(MARIACHI)
Hey, Pete, are you sure this is the place?
(CHUCKLES) You saw the letter. This is the place.
Don't you think it's a little funny, I mean, your uncle giving you this race car?
- Sentimental reasons. - Yeah.
Would a cracked block be a sentimental reason?
All we got to lay out is the storage fee. You got the money.
I got the money.
All finished!
- Shine? - No, thanks.
You are personally connected to a Puerto Vallartan.
Show you plenty good time!
- What do you think, Pete? - It's not in the budget. No, thanks, son.
Where do you want to go? Paco'll show you. Free on the house!
- "Taller Mecanico Avenida." - Cardenes!
No problem. I show you exactly.
I like Americans. Americans very smart people.
Someday, I go to America.
When you do, you look up Pete Staniczek here.
He'll put you up, show you the best ice cream parlors.
That sounds good!
You see down there? That's Avenue Cardenes.
Turn left, that way. Go two blocks, you'll find Mecanico.
- Thanks. - De nada. Anytime!
Welcome to Puerto Vallarta.
- Gracias. - See you later, alligator.
Cute kid, d'ya know what I mean?
Well mannered, polite, didn't have his hand out.
(CHUCKLES) An endangered species.
SHEPARD: That light area, right around 4:00.
I can see it.
- And you say this is Inca. - You're the expert, you tell me.
Did anyone else spot this?
They were looking for oil.
And where is this?
(CHUCKLING) In the jungles. South America.
Mr. Shepard, there's nothing to be gained by our playing games.
This could very well be an undiscovered Inca city.
And you know what that means, pre-Columbian artifacts.
- And gold, Mr. Prindle. - And what do you want?
Cash. And plenty of it.
'Cause they're gonna throw the key away if they find us stealing that stuff.
Yeah, it's a national treasure, or something.
- Is there another print of this? - That's it.
Gentlemen, we're in business.
PETE: There's gotta be some mistake.
Ah, no, señores. No, señores.
This is not a mistake. This is Señor Douglas' car.
And you're telling me that this thing won the Monte Carlo Grand Prix?
That is what Señor Douglas told me.
He say he'd have won the Baja race too,
but his girlfriend...
Did not make the curb.
Herbie, he see it, he stop.
He not finish the race. Señor Douglas say, "It's here."
Let's turn it over.
La llave, señor.
(ENGINE STARTING)
- Okay, so it runs. - Let's take it. It's transportation home.
- Señor. - Si, señor?
Mind if we take it around the block first?
Okay, señor.
Cute kid, huh? Doesn't have his hand out.
He doesn't have his hand out because it's in your pocket.
You check that side.
See if you can find us a taxi.
- I'll get you a taxi, señor! - Get lost, kid. Taxi!
All right, 12:00, the national hotel bar.
SHEPARD: I'll be there.
- Carry your bags, señor? - Move along, sonny.
- No trouble. I carry your bags cheap! - Put the bags down.
- I said, put the bags down! - Hey, kid!
- Come on, get away from me, will ya? - Taxi!
Very sorry, señors. Please, you forgive me!
He said he liked Americans and put his arms around us.
Then took us to the cleaners. Never mind reenacting the crime.
Just look for the little... There!
See that grubby little foot out behind that box?
A cold beer says it's attached to Paco the dip.
Shh. Shh.
(DOOR SQUEAKS)
Come back here, you little bandit!
We need that worse than you do!
D.J.: Don't scare him! Talk to him nicely!
Ooh!
Yee! Ah!
- (SPEAKING SPANISH) - Buenos dias!
(CONTINUES SPEAKING SPANISH)
Oh!
PETE: I'm sorry, lady. We're looking for a little kid.
Did you see a little kid? I'm sorry.
Me too, lady.
You look that way.
(DOG BARKING)
- What took you so long? - It's not easy in this town.
Mr. Prindle, if you want to get in touch with me before,
you can use this number.
- My wallet's gone. - Maybe you left it up in the room.
It was that kid. That crummy little kid!
Buenos dias!
(BOTH GRUNT)
I don't know. He must've skipped town.
PETE: No, he didn't. This time we sack him.
You take him low, I'll take him high.
- Oh, no, you don't! - Is that yours?
- No! - Is it ours?
- Si! - Grab loose of that.
- Nah, looks like that's all he got. - I'll take over, dipstick.
I oughta tan your bottom!
(SING-SONG) Oh, I got money.
Look, there he is!
(WHISTLING) Hold it, kid!
BOTH: Hold it.
- Wait a minute! - Hold it, kid!
- Wait! - Why? What we want's in that mailbox.
Let's get the kid first, just in case. Come on!
Somebody, stop that boy!
Stop that kid, someone! Hey, you, grab him! Anybody!
(SIREN WAILING)
He's over here, come on!
- (SPEAKING SPANISH) - (WHISTLE BLOWING)
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
QUINN: Look up there! Over here too!
(BABY CRYING)
- Busca arriba. - Si.
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
(CONTINUES SPEAKING SPANISH)
(CAR HORN HONKING)
Well, like you said, transportation.
Let's close the deal and get out of here.
