1
00:00:12,025 --> 00:00:13,905
- Once upon a future time,

2
00:00:13,906 --> 00:00:16,158
in the lush little Land of Plenty,

3
00:00:16,159 --> 00:00:18,898
in the enviable state of Affluence,

4
00:00:18,899 --> 00:00:22,024
bordering on Decadence to the north,

5
00:00:22,025 --> 00:00:25,238
and the state before to the south,

6
00:00:25,239 --> 00:00:26,896
there nestled, deep
within the Erogenous Zone,

7
00:00:26,897 --> 00:00:30,574
the peaceful City of
Leisure, resting snugly

8
00:00:30,575 --> 00:00:33,379
on the western shore of the Idle Sea.

9
00:00:33,380 --> 00:00:36,076
In this lazy, but lovely town,

10
00:00:36,077 --> 00:00:40,048
the people of Leisure labored, and
lived, and laughed, and loved.

11
00:00:40,049 --> 00:00:41,365
And loved some more.

12
00:00:41,366 --> 00:00:43,104
Though their love had
nothing to do with the

13
00:00:43,105 --> 00:00:45,602
archaic notion of romantic love,

14
00:00:45,603 --> 00:00:48,548
which was the subject of
many a cautionary tale,

15
00:00:48,549 --> 00:00:50,807
told by the wary citizens.

16
00:00:50,901 --> 00:00:53,070
On the sun-drenched plaza, empty,

17
00:00:53,165 --> 00:00:55,587
because it was so early in the morning,

18
00:00:55,694 --> 00:00:59,489
sat Elvira, ready to face a new day.

19
00:00:59,655 --> 00:01:03,515
Elvira, as pretty as she was practical.

20
00:01:03,683 --> 00:01:06,519
As persevering as she was punctual.

21
00:01:06,644 --> 00:01:10,918
She and her husband, Jack,
typical people of Leisure,

22
00:01:11,104 --> 00:01:14,198
had a busy social life, which, happily,

23
00:01:14,334 --> 00:01:18,416
never strained their
successful and stable marriage.

24
00:01:18,593 --> 00:01:20,251
But, when they were able to savor those

25
00:01:20,324 --> 00:01:22,939
precious moments alone, they really

26
00:01:23,054 --> 00:01:25,924
savored those precious moments alone.

27
00:01:34,036 --> 00:01:38,088
Well, anyway, Elvira was
up very early that morning

28
00:01:38,266 --> 00:01:41,868
because she had a plan.

29
00:01:43,555 --> 00:01:46,394
An integral part of her
well-conceived strategy,

30
00:01:46,518 --> 00:01:51,304
was to get up early to
begin Operation Music Box.

31
00:01:53,541 --> 00:01:56,157
Meanwhile, on the other
side of the village,

32
00:01:56,271 --> 00:01:59,364
lived another couple,
Betsy and Eddie,

33
00:01:59,499 --> 00:02:02,370
who, at that very moment,
were slowly waking

34
00:02:02,495 --> 00:02:06,290
from the blissful warmth
of a night sweetly spent,

35
00:02:06,454 --> 00:02:09,103
cuddled in each other's arms.

36
00:02:29,921 --> 00:02:31,802
- I better get going.

37
00:02:34,645 --> 00:02:36,114
- Oh.

38
00:02:36,911 --> 00:02:39,271
Well, I guess I'll see if Elvira's up.

39
00:02:40,872 --> 00:02:42,338
- In point of fact,

40
00:02:42,402 --> 00:02:45,241
everyone was up early that morning.

41
00:02:57,796 --> 00:03:01,051
SCORE

42
00:05:07,520 --> 00:05:09,688
- Good morning, my love.

43
00:05:09,783 --> 00:05:10,962
- Well, well, well.

44
00:05:11,015 --> 00:05:12,928
Didn't we set out early,this morning?

45
00:05:13,012 --> 00:05:14,671
And don't we look enticing?

46
00:05:14,744 --> 00:05:15,922
- Why, thank you.

47
00:05:15,974 --> 00:05:18,364
- Except, isn't it early
for false eyelashes?

48
00:05:18,469 --> 00:05:20,160
- I'm expecting company.

49
00:05:20,233 --> 00:05:22,880
- Betsy.

50
00:05:22,997 --> 00:05:23,953
- I should have known.

51
00:05:23,995 --> 00:05:25,908
The gracious hostess outfit.

52
00:05:25,992 --> 00:05:28,384
- We played your games
last night, my love.

53
00:05:28,489 --> 00:05:30,593
- Are we playing Loretta
Young this morning?

54
00:05:30,686 --> 00:05:32,375
- I'll play mine today.

55
00:05:32,449 --> 00:05:34,618
- Come on, Elvira.

56
00:05:34,713 --> 00:05:36,594
It was a nice little party,last night.

57
00:05:36,677 --> 00:05:40,248
- I've spent better
evenings washing underwear.

58
00:05:40,905 --> 00:05:44,030
That's the third fiasco you've
gotten us into this month.

59
00:05:44,166 --> 00:05:46,079
I don't think we shall answer anymore ads.

60
00:05:46,164 --> 00:05:48,810
Or pick up anymore
couples on the Sea Europe,

61
00:05:48,926 --> 00:05:51,317
and all you can eat for
50 cents a day budget.

62
00:05:51,421 --> 00:05:52,855
- Don't be a sexual snob.

63
00:05:52,919 --> 00:05:54,354
We'll do better next time.

64
00:05:54,417 --> 00:05:57,033
Well, one undergrad newspaper
is no different from another.

65
00:05:58,644 --> 00:06:01,036
Or one budget tourist.

66
00:06:02,140 --> 00:06:04,532
People one meets are all so tacky.

67
00:06:04,636 --> 00:06:08,431
Well, you've got to admit, at least
they were interesting physically.

68
00:06:08,597 --> 00:06:10,287
- Oh, every time I turned over,

69
00:06:10,361 --> 00:06:13,231
there was another appendectomy scar.

70
00:06:13,357 --> 00:06:15,972
- You are a sexual snob.

71
00:06:16,087 --> 00:06:18,509
- Truth is, an ad makes it too easy.

72
00:06:18,615 --> 00:06:20,018
No mystery.

73
00:06:20,080 --> 00:06:21,322
No challenge.

74
00:06:21,377 --> 00:06:23,961
- Getting there is half the fun?

75
00:06:24,074 --> 00:06:25,763
- More than that.

76
00:06:25,838 --> 00:06:27,751
A good deal more.

77
00:06:27,835 --> 00:06:29,493
- You miss the chase, don't you?

78
00:06:29,566 --> 00:06:30,744
- Don't you?

79
00:06:30,796 --> 00:06:32,263
- I'm lazier than you.

80
00:06:32,328 --> 00:06:35,676
Not as tenacious, not as patient.

81
00:06:35,823 --> 00:06:37,736
- The spider and the gadfly.

82
00:06:37,820 --> 00:06:39,701
- The perfect marriage.

83
00:06:42,048 --> 00:06:43,705
- You're late.

84
00:06:46,041 --> 00:06:48,687
- Hey, just give me ten minutes.

85
00:06:48,803 --> 00:06:51,673
Speaking of your tenacity,
your six months are nearly up.

86
00:06:51,799 --> 00:06:52,946
You're running out of time.

87
00:06:52,997 --> 00:06:53,953
- With Besty?

88
00:06:53,995 --> 00:06:54,951
- With Betsy.

89
00:06:54,994 --> 00:06:56,652
Unless something new
has caught your fancy.

90
00:06:56,725 --> 00:07:00,105
You do play it down to the wire.

91
00:07:00,985 --> 00:07:02,675
- That's why I win.

92
00:07:02,750 --> 00:07:03,706
- Not always.

93
00:07:03,749 --> 00:07:04,671
- Oh?

94
00:07:04,712 --> 00:07:07,583
And what is the score, Jack?

95
00:07:08,475 --> 00:07:10,865
I thought she and her husband
were coming to dinner tonight.

96
00:07:10,970 --> 00:07:12,373
- That is correct.

97
00:07:12,435 --> 00:07:13,870
- What are they
doing in this place?

98
00:07:13,934 --> 00:07:15,400
What does the husband do?

99
00:07:15,464 --> 00:07:16,642
- Scientist of some kind.

100
00:07:16,695 --> 00:07:18,895
He swims around, looking
for water pollution.

101
00:07:18,991 --> 00:07:19,724
- Swims?

102
00:07:19,757 --> 00:07:21,127
- I told you.

103
00:07:21,188 --> 00:07:22,400
- You still think they'll come?

104
00:07:22,454 --> 00:07:23,857
- Why shouldn't they?

105
00:07:23,919 --> 00:07:25,608
- When did you see her last?

106
00:07:25,682 --> 00:07:27,595
- A week.

107
00:07:27,679 --> 00:07:29,591
- Nearly two.

108
00:07:29,909 --> 00:07:31,566
- Is she avoiding you?

109
00:07:31,639 --> 00:07:33,105
I think she senses that something

110
00:07:33,170 --> 00:07:34,605
- Of course, she does.

111
00:07:34,668 --> 00:07:37,283
But she doesn't know what she senses.

112
00:07:37,398 --> 00:07:40,268
- Does she still call you every morning?

113
00:07:40,394 --> 00:07:42,561
- I fascinate her.

114
00:07:42,656 --> 00:07:47,442
She can't grab hold, but she can't let go.

115
00:07:48,881 --> 00:07:50,794
- Using a music box today?

116
00:07:50,878 --> 00:07:53,716
Of course.
She's incredibly sentimental.

117
00:07:53,841 --> 00:07:55,561
- What is it, this time?

118
00:07:55,636 --> 00:07:57,549
Family heirloom, or wedding present?

119
00:07:57,634 --> 00:08:00,473
- No, her mother had one.

120
00:08:00,596 --> 00:08:02,256
How convenient.
She hasn't phoned yet?

121
00:08:02,329 --> 00:08:06,855
- No, today she'll be by.

122
00:08:14,311 --> 00:08:15,522
Oh, when you get to the location,

123
00:08:15,576 --> 00:08:18,668
would you call the telephone company,
report the phone out of order?

124
00:08:18,803 --> 00:08:20,014
- Is it really?

125
00:08:20,068 --> 00:08:21,215
Or do you just want company?

126
00:08:21,266 --> 00:08:24,136
- Oh, it is out of order, I assure you.

127
00:08:24,262 --> 00:08:25,699
I saw to that.

128
00:08:25,762 --> 00:08:28,439
- Hell of a lot of trouble,
for one little powderpuff.

129
00:08:28,557 --> 00:08:30,181
- You bastard.

130
00:08:30,252 --> 00:08:31,944
- All right, I'll report it first thing.

131
00:08:32,018 --> 00:08:33,676
And, if I get a chance, I'll call later,

132
00:08:33,749 --> 00:08:34,928
and see how things are going.

133
00:08:34,980 --> 00:08:36,671
- If I don't answer, you'll know.

134
00:08:36,746 --> 00:08:38,914
- Mm, that's my girl.

135
00:08:49,958 --> 00:08:53,081
- And Jack was
off to earn some daily bread,

136
00:08:53,218 --> 00:08:56,088
and to report a telephone out of order.

137
00:08:56,213 --> 00:08:59,787
He had a pretty good idea of
what might happen that morning,

138
00:08:59,944 --> 00:09:04,057
and even what might happen
that entire weekend.

139
00:09:05,668 --> 00:09:07,132
- Elvira.

140
00:09:07,197 --> 00:09:08,857
- Betsy, I was hoping you'd...

141
00:09:08,930 --> 00:09:10,139
Eddie, what are you...

142
00:09:10,193 --> 00:09:11,630
Why aren't you at work?

143
00:09:11,693 --> 00:09:12,871
- Well, I should be.

144
00:09:12,923 --> 00:09:13,848
- Is anything wrong?

145
00:09:13,889 --> 00:09:14,877
- No, nothing.

146
00:09:14,921 --> 00:09:16,578
See, everything's all right.

147
00:09:16,652 --> 00:09:17,863
- OK.

148
00:09:17,916 --> 00:09:18,393
- What?

149
00:09:18,415 --> 00:09:21,060
Well, when I couldn't reach you
on the phone, I got worried.

150
00:09:21,176 --> 00:09:23,315
- She'd been sure you'd
been murdered and raped.

151
00:09:23,409 --> 00:09:24,619
- Murdered, maybe.

152
00:09:24,673 --> 00:09:25,375
- What?

153
00:09:25,406 --> 00:09:26,137
- Nothing.

154
00:09:26,170 --> 00:09:26,841
- Can I go now?

155
00:09:26,871 --> 00:09:28,080
I'm really behind, as it is.

156
00:09:28,134 --> 00:09:29,089
- Of course.

157
00:09:29,131 --> 00:09:30,053
- Bye bye.

158
00:09:30,094 --> 00:09:32,009
- Eddie.

159
00:09:34,625 --> 00:09:36,857
- Bye bye, honey.

160
00:09:36,954 --> 00:09:38,070
- Bye bye, I'll miss you.

161
00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:40,511
- Is the phone really out of order?
- Yes.

162
00:09:40,616 --> 00:09:41,796
- Why, so it is.

163
00:09:41,848 --> 00:09:43,811
- I called to report
it, is that all right?

164
00:09:43,812 --> 00:09:46,491
- It must have happened
at the party, last night.

165
00:09:46,608 --> 00:09:50,334
Well, it really wasn't a party,
or you and Eddie would have been invited.

166
00:09:50,335 --> 00:09:52,471
- Oh, we couldn't have come, anyway.

167
00:09:52,565 --> 00:09:53,521
- Bowling?

168
00:09:53,564 --> 00:09:54,996
- Every Thursday.

