Are stake-outs always this boring?
If you're looking for excitement,
get out of this business and open a dress shop.
If you're in trouble, just yell.
And I'll come with the fuzz.
Thank you.
Not yet.
There is a candle. Light it.
I'm sorry I'm late.
Welcome. Welcome!
I'm glad I wasn't early.
What is 15 minutes late? I have waited six months to meet you.
Now, may I know your name?
Sinclair.
Brett sinclair. There.
Lord sinclair?
Excellent. I must tell you
that we have been most impressed
by the information you supplied in the past.
Thank you. You'll be even more impressed
when you see what I have for you now.
The most complete dossier ever of the NATO defence systems.
You have it with you? Well, not exactly.
But I can get my hands on it when we've agreed terms.
The terms have been agreed.
£100,000 is our price.
Oh, that's not nearly enough.
I think you had better reconsider.
Well, I think you'll reconsider
when you cast your eyes over them and double the amount.
Perhaps. But I think you will find us very reasonable people.
We are not going to fall out over something as unimportant as money.
Sinclair. He won't be alone.
Get clear. Thank you.
Now what trouble did you get into?
Is he bad? He dead.
Danny, I'm off.
Lord sinclair. Well, now we know.
You're late. Where have you been?
I had to drop Danny seven miles from this hotel. Why?
It's all part of his new regime. I'll tell you about it later.
Meanwhile you have some explaining to do. You did it to me again.
"Go and meet a man", you said.
"Tell him you have some documents to sell. There's no danger."
Trouble? There were more bullets flying last night
than world war ii. Well, better tell me about it.
Oh, I have a better idea. You tell me about it.
Well, it's fairly straightforward.
Someone in British intelligence has turned traitor.
So far he's managed to keep his or her identity a secret.
Not only from us but from his buyer.
Well, that takes a certain amount of talent, I imagine.
A great deal of talent. Never doubt it.
Up to the moment the stuff he's sold has been important but not vital.
Now we are convinced that he's been able to get copies of NATO documents
that big? Yes.
All right. But surely our government has a counter espionage service
able to handle this? Why pick on me?
Because you happen to be here.
And because we need an outsider.
You see, the traitor is on the inside of the department
and he's been able to get wind of every trap we've ever set.
A day or so ago we had our first bit of luck.
We intercepted a message that was to arrange a rendezvous at the farm
you went to last night.
Our operator passed the message on but changed one thing.
The date. Instead of the real spy you showed up.
So now the enemy are convinced that I'm the traitor?
Exactly. And now they'll concentrate on you.
And when the real spy shows up to keep his rendezvous tonight
we'll be able to nab him.
Brilliant. Yes, I thought so.
Well, are you going to open that door or shall we talk out here?
There is one tiny little thing that's gone wrong.
I mean, nothing very important.
Tell me the worst. Well, as our security has to be top level
we've not let any of our local people on our plan.
Which means?
Well, it means they're following up their own leads.
Naturally we can't do anything to discourage them
without someone smelling a rat.
That was a British agent who was killed last night
doing what he thought was his duty.
Unfortunately... Aha...
Here it comes. Well, he had an assistant with him
who identified you.
Well, isn't that nice (?)
I mean, it's lovely. Not only the enemy think I'm a traitor
so do the British.
Well, to put it in a nutshell...
Yes.
Hi.
Just doing my morning constitutional.
I do seven miles every day.
Got another 45 yards to go. What's all this about?
Oh, this morning he stood on his weighing machine
and it went, ouch, and it doesn't even talk.
It's got nothing to do with my weight.
I do it for conditioning. To stay in shape, know what I mean?
Daniel, please sit down. Don't be nervous. Time's up anyway.
How... going back to my problem...
Daniel, would you please run? Yeah, right.
How long am I going to be the man in the middle?
Only until tonight, until we catch the spy.
We're convinced he's on his way to Rome.
♪ A life on the ocean wave
♪ ta ta diddle De Dee
♪ da da dum pum pum pum... ♪
Speaks own language
ah. Quite agree with you, whatever you mean.
Ah...
Thank you very much for the lift.
Scoli, signore. Scoli, what's that?
Dinaro, dinaro, dinaro.
I've a horrible feeling that you mean money.
Oh, yes. Well, of course.
Splendid.
There you are. You're very lucky, that's the smallest I've got.
English currency. Worth mucho. Much. Oh, mucho? Grazie, grazie, milord.
Not at all. Regards to the wife, bye.
Charming chaps, these foreigners.
Filthy foreigners.
Good.
Hello. You're English, aren't you?
I say, that's jolly clever of you.
