Shelley masterton. 26 years old. Unmarried.
She came into an enormous inheritance.
The major stockholder of a vast international business complex.
Her personal fortune at least 30 million
and getting bigger all the time.
You've really done your homework.
I know more about her than her best friend does.
Who she knows, where she goes, what she does.
What do you figure the take's going to be?
You name it. The sky's the limit.
She could even pay off the national debt and not even feel it.
All right, I'll stake you. How much do you need?
Say 10,000. You've got it.
And I get my investment back plus 50% of your take.
40. 50.
Argue and it'll be 60.
A conman's handshake isn't worth much.
My security is that you know nobody ever got away with crossing me.
Just make sure you get every penny she's got.
Everything.
Buenas noches.
Sounds like $10,720.
No, it's £27 but that was very close. Very good.
What is the romance between you Americans and poker?
You spend three days and nights playing poker to pick...
Well, man, it's the game. It's the game.
It's bluffing. It's calling the odds. I tell ya.
And tonight I was superb. In two words "su perb."
It's a pity you don't want to talk about it.
Wanna hear about the game? No, no, no.
I like the way you put that. It's a terrific seat.
I'm in against one player, a Spanish aristocrat.
Like a count or a Duke or a king or queen, something like that.
Anyway, all of a sudden I find i'm out seven then into him for five.
Hundreds? What hundreds? Thousands!
El pokerino, all of a sudden he gets really hot. He's murdering me.
Then the next thing I know he gets cold. Then hot. Then cold.
Then you started winning, right? Right.
All of a sudden, I couldn't do wrong.
I was drawing the inside straights.
And the next thing I know, I'm the papa of 100,000 smackers.
Like a lamb to the slaughter. Right.
First of all, he took you for 10,000, right?
Then he stepped outside and when he came back you started winning.
Beautiful.
It's the oldest gag in the world.
First of all he, er... took your real cash.
And then he fed you back funny money.
Right. Counterfeit.
You knew? Yeah, sure, of course.
You... did get your money back, though?
Sure. After the game I took him out and gave him a crash course in pain.
Why, I do love a game loser. Crash
get up! Please, John. I warned you about him.
I haven't finished with you, foster. Believe that.
Now, there must be some better way. Good evening.
Thank you. You were quite a help. A drink would be a better one.
Now, what will you have? A whisky soda.
Daniel? I'll have a whisky soda.
Two whisky sodas, please, and I'll have another Brandy.
Your daughter? No, no. Shelley masterton.
Oh, the soap heiress. She's worth $30m.
That's a lot of suds. And you, sir?
Hatton, John hatton. I'm her financial advisor.
I've looked after her affairs since her parents died.
Never any problem. Till now. The problem's Carl foster.
You know him? That's the guy there.
I know him and every hotel manager in Miami knows him.
When he comes into town, they lock up the wives, daughters and widows.
I assume that means he's a rich-lady mechanic.
Right, once around the track, tug at the heart, the money's gone.
Shelley knows that. But she thinks this time's different.
True. She believes he's reformed, this is the real thing.
Yeah, real. Real robbery! Nicely put, Daniel.
Poor girl. There's nothing I can do to stop them getting married.
Now will you stand there with an apple on your head? No.
I'm gonna take red, I think. That's a good choice.
I think so.
Watch, kiddo.
I meant blue. Not red, it was blue I meant.
Colour blind. Mother's side of the family. Mm-hm.
Shelley masterton. Nice girl.
Too much of a pushover for a guy like foster.
Yellow. Pun intended.
Luck. Your not suggesting we take a hand, are you?
I was thinking about it. It's liable to broaden her horizons.
Show the limitations of foster compared to...
Clean-cut, up and up, handsome... Maybe a little too handsome.
Yes, slight raffish perhaps,
cool, sophisticated, just this side of devastating.
You're right. I could do it. I really could do it.
You?! Certainly me. The shoe fits.
Not you. I would be the natural choice.
There's a way of deciding a natural choice, you know.
Yes, and it would add credibility to the situation.
And flatter the girl.
But it's too much, you and me up against each other.
You wanna bet? Put your money where your mouth is.
Five. You're on. Winner takes all?
No holds barred. No holds barred.
To the death, baby.
Somebody's going to get themselves killed.
I've got a nomination.