169
00:09:55,059 --> 00:09:57,790
- The fascination of bowling
has always escaped me.

170
00:09:57,791 --> 00:09:59,481
- Me, too.

171
00:10:00,052 --> 00:10:02,191
- Let's go shopping.

172
00:10:05,013 --> 00:10:06,705
- Did you have a nice evening,Elvira?

173
00:10:06,779 --> 00:10:10,382
- No, I'd tell you all
about it, only you'd blush.

174
00:10:10,540 --> 00:10:12,677
- That's all a good
Catholic girl ever does.

175
00:10:12,771 --> 00:10:14,491
- So, while
the ladies did errands,

176
00:10:14,567 --> 00:10:18,107
the husbands were busily
occupied with their chores.

177
00:10:18,262 --> 00:10:21,578
Eddie, an ecologist, tried
to keep the waters clean

178
00:10:21,723 --> 00:10:23,922
and his test tubes in order.

179
00:10:27,979 --> 00:10:31,551
Jack, a photographer, shot
outdoor sports for profit.

180
00:10:31,708 --> 00:10:33,621
and indoor sports for fun.

181
00:10:33,705 --> 00:10:36,321
Also, living in the village
of Leisure, was Mike,

182
00:10:36,436 --> 00:10:40,039
the big, bad, wolf, on his
way to the house in the woods,

183
00:10:40,196 --> 00:10:43,065
where Elvira was
proceeding with phase two,

184
00:10:43,191 --> 00:10:45,837
of Operation Music Box.

185
00:10:45,952 --> 00:10:47,866
- The other day, Jack decided he

186
00:10:47,950 --> 00:10:50,087
wanted to answer one of those ads.

187
00:10:50,181 --> 00:10:51,838
You know.

188
00:10:51,910 --> 00:10:53,601
In here.

189
00:10:53,675 --> 00:10:56,290
In the back, the personals.

190
00:10:56,405 --> 00:10:58,796
I think it's page 31.

191
00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:02,112
The one that's circled.

192
00:11:02,196 --> 00:11:03,631
- Oh.

193
00:11:03,893 --> 00:11:08,741
"Swinging couple, late 20's,
traveling in Europe in July,

194
00:11:08,952 --> 00:11:13,640
"bored with, bored with
middle-class morality,

195
00:11:14,379 --> 00:11:17,726
"wants to widen horizons with
similarly inclined couples,

196
00:11:17,871 --> 00:11:21,699
"to 35, especially
interested in camera bugs,

197
00:11:21,865 --> 00:11:24,513
"and model types, all replies answered,

198
00:11:24,630 --> 00:11:27,022
"send photos."

199
00:11:28,591 --> 00:11:30,981
So, you did it, huh?

200
00:11:32,585 --> 00:11:37,591
Um, what does Jack say is
important in an erotic photo?

201
00:11:38,077 --> 00:11:40,914
- F22.

202
00:11:41,802 --> 00:11:44,706
Here's the evidence.

203
00:11:49,294 --> 00:11:51,207
It's upside down.

204
00:11:51,291 --> 00:11:53,713
- Well, um, anyway, it doesn't

205
00:11:53,818 --> 00:11:55,190
make any difference to me.

206
00:11:55,251 --> 00:11:56,685
Of course, I wouldn't do it.

207
00:11:56,748 --> 00:11:58,215
I really couldn't.

208
00:11:58,280 --> 00:11:59,714
I mean, I might think about doing it,

209
00:11:59,777 --> 00:12:00,956
but I couldn't do it.

210
00:12:01,009 --> 00:12:02,731
- Well, everyone fantasizes.

211
00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:03,953
- Yes, but whenever I do,

212
00:12:04,004 --> 00:12:06,427
I never see myself doing anything.

213
00:12:06,534 --> 00:12:07,681
- You must experience much

214
00:12:07,732 --> 00:12:09,390
less guilt than most people.

215
00:12:09,463 --> 00:12:10,705
- Hey, don't laugh at me.

216
00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:12,197
I told you, when you're taught

217
00:12:12,260 --> 00:12:14,618
by the nuns, you never forget.

218
00:12:15,954 --> 00:12:19,780
- I always wanted a Polaroid.
- Shall I show you how to operate it?

219
00:12:19,947 --> 00:12:21,860
Let's go upstairs.

220
00:12:22,943 --> 00:12:27,027
- I just love your bedroom,
it's so, so lived-in.

221
00:12:27,669 --> 00:12:28,912
Oh, I'm sorry, I--

222
00:12:28,967 --> 00:12:30,880
- Here we go.

223
00:12:31,163 --> 00:12:33,842
First, you push that down.

224
00:12:33,960 --> 00:12:38,681
Now, you set the focus here.

225
00:12:40,650 --> 00:12:45,721
Now, all you have to
do is look through here

226
00:12:46,142 --> 00:12:50,192
and press that little red button.

227
00:12:50,585 --> 00:12:53,057
- What shall I shoot?

228
00:13:00,687 --> 00:13:02,249
- Shoot this.

229
00:13:07,309 --> 00:13:09,000
- Ready?

230
00:13:09,839 --> 00:13:11,976
Oh, what's this?

231
00:13:13,602 --> 00:13:16,440
"Amyl nitrate."

232
00:13:16,564 --> 00:13:17,997
What's it for?

233
00:13:18,060 --> 00:13:20,229
- "Angina pectoris."

234
00:13:20,325 --> 00:13:21,983
Do you have a heart condition?

235
00:13:22,056 --> 00:13:23,234
- A "heart condition."

236
00:13:23,286 --> 00:13:24,752
- I don't understand.

237
00:13:24,817 --> 00:13:27,657
- Well, sometimes you can make
an evening more interesting.

238
00:13:27,780 --> 00:13:29,246
- Oh, drugs?

239
00:13:29,311 --> 00:13:32,882
- Say "pharmaceuticals,"
it's more gentile.

240
00:13:33,038 --> 00:13:36,675
Now, weren't you going to take my picture?

241
00:13:40,261 --> 00:13:42,653
- Um...

242
00:13:42,757 --> 00:13:44,893
Don't you want to cover up?

243
00:13:45,220 --> 00:13:47,613
You're, you're exposed.

244
00:13:47,717 --> 00:13:51,034
- Well, leave my face out of the picture.

245
00:14:04,159 --> 00:14:06,295
- Oh, Jesus Christ, who's that?

246
00:14:09,885 --> 00:14:12,052
- Telephone company.

247
00:14:12,147 --> 00:14:13,583
- I wasn't expecting you so soon.

248
00:14:13,646 --> 00:14:16,292
This is the fastest service we've
gotten, since we've been here.

249
00:14:16,408 --> 00:14:18,288
- Well, we aren't very busy, today.

250
00:14:18,371 --> 00:14:20,061
One of those saint's days.

251
00:14:21,899 --> 00:14:25,695
Gee, what have we got here?

252
00:14:25,861 --> 00:14:28,029
- We had a little party last night.

253
00:14:28,124 --> 00:14:30,259
We were all drinking rather heavily.

254
00:14:30,353 --> 00:14:33,256
Some of us have stumbled over the cord.

255
00:14:34,048 --> 00:14:35,036
- Under the table?

256
00:14:35,080 --> 00:14:38,238
- What were they doing under the table?
- I can't imagine.

257
00:14:38,376 --> 00:14:40,480
Can you?

258
00:14:40,573 --> 00:14:42,740
- Must have been some party.

259
00:14:42,835 --> 00:14:44,270
- Average.

260
00:14:44,333 --> 00:14:45,990
- What do you do at a good one?

261
00:14:46,063 --> 00:14:47,499
Knock down a wall?

262
00:14:47,563 --> 00:14:49,698
- Depends on the guest list.

263
00:14:51,556 --> 00:14:53,277
- I wish I'd been invited.

264
00:14:53,353 --> 00:14:56,159
- If I'd known you yesterday,
you would have been.

265
00:14:56,782 --> 00:15:01,566
Oh, you must excuse me, I
wasn't expecting anyone.

266
00:15:02,274 --> 00:15:03,709
- Yeah, it's all right.

267
00:15:03,772 --> 00:15:06,194
I tell you, in this line of work,you see

268
00:15:06,300 --> 00:15:08,947
people in all states,
you know what I mean?

269
00:15:09,263 --> 00:15:11,623
- Well, if you'll excuse me.

270
00:15:11,726 --> 00:15:14,596
My friend is here, we were just going over
some things upstairs.

271
00:15:14,722 --> 00:15:15,966
- Recipes?

272
00:15:16,021 --> 00:15:18,123
- Something like that.

273
00:15:19,016 --> 00:15:19,940
- OK, Mrs. Jackson.

274
00:15:19,981 --> 00:15:22,117
- "Mrs. Jackson"
is my mother-in-law.

275
00:15:22,211 --> 00:15:24,378
My name is "Elvira."

276
00:15:24,473 --> 00:15:26,132
- "Elvira."

277
00:15:26,205 --> 00:15:27,895
It's a very unusual name, you know.

278
00:15:27,970 --> 00:15:30,839
- Can I get you a cup
of coffee before I go?

279
00:15:30,964 --> 00:15:32,143
- Uh, no thanks.

280
00:15:32,196 --> 00:15:35,098
Maybe later.

281
00:15:35,225 --> 00:15:37,329
- Maybe.

282
00:15:48,139 --> 00:15:49,574
The telephone repair man.

283
00:15:49,637 --> 00:15:50,848
- Oh, already?

284
00:15:50,902 --> 00:15:52,590
- They're not very busy, today.

285
00:15:52,664 --> 00:15:54,577
One of those saint's days.

286
00:15:54,895 --> 00:15:57,254
He's really rather handsome,
in a rough sort of way.

287
00:15:57,358 --> 00:15:59,527
- Well, I was thinking,

288
00:15:59,622 --> 00:16:03,736
with all of you in bed, how do you know

289
00:16:03,916 --> 00:16:05,765
- Who's who?

290
00:16:05,846 --> 00:16:08,268
- Well, yeah.

291
00:16:08,374 --> 00:16:09,841
- You don't.

292
00:16:09,906 --> 00:16:11,532
First, you don't know.

293
00:16:11,604 --> 00:16:13,773
Then, you can't tell.

294
00:16:13,868 --> 00:16:15,781
Then, you don't care.

295
00:16:15,865 --> 00:16:19,243
When I first met Jack, it took me

296
00:16:19,391 --> 00:16:21,944
a long time to get used to it.

297
00:16:22,055 --> 00:16:23,968
His ways.

298
00:16:24,051 --> 00:16:26,955
Oh, I'd heard all about
him, and his adventures.

299
00:16:27,082 --> 00:16:30,653
Then I found out that
everything I'd heard was true.

300
00:16:30,809 --> 00:16:33,424
And one day, just before
I married him, I said--

301
00:16:33,538 --> 00:16:37,397
- Jack, I know you'd
just as soon climb aboard

302
00:16:37,566 --> 00:16:40,659
a man as a woman, wouldn't you?

303
00:16:42,525 --> 00:16:45,362
- Elvira, I'd climb aboard a porcupine,

304
00:16:45,486 --> 00:16:47,687
if it struck my fancy.

305
00:16:47,784 --> 00:16:50,654
- Well, it didn't
make much sense to me, then.

306
00:16:50,779 --> 00:16:54,062
But, over the years,
it's begun to rub off.

307
00:16:54,206 --> 00:16:56,151
- Porcupine, huh?

308
00:16:56,237 --> 00:16:57,416
- Well, I doubt that you'll

309
00:16:57,468 --> 00:17:00,338
ever have to resort to a porcupine.

310
00:17:00,464 --> 00:17:04,771
No. not someone as lovely as you.

311
00:17:07,220 --> 00:17:09,837
How about that cup of coffee, now?

312
00:17:09,952 --> 00:17:13,043
Well, you know, I don't
even know your name.

313
00:17:13,178 --> 00:17:14,678
- Mike, Mike Nixon.

314
00:17:14,744 --> 00:17:15,412
- Hello.

315
00:17:15,443 --> 00:17:16,398
- No relation.

316
00:17:17,939 --> 00:17:18,671
You a photographer?

317
00:17:18,704 --> 00:17:19,948
- Oh, no, it's Elvira's.

318
00:17:20,002 --> 00:17:21,372
She was showing me.

319
00:17:21,433 --> 00:17:22,869
- Yeah, my kid brother has one of these,

320
00:17:22,932 --> 00:17:25,066
and you should see some of
the pictures he takes with it.

321
00:17:26,160 --> 00:17:27,595
Well, sorry, ladies.

322
00:17:27,658 --> 00:17:30,559
- Mike, we're all adults.

323
00:17:30,686 --> 00:17:33,524
My husband calls it, "God's
gift to pornography."

324
00:17:33,649 --> 00:17:34,670
- That's what I meant.

325
00:17:34,715 --> 00:17:36,307
- That's what I thought you meant.

326
00:17:36,377 --> 00:17:38,769
- No offense.

327
00:17:38,874 --> 00:17:40,820
Well, if you'll excuse me...

328
00:17:40,906 --> 00:17:42,338
- Um, I'll help you.

329
00:17:42,401 --> 00:17:44,283
- I can handle it, myself.

330
00:17:44,366 --> 00:17:46,279
Show Mike the terrace.

331
00:17:46,363 --> 00:17:48,531
- How did you happen to get
into this line of business?

332
00:17:48,626 --> 00:17:51,497
- Well, I always say, when
they ask me, you know,

333
00:17:51,623 --> 00:17:53,758
I always tell 'em, "I was
reading this book, one time,

334
00:17:53,852 --> 00:17:55,765
"from England, about
this telephone repairman,

335
00:17:55,849 --> 00:17:57,283
"and all his adventures."

