1 00:00:02,202 --> 00:00:03,871 Yes, thank you. Uh, charge it to the room? 2 00:00:03,971 --> 00:00:05,939 Stephanie Simmons. 3 00:00:06,039 --> 00:00:08,942 -Dr. Stephanie Simmons? -Yes. 4 00:00:09,042 --> 00:00:10,410 As in dear friends with 5 00:00:10,511 --> 00:00:11,678 Dr. Olivia Winters? 6 00:00:11,778 --> 00:00:13,113 How do you know Olivia? 7 00:00:13,213 --> 00:00:15,449 She would be my mother. 8 00:00:15,549 --> 00:00:16,950 Nate? 9 00:00:17,050 --> 00:00:18,619 Nate Hastings! 10 00:00:18,719 --> 00:00:20,487 -[laughing] -Oh, my goodness! 11 00:00:20,587 --> 00:00:22,723 Olivia's son? Lily's cousin? 12 00:00:22,823 --> 00:00:23,857 Yeah. 13 00:00:23,957 --> 00:00:26,527 Come here! Oh, wow! 14 00:00:26,627 --> 00:00:28,462 [both laughing] 15 00:00:28,562 --> 00:00:31,765 Oh, my goodness! 16 00:00:33,634 --> 00:00:36,069 Holden. Hi. 17 00:00:36,169 --> 00:00:37,871 Lily, hey. 18 00:00:37,971 --> 00:00:39,773 Are you meeting someone? 19 00:00:39,873 --> 00:00:41,508 Um...no. 20 00:00:41,608 --> 00:00:42,976 I'm on my own. 21 00:00:43,076 --> 00:00:45,445 If you'd like to sit... 22 00:00:45,546 --> 00:00:47,080 Um... 23 00:00:47,180 --> 00:00:48,482 yeah, yeah. 24 00:00:48,582 --> 00:00:50,284 Awesome. Thanks. 25 00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:57,090 So, uh... 26 00:00:58,792 --> 00:01:01,128 Have you...have you heard from Malcolm or your kids? 27 00:01:01,228 --> 00:01:04,097 Um, no. Malcolm's in LA with them, 28 00:01:04,197 --> 00:01:06,733 but the test results aren't in yet. 29 00:01:06,833 --> 00:01:08,802 Which means, at this moment, 30 00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:11,071 Malcolm does not have a match. 31 00:01:11,171 --> 00:01:14,741 No. But, I mean, there could still be good news. 32 00:01:14,841 --> 00:01:16,443 Yeah. 33 00:01:16,543 --> 00:01:19,146 He really got hit with it, didn't he? 34 00:01:19,246 --> 00:01:21,148 New son and life-threatening 35 00:01:21,248 --> 00:01:23,350 disease all at once. 36 00:01:23,450 --> 00:01:26,820 Yeah. Well, if anyone can handle it, he can. 37 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:28,455 It's weird. 38 00:01:28,555 --> 00:01:30,157 What? 39 00:01:31,325 --> 00:01:32,559 How well you know him. 40 00:01:32,659 --> 00:01:35,362 Of course, you do. He's your biological father. 41 00:01:35,462 --> 00:01:36,964 You know, it just takes... 42 00:01:37,064 --> 00:01:38,999 it takes me a second to remember 43 00:01:39,099 --> 00:01:41,668 that he is mine too. 44 00:01:43,770 --> 00:01:46,707 Even if I don't know him at all. 45 00:01:49,109 --> 00:01:54,014 ♪♪ 46 00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:23,410 What time is it? 47 00:02:23,510 --> 00:02:25,245 PB and J time. 48 00:02:25,345 --> 00:02:26,747 With the distance, you got 49 00:02:26,847 --> 00:02:28,715 two different jelly options there. 50 00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:32,619 -You cut off the crusts. -Yeah. 51 00:02:32,719 --> 00:02:34,655 Figured I'd use my time wisely 52 00:02:34,755 --> 00:02:38,859 while we waited for the second pregnancy test. 53 00:02:41,061 --> 00:02:42,763 Yeah. 54 00:02:42,863 --> 00:02:44,364 And? 55 00:02:46,633 --> 00:02:49,636 It's positive too. 56 00:02:49,736 --> 00:02:51,905 Okay. 57 00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:54,675 So that's for sure. 58 00:02:54,775 --> 00:02:56,843 Yeah. 59 00:02:57,778 --> 00:02:59,713 Now the question is... 60 00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:04,518 What do we do next? 61 00:03:11,558 --> 00:03:13,260 How you feeling? 62 00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:16,229 My...stomach has settled. 63 00:03:16,329 --> 00:03:18,031 I'm actually hungry. 64 00:03:18,131 --> 00:03:19,800 [both chuckle] 65 00:03:19,900 --> 00:03:21,968 That's cute, but I was... 66 00:03:22,069 --> 00:03:24,337 I was talking about here and here. 67 00:03:24,438 --> 00:03:26,840 Oh. That's what you meant. 68 00:03:26,940 --> 00:03:28,675 All feelings matter right now. 69 00:03:28,775 --> 00:03:31,111 So, there's that. 70 00:03:31,211 --> 00:03:32,679 What about you? 71 00:03:32,779 --> 00:03:34,314 I could eat. 72 00:03:34,414 --> 00:03:36,917 Look... 73 00:03:37,017 --> 00:03:39,953 Billy, you have been so sweet and attentive. 74 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:41,922 Thank you so much for fluffing my pillows 75 00:03:42,022 --> 00:03:43,557 and tucking me in my blanket. 76 00:03:43,657 --> 00:03:45,292 But you are a part of this equation too. 77 00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:48,361 I know. It just feels weird to talk about myself right now, 78 00:03:48,462 --> 00:03:50,197 -that's all. -But I'm asking you. 79 00:03:50,297 --> 00:03:51,832 Kay. 80 00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:57,270 Well, not what I expected when I woke up this morning. 81 00:03:57,370 --> 00:03:58,972 No. I mean, considering 82 00:03:59,072 --> 00:04:01,208 we're supposed to be in London right now. 83 00:04:01,308 --> 00:04:04,111 Timing was probably the night that you came back 84 00:04:04,211 --> 00:04:06,012 after you moved out. 85 00:04:07,647 --> 00:04:09,015 Yeah. Yeah. 86 00:04:09,116 --> 00:04:10,917 That would make sense. 87 00:04:11,017 --> 00:04:13,587 You didn't think that... 88 00:04:13,687 --> 00:04:16,323 maybe before today? 89 00:04:16,423 --> 00:04:19,359 I'm...mm. Not really. 90 00:04:19,459 --> 00:04:22,195 I mean, m-maybe. 91 00:04:22,295 --> 00:04:23,964 And what made you think maybe? 92 00:04:24,064 --> 00:04:26,233 I've just been feeling so different. 93 00:04:26,333 --> 00:04:27,901 Mm-hmm. 94 00:04:28,001 --> 00:04:31,838 I mean, the exhaustion is like I ran a marathon and... 95 00:04:31,938 --> 00:04:33,774 my stomach. 96 00:04:35,142 --> 00:04:37,544 And you've been here before. 