29:22,490 Mr. Chérasse... 1035 01:29:23,810 --> 01:29:25,050 Oxo! Earth? 1036 01:29:25,850 --> 01:29:26,930 Oxo! Earth? 1037 01:29:27,530 --> 01:29:30,490 This is La Denrée...are you there, Mr. Chérasse? 1038 01:29:30,570 --> 01:29:31,690 Say yes, dummy! 1039 01:29:33,530 --> 01:29:34,850 Well, yes...it's me... 1040 01:29:35,290 --> 01:29:37,090 Don't be afraid, Mr. Chérasse! 1041 01:29:37,930 --> 01:29:38,810 I'm not afraid... 1042 01:29:40,010 --> 01:29:42,890 Do you want to live 200 years, Mr. Chérasse? 1043 01:29:44,330 --> 01:29:45,850 I'd be very grateful... 1044 01:29:46,970 --> 01:29:51,330 Ahhh, I'm so happy, Mr. Chérasse, with your decision! 1045 01:29:51,370 --> 01:29:52,850 Happy...happy! 1046 01:29:53,770 --> 01:29:56,610 I'll come tonight at midnight for your departure... 1047 01:29:57,370 --> 01:30:00,490 Le Glaude! You'll introduce to me Mr. Chérasse! 1048 01:30:00,491 --> 01:30:01,490 Yes! 1049 01:30:03,130 --> 01:30:04,130 Will there be soup? 1050 01:30:04,810 --> 01:30:05,930 We'll make some! 1051 01:30:06,690 --> 01:30:07,930 Will there be a little "canon" to drink? 1052 01:30:08,650 --> 01:30:09,850 There'll even be two! 1053 01:30:11,450 --> 01:30:13,610 See you soon, Mr. Chérasse! 1054 01:30:17,730 --> 01:30:18,530 So that's it! 1055 01:30:19,890 --> 01:30:22,530 What do you say, old nut? 1056 01:30:23,690 --> 01:30:24,850 I'd like to... 1057 01:30:25,210 --> 01:30:25,968 I'd like to... 1058 01:30:25,969 --> 01:30:27,370 If I don't drink a "canon" right away... 1059 01:30:28,650 --> 01:30:29,970 I'll be in a bad way! 1060 01:30:37,850 --> 01:30:38,850 I'm going to the post-office! 1061 01:30:40,450 --> 01:30:41,490 You'll be back, won't you? 1062 01:30:41,770 --> 01:30:42,610 You won't leave me all alone... 1063 01:30:42,890 --> 01:30:43,610 In one minute! 1064 01:31:01,970 --> 01:31:04,890 Madame...registered... 1065 01:31:50,050 --> 01:31:51,010 Francine! 1066 01:31:54,770 --> 01:31:56,848 There's registered mail for you, I signed for you... 1067 01:31:56,849 --> 01:31:58,250 so, put it aside and come back on the double! 1068 01:32:25,330 --> 01:32:31,130 My dear Francine, I'm going on a trip, it would take too long to explain... 1069 01:32:32,050 --> 01:32:34,170 Here are a 3 or 4 pennies that I'm sending you... 1070 01:32:35,210 --> 01:32:37,410 because where I'm going, they're not needed... 1071 01:32:37,650 --> 01:32:38,970 which is not your case... 1072 01:32:39,690 --> 01:32:43,250 Put them in a savings account, where they'll multiply... 1073 01:32:43,690 --> 01:32:45,970 Don't show them to your motorcyclist... 1074 01:32:46,410 --> 01:32:50,170 it's not because you know me that you know men... 1075 01:32:51,370 --> 01:32:57,290 Beware of them like cholera, they're all liars... thieves, and the like... 1076 01:32:57,690 --> 01:33:01,209 I kiss you tenderly, and repeat once more... 1077 01:33:01,210 --> 01:33:04,770 ...Be happy! Your old Glaude. 1078 01:33:40,330 --> 01:33:41,490 Let me introduce... 1079 01:33:41,530 --> 01:33:42,690 Mr. La Denrée... 1080 01:33:43,210 --> 01:33:44,410 ...Mr. Chérasse... 1081 01:33:45,930 --> 01:33:47,090 Hop in!