336
00:17:57,347 --> 00:17:59,739
You know, his "adventures"?

337
00:17:59,844 --> 00:18:01,534
And everyone always laughs.

338
00:18:01,608 --> 00:18:03,265
But that wasn't the reason.

339
00:18:03,338 --> 00:18:08,121
I mean, I never had no adventures.

340
00:18:09,796 --> 00:18:11,452
- What was the name of the book?

341
00:18:11,525 --> 00:18:14,876
- I don't know, it was a long time ago.

342
00:18:15,022 --> 00:18:17,953
As a matter of fact, I'm not so sure
there ever was such a book.

343
00:18:18,081 --> 00:18:20,665
It was like one of those things you hear
about over the years, you know?

344
00:18:20,778 --> 00:18:22,915
- I think I read the same book.

345
00:18:23,009 --> 00:18:24,443
- You did, huh?

346
00:18:24,507 --> 00:18:28,110
- All about the adventures
of this young stud.

347
00:18:28,267 --> 00:18:31,105
This young, blonde stud.

348
00:18:31,530 --> 00:18:32,453
- Blonde?

349
00:18:32,494 --> 00:18:35,108
He doesn't have to be blonde.

350
00:18:35,757 --> 00:18:38,851
- Young, muscular, stud.

351
00:18:38,986 --> 00:18:40,675
And how he went from house to house,

352
00:18:40,749 --> 00:18:42,662
being nice to love-starved housewives.

353
00:18:42,746 --> 00:18:43,926
- That's the one.

354
00:18:43,979 --> 00:18:46,594
- Is it like that in real life?

355
00:18:46,708 --> 00:18:49,098
- It happens.

356
00:18:49,203 --> 00:18:52,072
- What would you do,
if it happened to you?

357
00:18:52,198 --> 00:18:54,591
- I think I could handle it.

358
00:18:54,696 --> 00:18:56,384
I'm sure I could.

359
00:18:56,692 --> 00:18:59,115
If I was interested.

360
00:19:02,918 --> 00:19:06,041
- Do you still want that cup of coffee?

361
00:19:06,177 --> 00:19:07,837
- Why not?

362
00:19:07,910 --> 00:19:09,824
- Betsy.

363
00:19:11,672 --> 00:19:13,073
- Oh!

364
00:19:13,135 --> 00:19:15,335
- Hot!

365
00:19:15,432 --> 00:19:17,058
- Oh, I'm sorry!

366
00:19:17,130 --> 00:19:21,212
I'll get something to put on it.

367
00:19:24,386 --> 00:19:27,735
- You two always make such
a production out of it?

368
00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:31,420
- I'm, I'm just a visitor here, myself.

369
00:19:32,840 --> 00:19:35,964
- This should
take the sting out of it.

370
00:19:46,819 --> 00:19:49,434
I hope you don't think
that was intentional.

371
00:19:49,549 --> 00:19:50,983
- That wasn't what I was thinking.
I was thinking,

372
00:19:51,046 --> 00:19:52,990
"What would have happened,

373
00:19:53,076 --> 00:19:55,661
"if the coffee spilled all over you?"

374
00:19:56,305 --> 00:19:57,962
Huh?

375
00:22:21,491 --> 00:22:23,989
- Why don't you take off
your hat, and stay awhile?

376
00:23:57,215 --> 00:24:01,011
- Elvira.

377
00:24:02,673 --> 00:24:04,797
I think I'll be going, now.

378
00:24:12,392 --> 00:24:14,529
Elvira.

379
00:24:22,612 --> 00:24:24,779
Elvira.

380
00:24:37,322 --> 00:24:38,309
- Want a drink?

381
00:24:38,353 --> 00:24:39,534
- No, thanks.

382
00:24:39,587 --> 00:24:42,200
Next time, got a dinner date, at home.

383
00:24:54,062 --> 00:24:55,018
- When is Betsy coming?

384
00:24:55,061 --> 00:24:56,975
- She'll be along.

385
00:24:57,058 --> 00:25:00,152
- Let me check your coat, Eddie.
And your jacket.

386
00:25:00,555 --> 00:25:02,212
- Sit down.
- What are you drinking?

387
00:25:02,285 --> 00:25:04,197
- Um, milk,
first, if you've got any.

388
00:25:04,281 --> 00:25:06,641
I can nurse the ulcer before
I nurse anything else.

389
00:25:06,745 --> 00:25:08,211
- You're too
young to have an ulcer.

390
00:25:08,275 --> 00:25:09,677
- You look all of 17.

391
00:25:09,739 --> 00:25:10,936
- 22.

392
00:25:10,989 --> 00:25:12,662
I still get asked for my I.D.

393
00:25:12,736 --> 00:25:14,425
- Not necessary, here.

394
00:25:14,500 --> 00:25:15,935
What are you gonna have
for a second course?

395
00:25:15,997 --> 00:25:17,464
- Anything. Scotch?

396
00:25:17,529 --> 00:25:18,963
- Scotch, coming right up.

397
00:25:19,025 --> 00:25:21,386
- How long have you had an ulcer?
- Since I was 15.

398
00:25:21,490 --> 00:25:22,701
- Here we go.

399
00:25:22,754 --> 00:25:24,699
- Thank you.

400
00:25:27,713 --> 00:25:29,402
- Junk mail.

401
00:25:29,476 --> 00:25:30,976
- Was Betsy here, all afternoon?

402
00:25:31,043 --> 00:25:33,114
- No, we ended up at your
place, this afternoon.

403
00:25:33,205 --> 00:25:35,597
She called me a couple of times.
Do you know what it was?

404
00:25:35,702 --> 00:25:37,361
- I haven't got the vaguest notion.

405
00:25:37,434 --> 00:25:40,813
- I better check, can I use your
- Drink your milk, first.

406
00:25:43,923 --> 00:25:44,911
- Oh, that's enough.

407
00:25:44,956 --> 00:25:46,835
- She'll probably be
here, before you finish this.

408
00:25:46,918 --> 00:25:49,788
- You stay here, I'll phone.

409
00:25:56,903 --> 00:25:58,849
- How do you think we'll
do in the Olympics?

410
00:25:58,935 --> 00:25:59,891
- Oh, I don't know.

411
00:25:59,934 --> 00:26:01,080
- Dunno, huh?

412
00:26:01,131 --> 00:26:02,087
- No.

413
00:26:02,129 --> 00:26:04,519
- Thank God, not gonna
be one of those evenings.

414
00:26:09,651 --> 00:26:12,936
- Betsy. Elvira.
- You and Betsy been married long?

415
00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:15,024
- About a year, a little less.

416
00:26:15,110 --> 00:26:16,990
- Elvira and I have been
married a lot longer.

417
00:26:17,072 --> 00:26:19,496
- That's nonsense, Betsy.

418
00:26:19,603 --> 00:26:21,963
You think we do that sort
of thing all the time?

419
00:26:22,066 --> 00:26:23,309
- What brings you here, anyway?

420
00:26:23,364 --> 00:26:24,799
- Ecology grant.

421
00:26:24,863 --> 00:26:26,488
We're studying comparative
pollution of the seas,

422
00:26:26,560 --> 00:26:28,472
between here and the States.

423
00:26:28,556 --> 00:26:29,512
- Sounds fascinating.

424
00:26:29,554 --> 00:26:31,755
- Betsy wants to talk to you.

425
00:26:32,817 --> 00:26:34,028
- Hi.

426
00:26:34,082 --> 00:26:35,741
Where are you?

427
00:26:35,814 --> 00:26:37,949
But I thought...

428
00:26:38,043 --> 00:26:40,433
No, there's no one here
but Jack, Elvira, and me.

429
00:26:40,538 --> 00:26:43,409
Look, this was your idea.

430
00:26:43,534 --> 00:26:44,968
All right, hold on.

431
00:26:45,032 --> 00:26:46,436
She's got a headache.

432
00:26:46,498 --> 00:26:48,251
- Tell her to take a couple of aspirin.

433
00:26:48,328 --> 00:26:50,719
Well, look, they've already
got dinner on. I can't do that.

434
00:26:50,824 --> 00:26:51,748
- Let me speak to her.

435
00:26:51,789 --> 00:26:53,702
Betsy? Jack here.

436
00:26:53,786 --> 00:26:55,412
What's the matter?

437
00:26:55,484 --> 00:26:56,439
Oh, too bad.

438
00:26:56,482 --> 00:26:59,128
Look, you don't mind if Eddie
stays on for dinner, do you?

439
00:26:59,244 --> 00:27:01,882
If you're feeling better, later,
you can join us for dessert.

440
00:27:03,739 --> 00:27:04,915
Oh, sorry.

441
00:27:04,967 --> 00:27:06,180
Did you want to talk to her?

442
00:27:06,234 --> 00:27:09,104
- No, that's all right.
- I'm sure she'll be along any minute.

443
00:27:09,230 --> 00:27:10,760
- Well, if you'll excuse me, I do have

444
00:27:10,761 --> 00:27:12,610
things to do in the kitchen.

445
00:27:12,692 --> 00:27:14,669
A woman's work, you know.

446
00:27:19,714 --> 00:27:21,116
- Say, that's a nice looking ring.

447
00:27:21,178 --> 00:27:22,135
- You like it?

448
00:27:22,178 --> 00:27:23,835
I wasn't sure I liked it.

449
00:27:23,907 --> 00:27:25,405
I thought it looked a little queer.

450
00:27:25,406 --> 00:27:27,574
- "Queer" strange, or "queer" faggoty?

451
00:27:27,669 --> 00:27:29,325
- "Queer" faggoty.

452
00:27:29,398 --> 00:27:30,834
But my boss wears one.

453
00:27:30,897 --> 00:27:32,587
He's got three kids.

454
00:27:34,160 --> 00:27:35,594
See what I mean?

455
00:27:35,657 --> 00:27:36,614
- Where'd you get yours?

456
00:27:36,657 --> 00:27:37,612
- Betsy gave it to me.

457
00:27:37,654 --> 00:27:38,643
- Birthday?

458
00:27:38,687 --> 00:27:40,055
- No, my birthday's in June.

459
00:27:40,116 --> 00:27:40,880
- June.

460
00:27:40,914 --> 00:27:41,585
Gemini?

461
00:27:41,615 --> 00:27:42,857
- Right, the twins.

462
00:27:42,912 --> 00:27:44,315
- So, you're a Gemini.

463
00:27:44,377 --> 00:27:45,428
- Is that bad?

464
00:27:45,475 --> 00:27:47,037
I don't know anything about that.

465
00:27:47,106 --> 00:27:49,754
- Well. Gemini
men are schizophrenic,

466
00:27:49,869 --> 00:27:52,260
split-personality, double life.

467
00:27:52,365 --> 00:27:53,800
- I take the fifth.

468
00:27:53,862 --> 00:27:55,521
- Take whatever you can get.

469
00:27:55,594 --> 00:27:56,550
- Yeah.

470
00:27:56,593 --> 00:27:57,835
- I'm a Scorpio, myself.

471
00:27:57,890 --> 00:27:59,037
- Oh, what does that make you?

472
00:27:59,088 --> 00:28:00,589
Paranoid?

473
00:28:00,655 --> 00:28:02,979
- Sex-fiend.

474
00:28:03,081 --> 00:28:05,698
- I think I need another ice cube.

475
00:28:05,813 --> 00:28:07,023
- Make yourself at home.

476
00:28:07,077 --> 00:28:09,245
Of course, that's an over-simplification.

477
00:28:09,340 --> 00:28:10,265
- What?

478
00:28:10,306 --> 00:28:12,920
Oh, the "sex fiend" thing, yeah.

479
00:28:13,035 --> 00:28:14,757
Hey, that's a nice picture of Elvira.

480
00:28:14,832 --> 00:28:15,979
- Yeah.

481
00:28:16,029 --> 00:28:17,825
- Look, I might as well
tell you. right off,

482
00:28:17,826 --> 00:28:20,187
I can't hold my liquor worth a damn.

483
00:28:20,291 --> 00:28:21,503
- What does it make you do?

484
00:28:21,557 --> 00:28:22,989
- What does it make me do?

485
00:28:23,052 --> 00:28:23,977
- Liquor.

486
00:28:24,018 --> 00:28:26,187
Does it make you feel
silly, or belligerent?

487
00:28:26,282 --> 00:28:27,939
Sleepy?

488
00:28:28,012 --> 00:28:28,712
Sexy?

489
00:28:28,744 --> 00:28:29,510
- Careless.

490
00:28:29,544 --> 00:28:31,169
Uh, care-free, I mean.

491
00:28:31,741 --> 00:28:33,208
- What does grass do to you?

492
00:28:33,273 --> 00:28:35,153
- Grass?

493
00:28:36,500 --> 00:28:38,637
One night I went bowling,
and one of the guys had some.

494
00:28:38,731 --> 00:28:39,943
- And...?

495
00:28:39,997 --> 00:28:41,429
- Nothing happened.

496
00:28:41,492 --> 00:28:42,929
- Never does, the first time.

497
00:28:42,992 --> 00:28:44,393
- Oh, I didn't hear you come in.

498
00:28:44,455 --> 00:28:46,145
- Eddie, you're blushing.

499
00:28:46,220 --> 00:28:48,133
Did I interrupt some man talk?

500
00:28:48,217 --> 00:28:51,087
- Oh, no, we were just
talking about turning on.

501
00:28:51,213 --> 00:28:55,039
- Oh, doesn't it take two or three times?

502
00:29:02,429 --> 00:29:04,373
- Well, surprise.

503
00:29:04,458 --> 00:29:06,371
- I'm sorry about this afternoon.

504
00:29:06,456 --> 00:29:08,082
- I'm glad you decided to come.

505
00:29:08,153 --> 00:29:10,289
- Am I still invited?