97 00:04:38,979 --> 00:04:41,448 I have, yeah. 98 00:04:41,548 --> 00:04:43,517 So what's going through your head now? 99 00:04:47,888 --> 00:04:51,091 I don't know. The thoughts don't really slow down... 100 00:04:51,191 --> 00:04:52,726 enough for me to process them. 101 00:04:52,826 --> 00:04:54,327 They're just kind of whizzing by. 102 00:04:54,427 --> 00:04:56,963 And you don't have to answer anything right now. 103 00:04:57,063 --> 00:05:00,033 Okay? You have--you have time. 104 00:05:00,133 --> 00:05:02,736 Yeah, the brain is one thing, but... 105 00:05:02,836 --> 00:05:05,372 when it comes to a kid it's... 106 00:05:05,472 --> 00:05:08,175 Straight to the heart. 107 00:05:09,409 --> 00:05:11,178 I'm glad you came over. 108 00:05:11,278 --> 00:05:13,413 I would have never recognized you. 109 00:05:13,513 --> 00:05:14,948 What, you think I've changed? 110 00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:16,683 What, since you was yay high? 111 00:05:16,783 --> 00:05:18,819 Absolutely. 112 00:05:19,786 --> 00:05:23,557 Olivia bragged about you, but she never told me 113 00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:27,160 that you grew up to be such a fine-looking young man. 114 00:05:27,260 --> 00:05:28,995 [chuckles] I heard your name, 115 00:05:29,095 --> 00:05:32,399 but I'm pretty sure I would have recognized your face anyway. 116 00:05:32,499 --> 00:05:34,601 Some of your lectures are online. 117 00:05:34,701 --> 00:05:36,203 Don't tell me you've seen 'em. 118 00:05:36,303 --> 00:05:37,904 And read your papers on blood diseases. 119 00:05:38,004 --> 00:05:40,407 Oh! Was that before or after 120 00:05:40,507 --> 00:05:42,943 you stepped away from medicine? 121 00:05:43,043 --> 00:05:45,645 Before, but I'm still a fan. 122 00:05:45,745 --> 00:05:48,815 My heart ached for you when I heard about your injury. 123 00:05:50,350 --> 00:05:53,486 Having to give up surgery must have been agony. 124 00:05:53,587 --> 00:05:56,556 But leaving medicine altogether? 125 00:05:56,656 --> 00:05:58,625 That was a choice. 126 00:05:58,725 --> 00:06:00,894 A hard one, at that. 127 00:06:00,994 --> 00:06:03,663 Wow. My mother really told you all that? 128 00:06:03,763 --> 00:06:06,833 Mm-hmm. Medicine is what brought us together. 129 00:06:06,933 --> 00:06:08,869 It's part of our bond. 130 00:06:08,969 --> 00:06:10,804 You do know how proud of you 131 00:06:10,904 --> 00:06:12,906 your mother is, don't you? 132 00:06:13,006 --> 00:06:14,875 She adores you. 133 00:06:14,975 --> 00:06:16,877 Do you two talk often? 134 00:06:16,977 --> 00:06:19,212 Mm, not as much as I'd like. 135 00:06:19,312 --> 00:06:21,915 But when we do, it's partly about work. 136 00:06:22,015 --> 00:06:25,552 We mostly spend time chatting about our remarkable sons. 137 00:06:25,652 --> 00:06:27,721 -Ah. -Cheers. 138 00:06:27,821 --> 00:06:29,956 Cheers. [chuckles] 139 00:06:30,056 --> 00:06:32,993 It sounds strange to... 140 00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:35,528 to talk about our father. 141 00:06:36,696 --> 00:06:38,865 I know it's a lot to process, 142 00:06:38,965 --> 00:06:42,068 so we can go at whatever speed you want. 143 00:06:42,936 --> 00:06:45,405 Well, we, uh, might as well dive in. 144 00:06:45,505 --> 00:06:47,240 You're the expert here. 145 00:06:47,340 --> 00:06:50,610 Meaning you wanna know more about Malcolm? 146 00:06:50,710 --> 00:06:52,178 Uh, yeah. 147 00:06:52,279 --> 00:06:54,180 Okay. Um... 148 00:06:54,281 --> 00:06:58,151 well, he is my biological father, 149 00:06:58,251 --> 00:07:02,555 but my dad will always be Neil Winters. 150 00:07:02,656 --> 00:07:04,958 The, uh, portrait in the jazz lounge. 151 00:07:05,058 --> 00:07:09,296 Yes. And Malcolm was at the dedication because 152 00:07:09,396 --> 00:07:12,299 he is my dad's brother. 153 00:07:12,399 --> 00:07:14,434 Sounds like there's a story there. 154 00:07:14,534 --> 00:07:17,504 Yeah. There always is. 155 00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:19,539 We could--we could circle back, 156 00:07:19,639 --> 00:07:21,708 -or...or not. -No, I mean, 157 00:07:21,808 --> 00:07:24,878 I think the important thing for you to know 158 00:07:24,978 --> 00:07:28,081 is that Malcolm... he's a really good man. 159 00:07:29,182 --> 00:07:31,217 My mother said the same. 160 00:07:31,318 --> 00:07:33,586 It's pretty much all she said. That... 161 00:07:33,687 --> 00:07:35,989 that, and they lost touch. 162 00:07:36,089 --> 00:07:38,191 Well, I mean, that can happen with Malcolm. 163 00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:41,494 Not because he doesn't care. It's just... 164 00:07:41,594 --> 00:07:43,930 you know, he's drawn to adventure. 165 00:07:44,030 --> 00:07:46,700 Which I think is why he chose photography, 166 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:48,401 so he could travel the world. 167 00:07:48,501 --> 00:07:51,071 Well, how is he gonna handle not being able to travel? 168 00:07:51,171 --> 00:07:53,506 I mean, with all the treatment that he'll need, 169 00:07:53,606 --> 00:07:54,975 if he gets a match... 170 00:07:55,075 --> 00:07:57,577 when he gets a match, 171 00:07:57,677 --> 00:08:00,080 he won't be able to jet off. 172 00:08:00,180 --> 00:08:02,749 I mean, honestly, I think he sees 173 00:08:02,849 --> 00:08:05,685 this treatment as its own kind of adventure. 174 00:08:05,785 --> 00:08:08,688 I mean, that's just the kind of optimist he is. 175 00:08:08,788 --> 00:08:11,224 Which I think you kinda have to be 176 00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:13,526 to face the unknown the way that he does. 177 00:08:13,626 --> 00:08:16,062 I mean, look how he handled you and I not being a match, right? 178 00:08:16,162 --> 00:08:17,797 I mean, he just... 179 00:08:17,897 --> 00:08:19,499 keeps the faith and just... 180 00:08:19,599 --> 00:08:21,434 believes that things are meant to work out 181 00:08:21,534 --> 00:08:23,203 the way they're supposed to. 182 00:08:23,303 --> 00:08:25,505 Yeah, but, you know... 183 00:08:25,605 --> 00:08:27,273 some things don't work out. 184 00:08:27,374 --> 00:08:30,343 Yeah, but Malcolm doesn't see the world that way. 185 00:08:30,443 --> 00:08:32,679 You know? He just believes that 186 00:08:32,779 --> 00:08:36,649 things can be better, people can do better. 187 00:08:36,750 --> 00:08:40,153 And, I don't know, I think he thinks that because... 