Why do they do it?
To show their masculinity and courage.
To prove their virility.
They've got to be stupid.
I've got another nomination for that.
Do you know something?
He would be one of the greatest bull-fighters of our time.
He could go down in a ring without a sword
and talk it to death.
Oh, for heaven's sake!
Ole! Ole! Stop it!
'If I have one magnificent quality,
'which I certainly have, it's my modesty.
'And though I say it myself, how could any girl resist
'when you're alone on a boat with the sea, the sun, champagne
'and the happy, happy thought that a certain American gentleman
'is miles away on shore?'
'It stands to reason, any good, clean-living American boy
'can outsmart any decadent English aristocrat.
'You wanna be alone with a girl?
'You find a lonely mountain, so steep even the goats don't use it.
'Then what do you do? Then you climb to the top.
'Then what do you think you see?'
First we'll go to this private beach I know and have a picnic.
Then later tonight I'm going to take you to the top of a mountain.
There's a place I know that's fabulous.
Red wine, candle light,
and the greatest flamenco guitarist this side of Madrid.
Why, Danny? "Why Danny" what?
You and Brett trying so hard to make me feel wanted, important.
Well, you're a nice-looking girl. No, no, I'm rather new at this game.
You see, Danny, I've been from one exclusive girls' school to another.
Look, forget that "poor little rich girl" routine.
And I'll tell you something else... I don't care if you believe me.
The fact is that I've been suffering from a bad case of over protection.
You see, Danny, I didn't just plain grow up.
Oh, no. No, I was moulded
into what someone else thought my image should be.
I see. Moulded, huh?
Well, whoever did the moulding didn't do a bad job.
Oh, you really think I'm attractive?
You're a knockout but I don't have to tell you that.
Yeah. I wish I didn't know John hatton wanted you to say that.
You're the most suspicious nice English girl I ever met.
You think I don't know why you and Brett are throwing yourselves at me?
Tell me why again, I've forgotten.
He put you up to this whirlwind courtship, didn't he? Who's he?
John hatton. Oh, I see, John hatton.
Yeah. Well, it's great, Danny, it's great, just don't expect it to work.
I'm crazy about you. I'm nuts about you.
Lovers' quarrel?
Here he is. The English lord. What are you doing here?
Waiting for you to leave. Oh, really.
Well, I'm leaving, I'm leaving. Hasta la vista.
Hasta la never.
Do you have any special plans for today?
Good, then we'll pop into my car, go down to the river
to a nice shaded, secluded little spot
where we'll be entirely alone.
Then afterwards we'll pop back into the car and go to the beach.
There's a little bodega with...
..Candles and the greatest flamenco guitarist this side of Madrid.
You've been there.
I'm sorry. I suppose I'm a little suspicious of everyone's motives.
In that case we'll move out of the sun
and I'll buy you a forgiving drink.
Well, well, if it isn't buffalo bill coady.
Not while I'm eating. You're early.
They don't take the garbage out for two hours. Very funny (!)
Still in the banking business. I have a few investments going.
Cheese? No, thank you, save it for the mouse you've got baited here.
Here? Oh, yes, here. I'm a guest in this hotel.
You're also bankrolling a cheapskate called Carl foster. Over there.
Sorry. I don't know the man.
See you around, mr wilde. Call it off, coady,
or I'll rub you out with spot remover.
Darling, I've been looking for you. Sorry, I thought you were busy.
Too bad you can't join us. Thanks, but we have an appointment.
Hm? The lawyer, my darling.
Oh, yes, the lawyer. Sorry, I just forgot.
We're due there in half an hour. I'm sure you don't mind.
If that's what shelley wants. Oh, it is, it is.
Isn't it, shelley? Yes, yes, of course.
Well, er... sorry, Brett. Perhaps another time.
Hasta la vista.
A lawyer? She said nothing to me.
Could she be signing over any money to him?
Not without my counter signature. I approve any significant payment.
Whatever it is, he's putting on the pressure.
I've got to know what he's planning. I've got to know.
Psst.
Whispers: Now what?
Whispers: Do whatever I do.
Innocent whistle
both whistle
er...
Good evening.
He's gone.
Now, I've seen this done a million times in the movies.
My cut.
It's not thick enough.
Give me a poppy pin. What's that?