506
00:29:14,145 --> 00:29:17,014
- I'll see if we have enough chairs.

507
00:29:17,439 --> 00:29:19,799
- You've got quite a wife, there.
- I think so.

508
00:29:19,903 --> 00:29:22,630
- Elvira tells me she goes bowling
with you, that sort of thing.

509
00:29:22,631 --> 00:29:24,545
- Well, we try to do things together.

510
00:29:24,629 --> 00:29:26,829
- Was she there the night you turned on?
- Oh, no, she--

511
00:29:26,926 --> 00:29:28,583
- Did somebody say, "turn on"?

512
00:29:28,656 --> 00:29:31,016
We were just talking about the night
Eddie turned on.

513
00:29:31,120 --> 00:29:33,255
- Turned on?
- I was gonna tell you.

514
00:29:33,349 --> 00:29:35,774
- You turned on?
- Yeah, once, it was nothing.

515
00:29:35,880 --> 00:29:38,462
- You never told me.
- Christ, Eddie, I'm sorry.

516
00:29:38,575 --> 00:29:40,998
- When did you do that?
- One night at bowling.

517
00:29:41,105 --> 00:29:42,986
You know, that night, you
were having your peri...

518
00:29:43,068 --> 00:29:44,056
You weren't feeling well.

519
00:29:44,100 --> 00:29:46,268
- So, you turned on.
- Yes.

520
00:29:46,364 --> 00:29:49,425
- I'd like another.
- Coming up.

521
00:29:49,559 --> 00:29:51,950
- Look, Eddie, I didn't mean to
- Forget it.

522
00:29:52,055 --> 00:29:54,925
- Betsy, have I spoiled the evening?
- Of course not.

523
00:29:55,050 --> 00:29:56,771
I mean, I'm not a nun.

524
00:29:56,847 --> 00:29:58,282
It's just that I didn't know.

525
00:29:58,346 --> 00:30:00,707
- Have you ever smoked?
- I don't even smoke cigarettes.

526
00:30:00,810 --> 00:30:03,168
- Well, it's not the same thing.
- It was nothing.

527
00:30:03,271 --> 00:30:04,961
- Well, how many times?
- Once, I told you.

528
00:30:05,035 --> 00:30:06,246
- Well, I read, you have to
do it two or three times--

529
00:30:06,300 --> 00:30:07,479
- Drop it.
- No, you're--

530
00:30:07,531 --> 00:30:08,966
- Drop it!

531
00:30:10,495 --> 00:30:12,695
- We keep ours in the pepper mill.

532
00:30:12,791 --> 00:30:17,171
I'd better set the timer, or we'll
forget all about the veal and peppers.

533
00:30:18,983 --> 00:30:21,853
- Don't you ever play, anymore?
- Never.

534
00:30:21,854 --> 00:30:25,847
Well, that's sad, isn't it?
Isn't it, Eddie? Eddie?

535
00:30:25,848 --> 00:30:27,236
Did I ever tell you?
Elvira's a pianist.

536
00:30:27,236 --> 00:30:30,105
- Ex-pianist, if you please.
- Eddie?

537
00:30:30,106 --> 00:30:32,144
- I saw the photograph.
- Jack took it.

538
00:30:32,145 --> 00:30:34,492
- It was the first picture
I ever took of Elvira.

539
00:30:34,493 --> 00:30:35,448
Where was it taken?

540
00:30:35,491 --> 00:30:36,416
San Francisco.

541
00:30:36,417 --> 00:30:38,369
That was the summer I was
bumming around California.

542
00:30:38,370 --> 00:30:40,366
You know, I've always wanted to do that.

543
00:30:40,450 --> 00:30:42,587
Just me and my camera.

544
00:30:42,680 --> 00:30:43,413
'Til I met her.

545
00:30:43,446 --> 00:30:45,104
- And you gave it all up for him.

546
00:30:45,177 --> 00:30:48,302
I never wanted to be a
concert pianist that badly.

547
00:30:48,439 --> 00:30:50,576
Oh, I always wanted to play the piano.

548
00:30:50,669 --> 00:30:52,327
I took piano lessons for years.

549
00:30:52,400 --> 00:30:53,834
The only thing I can play now is

550
00:30:53,897 --> 00:30:56,064
"Heart and Soul" and "Chopsticks."

551
00:30:56,159 --> 00:30:59,285
But I only play the top part.

552
00:30:59,422 --> 00:31:00,378
- Of what?

553
00:31:00,421 --> 00:31:02,302
- "Heart and Soul" and "Chopsticks."

554
00:31:02,385 --> 00:31:05,030
- Then I'll play the bottom.
- Or what?

555
00:31:05,146 --> 00:31:09,645
- "Heart and Soul" and "Chopsticks."
- OK.

556
00:31:09,841 --> 00:31:12,520
- Can we play?
- Yes, but I'll need both hands.

557
00:31:12,637 --> 00:31:16,176
- Am I stoned, yet?
- I don't think so.

558
00:31:16,330 --> 00:31:18,531
- Then why don't we play
"Chopsticks," anyway.

559
00:31:19,627 --> 00:31:21,029
Hit it.

560
00:31:32,606 --> 00:31:34,298
- You know something, old buddy?

561
00:31:34,373 --> 00:31:35,997
That is a brilliant song.

562
00:31:36,069 --> 00:31:38,908
- Right, it's always
been one of my favorites.

563
00:31:39,032 --> 00:31:40,975
Right.

564
00:31:47,052 --> 00:31:48,934
I don't remember the words.

565
00:31:49,017 --> 00:31:51,662
An interesting picture, on
the cover of this magazine.

566
00:31:51,778 --> 00:31:53,435
Right, only it's a newspaper.

567
00:31:53,508 --> 00:31:55,454
Right. Only, it's interesting.

568
00:31:55,540 --> 00:31:57,453
That man looks like a cowboy.

569
00:31:57,537 --> 00:31:59,195
I always wanted to be a cowboy.

570
00:31:59,268 --> 00:32:02,424
I didn't. Because I'd rather
wear Levi's than dress pants.

571
00:32:02,562 --> 00:32:05,400
Do you like to wear Levi's, Jack?
I never wanted to be a cowboy.

572
00:32:05,524 --> 00:32:06,927
No, I did.

573
00:32:06,989 --> 00:32:08,934
I'm the one that wanted to be a sailor.

574
00:32:09,020 --> 00:32:10,168
- A sailor?

575
00:32:10,219 --> 00:32:13,407
I never wanted to be a sailor
in my whole life.

576
00:32:13,546 --> 00:32:15,426
So, I enlisted in the navy.

577
00:32:15,509 --> 00:32:18,346
I was going to go to Colorado one
summer, but I never got there.

578
00:32:18,471 --> 00:32:20,384
I had a trick knee, so
they wouldn't take me.

579
00:32:20,468 --> 00:32:23,562
I always wanted to be a model.

580
00:32:23,697 --> 00:32:26,376
I thought you wanted to play the piano.

581
00:32:26,494 --> 00:32:29,523
I wanted to be a model
who played the piano.

582
00:32:29,655 --> 00:32:30,611
Oh.

583
00:32:30,654 --> 00:32:32,407
I could have been, too.

584
00:32:32,484 --> 00:32:34,365
Except for my breasts.

585
00:32:34,448 --> 00:32:36,075
They're very small.

586
00:32:36,147 --> 00:32:37,837
I should have worn my boots tonight.

587
00:32:37,911 --> 00:32:40,332
But I like my breasts, anyway.

588
00:32:40,438 --> 00:32:42,065
Don't you, Eddie?

589
00:32:42,137 --> 00:32:44,304
You've got good breasts.

590
00:32:44,399 --> 00:32:45,580
Where was I?

591
00:32:45,633 --> 00:32:47,353
You know what I always wanted to be?

592
00:32:47,428 --> 00:32:48,800
- Oh, yes, it's Elvira's turn.

593
00:32:48,861 --> 00:32:50,072
Do tell.

594
00:32:50,126 --> 00:32:53,954
A girl on the cover
of the Police Gazette.

595
00:32:58,845 --> 00:33:01,715
What's in here?

596
00:33:03,107 --> 00:33:05,977
Just what you've always wanted.

597
00:33:06,868 --> 00:33:09,449
- Are we gonna play dress-up?

598
00:33:09,562 --> 00:33:10,519
This is silly.

599
00:33:10,562 --> 00:33:11,998
So is this.

600
00:33:12,060 --> 00:33:14,006
Hey, look, Betsy, now you can be
on the cover of the Police Gazette.

601
00:33:14,091 --> 00:33:15,973
Oh, that wasn't me, that was Elvira.

602
00:33:16,055 --> 00:33:17,968
But it's not a bad idea for you.

603
00:33:18,051 --> 00:33:19,484
What are you gonna dress up as?

604
00:33:19,547 --> 00:33:21,461
Something special.

605
00:33:21,545 --> 00:33:23,234
Here, hold this.

606
00:33:23,776 --> 00:33:26,421
Gee.

607
00:33:26,537 --> 00:33:28,194
That's just what I was saying.

608
00:33:28,267 --> 00:33:31,392
Betsy, I seem to be
having some difficulty.

609
00:33:31,529 --> 00:33:36,314
Elvira, I'll bet when I
wasn't looking, you got stoned.

610
00:33:36,523 --> 00:33:38,436
I'll bet I did, too.

611
00:33:38,520 --> 00:33:39,699
Am I stoned, yet?

612
00:33:39,751 --> 00:33:41,440
I don't think so.

613
00:33:41,515 --> 00:33:43,172
If you'll excuse me, I have
to take my clothes off, now.

614
00:33:43,245 --> 00:33:44,938
Hurry back.

615
00:33:45,509 --> 00:33:46,464
- Dress whites.

616
00:33:46,507 --> 00:33:48,165
- Hey, Jack's gonna be a sailor.

617
00:33:48,238 --> 00:33:49,962
Do I look like a cover girl, Betsy?

618
00:33:50,037 --> 00:33:51,919
- Oh, it's perfect.

619
00:33:52,001 --> 00:33:54,840
No one will every guess
you play the piano.

620
00:33:54,964 --> 00:33:55,887
- Is it straight?

621
00:33:55,928 --> 00:33:58,382
Join the navy, and see the world.

622
00:33:59,455 --> 00:34:00,635
What am I gonna wear?

623
00:34:00,687 --> 00:34:01,867
No tattoos, though.

624
00:34:01,920 --> 00:34:03,129
Now what are we gonna do about that?

625
00:34:03,182 --> 00:34:06,084
Well, I could draw one
on, if you want me to.

626
00:34:06,211 --> 00:34:07,390
Sure.

627
00:34:07,443 --> 00:34:08,623
- What do you want, old buddy?

628
00:34:08,675 --> 00:34:11,066
How about, an arrow,
with an arrow through it.

629
00:34:11,171 --> 00:34:13,562
Well, if that's what you want.

630
00:34:13,667 --> 00:34:15,101
That's what I want, old buddy.

631
00:34:15,164 --> 00:34:16,120
Here, let me see you do it.

632
00:34:16,163 --> 00:34:17,598
I have to have spiked heels.

633
00:34:17,661 --> 00:34:18,586
What size?

634
00:34:18,627 --> 00:34:19,582
You got my size?

635
00:34:19,625 --> 00:34:21,091
How come you got all sizes?

636
00:34:21,156 --> 00:34:23,805
Because, Jack's a
photographer, dumb-dumb.

637
00:34:23,921 --> 00:34:25,578
Didn't I ever tell you that?

638
00:34:25,651 --> 00:34:26,831
Not very good, old buddy.

639
00:34:26,883 --> 00:34:30,005
Best one I've ever had, old buddy.

640
00:34:30,677 --> 00:34:31,824
Look, Elvira.

641
00:34:31,875 --> 00:34:33,340
Stunning.

642
00:34:33,405 --> 00:34:35,285
- I'd call it a real masterpiece.

643
00:34:35,368 --> 00:34:37,538
Betsy, why don't you try this?

644
00:34:39,830 --> 00:34:42,028
- Should I do it, Eddie?

645
00:34:42,125 --> 00:34:43,303
- Betsy's turn.

646
00:34:43,355 --> 00:34:44,793
No, I can't.

647
00:34:57,069 --> 00:34:59,205
Oh, I don't know!

648
00:35:07,789 --> 00:35:08,713
I'll help.

649
00:35:08,754 --> 00:35:09,963
- I'll do it.

650
00:35:11,517 --> 00:35:14,642
After all, Eddie, she did it for me.

651
00:35:15,510 --> 00:35:17,646
Now, I can be your lady.

652
00:35:20,503 --> 00:35:24,105
Oh, an awful lot of
buttons on those pants.

653
00:35:24,263 --> 00:35:25,667
Yeah.

654
00:35:25,729 --> 00:35:26,970
Why don't I just wear nothing?

655
00:35:27,025 --> 00:35:28,652
- That would be vulgar.

656
00:35:28,724 --> 00:35:30,382
Here we go.

657
00:35:30,455 --> 00:35:32,623
Oh, now where did that come from?

658
00:35:32,718 --> 00:35:33,927
Heaven.

659
00:35:35,213 --> 00:35:36,394
- Are you laughing at me?

660
00:35:36,446 --> 00:35:37,910
- Of course not.

661
00:35:37,975 --> 00:35:39,379
Is he?

662
00:35:39,441 --> 00:35:41,354
Well, we all did it.

663
00:35:41,438 --> 00:35:42,650
What's the matter with you?

664
00:35:42,704 --> 00:35:45,858
- I was busy helping Jack.

665
00:35:45,996 --> 00:35:47,624
Yeah, what have you got that's so special

666
00:35:47,696 --> 00:35:49,096
you've got to keep it hidden, huh?