188 00:08:40,253 --> 00:08:41,988 of his own life. 189 00:08:42,088 --> 00:08:45,725 He's had a lot of rough spots that he's not proud of. 190 00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:48,161 That's something else that we can circle back to. 191 00:08:48,261 --> 00:08:51,297 Well, you know, you two will have your own conversation, 192 00:08:51,398 --> 00:08:54,734 I'm sure, where you can both talk about who you both are. 193 00:08:54,834 --> 00:08:57,504 If that's...what you want. 194 00:08:57,604 --> 00:08:59,806 Yeah, well, he's got a lot going on right now, 195 00:08:59,906 --> 00:09:02,108 and I assume that his... 196 00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:04,677 his treatment will be in, uh, New York? 197 00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:07,247 Yeah. I mean, I wish he would get his treatment here. 198 00:09:07,347 --> 00:09:09,716 -I told him that. -But is there any way 199 00:09:09,816 --> 00:09:12,485 that you could talk him into it? Or maybe once he's well, 200 00:09:12,585 --> 00:09:14,988 he could move back to Genoa City. 201 00:09:21,828 --> 00:09:23,696 Isn't this a treat? 202 00:09:23,797 --> 00:09:27,267 Dinner with Olivia's son. 203 00:09:27,367 --> 00:09:30,737 So, what brings you to town, Dr. Simmons? 204 00:09:30,837 --> 00:09:32,472 Oh, no, you didn't! 205 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,808 Now, you don't have to call me Aunty Stephanie, 206 00:09:34,908 --> 00:09:37,210 but you're definitely not calling me Doctor. 207 00:09:37,310 --> 00:09:38,878 Understood. [chuckles] 208 00:09:38,978 --> 00:09:41,881 What, uh, brings you back to Genoa City, Stephanie? 209 00:09:41,981 --> 00:09:43,149 Thank you. 210 00:09:43,249 --> 00:09:44,451 It was time. 211 00:09:44,551 --> 00:09:46,486 So you haven't been back since you moved away? 212 00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:48,388 Feels like forever. 213 00:09:48,488 --> 00:09:51,925 After all, I mean, this is where my life started. 214 00:09:52,025 --> 00:09:53,593 My career took off. 215 00:09:53,693 --> 00:09:55,328 Lifelong connections. 216 00:09:55,428 --> 00:09:57,297 Then memories are what brought you back. 217 00:09:57,397 --> 00:09:59,265 Uh, only partly. 218 00:09:59,365 --> 00:10:01,034 I'm actually here to see my son. 219 00:10:01,134 --> 00:10:03,403 You might know him. Holden Novak. 220 00:10:05,171 --> 00:10:07,040 -Holden is your son? -Yes. 221 00:10:07,140 --> 00:10:10,009 -Have you two met? -Uh, a few times. 222 00:10:10,110 --> 00:10:11,878 Oh. That's wonderful. 223 00:10:11,978 --> 00:10:14,214 I don't know him well, though. 224 00:10:14,314 --> 00:10:17,517 Well, maybe that can change down the road. 225 00:10:17,617 --> 00:10:21,321 All right, so, uh, what should we have? 226 00:10:25,358 --> 00:10:27,660 Look, Malcolm is... 227 00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:29,362 a free spirit. 228 00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:31,564 He has always been that way. 229 00:10:31,664 --> 00:10:35,034 But he doesn't have to be in physical proximity with someone 230 00:10:35,135 --> 00:10:37,203 to feel close to them. 231 00:10:37,303 --> 00:10:42,408 You know, his love and affection can be there even if he isn't. 232 00:10:42,509 --> 00:10:45,745 But you do still wish that he got his medical care here. 233 00:10:47,046 --> 00:10:50,683 Yeah, but, I mean, doesn't matter what I think. 234 00:10:50,783 --> 00:10:53,820 You know, at the end of the day, he has to feel comfortable. 235 00:10:53,920 --> 00:10:55,922 I've dealt with my own medical issues, 236 00:10:56,022 --> 00:10:57,924 and I understand how important it is 237 00:10:58,024 --> 00:11:00,493 to be comfortable in your surroundings for your recovery. 238 00:11:00,593 --> 00:11:04,631 So, you know, if that's New York for him, 239 00:11:04,731 --> 00:11:07,000 then so be it. 240 00:11:07,100 --> 00:11:08,601 But at the end of the day, 241 00:11:08,701 --> 00:11:10,670 we still have to find him a match. 242 00:11:11,571 --> 00:11:13,406 That's what it all goes back to. 243 00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:14,908 Yep. 244 00:11:17,277 --> 00:11:18,978 Makes sense, though, that... 245 00:11:19,078 --> 00:11:21,114 you want him to be close to you. 246 00:11:21,214 --> 00:11:24,751 I was just...I was just asking since you mentioned it. 247 00:11:24,851 --> 00:11:28,688 Okay, well, then, I'll just ask you directly. 248 00:11:28,788 --> 00:11:32,125 Are you hoping to have a relationship with him? 249 00:11:35,962 --> 00:11:39,599 Mint tea. Easy on the stomach. No caffeine. 250 00:11:40,567 --> 00:11:42,569 Thank you. 251 00:11:42,669 --> 00:11:45,872 It's a far cry from sipping champagne on the jet, isn't it? 252 00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:50,577 And I promise you, I will not have sushi until you're able to. 253 00:11:51,945 --> 00:11:54,581 You're avoiding me. 254 00:11:54,681 --> 00:11:56,616 I'm right here. 255 00:11:56,716 --> 00:11:59,686 But you're not telling me how you really feel. 256 00:11:59,786 --> 00:12:02,121 Look, I get I can't make you open up, 257 00:12:02,222 --> 00:12:04,591 and I know it's a lot to process, but... 258 00:12:06,259 --> 00:12:08,728 I'm just feeling really alone right now, 259 00:12:08,828 --> 00:12:11,564 and that is not a judgment or a criticism on you at all. 260 00:12:11,664 --> 00:12:14,300 I just... 261 00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:17,303 maybe it's a request. 262 00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:19,405 Can you please be here... 263 00:12:19,505 --> 00:12:22,242 in this...with me? 264 00:12:24,911 --> 00:12:28,214 So Audra didn't come over for work today, did she? 265 00:12:28,314 --> 00:12:31,718 She brought you a test? Is that what happened? 266 00:12:31,818 --> 00:12:35,922 I just needed an answer before I said anything. 267 00:12:36,022 --> 00:12:39,292 And then you kicked me out because you needed a friend. 268 00:12:40,727 --> 00:12:42,395 Yeah. 269 00:12:42,495 --> 00:12:44,631 I get it. 270 00:12:44,731 --> 00:12:47,934 You wanted that friend to be you. 271 00:12:48,034 --> 00:12:49,669 It's a thought. 