(ENGINE STARTS)
There he is! In the car!
(SCREECHING)
(BOTH YELLING)
What, are you planning to sleep over at the local jail, lead foot?
I'm not doing anything!
- Maybe this bug did win the Grand Prix! - We got ourselves a race car.
- This your wallet? - Yes, Officer, thank you very much.
- Is something missing, señor. - No, everything's fine.
It's all here.
We will continue looking for the car and the boy, of course.
Thank you, Officer. We'll catch up with you.
Film's gone.
Why would a kid take it?
I don't know, we gotta get it back, though.
I'll never get another one.
Steady, boys!
That's the car that's going to win the Grand Primeo at Brazil!
- Something's weird about that car, D.J. - I know!
It's dynamite and it'll blow the doors off anything in the race.
(MAN SPEAKING IN SPANISH ON PA)
MAN: (ON PA) Attention, please.
Sun Princess will be embarking in 20 minutes.
We blew it.
The car's on the ship, the boy's on the ship.
- That thing's going to Rio. - Its first stop is Panama.
When it gets there, we'll be waiting for it.
The booty was taken aboard the man-o'-war
and the enemy vessel scuttled.
The women were then turned over to the crew,
the select ones going to the officers, naturally.
The wenches were escorted below
and, believe me, there was no poetry or "by your leave"...
Or, "How lovely you look, madam."
One got to the matter at hand in short order.
Each captive seaman was given 100 lashes with the cat,
spread-eagled on the rigging.
(WHISPERING) My dear Captain Blythe.
(HISSES)
They didn't last long in those latitudes, I can tell you.
In no time at all, they were bloated carrion for the birds of prey.
Yah!
Oh, do have some of the green turtle soup, Mrs. Purkiss.
It's the chef's specialty.
- (POP) - (GASPS)
Well, no sooner broken out the grog,
then the entire Spanish Armada was closing on them.
Everything looks so tempting.
Yes. (SIGHS) Doesn't it?
They were met with stiff resistance as they clamored aboard.
It was parry and thrust, thrust and parry.
(SCREAMS)
- Uh, permit me. - Thank you.
- Anyone else? - Oh. No, thanks.
Where was I? Well, the deck was awash with blood!
What are you gonna have?
I think I'll have that Captain
on a bed of roses.
CAPTAIN BLYTHE: Blast, a great shot might sweep the deck clean.
Aunt Louise, you're incorrigible.
I know! (GIGGLING)
I've never regretted a moment of it.
Right this way, gentlemen.
My goodness, what a pleasant surprise.
Two handsome young gentlemen as our dining companions.
I'm Louise Trends.
- Davy Johns. - Pete Staniczek.
Pete, this is my niece Melissa.
Well, sit down, sit down.
Oh, just lucky, I guess.
- You gentlemen going to Rio? - Not exactly, ma'am.
Oh, I was, uh, telling Melissa...
Rio is a city of romance.
You really, to get the most out of it, have to, um, share it with someone.
- Wasn't I, Melissa? - Aunt Louise.
Well, personally, I won't have much time for that sort of thing.
I'll be utilizing every moment I have copying down material for my doctorate.
Oh! You're gonna be a doctor?
Yes, of Latin American cultures.
Celery? (GIGGLES)
(WHISPERS) Cool it with the doctor bit.
Well, so what does take you gentlemen to Rio?
Actually, we're headed further south.
We're entering a car in the Brazil Grand Primeo.
Pete here handles the wheel. The rest is my lookout.
- You're a race driver. - Yeah.
Oh, isn't that fascinating!
Oh, I love race cars, don't you, Melissa?
Not really.
Well... Hungry?
(HUMMING)
Ah! (MUTTERING) Ahh.
(MUTTERING IN ITALIAN)
Ah! Here we go.
(SINGING IN ITALIAN)
(SPEAKING ITALIAN)
Buon appetito, eh? (CHUCKLING)
Ah! (SPEAKING ITALIAN)
(PHONE RINGING)
(CONTINUES SPEAKING ITALIAN)
(SIGHS)
(PHONE RINGING CONTINUES)
ARMANDO: But I checked the pressure five minutes ago. Everything is fine!
Number one, okay! Yes, I know how Captain Blythe is,
but I tell you, the dial is right on the nose. I see it for myself.
(MUTTERING IN ITALIAN)
Who take-a my chicken?
(FAINT CHEWING SOUNDS)
A-ha! So you think you can steal Armando's dinner and get away with it?
We're gonna see about that. Oh, yes.
Okay. Open up. Open up, little car.
No car's gonna eat my dinner. Open up. I tell you!
Open up!
(YELLING, MUTTERING)
(MUTTERING IN ITALIAN)
A-ha! Heh-heh-heh! Open up.
Open up. (GRUNTING)
MAN: You can't drive that car down here.
This is the number one hold. Some of your cargo, it's-a broke loose!
Send your officer watch down here fast. No, but I mean real fast! Si.
- Hey, what's going on? - That car has no driver!
Better notify Captain Blythe!
OFFICER: (WHISPERING) Shh! All right, men.
Spread out and be careful.
Psst!
(WHISTLING QUIETLY)
Now!