How did you know? I didn't say a word.
Just a wild guess. Jump in, old boy. Oh, thanks frightfully.
My name's Archie sinclair-beauchamp. What's yours? David price.
One of the high prices?!
Car break down? Mm? Oh, yes, yes.
Both back tyres burst at the same time.
You get the worst mechanic out here. You can't trust these chaps.
Where are you going? Rome.
Really? So am I. Good, good.
Hotel cavalieri.
Oh, that's a coincidence. I'm booked in there, too.
Well, I'll be damned. You must have dinner with me tonight.
That's very nice of you, thank you. Not at all.
Are you on holiday out here? No, no, not exactly.
I'm a journalist. I'm following up an interesting story. Really?
Well, I'll see you in London. Thanks for all your help.
Have a safe flight. There's just one thing.
What exactly am I meant to do? Nothing, just stay out of trouble.
Of course I must admit that whilst our people think you're a traitor
there's just the vaguest possibility that they might try to kill you.
Very unlikely of course. Oh, good (!)
Perhaps it's only fair to warn you that the other people see in you
a very valuable property, they might try something, too.
But I don't expect it. He's such a comfort, isn't he?
It's only for a little while, so... Play it as it comes. Cheerio.
Cheer... play it as it comes, he says.
Come on, cheer up. What can happen?
I could get killed, that's what. Not in a hotel lobby.
And me as your bodyguard. You're dramatising.
Besides, I'm gonna be around you every second of the time now.
That is a depressing thought. Come on, I'll buy you a drink.
I will never understand how we always manage to let the...
Erm... bodyguard?
I was watching. She looked suspicious.
What do you think they're gonna do? Kidnap you in the hotel lobby?
Yes, he's in the lobby. Get over here fast.
It's dangerous. But we have to pick him up before they can.
We must pick him up before the British.
Once they get him inside their embassy
there's nothing more we can do. You want me to contact him?
No.
No, I shall handle things from now on.
Think of the prestige. The propaganda value.
An English aristocrat betrays country secrets.
Lord sinclair is worth double his weight in gold to us.
We must not lose him.
A word for ceases to live?
Died, expired, murdered, slaughtered, strangled.
Strangulated, killed, passed on.
Not only do the words come trippingly, but naturally today.
I don't want you to worry about anything.
I tell you my secretary made these reservations weeks ago.
They've poisoned you! What?
What is it? That voice. What does it look like?
Voice? Oh. Stupid.
Looks like an englishman is supposed to look like in the movies.
That's Archie. That's who?
Archibald sinclair-beauchamp.
A not distant enough cousin. Don't let him see me.
Brett old boy... Oh, price, come here.
Brett, what an absolutely smashing surprise to see you here.
Archie, what on earth are you doing here?
I've got the yacht down at ostia. Yacht? What yacht?
The yacht. You know, it's a complete overhaul. The barnacles.
Caribbean barnacles, the worst type, you know.
Got to do something about them.
Oh, you're Danny wilde, aren't you? Oil's your game, isn't it?
I might be able to put something your way.
May I introduce a friend of mine? David price.
I gave him a lift on the way down. Mr price.
We must have a drink to celebrate the family reunion.
You must excuse me, but I must check in.
Must you really? See you later.
Now, look chaps, come on. You must have a drink. Do sit down.
After all blood is thicker than water.
Waiter, let us have a bottle of champagne, will you?
You're a colonial chap from america? Yes, I am.
I'm rather find of Americans. I met one in New York.
Yes, I come from New York myself. How extraordinary.
Isn't that unfortunate? Something came up. I have to go to my room.
Well, it's been a pleasure meeting you.
I say do sit down. I want to tell you about a secret oil strike
that I've just heard about.
Well... the note says that a package has been delivered to my room.
You're disappointed?
Not at all. The gift wrapping is superb.
May I offer you a drink? No, thank you.
I'm here on business.
Oh? May I be so naive as to enquire what your line is?
Work for British intelligence.
Oh. Isn't that a pity?
I'd rather hoped you were a gift from the Italian tourist board.
I'll have to ask you to come along with us. Us?
The game, as they say, is up, lord sinclair.
I do hope you'll cooperate and not cause any trouble.
Well, could I ask you to offer me some proof that you are British?
Show him our proof.
Convinced? Totally.
Would you hold that for me, please?
I hope you make a point of not fighting girls.
Not when they're carrying guns.
Stand absolutely still. This won't hurt.
Oh, good. If there's anything I can't stand it's suffering
when it includes pain.
However, there are a few things I think you should know...
Like it?