272 00:12:52,272 --> 00:12:53,806 Billy... 273 00:12:53,906 --> 00:12:55,575 I... 274 00:12:55,675 --> 00:12:57,810 I don't know, okay? I-I-I... 275 00:12:57,910 --> 00:12:59,879 I thought I was protecting you. 276 00:12:59,979 --> 00:13:02,515 I just didn't want you to go on this roller coaster with me 277 00:13:02,615 --> 00:13:03,950 until I knew for sure. 278 00:13:04,050 --> 00:13:07,153 -We don't have to talk about it. -No, we--we... 279 00:13:07,253 --> 00:13:11,190 we do, okay, because we're both in this together. 280 00:13:12,525 --> 00:13:14,360 You woke up this morning, 281 00:13:14,460 --> 00:13:17,397 and you had your suspicions, and you called Audra. 282 00:13:17,497 --> 00:13:21,634 And I get that. I understand why you would... 283 00:13:21,734 --> 00:13:24,671 wanna wait to tell me that you were pregnant. 284 00:13:24,771 --> 00:13:26,539 It was all out of love. 285 00:13:26,639 --> 00:13:30,376 I'm not being defensive, okay? I'm really not. 286 00:13:33,212 --> 00:13:37,350 But you were afraid to tell me that you were pregnant. 287 00:13:39,319 --> 00:13:41,254 And if that's the case, 288 00:13:41,354 --> 00:13:45,692 then what does that say about us going forward? 289 00:13:51,297 --> 00:13:53,166 I wanna be someone you can count on. 290 00:13:53,266 --> 00:13:55,601 You are, Billy. 291 00:13:55,702 --> 00:13:57,103 And I do, okay? 292 00:13:57,203 --> 00:14:00,506 I-I absolutely know what a wonderful father you are. 293 00:14:00,606 --> 00:14:02,041 You don't have to bolster my ego. 294 00:14:02,141 --> 00:14:05,144 -It must be coming out wrong. -Hey, I'm not doing that, okay? 295 00:14:06,412 --> 00:14:08,781 I'm not. I'm just telling you what I see. 296 00:14:08,881 --> 00:14:11,684 And I see a very loving and sweet and protective man 297 00:14:11,784 --> 00:14:14,587 who looks after the children in his life-- 298 00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:16,656 Johnny and Katie. 299 00:14:16,756 --> 00:14:18,925 And Connor--even after everything that happened 300 00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:21,327 with Chelsea and Adam. 301 00:14:21,427 --> 00:14:23,229 Well, I love them. 302 00:14:23,329 --> 00:14:25,732 And when you love something, you take care of it. 303 00:14:27,567 --> 00:14:31,471 I love you. And I wanna do that for you. 304 00:14:31,571 --> 00:14:36,175 You have been such a gift to me, one that I did not expect. 305 00:14:36,275 --> 00:14:38,678 And of course you're brave and you're strong, 306 00:14:38,778 --> 00:14:41,047 but it's your heart, it's massive... 307 00:14:41,147 --> 00:14:44,317 and it's open even though it's been knocked around 308 00:14:44,417 --> 00:14:46,819 more than once. 309 00:14:46,919 --> 00:14:49,922 But you need to know that you're never gonna be alone... 310 00:14:50,022 --> 00:14:52,225 again, okay? 311 00:14:52,325 --> 00:14:55,194 Unless you want to, unless you need to. 312 00:14:55,294 --> 00:14:58,631 Then I'll be right there, supporting you and watching you 313 00:14:58,731 --> 00:15:00,800 do your thing. 314 00:15:01,801 --> 00:15:04,203 But if you need someone... 315 00:15:04,303 --> 00:15:07,039 I'm not going anywhere. 316 00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:09,876 Come here. 317 00:15:14,647 --> 00:15:16,249 One... 318 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:22,755 One of the things 319 00:15:22,855 --> 00:15:26,092 that I talked to Audra about, 320 00:15:26,192 --> 00:15:28,694 one of the reasons why I didn't tell you 321 00:15:28,795 --> 00:15:32,331 when I woke up this morning... 322 00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:34,967 [whispers] Ava. 323 00:15:37,837 --> 00:15:40,506 I'm sorry, Sally. 324 00:15:40,606 --> 00:15:43,242 You've al--[exhales] you've already been through 325 00:15:43,342 --> 00:15:46,312 so much with Delia. 326 00:15:46,412 --> 00:15:48,214 And we... 327 00:15:48,314 --> 00:15:52,418 lost the two most precious little people. 328 00:15:54,587 --> 00:15:57,723 I mean, how can we face that chance again? 329 00:16:02,395 --> 00:16:04,363 A relationship with Malcolm. 330 00:16:04,464 --> 00:16:05,665 [chuckles] 331 00:16:05,765 --> 00:16:08,334 I-I don't even know what that looks like. 332 00:16:08,434 --> 00:16:11,537 Well, makes sense that you would want one. 333 00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:13,072 Does it? 334 00:16:14,740 --> 00:16:16,909 I guess it's a little late. I mean, the... 335 00:16:17,009 --> 00:16:19,912 the man is sick, and he has other things on his mind, so... 336 00:16:20,012 --> 00:16:21,647 Yeah. That doesn't mean that you're not too. 337 00:16:21,747 --> 00:16:23,149 He wouldn't want you to think that way. 338 00:16:23,249 --> 00:16:26,452 I-I don't resent him, and I don't blame him. 339 00:16:26,552 --> 00:16:29,489 It's nothing like that. But my mother... 340 00:16:29,589 --> 00:16:31,090 my mother holding this back 341 00:16:31,190 --> 00:16:33,192 and not telling me until Malcolm needed something-- 342 00:16:33,292 --> 00:16:35,495 I don't know how to feel about that part. 343 00:16:37,530 --> 00:16:38,931 Look... 344 00:16:39,031 --> 00:16:41,133 I know that Stephanie 345 00:16:41,234 --> 00:16:43,836 feels like a weight has been lifted, 346 00:16:43,936 --> 00:16:46,606 but she also feels a lot of remorse too. 347 00:16:46,706 --> 00:16:48,808 And I hate to be mad at her, but... 348 00:16:48,908 --> 00:16:51,277 and I know, I know how heavy that secret is to carry. 349 00:16:51,377 --> 00:16:52,778 It's okay. It's your life. 350 00:16:52,879 --> 00:16:54,647 You can feel however you wanna feel. 351 00:16:54,747 --> 00:16:57,149 Except I'm not sure what that is. 352 00:16:57,250 --> 00:16:59,051 I get it, okay? 353 00:16:59,151 --> 00:17:01,754 You're feeling a lot of emotions, and it's scary. 354 00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:04,223 Because when you've spent your life trying to 355 00:17:04,323 --> 00:17:06,259 keep things drama-free, 356 00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:09,529 feeling all this anger, it's uncomfortable. 