(GRUNTING)
And I am to believe that this, uh... Car...
Ate your chicken dinner?
Eh, and then he spit out the bones! (SPITTING)
Who is this?
Wiper, third class, Armando Moccia, sir.
Do you know the penalty for drinking on duty,
wiper, third class?
(MUTTERING IN ITALIAN)
Armando not touch one drop. No, please!
The car ate my apple. I know because I hear with my own ears!
Eh! Muncha-muncha-munch!
Muncha-muncha-munch, eh?
Do you know what I'm going to do with your ears?
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
Uh, where is the car now?
Went for a drive after dinner.
Oh. And was it smoking a cigar and drinking a brandy?
The perpetrator of this little jest will receive 50 lashes
before ship's company and set adrift in a...
(GASPS)
Perhaps you'll be good enough to tell me about
your grandson's snooky another time.
- (GASPS) - Wiper, third class, Armando Moccia?
- Aye-aye, sir. - (CRASHING)
(MEN YELLING)
(CAR ACCELERATING)
(CAR BRAKING)
- Ah! - (GRUNTING)
Ah! Hmm. (GRUNTS)
Okay, men, secure it. Get the blocks and make it good.
Capitáne. Muncha-muncha-muncha! Si!
See? Hah!
(GRUNTS, SNORTS)
Now.
How did you want to handle that?
You mean pay for it?
Or did you plan to, uh, reassemble the stemware yourself?
- It's not our responsibility. - (WHIP CRACKS)
I'm your captain, judge and jury. I'll decide what's your responsibility!
Captain!
Hmm. The, uh, the cargo manifest states unequivocally
that you, Peter Staniczek, are the sole owner of the car.
You are the consignor and the consignee.
Your car did damage, ergo...
- D.J.: Yeah, but Pete wasn't driving... - Stop!
I, uh, I have been advised by our public relations department
to waive all charges of kidnapping.
And smuggling illegal aliens into a foreign country.
- Where is that kid, anyway? - In the storeroom,
where he'll remain until the ship reaches Panama,
at which time he will be turned over to the port authorities
and returned to his native country.
In the meantime, your automobile will be impounded
until your obligations are met.
Captain.
Uh, gentlemen,
I do hope you've been enjoying the cruise so far.
Remember, we have a shuffleboard tournament on main deck at four bells...
And, uh, disco lessons in the lounge at six bells.
Thanks, anyway.
We can write the Captain an I.O.U.
And pay him out of our winning at the Grand Primeo.
There's no way we can raise that kind of money.
Maybe we should chalk it up to experience and work our way home.
- Maybe Aunt Louise will bail us. - You are a dreamer, D.J.
Wait a minute.
She likes cars and she's trying to get her niece hooked up.
Yeah?
- No! - Wait a minute.
All you gotta do is keep the Doc enthralled with tales of derring-do
while I initiate Aunt Louise into the delights of Formula One racing.
I don't like it.
Come on, man! Nothing good comes easy.
Lots of charm, lots of charm.
You may not believe this, but this is an exact replica, down to the last button,
of the uniform worn by Lord Nelson when he defeated the Spanish Armada.
- Seems like it belongs on me, doesn't it? - I love a uniform.
It gives a man a certain... (BLOWS)
- At ease, madam! - Captain!
Excuse me, I must circulate among the cargo... Uh, passengers.
Anyway, like I was saying, it's the thrill of a lifetime,
when you see that car that belongs to you
streak across that finish line a winner.
Not only that, you're part of the technological advancement
of the automotive world.
- Oh, really. - Mmm-hmm.
I wonder... Where the kids are.
Now isn't that...
WOMAN: (SINGING) In my heart and my hand
I've never seen...
They seem to be enjoying themselves.
Yeah, they're hitting it off.
Pete's a great guy. He's what I call a beautiful person.
With your head up in a cloud
Where you belong
Please look at me
If I stay around
Maybe something good will happen
Have you look into my eyes
And realize...
- My kind of racing. - (CHUCKLING)
Oh, pardon me. That's the third time I've done that.
Who's counting? I'm having a great time.
- Are you really? - Yeah.
And so...
Usually when we race, a good time means,
towing the crew across Texas in the middle of august,
looking for a Denny's, then bedding down in some fleabag motel.
Now here I am...
Soft lights, sweet music,
pretty girl.
Uh, Mr. Staniczek, you don't really have to say those things.
Oh, I know that. It's just that you're different than other girls I've known.
- I can well imagine. - No, no, it's a compliment.
For one thing, you don't giggle when there's nothing funny.
And you listen when I talk.
A man looks a long way for a girl like that.
And, uh...
And maybe then
Our fingers touch
You are pretty, Melissa.
And you'll thrill me oh, so much
A lovely dream
That's meant to be
If you would give
One look
At me...
Ah, this is it.
I just want to thank you for this evening.
- I... I really enjoyed myself. - Me too.
Well, good night.
Melissa?
- This is the pits. - Did something go wrong?
We went wrong when we got into this.
I don't like playing games with people.
Oh, come on, just a couple more days. I already got the money.
Aunt Louise gave me a check. We got the car out of hock.