Hairpin.
Thanks. Watch.
What happened?
It fell through the other side.
Fork.
Are you going to eat your way through?
Just give me a fork.
You and your jokes!
Oh, what do you know?
Listen, I've got an idea. What?
Why don't we hire a young burglar and give him his first chance?
What are you talking about?
Hiring a burglar!
This place is easy, easier than fort Knox.
Spencer Tracy once took a pipe cleaner,
an ordinary pipe cleaner.
And by inserting it in the keyhole,
delicately moving it about in intricate positions,
you know, I could become a gentlemen cracksmith with this.
He opened it.
Well, it doesn't seem...
Your lordship?
No need to kneel. I'm a Democratic lord.
Now, how did you do that?
I went through those windows, along the balcony and through...
Whispers: Now, what are you doing out there? Whispers: Coming in.
I don't know what happened.
You're sure he's out with shelley? He's gone for hours.
Where do we start? Foster's mr obvious
so we got to the most obvious place.
Under the bed. No. Follow the master.
See that chest of drawers? It's always the top one on the right.
Oh, sure. Under the socks.
I'm so smart I can't handle it!
Beginner's luck.
On second thoughts, you should fold that up and let me put it back.
Why? Cos there's a guy standing at the door with a gun aimed at us.
That may be one of the best reasons I've ever heard. Put it away.
Breaking and entering. I could shoot you down right now.
In self-defence, of course.
He couldn't to through with it. No.
Why should I? Why should he? He's got it made.
Especially with the document shelley signed. Oh, yeah?
With that he becomes her legal advisor on John hatton's retirement,
voluntary resignation
or demise. He could suddenly demise down dead.
He's stopped shaking his head. Shall we? Yeah, let's go.
What do you want to do tonight? There is was a new discotheque...
There was no need for you to go through all this.
You were going to just tell us, give us the angles?
Yes, like reporting a fire to an arsonist.
You can't stop me now. He still has to get rid of hatton.
Murder. Come on! Not foster, he hasn't got the belly for it.
He's a pussy cat. You mean you could rent space on his yellow streak?
This is the big one, gentlemen. $30m.
One I've waited for all my life.
Nothing's going to stop me now, including you.
It sounds as though he's got the belly for it after all.
I'm warning you. Keep out of my way.
I'm in this up to the neck and if you don't think I'd kill for $30m...
Try me.
Shelley, isn't it time you faced it? You know what foster wants from you.
I don't want to talk about it. Fine.
I know you mean well but why don't you see things the way they are.
You say Carl foster is after my money.
That could be true of every man in my life. How am I to know?
But some time I've just got to take the chance.
Yes, but not with a man like him.
Your pride's caught up in this. Why don't you take some advice?
Advice?! I don't need advice.
I'm a big girl now. With a big fortune.
Look, all my life I've put up with counsellors, advisors.
There comes a point when I've got to start to make my own mistakes.
I'm 26. That's time enough.
Why not accept you got off to a bad start?
That's not true. I've known Carl foster for some time.
He's never asked for a penny. He's paid his way and mine as well.
What sort of con trick is that? The usual sort.
Look, he said it out loud. This is the big one for him.
Admit it, he pushed you into signing that document?
He did not push me. I wanted to sign it.
Anyway, it simply states that he'll become my financial administrator
should anything happen to John. And it just might.
Are you suggesting he'd kill John? Would you like to take the chance?
It's a hot dog. Oh, I know better, it's a sausage and...
Excuse me.
I want to show you something. What? I want to show you something.
Why? Don't make a scene. Come on.
Let go of me.
Well, I don't pretend to know what's happened
but it needn't be anything to do with Carl foster.
It... it could be a burglary, something like that.
Come on, you could think of a hundred ways not to involve foster,
but you'd still be kidding yourself.
What can we do? Come on.
You know what, foster, you're a terrible operator.
Good conmen don't sweat when they're worried. Why should I be?
Cos I'm running out of time. Things are working out fine, coady.
I've got her set up. Move in for the kill.
A few more days and... Now.
Now, foster. What's the hurry?
24 hours.
Or I move in on you.
Sure, coady. You'll be sure.
And try not to sweat, foster. It betrays you.
Now, he's not in the hotel and his car's still on the lot.
I don't know where he's... Here comes your armoratta now.