357 00:17:09,629 --> 00:17:11,697 Well, if you're trying to tell me that it's okay for me 358 00:17:11,797 --> 00:17:14,333 to be angry at my mother... 359 00:17:14,433 --> 00:17:17,003 I'm not sure I could fight it if I tried. 360 00:17:18,070 --> 00:17:20,907 Tell me about your new career. 361 00:17:21,007 --> 00:17:25,111 You look like a man who's pretty happy with his life. 362 00:17:25,211 --> 00:17:27,813 Uh, business is great. 363 00:17:27,914 --> 00:17:31,150 Working at Winters with my family--that's going well. 364 00:17:31,250 --> 00:17:34,720 But, uh, growing up, seeing what people like my mom and you 365 00:17:34,820 --> 00:17:38,124 brought to this world-- I couldn't wait to do the same. 366 00:17:38,224 --> 00:17:43,262 And I loved being a doctor for a long time, but... 367 00:17:43,362 --> 00:17:46,132 I'm not sure I ever developed the layer that... 368 00:17:46,232 --> 00:17:48,234 gets you through the loss of a patient. 369 00:17:48,334 --> 00:17:52,104 Yeah. A painful fact for all of us. 370 00:17:52,204 --> 00:17:55,308 Maybe that's why when surgery was no longer an option, 371 00:17:55,408 --> 00:17:57,443 I was able to move on. 372 00:17:57,543 --> 00:17:59,712 People get saved through medicine without surgery 373 00:17:59,812 --> 00:18:01,581 every day. 374 00:18:01,681 --> 00:18:03,649 -But I love what I do now too. -Good. 375 00:18:03,749 --> 00:18:07,286 Get to work with my family, you know, building a legacy. 376 00:18:07,386 --> 00:18:11,057 Creating jobs where people can pay the mortgage, 377 00:18:11,157 --> 00:18:14,226 go to a doctor, buy groceries. 378 00:18:14,327 --> 00:18:16,262 I found satisfaction and purpose, 379 00:18:16,362 --> 00:18:18,230 and like you said, I'm happy. 380 00:18:18,331 --> 00:18:20,700 And I have great appreciation 381 00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:22,602 for medical professionals still in it, 382 00:18:22,702 --> 00:18:25,037 -fighting the good fight. -Against... 383 00:18:25,137 --> 00:18:27,840 disease, fear, injury. 384 00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:31,444 Neglect. Also time. 385 00:18:31,544 --> 00:18:33,379 But when it works... 386 00:18:33,479 --> 00:18:37,283 when you get to keep another soul in this world 387 00:18:37,383 --> 00:18:39,719 to watch another sunset... 388 00:18:39,819 --> 00:18:43,823 to have one more day with the people in their hearts... 389 00:18:43,923 --> 00:18:45,524 it's science, yes, 390 00:18:45,625 --> 00:18:48,427 but it's also magic. 391 00:18:48,527 --> 00:18:50,930 But you're right. When it doesn't work, 392 00:18:51,030 --> 00:18:53,566 when you can't pull it off, 393 00:18:53,666 --> 00:18:58,504 when the universe doesn't respond to our efforts... 394 00:18:58,604 --> 00:19:01,140 there's nothing worse. 395 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:03,943 How am I supposed to feel when I look back at my childhood? 396 00:19:04,043 --> 00:19:06,846 I hated being the kid whose dad was dead, 397 00:19:06,946 --> 00:19:09,582 and that is exactly what I was. 398 00:19:09,682 --> 00:19:11,717 My teachers knew it. Students knew it. 399 00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:13,586 Their parents knew it. 400 00:19:13,686 --> 00:19:16,222 And, sure, there were a bunch of parents who were divorced 401 00:19:16,322 --> 00:19:18,691 and maybe some kid's parent traveled for work, 402 00:19:18,791 --> 00:19:21,427 but there was no one else like me-- 403 00:19:21,527 --> 00:19:23,829 the kid with the dead dad. 404 00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:27,733 And, sure, you know, I heard all of the stories 405 00:19:27,833 --> 00:19:30,569 about the great Dr. Jerry Novak 406 00:19:30,670 --> 00:19:32,772 and I saw the photos. 407 00:19:33,739 --> 00:19:38,177 But when I heard other kids talking about their fathers... 408 00:19:38,277 --> 00:19:39,812 when I saw how their dads 409 00:19:39,912 --> 00:19:42,581 would show up to their school performances 410 00:19:42,682 --> 00:19:46,152 or their games... 411 00:19:46,252 --> 00:19:47,853 My mother doesn't know this. 412 00:19:47,953 --> 00:19:50,923 I used to lie about my father, 413 00:19:51,023 --> 00:19:52,892 pretending that he was alive... 414 00:19:52,992 --> 00:19:55,628 that he was this amazing guy. 415 00:19:55,728 --> 00:19:58,431 I'm making up all these stories about the... 416 00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:01,567 the things we would do together. 417 00:20:01,667 --> 00:20:04,804 Fishing. Playing catch. 418 00:20:04,904 --> 00:20:07,173 It must have been really lonely 419 00:20:07,273 --> 00:20:10,409 feeling like you had to hide the truth about your life. 420 00:20:10,509 --> 00:20:13,746 It was easier than being pitied. 421 00:20:13,846 --> 00:20:15,181 Having a dead parent-- 422 00:20:15,281 --> 00:20:18,451 it's the kind of thing that kids worry is contagious, 423 00:20:18,551 --> 00:20:20,886 as if it's something that they could catch 424 00:20:20,986 --> 00:20:23,889 and that could happen to them. 425 00:20:23,989 --> 00:20:26,158 Look, you can't... 426 00:20:26,258 --> 00:20:29,995 undo those moments of loneliness. 427 00:20:30,096 --> 00:20:32,331 But Malcolm is a good person. 428 00:20:32,431 --> 00:20:34,700 He's someone you can talk to, you know, 429 00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:36,702 and he'll want what's best for you, 430 00:20:36,802 --> 00:20:38,437 whatever that will look like. 431 00:20:38,537 --> 00:20:40,806 But we won't get those years back, will we? 432 00:20:41,941 --> 00:20:45,211 And we don't know how many more we have left, do we? 433 00:20:45,311 --> 00:20:48,347 I mean, that is the reality we're talking about here, right? 434 00:20:48,447 --> 00:20:52,384 That Malcolm and I were both robbed. 435 00:20:52,485 --> 00:20:55,254 And that won't ever change. 436 00:21:00,459 --> 00:21:01,961 Remember when we were just two people that didn't 437 00:21:02,061 --> 00:21:03,629 know each other very well 438 00:21:03,729 --> 00:21:05,865 but we had too much in common? 