And get this, kiddo. She's gonna sponsor us all the way.
We name it, she buys it, no limit!
All you gotta do is keep making like Burt Reynolds.
- So, that's the deal. - Well, I sorta read it between the lines.
Anyway, the important thing is we're back in the running.
Ahh! Nothing's gonna stop us now.
(WEAK HONKING)
Hi!
- That captain sure was mad, wasn't he? - (HONKING)
What is he gonna do with you?
Honk-honk-honk.
They will send me back where I live... With the orphans.
But it's okay. They put me back, I run away again.
- Can we be friends? - Honk.
- What's your name? - Honk-honk.
- Que? - (SLOWER) Honk-honk.
- I just call you "Ocho," okay? - Honk-honk.
(WHISTLING)
Atta boy, Ocho!
Thanks, Ocho. I'll pay you back.
But you better go back where you were, so you won't get in trouble.
(FOOTSTEPS)
Uh-oh!
(ENGINE STARTS)
There it goes! Don't let it get out of this hold, men!
OFFICER: Check over by the elevator, men!
(RUNNING FOOTSTEPS)
In those days, a captain was a captain.
And a ship was a ship, not a floating carnival.
And the only women aboard were dragged there by the scruff of their neck!
Whoo, gives me goose bumps just thinking about it.
The Captain is having a little jest with you ladies.
I'm only telling it like it was.
(QUIETLY) Or should be.
Yes, when you talked about liberation in those days,
you were talking about battles,
nations, empires.
(CRASHING)
- Oh! - Oh!
Oh!
LOUISE: Oh, Captain. Oh, my word!
Sorry!
(GROANS, SPITS)
But, Captain, how can a car release a boy with a key? Explain that!
I can't explain that any more than I can explain
the Bermuda Triangle, madam. Nor do I intend to try.
Captain, I am the sponsor of that little car.
It's going to win the Brazil Grand Primeo.
If you can bring that off, I will not only part the Red Sea,
I will tint it magenta.
Oh, oh, Captain. I appeal to you as a woman,
a desperate, helpless,
single woman.
Spare that car.
Lorelei and her sirens could not make me veer one degree!
- My course is set! - Oh!
Ship's company! Stand to, to witness punishment!
Sir, the passengers might not understand.
I am simply abiding by the traditions of the sea,
Chief Steward.
By the powers vested in me as the Captain of this ship,
I hereby deem this vehicle a menace
to life and limb and the very safety of the vessel itself.
I herewith commit it to the sea,
a fate well-deserved.
- Doff hats! - (DRUM ROLL)
Seamen... Do your duty.
(WEAK HONKING)
(WEAK HONKING CONTINUES)
(CROWD GASPING)
- You too? - Oh, bag and baggage.
Anyone remotely associated with that little car is being put ashore.
If it hadn't been for that steward, we'd have been keelhauled.
Sorry it turned out like this.
If I decided to get out of needlepoint and into racing, it was my choice.
- Actually, there's more to it than that. - Steady, steady.
We needed backing, so D.J. pitched you on the car while... I...
Pitched my niece on the fantail.
I've got too much mileage on me, not to recognize
an operation when I see one.
You mean you knew that?
Well, I was hoping that...
Something might happen between you and Melissa.
She's really a wonderful girl.
- She's terrific but... - A little klutzy for someone like yourself.
Not everybody's made for each other.
I really like her and I don't want her to get hurt.
I plan to tell her but maybe you can smooth things over.
- Here's your bag, Miss. - Thank you.
Melissa, there you are! I was just looking...
You meet such interesting types on ships.
Melissa!
Sorry, boys.
Come on, pal.
How do you say in Panamanian,
we need a job?
Excuse me. I don't know where you're taking this boy,
but I have prior claim on him.
- Oh, are you from juvenile authority? - Yes, I am.
- No, he's not! - Aah! Aah!
We'll handle it!
- Grab that kid! - Stop that kid!
He's wanted by the police!
We gotta get that kid!
We'll get him.
Tom, you better come take a look at this.
- What the devil is that? - I don't know.
Supposed to be the Major Maroux.
(SOFT HONKING)
Ocho?
- (HONKING) - Ocho!
I'm coming, Ocho, I'm coming!
- Ayudame, andale! - Vamonos!
(HONKING)
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
(GRUNTING, LAUGHING)
(LAUGHING CONTINUES)
What is the matter with Ocho?
- It's an old wreck. - But he was my good friend.
Your friend is good for nothing but junk.
(LAUGHING)
Hey, even junk worth something.
(CACKLING)
Bye, Ocho.
Vaya con Dios
(RATTLING)
Ocho!
Come on, Ocho, you can do it. Try, try!
Please, Ocho, come on!
(BACKFIRING)
Don't give up now, please, please!
Try, try!
I help you!
(SPEAKING SPANISH)
It's those men. Come on, you gotta start!
You're whippin' a dead horse, muchacho.
We gotta get outta here!
This is our car now! Go play someplace else.
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
(ENGINE ROARS)
(MEN COUGHING)
You feeling better, Ocho.