I'm going to see if I can find Brett, how see you later, Archie.
Fine. One second? Yes?
Rather embarrassing,
but I checked in, haven't had time to cash my traveller's cheques.
Would you mind getting the champagne?
Of course. Charming. Ha-ha. There we are.
Charge that to lord sinclair's account, will you?
By the way, take the rest of that up to my room, will you?
He whistles
hello. Hello.
What floor, Archie? Same as you.
Well, I'm gonna see Brett.
I say, what a remarkable coincidence. So am I.
Have you known him for a long time? I have, yes.
Oh... excuse me.
Can't you use the service lift?
Well, it's been wonderful meeting you, Archie.
Knocks your lordship.
Brett?
Brett...
Well, he's not in that. He's probably in that. Come on.
Come on, we'll use the stairs.
I can't use stairs.
Why not? I've got a bad arm.
Bad arm?
Back the truck up to the loading bay.
Don't you think you're being a weeny bit too impetuous?
Impetuous? He's your cousin.
I thought you said blood is thicker than water?
I know but this is a bit too thick. He's only a third cousin.
Gunshot
all right. Now what are you doing?
Let's talk to the manager... I'm going in there.
And I want you to stay back here. Stay here? Good idea.
When I yell, I want you to grab a basket. What?
Just a...
Tally-ho!
I must warn you that in assisting
that man you're aiding a known traitor.
What man? There's no man in here.
Then he must have gone to the other side.
The embassy's technically foreign soil.
Nobody's allowed on the premises.
Not the government, the police. No-one.
Well, I wasn't planning to knock on their door.
Knock on door come in.
Hello, chaps. Ready?
Excuse me but where do you think you're gonna go dressed like that?
I don't know. You didn't say. You said slip into something sporty.
For action. Don't you like it? I like it very much
but we're trying to break into an embassy, climbing over walls.
Well, I don't know how to break this to you
and don't think I'm trying to get out of it
but I've got a bad leg.
Also a pathological fear of anything even remotely connected
with physical violence.
What I'm trying to say is that I'm just a teeny weeny cowardly.
Well, I got that. But you've got to go along anyway.
Come on, Archie.
Let's go. If you get caught you're on your own.
Nobody can do anything about it. Brett's life's in danger.
Those guys want those papers
and Brett can't tell them he doesn't have them.
They'll torture him. Whips, fire.
Matches. Under the fingernails.
Some more wine? Why not?
Tell me, senka, what exactly do you do in the embassy?
I am secretary for cultural affairs.
Oh, that's nice.
There's nothing I like more than a bit of... culture.
I am so glad.
I am sure that through the arts
east and west can come closer together.
That's what I say. Do you have to go?
Go? To collect the documents from their hiding place?
Oh, no. Let's not worry about those for the moment.
I just don't want you to leave.
I have an idea. I rather thought you would.
You tell me where they are and I'll have someone fetch them for you.
But comrade krilev and I have...
Not come to any arrangement.
But you can be sure he will be generous.
And so will I. Where are they?
Well, it seems to have slipped my mind at the moment.
Tell you what, why don't you go on working on me, hmm?
Come on, Archie, easy.
Ooh. Splashing
what a ruddy silly place to put a fountain!
Archie, what are you doing?
What are you doing there?
What do you mean?
A window.
Oh, I say, good thinking.
I'll go back to the hotel and get a ladder.
Come here, you are not going anywhere.
Stay where you are. Huh?
You're going up there.
What, up there? I can't get up there!
Right, now put your leg here. Come on, Archie.
That's right. Now go get 'em, baby.
Ow! Come on. That's it.
Did you say that window?
Hey, Archie. Come on. Drop.
Drop? I'd break a leg.
Or something. Come on.
Come on.
Come on, hurry up, Archie. Get up.
Come on.
Bonjourno. Put them in the store room. This way.
Prego. Go. Si.
Si.
You check the ground floor, I'll check the upstairs.
Here, what...?
What are you doing here? Well, I...
Sshh. Now follow me.
And they always told me the English were so cold.
Good evening, Daniel. Good evening.
We've been climbing over walls, you know, trying to rescue you.
Up ropes, down ladders, he and I.
We thought you were in some terrible torture.
I appreciate that, Daniel. It's been hell (!)
I... I don't think I could have held out much longer.
Well, don't just lie there, get and say good night, let's go.
Well, if it's all the same to you, Daniel,
could you come back and rescue me in an hour?
We're rescuing you now or we won't rescue now.
Say goodnight to mata hari so we can go.
Yells
sshh. Get the cord from the curtain.
Tie her up, Archie. Tie her up?