439 00:21:05,965 --> 00:21:08,033 Yeah. We had a lot of talks 440 00:21:08,134 --> 00:21:10,202 when Adam and Chelsea were in Baltimore. 441 00:21:10,302 --> 00:21:12,438 Telling ourselves and each other 442 00:21:12,538 --> 00:21:14,740 that everything was gonna be okay. 443 00:21:16,008 --> 00:21:17,476 And stories. 444 00:21:17,576 --> 00:21:20,179 And Ava. 445 00:21:20,279 --> 00:21:22,615 And you understood. 446 00:21:22,715 --> 00:21:24,416 'Cause of Delia. 447 00:21:26,352 --> 00:21:28,554 I still dream about her. 448 00:21:28,654 --> 00:21:31,524 The age that she was, the age that she would be now. 449 00:21:32,758 --> 00:21:34,460 Do you ever? 450 00:21:36,128 --> 00:21:38,063 Yeah. 451 00:21:38,164 --> 00:21:41,767 Ava would be turning three. 452 00:21:43,402 --> 00:21:47,106 Sometimes I swear I... 453 00:21:47,206 --> 00:21:49,575 I can hear her in my dreams. 454 00:21:50,709 --> 00:21:54,313 Her laugh. Her...talking. 455 00:21:54,413 --> 00:21:56,949 And my whole body just knows it's her. 456 00:21:59,418 --> 00:22:02,087 I like to think that D's with Katherine. 457 00:22:02,955 --> 00:22:05,558 I hope she's proud of me. 458 00:22:05,658 --> 00:22:07,860 How could she not be? 459 00:22:08,994 --> 00:22:11,597 Well, because I failed her siblings. 460 00:22:11,697 --> 00:22:13,365 I don't need you to defend me. 461 00:22:13,465 --> 00:22:15,734 I'm just saying it's true, you know? 462 00:22:16,735 --> 00:22:18,804 I mean, I've made mistakes. 463 00:22:19,972 --> 00:22:23,342 I've said things, I've done things. I've... 464 00:22:23,442 --> 00:22:26,545 reacted in ways... 465 00:22:26,645 --> 00:22:29,415 and I cared more about myself than I did them. 466 00:22:30,749 --> 00:22:32,718 And I'm not beating myself up, 467 00:22:32,818 --> 00:22:35,287 but I'm also not letting myself off the hook. 468 00:22:35,387 --> 00:22:38,991 I mean, I'm human, you know. I'm gonna make mistakes, but... 469 00:22:40,893 --> 00:22:44,663 I'm a father, so I need to try harder. 470 00:22:47,867 --> 00:22:50,636 I'm so afraid of failure sometimes, but... 471 00:22:51,570 --> 00:22:55,608 You know, when you're a father, you--when you're a parent-- 472 00:22:55,708 --> 00:22:58,077 you quickly realize that it's not about you 473 00:22:58,177 --> 00:23:00,779 and you gotta get the hell out of the way 474 00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:03,449 for their sake. 475 00:23:03,549 --> 00:23:06,585 So that's me. 476 00:23:06,685 --> 00:23:08,988 That's where I'm at. 477 00:23:09,088 --> 00:23:11,056 But you gotta trust me when I tell you 478 00:23:11,156 --> 00:23:14,126 it's your feelings that matter the most. 479 00:23:14,226 --> 00:23:16,128 -It's not just me. -No, listen. 480 00:23:16,228 --> 00:23:18,330 Your heart takes priority, okay? 481 00:23:18,430 --> 00:23:21,500 'Cause you carried Ava and you didn't get to raise her. 482 00:23:24,470 --> 00:23:26,405 So you gotta be thinking about that again. 483 00:23:28,841 --> 00:23:32,411 I'm telling you that we can do everything right, 484 00:23:32,511 --> 00:23:35,214 and still... 485 00:23:37,716 --> 00:23:39,852 Are you willing to risk that again? 486 00:23:42,354 --> 00:23:45,424 So I really think that Devon and Nate 487 00:23:45,524 --> 00:23:46,959 need to know. 488 00:23:47,059 --> 00:23:50,930 -About me? -Yeah. I mean, they're family. 489 00:23:51,030 --> 00:23:53,098 Nate and I have a biological connection 490 00:23:53,198 --> 00:23:55,935 because his mom and my mom were sisters. 491 00:23:56,035 --> 00:23:59,838 And then my family adopted Devon when he was a teenager. 492 00:23:59,939 --> 00:24:02,908 So I'm not blood-related then. 493 00:24:03,008 --> 00:24:05,711 Blood, no, but... 494 00:24:05,811 --> 00:24:08,480 Malcolm was married to Nate's mom, Olivia. 495 00:24:08,580 --> 00:24:12,151 So they're gonna see you as extended family. 496 00:24:12,251 --> 00:24:14,720 You don't--you don't know that. 497 00:24:14,820 --> 00:24:16,855 Yeah. That's just the way it is with our family. 498 00:24:16,956 --> 00:24:19,858 But there's no guarantees that that'll be the case this time. 499 00:24:19,959 --> 00:24:22,328 Well, I do think that they need to know. 500 00:24:22,428 --> 00:24:25,764 And I would love to tell them as soon as possible. 501 00:24:25,864 --> 00:24:27,733 Like now, if that's okay. 502 00:24:27,833 --> 00:24:30,269 And you want me to be there when you tell them? 503 00:24:30,369 --> 00:24:33,072 I mean, I think that's best, don't you? 504 00:24:33,172 --> 00:24:37,076 I mean, best is beyond me right now, 505 00:24:37,176 --> 00:24:39,111 and so is the worst, for that matter. 506 00:24:39,211 --> 00:24:40,679 I just know that I, uh... 507 00:24:42,281 --> 00:24:44,650 I wanna be in the loop from now on. 508 00:24:45,751 --> 00:24:47,786 Okay. So... 509 00:24:47,886 --> 00:24:49,888 can I call them right now? 510 00:24:51,824 --> 00:24:54,360 There's, uh, no time like the present. 511 00:24:55,694 --> 00:24:57,730 So I heard the movie theater's now a café? 512 00:24:57,830 --> 00:25:00,099 [phone rings] 513 00:25:01,567 --> 00:25:03,502 I'm sorry. Do you mind? This might be work. 514 00:25:03,602 --> 00:25:05,537 Oh, sure, go ahead. 515 00:25:07,072 --> 00:25:08,474 Hey, Lily. What's going on? 516 00:25:08,574 --> 00:25:11,377 Hey, I need to see you and Devon, if you have time. 517 00:25:11,477 --> 00:25:13,112 Everything okay? 518 00:25:13,212 --> 00:25:15,247 Um, a family meeting. Not business. 519 00:25:15,347 --> 00:25:18,484 But sooner is better, so, uh, can you come to Society? 520 00:25:18,584 --> 00:25:20,886 Uh, yeah. Gimme a few. 521 00:25:20,986 --> 00:25:22,654 I'll see you soon. 522 00:25:24,323 --> 00:25:26,158 -Everything okay? -Yeah. 523 00:25:26,258 --> 00:25:29,128 Sorry about that, Stephanie. Uh, that was my cousin Lily. 524 00:25:29,228 --> 00:25:31,497 I need to head out to meet with her. 525 00:25:31,597 --> 00:25:33,198 You've been wonderful, Nate. 526 00:25:33,298 --> 00:25:36,135 Look, I hope I run into you before you leave. 527 00:25:36,235 --> 00:25:37,236 That would be lovely. 528 00:25:37,336 --> 00:25:39,171 Well, don't you be late on account of me. 529 00:25:39,271 --> 00:25:40,472 I'll take care of the check. 