A friend
It takes one to be one
Takes some time till the light starts shinin'
On a friendship
A friend
Step up if you need one
Stick out your hand
They should understand it's a friendship
A buenos dias Come on, try
A pat on the back A wink of the eye
That's what friends are for and remember this, charro
They'll stick with you today and tomorrow
Amigo
It's nice if you've got one
But it's nicer if you're not one to stop
From lookin' for more
The world is full of people who need you so much
A million hearts there to touch
And I bet you a banana
Mañana you'll have a new friend
And I bet you a banana
Mañana you'll have a new friend
A friend
It's nice when you see one
But it's nicer when you be one
You look good, Ocho, like a real taxi.
Now we're gonna make lots of money.
Then Paco will never have to take nothin' from nobody again.
(DOOR CLOSES)
PRINDLE: Just relax, sonny.
- Now, where is it? - Where's what?
There was some film in the wallet you took from us in Puerto Vallarta.
When we got it back, it was missing.
- Where is it? - I don't know. Maybe it got mixed-up.
What do you mean, "mixed-up"?
With the other man's wallet.
He's lying.
(GRUNTS)
Maybe, maybe not.
Now you listen to me. I want that film back.
I don't care how you do it, just get it back!
Because if you don't...
He's gonna cut this car of yours
up into tiny, little pieces.
You understand, kid, huh?
Little strips to hang on your Christmas tree?
Comprende?
Si.
You know, Pete, I was just thinking.
Do you realize that that car could've put us in the big time?
We could've been international celebrities.
You know what I mean?
Endorsements, groupies chasin' after us.
It's that kid. Murphy's law took over from the time we ran into that brat.
Hi, guys.
Speaking of four-foot crime waves.
I come to say, I sorry if I make trouble for you.
Yeah, well, fine. See you around.
Paco go. I just want you not be mad at me.
(CRYING)
Now don't start that. Nobody's mad.
It's water over the dam.
I'm sorry. Please, you forgive me?
Fine, kid, no hard feelings. Forget it.
(WHISPERING)
Straight back there, through that hallway and to the right.
Gracias!
Gloriosky! Just makes you feel good all over.
He did it again.
- Come back here, you little bandit! - (HONKING)
PETE: Hey, that's our car!
- How can that be our car? - I don't know. Let's get him!
We better get outta here, or those guys are gonna get you back!
(TIRES SCREECHING)
Shepard's ready. He's got the plane.
Good. Here comes the boy.
(TIRES SCREECHING)
Why, that little, double-crossing... Come on!
(WHISTLING)
Taxi!
- Taxi! - Taxi!
Let me get in here.
It's a little tight. Pardon moi, señor.
- Pier 6, the Sun Princess. - Pier 5, the Windsong, please.
- You! - You!
- I'm terribly sorry... - I'm terribly excited...
But it's imperative I return to my ship immediately.
I'd be so pleased...
- You can have the cab after that! - Thank you.
- The Sun Princess. - The Windsong, please.
We're in real trouble now, Ocho.
BLYTHE: And full steam ahead!
Where in blazes are you going, driver?
No comprendo, señor.
You people comprendo enough when you want to!
Wait a minute.
(GASPING) It's that same kid!
And here's the biggie, I think it's the same car.
It's a ghost. Let me outta here!
Let me outta here, or it's the yardarm for you!
Can't stop now, señor.
- Look! - Oh! Uh...
- Melissa! Melissa! - Help, help!
- Help! - I'm being shanghaied!
Help, Melissa!
Help! I'm being shanghaied!
The kid, he robbed us again!
- He shanghaied them. - Shanghai?
Señor, stop! Could you please stop?
Por favor, alto!
Por favor, alto. Please stop.
(BRAKES SQUEALING)
Por favor, señor! Muchas gracias.
- How much? - How far you want to go?
No, how much for the whole bus?
Huh?
Is $340 enough?
Lady, you got yourself a bus!
Next bus, please.
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
(LAUGHING)
(PASSENGERS COMPLAINING)
BLYTHE: Now, listen to me, son.
If you don't release me this instant,
I'll have you tied to a cannon to be discharged at sunset!
PACO: I can't stop.
Two men said that they would cut up Ocho in little pieces,
and two other men are very mad at me.
(BUS ENGINE CLATTERING)
MELISSA: Is that banging noise new?
D.J.: Just louder. It might throw a rod.
- Uh, is that serious? - Not if it happens in front of a hotel.
(BACKFIRES)
Are we still in Panama?
Panama's long gone, Capitán.
What? Let me out of here!
Can't, Capitán. There's some men after me!
No, Ocho, not in there!
SPECTATORS: Olé!
What was that?
We're at the bullfights, Capitán.
Oh, this is exciting.
- I think it will be, señora. - What did he mean by that?
- (SNEEZING) - God bless you.
Turn in there!
This can't be right. Back up!
(SPECTATORS CHEERING)
Oh!
We're goin' in!
(SPECTATORS CHEERING)
(BELLOWING)
(SNORTING)
- What are we gonna do? - Just ignore him.
(BOOING)
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
(SPECTATORS BOOING)
(SNORTING)
Come on, get it off the car!