667
00:35:49,158 --> 00:35:50,849
- I'm gonna do it.

668
00:35:55,384 --> 00:35:56,881
What's so funny?

669
00:35:56,947 --> 00:36:00,265
You don't have hair on
your chest, like Jack does.

670
00:36:00,410 --> 00:36:01,590
You knew that.

671
00:36:01,643 --> 00:36:03,074
I don't usually like men who

672
00:36:03,137 --> 00:36:04,858
have hair on their chest, do you?

673
00:36:04,934 --> 00:36:06,339
Not usually.

674
00:36:06,401 --> 00:36:08,057
But I like you in the nude, Jack.

675
00:36:08,130 --> 00:36:09,821
I like you, too, Betsy.

676
00:36:09,894 --> 00:36:11,554
And I like you, too, Elvira.

677
00:36:11,627 --> 00:36:13,091
Why, thank you.

678
00:36:13,156 --> 00:36:14,655
I like everyone here.

679
00:36:14,721 --> 00:36:16,283
But him.

680
00:36:16,352 --> 00:36:19,510
'Cause he won't take his pants off.

681
00:36:19,648 --> 00:36:21,498
What do I get to wear?

682
00:36:21,580 --> 00:36:22,567
I've got just the thing.

683
00:36:22,611 --> 00:36:24,745
No.

684
00:36:29,865 --> 00:36:30,568
How about these?

685
00:36:30,600 --> 00:36:32,225
Not yet.

686
00:36:38,321 --> 00:36:39,501
Come on.

687
00:36:53,795 --> 00:36:55,200
Hey.

688
00:36:55,262 --> 00:36:56,696
Where did you get these Levi's?

689
00:36:56,759 --> 00:36:57,937
- Believe it or not, those

690
00:36:57,989 --> 00:37:01,116
Levi's once belonged to the Lone Ranger.

691
00:37:01,253 --> 00:37:04,600
Oh, it's turned into a roach already.

692
00:37:04,747 --> 00:37:06,150
Jack, I've gotta have boots.

693
00:37:06,212 --> 00:37:07,424
Sure thing, Kemosabe.

694
00:37:07,477 --> 00:37:09,898
"Kemosabe," that's a good one, too.

695
00:37:10,971 --> 00:37:12,152
Am I stoned, yet?

696
00:37:12,204 --> 00:37:13,669
I don't think so.

697
00:37:13,734 --> 00:37:15,393
Well, I'm sure trying.

698
00:37:15,466 --> 00:37:17,855
Jack, do you think I have
this thing on backwards?

699
00:37:17,960 --> 00:37:18,916
- Which way you facing?

700
00:37:18,958 --> 00:37:20,394
Boy, what a dumb question.

701
00:37:20,458 --> 00:37:22,115
Are you ever--

702
00:37:31,706 --> 00:37:34,321
Jesus Christ.

703
00:37:44,688 --> 00:37:46,791
Go play.

704
00:37:51,379 --> 00:37:53,547
Want to dance?

705
00:37:54,639 --> 00:37:57,000
Oh, I don't think so.

706
00:37:57,104 --> 00:37:59,271
But I'll play the piano for you.

707
00:37:59,366 --> 00:38:01,756
- Hi, there, cowboy.

708
00:38:03,824 --> 00:38:06,472
- All I know is what I
read in the newspapers.

709
00:38:06,588 --> 00:38:10,192
- Isn't the line, "I've never
met a man I didn't like?"

710
00:38:10,350 --> 00:38:12,009
- Huh?

711
00:38:12,313 --> 00:38:14,034
- Where'd you learn
to handle the rope like that?

712
00:38:14,110 --> 00:38:16,214
Just comes natural, I guess.

713
00:38:16,307 --> 00:38:18,922
Listen, how would you
like to come upstairs?

714
00:38:19,036 --> 00:38:20,247
Teach me how to do it.

715
00:38:20,301 --> 00:38:21,003
OK.

716
00:38:21,035 --> 00:38:22,947
- That was lovely, Betsy.

717
00:38:26,025 --> 00:38:28,895
What would you like to play now?

718
00:38:30,785 --> 00:38:33,177
I like to play the radio.

719
00:38:33,282 --> 00:38:35,195
Eddie.

720
00:38:35,279 --> 00:38:36,235
Yeah.

721
00:38:36,277 --> 00:38:37,489
Come dance with me.

722
00:38:37,543 --> 00:38:38,467
- Huh?

723
00:38:38,508 --> 00:38:40,165
- OK.

724
00:40:02,085 --> 00:40:03,297
Hi, there, Cowboy.

725
00:40:03,351 --> 00:40:04,498
Give it back.

726
00:40:04,549 --> 00:40:06,206
Give me my hat.

727
00:40:06,279 --> 00:40:07,713
Get it.

728
00:40:27,048 --> 00:40:29,631
What are we gonna do now?

729
00:40:33,705 --> 00:40:36,575
I think dinner is almost ready.

730
00:40:47,686 --> 00:40:50,333
- As twilight
enveloped the happy, homey house,

731
00:40:50,449 --> 00:40:53,126
in the lush little Land
of Plenty, in the serene

732
00:40:53,243 --> 00:40:56,273
City of Leisure, bordering
on Decadence to the north,

733
00:40:56,406 --> 00:40:58,829
and the state of Euphoria to the south,

734
00:40:58,935 --> 00:41:02,477
and resting lazily on the
western shore of the Idle Sea,

735
00:41:02,631 --> 00:41:06,458
Elvira and Jack, and Betsy,
and Eddie, were recovering

736
00:41:06,624 --> 00:41:09,271
from a rich, hearty meal.

737
00:41:26,395 --> 00:41:27,542
Now I have to go.

738
00:41:27,593 --> 00:41:28,135
Really?

739
00:41:28,159 --> 00:41:29,050
- Already?

740
00:41:29,090 --> 00:41:30,780
- To the toi-toi.

741
00:41:31,587 --> 00:41:33,501
Help yourself.

742
00:41:33,584 --> 00:41:35,720
I'm going to get some fresh air.

743
00:41:40,308 --> 00:41:41,996
Is it going to happen tonight, El?

744
00:41:42,071 --> 00:41:42,996
It had to.

745
00:41:43,037 --> 00:41:44,694
That's the way I look at it.

746
00:41:44,767 --> 00:41:46,680
Because if it doesn't happen tonight,

747
00:41:46,764 --> 00:41:48,199
it's not going to happen at all.

748
00:41:48,262 --> 00:41:49,952
A very astute appraisal.

749
00:41:50,027 --> 00:41:53,119
It isn't an appraisal,
Elvira, it's a reminder.

750
00:41:53,254 --> 00:41:55,645
The six months, the time limit,

751
00:41:55,750 --> 00:41:58,111
the six months will be up tomorrow.

752
00:41:58,215 --> 00:41:59,680
Tomorrow?

753
00:41:59,745 --> 00:42:01,625
Six months, those are the rules.

754
00:42:01,707 --> 00:42:03,399
I know the rules, but the exact day...

755
00:42:03,474 --> 00:42:06,565
This menu is dated, "January 10th."

756
00:42:06,700 --> 00:42:07,688
And?

757
00:42:07,732 --> 00:42:09,392
At midnight, do you
know what day it will be?

758
00:42:09,465 --> 00:42:10,389
Saturday.

759
00:42:10,431 --> 00:42:11,163
Go on.

760
00:42:11,195 --> 00:42:12,407
The 10th of July.

761
00:42:12,461 --> 00:42:15,551
Well, well, well, you did
know, after all, didn't you?

762
00:42:15,687 --> 00:42:17,379
I haven't lost this one, yet.

763
00:42:17,453 --> 00:42:18,409
But you will, El.

764
00:42:18,452 --> 00:42:19,629
You're going to lose this one.

765
00:42:19,681 --> 00:42:22,075
And the score will be tied again.

766
00:42:22,180 --> 00:42:23,135
Two and two.

767
00:42:23,177 --> 00:42:25,059
But as of now, the score is not tied.

768
00:42:25,142 --> 00:42:26,385
I am still ahead.

769
00:42:26,440 --> 00:42:27,906
Two and two, El.

770
00:42:27,971 --> 00:42:29,341
Two and two.

771
00:42:29,402 --> 00:42:30,612
The little manicurist.

772
00:42:30,665 --> 00:42:31,367
What was her name?

773
00:42:31,399 --> 00:42:33,598
You know God damn
well her name, "Linda."

774
00:42:33,694 --> 00:42:35,066
Oh, I'd forgotten it, already.

775
00:42:35,127 --> 00:42:36,560
But I knew you hadn't.

776
00:42:36,623 --> 00:42:37,643
"Linda."

777
00:42:37,689 --> 00:42:39,537
Linda and Betsy.

778
00:42:39,618 --> 00:42:40,829
That's two, El.

779
00:42:40,883 --> 00:42:42,064
I count two.

780
00:42:42,116 --> 00:42:43,327
Two big failures.

781
00:42:43,381 --> 00:42:45,262
Two big goose eggs.

782
00:42:45,345 --> 00:42:47,291
The two that got away.

783
00:42:48,173 --> 00:42:50,500
If you want to stroll
down memory lane, my love,

784
00:42:50,603 --> 00:42:52,293
we could spend an entire evening on

785
00:42:52,367 --> 00:42:54,057
the Shell gas station attendant.

786
00:42:54,132 --> 00:42:54,832
All right.

787
00:42:54,863 --> 00:42:56,776
Or the Olympic pole vaulter.

788
00:42:56,860 --> 00:42:59,506
- But, I am not playing
the game this evening.

789
00:42:59,622 --> 00:43:01,471
I'm not "at bat," as it were.

790
00:43:01,553 --> 00:43:03,244
The evening isn't over, yet.

791
00:43:03,318 --> 00:43:05,230
As far as I can see, it is.

792
00:43:05,314 --> 00:43:08,217
In fact, I'd be willing to bet it is.

793
00:43:08,344 --> 00:43:10,224
Jack?

794
00:43:10,307 --> 00:43:11,773
You're not usually a gambling man.

795
00:43:11,838 --> 00:43:13,241
- True.

796
00:43:13,303 --> 00:43:15,438
I'd even make the small token wager.

797
00:43:15,532 --> 00:43:16,999
Such as?

798
00:43:17,064 --> 00:43:19,679
The boy.

799
00:43:19,793 --> 00:43:20,972
Is he yours to bet?

800
00:43:21,025 --> 00:43:22,236
Well, what would you say?

801
00:43:22,289 --> 00:43:24,904
What would your astute appraisal be?

802
00:43:25,019 --> 00:43:26,231
I would say it would be possible,

803
00:43:26,285 --> 00:43:29,855
with a few well-chosen words,
and a pair of cowboy boots

804
00:43:30,011 --> 00:43:32,148
That is an astute appraisal.

805
00:43:32,242 --> 00:43:34,666
Well?

806
00:43:36,969 --> 00:43:39,137
I have two hours, right?

807
00:43:39,232 --> 00:43:40,408
Those are the rules.

808
00:43:40,460 --> 00:43:43,331
And, if by the end of
that two hours, I have, um,

809
00:43:43,456 --> 00:43:44,893
achieved Betsy...

810
00:43:44,956 --> 00:43:46,484
Then you may have him, too.

811
00:43:46,552 --> 00:43:48,627
I will not even touch him.

812
00:43:48,718 --> 00:43:49,706
I will dispense with him.

813
00:43:49,750 --> 00:43:51,119
I will give him to you.

814
00:43:51,179 --> 00:43:54,082
A big, personal sacrifice, I might add.

815
00:43:54,210 --> 00:43:57,780
You see, El, you wouldn't appreciate him,

816
00:43:57,936 --> 00:43:59,818
half as much as I would.

817
00:43:59,901 --> 00:44:02,611
And worse than that.

818
00:44:02,729 --> 00:44:05,056
He wouldn't appreciate you.

819
00:44:05,159 --> 00:44:06,115
The hell I do.

820
00:44:06,157 --> 00:44:07,815
Yeah, you should see yourself.

821
00:44:07,888 --> 00:44:09,706
Separate them, get him out of here,

822
00:44:09,786 --> 00:44:11,571
give me the last two hours.

823
00:44:11,650 --> 00:44:12,861
Oh, I don't know, El.

824
00:44:12,915 --> 00:44:16,230
You drive one hell of a hard bargain.

825
00:44:16,374 --> 00:44:17,842
I warn you.

826
00:44:17,906 --> 00:44:21,032
I only bet on sure things.

827
00:44:21,401 --> 00:44:23,059
Still, there's the convent between

828
00:44:23,132 --> 00:44:25,300
you and that girl.

829
00:44:25,394 --> 00:44:27,754
I'll bet on the nuns.

830
00:44:28,357 --> 00:44:30,781
- Well, how we doing?

831
00:44:31,120 --> 00:44:32,556
Well, Cowboy?

832
00:44:32,619 --> 00:44:34,021
Betsy says I look silly.

833
00:44:34,083 --> 00:44:35,039
- Not to me, you don't.

834
00:44:35,082 --> 00:44:36,293
If I didn't know better, I'd swear

835
00:44:36,345 --> 00:44:38,482
I was a cowboy, you could fool me.

836
00:44:38,576 --> 00:44:40,744
I don't want to be
belligerant, or anything,

837
00:44:40,839 --> 00:44:42,752
but if anybody saw me, I bet they'd say,

838
00:44:42,837 --> 00:44:44,750
"There goes a cowboy from Montana."

839
00:44:44,834 --> 00:44:45,790
Then again, you might say,

840
00:44:45,832 --> 00:44:47,298
There goes a native New Yorker pretending

841
00:44:47,362 --> 00:44:49,212
to be something he isn't."

842
00:44:49,294 --> 00:44:50,027
- You shut up.