530 00:25:40,572 --> 00:25:42,574 It's already taken care of. 531 00:25:42,674 --> 00:25:44,109 You shouldn't have. 532 00:25:44,209 --> 00:25:45,978 You're my mother's dear friend. 533 00:25:46,078 --> 00:25:47,846 We're practically family. Come on. 534 00:25:47,946 --> 00:25:50,149 -Thank you. -Any time. 535 00:25:50,249 --> 00:25:52,684 -See you soon? -Yes. 536 00:26:01,427 --> 00:26:02,928 -NATE: Hey. -LILY: Hey. 537 00:26:03,028 --> 00:26:04,963 I, uh, thought this was a family thing. 538 00:26:05,064 --> 00:26:07,066 Yeah, uh, I'll explain. 539 00:26:07,166 --> 00:26:10,903 Okay, so, what? It's the four of us? 540 00:26:11,003 --> 00:26:13,238 What's up, Holden? 541 00:26:13,338 --> 00:26:15,007 Um, can we sit down? 542 00:26:15,107 --> 00:26:17,743 Just 'cause this is an important conversation, 543 00:26:17,843 --> 00:26:20,279 -so sit, sit. -DEVON: Sure. All right. 544 00:26:20,379 --> 00:26:22,748 I won't drag it out. I promise. 545 00:26:26,952 --> 00:26:29,721 Um, so Holden and I found out 546 00:26:29,822 --> 00:26:33,725 some...news recently. 547 00:26:33,826 --> 00:26:37,196 Um, it turns out that 548 00:26:37,296 --> 00:26:41,834 Malcolm is his biological father. 549 00:26:41,934 --> 00:26:45,737 So we are half-siblings. 550 00:26:45,838 --> 00:26:47,539 Malcolm? 551 00:26:47,639 --> 00:26:50,275 -Malcolm is your father? -According to who? 552 00:26:50,375 --> 00:26:53,078 That would be my mother, Stephanie Simmons. 553 00:26:53,178 --> 00:26:56,415 She used to live here, and she--she knew Malcolm. 554 00:26:56,515 --> 00:26:58,750 And your parents and Nate's mom. 555 00:26:58,851 --> 00:27:00,986 So you're saying this happened while Malcolm 556 00:27:01,086 --> 00:27:02,754 was still married to Olivia? 557 00:27:02,855 --> 00:27:04,423 -He wouldn't. -He didn't. 558 00:27:04,523 --> 00:27:06,658 My mother was, uh, she'd left town 559 00:27:06,758 --> 00:27:08,594 by the time Olivia and Malcolm got together. 560 00:27:08,694 --> 00:27:10,662 That's why she was in town. 561 00:27:10,762 --> 00:27:12,364 Your mother. 562 00:27:12,464 --> 00:27:14,733 I was just with Stephanie. 563 00:27:14,833 --> 00:27:16,935 Sorry. Dr. Simmons. 564 00:27:17,035 --> 00:27:19,471 Because of her connection to my mom. 565 00:27:19,571 --> 00:27:22,407 She mentioned Holden but she never mentioned Malcolm. 566 00:27:22,508 --> 00:27:25,010 So hang on. You just found this out? 567 00:27:25,110 --> 00:27:27,346 Yeah. My mother came to tell me. 568 00:27:27,446 --> 00:27:29,081 Malcolm just found out as well. 569 00:27:29,181 --> 00:27:31,250 And he just happened to be in town too? 570 00:27:31,350 --> 00:27:32,885 That's a lot of coincidences. 571 00:27:32,985 --> 00:27:35,587 Well, Stephanie has her reasons for sharing it. 572 00:27:35,687 --> 00:27:37,890 But the point is is that 573 00:27:37,990 --> 00:27:42,995 Holden is family to me now, so he's family to all of us. 574 00:27:44,129 --> 00:27:45,797 Look, I'm sure you have a lot of questions, 575 00:27:45,898 --> 00:27:48,233 but you know almost everything that we do, so... 576 00:27:48,333 --> 00:27:50,602 Oh, we know almost everything? 577 00:27:50,702 --> 00:27:53,605 That'll have to be enough for now. 578 00:27:53,705 --> 00:27:56,842 Now that you all have the headlines, I will... 579 00:27:56,942 --> 00:27:58,277 I'll give you some privacy. 580 00:27:58,377 --> 00:28:00,579 -No, you don't have to leave. -No, it's fine. 581 00:28:00,679 --> 00:28:03,582 My mother would like an update. And I'm sure... 582 00:28:03,682 --> 00:28:05,651 I'm sure you would all like to talk. 583 00:28:11,623 --> 00:28:14,059 So tell me how you really feel. 584 00:28:17,629 --> 00:28:19,531 You've always known 585 00:28:19,631 --> 00:28:22,568 what losing Ava did to me. 586 00:28:22,668 --> 00:28:25,504 Feeling like I was never gonna be whole again. 587 00:28:26,438 --> 00:28:29,975 Feeling like I was marked. 588 00:28:30,075 --> 00:28:32,711 Like people would just look at me and they would just know 589 00:28:32,811 --> 00:28:34,846 that I was...broken. 590 00:28:39,084 --> 00:28:41,453 [whispering] When I lost Ava... 591 00:28:41,553 --> 00:28:43,388 I lost myself. 592 00:28:45,157 --> 00:28:46,692 And a million little moments 593 00:28:46,792 --> 00:28:48,894 that we were never gonna get to have together. 594 00:28:50,395 --> 00:28:52,464 And I know 595 00:28:52,564 --> 00:28:54,733 that I would have messed up as her mom. 596 00:28:56,201 --> 00:28:59,371 I know it, and I would have tried to do better. 597 00:29:02,274 --> 00:29:05,978 But either way, I would have loved her with all of my heart. 598 00:29:09,314 --> 00:29:11,717 But I never got that chance. 599 00:29:14,886 --> 00:29:16,755 I survived. 600 00:29:18,357 --> 00:29:23,328 And I felt so guilty and ashamed for surviving. 601 00:29:32,571 --> 00:29:34,339 I'm grateful you're here. 602 00:29:36,375 --> 00:29:38,710 How do I do it again? 603 00:29:41,013 --> 00:29:44,983 I mean, what if all I feel is fear? 604 00:29:45,951 --> 00:29:48,420 I mean, what does that do to the baby? 605 00:29:48,520 --> 00:29:50,956 You know, what if I can't dream or what if I can't hope 606 00:29:51,056 --> 00:29:53,625 or what if I can't... get excited? 607 00:29:53,725 --> 00:29:58,964 And if I do get excited and I do dream and I do... 608 00:30:00,632 --> 00:30:05,570 ...fall in love before she or... 609 00:30:05,671 --> 00:30:08,006 [laughs] he... 610 00:30:08,106 --> 00:30:11,276 even has a name, I mean, what-- 611 00:30:12,944 --> 00:30:15,213 What if it happens again? 612 00:30:18,417 --> 00:30:20,152 But I... 613 00:30:21,920 --> 00:30:25,590 I do know that you're gonna... 614 00:30:25,691 --> 00:30:27,726 you're gonna be there. 615 00:30:27,826 --> 00:30:30,662 Being with you, Sally... 616 00:30:30,762 --> 00:30:32,964 is all I can ask for. 617 00:30:41,273 --> 00:30:44,443 You didn't tell me that you were seeing Nate. 618 00:30:44,543 --> 00:30:45,644 I didn't know it myself. 