(CHEERING)
(GRUNTING)
Come on!
(SPECTATORS CHEERING)
(SHOUTING, BOOING)
Oh... Ooh!
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
Please get us out of here, kid.
I'm not asking for myself, but I'm very worried about this lady.
- How thoughtful! - Just shut up!
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
BLYTHE: Gangway! Move it!
Aaah!
Get goin', Ocho!
Aaah!
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
- We're stopped. Where's the bull? - There he is.
What a magnificent animal.
I think you can see him better from here.
Aaah!
Hey, Ocho, we gonna let him get away with that?
Yes, you are! Let's get out of here!
(SPECTATORS CHEERING)
BLYTHE: Scat, scat, scat!
Ocho, he's gonna kill ya! You just can't stand here doin' nothin'!
You gotta fight! Take a good look at him!
PACO: He's a killer!
(ENGINE REVVING)
He is going to fight.
That-a-boy, Ocho!
I can't believe this.
Thirty years at sea, and I'm going to die in a bullring.
PACO: Hey, toro, toro!
(PACO SHOUTS IN SPANISH)
- No toros! Shh! - Toro!
(PACO SHOUTS IN SPANISH)
Hey, toro!
Good, Ocho!
That-a-boy, Ocho! Stay with him!
Olé, Ocho!
(SNORTING)
(SPECTATORS CHEERING)
Atta boy, Ocho! You take him now!
Look, son, I want you to know that I think of you as my son.
If you get us out of here, I'll make you first mate of the Sun Princess.
You and your little car can stay in a nice suite,
and eat at my table every night.
The big boat will take you anywhere you want to go, okay?
Don't worry, Capitán, we got him now!
(GROANING)
Over here, toro! Over here!
Olé!
Hey, toro, toro! That-a-boy, Ocho!
He's getting awfully close, Ocho!
- Aaah! - I'm going to be sick.
They got voodoo down here, you know that?
(SPECTATORS CHEERING)
(CHEERING CONTINUES)
SPECTATORS: Olé!
Olé!
(SNORTING)
He's had enough. Let's go.
Come on.
They want us to take a bow, all of us!
(SPECTATORS CHEERING)
Oh, wait. Come out.
Nothing in this world will induce me to go out there.
- They'll be disappointed. - Don't pull on me!
Don't do that!
(NOT AUDIBLE)
Mmm! Ahh!
(CHEERING CONTINUES)
PACO: You too, Capitán. Take a bow!
(WILD CHEERING)
(ENGINE STARTING)
Oof!
(HONKING)
What's wrong, Ocho?
Oh!
(TIRES SCREECHING)
Wait a minute!
- I told you. - Let's get Shepard and the plane!
Captain, the boy!
That boy's in trouble! Help him! Help!
Can't we go any faster?
We could, but we'd have to walk.
The fact that we're moving at all violates every principle
of the internal combustion engine.
Hey, wait a minute.
MELISSA: It's Aunt Louise. D.J.: And Captain Blithe?
Aunt Louise, are you all right?
Ecstatic. Well!
LOUISE: We just fought a bull, and brought it to a standstill.
PETE: Looks like you lost, Captain.
BLYTHE: Reverse your course.
LOUISE: We have to find that boy. There's some men after him.
What if he doubled-back on us?
We'd have seen him. There's only one road around here.
Just keep looking for that crazy car.
LOUISE: He doesn't understand "bracket."
All right, then, get some wire.
- Huh? - Wire.
Wire, wire.
- Wire? - Wire, uh, wire.
Wire.
Sounds like "fire."
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
- He's gonna get some. - Thank you.
- Uh... - Fuego.
Um, señor, no. Hmm-mmm.
- The Sun Princess. - MAN: Como se llama?
Tell the mate I've been stranded in Timbio.
(MAN SPEAKS IN SPANISH)
- The Sun Princess! It's a ship! - Sheep.
- Now... No, not a sheep. It's a ship. - Princessa es sheep.
Not sheep. That's "baa-baa"! This is "toot-toot"!
- Tu comprendo no. - What do you mean, "No comprende"?
In St. Augustine, not far from here,
they have monolithic statues that are...
Well, they go back to 500 BC,
but nobody knows who made them or where they came from.
I wish I could help you.
I'm sure you'd find a cold six-pack much more exciting.
Oh, now, have I hit on something that you hold dear and sacred?
Look, I led you on. I apologize.
Oh, please, don't.
Well, I'll just have an electrocardiogram when I get home.
But I can assure you, there's been no damage.
You're wasting valuable time bickering.
Who knows what's happened to that boy by now?
I'll just see what's holding up the Captain.
BLYTHE: Why are you all staring at me?
It's a conspiracy! What?
(MAN SPEAKS SPANISH)
Siesta centavos.
Don't go away. I'll get it for you.
(BOTH SPEAKING SPANISH)
MAN: Three minutes more cost you more money!
Siesta centavos.
Oh, here.
Yes, we're getting it for you. I beg you, don't hang up.
Yes, I'll be right with you.
I love your country. It's very colorful.
Your children have such expressive faces.
Look alive with that change, woman!
Please don't go away. I'll get it for you.