I'm sorry I'm late, something came up.
It's all right. Not really, I'll be busy for another couple of hours.
We were having dinner. I know. I know.
But, look, I'll be back by eleven
and if you get ravenous I'm sure mr wilde will look after you.
Any time. I'm so sorry, sweetheart.
You do understand, don't you?
Bye. I'll be as quick as I can.
Er, Carl, you haven't by any chance seen John hatton, have you?
Hatton. No, was he looking for me?
No. No, it's all right, it doesn't matter.
Well, I think er... I think we better go.
I think I saw lights on the side road back there.
I'll turn around.
Flamenco guitar
That was Carl. Yeah, where's Brett?
I tried to hold out but he forced me to sign. There was no choice.
Buenas tardes.
Wait here.
You come to the village of poor people and steal our guest?!
You know, senor, the law permits us to cut off the hand of a thief?
And we don't give out prizes of kidnapping! I'm taking him away.
No, senor. We are people of great honour.
We have received money for his lodging.
Well then, how much do you need to unlodge him?
Don't offer me money, senor, you would insult me.
If a man wants something badly enough, he fights for it.
Marquess of queensbury or catch as catch can?
If you win, you walk away with your friend.
If you lose, you don't walk.
Keep back, I think it's cabaret time.
Who wins? You, senor.
Nice and slow.
I am a very bad loser.
Not only am I a bad loser, I am a liar and a cheat.
You will both stay here.
By the way, I'm a bad loser too.
All right, let's hear the worst.
Well, he had the document all prepared. My official resignation.
It stated I am no longer shelley's financial adviser. Signed.
That, together with the paper you signed, wraps it up.
He now controls the estate.
He does nice work. Expensive, but nice.
Yes, but he still can't cash cheques without shelley's countersignature.
And he can't force me to do that.
Whatever else he can do, he can't force me to do that. For you.
Without his signature, the estate can't function.
No trading or investments, it could cost millions.
Is that from foster? Yes.
I imagine he is willing to return the documents for a consideration.
$100,000. Never. I won't allow it.
We have no choice. We have the law.
Documents signed under coercion, the threat of physical violence.
The courts would invalidate them on sight.
Yes, but getting in the courts could take a long time.
You think I care? Paying out money
to some fortune hunter, giving him the satisfaction he's won. Oh, no.
I want you to pay him, John. What? Pay him the money.
Why, shelley? Because I don't want my stupidity
spread all over the newspapers.
Oh, please, John, pay him. No, shelley.
I'll never agree to pay that man one single penny.
Shelley, do it his way. It will make a lot of noise in the newspapers
for a couple of days and then it'll be yesterday's news
people just don't remember. I'll remember.
Come on. No, I'll find that money somehow.
It may take time, but I'll find it. Phone rings
you have to pay for your mistakes, don't you?
Hello? It's foster.
Yes. Yes, I got your note.
You'll agree it's a small price to pay.
You know, there were times I saw you as a beautiful, attractive woman
and not just a crock of gold.
I mustn't get sentimental. Now to business.
I can't, it's impossible.
Of course you can, you'll do it.
And you'll bring it yourself and you'll be alone. Understand?
I can't. It's impossible. What?
He won't wait. He wants the money by noon tomorrow.
You play a good game of poker, senor.
Thank you. Gambling is a family tradition.
As a matter of fact, my great-great uncle, viscount eckersley,
mother's side of the family, that is, once made what is reputed to be
the world's largest wager on a hand of cards.
Really? He staked the entire family land and estates.
That's six noble houses, ten million acres, 100,000 guineas,
all on one turn of the cards.
Fantastic. What happened?
Oh, he lost.
I would have killed myself. He did. Who's opening?
Knock on door
Danny! Sh!
You should have dressed. What?
Listen, come here. You know, about this money that you need.
It's funny, but I just had some lying around in my bag
and I thought maybe you could use a little.
Danny, I...
It's just a little amount of money I had. Use it if you need it.
I don't know what to say. Nothing to say, just...
A full. Aces on tens.
You're sure you wouldn't care for a few more hands?
Oh, thank you, no.
You appear to have better fortune than your illustrious ancestor.
Well, I've always believed that
it's better to be a bad winner than a good loser.
Gentlemen, that appears to be that.