843
00:44:50,059 --> 00:44:51,748
Only you're from New Jersey.

844
00:44:51,823 --> 00:44:53,577
- There's only one way to settle this.

845
00:44:53,654 --> 00:44:55,247
Ley's go see.

846
00:44:55,316 --> 00:44:57,676
We'll all go out and test Eddie,

847
00:44:57,780 --> 00:45:00,205
and I'll keep score.

848
00:45:00,310 --> 00:45:03,180
- Are you going to go like that?

849
00:45:03,305 --> 00:45:06,877
Oh, well, I don't want to go, anyway.

850
00:45:07,033 --> 00:45:09,170
I'm having too much fun here.

851
00:45:09,264 --> 00:45:10,283
Well, I'm going.

852
00:45:10,328 --> 00:45:11,924
But we'd have to take your word for it.

853
00:45:11,994 --> 00:45:13,172
- Wouldn't you
believe me, old buddy?

854
00:45:13,224 --> 00:45:14,468
I wouldn't believe you.

855
00:45:14,523 --> 00:45:17,169
Would you believe me, Betsy?

856
00:45:18,518 --> 00:45:19,920
Well, how long are you going to be gone?

857
00:45:19,982 --> 00:45:21,703
- Just a few minutes.

858
00:45:21,778 --> 00:45:22,894
No.

859
00:45:22,944 --> 00:45:25,111
We might be gone a few hours.

860
00:45:25,206 --> 00:45:26,642
Or a few days.

861
00:45:26,706 --> 00:45:29,096
Or maybe we won't come back at all.

862
00:45:30,965 --> 00:45:33,357
I'm gonna get a joint.

863
00:45:35,958 --> 00:45:38,572
"Greater love hath no man."

864
00:45:38,687 --> 00:45:42,737
It isn't love, Jack.

865
00:45:42,914 --> 00:45:46,773
That never really was
a consideration, was it?

866
00:46:06,412 --> 00:46:08,995
- Did you always fight like that?

867
00:46:09,108 --> 00:46:11,754
- Running around like
some kind of, midnight cowboy.

868
00:46:11,870 --> 00:46:14,070
He's gonna get himself arrested.

869
00:46:14,167 --> 00:46:15,059
- He's a big boy.

870
00:46:15,099 --> 00:46:16,310
- No, he isn't

871
00:46:16,364 --> 00:46:18,469
- The name of
the game is, "me first."

872
00:46:18,561 --> 00:46:20,314
It's high time you found that out.

873
00:46:20,391 --> 00:46:21,985
- He's my husband.

874
00:46:22,056 --> 00:46:23,300
- That doesn't give him

875
00:46:23,355 --> 00:46:24,756
the right to hurt you that way.

876
00:46:24,818 --> 00:46:26,285
- He doesn't mean to.

877
00:46:26,349 --> 00:46:29,219
Perhaps you never should have
married him in the first place.

878
00:46:29,345 --> 00:46:31,002
- That's what everybody said.

879
00:46:31,075 --> 00:46:33,054
Even my brother, he was
Eddie's best friend,

880
00:46:33,141 --> 00:46:35,211
and even he said, "Don't marry Eddie."

881
00:46:35,302 --> 00:46:36,736
- He'll be back.

882
00:46:36,800 --> 00:46:38,235
- I don't want him to come back.

883
00:46:38,298 --> 00:46:39,987
- If he does come
back, we won't let him in.

884
00:46:40,061 --> 00:46:41,017
- We'll lock him out.

885
00:46:41,060 --> 00:46:42,272
- Whatever you say.

886
00:46:42,326 --> 00:46:44,207
- That'll fix
him for this morning.

887
00:46:44,290 --> 00:46:46,202
- This morning?

888
00:46:46,286 --> 00:46:48,677
What happened this morning?

889
00:46:48,782 --> 00:46:51,620
- Well, he was in the bathroom,

890
00:46:51,744 --> 00:46:54,137
and I thought he was shaving, and I went

891
00:46:54,241 --> 00:46:58,292
in the door without knocking,
which is something I never do,

892
00:46:58,469 --> 00:47:03,093
and he was, he was...

893
00:47:26,928 --> 00:47:28,648
It was like that.

894
00:47:28,723 --> 00:47:31,529
I bet he was thinking of gentlemen.

895
00:47:31,652 --> 00:47:34,522
And I wasn't it, at all.

896
00:47:34,648 --> 00:47:39,432
He didn't want me.

897
00:47:44,368 --> 00:47:47,492
You're sure lucky.

898
00:47:47,865 --> 00:47:49,777
You have such beautiful long legs,

899
00:47:49,861 --> 00:47:52,505
and beautiful breasts.

900
00:47:53,389 --> 00:47:55,748
And you have Jack.

901
00:47:56,583 --> 00:47:58,242
You look so pretty in black.

902
00:48:10,297 --> 00:48:12,944
I think I'd better go.

903
00:48:13,060 --> 00:48:14,239
Did I do something?

904
00:48:14,291 --> 00:48:15,501
It wasn't you.

905
00:48:15,555 --> 00:48:16,734
Then what, on Earth, is wrong?

906
00:48:16,786 --> 00:48:19,178
I was touching you.

907
00:48:19,283 --> 00:48:21,197
- Do you think that makes you a les..
- Well, I'm not.

908
00:48:21,281 --> 00:48:23,193
- Are you afraid to stay?
- No!

909
00:48:23,277 --> 00:48:24,967
- You are, you're afraid of me.
- I am not.

910
00:48:25,042 --> 00:48:27,400
- You're afraid of yourself.
- That's ridiculous.

911
00:48:27,503 --> 00:48:29,672
Do you think if you stayed,
something might happen?

912
00:48:29,768 --> 00:48:30,947
Of course not.

913
00:48:30,999 --> 00:48:32,689
Even if we sleep in the same bed?

914
00:48:32,763 --> 00:48:34,900
You don't believe that, or you'd stay.

915
00:48:34,994 --> 00:48:37,608
I just think it would be better if I go.

916
00:48:39,485 --> 00:48:41,430
But where will I go?

917
00:48:41,516 --> 00:48:43,653
- Well, you could go home.

918
00:48:43,747 --> 00:48:45,404
- No, I want to be with someone,

919
00:48:45,477 --> 00:48:47,902
but, it should be Eddie.

920
00:48:54,199 --> 00:48:57,290
My mamma used to have a music box.

921
00:48:57,960 --> 00:49:00,638
I want you to have this one.

922
00:49:01,419 --> 00:49:03,588
A present.

923
00:49:03,950 --> 00:49:05,639
From me.

924
00:49:05,714 --> 00:49:07,820
To you.

925
00:49:08,677 --> 00:49:10,143
What's the matter?

926
00:49:10,208 --> 00:49:12,311
I have an awful headache.

927
00:49:12,403 --> 00:49:15,051
I'm afraid I'm not a very good junkie.

928
00:49:17,164 --> 00:49:20,480
Am I having, what they call a "bad trip"?

929
00:49:20,626 --> 00:49:22,093
Nothing that exciting.

930
00:49:22,157 --> 00:49:26,941
I'd say that, what you really
need is to lie down and relax.

931
00:49:28,148 --> 00:49:30,986
Except I'm sure that you'd misunderstand.

932
00:49:32,108 --> 00:49:35,714
I can't remember the
last time I had a back rub.

933
00:49:35,872 --> 00:49:37,752
Eddie's not very good at it.

934
00:49:37,834 --> 00:49:40,001
Well I am.

935
00:49:40,629 --> 00:49:43,435
My mamma used to give me back rubs.

936
00:49:43,558 --> 00:49:46,748
That's how long ago it's been.

937
00:49:50,547 --> 00:49:53,004
That feels so good.

938
00:49:53,110 --> 00:49:56,138
So fucking good.

939
00:49:56,840 --> 00:49:58,464
That's the first time

940
00:49:58,535 --> 00:50:01,181
I've ever said "fuck" in my whole life!

941
00:50:01,833 --> 00:50:04,189
Fuck, fuck, fuck!

942
00:50:06,757 --> 00:50:09,627
<i>I lost my true lover</i>

943
00:50:09,753 --> 00:50:12,879
<i>For portin' too slow</i>

944
00:50:13,014 --> 00:50:14,002
- Hello!

945
00:50:14,046 --> 00:50:14,971
We're back!

946
00:50:15,012 --> 00:50:15,968
- Shh!

947
00:50:16,009 --> 00:50:17,187
Where is everybody?

948
00:50:17,239 --> 00:50:18,195
Shh!

949
00:50:18,238 --> 00:50:20,408
One... shh...

950
00:50:20,503 --> 00:50:21,427
Here.

951
00:50:21,468 --> 00:50:22,936
You work on this, Cowboy.

952
00:50:23,000 --> 00:50:24,497
Just go downstairs in the den.

953
00:50:24,563 --> 00:50:25,680
Wait for me there.

954
00:50:25,730 --> 00:50:27,417
I'll go see how the girls are doing.

955
00:50:27,491 --> 00:50:29,117
Jack.

956
00:50:47,162 --> 00:50:48,149
Hello?

957
00:50:48,193 --> 00:50:49,118
Is she there?

958
00:50:49,160 --> 00:50:50,115
Who is that, Eddie?

959
00:50:50,157 --> 00:50:51,625
My stockbroker.

960
00:50:51,690 --> 00:50:52,838
At this hour?

961
00:50:52,889 --> 00:50:55,280
He's, um, calling from New York.

962
00:50:55,385 --> 00:50:58,255
Quicksilver, nothing's happened.

963
00:50:58,381 --> 00:50:59,881
But I still have 20.

964
00:50:59,946 --> 00:51:02,272
Is that what your records show?

965
00:51:02,374 --> 00:51:03,586
Concede.

966
00:51:03,640 --> 00:51:05,072
- Not on your life.

967
00:51:05,135 --> 00:51:07,273
Would you prefer we stay downstairs?

968
00:51:07,367 --> 00:51:09,280
Would you mind, terribly?

969
00:51:09,364 --> 00:51:12,490
You know, you could
buy another hour or two.

970
00:51:12,627 --> 00:51:13,805
- How?

971
00:51:13,857 --> 00:51:15,291
Forget about the side bet.

972
00:51:15,355 --> 00:51:17,556
- That's what I
thought you had in mind.

973
00:51:17,652 --> 00:51:18,607
Never.

974
00:51:18,650 --> 00:51:21,934
I am not interested in that stock.

975
00:51:22,078 --> 00:51:23,514
OK, 20 minutes.

976
00:51:23,577 --> 00:51:25,298
But, if you're not down here, gloating,

977
00:51:25,374 --> 00:51:28,913
over your latest
achievement, the boy is mine.

978
00:51:29,067 --> 00:51:31,524
- 20, it is.

979
00:51:31,631 --> 00:51:32,999
And not a point more.

980
00:51:33,060 --> 00:51:35,263
Scorpio, signing off.

981
00:51:36,791 --> 00:51:39,180
- What did your broker say?

982
00:51:39,552 --> 00:51:41,242
Oh, the usual.

983
00:51:41,317 --> 00:51:45,367
Some things are going up, and
some things are going down.

984
00:51:45,544 --> 00:51:47,234
The girls got tired of waiting up,

985
00:51:47,308 --> 00:51:48,519
decided to go to sleep.

986
00:51:48,573 --> 00:51:50,709
- Well, wake 'em up,
I want to tell her who won.

987
00:51:50,803 --> 00:51:52,684
- Tell her in the morning, old buddy.
- I want to tell her now.

988
00:51:52,767 --> 00:51:54,934
- Look, old buddy.
- Yeah, old buddy?

989
00:51:55,029 --> 00:51:56,656
You know, and I know, that everybody

990
00:51:56,728 --> 00:51:58,226
thought you were a cowboy.

991
00:51:58,292 --> 00:51:59,949
Isn't that enough?

992
00:52:00,022 --> 00:52:02,126
Well, I've got to get her up
and take her home, anyway.

993
00:52:02,218 --> 00:52:04,451
Oh, let her sleep.

994
00:52:04,549 --> 00:52:06,493
You don't have to get up in the morning.

995
00:52:06,579 --> 00:52:08,141
It's Saturday.

996
00:52:08,210 --> 00:52:08,974
Sleep over.

997
00:52:09,008 --> 00:52:09,710
Where?

998
00:52:09,741 --> 00:52:10,473
On the floor?

999
00:52:10,506 --> 00:52:11,907
No, this opens up.

1000
00:52:11,969 --> 00:52:13,882
No.

1001
00:52:14,200 --> 00:52:15,667
Magic.

1002
00:52:15,997 --> 00:52:19,762
Maybe I should just go tell
him, I saw him this morning.

1003
00:52:19,926 --> 00:52:21,616
- Not tonight.

1004
00:52:21,690 --> 00:52:22,869
You're not thinking clearly.

1005
00:52:22,921 --> 00:52:24,611
- Oh, yes, I am, Elvira.

1006
00:52:24,686 --> 00:52:28,033
I am totally, um, together.

1007
00:52:28,179 --> 00:52:30,379
Wait until morning.

1008
00:52:30,476 --> 00:52:33,091
You'll be in complete control, then.

1009
00:52:33,206 --> 00:52:35,789
- Well, that makes sense.

1010
00:52:35,901 --> 00:52:39,249
You always make sense, Elvira.

1011
00:52:39,395 --> 00:52:43,191
- Now, close your eyes.

1012
00:52:43,357 --> 00:52:45,302
- I'll stay.

1013
00:52:46,852 --> 00:52:49,499
Boy, you're certainly having a hell
of a time with that, old buddy.

1014
00:52:49,615 --> 00:52:52,740
Well, don't just sit there
on your butt, give me a hand!