Are you still there? Hello?
Hello?
Hello!
She's gone.
It took me two hours just to get the operator,
- and she's gone. - Oh...
- Just like that. - Oh.
Hello?
Oh, yes, de nada.
How will I explain this to the company?
You just tell Aunt Louise all about it.
- They'll take away my command. - Yes, oh.
- They'll take away my sheep. - Oh, your sheep.
PACO: I think we lost 'em, but one thing I still can't figure out,
why would those men want a picture like this, Ocho?
It's kinda lonely around here, huh, Ocho?
Honk-honk.
When we're safe from those men,
we'll go back where there's lots of people, huh, Ocho?
Honk!
QUINN: We've got him!
Why don't we force him off the road?
Because we just might come off second best.
Well, what's a bug and a kid gonna do?
(CHUCKLES) Something quite unexpected, I assure you.
We'll wait till it stops.
(PLANE ENGINE BUZZING)
(ENGINE CLATTERING)
Will it make Chiclayo?
Not a prayer.
- How long do you give it? - About a minute.
We should alert the Captain. He'd want to know about this.
PETE: He'll be alerted, any second now.
Sound general quarters!
- Captain! - It's every man for himself!
Have you put out distress signals?
Oh, we will.
Five of them.
Maybe we can go to Santiago and work there, Ocho.
Those men'll never find us there.
Don't worry, Ocho. I'll take care of ya.
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
(BOTH SPEAKING SPANISH)
Wake up, Ocho! A man in the cantina needs a taxi.
We can siesta later.
Someone want a taxi?
Just a driver.
Ow! Let go!
Let me go! Let me go!
Let me go! No! Let me go!
Aaah!
Ocho!
Let me go! Help!
Ocho!
Bye-bye.
How's it going?
I'm telling them not to hold the ship at Port-au-Spain,
but go directly to Tobago, where I'll join them there.
I hate to think of what's happened to that ship in my absence.
Get this off immediately.
It goes to the communication center of the Sun Princess.
Are you certain that the pigeon understands that?
Si, Señor Capitán.
He certainly knows his pigeons.
There's an airport in Chiclayo, about 12 miles further on.
But there's no transportation from here to Chiclayo.
(ENGINE REVVING)
LOUISE: It's the same car!
I was so worried. Thank heavens!
It's the same car, but where's the boy?
(HONKING)
I think he wants to tell us something.
It's a car, woman, not Lassie.
Where is Paco?
Honk-honk-honk.
I know something terrible's happened to him. Come on.
Get in, everybody. Get in!
I am not getting into that sardine can again!
It's a 12-mile walk to Chiclayo, so make up your mind.
And hurry!
Get in here! Ow!
Oh! Aaah!
PRINDLE: What about that down there?
Yeah, that could be it.
SHEPARD: Gentlemen, we're right on the money!
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
PRINDLE: Together now, pull!
(GRUNTING)
(THUNDER)
- What do you think? - Gold!
Probably pure gold!
(LAUGHING)
More than that, it has tremendous archeological value.
- Do you think there's more? - Plenty.
QUINN: What do we do with it?
I say we get this outta here now,
then come back with tools and do it up right, okay?
PRINDLE: You got it.
- What about me? - Get outta here!
Aaah!
SHEPARD: I don't like leavin' that kid back there.
QUINN: Don't worry about him. He's not goin' anywhere.
Does anyone know where we are?
The car does. I'm sure of it.
Well, ask it, will you? I would, but we're not on speaking terms.
MELISSA: This is ridiculous. Somebody ought to do something.
We'd better just sit tight.
Easy for you.
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
(SHIVERING, CRYING)
(THUNDER RUMBLING)
(ANIMAL SCREECHING)
Aaah!
(ANIMAL GROWLING)
(HONKING)
Ocho!
Paco, what are you doing here in the middle of the jungle?
We were worried sick about you.
Those men, they were stealing gold.
Big gold, like this!
PETE: Where'd they get gold?
Right there. It looks like Inca ruins.
Si. It's Inca.
They will fly away the gold and they will melt it. I hear them.
I'll see that the matter is brought to the attention of the proper authorities
when we put in at Rio.
PACO: That might be too late.
Go, Ocho!
(ENGINE REVVING)
What's that?
Come on, give us a hand! Let's keep movin'!
Oh, no! It's that car!
It ate it! It ate the gold!
QUINN: How'd it get out here?
- There goes a million bucks. - No way.
(SIGHING)
700 miles on a banana boat with wheels.
I'll be laughed off the Caribbean.
It worked, didn't it?
Those men in the airplane, they couldn't find us.
It was a good idea, Paco. How much farther?
We're practically there.
Okay, get ready to peel off.
Hmm, sorry.
MELISSA: We're looking for Dr. De Moraes' office.
PETE: He's upstairs, in the main building.
I'll call the police.
Hello.
You go on. I'll wait here.
Aaah!
May I use your phone? It's very important. Oh, thank you.
Hey!
Are you going towards the sea?
It's vitally important I return to my ship!
Wait, wait!
- (KNOCKING) - Dr. De Moraes?
Yes?