619 00:30:45,744 --> 00:30:49,081 I was at the bar having a drink. He heard my name. 620 00:30:49,181 --> 00:30:52,451 -We just started talking. -And he didn't say anything 621 00:30:52,551 --> 00:30:55,587 about how I rubbed him and Devon the wrong way, huh? 622 00:30:55,687 --> 00:30:58,156 When. [laughs] How? 623 00:30:58,256 --> 00:31:00,625 Son, are you just making assumptions? 624 00:31:00,726 --> 00:31:02,828 Because he didn't say anything like that. 625 00:31:02,928 --> 00:31:05,230 That's fair. It's just that I have a history 626 00:31:05,330 --> 00:31:07,666 with some people here, which means I might not be 627 00:31:07,766 --> 00:31:12,137 on the invite list for the family dinner anytime soon. 628 00:31:12,237 --> 00:31:14,573 If ever. 629 00:31:14,673 --> 00:31:16,675 So you're calling Holden family, 630 00:31:16,775 --> 00:31:19,244 but, like, Tucker's technically our family. 631 00:31:19,344 --> 00:31:21,313 So you hear where I'm going with this, right? 632 00:31:21,413 --> 00:31:22,981 -Yes. -Okay. 633 00:31:23,081 --> 00:31:25,617 What are you thinking where Holden's concerned? 634 00:31:25,717 --> 00:31:29,187 I don't know. I mean, there's time to figure that out. 635 00:31:29,287 --> 00:31:31,089 I say this with love and respect, 636 00:31:31,189 --> 00:31:33,792 but Damian is proof that time isn't infinite. 637 00:31:33,892 --> 00:31:35,293 And I'm not trying to push you 638 00:31:35,394 --> 00:31:37,996 one way or the other, Lily, but... 639 00:31:38,096 --> 00:31:40,165 You know what? Forget I said anything. 640 00:31:40,265 --> 00:31:42,467 This is your decision. 641 00:31:42,567 --> 00:31:46,071 No, I agree about the time thing, but I just... 642 00:31:46,171 --> 00:31:48,673 I have a lot that I'm thinking about right now, 643 00:31:48,774 --> 00:31:50,475 so everything else will have to wait. 644 00:31:50,575 --> 00:31:53,845 -Is this about Cane again? -What's he done now? 645 00:31:53,945 --> 00:31:55,514 No, it's not Cane. 646 00:31:55,614 --> 00:31:57,048 Well, then, it's gotta be about Malcolm. 647 00:31:57,149 --> 00:31:59,651 The guy shows up to town and then leaves right away 648 00:31:59,751 --> 00:32:01,453 even though he has a son he didn't know about that's here? 649 00:32:01,553 --> 00:32:03,922 Is Devon right? 650 00:32:04,022 --> 00:32:06,224 We can't help unless you tell us. 651 00:32:06,324 --> 00:32:08,393 [phone rings] 652 00:32:11,263 --> 00:32:13,765 Oh, it's Malcolm. I have to take this. 653 00:32:15,967 --> 00:32:20,505 Malcolm, hi. Um, did you get the information? 654 00:32:22,774 --> 00:32:25,143 What were the results? 655 00:32:33,485 --> 00:32:36,621 You know, people don't mean any harm... 656 00:32:36,721 --> 00:32:40,926 But when you lose a child and someone says, "I can't imagine," 657 00:32:41,026 --> 00:32:42,928 they're right, they can't. 658 00:32:43,028 --> 00:32:48,333 There might be a fear in the back of your head, but... 659 00:32:48,433 --> 00:32:51,470 it's a million times worse than that fear. 660 00:32:54,039 --> 00:32:55,540 Yeah, that's true. 661 00:32:57,142 --> 00:32:59,978 But if the best happens instead of the worst... 662 00:33:00,078 --> 00:33:03,181 and you get to carry that little life in your hands... 663 00:33:04,816 --> 00:33:07,319 You get a chance to do everything right... 664 00:33:08,820 --> 00:33:11,323 But you're still gonna fumble every now and again. 665 00:33:13,291 --> 00:33:16,127 Well, "being human means making mistakes." 666 00:33:17,529 --> 00:33:20,065 "Being a parent means trying to do better." 667 00:33:21,500 --> 00:33:23,502 No, that's good. I mean, that's profound. 668 00:33:23,602 --> 00:33:26,705 Who said that? I'm gonna steal that one. 669 00:33:26,805 --> 00:33:29,274 I will write it down for you later. 670 00:33:32,644 --> 00:33:34,279 Appreciate you. 671 00:33:37,015 --> 00:33:39,618 Can we do the rest of this later too? 672 00:33:41,052 --> 00:33:43,088 Talking, thinking, figuring out what comes next? 673 00:33:43,188 --> 00:33:45,156 Heck, yeah. 674 00:33:45,257 --> 00:33:48,560 We'll go side by side as a team? 675 00:33:48,660 --> 00:33:51,196 You make that sound like a question. 676 00:33:51,296 --> 00:33:53,098 That's a certainty. 677 00:33:54,399 --> 00:33:57,969 We will go side by side. 678 00:33:58,069 --> 00:34:00,071 As a team. 679 00:34:00,171 --> 00:34:02,240 Always. 680 00:34:06,311 --> 00:34:09,047 This is none of your doing or choice--it was all mine. 681 00:34:09,147 --> 00:34:11,416 So if you need me to help you to smooth things out-- 682 00:34:11,516 --> 00:34:13,418 What does that say if I need my mother 683 00:34:13,518 --> 00:34:15,053 to handle this for me? 684 00:34:15,153 --> 00:34:18,356 And whatever happens... it'll be okay. 685 00:34:19,958 --> 00:34:21,860 Now you sound like Malcolm. 686 00:34:21,960 --> 00:34:23,828 I sound like a man I don't really know. 687 00:34:23,929 --> 00:34:26,231 But you will. 688 00:34:26,331 --> 00:34:28,099 And this family of his, they-- 689 00:34:28,199 --> 00:34:29,968 Your family. 690 00:34:30,068 --> 00:34:32,037 They have a lot to deal with. 691 00:34:32,137 --> 00:34:33,939 -So do you. -Mom. 692 00:34:34,039 --> 00:34:35,707 I am not one of them. 693 00:34:35,807 --> 00:34:38,476 And...and maybe it's better that way. 694 00:34:41,780 --> 00:34:44,716 Give yourself time to work through this. 695 00:34:44,816 --> 00:34:48,420 As I imagine they will do the same. 696 00:34:51,923 --> 00:34:54,459 Neither of the kids? 697 00:34:56,428 --> 00:34:58,697 No, I mean, that--yeah. It's okay. We'll just-- 698 00:34:58,797 --> 00:35:01,166 We'll move on to the next option. 699 00:35:01,266 --> 00:35:05,370 Yeah. I'm actually-- I'm here with Devon and Nate, 700 00:35:05,470 --> 00:35:07,472 and it would be a lot easier... 701 00:35:09,441 --> 00:35:11,042 Yeah. 702 00:35:11,142 --> 00:35:13,311 I love you. 703 00:35:20,485 --> 00:35:22,253 You okay? 704 00:35:25,790 --> 00:35:27,492 Hey. 705 00:35:28,593 --> 00:35:31,396 It's okay. 706 00:35:50,015 --> 00:35:52,617 Captioned by Los Angeles Distribution and Broadcasting, Inc. 707 00:35:52,717 --> 00:35:55,620 Captioning provided by Bell Dramatic Serial Company, 708 00:35:55,720 --> 00:35:58,623 Sony Pictures Television and CBS, Inc. 709 00:35:58,723 --> 00:36:01,760 Join us again for "The Young and the Restless."