1015
00:52:53,143 --> 00:52:55,024
All right, just relax.

1016
00:52:57,835 --> 00:52:59,302
Relax.

1017
00:52:59,367 --> 00:53:02,236
I was afraid you might
not be able to sleep.

1018
00:53:02,362 --> 00:53:04,468
In this bed.

1019
00:53:04,560 --> 00:53:07,685
Knowing what happened here, last night.

1020
00:53:08,088 --> 00:53:10,448
I hadn't even thought
about it, 'til now.

1021
00:53:10,552 --> 00:53:14,440
- Oh, I'm sorry.

1022
00:53:14,610 --> 00:53:15,981
Don't apologize.

1023
00:53:16,042 --> 00:53:18,242
- My stomach's not
feeling too good, tonight.

1024
00:53:18,338 --> 00:53:20,443
You're really a big worrier, aren't you?

1025
00:53:20,536 --> 00:53:22,449
- That's what they tell me.

1026
00:53:22,533 --> 00:53:24,702
Really at odds with yourself.

1027
00:53:24,797 --> 00:53:26,230
What is it, the job?

1028
00:53:26,294 --> 00:53:27,473
That's part of it.

1029
00:53:27,525 --> 00:53:29,661
- Oh.
- What is this, I don't even know you.

1030
00:53:29,755 --> 00:53:32,402
How can I tell you the
story of my life, just like that?

1031
00:53:32,518 --> 00:53:33,952
That's the secret, Cowboy.

1032
00:53:34,015 --> 00:53:35,673
Only talk to strangers.

1033
00:53:35,746 --> 00:53:37,882
Don't tell your friends a God damn thing.

1034
00:53:37,976 --> 00:53:40,400
There's some kind of crazy
logic in that, isn't there?

1035
00:53:40,506 --> 00:53:41,461
A little music?

1036
00:53:43,236 --> 00:53:44,669
- You know when
you hate to go to work

1037
00:53:44,732 --> 00:53:46,390
in the morning, and you
hate to come home at night,

1038
00:53:46,464 --> 00:53:47,898
there's not a hell of a lot left.

1039
00:53:47,961 --> 00:53:49,651
Made a mistake or two, huh?

1040
00:53:49,725 --> 00:53:51,191
- Or 50.

1041
00:53:59,480 --> 00:54:01,105
- What are you doing?

1042
00:54:03,439 --> 00:54:04,906
Smoking.

1043
00:54:05,436 --> 00:54:06,648
OK.

1044
00:54:06,702 --> 00:54:07,658
Do you want a pill?

1045
00:54:07,700 --> 00:54:09,357
I can't take the pill, I'm Catholic.

1046
00:54:09,430 --> 00:54:10,865
Not "the" pill.

1047
00:54:10,929 --> 00:54:14,979
- "A" pill.
- Did you ever see that poster

1048
00:54:15,156 --> 00:54:18,248
in the States that says,
"The pill is a no-no."

1049
00:54:19,649 --> 00:54:21,594
Want me to tell you something?

1050
00:54:21,679 --> 00:54:23,561
- What?

1051
00:54:23,644 --> 00:54:25,811
I think marriage is a "no-no."

1052
00:54:25,907 --> 00:54:27,851
Maybe.

1053
00:54:27,936 --> 00:54:29,563
For you.

1054
00:54:29,635 --> 00:54:33,429
- You're so lucky
to have somebody like Jack.

1055
00:54:33,595 --> 00:54:36,242
- I suppose.

1056
00:54:36,890 --> 00:54:39,026
Jack and I have a pretty good arrangement.

1057
00:54:39,120 --> 00:54:40,555
- Damn near perfect for us.

1058
00:54:40,618 --> 00:54:42,275
And then, there's my work.

1059
00:54:42,348 --> 00:54:44,261
- What kind of
photography do you do?

1060
00:54:44,345 --> 00:54:45,557
- Fashion.

1061
00:54:45,611 --> 00:54:47,492
Female and male.

1062
00:54:47,575 --> 00:54:48,563
A little of each.

1063
00:54:48,607 --> 00:54:50,264
- Oh, yeah?

1064
00:54:52,333 --> 00:54:54,469
How long has it been, since
you looked at one of those?

1065
00:54:54,563 --> 00:54:55,774
About a year.

1066
00:54:55,828 --> 00:54:57,263
- Eddie had
been to this convention.

1067
00:54:57,326 --> 00:54:59,016
and when he came home, I was going

1068
00:54:59,090 --> 00:55:02,183
to unpack a suitcase,
but he wouldn't let me.

1069
00:55:02,319 --> 00:55:04,902
I didn't think much about it, at the time.

1070
00:55:05,015 --> 00:55:06,735
- Ever look at the others?

1071
00:55:06,811 --> 00:55:08,663
Yeah, once.

1072
00:55:08,743 --> 00:55:10,432
And then, the next day, I was throwing

1073
00:55:10,507 --> 00:55:13,154
out the garbage, and the sack broke.

1074
00:55:13,270 --> 00:55:16,873
And there were all these dirty magazines.

1075
00:55:17,031 --> 00:55:19,390
Except they were men.

1076
00:55:19,493 --> 00:55:20,992
Naked men.

1077
00:55:21,058 --> 00:55:22,205
Maybe he likes both.

1078
00:55:22,256 --> 00:55:24,871
Jack's been to bed with a man, before.

1079
00:55:24,986 --> 00:55:26,420
- Well, have you?

1080
00:55:26,483 --> 00:55:27,438
What?

1081
00:55:27,481 --> 00:55:29,906
Ever been to bed with a man before?

1082
00:55:30,012 --> 00:55:31,191
No.

1083
00:55:31,243 --> 00:55:34,080
He wants to, but I don't think he has.

1084
00:55:34,205 --> 00:55:36,373
Well, not since I was 15, you know,

1085
00:55:36,468 --> 00:55:37,903
a little mutual messing around.

1086
00:55:37,966 --> 00:55:40,388
- I guess we've
all done a little of that.

1087
00:55:40,495 --> 00:55:42,601
- Did you ever tell Elvira?
- Elvira?

1088
00:55:42,692 --> 00:55:44,351
Let me tell you something.

1089
00:55:44,424 --> 00:55:48,027
I don't usually like to talk about it,
but, what the hell?

1090
00:55:48,185 --> 00:55:50,097
You know, when I first met Elvira,

1091
00:55:50,181 --> 00:55:54,008
it took me a long time to get used to her.

1092
00:55:54,176 --> 00:55:56,314
Up and down the coast, everybody knew her.

1093
00:55:56,407 --> 00:55:57,584
Or knew of her.

1094
00:55:57,637 --> 00:55:58,881
Her adventures.

1095
00:55:58,936 --> 00:56:00,849
And then, little by little, I found out

1096
00:56:00,933 --> 00:56:03,994
that everything I'd
heard about her was true.

1097
00:56:04,128 --> 00:56:07,476
But it didn't matter, because
I still wanted to marry her.

1098
00:56:07,622 --> 00:56:09,822
But before I asked her, I said..

1099
00:56:09,919 --> 00:56:13,937
Elvira? I know you'd just
as soon jump in the sack

1100
00:56:14,113 --> 00:56:16,026
with a woman as a man, wouldn't you?

1101
00:56:16,110 --> 00:56:17,798
Jack.

1102
00:56:17,872 --> 00:56:19,531
I'd jump in the sack with a porcupine,

1103
00:56:19,604 --> 00:56:23,431
- if it struck my fancy.
- Didn't make any sense to me, then,

1104
00:56:23,599 --> 00:56:27,170
but, over the years,
it's begun to rub off.

1105
00:56:27,892 --> 00:56:29,997
- Did I ever
tell you how I met Eddie?

1106
00:56:31,320 --> 00:56:32,277
No.

1107
00:56:32,320 --> 00:56:34,711
- I've known him all my life.

1108
00:56:34,816 --> 00:56:36,952
He's my brother's best friend.

1109
00:56:37,046 --> 00:56:39,723
He and Tommy were inseparable.

1110
00:56:39,840 --> 00:56:41,212
Tommy.

1111
00:56:41,273 --> 00:56:42,770
- This kid who
lived around the corner.

1112
00:56:42,836 --> 00:56:44,749
He was a year older than I was.

1113
00:56:44,833 --> 00:56:46,460
We used to go down to the basement.

1114
00:56:46,532 --> 00:56:47,742
Where's your brother now?

1115
00:56:47,796 --> 00:56:48,976
- Oh, he's in Hollywood,

1116
00:56:49,028 --> 00:56:50,908
trying to get into the movies.

1117
00:56:50,991 --> 00:56:52,266
- Movies, huh?

1118
00:56:52,322 --> 00:56:54,395
I've been making movies, myself,lately.

1119
00:56:54,486 --> 00:56:55,697
- Oh, yeah?

1120
00:56:55,751 --> 00:56:56,738
- Yeah.

1121
00:56:56,782 --> 00:57:00,355
It's about these two guys who
meet on a bus trip, out west.

1122
00:57:00,511 --> 00:57:01,435
- Out west?

1123
00:57:01,476 --> 00:57:02,717
Seems like a...

1124
00:57:02,772 --> 00:57:04,400
Well, I suppose you've
seen it, so many times.

1125
00:57:04,472 --> 00:57:07,597
No, as a matter of fact,
I was thinking of running it,tonight.

1126
00:57:07,734 --> 00:57:11,113
I want to cut out a couple of shots.

1127
00:57:11,261 --> 00:57:13,621
- Well, go ahead, I don't mind.

1128
00:57:13,724 --> 00:57:15,158
I'm not really very sleepy.

1129
00:57:15,222 --> 00:57:18,794
I don't know how I'm
going to get to sleep.

1130
00:57:21,447 --> 00:57:22,881
- We'll have to
show it on the wall.

1131
00:57:22,944 --> 00:57:24,155
Screen's up in the bedroom, and

1132
00:57:24,209 --> 00:57:25,866
we don't want to wake the girls.

1133
00:57:25,939 --> 00:57:27,119
- Want another backrub?

1134
00:57:27,171 --> 00:57:28,382
- That would be nice.

1135
00:57:28,436 --> 00:57:29,838
- I've got a better idea.

1136
00:57:29,900 --> 00:57:31,622
- What's that?

1137
00:57:37,157 --> 00:57:40,281
- Hey, I said "the
wall," not "your belly."

1138
00:57:53,134 --> 00:57:54,758
- Come.

1139
00:58:28,779 --> 00:58:31,427
- Wild, pretty wild.

1140
00:58:45,221 --> 00:58:47,422
It's better, stoned.

1141
00:58:58,468 --> 00:59:00,605
- Much better.

1142
00:59:01,197 --> 00:59:04,067
- I sleep in the raw.

1143
00:59:04,491 --> 00:59:06,821
Do you mind?

1144
00:59:22,634 --> 00:59:24,610
You're the boss.

1145
00:59:32,118 --> 00:59:33,777
Do you?

1146
00:59:33,850 --> 00:59:34,839
Sometimes.

1147
00:59:34,883 --> 00:59:36,540
Sometimes?

1148
00:59:36,613 --> 00:59:38,748
Are you gonna sleep in all that denim?

1149
00:59:44,367 --> 00:59:46,760
I never could sleep in much of anything.

1150
00:59:46,865 --> 00:59:48,744
Could you?

1151
00:59:53,353 --> 00:59:55,936
I do, sometimes.

1152
00:59:57,547 --> 00:59:59,716
I kind of hate to take it off.

1153
00:59:59,811 --> 01:00:04,117
I had such a good time, tonight.

1154
01:00:06,335 --> 01:00:09,173
Such a good time.

1155
01:02:52,454 --> 01:02:54,037
What time is it?

1156
01:02:55,150 --> 01:02:56,615
- Nearly midnight.

1157
01:02:56,616 --> 01:02:58,371
- Nearly midnight?

1158
01:02:59,445 --> 01:03:00,804
A little before.

1159
01:03:01,908 --> 01:03:03,341
That clock's slow.

1160
01:03:03,342 --> 01:03:04,797
That watch is fast.

1161
01:03:07,166 --> 01:03:07,704
- Bingo.

1162
01:03:07,705 --> 01:03:10,389
- Bingo...

1163
01:21:12,173 --> 01:21:13,321
- Good morning.

1164
01:21:14,173 --> 01:21:15,321
- Sleep well?

1165
01:21:14,551 --> 01:21:17,272
- Yes.

1166
01:22:08,173 --> 01:22:08,490
Eddie.

1167
01:22:08,492 --> 01:22:09,195
Eddie?

1168
01:22:11,056 --> 01:22:11,758
Hey there, Cowboy.

1169
01:22:12,619 --> 01:22:14,184
Bad dream?

1170
01:22:15,072 --> 01:22:15,606
Jack.

1171
01:22:16,501 --> 01:22:18,381
Oh, yeah, a bad dream.

1172
01:22:19,206 --> 01:22:20,436
What was it?

1173
01:22:20,438 --> 01:22:20,851
Can't remember?

1174
01:22:21,760 --> 01:22:23,399
No, I never can.

1175
01:22:24,273 --> 01:22:26,442
Don't worry about it.

1176
01:22:27,210 --> 01:22:28,108
OK.

1177
01:22:52,507 --> 01:22:52,747
- Good morning.

1178
01:22:52,748 --> 01:22:55,318
- We've got to get out of here.
- What's the matter with you?

1179
01:22:55,319 --> 01:22:57,388
- We've got to get out of here.
- What's the rush?

1180
01:22:57,389 --> 01:22:59,034
We'll talk about it later.

1181
01:22:59,035 --> 01:23:00,420
Look, are you telling me what to do?

1182
01:23:00,421 --> 01:23:01,770
- God damn right, I am.