Oh, Dr. De Moraes,
you have no idea what we've gone through to get this to you.
And what we've gone through to get it from you.
When we couldn't find you on the highway,
we decided that you'd either gone to the nearest police station...
Or to the world's foremost authority on Inca civilization.
I guessed right.
Nice, ripe bananas. They're good for brains.
Get 'em while they last. Very cheap.
Nice, ripe bananas. Let's make a deal on a peel.
Let's do this thing together.
We don't want this to get away from us.
(ENGINE CRANKING)
Ocho, listen. Sounds like the airplane those men had!
Let's go see!
(BRAKES SQUEALING)
They can't do anything. Come on.
Ocho, what are we gonna do? They're taking the gold!
Atta boy, Ocho!
Wh-wh-whoa!
Sorry, boss!
Get this thing off of me!
Hit 'em again, Ocho!
You idiot!
- Hey, come on! Hurry up! - Get this thing off of me!
(GROANING)
Give me that thing!
(MUMBLING)
I can't get a grip on it!
Let's do this scientifically.
Pull! Push!
Cut it out, will ya?
(GRUMBLING, GROANING)
Get off of my foot!
Help me get it to the plane.
I can't see!
Whoa!
(GROANING)
Hurry up, pilot!
PACO: Ready... Fire!
Say what you want about voodoo,
but where I come from, cars don't throw bananas.
Just get it in the plane!
Ocho, they're getting away. Hurry!
(TIRES SQUEALING)
Come on, let's get this thing outta here!
With this extra weight, I'm gonna need the whole field to take off!
Well, hurry up! Here it comes again!
QUINN: You think he's gonna try and hijack us?
PRINDLE: Anything's possible with that thing.
Get 'em, Ocho! Stay with 'em!
- I wonder what it's gonna do now. - I don't know.
Well, take off! Come on, take off!
I'm trying! I'm trying!
Right on our tail.
I think he's tryin' to chew it off.
Do we need one?
Now, Ocho, get him!
Don't let go! That-a-boy!
Shake 'em, Ocho! Shake 'em, man.
I can't take off with all that weight in the tail. Go get it!
- Catch it when I raise the tail. - Gotcha!
Aaah!
Go for it, Ocho, now!
Hang on!
Shake it off!
Come on, Ocho, you can't give up now! They're getting away!
SHEPARD: He's going to ram us!
- Aaah! - Do something!
Why are we going in circles?
Because he broke my tail, that's why!
Now get in front of 'em! Make 'em stop!
Get this thing off the ground!
We're gonna hit him! Pull up! Pull up!
She's stalling!
They're still going, Ocho!
- What's the matter? - The throttle jammed open!
My wings!
- You hurt, Ocho? - (WEAK HONK)
You don't sound so good.
Don't quit now. You can do it!
PETE: Can you step it up? MELISSA: I'm hurrying.
- Move your feet forward. - I got it, I got it.
Uh, uh...
Policia!
I'm so glad you're here. I was the one who called you.
Stay with 'em! Go, go!
(POLICE SIRENS)
Can't you make this thing go any faster?
The oil pressure's down. I don't want to ruin my plane.
(POLICE SIRENS)
They got the gold!
PACO: Stop! You'll never get away!
LOUISE: We're right behind you!
Okay, Ocho, you got 'em now! Give it to 'em!
Whoa!
- You did it! - Paco, Paco.
That's him! Paco, are you all right?
Ocho and me, we okay. You ought to see those other guys.
(OFFICERS SPEAKING SPANISH)
(DANCE MUSIC)
Gorgeous! Just magnificent.
I've always felt, Captain, that you have a...
Deep appreciation for beauty.
I've never seen anything like it.
Any man of the sea who wouldn't want her rolling under him...
Is ready for dry dock!
Wow!
Magnificent!
I'm not admitting the kid's a better driver than I am,
but he sure can get more out of that car than I can.
- And they're really... - Simpatico.
Yeah, simpatico.
Well?
If I had billowed out like a schooner under full sail,
I might have...
Shivered his timbers.
- I hope we win this one. - Don't you worry, Aunt Louise.
This is the car that's gonna win the Grand Primeo of Brazil.
That's right.
MAN: Drivers, start your engines!
(CLAPPING)
Paco, muy bueno!
(CLAPPING)
(ENGINE STARTS)
Looking good, Ocho!
Why do you keep calling this car "Ocho"?
"Ocho" means eight. Can't you read the numbers?
Sure I can read the numbers. Five and three are eight.
Anyone knows that.
(LAUGHING)
Let's have a toast.
To victory in Rio.
ALL: Victory in Rio!
A friend
It takes one to be one
Takes some time till the light starts shinin'
On a friendship
A friend
Step up if you need one
Stick out your hand
They should understand it's a friendship
A buenos dias Come on, try
A pat on the back A wink of the eye
That's what friends are for and remember this, charro
They'll stick with you today and tomorrow
Amigo
It's nice if you got one
But it's nicer if you're not one to stop
From lookin' for more
The world is full of people who need you so much
A million hearts there to touch
And I bet you a banana
Mañana you'll have a new friend
F-r-e-n-d, friend