Senor, even as a loser,
I consider it a privilege to have played with you.
Thank you. There's just one other thing.
My original stake money - you wouldn't mind if I took it back?
You see, unlike this stuff, this is real.
Get after him! Go on, get after him, quickly!
Good night. Night, Danny. Listen, take care of yourself.
I still don't know how to thank you. Nothing to thank me for.
Oh, you know, don't tell Brett about the money. No, of course.
See you in the morning? Yeah. Don't forget. Yeah. Don't change.
Knock at door
Look what I found. Brett!
I thought you might find a use for it.
Well, I... Brett, I simply don't know what to say!
Well, don't say anything.
Well, do you mind if I kiss you? I'd be most hurt if you didn't.
How can I ever thank you?
Oh, we'll think of a way.
By the way, you won't say anything to Danny, will you?
Oh, I wouldn't. Believe me, I wouldn't.
Right here. Don't stop, keep going.
Why don't you say goodbye? Why don't you just push your trolley along
and share it with some glandular type that usually goes for you?
Brett, do shelley a favour. Save her the embarrassment
of having to tell you she's met a real man?
Gentlemen, I think I can help. What is it?
Miss masterton, she checked out of the hotel one hour ago.
Thank you. You know...
Checked out? Yes, she and mr hatton.
Thank you.
So, you... loaned shelley the money, hm?
Are you kidding? You think I'd pull a trick like that?
You thought it might give you an edge, right? Right.
It was a rotten, sneaky thing to do.
Well, what do you expect from a rotten sneak?
Anyway, don't forget our bet... To the death.
Daniel, I cannot tell you how disappointed I am in us.
Us? Wait a minute. You didn't give her...
100,000 big ones.
That's the most conniving, dirty... Wait a minute.
She only needed 100 grand, which I gave her. And I gave her.
Brett... Don't say it.
Let's toast to three of the neatest artists in the business.
$200,000!
Two? You doubled it! Yeah, and I wasn't even trying.
Each of them handed over,
and both of them then made me swear that I wouldn't tell the other one.
Naturally, I agreed. That's absolutely priceless.
You're a genius! Yes, I rather think I am.
I think that calls for a celebration.
Here, this might interest you. Your namesake got married last week.
Big society wedding.
"Miss shelley masterton and mr Thomas Reid-Watson.
Hmm. Not bad looking. I wouldn't say she's quite in my class, though.
You played the part brilliantly. Oh, thank you.
Where's Johnny? He's putting the bags in the car.
Oh. Pity we have to rush off. I was just beginning to like it here.
Hmm. The climate is going to get very unhealthy, very fast.
There's something I didn't mention to you and Johnny. Like what?
Like where I got the money to finance the whole operation.
You mean the way you set up the banker?
When you showed him the masterton estate
with me acting like that great big house was mine,
what did you offer him? 50% of the take.
Hmm, smooth operator. Well?
He thinks you're the real shelley masterton.
What does that matter?
The banker is a man named coady and you don't cheat on coady.
You must be out of your mind!
That's why we're getting out fast and travelling far.
That'll be Johnny. You'd better get ready.
Suddenly, I've got wings on my heels. I'll get my things.
Door opens
take a look in the case, Johnny. It'll make your heart sing.
I'll do that, foster.
Well, hi. Nice surprise.
Surprised? You must have been expecting a visit from me sometime.
Of course, naturally.
As a matter of fact, I was just about to put a call through to you.
Of course you were, but I thought I'd come anyway,
just to check on my investment.
You see, I've had people watching you down here.
I don't like what I've heard.
Well, look - I'll tell you the truth, coady.
That would be nice... and unusual.
You see, I mean... well, kidnapping is a little out of my territory.
Rather late to admit that, isn't it?
Well, maybe, but... I've cleaned up anyway.
A couple of playboys... An American and an englishman.
That's what I hear...
You were pulling some kind of con trick on them.
While all the time, you had shelley masterton and her $30m
in the palm of your hand.
All right, so I got chicken, but 200,000 isn't bad, coady.
And half of it's yours. That's big of you.
You're not going to buy your way out of anything with this, foster.
The kidnap is still on. I want shelley masterton.
Then I can help you. She's here. She's upstairs right now. Check.
Look, you can handle the whole thing from now on.