1183
01:23:01,771 --> 01:23:02,770
- Oh, Eddie.

1184
01:23:04,770 --> 01:23:06,770
I'm so tired of trying, aren't you?

1185
01:23:06,771 --> 01:23:06,851
Maybe, we could--

1186
01:23:06,852 --> 01:23:08,121
No more "maybes."

1187
01:23:08,122 --> 01:23:10,948
We've got to stop pretending
and blaming each other.

1188
01:23:10,949 --> 01:23:13,051
I've blamed you for so long.

1189
01:23:13,052 --> 01:23:15,051
That's all right.

1190
01:23:15,052 --> 01:23:17,307
No, I was wrong, don't
you see, it was me.

1191
01:23:18,307 --> 01:23:20,709
Look, maybe you and I were a mistake.

1192
01:23:20,710 --> 01:23:23,094
But that doesn't mean we belong here.

1193
01:23:23,095 --> 01:23:24,094
- I do.

1194
01:23:25,404 --> 01:23:28,478
- No, maybe I do.

1195
01:23:29,270 --> 01:23:30,041
But not you.

1196
01:23:32,270 --> 01:23:33,041
Oh.

1197
01:23:35,427 --> 01:23:38,829
Well, we seem to be porcupines
all over the place, this morning.

1198
01:23:39,436 --> 01:23:39,933
- "Porcupines"?

1199
01:23:41,862 --> 01:23:43,986
- Eddie, did you...?

1200
01:23:46,769 --> 01:23:48,281
- Did you?

1201
01:23:48,288 --> 01:23:49,744
- Yep.

1202
01:23:50,636 --> 01:23:51,878
- Wow.

1203
01:23:51,879 --> 01:23:53,275
- The score remains, two to one.

1204
01:23:53,276 --> 01:23:55,772
- Congratulations.
- As it happened, at the stroke of midnight,

1205
01:23:55,773 --> 01:23:58,251
I was too involved to file a report.

1206
01:23:58,252 --> 01:23:59,589
That's what I figured.

1207
01:24:00,503 --> 01:24:01,821
So, I helped myself.

1208
01:24:01,822 --> 01:24:02,821
Do you mind?

1209
01:24:02,822 --> 01:24:05,594
- You always find
the "Escape Clause," Jack.

1210
01:24:05,595 --> 01:24:06,769
Where is he?

1211
01:24:06,770 --> 01:24:07,088
- With Betsy.

1212
01:24:07,102 --> 01:24:09,589
A bad case of "the morning after."

1213
01:24:09,590 --> 01:24:10,789
How was she?

1214
01:24:10,790 --> 01:24:13,620
Ready to put a down payment on
the vine covered cottage.

1215
01:24:13,621 --> 01:24:14,767
How was he?

1216
01:24:14,800 --> 01:24:17,199
A very gifted amateur.

1217
01:24:17,200 --> 01:24:18,414
Do you want him?

1218
01:24:18,415 --> 01:24:19,054
- Not really.

1219
01:24:19,055 --> 01:24:21,931
Oh, it's just as well.

1220
01:24:21,932 --> 01:24:24,565
I doubt that he'd be interested,
now that he's found himself.

1221
01:24:24,611 --> 01:24:27,177
In that case, I might be interested.

1222
01:24:28,033 --> 01:24:28,544
The turn-about?

1223
01:24:28,546 --> 01:24:31,489
- Why not?
That should annihilate the day.

1224
01:24:33,299 --> 01:24:35,987
You don't suppose they'll want to
stay the whole weekend, do you?

1225
01:24:35,989 --> 01:24:39,399
I doubt it.
Church on Sunday, you know.

1226
01:24:39,495 --> 01:24:41,105
They'll get there early, this week.

1227
01:24:41,106 --> 01:24:43,289
In the meantime, however...

1228
01:24:43,290 --> 01:24:45,722
Yes, there is always "the meantime."

1229
01:24:45,742 --> 01:24:46,398
Always.

1230
01:24:57,070 --> 01:24:59,506
- Hey, is the, uh, "lady
of the house" home?

1231
01:24:59,507 --> 01:25:01,166
I'm Jack, I live here.

1232
01:25:01,882 --> 01:25:02,193
Mike.

1233
01:25:02,277 --> 01:25:03,528
- "Mike."

1234
01:25:03,530 --> 01:25:05,930
Yeah, Elvira speaks very highly of you.

1235
01:25:05,932 --> 01:25:08,407
I've heard a lot about you, too, Jack.

1236
01:25:10,497 --> 01:25:11,554
-Mike.

1237
01:25:11,555 --> 01:25:13,408
- Well, you said
to come back, any time.

1238
01:25:13,410 --> 01:25:15,520
- You remember Betsy.
- Hi.

1239
01:25:17,521 --> 01:25:19,841
- And this is Eddie.
- How are you?

1240
01:25:19,842 --> 01:25:22,605
- The husband.
- Oh, hi.

1241
01:25:37,106 --> 01:25:41,101
- I'm going to get our things.
- Hey, wai...

1242
01:25:41,102 --> 01:25:42,447
Excuse me.

1243
01:25:42,448 --> 01:25:44,155
- Give ya a minute.

1244
01:25:45,777 --> 01:25:48,244
Hell of a party, for so
early in the morning.

1245
01:25:48,245 --> 01:25:49,862
Leftovers, strictly leftovers.

1246
01:25:49,863 --> 01:25:52,267
There are Bloody Marys on ice, Jack.

1247
01:25:52,268 --> 01:25:54,282
- Betsy, you can't
change your whole life,

1248
01:25:54,283 --> 01:25:56,216
just because you got stoned one night.

1249
01:26:02,303 --> 01:26:03,282
Well, I'm leaving.

1250
01:26:03,888 --> 01:26:05,013
- Well, it seems to me,

1251
01:26:05,014 --> 01:26:07,528
that you could give it a
little more of a chance.

1252
01:26:07,529 --> 01:26:10,502
- But then, I don't really care.
- A little family squabble, eh?

1253
01:26:10,503 --> 01:26:12,647
Nothing serious.
My husband's leaving.

1254
01:26:12,648 --> 01:26:16,108
Betsy, why don't you
get Mike a cup of coffee?

1255
01:26:16,109 --> 01:26:16,388
No, thanks.

1256
01:26:16,389 --> 01:26:18,636
Oh, she pulled that one on you, huh?

1257
01:26:18,637 --> 01:26:20,796
- Do we have to
go through that again?

1258
01:26:20,797 --> 01:26:22,649
Oh, we play all kinds
of games around here

1259
01:26:22,650 --> 01:26:23,560
- I noticed.

1260
01:26:25,034 --> 01:26:26,578
Still got your Polaroid?

1261
01:26:26,722 --> 01:26:30,103
- Well, old buddy,
what shall we do for starters?

1262
01:26:30,104 --> 01:26:32,426
Dump Bloody Marys all over each other?

1263
01:26:32,427 --> 01:26:34,876
Let's skip the preliminary festivities,
and get to the games.

1264
01:26:35,071 --> 01:26:36,432
- What did you have in mind?

1265
01:26:36,433 --> 01:26:38,919
Well, I'll try anything once.

1266
01:26:38,920 --> 01:26:41,007
There's a first time for everything.

1267
01:26:41,008 --> 01:26:42,742
- Except, this isn't
the first time, is it?

1268
01:26:43,621 --> 01:26:46,491
Well, I don't keep score.

1269
01:27:00,501 --> 01:27:03,367
You sure as hell know
how to throw a good party.

1270
01:27:05,836 --> 01:27:10,001
Hey, Jack!
Where the hell did you get those?

1271
01:27:10,002 --> 01:27:11,691
We haven't had any of
those since Amsterdam.

1272
01:27:11,692 --> 01:27:14,493
- Hey, you better catch up.
- Give her one of those, Mike.

1273
01:27:14,494 --> 01:27:16,588
In ten minutes shell be
laughing her head off.

1274
01:27:16,599 --> 01:27:18,921
Should I, Elvira?

1275
01:27:18,936 --> 01:27:20,823
For old time's sake.

1276
01:27:22,628 --> 01:27:24,896
- Here we go.

1277
01:27:27,650 --> 01:27:30,665
Look at these little, cute panties.

1278
01:27:31,469 --> 01:27:32,560
- Bull's eye.

1279
01:27:36,268 --> 01:27:37,771
- Oh, sorry, Elvira.

1280
01:27:37,772 --> 01:27:39,444
Say, sweetheart, where did you go?

1281
01:27:39,445 --> 01:27:41,341
Don't be so standoffish.

1282
01:27:47,671 --> 01:27:50,216
I've got this German Shepherd at home,
and you know what he calls this?

1283
01:27:50,218 --> 01:27:51,362
"People style."

1284
01:27:52,363 --> 01:27:54,362
I'm sorry,I'm such a hurriest

1285
01:27:55,120 --> 01:27:56,572
Hey, buddy.

1286
01:27:56,573 --> 01:27:57,588
Where do you work out?

1287
01:27:58,589 --> 01:28:01,371
Later, Jack, can't you see I'm busy?

1288
01:28:01,372 --> 01:28:02,871
- Hey,You can leave me.

1289
01:28:04,068 --> 01:28:08,558
Elvira, Elvira, remember
what I said this morning?

1290
01:28:08,559 --> 01:28:10,362
Everything I said was true.

1291
01:28:10,363 --> 01:28:12,337
It doesn't really matter who you love,

1292
01:28:12,338 --> 01:28:14,388
just as long as you do.

1293
01:28:15,583 --> 01:28:16,918
- Your knee is in my...

1294
01:28:26,718 --> 01:28:29,008
Eddie, honey, where are you going?

1295
01:28:30,009 --> 01:28:30,848
I don't know.

1296
01:28:32,126 --> 01:28:34,170
Are you gonna go home?

1297
01:28:34,186 --> 01:28:35,731
I don't know where I'm going.

1298
01:28:36,606 --> 01:28:39,462
Well, why don't you go bowling?

1299
01:28:39,999 --> 01:28:40,994
- "Bowling"?

1300
01:28:40,995 --> 01:28:41,995
- Bowling.

1301
01:28:42,595 --> 01:28:43,100
- Bowling.

1302
01:28:43,109 --> 01:28:44,613
Uh, where do you go?

1303
01:28:45,515 --> 01:28:47,959
About ten kilometers south of here.

1304
01:28:47,960 --> 01:28:50,571
I know that place, I go there, myself.

1305
01:28:50,572 --> 01:28:51,687
Oh, yeah?

1306
01:28:51,688 --> 01:28:54,885
We go there, all the time.
Don't we, Eddie?

1307
01:28:55,654 --> 01:28:58,089
Eddie bought me a bowling
ball for Christmas.

1308
01:28:58,090 --> 01:28:59,325
- Well, I've got one, too.

1309
01:28:59,326 --> 01:29:01,447
Oh, yeah?
So have I.

1310
01:29:03,015 --> 01:29:06,458
You'll have to come
over and see it, sometime.

1311
01:29:09,178 --> 01:29:10,435
- When?

1312
01:29:12,950 --> 01:29:14,755
Well, how about right now?

1313
01:29:15,600 --> 01:29:17,553
- Let's get this show on the road.

1314
01:29:17,554 --> 01:29:20,720
You can come over brunch,
and you and Eddie can...

1315
01:29:20,721 --> 01:29:22,498
"Watch television."

1316
01:29:22,499 --> 01:29:23,174
- Yeah.

1317
01:29:23,175 --> 01:29:25,008
Son of a bitch.

1318
01:29:25,009 --> 01:29:27,396
We've imposed on your
hospitality long enough.

1319
01:29:28,899 --> 01:29:30,391
How do you think we'll
do in the Olympics?

1320
01:29:33,160 --> 01:29:36,988
- Hey, why don't we all get together
one evening, next week,

1321
01:29:36,989 --> 01:29:38,922
and play "Bingo."

1322
01:29:53,106 --> 01:29:57,054
Well, Svengali darling, there goes Trilby.

1323
01:29:57,055 --> 01:30:01,887
Looking suspiciously like
the Frankenstein monster.

1324
01:30:04,496 --> 01:30:07,296
- And so,
like all fairy tales,

1325
01:30:07,297 --> 01:30:09,496
everyone had a happy ending.

1326
01:30:09,497 --> 01:30:12,024
At the stroke of midnight, Cinderella

1327
01:30:12,025 --> 01:30:14,614
turned into the Wicked Witch of the West.

1328
01:30:14,615 --> 01:30:19,335
And the Big Bad Wolf made
friends with Prince Charming.

1329
01:30:19,335 --> 01:30:23,599
Fairy tales do, indeed,
make strange bedfellows.

1330
01:30:23,600 --> 01:30:26,682
As for Mamma & Pappa Bear,
they remained

1331
01:30:26,683 --> 01:30:31,045
bosom buddies, devoted
chums, the best of friends,

1332
01:30:31,046 --> 01:30:33,059
husband and wife.

1333
01:30:33,060 --> 01:30:33,996
The perfect marriage.

1334
01:30:36,837 --> 01:30:38,467
Now, where were we?

1335
01:30:38,468 --> 01:30:41,436
There's the new Michael
Powell film at the cinema.

1336
01:30:55,843 --> 01:30:58,910
- Let's have a cup of
coffee here, after the movie.

1337
01:30:59,704 --> 01:31:01,885
- Good idea.

1338
01:31:14,495 --> 01:31:17,246
- In the meantime,
what is the always the meantime,

1339
01:31:17,247 --> 01:31:22,015
fantasy reigns supreme,
and all the people of Leisure,

1340
01:31:22,016 --> 01:31:24,339
in the lush little Land of Plenty,

1341
01:31:24,340 --> 01:31:27,657
lived happily, if loosely, ever after.