But... she's a lady.
Oh, you figured that out for yourself, did you?
Will you tie her up? Ow!
I cannot understand why sinclair is so reluctant.
He was prepared to deal with you before.
Yes.
Go!
Couldn't we take her with us? I say, what a jolly good idea.
I don't think we could cos number one, she can't run that way.
Alarm bell
Archie!
Archie, come on.
There's some more coming that way!
The window!
Argh!
Come on! Come on, Archie. Come on.
But we're one floor up. Archie, don't argue, come on.
You go, let me see you do it.
Come on, Archie. Jump. Come on.
Archie, will you jump?! Sorry.
Come on, Archie. Let's go.
Well done, Archie. Next year the olympic team.
I can't climb up there. Gunshot
Get around to the front. Get the guards!
It's too late. We won't get them now.
What is it? It's gone rather cold.
Like the first chill of a siberian winter.
It's getting late.
I don't think this guy is gonna show myself.
There's no reason why he shouldn't.
The rendezvous was fixed for tonight.
He doesn't know the date was changed.
Someone could have wised him up.
I thought this Kay was supposed to be here by this time?
Yes. And I can think of only one good reason why she hasn't shown.
Because she's the spy?
She's not the spy. It's possible.
I'm telling you, she's not the spy. It's possible.
I guess it's possible she could be the spy.
No, it's not possible. It's not possible?
I'm gonna look out the window.
It's not possible...
Twig breaks
I heard it too.
I got him.
Oh... ooh.
Archie. Archie.
What did you jump on me like that for?
Not very sporting of you.
Get up. Right now, Archie.
What are you doing here?
What are you looking at me like that for?
I'm not your spy if that's what you think. It crossed my mind.
Don't be so ruddy silly. How did you know about this place?
I was in a bar and I met this girl, Kay hunter.
She told me where you were and asked me to come up here. Why?
Why? To say she was following another lead and couldn't come.
I certainly wouldn't have come if I'd known I'd get this reception.
We're sorry, Archie, but we expected someone else. Oh.
Footsteps
now stay down.
See anything? Sshh.
I was only asking. Shut up.
Bottle rattles
did I give the game away?
Whispers: You go that way, I'll go this way.
Hello... price!
How nice to see you again. Do forgive the gun, it's yours.
I hope you don't mind. I borrowed it out of your glove compartment.
Make yourself comfortable. My friends won't be long.
Hoots horn
well, nice going, Archie.
I didn't see any point in haring around in the woods.
I knew this chap would have to come back to his car.
Why didn't you think of that?
Well, his side of the family were always the brainy ones.
I... I trust that our intelligence people
were duly grateful when you turned price in?
They were pleased and delighted.
They said they thought it was a jolly good show.
Any mention of a reward?
Nothing was said. Oh...
How's this...? Yes... one second...
Isn't Kay supposed to be here?
What's the meaning of this? I'm a British citizen.
I demand to see my consul. Spare us the histrionics.
You're Kay hunter, a British agent.
But more than that, you're all that stands between me and a cold winter.
Cold winter? A siberian joke.
Get the number. What is all this about?
I want you to talk to somebody. To say what?
Oh, anything you like. The weather. Where you've been on your holidays.
A moment please.
Take it.
Hello. Kay?
Where are you? We're waiting to start the celebrations.
Brett, i'm... Hello. This is krilev.
Miss hunter is a guest at our embassy.
No, no, no. Please, don't interrupt. I have a proposition.
Yes.
Yes, I understand, but...
Is all that quite clear? Don't listen to him...
I'm sorry. Is all that quite clear?
Good. Then I shall give you until morning to make the arrangements.
I'll call you.
Goodnight, lord sinclair.
What is it?
Oh, they have Kay. They're making nasty noises
about what they'll do unless we agree to their terms.
What are they planning to do?
They want a straight trade. They get price, we get Kay.
Well, that's simple. She's much more valuable than price.
Much prettier, too. Archie.
Price is on his way to London.
The authorities don't want him around. Well, it's worth a bash.
I can tell you the answer now. It's the risk that all agents take.
If they get into trouble, they're on their own.
We have until morning.
And there's absolutely nothing we can do about it.
Could I have a glass?
You know this place?
Very isolated. Nobody lives there now.
Perfect. Right, you'd better get started.
Have your cars and men standing by.
Daniel, that thing's going to ring any minute now.
We have to come up with an answer. Let's go over the facts again.
These guys want to do business with us, right? Right.
So they don't know that price is out of the country. Right.
He's just a name to them right? Right.
They don't know anything about him, what he looks like, anything.