I mean, I'll bow out. You can collect the whole take.
Yes, you're certainly gonna...
You've got to be kidding. You're putting me on.
Well, it was the only sensible thing to do.
The next time you try to convince me you're a two-timing double-cross,
I'll believe it and forgive you everything.
Well, Daniel, I appreciate that.
After all, I couldn't part with real cash.
I had to get myself a bundle of funny money.
Counterfeit - the same stuff I had. Where did you get yours?
From the counterfeit Spanish card-playing count.
Oh! You know, for a peer of the realm,
you strike me as a devious gent.
Daniel, in this Democratic age,
how else can we keep our heads above water?
You know, I agree with you.
Oh, I don't believe what I believe.
I imagine you didn't expect to see me again.
Would you like to practise our karate homework?
I take everything above the belt.
Look, you have every right. Do anything you want to me.
It's shelley, or at least the girl you know as shelley.
Where is she now... Istanbul, South America?
She's in trouble. Desperate trouble.
The way I see it, you're the only ones I can come to for help.
I couldn't care what happens to foster,
the only thing that matters is I've got you.
But I'm not... a note has been sent to your home in england.
If there's anyone there who cares for you,
I imagine they'll be quick to react. And if they don't?
Either way, miss masterton,
either way, your future is rather limited.
You know now.
So, you see, I really could not let you leave here alive.
Now I know you paid us off with counterfeit money,
I don't feel so bad about asking you for help.
Well, you're gonna feel bad. We'll find new ways to make you feel bad.
I'll drink to that.
If only I had something to drink with.
You might as well know, hatton, that the only reason we're in on this
is my friend's misplaced sense of chivalry.
Apart from the fact that shelley's rather attractive.
For a confidence trickster, that is.
What's her real name?
Gladys Smith.
Doesn't sound too bad.
By the way, how many men does coady have with him?
Well, three that I know of,
but I think there might be a couple or more round the back.
Tyres screech
how many? Altogether? Yeah. Six at the most.
Six? Six. With guns? Sure to.
Well, there are three of us.
I'll not be much help if it comes to a rough house.
I have this heart condition. Oh, I'm just developing one myself.
Well, we could use a little help, I'll tell you.
As always, you explain the situation with impeccable understatement.
Thanks.
Sheep bleat
are you thinking what I'm thinking?
A perfect choice.
Get her down here.
Miss masterton? The one we thought was miss masterton.
Twig snaps
Here, finish trussing him. Daniel may need help.
My great pleasure.
Come on. Eat hearty, it's good for you.
Daniel, that was very nice. I like those short punches.
It is nice.
Wasn't quite short enough. You've got to make it tense.
He gags
laughs
how many is that, three?
Four, sort of.
It evens up the odd somewhat.
I can't thank you enough for your help.
You English have a most agreeable way to make an honest peseta.
Hay, English?
You are a good man with a crook.
Oh, well, it takes one to no one.
I did tell you - it's not my fault if you didn't believe me.
You and foster planned this together.
You just wouldn't listen.
I don't like to lose money and I don't like to be made a fool.
You have done both those things. Bang
Hello, Gladys. Might look a little happier to see us
after all we've been through. What about coady? Oh, let him go.
Coughing well, ray. I thought you went home.
I am a good Shepherd, senor,
and a good Shepherd never turns his back on a stray lamb.
Well, you're my kind of Shepherd, believe me. Ta-ta.
Farewell. You will forgive us if we rush? We have some champagne on ice.
That's a lot of sheep.
Look, couldn't you both stay on a little longer?
Well, if we wanted to, we would.
But I'm afraid London calls for me and the Bronx for him.
Well... thank you both. Goodbye. Our pleasure.
Shelley, Gladys, or whatever you're gonna call yourself, be careful.
I'm afraid Christian dior fell down on prison uniforms this year.
Well, you're both looking at a reformed woman.
Glad to hear it. Hasta luega. Ta-ta. Bye-bye.
Have you ever seen an oil rig working? No?
Oh, so you're in oil? Yeah. How terribly interesting.
Quite a coincidence, actually.
Daddy's in the shipping business. Tankers, mostly.
If you're a pretty girl, you can't lose them all.
A thought. I'll bet.
Me too. Why don't we just... Forget it.
My very thought, old man. Vamos.
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