So all we have to do is produce somebody.
We say it's price and they let Kay free, right? Right.
The only problem is that somebody.
They're expecting an englishman so it can't be you.
They know me so that rules me out. Where do we find anyone stupid...
..Enough to be exchanged?
Morning, chaps. Morning.
Does that answer your questions?
Any new bright ideas?
It's funny you should say that. Phone rings
tell him, will you?
Aren't you going to answer that?
Never send to know for whom the bell tolls.
It tolls for thee.
Yes? Speaking.
Yes, I think you can safely say we have a deal.
This road Peters out when it gets to the village,
that's the only way in or out, you know?
We picked a good spot.
Look, as I see it, and I don't know if I've got it straight,
these foreign chaps won't give you Kay
until you give in return, this chap they think is the spy.
Is that right?
You make the swap and let them leave the village first, ok?
By which time you will have the roadblock set.
The moment they stop, wham!
And I come up from the rear and, er...
Right, and in the meantime,
in the confusion, I grab him and we take off through the woods. Right?
Right.
It can't be you.
And it can't be you.
So, it must be...
I do believe he's got it!
Both: He's got it, he's got it.
Do you understand what you have to do?
Ok. This is it.
Now, if it doesn't work out, don't feel too bad.
You'll always have some caviar and vodka wherever you go.
Look, Brett, you can't do this to me.
Family loyalty and all that sort of rot.
Come on, Archie. Your whole life has been spent conning the world.
This is probably the greatest challenge of your career.
And remember one thing. Yes?
They are willing to pay an awful lot of money
for what they think you know. Really?
Yeah, but I don't know anything.
That's never stopped you before, has it?
True.
They're coming.
Come along, Archie.
There we are. Here. For me?
What on earth is this? Rome telephone directories.
They're supposed to be NATO documents.
When the exchange is complete we will leave the village first.
Agreed? Agreed.
Off you go, Archie.
It's a far, far better thing that I do
than I have ever done.
Walk forward slowly.
We'll never get away with this.
You're under-rating Archie. I think we have.
Comrade, I cannot tell you how grateful I am
to be rescued from the decadence and imperialism of the west.
Excellent, excellent. Do you have the information?
You have the money? Of course.
Daniel's set an ambush down the road. Come on.
He'll never halt them on his own.
Goodbye, Archie.
Missile sites, diplomatic codes.
Spy networks. Everything you want to know.
All up here, old chap. Excellent, excellent.
That's worth a pretty penny, I suppose.
You'll find us very generous.
Good-o.
Grazie. Due, quattro.
Thank you, signore. Prego. Prego.
Well, don't look like that. What do you expect, John Wayne?
I say, your driver chappie seems to have taken the wrong turning.
Oh, no, no, no. It's all part of the plan.
You see we will be met by helicopter and then you will be whisked off
to one of our cruisers in the mediterranean.
Excellent, huh? Oh...
Look, I'm rather a bad sailor. Couldn't we go by land?
You British. Always the sense of humour.
Yes, we are rather hilarious at times.
Thank you.
Hello.
Mr price, mr danietski.
Goodbye. Safe journey. Oh, thank you.
Oh... oh, there you are.
I wondered where you'd got to.
Run, Archie! Run!
Ooh...
Come on, Archie, on your feet. Kay!
Kay... I hope I can call you Kay.
I'm going to Capri for a couple of weeks. You want to come along?
What do you say?
Daniel, why don't you top up the glasses.
You're such an expert with champagne.
Listen, Kay. I thought we might drive up the coast to puntalo.
I have a little villa there. We could... lie around the pool all day
and in the evening... There's Archie.
Oh, Archie.
Good old Archie. Archie.
Ah, hello there. Come along.
You're limping on the wrong foot. Am I really? Thanks.
Here's good old Archie. Archie, may we offer you a beaker?
It's jolly nice of you but I really haven't got time.
But you have one with me, will you?
Waiter, get these gentlemen a bottle of champagne, will you?
Archie, where on earth did you get that?
Didn't I tell you? Remember those two chaps from the embassy?
Well, I suggested they might like to lolly up a little trifle
in advance as a gesture of goodwill and they were surprisingly generous.
Well, good old Archie.
We really must go. Love to the family. Ready, darling?
Where are you going? After the Greek islands
I've chartered a little yacht. Should be fun, eh? Can't we come?
I say, that really is charming of you, but I think I can manage.
His side of the family always had sex appeal.
Oh... let's see if a little rubbed off on you.
Come along. House detective approach?
Why not? Bonjourno... Excuse me, are you staying...
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